All language subtitles for South.Park.S05E06.Cartmanland.1080p.HMAX.WEB-DL.DD5.1.H.264-CtrlHD_track3_[eng]

af Afrikaans
ak Akan
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bem Bemba
bn Bengali
bh Bihari
bs Bosnian
br Breton
bg Bulgarian
km Cambodian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
chr Cherokee
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch
en English
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
ee Ewe
fo Faroese
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gaa Ga
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
gn Guarani
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ia Interlingua
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
rw Kinyarwanda
rn Kirundi
kg Kongo
ko Korean
kri Krio (Sierra Leone)
ku Kurdish
ckb Kurdish (Soranî)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Laothian
la Latin
lv Latvian
ln Lingala
lt Lithuanian
loz Lozi
lg Luganda
ach Luo
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mfe Mauritian Creole
mo Moldavian
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
sr-ME Montenegrin
ne Nepali
pcm Nigerian Pidgin
nso Northern Sotho
no Norwegian
nn Norwegian (Nynorsk)
oc Occitan
or Oriya
om Oromo
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt-BR Portuguese (Brazil)
pt Portuguese (Portugal)
pa Punjabi
qu Quechua
ro Romanian
rm Romansh
nyn Runyakitara
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
sh Serbo-Croatian
st Sesotho
tn Setswana
crs Seychellois Creole
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhalese
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
es-419 Spanish (Latin American)
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
tt Tatar
te Telugu
th Thai
ti Tigrinya
to Tonga
lua Tshiluba
tum Tumbuka
tr Turkish
tk Turkmen
tw Twi
ug Uighur
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
wo Wolof
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:12,034 --> 00:00:13,493 ♪ I'm going down to South Park ♪ 2 00:00:13,618 --> 00:00:15,537 ♪ Gonna have myself a time ♪ 3 00:00:15,662 --> 00:00:17,164 Both: ♪ Friendly faces everywhere ♪ 4 00:00:17,289 --> 00:00:18,999 ♪ Humble folks without temptation ♪ 5 00:00:19,124 --> 00:00:20,268 ♪ I'm going down to South Park ♪ 6 00:00:20,292 --> 00:00:22,210 ♪ Gonna leave my woes behind ♪ 7 00:00:22,335 --> 00:00:23,920 ♪ Ample parking day or night ♪ 8 00:00:24,046 --> 00:00:25,589 ♪ People spouting "howdy neighbor" ♪ 9 00:00:25,714 --> 00:00:27,007 ♪ Headin' on up to South Park ♪ 10 00:00:27,132 --> 00:00:27,966 ♪ Gonna see if I can't unwind ♪ 11 00:00:28,091 --> 00:00:28,967 Westside. 12 00:00:29,092 --> 00:00:32,054 ♪ [muffled] ♪ 13 00:00:32,179 --> 00:00:33,346 ♪ Come on down to South Park ♪ 14 00:00:33,472 --> 00:00:35,015 ♪ And meet some friends of mine ♪ 15 00:00:36,682 --> 00:00:38,308 And so it is with heavy hearts 16 00:00:38,434 --> 00:00:41,478 that we say good bye to Mabel Louise Cartman. 17 00:00:41,603 --> 00:00:44,023 She was a good woman, a community leader, 18 00:00:44,148 --> 00:00:47,401 a caring wife, providing mother, 19 00:00:47,526 --> 00:00:50,571 and a loving grandmother. 20 00:00:50,696 --> 00:00:52,156 Mom, it's 3:30. 21 00:00:52,281 --> 00:00:53,466 This is taking up my whole Saturday. 22 00:00:53,490 --> 00:00:55,159 Shh, pumpkin, it's almost over. 23 00:00:55,284 --> 00:00:57,137 Why couldn't the funeral have been on a school day? 24 00:00:57,161 --> 00:00:59,413 And now let us bow our heads in a moment of silence 25 00:00:59,538 --> 00:01:03,125 and reflect on how Mabel touched our lives. 26 00:01:03,250 --> 00:01:05,210 God, she didn't take this long to die. 27 00:01:05,335 --> 00:01:08,088 And now we release the doves to symbolize the Lord 28 00:01:08,213 --> 00:01:09,840 taking Mabel into his arms 29 00:01:09,965 --> 00:01:11,425 and giving her everlasting peace. 30 00:01:16,472 --> 00:01:17,723 Peace. 31 00:01:19,349 --> 00:01:21,143 Great. Now can we go? 32 00:01:21,268 --> 00:01:23,288 No, sweetie, we have to tend to some of grandma's business. 33 00:01:23,312 --> 00:01:25,147 Ohh! God damn it! 34 00:01:27,316 --> 00:01:28,585 "And so I leave my stocks and bonds 35 00:01:28,609 --> 00:01:31,070 "worth an estimated $14.12 36 00:01:31,195 --> 00:01:32,946 to be divided amongst my loving family." 37 00:01:33,072 --> 00:01:34,990 Mom, I wanna go home! 38 00:01:35,115 --> 00:01:37,326 In a minute, sweetie. This is important. 39 00:01:37,451 --> 00:01:40,454 "My loving son Stinky, I leave you the house in Nebraska. 40 00:01:40,579 --> 00:01:42,372 Look after it as your father and I did." 41 00:01:42,498 --> 00:01:43,618 Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. 42 00:01:43,665 --> 00:01:45,042 "To my grandson Eric, 43 00:01:45,167 --> 00:01:47,377 "you were always my favorite fat little man, 44 00:01:47,503 --> 00:01:49,338 my perfect round little pudding piler." 45 00:01:49,463 --> 00:01:50,607 Oh God, you have to embarrass me 46 00:01:50,631 --> 00:01:51,507 even in death, Grandma. 47 00:01:51,632 --> 00:01:53,425 "For you, Eric, I leave, 48 00:01:53,550 --> 00:01:57,096 "from my life savings, the sum of $1 million, 49 00:01:57,221 --> 00:01:58,490 to be transferred to you immediately." 