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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:43,110 --> 00:00:47,342 ♪ Somebody's drivin' my car ♪ 2 00:00:47,415 --> 00:00:51,283 ♪ Somebody's usin' my name ♪ 3 00:00:51,352 --> 00:00:55,517 ♪ Somebody's kissin' my girl ♪ 4 00:00:55,590 --> 00:00:58,717 ♪ So why am I doin' time? ♪ 5 00:00:58,793 --> 00:01:01,023 ♪ This ain't no pink champagne ♪ 6 00:01:01,095 --> 00:01:02,825 ♪ Doin' time ♪ 7 00:01:02,898 --> 00:01:05,093 ♪ This is a ball and chain ♪ 8 00:01:05,167 --> 00:01:06,964 ♪ Doin' time ♪ 9 00:01:07,035 --> 00:01:09,196 ♪ This ain't no swank hotel ♪ 10 00:01:09,271 --> 00:01:11,000 ♪ Doin' time ♪ 11 00:01:11,072 --> 00:01:13,802 ♪ This is a mile-wide hell ♪ 12 00:01:13,875 --> 00:01:15,570 ♪ If it don't fit the crime ♪ 13 00:01:15,644 --> 00:01:19,274 ♪ How come you get off, and I'm doin' time? ♪ 14 00:01:28,558 --> 00:01:32,824 ♪ Somebody bake me a cake ♪ 15 00:01:32,895 --> 00:01:36,831 ♪ You'd better sneak in a file ♪ 16 00:01:36,899 --> 00:01:39,960 ♪ You'd better buy me a judge ♪ 17 00:01:40,037 --> 00:01:44,302 ♪ I've been set up, and I'm doin' time ♪ 18 00:01:44,373 --> 00:01:46,603 ♪ This ain't no pink champagne ♪ 19 00:01:46,676 --> 00:01:48,406 ♪ Doin' time ♪ 20 00:01:48,479 --> 00:01:50,879 ♪ This is a ball and chain ♪ 21 00:01:50,948 --> 00:01:52,540 ♪ Doin' time ♪ 22 00:01:52,616 --> 00:01:54,709 ♪ This ain't no swank hotel ♪ 23 00:01:54,785 --> 00:01:56,582 ♪ Doin' time ♪ 24 00:01:56,653 --> 00:02:00,749 ♪ This is a mile-wide hell ♪ 25 00:02:00,824 --> 00:02:05,091 ♪ Honey, please don't leave me hangin' here ♪ 26 00:02:05,163 --> 00:02:08,063 ♪ Can't you see the end is near? ♪ 27 00:02:08,131 --> 00:02:09,564 ♪ Its a crime ♪ 28 00:02:09,633 --> 00:02:13,502 ♪ You get off, and I'm doin' time ♪ 29 00:02:17,175 --> 00:02:19,939 Bobby, run! 30 00:02:20,011 --> 00:02:22,104 Hold it! Red light! 31 00:02:22,180 --> 00:02:26,140 Green light! Go! 32 00:02:46,438 --> 00:02:48,633 Okay, go! Lets go! 33 00:02:48,707 --> 00:02:50,335 Red light. 34 00:02:50,410 --> 00:02:51,900 Green light. 35 00:03:02,589 --> 00:03:04,751 Did you hear that? 36 00:03:04,825 --> 00:03:08,055 It came from over there. 37 00:03:10,597 --> 00:03:13,761 Locked. 38 00:03:17,505 --> 00:03:19,096 Freeze! 39 00:03:19,172 --> 00:03:22,040 Oh, hi, fellas. 40 00:03:32,119 --> 00:03:33,381 Hi. 41 00:03:33,454 --> 00:03:36,322 Ernest, how many times do I have to tell you 42 00:03:36,391 --> 00:03:37,790 about bank procedure? 43 00:03:39,261 --> 00:03:40,694 Do you realize you could've caused 44 00:03:40,762 --> 00:03:43,458 a serious accident here, perhaps even a blood bath? 45 00:03:44,833 --> 00:03:47,859 This man is a coiled cobra ready to strike 46 00:03:47,936 --> 00:03:49,335 at the slightest irregularity. 47 00:03:49,404 --> 00:03:51,270 I'm sorry, fellas. 48 00:03:51,341 --> 00:03:53,934 I-I just got to workin' on this old polisher switch, 49 00:03:54,009 --> 00:03:55,943 and I just forgot. 50 00:03:56,011 --> 00:03:58,479 Okay. 51 00:03:58,547 --> 00:04:00,038 I'm gonna let you off this time 52 00:04:00,116 --> 00:04:02,346 because you're one of us and you work at the bank. 53 00:04:02,418 --> 00:04:04,682 Yeah. 54 00:04:04,754 --> 00:04:07,052 But I won't always have this job. 55 00:04:07,123 --> 00:04:11,719 Someday I'll be able to wield the financial muscle 56 00:04:11,794 --> 00:04:13,056 of this institution. 57 00:04:13,129 --> 00:04:15,064 I'll be able to move assets around 58 00:04:15,132 --> 00:04:18,157 like chessmen on a financial chessboard. 59 00:04:18,234 --> 00:04:22,262 Someday corporate managers will shudder in their wingtips 60 00:04:22,339 --> 00:04:26,435 at my approach, for I will be... a bank clerk. 