Original subtitles

Downloaded from YTS.MX

[**]

Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX

CHARLIE: I guess it all started that day when Nick called

and said that the perfect job he had set up was gonna fall through.

He told me his new partner got hit by a bus.

Now, that was kind of unusual.

Nick never talked much about work before,

and we go way back, you know?

That's right, all the way back to reform school.

So when he called me up and said the perfect job

just might fall through because his new partner got hit by a bus,

I was pretty surprised. And interested.

You see, I always wanted to work with Nick,

so I says, "What about me?"

He didn't know.

But I begged, and I told him I'd be real good.

So finally he says okay.

But between you and me, I always kind of felt that it was, you know,

against his better judgment.

I remember Nick always saying,

"Jewels and dames: If you get one, you got the other."

And he's right.

We have been chasing skirts forever.

So anyway, we get together,

and he tells me he's investing 500 grand of his own,

everything he made on the Newport job.

So he says to me,

"Listen, kiddo, we'll walk away with at least a million and a half.

Each. And the train leaves tomorrow."

Nick doesn't fly. Too many things can go wrong.

You see, when you get to know a guy good,

you get to know what he likes.

You can tell what he's gonna do.

Well, you see, that's where I was wrong.

I never figured it would turn out like it did.

She was a... different kind of broad.

Not his kind of dame. Certainly not mine.

Anyway, he said that he had worked out the perfect psychological heist.

I had to look that one up.

MAN [FRENCH ACCENT]: Uh, pardon, monsieur, excusé.

I think I lose my wallet.

CHARLIE: What? You say you lost your wallet?

Oui. Yes. My wallet.

Maybe you move. Oui?

Yeah, sure, yes. What color is your wallet?

It's a black wallet. Black, huh?

Sorry for me. I lost a black wallet once.

It have a lot of money, huh? Oh, that's it.

Oh, that's-- Traveler's checks or cash?

[**]

This come from Cleveland?

MAN: That's what the guy said.

When did it come in?

When'd you want it to come in?

One, two, three, four.

Not exactly a bargain.

Ain't no bargains no more.

How many miles on it?

How many you want?

Nice to have known you.

Yeah.

[SIGHS]

Would you like your bags in here, sir?

Yeah. Here.

Buy yourself a house in the country.

Thank you, sir.

Hey, Nicky.

[WHISTLES]

Nothing wrong with this.

I could get used to this.

Will you take a look at this?

Reminds me of Orchard Beach.

Stupid bastard.

Lifting a wallet on the train like that.

You in a bad mood or something?

Hopeless goddamn juvenile.

The car? Safe and sound.

Yeah. We check out the store.

CHARLIE: It's uncrackable.

Three salesgirls, one manager, one doorman.

Moser alarm system, the best there is.

It's very well hidden, probably hooked up directly to police headquarters.

It's a fortress. Forget it.

NICK: 8:45, the manager arrives.

Make a note, he enters by the rear door.

Enters by the rear door.

8:50, the front gate is opened.

8:50,

front gate opened.

8:55, salesgirls arrive.

Eight--

Three of them.

[CHUCKLES]

Salesgirls. Pretty, huh?

Pretty.

9:00.

9:00.

All employees are in the store.

9:30, the jewels are in the display window.

The store is on daytime security.

Store is ready for business.

Ready for business.

9:35, doorman arrives.

9:35...

Ba-doom, doorman arrives.

Underline that for me.

I underline that for him.

9:36...

Ooh. I like that.

He likes that.

[**]

I could get in trouble over that.

I thought we were knockin' off Harry Winston's?

We are.

But your binoculars are not by that Harry Winston's.

Did you ever hear of parallax?

Parallax? Parallax.

Let me see your parallax.

Ooh.

She's a blonde, you parallax.

Brunette.

Blonde.

Brunette.

Whatever you say. I don't give a shit.

CHARLIE: Now, Nick has, what you call,

a real good power of concentration.

Problem is, you never know what he's gonna be concentrating on.

Lovely.

That's uncrackable.

The jewelry store...

but not the jeweler.

It's uncrackable.

You know, in life there are two kinds of people:

There are the customers and there are the merchants.

And the time has come for the customers to start screwing the merchants.

Oh, good day, sir.

You understand that, you understand everything.

We're not customers.

Yeah, but only you and I know that.

[FEEBLE VOICE]: But these are pretty, too. How much are they?

$49,990.

Fifty thousand.

Well, almost. Yes. Heh, heh.

Peanuts.

[CHUCKLES]

Oh, you have a charming smile, my dear.

It's nice to be near you.

Thank you, Debbie. Mm-hmm.

Good afternoon, sir. May I help you?

Oh, good afternoon, sir.

Yes, I do have a problem.

You see, of all the pieces,

I prefer the least expensive one.

Don't be upset about that, my dear sir, this is a lovely piece.

I mean, look at the color. Yes.

Uh, no, she's-- She's very particular.

Without wishing to pry, may I know the sort of lady for whom you intend...

My wife.

Oh. O-of about what age?

My wife? Mm-hmm.

Well, she's in the hospital.

Well, her condition, it's not good.

She's deteriorating.

She gets worse every day.

But she's 86 years old, and we expect the worse.

I'm so sorry, sir.

Now, you say this one is 50,000?

49,990.

Oh, well, that's very annoying!

Why would you quote a price with so many nines?

When one comes to Harry Winston, one expects round numbers.

It's absurd.

Yes, I'm sorry, sir. But New York decides the prices.

Absurd. It is.

Good. I've decided I'll take that.

The ruby ear clips? Yes, that.

I need a chair.

Debbie, help the gentleman with this chair.

Oh-- Oh, here's the chair.

Because I'm going to write a check.

Uh...oh, I need a pen.

Uh, I have a pen.

Oh, well, thank you very much.

Thank you, darling.

You know, I knew Harry Winston in his old days.

Ohhh, a wonderful man.

Say hello to him for me.

He was the king of diamonds.

Unhappily, sir--

Yes. And very aptly named because he's still the king.

Unhappily, sir, Mr. Winston passed away three years ago.

Harry Winston. Is gone?

Oh, yes. No.

Yes, indeed, sir. That's not possible.

No. Harry Winston?

Yes.