50 00:01:58,514 --> 00:02:00,390 Whosa-jigga-what? 51 00:02:00,516 --> 00:02:02,101 A million dollars? 52 00:02:02,226 --> 00:02:04,269 "Eric is the primary benefactor of my estate, 53 00:02:04,394 --> 00:02:06,021 "since it is likely the rest of you 54 00:02:06,146 --> 00:02:07,165 would spend the money on crack." 55 00:02:07,189 --> 00:02:08,982 Oh, my. - That can't be! 56 00:02:09,108 --> 00:02:10,150 Excuse me. 57 00:02:10,275 --> 00:02:13,529 Does this mean I have $1 million? 58 00:02:13,654 --> 00:02:15,322 Yes, Eric, it's yours. 59 00:02:15,447 --> 00:02:16,782 No way. You don't understand. 60 00:02:16,907 --> 00:02:18,075 Since I was two years old, 61 00:02:18,200 --> 00:02:20,369 it has been my dream to have $1 million. 62 00:02:20,494 --> 00:02:22,412 And now you do. 63 00:02:22,538 --> 00:02:24,957 Oh. 64 00:02:25,082 --> 00:02:27,793 [screaming] 65 00:02:31,547 --> 00:02:34,258 [screaming continues] 66 00:02:36,552 --> 00:02:38,428 There you are, Jennifer Lopez! 67 00:02:38,554 --> 00:02:40,264 You've been most uncooperative, Miss Lopez. 68 00:02:40,389 --> 00:02:41,890 No, please! 69 00:02:42,015 --> 00:02:43,576 I promise I'll never make another album or movie. 70 00:02:43,600 --> 00:02:44,960 It's too late for that, Miss Lopez. 71 00:02:45,060 --> 00:02:46,060 Have mercy! 72 00:02:48,313 --> 00:02:50,274 Pop! 73 00:02:50,399 --> 00:02:52,067 Yeah-ha! - Awesome! 74 00:02:52,192 --> 00:02:57,156 You guys, you guys! [mumbling] 75 00:02:57,281 --> 00:02:58,866 Why? 76 00:02:58,991 --> 00:03:02,536 Because! [mumbling] 77 00:03:02,661 --> 00:03:04,121 Nuh-uh. 78 00:03:04,246 --> 00:03:05,831 No, swear to God, it's true... 79 00:03:05,956 --> 00:03:08,041 You better not be lying, Kenny. 80 00:03:10,002 --> 00:03:14,756 999,400... 999,500... 81 00:03:14,882 --> 00:03:16,442 Damn, Dan, I've never seen that much cash. 82 00:03:16,466 --> 00:03:17,885 Me neither. 83 00:03:18,010 --> 00:03:21,930 999,900... 1 million. 84 00:03:22,055 --> 00:03:24,183 Look at it. Look at it, Mother. 85 00:03:24,308 --> 00:03:25,475 See how the light reflects 86 00:03:25,601 --> 00:03:27,269 the spearmint green from its surface. 87 00:03:27,394 --> 00:03:28,896 Eric, that is a lot of money. 88 00:03:29,021 --> 00:03:30,456 Don't you think you should keep it in the bank 89 00:03:30,480 --> 00:03:32,107 instead of at your house? 90 00:03:32,232 --> 00:03:33,376 I'm not keeping it, Mr. Garrison. 91 00:03:33,400 --> 00:03:35,068 I'm spending it. - On what? 92 00:03:35,194 --> 00:03:36,194 On my dream, 93 00:03:36,278 --> 00:03:37,558 on the one thing that I've wanted 94 00:03:37,654 --> 00:03:39,239 ever since I can remember. 95 00:03:43,952 --> 00:03:45,552 Excuse me, son. I'm an investment broker. 96 00:03:45,621 --> 00:03:46,955 I can help you invest that money. 97 00:03:47,080 --> 00:03:48,457 Nuh-uh, I'm spending it. 98 00:03:48,582 --> 00:03:51,460 Eric, God could sure use that money for a bigger church. 99 00:03:51,585 --> 00:03:54,087 I think God has plenty of money. 100 00:03:54,213 --> 00:03:55,839 What the hell are you doing, fat-ass? 101 00:03:55,964 --> 00:03:58,425 Not much, just taking my $1 million out of the bank. 102 00:03:58,550 --> 00:04:00,344 Oh, my God. 103 00:04:00,469 --> 00:04:02,179 Kenny wasn't lying. 104 00:04:02,304 --> 00:04:04,449 Would you mind stepping aside? I've got a purchase to make. 105 00:04:04,473 --> 00:04:06,201 Dude, can you loan me 20 bucks for a new jacket? 106 00:04:06,225 --> 00:04:08,477 Ha! If you need money, you can get a job, Stan! 107 00:04:08,602 --> 00:04:10,938 No freeloaders are gonna take my hard-earned cash. 108 00:04:11,063 --> 00:04:12,540 Your grandma left it to you. You didn't earn it! 109 00:04:12,564 --> 00:04:14,233 Didn't earn it? 110 00:04:14,358 --> 00:04:16,169 What about all the years I spent making grandma like me, 111 00:04:16,193 --> 00:04:18,111 all the wet, spit-filled kisses I put up with, 112 00:04:18,237 --> 00:04:20,197 the constant smell of aspirin and pee? 113 00:04:20,322 --> 00:04:22,322 Don't tell me I didn't earn it, you son of a bitch! 114 00:04:24,117 --> 00:04:26,870 No, no, this is impossible. 115 00:04:26,995 --> 00:04:28,163 Yeah, it's unbelievable. 116 00:04:28,288 --> 00:04:30,123 No, I mean this isn't impossible, Stan. 117 00:04:30,249 --> 00:04:31,969 Cartman is the biggest asshole in the world. 118 00:04:32,042 --> 00:04:33,882 How is it that God gives him a million dollars? 119 00:04:33,961 --> 00:04:36,147 Come on, we got to see what Cartman is doing with his money. 120 00:04:36,171 --> 00:04:37,422 Why? How could you do this? 121 00:04:37,547 --> 00:04:39,216 There are people starving in Alabama, 122 00:04:39,341 --> 00:04:41,301 and you give Cartman a million dollars? 123 00:04:43,679 --> 00:04:46,807 And if we can just get you to sign here and here. 124 00:04:46,932 --> 00:04:48,493 You're sure this is what you want, sweetie? 125 00:04:48,517 --> 00:04:50,560 My own amusement park, Mother, I'm sure. 126 00:04:50,686 --> 00:04:52,771 And now you just sign here, Mr. Foon. 127 00:04:55,190 --> 00:04:56,066 I can't do it. 128 00:04:56,191 --> 00:04:57,359 What? - What? 129 00:04:57,484 --> 00:05:00,070 I can't sell this poor kid my park. 130 00:05:00,195 --> 00:05:02,155 Look, I haven't been honest with you. 131 00:05:02,281 --> 00:05:04,116 The park hasn't been doing great business. 