Original subtitles

Murder.

Maker.

Murder-maker.

- Come here. - No way.

Oh, come on. Be brave.

It's a tempest in a teacup.

What's a tempest?

It's like a really big storm.

That's what we've got.

A really big tempest in a teacup.

Yeah. Hey, will you grab me a piece of paper?

Okay. Ready?

Count of three. Ready? One, two, and three.

- Three! - I got it.

I'm gonna go outside and let him go. You wanna come?

No way. But do it right there so I can see?

Okay, you got it.

Dad's gonna think this is awesome.

How about this is our thing? You and me?

Yeah, cool. Just us.

♪ Everybody seems to wonder ♪

♪ What it's like down here ♪

♪ I gotta get away from this everyday running around ♪

♪ Everybody knows this is nowhere... ♪

- Ah...

- Oh.

♪ Everybody knows... ♪

* Everybody knows ♪

♪ Everybody, everybody knows ♪

* Everybody knows this is nowhere ♪

Hey.

What are you doing?

I was just up in the hayloft

cleaning up this submarine fort thing I built for Arlo.

Might repaint Mer's tea party table too.

It's dumb. I know they don't go up there anymore. I just thought, "Why not?"

Are the animals still worked up?

Yeah. Goats... Sagebrush, especially Ginger.

I don't know. It's weird.

Something got 'em really spooked.

You, uh, make peace with my mom?

I will.

Okay.

You want me to walk Ginger down to the clinic so you can check her out?

Uh, I already closed everything up for the weekend.

This is hard...

not talking about what's really going on with us, Maggie.

I told you, James,

I'm not ready to talk.

You ready?

- One... - One, two, three.

Hey.

Whoa. Okay...

Settle. Settle.

Jeez. Okay.

Hey...

Here.

What's up with you, huh? Come here.

- Hey.

All right.

Mr. Goat?

Where are you, Mr. Goat?

I am glad that you're here.

You say that now.

- Look, Ellen... - You know, I-I was lonely.

I-I was living alone.

So that's why I'm thrilled to be here.

But it's not just because of that

or because I get to see these kids grow up, but...

I'm-I'm here for James.

Maggie...

I'm here for you too.

Well, I shouldn't have said what I said earlier.

Remind me what that was...

You're not a pothead and I don't think you have an addled brain.

I wish I could get everybody else stoned

so that people wouldn't stare at the old lady with the tremor.

Well, one, fuck anybody who stares.

And two, I really do understand why you smoke,

and it's fantastic that it helps you,

and three, it's not you that I'm angry with.

Look, it's none of my business,

but if there's anything that you need...

Thank you.

Well, you also know that I'm not the easiest person to help on a good day.

You know, recognizing that you have a problem

is often the first step.

I appreciate everything that you're doing, and I apologize for being a bitch.

That smells wonderful, and I will now grab the troops

for a lovely family meal.

Hey, have you seen your brother?

- What? - That's rotting your brain.

My brain's in better shape than yours.

Well, one might think so, but...

"Two households, both alike in dignity, in fair Verona,

where we lay our scene, from ancient grudge break to new mutiny,

where civil blood makes civil hands unclean.

- From forth the fatal loins of these two foes..." - Mmm.

Can you name the four chambers of a cow's stomach?

Rumen, reticulum, omasum, abomasum.

Gosh, I hope I pass the test.

That's my girl.

- Now, where's Arlo? - How should I know?

Well, he was up here a minute ago.

Oh, dinner's ready.

No Arlo?

Oh, no. I-I thought I heard someone go out,

but I was so into the cooking...

Hey, have you seen Arlo?

He's probably hiding.

He, uh...

he jack-in-the-boxed out of our closet last week

and it scared the shit out of me.

Right.

Yeah, he, uh, did the same thing to me yesterday.

It's the Shanleys.

You gotta be kidding me.

Hey, Maggie, it's our horse, Scout.

You gotta help him, please.

Dad?

Mer, your brother's MIA. Can you go look for him?

- I wanna see what's going on. - Mer, please, can you just go find him?

I'll go. I'll go. I'm sure Arlo's just hiding for fun.

- Yeah. - Okay.

- Hey... Hey, Scout.

- Hey, boy. Oh...

Okay, you're all right.

I gotcha. Oh...

Nicholas said he did all that to himself.

What, a rattlesnake scare him?

Might panic, bolt. But this?

We're sorry for showing up after hours. If it weren't an emergency...

Oh, no, it's fine. Ruben, how about you, me, and Scout head to the clinic.

Uh, why am I not seeing Arlo?

- It's okay, Mom's got him. - No, she doesn't.

Okay. Meryl, can you check the barn and garage?

The rest of us will double-check the house.

I got him. I got him.

Okay, let's go.

- Arlo?

Arlo!

All right. Easy...

Can you back him out?

Our animals have been acting strange too.

Must be something.

Oh my God...

What did you do?

Hey, Arlo, you up there?

- Arlo, I'm counting to five.

Anybody else use a little courage?

I'm certainly not gonna say no.

Yeah, sure thing.

I just rode him out to check the fence lines.

It's part of my chores. It was so... weird.