But then who is running the business?

His son Ronald. Ronald?

But little Ronald is only 12 years old.

Actually, sir, Ronald Winston's in his late 30s.

Oh, my God.

Oh, dear, how time has flown.

And Harry Winston is gone?

Oh...

Um, y-you wanted a pen, sir?

Oh, this manager is made in heaven.

Careful.

Easy. CHARLIE: Sorry, sorry.

49,990.

This guy is perfect, this phony weasel.

Of all the...

two-faced, hypocritical...

You know, they get a percentage of each sale, these guys.

And, oh, does this guy love money.

He's not the only one.

WOMAN [FRENCH ACCENT]: And here are the specials of the day:

rognon de veau, blanquette de veau,

moules, un salle,

filet de sole, ravioli langoustine.

Any of those, uh, corned beef and cabbage?

Uh, no, sir. Heh, I'm afraid not, sir.

Let's deliberate. Don't be hasty.

Everything is superb.

Excuse me, please.

Moules?

Well, my dears, how is everything?

Did you enjoy those scallops? Delicious. Thanks, Sunny.

Good. Listen, darling,

how much do you want for that little 18th century miniature I saw in your window?

Oh, no, Sunny, I'm not selling you another thing

until you sell me your little Louis the 16th table.

I love that table.

That's a family heirloom. You don't sell family heirlooms.

Not even to your dear old friend?

Not even to my dear old pal.

Now, darling, enjoy your mouldier.

Ciao.

Well, have you decided, sir?

Yeah-- No, not quite, uh...

would it be possible for me to speak to the owner?

I'm the owner. Is there any trouble?

Oh, no, none at all. No, uh...

That little table you have against the wall there,

could I ask you about that table?

[LAUGHS] Oh, it's contagious.

How much do you want for that table.

Oh, no, I'm sorry, sir. That table is not for sale.

It belongs to my father.

And where is your father?

In the cemetery, sir.

Ahh. You have decided, yes?

EDDY: Yeah. A sirloin steak.

SUNNY: Sirloin. That's a very good choice.

Rare? Isn't there some way, madame?

Cremated. Uh, cremated.

Excuse me. Just a moment, please.

And that comes with pomme de terre.

Well, isn't there some way that I can talk to you about buying that table?

I'm sorry, sir, there's absolutely nothing to be said about this table.

It's just not for sale.

It's not for sale. That's correct.

So you have absolutely no interest in selling it.

Not the slightest.

Regardless of how much I might offer?

Regardless.

So I have no chance.

None.

None.

[**]

CHARLIE: Can you believe it?

Paying 7 grand for something to put your feet on.

I don't mind telling you, I was worried.

Excuse me, madam.

Oh, may I help you, sir?

Uh, yes. I'd like to sell this table.

[GASPS]

That-- That's Sunny Felix's table.

Oh, you know Mrs. Felix?

I know her all right. Yes, um...

[LAUGHS]

Why are you laughing?

N-Nina. Nina, come here a minute, quickly.

Look. It's Sunny's table.

You know this table?

I most certainly do. Yes.

You know, I get the feeling that I've come in here with a bag of potatoes or something.

Why is everybody laughing? Is there some joke here that I don't know about?

Is the table a fake?

How did you know that I am in love with this table?

Well, I didn't know it, but I'm very glad to hear it because I wanna sell it.

She sold it to you?

I don't believe it.

Only yesterday she refused to part with it.

I can only say that, uh... it wasn't exactly a bargain.

Oh, I see.

So now you've come here to sell it to me for a little bit more.

No, no, no, I'm not interested in that at all. No.

No, but...it's a present.

It's a present for a lady,

and the lady left this morning.

You have a lovely smile.

Do tables always make you smile like that?

Um...

Well, this one. Yes.

Beautiful.

It is lovely, isn't it?

Yes, it is. Yes.

And I'm glad you like it.

NINA: Do you have the certificate that goes with it?

Who needs a certificate?

This table is signed, and what a signature.

Lien N'avril, the Enemy of Lecoca.

[PHONE RINGS]

NINA: Oh, I'll get that. Excuse me.

How much do you want for it?

Nine thousand dollars.

She made you pay $9000 for this.

[LAUGHS]

Well, you know when you buy a lady a present, the sky's the limit.

You give beautiful presents.

Ah, presents are never expensive.

Well, I can't at that price. I'm not interested.

Not interested?

No, I'm not. I'm very sorry.

Ah. Tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk.

What a shame.

MAN [OVER RADIO]: WRCH Palm Beach...

Good day. Goodbye.

...three days till Christmas.

How appropriate.

[HOLIDAY MUSIC PLAYING]

C'est la vie.

What happened?

I lost it. Why?

And on consignment, ma'am. What about that?

Would you take it just on consignment?

Yes, I'm quite willing to do that,

but it's really only as a favor to you because I--

Well, that's very kind of you, very kind.

Uh, I'm staying at the Breakers.

I'm just here for the season holidays,

And the table might as well be here as in my hotel room.

Okay. Okay, I'll-- I'll try, but--

I'm in room 510, ma'am.

510. Yes.

510. 510. Room 510.

Now that's very kind of you. Thank you very much.

Quite all right.

I really appreciate that.

Don't get too much sun.

Oh, I'll be careful.

Well, goodbye.

Goodbye.

Goodbye.

[**]

Hmm...interesting.

Good morning, madam. How are you today?

Good morning.

Madame, may I help you?

Uh, well, I'd like to see the manager, please.

Certainly. Thank you, darling, thank you.

NICK: You wanna hear something amazing, Charlie?

CHARLIE: Yeah, I would.

It's an amazing thing that a banana like you

is gonna participate

in the most stunning psychological heist this town has ever seen.

When the cops got us surrounded,

I hope you remember to bring your psychology.

You wanted to see me, madam?

Oh, y yes, uh,

you see, during the week, uh, my brother, Mr. Phelps Graham,

Uh, you are the manager, aren't you? I am, yes.

Yes, well, my brother was in, Mr. Phelps Graham,

and he bought some ear clips for his wife, Ethel.

Oh, yes, Mr. Phelps Graham, lovely man.

Yes, well, they won't do. They're just not right.

Oh, I'm sorry. What's the problem?