132 00:05:04,241 --> 00:05:06,076 Frank, shh. - It ain't right, Chris. 133 00:05:06,201 --> 00:05:08,078 The truth is, the park is a financial flop. 134 00:05:08,203 --> 00:05:09,514 I haven't turned a profit in years 135 00:05:09,538 --> 00:05:11,123 because I can't keep attendance up. 136 00:05:11,248 --> 00:05:13,184 Oh, but I'm not buying the park to get people to come. 137 00:05:13,208 --> 00:05:14,835 You--you're not? 138 00:05:14,960 --> 00:05:16,086 No, no, no. 139 00:05:16,211 --> 00:05:19,089 I'm buying it to keep people out! 140 00:05:19,214 --> 00:05:20,841 Don't you see? 141 00:05:20,966 --> 00:05:23,027 Forever it has been my dream to have my very own theme park 142 00:05:23,051 --> 00:05:25,804 so that I could be alone in it all day, every day. 143 00:05:25,929 --> 00:05:28,807 I love theme parks, but the lines... 144 00:05:28,932 --> 00:05:30,434 Everywhere you go-- people, crowds. 145 00:05:30,559 --> 00:05:31,935 The rides are great, 146 00:05:32,060 --> 00:05:34,021 but all the lines, lines, lines! 147 00:05:34,146 --> 00:05:35,939 If there's one thing I hate, 148 00:05:36,064 --> 00:05:41,278 all the lines, lines, lines, lines! 149 00:05:41,403 --> 00:05:43,280 And then there get to be so many people 150 00:05:43,405 --> 00:05:44,948 that they make "fast pass." 151 00:05:45,073 --> 00:05:47,117 So then there's lines for fast pass. 152 00:05:47,242 --> 00:05:50,078 You stand in line to get a ticket to stand in line later. 153 00:05:50,203 --> 00:05:51,514 Then there's lines for the bathrooms, 154 00:05:51,538 --> 00:05:52,538 lines for the drinks, 155 00:05:52,622 --> 00:05:53,999 lines for kartankulas 156 00:05:54,124 --> 00:05:56,710 and rare kartankula plinks. 157 00:05:59,171 --> 00:06:01,840 And so you see, this park is for me. 158 00:06:01,965 --> 00:06:03,967 Nobody else will be allowed in. 159 00:06:04,092 --> 00:06:06,303 Oh, well, then I guess I don't feel bad. 160 00:06:06,428 --> 00:06:09,431 Mr. Cartman, congratulations. The theme park is yours. 161 00:06:09,556 --> 00:06:11,975 Gentlemen, I thank you. 162 00:06:14,853 --> 00:06:15,853 Kyle? 163 00:06:18,315 --> 00:06:19,483 Dude, what are you doing here? 164 00:06:19,608 --> 00:06:21,234 Everybody's looking for you. 165 00:06:21,360 --> 00:06:22,944 Kyle? 166 00:06:23,070 --> 00:06:24,964 Do you know what happened to me this morning, Stan? 167 00:06:24,988 --> 00:06:28,283 This morning I woke up and felt a sharp pain in my ass. 168 00:06:28,408 --> 00:06:31,203 I felt down there and found this big, sore lump... 169 00:06:31,328 --> 00:06:33,288 On my ass, Stan. 170 00:06:33,413 --> 00:06:35,123 I couldn't even sit down, so... 171 00:06:35,248 --> 00:06:37,376 I had to tell my mother, which was humiliating. 172 00:06:37,501 --> 00:06:40,087 She took me to the doctor, which was more humiliating, 173 00:06:40,212 --> 00:06:43,757 and he told me... I have a hemorrhoid. 174 00:06:43,882 --> 00:06:46,259 It's like an infected blood vessel on your ass. 175 00:06:46,385 --> 00:06:49,471 I'm nine years old, and I have a hemorrhoid, Stan. 176 00:06:49,596 --> 00:06:50,889 I have a hemorrhoid, 177 00:06:51,014 --> 00:06:54,226 and Cartman has his own theme park. 178 00:06:54,351 --> 00:06:56,478 Kyle, I understand what you mean, but-- 179 00:06:56,603 --> 00:06:58,271 Do you? Do you, Stan? 180 00:06:58,397 --> 00:07:00,816 Because all my life I was raised to believe in Jehovah, 181 00:07:00,941 --> 00:07:02,627 to believe that we should all behave a certain way 182 00:07:02,651 --> 00:07:04,069 and good things will come to us. 183 00:07:04,194 --> 00:07:06,339 I make mistakes, but every week I try to better myself. 184 00:07:06,363 --> 00:07:08,865 I'm always saying, "you know, I learned something today." 185 00:07:08,990 --> 00:07:10,551 And what does this so-called God give me in return? 186 00:07:10,575 --> 00:07:12,244 A hemorrhoid. 187 00:07:12,369 --> 00:07:14,121 It doesn't make sense. What is your logic? 188 00:07:14,246 --> 00:07:15,956 Ow. 189 00:07:16,081 --> 00:07:18,041 Look, Cartman, he thinks he's gonna be happy 190 00:07:18,166 --> 00:07:19,477 because he has his own amusement park, 191 00:07:19,501 --> 00:07:21,461 but he's gonna find out that without other people, 192 00:07:21,503 --> 00:07:23,088 the rides are totally lame. 193 00:07:23,213 --> 00:07:25,053 I mean, who could really have fun by themselves 194 00:07:25,132 --> 00:07:26,299 at a theme park? 195 00:07:26,425 --> 00:07:27,801 I'll bet he's sick of it already. 196 00:07:27,926 --> 00:07:31,388 Yes! Yes! 197 00:07:31,513 --> 00:07:34,474 Awesome! 198 00:07:34,599 --> 00:07:36,017 Ho! Ho! 199 00:07:36,143 --> 00:07:39,271 Sweet, yes! 200 00:07:39,396 --> 00:07:41,374 Keep your arms and legs inside the vehicle at all times. 201 00:07:41,398 --> 00:07:42,834 Make sure your seat belt is fastened. 202 00:07:42,858 --> 00:07:44,818 Enjoy the mine shaft! 203 00:07:44,943 --> 00:07:47,446 Heh, heh, heh-heh. 204 00:07:47,571 --> 00:07:51,032 Yes! Yes! 205 00:07:51,158 --> 00:07:54,786 Oh, cool! 206 00:07:54,911 --> 00:07:56,037 Oh, look how much fun I had. 207 00:07:58,206 --> 00:07:59,416 Whoa! Heh, heh, heh. 208 00:07:59,541 --> 00:08:01,543 Waa! Heh, heh. 209 00:08:01,668 --> 00:08:03,420 Whoa! Heh, heh, heh. 210 00:08:03,545 --> 00:08:07,757 Ooh, Adventure Island. Check it out. Awesome! 