I was telling him "whoa" to stop,

but that's when Scout started bucking and neighing. He got spooked.

And I was calm like you taught me, Mom, and I got him to stop.

But then he just put his head up against the fence

and started moving it back and forth and back and forth.

But I thought he was maybe scratching an itch,

but he started doing it really, really hard.

I could see that he was bleeding and he just kind of twisted up against the fence and fell.

It was so scary. I ran to get Dad.

Maggie's gonna take care of Scout, okay?

I'm gonna go up just to be triple-sure,

and then... I guess it's time to head outside.

Uh, Valeria, could you grab a couple of flashlights from the living room, please?

- Mm-hmm. - Thank you.

Our secret.

This is from his first album.

Oh, I'm impressed.

♪ He's a perfect stranger... ♪

What is that?

Same kind of thing happened in the car.

I think Dad said it was just, like, the weather or something.

Hey, uh, do you know what I like to do?

What?

Uh, whenever I'm, you know, worried

or sad, or scared,

I like to name the thing out loud, whatever it is, and then I add a "but."

What?

Well, "Arlo is missing... but we're gonna find him."

And, "This is scary, but I have a little whiskey to give me courage."

* If you see him in the subway ♪

♪ He'll be down at the end of the car ♪

All right...

You ready?

- Whoa.

Okay, nice and easy.

Easy. Okay.

Okay. Steady. Steady.

Easy, easy, easy.

Okay...

The eyes look fine. We have a few cuts,

but nothing too terrible.

Just like that, we're looking at a bright-side situation.

What?

If this is bright side, I don't want to see the dark.

Ah. Well, the nose is why all the blood.

It's a lot of bleeding with the nostrils.

If it wasn't his muzzle, I'd just use staples.

You wanna learn how to stitch a wound?

Absolutely.

All right.

Let's see.

- Oh, shit.

Shit?

Shit.

I should have seen that.

Hey.

You haven't said anything to Ruben?

No. I would have told you.

I know, it's just when you pulled up--

Hi. Nothing?

One of the goats is gone, too.

- One of the goats is gone... - Something is going on.

Donald Kelly called this morning asking if we'd seen Duke.

Dog never leaves Claire's side.

All of a sudden, this morning on a walk,

he just starts getting squirrelly and runs off?

- Hmm. - Dad.

Are we worried, like, for real?

Are we worried? No. We are not worried.

We are not worried. Arlo is hiding,

or he went after a missing goat.

Stupid goats are always going into the woods.

Exactly, then it got dark.

You guys always say if we get lost to stay put.

That's right. Now Arlo is sitting there like a goof,

waiting for someone to come find him.

- Okay? - Okay.

Take Nicholas, go into the woods around the back.

We'll go around the front, meet somewhere in the middle.

- Aye-aye, captain. - Aye-aye.

Come on, let's go find that gremlin.

Yup...

Hello?

Is anyone out there?

I... I think I'm lost.

Gunshot... calmate...

Gunshot... Calmate... men-strange... murder-maker.

Ella esta mintiendo. Ella esta mintiendo!

Murder-maker. Run-ran-hide.

Calmate... gunshot... men-strange... murder-maker!

Ella esta mintiendo! Murder-maker.

Murder-maker!

Arlo!

Arlo!

Come on, Arlo, enough is enough.

Your family's awesome.

Are you kidding?

Arlo?

- Your dad's funny. - My dad thinks he's funny.

Okay, well, your mom... I mean, that was some scary shit.

But now it's just not.

- And what she's doing with Scout, it's-- - Yeah, she's great...

with animals.

Your grandma's way cool too.

Smokes a ton of pot.

Even cooler.

- It's for pain and stuff. - Oh.

She's got multiple sclerosis. Her hands never stop shaking.

No, I, um, I saw that. Yeah.

My parents, they fight a lot. My mom's always on me about something.

And now, my stupid brother has vanished, so.

So, yeah, totally awesome.

Do you wanna hear a joke?

- No. - Oh...

- Okay, fine, go ahead. - Okay, so,

what do you call a banana eating a banana?

What?

"Canabananalism."

- What are you doing? - What? What do you mean?

"Your family's so awesome..." "Wanna hear a joke..."

What's...

Arlo? You out there?

- What was that? Shh, shh... - What was what?

Is that Arlo?

Doesn't sound like Arlo.

It's called the sternocephalicus.

But the muscle, it's not what worries me.

If that thing is long enough, it could have

nicked the jugular, the carotid.

- Pull it out and... - Yes.

There's no getting around it, though.

I'm gonna need you to hold his head real good this time, okay?

All right. Nice and easy.

Nice and easy.

- Shh.

Okay. Three, two, one.

- Hold tight.

Shh.

Okay... just a little blood.

Okay.

Okay.

All right, you're gonna be just fine.

He's gonna be just fine.

You okay?

This bright-side situation we got goin' on here all of a sudden...

Whew!

You're all right. Nice and easy.

Arlo!

Arlo!

Did you see the look Maggie gave me?

Maggie didn't give you a look. She knows what happened,

but doesn't know who it happened with.

Okay, well, it's only a matter of time.

Okay...

Arlo!