Well, she doesn't like them. Oh, I see.

Well, unfortunately, madam, once goods have left--

Well, I can't return them.

Oh, I beg your pardon. You want to exchange them.

No, I can't do that either.

Oh, may I have a glass of water, please?

Oh, surely. Um, we, uh--

Susan, a glass of water for the lady.

Here they are. Yes. You see, my problem is,

I don't want my brother to know that his wife didn't like the clips.

I'm very close to my brother,

and I don't want to see him hurt.

Of course not. Yes.

So, what I thought I'd do is,

I'd just tell him that she adored the clips,

and we'll get a bracelet to go with it.

What do you think? I think that's a wonderful idea.

Good. Well, that's very good for you, isn't it?

I suppose it is, yes. Yes, yes, it is, yes.

Uh, now, the problem's going to be to find something to please Ethel,

which is not going to be easy, but we'll do that.

Oh, I'm sure we will. Yes, we will.

I'm so nervous about all this.

Now, there's no need for that, madam.

Yes, well, you'll help me.

We'll choose something together.

Oh, thank you.

It's very difficult.

I suggest, madam,

that we eliminate the gray Tahitian pearls.

She's very sick, you know.

Yes, I heard.

But she's always been fussy.

Particular.

Impossible.

Yes, it must be quite a strain for you.

Well, I don't know where to turn.

Very difficult. But I-I'm sure you manage.

Well, I do my best.

It's a family trait, you know.

My father was that way.

We never knew what he was going through.

Well, I'm the same way.

I keep it all inside.

People don't wanna hear your troubles.

Th-that's a lovely piece you're wearing.

Oh.

Thank you.

My mother's.

Really? Yes.

It's French, you know. Is it?

Yes. It's a Dufawn.

It is? Very rare.

And who is Dufawn?

Well, he's a famous French jewelry maker.

And well-known is he? Oh, indeed he is.

Oh, wonderful. Uh--

I didn't recognize the name, but I do know quality.

Oh, and it shows.

Oh.

Oh, thank you.

And what is your name? Edward Saunders, Madame.

And may I call you Edward.

By all means. Yes.

I knew an Edward once, but I don't want to get into that.

Too...

Uh, now where was I? Well, I was suggesting, madam,

that we eliminated the gray Tahitian pearls.

You know, it used to be so much simpler.

At one time, Ethel's only passion was ice cream.

Oh, really? Well, I can appreciate that.

Yes, but a pint of Rocky Road costs less than a star sapphire.

[CHUCKLING] Yes, madam, very good.

And, madam, uh, it's a sweeter investment.

You're witty. Very witty.

Uh - I don't want to sway you unduly, madam,

but my feeling is that the diamond bracelet that you were originally attracted to--

Do you think so? I do.

Well, I'll take that one. It's enough dallying. It's done.

An excellent choice, madam. Yes. How much is it?

Sixty thousand dollars.

Well, round numbers this time.

R-round numbers? Yes, round.

Oh, your brother. Oh, he told you.

He did. Yes. Oh, he felt so badly.

Well, you know, he wanted me to apologize to you for him.

Madam, I understood perfectly.

What did I buy?

Well, for Ethel, this beautiful diamond bracelet.

Oh, yes, the diamond.

Now very important, Edward...

my brother must never know that his wife didn't like the ear clips.

Madam, you can rely on me.

Because he would be very hurt.

He loves her.

Don't ask me why.

Madam, it can be our secret.

[**]

EDWARD: Your lovely, madam. Thank you so much.

I do hope your sister-in-law likes the bracelet.

Oh, I'm sure she will.

Bye-bye now, madam.

My best wishes to your brother.

Thank you. Thank you very much.

Thank you so much. Thank you for your courtesy.

Thank you, madam. Bye-bye.

Excuse me for interrupting,

but I must tell you what a pleasure it is to look at you.

[GIGGLES]

Now that you're beautiful, that goes without saying,

but you have quality.

Thank you. How very nice of you. Yes.

The way you've done your hair, and that lovely blouse and smart skirt.

Quality. Very rare these days.

And I think I can say the same for you.

Well, never mind about that.

And the smile, quite lovely.

Well, Merry Christmas, darling.

Same to you.

Oh, a Louis the 16th table and quite nice.

I must tell my brother about that.

Bye-bye.

As my father used to say, you're the real McCoy.

Too-da-loo.

Now.

[**]

Point number two: 13 seconds,

passing the Epicurean, it's a restaurant.

Point number three, 33 seconds, passing Gucci's.

It's a nice straight line now, step on it.

Go ahead, hit it.

Point number four, passing the Eloquitz.

Point number five: 55 seconds, marina guards.

Point number six, one minute, 17 seconds; you arrive at the boat.

Point number seven: one minute, 32 seconds;

stow the jewels and anchors away.

CHARLIE: Now, this is what I'm waiting for.

Nick on the job,

like a... A fine-tuned clock.

He was something. All concentration.

But he wasn't listening to me.

I still think you should split when I do.

Let me see. Give me the watch.

See if you can tell time.

It's 1:15.

1:15, 1:15 and 2:10.

That's 3:15, that's 3:25.

That beats any alarm system. Good.

Perfect. Let's go home.

Still say you should go when I go.

Yeah. Tell that to Red Colors.

You know Red left the manager tied up.

The guy found a hidden button, he pushed it with his nose.

Red's doin' 12 to 20.

CHARLIE: Well, like I said,

he, um...

He wasn't listening to me.

[KNOCKING]

I'll get this. Okay.

Yes?

This table, ma'am, how much is it?

A rare and beautiful piece, at an exceptional price, too.

Ahh, isn't that wonderful?

But do you have a certificate?

Oh, this table is signed, sir.

Oh, but you know signatures are made to be copied.

Oh, yes, I know that Louis the 16th was copied under Napoleon the Third,

but it would be very difficult to imitate the style and perfection of Etienne Nagril.

Ahhh, Etienne Nagril. Mm-hmm.

Oh, ha ha ha ha.

Oh, the enviable Etienne.

Oh, you're a connoisseur.

Well, when it comes to Louis the 16th, yes, I do know my onions.

[CHUCKLES]

Now, how much is it?

Ten thousand.