211 00:08:07,883 --> 00:08:11,219 Whoo-hoo! Yeah! 212 00:08:11,344 --> 00:08:14,764 [crying] I'm so happy. 213 00:08:14,890 --> 00:08:18,018 I'm so happy! 214 00:08:20,938 --> 00:08:22,082 Oh, hey, dude, Terrance & Phillip 215 00:08:22,106 --> 00:08:23,399 is just about to start. 216 00:08:23,524 --> 00:08:23,983 Great. - What's that? 217 00:08:24,108 --> 00:08:25,776 it's my seat ring. 218 00:08:25,901 --> 00:08:27,504 I have to sit on it because of my hemorrhoid. 219 00:08:27,528 --> 00:08:28,821 Ow. - Heh, heh. Sorry. 220 00:08:28,946 --> 00:08:30,826 So how are things going at Cartman's theme park? 221 00:08:30,864 --> 00:08:32,283 Dude, just forget about it. 222 00:08:32,408 --> 00:08:33,593 We can't let him get to us, or he wins. 223 00:08:33,617 --> 00:08:34,827 I guess you're right. 224 00:08:34,952 --> 00:08:37,454 Hey, everybody check out the all-new Cartmanland! 225 00:08:37,579 --> 00:08:39,248 It's our Grand Opening! 226 00:08:39,373 --> 00:08:41,417 Cartmanland has over 100 fabulous rides, 227 00:08:41,542 --> 00:08:44,211 six roller coasters, and tons of great surprises. 228 00:08:44,336 --> 00:08:47,339 And the best part is, you can't come! 229 00:08:47,464 --> 00:08:49,341 That's right, because at Cartmanland, 230 00:08:49,466 --> 00:08:51,719 Only I, Eric Cartman, can get in. 231 00:08:51,844 --> 00:08:54,305 That means only I can ride the all-new Tornado Twister, 232 00:08:54,430 --> 00:08:56,974 a roller coaster that splashes into water--wow! 233 00:08:57,099 --> 00:08:59,351 It's the greatest amusement park in the Colorado area. 234 00:08:59,476 --> 00:09:02,021 And nobody can go, especially Stan and Kyle! 235 00:09:02,146 --> 00:09:03,522 Ha, ha, ha! 236 00:09:03,647 --> 00:09:05,399 So come on down to Cartmanland now, 237 00:09:05,524 --> 00:09:06,960 but don't plan on getting past the parking lot, 238 00:09:06,984 --> 00:09:08,819 'Cause remember: 239 00:09:08,944 --> 00:09:11,363 ♪ So much to do at Cartmanland but you can't come ♪ 240 00:09:11,488 --> 00:09:13,532 Especially you, Stan and Kyle. 241 00:09:13,657 --> 00:09:14,737 That does it! Come on, dude. 242 00:09:14,825 --> 00:09:16,368 Where are we going? 243 00:09:16,493 --> 00:09:17,846 We're getting into that fat-ass's park, 244 00:09:17,870 --> 00:09:18,910 whether he likes it or not. 245 00:09:22,041 --> 00:09:23,041 Whoa! Heh, heh. 246 00:09:23,125 --> 00:09:24,376 Whoa. 247 00:09:24,501 --> 00:09:25,836 Whoa! Heh, heh, heh. 248 00:09:25,961 --> 00:09:27,755 Oh, man, that was awesome! 249 00:09:27,880 --> 00:09:29,923 That one part with the spider that dropped on you-- 250 00:09:30,049 --> 00:09:31,809 oh, man, that totally got me; that was sweet. 251 00:09:31,842 --> 00:09:35,054 Help! Help! Help! Oh, that hurts! 252 00:09:35,179 --> 00:09:36,555 Help! Oh, that hurts! 253 00:09:36,680 --> 00:09:38,057 You sons of bitches! 254 00:09:38,182 --> 00:09:39,600 Come on, dude! 255 00:09:39,725 --> 00:09:41,769 Oh God, I popped it! Oh, it hurts! 256 00:09:41,894 --> 00:09:42,912 What the hell are you doing? 257 00:09:42,936 --> 00:09:44,313 Oh crap. 258 00:09:44,438 --> 00:09:45,814 Oh God, get me off of here! 259 00:09:45,939 --> 00:09:48,067 Dude! 260 00:09:48,192 --> 00:09:49,735 Stan, I have to go home. 261 00:09:49,860 --> 00:09:52,279 I need my cream. I need my cream! 262 00:09:52,404 --> 00:09:53,405 Alright, let's go. 263 00:09:53,530 --> 00:09:54,865 That's right. You stay out! 264 00:09:54,990 --> 00:09:56,990 You can't keep us out forever, you fucking fat-ass! 265 00:09:57,034 --> 00:09:58,887 We'll be back as soon as Kyle's hemorrhoid is better. 266 00:09:58,911 --> 00:10:00,412 My life can't get any worse! 267 00:10:00,537 --> 00:10:01,580 You'll see. We'll get in. 268 00:10:04,625 --> 00:10:05,751 Alright, so listen. 269 00:10:05,876 --> 00:10:07,103 All I want you to do is keep anybody out 270 00:10:07,127 --> 00:10:08,587 who tries to get in here. 271 00:10:08,712 --> 00:10:10,112 If you see anybody on my proper-tuh, 272 00:10:10,214 --> 00:10:12,758 especially Stan and Kyle, you are to shoot on sight. 273 00:10:12,883 --> 00:10:14,635 So what does this job pay? 274 00:10:14,760 --> 00:10:15,928 Alright, now this is very hard 275 00:10:16,053 --> 00:10:17,429 for me to do, you understand. 276 00:10:17,554 --> 00:10:19,032 But in return for you working security, 277 00:10:19,056 --> 00:10:20,933 I'll let you ride two rides a day, 278 00:10:21,058 --> 00:10:23,602 but only two rides and only if I'm not on them. 279 00:10:23,727 --> 00:10:28,607 Uh, I'm afraid I don't really like rides. 280 00:10:28,732 --> 00:10:30,901 But you can ride anything you want, 281 00:10:31,026 --> 00:10:33,320 and you don't have to wait in line. 282 00:10:33,445 --> 00:10:34,822 I'm not interested. 283 00:10:34,947 --> 00:10:36,824 Dude, are you from Mars or something? 284 00:10:36,949 --> 00:10:38,659 Any ride you want, no lines. 285 00:10:38,784 --> 00:10:41,912 if you need security, I need a cash salary. 