Yeah, I'd be really worried if this was my first rodeo,

but... but this was before Arlo was born, actually.

Maggie's usually at her best when bad things happen.

She takes control and does what needs to be done.

I know. Ruben's the same way. He's a man on a mission.

Yeah, but not this time.

Maggie couldn't find Meryl anywhere. Nowhere.

Not-not the barn, not the hayloft

where I built this little table and chairs

for her to have her tea parties. Not the clinic.

Checked every cupboard and closet in the house.

Up here, down the driveway. Nothing.

Nothing.

Then I come home from work and I-I...

I'd never seen Maggie like that.

I mean, she was paralyzed, frozen.

Could barely speak. She just...

just sat there shivering.

Where was Meryl?

In the fucking oven.

- In the oven? - Yeah.

Yeah, we read her Hansel and Gretel.

The witch wants to bake them, you know?

So Mer climbed in just to see if she could fit,

and... [whistles] ...somehow closed the door, too.

She wanted us to come find her but the door was too heavy

and she got stuck.

Good Lord.

Yeah, no way out. So what does she do?

Kid falls asleep.

And we didn't find her until we come into the kitchen to wait for the police.

God, it was so scary.

Kids...

They're just so stupid.

They're stupid.

I mean, I love 'em both so much it hurts, but...

Why am I telling you this right now?

'Cause you really are worried.

- Yeah, I guess I am. - Yeah.

And you love your kids.

- Of course, more than anything. - Mm-hmm.

And you love Maggie too.

- We found the Kellys' dog. - And we found Mr. Goat too.

- You guys okay? - Yeah.

- Good, good, good.

What is that?

Okay. Hey, guys?

Everyone back to the house right now.

Keep going. Go, go, go.

- Did you find him? - No, but I will.

What does that mean?

Hey. Where are you going?

Meryl, what are you doing with the goat?

I found him in the woods. Dad?

Yeah?

Duke!

Duke!

Did you happen to see our son, Arlo?

No, we're just out looking for our dog. Why?

How long's your son been missing?

An hour, tops.

James, what are you doing with the bat?

We saw a coyote. At least I think it was a coyote, I'm not sure.

Whatever it was, there was something wrong with it.

That's why we're here.

That wasn't a coyote you saw.

It was a dog. A big one.

No collar, nothing.

The way he was eyeballin' us...

- We think he was rabid or something. - Yeah.

Growlin', hackles up. We thought for sure

the bastard was gonna lunge, then he took off.

You got kids.

Wanted to make sure you had a heads-up.

Jesus Christ, man. What are you doing?

Hey, if it were my kid...

- It's not your kid. - Did you not hear what I just said?

Yeah, I heard you loud and clear.

There's a rabid dog. Getting ready to play softball?

You're getting ready to drop into a fucking war zone.

How about you just show me where you saw the dog, and I'll take care of it.

James! Oh my God.

Arlo!

Arlo...

- Arlo! What happened? Oh my God.

Maggie, his arms.

- Oh my God. - Those look like finger marks.

Like-- Like someone grabbed him.

Hey. Hey... Who did this to you?

Buzz-goat, wasp-find... men-strange, murder-maker...

Esta mintiendo! Run-ran-hide! Run-ran-hide!

Buzz-goat, wasp-find... men-strange, murder-maker...

- Ella esta mintiendo! - It's okay.

Run-ran-hide! Run-ran-hide!

Buzz-goat, wasp-find... men-strange, murder-maker...

ella está mintiendo.

Men-strange, murder-maker! Ella está mintiendo...

Run-ran-hide! Run-ran-hide!

Oh, my God... Arlo! Arlo? Okay.

Oh my God! Oh my God...

¿Hola?

¿Quien es?

Is someone there?

Ayudame, por favor.

Ayudame!

Please...

help me.

♪ Sit beside the breakfast table ♪

♪ Think about your troubles ♪

♪ Pour yourself a cup of tea ♪

♪ Then think about the bubbles ♪

♪ You can take your teardrops ♪

♪ And drop 'em in a teacup ♪

♪ Take 'em down to the riverside ♪

♪ And throw 'em over the side ♪

♪ To be swept up by a current ♪

♪ Then taken to the ocean ♪

♪ To be eaten by some fishes ♪

♪ Who were eaten by some fishes ♪

♪ And swallowed by a whale ♪

♪ Who grew so old ♪

♪ He decomposed ♪

♪ Doo ♪

♪ He died and left his body ♪

♪ To the bottom of the ocean ♪

♪ Now everybody knows ♪

♪ That when a body decomposes ♪

♪ The basic elements ♪

♪ Are given back to the ocean ♪

♪ And the sea does what it oughta ♪

♪ And soon there's salty water ♪

♪ Not too good for drinking ♪

♪ 'Cause it tastes just like a teardrop ♪

♪ So we run it through a filter ♪

♪ It comes out from a faucet ♪

♪ And it pours into a teapot ♪

♪ Which is just about to bubble ♪

♪ Now ♪

♪ Think about your troubles ♪

♪ Ah ♪

♪ Oh ♪

♪ Ah ♪

♪ Ah ♪

♪ Ah ♪