Ten thousand?!

Not including the two chairs.

Well, I don't understand. What do you mean by not including the chairs?

Well, you see, I'd like to sell the three pieces together

because they're...family of the same period.

Oh, what a pity

because I'm only interested in the table.

Oh, that is a shame

because you can see how well they go together, can't you?

What a pity.

Yes, I'm truly heartbroken

because it's a beautiful work of art.

It is.

Something like yourself.

Oh.

Hm.

I think at my age, I'm permitted to say that.

That's very sweet of you, sir. Thank you.

Ummm...

e-excuse me. Sir.

It's a sacrifice, but...

all right, you can have the table.

Just the table for 10,000.

All right?

Oh no, I couldn't. Thank you very much.

But they are a family, and they do look well together.

No, no, no, no.

No, I can tell that you're a connoisseur

and I know you'll look after it.

No, really, I couldn't

because it's just not right to break up the family.

No, no, no, no,

no, I'd...

I'd like you to have it.

Well, now...are you sure you don't mind?

I'm positive.

Oh. Well, then, I'll take it.

And what we'll do is, we'll have the chairs visit on the weekend.

[LAUGHS]

Yes, we'll do that.

NICK: Oh, my God, they cut off his head.

CHARLIE: Who?

he king, Louis the 16th.

No shit. You know where they did it?

They did it in a public square. There were 20,000 people.

Yeah, I heard.

He was married, you know.

To Marie Antoinette, the most beautiful woman in France.

[PHONE RINGS]

Hello.

Hold on.

Louis 16?

Yeah? It's for you.

Oh, who is it? Marie Antoinette.

What?

Hello.

Oh, hello. It's Carolyn Benedict.

Oh, well, hello. Hi.

I think I have, uh...good news for you.

Now, it's taken a lot of time and effort on my part,

and I put ads in the paper,

and I've called all my dealer friends.

Lovely thief. And I think

I found a buyer for you.

But 8000 is about as high as he'll go.

Well, that sounds good. Yes. Mm-hmm.

Now, look, why don't we at least get together and talk about it?

[PIANO PLAYING ELEGANT MUSIC]

So you found somebody to buy my table?

Mm-hmm, but he'll only pay $8000.

Ah, yes, you told me.

So I'm gonna lose $1000 on this deal.

Not quite.

If you'll allow me, I'd like to buy the dinner.

Ahhh...well.

I can hardly refuse that offer.

Good.

I'll write you a check.

You know, there's no rush with that.

We can deal with it later on.

We're not on the clock.

Isn't this a business dinner?

Absolutely. Business, yes.

Wanna make that out to "cash"?

Well, now...everything hunky-dory?

Oh, everything is just fine. Good.

Come here, old pal, I want a word with you.

Oh?

You sold my table to a perfect stranger.

Ah, no.

It wasn't a selling, it was...a killing.

[WOMEN CHUCKLE]

I robbed you, didn't I, sir?

Well, not exactly because I let myself be robbed.

Oh, thank you.

Nine thousand dollars? Sunny, you're shameless.

Nine thousand dollars?

Well, let's just say that was the asking price.

Oh, you watch out for him.

He's really charming.

He got it for 7000.

[LAUGHS]

You...

You had the nerve.

So, now I'm the one who loses $1000.

Well, not quite, because now I'm gonna pay for the dinner.

[LAUGHS]

I don't even know my own business.

You mad at me?

Oh, yes, I'm furious.

It's very becoming.

The second one, the American, lived vicariously.

You know, he prayed with St. Augustine,

he suffered with Tennessee Williams

and argued with Kerouac,

and I couldn't take another minute of it.

He sounds like a bit of an oddball.

Yes.

So who's the intellectual in your life now?

He's a curator.

Ahhh.

[**]

Well, anyway, uh...

you look like anything but a married woman.

How am I supposed to take that?

How're you supposed to take it?

Well, tomorrow night's Christmas Eve,

and I can't think of anybody that I'd rather spend Christmas Eve with than you.

Oh, I can't.

Tomorrow night the museums are closed.

Ahhh.

And I don't think my dinner guests, uh, would amuse you.

Intellectuals, huh? There'll be a lot of quoting.

Now, suppose, uh...

we move Christmas Eve ahead 24 hours.

The hotel has plenty of champagne

the suites are very comfortable,

and the orange juice is fresh.

Oh.

What a pity.

I have a felling that I, uh...

You did.

...went a little too far.

Just a little.

I'm curious. Was it the champagne or the suites?

[LAUGHS] The orange juice.

Ahhh. Slip of the tongue. I just tilted my hand.

It's a mistake. It'll never happen again.

Well, I hope not.

Well, why don't we just drop it and...

maybe pick it up again later?

No, no. I live here.

Oh.

Oh, I didn't realize.

Yes, I live upstairs.

Well, I'll bet it's a lovely place. I'd like to see it.

Well, good night.

Thank you.

You horse's ass.

Orange juice.

You had to throw in orange juice.

Orange juice.

CHARLIE: When he got back to the hotel that night,

I reminded him how he ended up in reform school in the old days.

He was 16, doing his first job, and taking along this bimbo.

Well, he didn't pay attention to the job, and he got nabbed.

So he tells me not to worry about it.

Says he's got it under control.

Sure, Nick.

That's the best you can do?

Don't look bad.

Talk, try and disguise your voice.

Don't you think I look more intelligent?

Talk, we're trying to change your voice.

Yeah, but don't I look more intelligent like this?

Change your voice.

[NORMAL] Don't you-- I said your voice.

Don't you understand what I'm saying?

I changed it.

Look at me. I am.

Turn around, look at me. I am.

Look at my chin. Come here.

Try and talk without moving your lower jaw.

Like this. Look, look at me, look at me.

Like this is paralyzed.

Now say, "Good morning, sir."

Good morning, sir.

Again.

Good morning, sir.

Count to five.

One, two, three, four.

No, no, you're talking normally.

Try and change your voice.

One, two, three, four, five.

All right, forget it.

I think it's better if you talk normally.

Yeah, I prefer that. That's better.

Yeah, I prefer that.

I got an idea.

What?

If I don't speak at all, it'll be better still.

Now you're talking.