286 00:10:42,037 --> 00:10:43,038 But I don't have any cash. 287 00:10:43,163 --> 00:10:44,540 I spent everything on this park. 288 00:10:44,665 --> 00:10:45,892 Well, look, why don't you just let 289 00:10:45,916 --> 00:10:47,751 a couple of people in each day? 290 00:10:47,876 --> 00:10:50,295 Every day you can just let two people in, 291 00:10:50,421 --> 00:10:52,714 charge $29.95 for tickets, 292 00:10:52,840 --> 00:10:55,801 and then you can use that to pay my daily salary. 293 00:10:55,926 --> 00:10:57,928 Ugh, two people! 294 00:10:58,053 --> 00:11:00,305 This place is huge. You'll never notice two people. 295 00:11:00,431 --> 00:11:02,307 And then you'll have security for your park. 296 00:11:02,433 --> 00:11:03,809 Well, alright, God damn it. 297 00:11:03,934 --> 00:11:05,602 I'll open the park to two people each day. 298 00:11:05,727 --> 00:11:07,914 But remember, anybody else you see trespassing in the park... 299 00:11:07,938 --> 00:11:10,149 I will shoot on sight. - Sweet. 300 00:11:12,484 --> 00:11:13,986 You're a very lucky little boy. 301 00:11:14,111 --> 00:11:16,071 I've never seen a hemorrhoid so infected. 302 00:11:16,196 --> 00:11:17,573 It could've killed you. 303 00:11:17,698 --> 00:11:19,324 Lucky. 304 00:11:19,450 --> 00:11:21,770 Oh, look, Kyle, your little friend Stan is here to see you. 305 00:11:21,869 --> 00:11:23,620 Dude, you okay? - Oh, I'm swell, Stan. 306 00:11:23,745 --> 00:11:25,598 I popped my hemorrhoid trying to climb the fence 307 00:11:25,622 --> 00:11:26,975 into Cartmanland, and it got infected. 308 00:11:26,999 --> 00:11:28,500 I really need to go to the bathroom, 309 00:11:28,625 --> 00:11:29,769 but if I do, it will pop again, 310 00:11:29,793 --> 00:11:30,895 and the pain will make me pass out. 311 00:11:30,919 --> 00:11:32,379 How are you? 312 00:11:32,504 --> 00:11:33,815 Well, I found out that Cartman's letting 313 00:11:33,839 --> 00:11:35,479 a few people each day into his theme park. 314 00:11:35,591 --> 00:11:37,926 I was thinking we could put on disguises and get in. 315 00:11:38,051 --> 00:11:40,679 I'm afraid Kyle can't ride any amusement park rides 316 00:11:40,804 --> 00:11:43,432 for over a year because of his horrible hemorrhoid. 317 00:11:43,557 --> 00:11:45,267 Jesus. 318 00:11:45,392 --> 00:11:47,412 But it's okay, Stan, because I finally figured it out. 319 00:11:47,436 --> 00:11:48,687 You see, if someone like Cartman 320 00:11:48,812 --> 00:11:50,623 can get a million dollars and his own theme park, 321 00:11:50,647 --> 00:11:53,484 then there is no God; there's no God, dude. 322 00:11:53,609 --> 00:11:54,902 Kyle, don't say such things! 323 00:11:55,027 --> 00:11:56,695 Why? Why, Mom? 324 00:11:56,820 --> 00:11:58,673 Because if I do, something bad will happen to me? 325 00:11:58,697 --> 00:12:00,457 Because if I do, your God might not shower me 326 00:12:00,491 --> 00:12:02,051 with his blessings of infected hemorrhoids? 327 00:12:02,075 --> 00:12:03,952 Kyle, you just don't understand; it's-- 328 00:12:04,077 --> 00:12:05,746 No, I finally do understand! 329 00:12:05,871 --> 00:12:07,748 There is no justice! There is no God! 330 00:12:07,873 --> 00:12:10,792 Do you hear me? I renounce my faith! 331 00:12:12,794 --> 00:12:14,338 Alright, alright, listen up, people. 332 00:12:14,463 --> 00:12:17,049 Cartmanland is open but only to two people each day. 333 00:12:17,174 --> 00:12:18,842 All: Aww! 334 00:12:18,967 --> 00:12:20,445 I've just got to cover my security expenses. 335 00:12:20,469 --> 00:12:21,709 Butters, Clyde, you can come in. 336 00:12:21,762 --> 00:12:23,555 Oh! 337 00:12:23,680 --> 00:12:25,640 The rest of you will just have to try another day. 338 00:12:27,726 --> 00:12:30,354 Hey, one park admission. That'll be $29.95, sir. 339 00:12:30,479 --> 00:12:31,688 Five cents is your change. 340 00:12:31,813 --> 00:12:33,023 Enjoy your stay at Cartmanland. 341 00:12:33,148 --> 00:12:35,275 Oh boy, oh boy! 342 00:12:35,400 --> 00:12:36,777 And enjoy your stay at Cartmanland. 343 00:12:36,902 --> 00:12:38,362 Oh, finally work is over. 344 00:12:38,487 --> 00:12:40,989 Now I can get back to riding my rides. 345 00:12:41,114 --> 00:12:43,242 ♪ Da-da-da I've got my own theme park ♪ 346 00:12:43,367 --> 00:12:44,743 Hmm, what should I go on now? 347 00:12:44,868 --> 00:12:48,413 I know; I'll go on the Haunted Mansion ride again! 348 00:12:48,539 --> 00:12:49,915 ♪ Da-da da da da-da da-da-da ♪ 349 00:12:50,040 --> 00:12:51,583 ♪ Da da- ♪ 350 00:12:51,708 --> 00:12:52,793 What are you doing? 351 00:12:52,918 --> 00:12:54,336 We're in line for the Spook House. 352 00:12:54,461 --> 00:12:55,754 Line? Line? 353 00:12:55,879 --> 00:12:57,756 I hate lines! 354 00:12:57,881 --> 00:12:59,442 Can't you go on something else right now? 355 00:12:59,466 --> 00:13:00,527 We want to see the Spook House. 356 00:13:00,551 --> 00:13:02,553 Well, we paid $29.95. 357 00:13:02,678 --> 00:13:04,030 We should be able to go in the Spook House. 358 00:13:04,054 --> 00:13:05,472 Yeah, but I think it's broke down. 359 00:13:05,597 --> 00:13:06,682 The cars aren't moving. 360 00:13:06,807 --> 00:13:07,808 Alright, alright, hang on. 361 00:13:07,933 --> 00:13:09,017 Security! 