61 00:04:26,510 --> 00:04:28,102 Aah! 62 00:04:31,682 --> 00:04:33,274 Ow! Ow! 63 00:04:33,350 --> 00:04:36,251 A- A-A-A-A-Ah! 64 00:04:37,922 --> 00:04:40,117 Aah! Ow! Ow! Ow! 65 00:04:43,027 --> 00:04:44,494 Bob, I'm sick of this police band. 66 00:04:44,561 --> 00:04:46,530 Lets listen to something with kick to it! 67 00:04:47,932 --> 00:04:49,194 Yeah! 68 00:04:49,267 --> 00:04:50,666 Help! Chuck! 69 00:04:50,735 --> 00:04:52,635 Ouch! Aah! 70 00:04:54,539 --> 00:04:55,539 Oh! 71 00:04:59,744 --> 00:05:02,873 It won't turn off! 72 00:05:02,948 --> 00:05:04,108 Help! Help! Help! 73 00:05:04,183 --> 00:05:05,979 Aah! 74 00:05:08,954 --> 00:05:10,649 ♪ Don't make me climb ♪ 75 00:05:10,723 --> 00:05:13,248 ♪ These aren't my tree-climbing shoes ♪ 76 00:05:15,261 --> 00:05:16,261 Stop! Stop! 77 00:05:17,797 --> 00:05:19,162 Huh? 78 00:05:19,231 --> 00:05:20,391 Whoa! 79 00:05:20,466 --> 00:05:24,961 You can't go up the wa-a-a-a-ll! 80 00:05:25,038 --> 00:05:26,471 Ow! Ow! 81 00:05:26,540 --> 00:05:28,973 Aah! 82 00:05:43,223 --> 00:05:45,714 Aah! 83 00:05:54,335 --> 00:05:57,668 ♪... tree-climbing shoes ♪ 84 00:05:58,973 --> 00:05:59,997 Uh... 85 00:06:00,074 --> 00:06:01,564 Huh? 86 00:06:06,581 --> 00:06:09,175 Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh! 87 00:06:11,320 --> 00:06:12,719 Uh! Uh! Uh! 88 00:06:13,322 --> 00:06:14,687 Yaa! Yaa! 89 00:06:19,094 --> 00:06:22,257 Uh! Uh! Uh! Yaa! Yaa! 90 00:06:37,814 --> 00:06:39,610 Aaaaah! 91 00:07:02,172 --> 00:07:04,437 ♪ Anyway, man, monkeys have been up there ♪ 92 00:07:04,508 --> 00:07:06,635 ♪ Yes, put that down! Put that down! ♪ 93 00:07:13,418 --> 00:07:15,351 Ah heh heh heh heh heh. 94 00:07:15,419 --> 00:07:17,284 Huh? 95 00:07:18,355 --> 00:07:19,823 What? 96 00:07:19,891 --> 00:07:20,891 Uh! 97 00:07:22,727 --> 00:07:24,319 My hands are stuck! I'm doomed! 98 00:07:26,330 --> 00:07:27,330 Aah! 99 00:07:35,942 --> 00:07:37,738 Security check five. 100 00:07:37,809 --> 00:07:38,935 No problem. 101 00:07:44,183 --> 00:07:46,981 Man: There has been a breach in security. 102 00:07:47,053 --> 00:07:50,022 All prisoners, return to your cellblocks. 103 00:07:55,561 --> 00:07:57,324 Hey, you! 104 00:08:09,877 --> 00:08:12,573 Mr. Nash, you got to help me. 105 00:08:12,646 --> 00:08:14,409 I just killed a guy. 106 00:08:16,116 --> 00:08:17,913 What about it? You got to help me! 107 00:08:21,589 --> 00:08:23,819 I help no one who can't help me. 108 00:08:23,892 --> 00:08:25,756 Its your mess, Rubin. 109 00:08:25,826 --> 00:08:27,316 You clean it up. 110 00:08:27,394 --> 00:08:29,625 Mr. Nash, you... 111 00:08:29,697 --> 00:08:31,130 you got to do something! 112 00:08:32,734 --> 00:08:34,224 Help me! 113 00:08:40,141 --> 00:08:41,972 Good morning, Frank. 114 00:08:51,854 --> 00:08:53,287 Morning, Chuck. 115 00:08:53,355 --> 00:08:55,687 Did you have a problem last night? 116 00:08:55,758 --> 00:08:58,192 N-Nothing we couldn't handle. 117 00:08:58,260 --> 00:09:00,125 Oh. 118 00:09:00,996 --> 00:09:03,055 Not again today. 119 00:09:03,132 --> 00:09:06,329 You might as well go ahead and, uh, show him some kind of I.D., Miss Sparrow. 120 00:09:06,402 --> 00:09:07,893 I have to, and I'm his brother. 121 00:09:21,117 --> 00:09:24,609 What in the Sam Hill do you think you're doin'? 122 00:09:28,325 --> 00:09:29,758 Ernest? 123 00:09:29,826 --> 00:09:30,987 Ernest! 124 00:09:31,062 --> 00:09:31,994 Oh. 125 00:09:32,063 --> 00:09:33,462 What happened? 126 00:09:33,531 --> 00:09:36,192 Uh... uh, I-I was just guardin' the money... 