[**]

[KNOCKS ON DOOR]

CHARLIE: Hello?

Oh, yes. Um, m-may I help you?

I'm here for the little table.

Oh. Oh, yes.

Here, let me help you. No, no it's fine.

Thank you.

And, uh...

here's the balance.

Thank you very much, and I'll get you a receipt.

Won't be a minute.

"The rare and beautiful belong together.

"Old men are allowed notes like this.

Your ancient admirer."

[LAUGHS]

Such a dear.

[MOUTHS] Thank you.

CHORUS [OVER SPEAKERS]: * We wish you A merry Christmas *

* We wish you A merry Christmas *

* We wish you A merry Christmas *

Merry Christmas.

* And a Happy New Year

Oh, thanks, Charlie.

What happened to your pocket?

You rip it?

Wanna buy a couple of girls tonight?

Oh, not tonight.

Midnight Mass, if you want, but no girls.

Yeah, you're right. You're right.

I bet you think that's a watch.

Yeah, it's a Timex.

That explodes.

It explodes.

Yeah.

Here. Let me show you.

You see the back part is magnetized, huh?

That goes up against the safe.

Now here's how you set it.

You push this, and this goes to zero.

Now you push the red button, that activates it.

And you got 30 seconds.

That'll take out a whole safe.

I'll be damned.

What's this?

[WHISTLES]

Authentic Louis 16.

Charlie, that's beautiful.

Marie Antoinette kept that under her pillow.

You blew a fortune on this.

Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas, Nick.

* Silent night

* Holy night

* All is calm

* All is bright

The last time I went to Midnight Mass was in '62...in jail.

* Round yon virgin Mother and child *

* Holy infant

* So tender and mild

* Sleep in

* Heavenly peace

Look, the issue is

not whether the traditional ossified ceremony we witnessed this evening

is devoid of meaning.

Nor is the issue whether I'm some kind of pious agnostic

guilty of charming simplicities.

The issue is, must we choose between a ruthless scientific empiricism

and an equally blind religious fanaticism.

Is this the only choice?

God, I hope not.

You know, talking about fundamentalism,

did you know that Jenny Blakely was born again?

MAN: Jenny Blakely?

[GROUP LAUGHS]

We are living in an era

of a deliberate cultivation of ignorance.

Well, now, did you read, uh, Madame Kundaer's

Copenhagen address last month?

He talks about Flobear's discovery

of stupidity in the 1860s.

Huh, you know, it is a permanent factor.

It's not gonna go away.

[GROUP LAUGHS]

Tell me, um...what do you think of all of this?

You haven't said a word tonight.

Oh, well, you know, I don't go to church much.

Well...

We're considering

a handsome retrospective of London next year.

Do you know Hansen's work?

Uh, no, I don't.

Dwayne Hansen the American sculpture, you must've seen it.

Life size, super-realistic, plastic models

of American tourists in those tacky clothes.

Oh, no.

Also, if you get the chance,

the German expressionist show is really something.

Unless you've seen that already.

Uh, no.

Well, it's had terrific reviews across the country.

Do you bother with reviews?

No, I don't.

Well, then, um...how do you choose an exhibition?

The same way that I choose a woman.

I take a risk.

Look, uh...don't be offended by the question, but...

how did you two ever manage to meet Carolyn?

CAROLYN: Well, I'd like to change the conversation.

I've had enough of this one.

Thank you for dinner and Merry Christmas.

WOMAN: Merry Christmas. MAN: Good night.

CHARLIE: Thanks for inviting us.

It's been real nice.

[MAN CHUCKLES]

Carolyn.

I'd like everyone to leave.

[GROUP LAUGHS]

No, I mean it.

I want you all to go.

MAN: Carolyn, they have no sense of humor,

but not you, not us. Just be nice and go. Please.

Look, it's getting late.

We probably should.

Fine.

Sorry.

Christmas tomorrow.

Merry Christmas. Good night.

Helen, talk to you.

Merry Christmas.

Merry Christmas, Peter.

See you tomorrow.

That was unfair.

This wasn't Christmas Eve, it was a courtroom.

I didn't like the questions or the people asking them.

I want you to leave too.

You can go back to New York.

What has gotten into you?

I wanna feel something for a change.

And I wanna be with someone who knows who he is.

Merry Christmas.

[THUNDER RUMBLES]

CHARLIE: I remember thinking

when we got back from that wonderful dinner,

well, now at least Nick can forget about Carolyn and her fancy friends,

and get back to work.

[PHONE RINGS] I got it.

Hello?

So I was wrong.

Charlie, who is it?

Who do you want it to be?

[**]

I just called to tell you that...

I should've spent Christmas Eve with you and you alone.

And I wanted you to know that.

[RAIN PATTERING]

Hey, Nick, come on.

Is the girl really that special?

I wish she wasn't.

Mr. Phelps Graham's sister's here again.

Good afternoon, madam.

How are you?

Oh, good afternoon.

We'll, I'll manage, but I feel very badly for my brother.

His wife is much, much worse.

Oh, I am sorry.

Yes, the doctors are very worried.

Oh, dear, oh, dear.

As a matter of fact, that's why I'm here today.

He wants me to get her a last present.

I see.

Yes. But it has to be something very beautiful.

Of course, he doesn't know what.

Tell me, madam, did she like the bracelet?

It doesn't appear that way.

No, no. No. She didn't.

Madam, why don't we step inside,

make ourselves really comfortable

and see what we can find.

Yes, but it has to be something very beautiful,

because...

[SOBBING] a last present is a last present.

I don't know. I don't know.

I just don't know.

You see, I'm doing the same thing my brother did.

I'm drawn to the least expensive piece.

But, madam, $130,000 is hardly--

I'm so sorry to hesitate like this.

Please, excuse me.

But at these prices, it's perfectly natural.

Tell me...

you don't happen to have

photographs of these necklaces, do you?

Photographs of these? Yes.

No, madam, I'm afraid they haven't been cataloged yet.

Oh, what a pity. What a shame.

Because then I could've taken them to Ethel,

and that way she could've chosen them herself.

Oh, I see. Yes.

And furthermore,

she would've had the pleasure of participating, don't you see?

I-I, see. Yes, yes. Yes, yes.