362 00:13:09,142 --> 00:13:10,018 [feedback] What? 363 00:13:10,143 --> 00:13:11,395 Oh! Jesus, look, 364 00:13:11,520 --> 00:13:12,539 the Haunted House ride broke down. 365 00:13:12,563 --> 00:13:13,647 I need you to fix it. 366 00:13:13,772 --> 00:13:15,440 Uh, I'm security, not maintenance. 367 00:13:15,566 --> 00:13:16,942 But I don't know how it works. 368 00:13:17,067 --> 00:13:18,711 Your rides are gonna break down every now and then. 369 00:13:18,735 --> 00:13:20,487 You need to hire a maintenance person. 370 00:13:20,612 --> 00:13:21,947 Uh, alright, alright. 371 00:13:22,072 --> 00:13:23,615 I'll let two more people in each day 372 00:13:23,740 --> 00:13:25,450 so I can hire a maintenance person. 373 00:13:28,454 --> 00:13:30,873 Alright, folks, we've had another change in policy. 374 00:13:30,998 --> 00:13:32,309 I've had to hire a maintenance person, 375 00:13:32,333 --> 00:13:33,375 and to pay his salary, 376 00:13:33,500 --> 00:13:36,754 I have to let in two more people a day. 377 00:13:36,879 --> 00:13:38,356 However, the stupid maintenance person 378 00:13:38,380 --> 00:13:40,233 demanded I have food and drinks inside the park, 379 00:13:40,257 --> 00:13:41,857 so now I've had to hire a beverage person 380 00:13:41,967 --> 00:13:43,427 and a cotton candy person, 381 00:13:43,552 --> 00:13:46,305 which means I now have to let eight people come in a day. 382 00:13:46,430 --> 00:13:47,973 But you are to try your best 383 00:13:48,098 --> 00:13:49,850 not to ride any rides that I am on. 384 00:13:49,975 --> 00:13:51,852 Understood? 385 00:13:51,977 --> 00:13:53,145 Alright, let's go. 386 00:13:53,270 --> 00:13:55,773 Timmy! 387 00:13:55,898 --> 00:13:56,982 Wait a minute. Who are you? 388 00:13:57,107 --> 00:13:58,150 Mike Gainer. 389 00:13:58,275 --> 00:14:00,069 Ha, get the hell out of here, Stan! 390 00:14:00,194 --> 00:14:01,487 God damn it, Cartman, let me in! 391 00:14:01,612 --> 00:14:03,340 I thought you said buying a theme park was stupid. 392 00:14:03,364 --> 00:14:04,365 Security! 393 00:14:04,490 --> 00:14:06,116 it is stupid, Cartman. 394 00:14:06,241 --> 00:14:07,969 You made Kyle lose his faith in God, you fat asshole! 395 00:14:07,993 --> 00:14:08,869 Get him out of here. 396 00:14:08,994 --> 00:14:10,454 Move along, sir. 397 00:14:10,579 --> 00:14:12,331 Ah!! This isn't over, Cartman! 398 00:14:12,456 --> 00:14:14,124 Ugh! 399 00:14:14,249 --> 00:14:17,378 Well, now I can finally get back to riding my rides. 400 00:14:19,463 --> 00:14:22,466 Sweet! Yay! 401 00:14:22,591 --> 00:14:25,177 Oh, man, I'm so scared. 402 00:14:25,302 --> 00:14:27,054 Aah! 403 00:14:28,889 --> 00:14:31,058 Ah! Aaah! 404 00:14:31,183 --> 00:14:33,477 Just a little more. There we go. 405 00:14:33,602 --> 00:14:35,312 Hello, Kyle. How's the hemorrhoid today? 406 00:14:35,437 --> 00:14:37,147 Awesome. 407 00:14:37,272 --> 00:14:38,917 Kyle, we want to tell you about the Book of Job. 408 00:14:38,941 --> 00:14:40,317 It's a story from the Bible. 409 00:14:40,442 --> 00:14:42,295 I've had enough of the Bible. What has it gotten me? 410 00:14:42,319 --> 00:14:44,297 Oh, I think you'll see differently after hearing this. 411 00:14:44,321 --> 00:14:45,989 Sit down, Kyle. 412 00:14:46,115 --> 00:14:47,241 Uh, okay. 413 00:14:47,366 --> 00:14:49,743 You see, Job lived in the east of Jordan 414 00:14:49,868 --> 00:14:53,497 a long, long time ago. 415 00:14:53,622 --> 00:14:55,165 Job was a great man. 416 00:14:55,290 --> 00:14:57,084 He was blessed with ten lovely children, 417 00:14:57,209 --> 00:14:59,503 a wonderful wife, and many friends. 418 00:14:59,628 --> 00:15:02,256 he was a godly and a good man and fed the poor. 419 00:15:02,381 --> 00:15:04,216 He was the most upright and honorable of men. 420 00:15:04,341 --> 00:15:05,884 And every day he praised God. 421 00:15:06,009 --> 00:15:07,094 But one day, 422 00:15:07,219 --> 00:15:09,430 Satan went up to heaven and talked to God. 423 00:15:09,555 --> 00:15:10,722 Satan talked to God? 424 00:15:10,848 --> 00:15:11,849 Yes, in the Book of Job, 425 00:15:11,974 --> 00:15:13,142 Satan talks to God. 426 00:15:13,267 --> 00:15:15,727 And God says to Satan, "have you seen Job?" 427 00:15:15,853 --> 00:15:18,897 "He is a great man, and he praises me every day." 428 00:15:19,022 --> 00:15:20,315 But Satan said, "oh, yeah? 429 00:15:20,441 --> 00:15:22,401 "he only praises you because you gave him so much. 430 00:15:22,443 --> 00:15:23,883 "if you didn't give him those things, 431 00:15:23,986 --> 00:15:24,987 he would curse your name." 432 00:15:25,112 --> 00:15:26,196 To which God said, 433 00:15:26,321 --> 00:15:28,198 "Oh, yeah? I'll show you, Satan. 434 00:15:28,323 --> 00:15:29,992 "I'll take those things away from Job, 435 00:15:30,117 --> 00:15:32,035 and he will still praise my name." 436 00:15:32,161 --> 00:15:34,455 And so God had a bunch of barbarians come in 437 00:15:34,580 --> 00:15:36,748 and slaughter Job's ox and donkeys 438 00:15:36,874 --> 00:15:38,250 and murder all his workers. 439 00:15:38,375 --> 00:15:40,252 Then God sent his fireballs from the sky 440 00:15:40,377 --> 00:15:42,754 and killed his sheep and the rest of his employees. 