[TOGETHER] Yes.

I see.

Tell me...

would it be possible for me to take pictures?

Would you permit that?

You? Yes.

Well, i-it's most unusual, madam.

Oh, Edward.

Most unusual.

Please, is it possible?

Well, for you.

Oh, thank you, Edward. Thank you so much.

I'm so grateful.

Please. It means so much to me.

Not at all. Thank you, darling.

Just thank you.

EDWARD: Everything all right?

Oh, yes, yes. Everything is fine.

This is so kind of you, so kind.

Now, what I'll do is

I'll drive to the hospital immediately and show her the photographs.

Then later this evening,

either myself or my brother will be back to get the one she chooses.

Oh, yes, but please don't come any later than 7:30.

For security reasons, quite easy to understand,

we have to close at 7:30 precisely.

Well, never fear.

We'll be prompt.

It's a family trait.

[WOMEN CHATTING INDISTINCTLY]

No, it doesn't look as if she's going to make it back.

I'm afraid she won't.

Good night. Good night.

That's it, ladies. Closing time.

So when'd you meet him? The other night.

Yeah? Go to a movie?

We never got that far.

I had a really good time.

Oh, I bet you did.

[WOMEN LAUGHING]

Is he married? I don't think so.

But they never tell you the truth anyway.

That's the truth.

Good night. Good night.

Good night, ladies.

Good night.

Mind how you go. We will.

Good night. Good night.

Oh, hello. Harry Winston here.

Would you connect the night alarm system, please?

[**]

Thank you.

[CAR APPROACHING]

It's after 7:30. Thank God, we're on time.

What, with the traffic, I was terrified we'd be late.

There. This one. Yes.

This one. The most expensive one. This one.

I'm sorry, sir, but all the necklaces are in the safe.

The store's on night security.

I did say 7:30.

Yes, yes, yes, yes. I do understand.

But this is so important to me.

I must tell you something.

The doctors say this may be her last night.

I don't know what I'm going to do without her.

Maybe you can do this for me.

I beg you. You must understand.

Very well. Oh, thank you.

Look, I've... Thank you.

...got to ask you to wait here in the car.

Yes, fine.

No one's allowed inside while the safe's open.

Yes, fine. Just give me five minutes.

Thank you.

Thank you, sir.

CHARLIE: When I saw her at the window...

well, I can tell you I almost lost 20 pounds.

Good night, Edward. See you tomorrow. Good night.

And if she sees you-know-who in the back seat, you can kiss Rio goodbye.

[**]

Hello, Harry Winston's here. I need to get into the safe.

Could you disconnect the night alarm system for a couple of minutes?

Of course.

The sea is calm, and all is well.

[RINGS]

Thank you.

Hello, Harry Winston's again.

You can reconnect the night alarm now.

The sea is calm and all is well.

[RINGS]

Thank you.

Thank you.

Please come in, sir.

Thank you very much. Not at all.

You're very kind.

Not at all.

Yes, I'm sorry about all these precautions,

but after 7:30, it does get very complicated.

No, no, no, no, no.

It is I who should apologize to you.

Not at all, sir.

I-is this the one? Oh, yes, yes.

Oh, yes, this is the one. The blue.

Yes. How much is it?

$170,000, sir.

$170,000.

Yes. Yes. Very good.

Now, if you have a pen, if you don't mind.

Oh, how stupid. It never occurred to me.

What is it? What? I didn't think.

Well I can't possibly accept a check at this hour.

But why is that? I should've told you in the car.

But you've already accepted checks of mine...

Yes, I know. ...without any problem.

So why can't--? I have indeed, sir.

Well, you see, over $10,000,

I have-- I have to call the bank.

After 7:30, that's simply not possible.

Oh, my dear.

Well, what...?

Well, what if I gave you cash?

Cash? Oh, well, then, there'd be no problem.

Oh, that's good then.

Yes, would you call my chauffeur, do you mind?

Ask him to bring my attaché case.

Yes. Thank you. Sir-- Sir, even--

even though we're on night security, I can't,

I absolutely can't leave you alone here in the store.

Oh, that's ridiculous.

No, I'm sorry, sir.

New York gives the orders, you know.

I'm only the manager.

But it's absurd to an older person. Well, it is.

It is, I quite agree. Absurd.

Richard, my case.

Yes. And hurry please.

We must hurry because...

Oh, my goodness, I'm afraid we won't get there on time.

We'll be as quick as we can, sir.

Yes. Oh, that would be just terrible,

Terrible. Dreadful.

Oh, I think of you, sir.

You should've seen her face when she saw the picture.

Oh, how lovely. Oh, it's.. It's beautiful.

Well, it is beautiful, yes, sir.

She's going to be immensely pleased.

I'm, uh, sorry, sir.

I didn't know which case you needed.

Ah, yes, Richard. Uh, the black one, please.

Uh-huh. Put it just here.

Excuse me. Yes.

Ah, very good.

Thank you, Richard. That will be all.

Off you go. Yes.

Hold this for me. Very well.

I don't like Richard to see so much money.

It's not good.

Ah! Yes, there we are.

Now, you said, uh, 170, yes?

That's right. All right, yes.

Forty thousand, 80,000,

120, and 160

and ten is 170. Good.

Now, you better count that yourself.

Oh, I'm sure that won't be necessary, sir.

Oh, please.

I'll put that in a pretty package for you.

Oh, no, no. Just put it in here.

What? I-in the case?

Yes, in the case because... Oh, yes.

we don't have time, you see.

At least let me...

Oh, she's going to be so happy with that.

Thank you very, very much.

Not at all, sir. I do hope she likes it.

Now I must rush.

Yes, I think she will like it.

All right. All right.

Off we go.

She will like it, you know, because, you see, she picked it out herself.

Oh, she did indeed, sir.

And I'm so sorry for all these complications.

I am but the manager. It's no trouble.

Well, good night, sir. Good night.

My prayers go with you. Yes.

[EXHALES]

Hello. Harry Winston here again.

Look, I've just received an important sum of cash,

and I want to put it in the safe.

Could you disconnect the night alarm system for me?

Of course.

The sea is still calm and all is well.

[RINGS]

Thank you.

[BEEPS]

CHARLIE: This is a stickup! Don't touch a thing.

Don't step on any buttons or ring any bells, or you're dead!

You got it?!

Yes. I got it.

Here! Catch!

Everything out of the safe and into the bag!

Come on!

Get to work, you friggin' nitwit!

[**]

Let's go a little faster! What do you say?!

Don't look at me!

Let's go!

Come on, the next shelf.

Let's speed it up, I haven't got all night.

I said, don't look at me!

All right, the next one.

Come on!

This gun is getting real heavy.

Real heavy, you know what I mean?

I'd hate to mess up that pretty suit.

Come on, those pearls in the back.

Be a good little boy and put all our money in there too.

Come on.

Is that all of it?

All right, stand up.

Stand to one side.

Okay, that's it. Come on out.

Take it easy.

Turn around.

Turn around!

Gimme the bag.

Come on, let's go.

On the floor!

Gimme the keys!

Come on, come on!

Up!

Open.

[GROANS]

CHARLIE [OVER WALKIE-TALKIE]: Point number three, all is well.

Point four, all is well.

Point number five, all is well.

Point number six, all is well.

Point number seven, everything's okay.

Point number eight, everything looks very, very well.

[LAUGHS]

What's wrong with this door?

Why won't it open?

Why won't it open?!

Why won't it open?

You gonna tell me why?!

[PHONE RINGS]

This is Lieutenant Stillman, Palm Beach Police.

It's for you.

The party's over, pal.

Look, we know you're in there robbing Harry Winston's.

You're gonna be surrounded in 30 seconds.

You don't have a chance of getting away, pal.

Be smart, give up.

Don't make it worse on yourself.

Nobody has to get hurt. I promise you.

That son-of-a-bitch.

You do the right things... It's not what you think.

[HANGS UP PHONE]

When the door to the vault and the door to the safe

remain open for longer than two minutes,

that locks the doors to the store...

...and signals the police.

[SOFTLY] It can't be true.

[SIRENS WAILING IN DISTANCE]

[TIRES SCREECHING]

COP: Get everybody back! Everybody back!

[PEOPLE CLAMORING]

Come on, get inside.

Why. What--? What's going on?

There's been a robbery. Come on, please get inside.

STILLMAN [OVER MEGAPHONE]: You have five minutes to come out with your hands up.

Five minutes.

Hello?

Yes, I wanna speak to Mr. Fields.

In four minutes, we move in.

Well, the only way I can get outta here

is to go out with the manager as a hostage.

What do you think?

What do you want me to tell you, Nick?

Well, you're the lawyer. Tell me what to do.

No, it's too high a price. How high?

Don't take a hostage, Nick. I beg of you.

It could give them an excuse to shoot you.

Now, look, you'll automatically get 12 and a half to 25 if you take a hostage.

Go out there without firing a shot, no hostage, and it's six to 12.

And I might be able to get you four and a half to nine.

Okay. Nice knowin' you.

STILLMAN: Okay, there's no way out!

The doors are being released.

[SIGHS]

All right, let's go.

Get some air.

[**]

Shall I open the door?

Yeah.

All right, sergeant, hang back.

Okay, let's go. Come on.

Hands on the wall.

Put your hands behind your back.

Doin' real good.

Come on, let's go.

Come on, lighten up.

You'll be out in 10 to 15 years.

Watch your head, pal.

CHARLIE: Well, when I first heard about it,

I naturally figured it was her.

Then I got it straight.

Turns out she was a real stand-up broad,

the real jewel in this job.

She went out and got him the best lawyer.

All through the trial, she stuck by Nick.

And even when the cops grilled her,

Carolyn never fingered me.

It's the first time in my life

that I can't touch the man I love.

This is complicated.

The Feds got involved.

I'm gonna be extradited.

Where? New York.

We'll manage.

CHARLIE: So she moved up and moved in.

She was quite a lady.

Me, I laid low, fenced the jewels

and waited for Nick to get out.

I've redone your apartment.

I hope you're going to like it.

I'm living there now.

You changed your hair.

Yes. Don't you like it?

Well, when a woman changes her hair...

it usually means she's changing men.

Well, I I did change men.

Remember?

Are you jealous?

[CHUCKLES]

I got the time in here.

At the trial, I only had eyes for you.

And I still only have eyes for you.

I love you, Nick.

Don't you know?

I can't stop thinking about you.

You're the only one I want.

The only one I've ever wanted.

I love you.

I love you.

MAN: Well, I think I have

a very pleasant surprise for you gentlemen.

The parole commission has granted you three

a conditional New Year's parole.

Congratulations.

Tonight you'll be able to go home

and celebrate New Year's Eve with your loved ones.

Now, when you leave my office,

you will receive a folder containing the name...

CHARLIE: Nick smelled a rat and he was right.

The cops were getting a lot of heat on the Winston's job,

so...they stuck a tail on him

and figured he'd lead them to me...and the jewels.

As soon as he got out, he calls me.

We hadn't talked since the disaster.

I wanted to get to him first so I could tell him about Carolyn,

you know, try to make him understand.

But when he called, I couldn't hear nothin'.

Ever since the phone company sold itself

or whatever the hell it did,

the damn things don't work no more.

Say something.

Hello.

Come on, Charlie, we're gonna be late.

Last chance.

Who's that?

Nobody.

Do you want this tie or the other one?

I'll let you know.

[PLAYING "AULD LANG SYNE" SOMBERLY]

Happy New Year.

Happy New Year.

Hey, Pa! Jimmy!

JIMMY: Happy New Year.

No, the white.

Here you go.

Hey! Happy New Year! Heh, heh.

[SIRENS WAILING]

[PHONE RINGING]

CAROLYN: Hi, love. Look, I'm running late,

so just put some ice in the bucket

and I'll be there. I'll be there soon. Okay?

Steve?

Hello? Steve?

Steve.

[LOCK CLICKING]

Carolyn.

Carolyn.

You home?

[SMOOTH JAZZ PLAYING, PEOPLE CONVERSING]

Happy New Year. Happy New Year.

Is Frankie G here?

No. He should be here shortly though.

All right, I'll just wait at the bar.