441 00:15:42,880 --> 00:15:45,132 And then, as Job's sons and daughters were eating, 442 00:15:45,257 --> 00:15:46,977 God sent a mighty wind to collapse the house 443 00:15:47,050 --> 00:15:48,427 and crushed and killed them all. 444 00:15:48,552 --> 00:15:49,928 Job was terribly sad, 445 00:15:50,053 --> 00:15:51,281 but he fell to his knees and said, 446 00:15:51,305 --> 00:15:53,432 "the Lord giveth, and the Lord taketh away" 447 00:15:53,557 --> 00:15:55,809 and praised God's name. 448 00:15:55,934 --> 00:15:58,437 So then Job got painful sores all over his body. 449 00:15:58,562 --> 00:16:01,899 he was in terrible, miserable pain all day, every day. 450 00:16:02,024 --> 00:16:03,984 But he still kept his faith. 451 00:16:04,109 --> 00:16:05,194 God said to Satan, 452 00:16:05,319 --> 00:16:07,821 "see? I told you." "Job still praises me." 453 00:16:12,910 --> 00:16:14,161 And that's it? That's the end? 454 00:16:14,286 --> 00:16:15,996 Basically. 455 00:16:16,121 --> 00:16:17,961 That's the most horrible story I've ever heard. 456 00:16:17,998 --> 00:16:20,059 Why would God do such horrible things to a good person 457 00:16:20,083 --> 00:16:22,127 just to prove a point to Satan? 458 00:16:22,252 --> 00:16:25,380 Oh, uh, I don't know. 459 00:16:25,506 --> 00:16:26,798 Then I was right. 460 00:16:26,924 --> 00:16:28,383 Job has all his children killed, 461 00:16:28,509 --> 00:16:30,844 and Michael Bay gets to keep making movies. 462 00:16:30,969 --> 00:16:33,263 There isn't a God. 463 00:16:33,388 --> 00:16:35,974 And since the stupid security guard needs video surveillance, 464 00:16:36,099 --> 00:16:37,535 I have to let in two more people a day 465 00:16:37,559 --> 00:16:39,228 to cover those expenses. 466 00:16:39,353 --> 00:16:41,021 Need to cover the new ticket guy's salary, 467 00:16:41,146 --> 00:16:42,582 so that's three more admissions a day. 468 00:16:42,606 --> 00:16:43,857 Clean-up crew for the bathroom, 469 00:16:43,982 --> 00:16:45,222 money to cover paint and upkeep. 470 00:16:45,275 --> 00:16:46,515 So that's about four admissions, 471 00:16:46,610 --> 00:16:47,810 Bringing the grand total to... 472 00:16:47,903 --> 00:16:49,988 God damn it. 473 00:16:50,113 --> 00:16:53,158 816 people can come into the park today. 474 00:16:53,283 --> 00:16:55,953 [all cheering] 475 00:16:56,078 --> 00:16:57,704 Welcome to Cartmanland. 476 00:16:59,498 --> 00:17:01,500 Isn't he getting any better, Doctor? 477 00:17:01,625 --> 00:17:03,377 I don't understand it. 478 00:17:03,502 --> 00:17:05,796 He's not fighting the infected hemorrhoid at all. 479 00:17:05,921 --> 00:17:07,256 It's like he... 480 00:17:07,381 --> 00:17:09,675 Like he's lost all hope. 481 00:17:09,800 --> 00:17:10,884 Well, if you'll excuse me, 482 00:17:11,009 --> 00:17:12,249 I've got some more tests to run. 483 00:17:12,302 --> 00:17:14,846 And now back to Money Quest on HBC. 484 00:17:14,972 --> 00:17:16,431 Welcome back to Money Quest. 485 00:17:16,557 --> 00:17:18,016 In just over two weeks, 486 00:17:18,141 --> 00:17:19,810 young financial genius Eric Cartman 487 00:17:19,935 --> 00:17:21,186 has managed to turn a theme park 488 00:17:21,311 --> 00:17:23,355 that was seeing less than 100 attendees a day 489 00:17:23,480 --> 00:17:25,983 into a thriving park with attendance in the thousands. 490 00:17:26,108 --> 00:17:27,484 And the way he did it 491 00:17:27,609 --> 00:17:28,836 was with the brilliant "you can't come" technique. 492 00:17:28,860 --> 00:17:30,028 For the first several days, 493 00:17:30,153 --> 00:17:31,506 the young businessman saturated the market 494 00:17:31,530 --> 00:17:33,410 with claims that nobody could get into his park. 495 00:17:33,448 --> 00:17:34,950 It made the public crazy. 496 00:17:35,075 --> 00:17:36,915 So then, weeks later, when he opened the doors, 497 00:17:36,994 --> 00:17:38,263 they were lining up around the block. 498 00:17:38,287 --> 00:17:39,288 Simply amazing. 499 00:17:39,413 --> 00:17:40,831 Well, I think we should point out 500 00:17:40,956 --> 00:17:42,833 that this technique is already being applied 501 00:17:42,958 --> 00:17:44,751 by businesses all over the country. 502 00:17:44,876 --> 00:17:46,962 I'm sorry, we're no longer taking reservations. 503 00:17:47,087 --> 00:17:47,713 Nobody can eat here. 504 00:17:47,838 --> 00:17:50,215 You'll have to leave now. 505 00:17:50,340 --> 00:17:52,092 No, I'm sorry. You can't see this movie. 506 00:17:52,217 --> 00:17:53,802 Nobody can see this movie. 507 00:17:53,927 --> 00:17:55,220 I can't even go in. 508 00:17:55,345 --> 00:17:56,471 Out! 509 00:17:56,597 --> 00:17:58,348 Nobody is allowed into Gracy's anymore! 510 00:17:58,473 --> 00:18:00,225 Get out of here! 511 00:18:00,350 --> 00:18:01,977 Amazing--Eric Cartman is surely 512 00:18:02,102 --> 00:18:04,271 the financial genius of our time. 513 00:18:04,396 --> 00:18:06,732 Uh, uhaah... 514 00:18:06,857 --> 00:18:09,234 Kyle? Kyle? 515 00:18:09,359 --> 00:18:10,902 Get the doctor! 516 00:18:11,028 --> 00:18:13,488 [children shouting and laughing] 517 00:18:19,536 --> 00:18:21,413 God damn it, stop running into me! 518 00:18:40,265 --> 00:18:41,850 Ahh! 519 00:18:44,936 --> 00:18:47,939 Ahhhhh! 520 00:18:48,065 --> 00:18:49,441 My God, look at it, Chris. 521 00:18:49,566 --> 00:18:51,326 That kid completely turned this place around. 522 00:18:51,443 --> 00:18:53,278 He sure did. 523 00:18:53,403 --> 00:18:55,089 Oh, if I could only have a park that worked like this. 524 00:18:55,113 --> 00:18:56,782 Hey, there you are. - Oh, hello. 525 00:18:56,907 --> 00:18:58,367 Congratulations on your success. 526 00:18:58,492 --> 00:19:00,369 Just give me my money back. - What? 527 00:19:00,494 --> 00:19:02,454 I changed my mind. I don't want your stupid park. 528 00:19:02,579 --> 00:19:03,914 But it's doing great. 529 00:19:04,039 --> 00:19:05,916 You call this great? I call it Hell. 530 00:19:06,041 --> 00:19:07,125 Trade me back, God damn it! 531 00:19:07,250 --> 00:19:08,293 You bet! 532 00:19:08,418 --> 00:19:10,045 I'll go get your money right now. 533 00:19:10,170 --> 00:19:11,564 Daddy, Daddy, can we ride the rockets? 534 00:19:11,588 --> 00:19:13,590 God damn it, get the fuck out of my way! 535 00:19:18,972 --> 00:19:20,932 Isn't he responding at all, Doctor? 536 00:19:21,057 --> 00:19:25,353 I'm sorry, your son appears to be losing the battle. 537 00:19:25,479 --> 00:19:29,566 I'm afraid that the hemorrhoid has spread to his lungs. 538 00:19:29,691 --> 00:19:31,693 Normally the body would fight the infection, 539 00:19:31,818 --> 00:19:35,614 but he's--he's just given up on life. 540 00:19:35,739 --> 00:19:37,574 But then are you saying... 541 00:19:37,699 --> 00:19:39,701 there's nothing more I can do. 542 00:19:39,826 --> 00:19:42,704 Little fella's just lost his will to live. 543 00:19:42,829 --> 00:19:45,123 Oh, Kyle! Kyle, you've got to fight! 544 00:19:47,709 --> 00:19:48,960 Good riddance, you stupid park. 545 00:19:49,085 --> 00:19:50,670 You can all kiss my ass! 546 00:19:50,795 --> 00:19:51,963 Excuse me, Eric Cartman? 547 00:19:52,088 --> 00:19:53,548 Yeah. 548 00:19:53,673 --> 00:19:54,833 I'm Frank Gerret with the IRS. 549 00:19:54,925 --> 00:19:56,652 You haven't kept records of your income or payout, 550 00:19:56,676 --> 00:19:58,637 and there's a $500,000 discrepancy. 551 00:19:58,762 --> 00:20:00,388 Seize the assets. 552 00:20:00,514 --> 00:20:01,765 Hey! Hey, that's my money! 553 00:20:01,890 --> 00:20:03,058 There's also the lawsuit 554 00:20:03,183 --> 00:20:04,702 of the little boy who died in your park. 555 00:20:04,726 --> 00:20:06,120 The family's entitled to the rest of this. 556 00:20:06,144 --> 00:20:07,812 What, Kenny? He dies all the time! 557 00:20:07,938 --> 00:20:10,565 You still owe $13,000 more than this, Mr. Cartman. 558 00:20:10,690 --> 00:20:11,858 We'll see you in court. 559 00:20:11,983 --> 00:20:13,860 You can't take my money, God damn it! 560 00:20:13,985 --> 00:20:15,570 We know how well your park is doing. 561 00:20:15,695 --> 00:20:16,905 You'll make it back in no time. 562 00:20:17,030 --> 00:20:19,574 Ah! But I--ah! 563 00:20:19,699 --> 00:20:21,493 Hey, hey, Mr. Foon, I changed my mind. 564 00:20:21,618 --> 00:20:23,286 I need the park to make my money back. 565 00:20:23,411 --> 00:20:25,011 No way, Jose. - But I'm getting sued now. 566 00:20:25,038 --> 00:20:26,915 If I don't have the park, I lose everything. 567 00:20:27,040 --> 00:20:29,584 "I don't care," said Pierre. "I'm from France." 568 00:20:29,709 --> 00:20:31,503 This can't be happening! Aaah! 569 00:20:33,547 --> 00:20:35,048 Kyle, you got to come see! 570 00:20:35,173 --> 00:20:36,716 Kyle's not going to make it, Stanley. 571 00:20:36,841 --> 00:20:38,552 Oh, Gerald! 572 00:20:38,677 --> 00:20:40,029 Doctor, can we wheel Kyle out of here on his bed 573 00:20:40,053 --> 00:20:41,471 with the machines attached? 574 00:20:41,596 --> 00:20:43,515 Well, I suppose it could be rigged, but I... 575 00:20:43,640 --> 00:20:44,640 Then damn it, man, do it! 576 00:20:47,018 --> 00:20:48,603 it isn't fair! 577 00:20:48,728 --> 00:20:50,772 You Goddamn assholes, it isn't fair! 578 00:20:50,897 --> 00:20:52,983 Look, Kyle, look. 579 00:20:53,108 --> 00:20:55,443 You just built me up to knock me down, didn't you? 580 00:20:55,569 --> 00:20:56,945 What about my dreams? 581 00:20:57,070 --> 00:20:58,655 What about my money? 582 00:20:58,780 --> 00:20:59,864 Huh? 583 00:20:59,990 --> 00:21:01,283 I'm so pissed off! 584 00:21:01,408 --> 00:21:02,617 Move along, sir. 585 00:21:02,742 --> 00:21:04,536 You are vandalizing private property. 586 00:21:04,661 --> 00:21:08,373 Hey, you used to work for me! 587 00:21:08,498 --> 00:21:11,793 God damn it, you son of a bitch! 588 00:21:11,918 --> 00:21:13,587 Kyle. - He's coming back. 589 00:21:13,712 --> 00:21:15,297 That's it, baby, that's it. 590 00:21:15,422 --> 00:21:17,340 Oh God damn it, this sucks! 591 00:21:17,465 --> 00:21:18,758 Wait a minute; yes, 592 00:21:18,883 --> 00:21:20,802 the hemorrhoid is going into remission. 593 00:21:20,927 --> 00:21:22,804 Arrrrrr rrr! 594 00:21:22,929 --> 00:21:24,556 Look, Kyle, Cartman is totally miserable, 595 00:21:24,681 --> 00:21:26,033 even more miserable than he was before, 596 00:21:26,057 --> 00:21:27,577 because he's had his dream and lost it. 597 00:21:27,601 --> 00:21:28,893 It's not fair! 598 00:21:29,019 --> 00:21:30,854 It's not fair. I wanna die! 599 00:21:30,979 --> 00:21:34,816 I wanna die! 600 00:21:34,941 --> 00:21:36,735 You are up there. 43425

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.