* 'Cause I only have eyes

* For you

* Dear

* Don't be cryin'

* But I can't see

* A thing in the sky

* Cause I

ALL: * Only have eyes

* For you

* I don't know if

* we're in a garden

* Or on a crowded

* Avenue

* You are here So am I *

* Waving millions of people Goodbye *

But the

* But they all disappear

* From view

* 'Cause I only have eyes

* For you

And I have you *

* I only have eyes for you

[APPLAUSE, CHEERING]

[FESTIVE JAZZ PLAYING]

MAN: Nick.

It's been a long time. How are you?

I've been better, Frank.

When'd you get out?

I've haven't been out a couple of hours.

I got your call. I got a tail.

Two guys at the end of the bar. Don't look now.

I'm gonna ask you a favor.

I'm gonna put you on the spot.

It's okay.

They pretended to let me out tonight.

It's not true.

They're following me to get to my partner on the Winston job.

When they see me here talking to you,

they're gonna think you're my partner.

I want it to stay that way.

Keep 'em on that track for a couple of days.

Then all of a sudden you can remember that December 1980, you were...

You got it. You can count on me. Huh?

You're a good man, Frank.

Good luck, Nick.

[INAUDIBLE]

Gentlemen, your tab.

[PEOPLE CONVERSING INDISTINCTLY]

MAN: Happy New Year!

Hey! Happy New Year, Charlie.

Hell of a party, hell of a party.

MAN 2: Hey, Charlie, happy New Year.

WOMAN: Oh, Charlie.

[PIANO PLAYING "AULD LANG SYNE"]

MAN 3: Happy New Year!

Yeah, I wanna speak to Charlie.

WOMAN: Which Charlie?

The round one.

The round one? Who's calling?

Louie 16.

Charlie? Yeah?

Telephone.

Thank you. Who is it?

Louie 16.

Louie who?

Louie 16.

[LAUGHS]

Hello?

Happy New Year, Banana.

Where are you?

NICK: Charlie.

Jesus Christ.

What the hell are you doing here?

They let me out.

They let you out?

To get to you.

You got a tail?

Yeah, but I'm clean for a few hours.

Son of a bitch.

You made it.

You made it.

You were right.

Thank God you're out.

[CHUCKLES]

You're not gonna start bawling, are you?

[WEAKLY] No.

How you been?

I'm okay.

How are you?

I'll be fine.

I'm really glad to see you.

I'm glad to see you, too.

And Carolyn, what about her?

Have you seen her again?

No.

I'm asking you, have you seen her?

The guy, who is he?

How should I know?

There's nothing new here.

She always lived like a guy.

You knew that from the start.

You told me.

Like a guy is one thing,

With a guy, that's something else.

In a few days, you'll...

you'll see things clearer.

NICK: Is this the first time I eve? saw you open a safe with a key.

Well, I'm versatile.

Some broad told me that the other night.

There you go.

Isn't that a pretty sight?

This is everything?

That's it.

How much?

Your share, a million-one.

I thought it'd be more.

Hey, we both did.

But after you got busted, there was a lot of heat.

Our guy took a walk, so I had to get another fence.

You know what I mean?

Okay.

Now we're goin' to the airport.

Will you stop with the airport?

I'm telling you, the girl still loves you, no matter what she's up to.

Don't you get it? I said the airport.

You don't get it, do you, you nitwit?

You got a girl who loves you.

You got a pal here who'll go out and rob with you.

You're gonna be bored stiff down there in Brazil.

You can't even samba.

Freedom hasn't helped your mind.

No, uh...luggage stub, sir?

Uh, no. No luggage.

Come on. Wake up. It's 1987.

Right.

Girls do that now. Just like you and me.

Wonderful.

It don't mean anything.

It's a great way to live.

You board in five minutes, sir. Have a good flight.

Five minutes. Five.

Thank you.

Okay, okay. Look...

give me a week, I'll dump everything here...

and I'll see you in Rio.

Adios.

Carolyn?

What about her?

What should I tell her?

Nothing.

That's not nice.

Have a good trip.

CHARLIE: I remember thinking after I left him,

poor guy, sittin' there with a sack full of loot,

on the lamb,

but runnin' from the best thing that ever happened to him.

["ONLY HAVE EYE FOR YOU" RIFF PLAYS]

[RINGS]

[MOANS]

[RINGS]

Yes, hello.

Oh, my love...

where...? Where are you?

Did you escape?

Oh, hurry.

I'm waiting for you.

[**]

Guess I better get my coffee downstairs.

Yeah. That'd be a good idea.

Sure you wanna do this?

Yes. Absolutely. Look.

Steve, I never lied to you about the situation.

Now, did I?

No, you never...lied.

Listen, I'll, um... I'll need the key.

Oh, right.

Here.

Thanks.

You take care of yourself, okay?

Yeah, you too.

Ciao.

Right. Bye.

Bye-bye.

CHARLIE: There he was.

She was hugging him,

and he was still stuck back in the '40s.

I told him, "If it had been you waiting for her,

"you would've had three broads, all different and doing handstands.

Nick, she's human."

See the changes I've made.

I don't suppose you recognize a thing.

So, what do you think of the kitchen?

It's completely modernized.

It's better now, don't you think?

[DISHES CLATTER]

Well, sit down.

Oh, and I got rid of the cockroaches.

[LAUGHS]

All right, I'll get us some coffee,

some real coffee.

And it's fresh.

Aren't you gonna take your coat off?

It was...

my way...

of waiting.

To keep from dying.

It was my way of staying alive.

You know, nobody's perfect.

And we both got caught.

[LAUGHS]

Hey...

I love you...

and nothing else matters.

[**]

[FESTIVE SAMBA MUSIC PLAYING]

Ooh-hoo!

Would you like some champagne, madam?

[HIGH-PITCHED] Oh, no, thank you, young man. I'm high on life.

I can see that.

[NORMAL] And it's all your fault. I'm in love.

Well, really!

[HIGH-PITCHED] Oh, it's all right, ma'am.

She's been with the family for years.

[LAUGHS] Oh, Nick.

CHARLIE: So that night we were all on the plane to Rio.

Carolyn opened an antique store.

Me, I'm in the export business now.

Beef and wallets.

And Nick tells me Harry Winston is gonna open a place down here in May.

Some people just never learn.

[**]