127 00:09:36,266 --> 00:09:39,998 you know, bein' extra careful, uh, walkin' that extra mile. 128 00:09:40,071 --> 00:09:42,437 Ernest, this is the biggest mess you've ever made. 129 00:09:42,506 --> 00:09:44,098 If Mr. Pendlesmythe sees this... 130 00:09:44,175 --> 00:09:45,301 It wasn't my fault. 131 00:09:45,376 --> 00:09:47,469 They followed me in here. It was awful. 132 00:09:47,545 --> 00:09:49,809 You can't imagine... especially these two. 133 00:09:49,880 --> 00:09:53,476 Ernest, whatever happened, you've got to clean it up now. Come on. I'll help you. 134 00:09:53,552 --> 00:09:55,611 Did you read those books that I gave you? 135 00:09:55,687 --> 00:09:58,622 I tried, but they were real tough. 136 00:09:58,690 --> 00:10:02,421 There weren't any pictures, and the print was real small. 137 00:10:02,494 --> 00:10:05,429 Ernest, you've got to work hard if you want to get ahead. 138 00:10:05,497 --> 00:10:07,829 I know, but I get discouraged. 139 00:10:07,899 --> 00:10:11,858 And besides, Mr. Pendlesmythe's not gonna give me a chance. 140 00:10:11,937 --> 00:10:14,770 Ernest, you got to believe in yourself. 141 00:10:14,840 --> 00:10:18,106 Y-You've got to have faith in the system. 142 00:10:18,177 --> 00:10:21,271 You're right, Charlotte. 143 00:10:21,347 --> 00:10:24,316 After all, I am Ernest P. Worrell, 144 00:10:24,384 --> 00:10:27,785 an upwardly mobile American at his best, 145 00:10:27,854 --> 00:10:30,755 and I know that if I pay my taxes, bathe, 146 00:10:30,823 --> 00:10:32,257 and floss regularly, 147 00:10:32,326 --> 00:10:36,625 I will ascend the ladder of success, hand over foot. 148 00:10:36,696 --> 00:10:39,860 Ernest, do you think the floor needs a polish? 149 00:10:43,170 --> 00:10:45,035 Come on. Walk this way. Come on. 150 00:10:45,105 --> 00:10:47,869 Two minutes for me, man. 151 00:10:52,413 --> 00:10:54,608 Man: Attention to cellblock... 152 00:10:54,681 --> 00:10:58,117 exercise time is over in five minutes. 153 00:11:02,322 --> 00:11:04,587 Today's your deadline, Eddie. 154 00:11:04,659 --> 00:11:06,991 I want that money you owe me. 155 00:11:07,062 --> 00:11:09,155 I'm sorry, Mr. Nash. 156 00:11:09,230 --> 00:11:10,891 I just need a little more time. 157 00:11:10,965 --> 00:11:12,125 Not good enough, Eddie. 158 00:11:12,200 --> 00:11:13,724 Lyle... 159 00:11:13,802 --> 00:11:16,737 See if you can help Eddie with his attitude. 160 00:11:20,443 --> 00:11:22,672 I'll get it for you. I swear. 161 00:11:22,744 --> 00:11:24,109 Oh, I know that, Eddie. 162 00:11:24,179 --> 00:11:26,080 The question is when. 163 00:11:26,148 --> 00:11:29,379 Tomorrow... I'll get it for you tomorrow. 164 00:11:29,452 --> 00:11:33,479 Today's your deadline. I hate to encourage tardiness. 165 00:11:36,592 --> 00:11:40,187 Please... I'll get it for you tonight. 166 00:11:40,262 --> 00:11:41,525 I swear. 167 00:11:41,598 --> 00:11:43,395 See that you do, Eddie. 168 00:11:43,467 --> 00:11:45,957 See that you do. 169 00:11:52,976 --> 00:11:55,240 There. All cleaned up. 170 00:11:55,312 --> 00:11:57,803 That should pass Mr. Pendlesmythe's inspection. 171 00:11:57,881 --> 00:11:59,644 Right you are, Charlotte. 172 00:11:59,716 --> 00:12:03,345 And Mr. Poodlesmurf is lucky to have me on his team. 173 00:12:03,420 --> 00:12:06,117 As a matter of fact, one of these days, 174 00:12:06,190 --> 00:12:10,455 I'm gonna walk into that office, and I'm gonna say... 175 00:12:11,528 --> 00:12:13,929 - "Oscar, babe..." - What? 176 00:12:13,998 --> 00:12:15,898 Uh, good morning, Mr. Puddlesmoot... 177 00:12:15,967 --> 00:12:17,935 Smiddlepit... Smooglepoot... 178 00:12:18,002 --> 00:12:19,732 Pendlesmythe, you idiot! 179 00:12:19,805 --> 00:12:21,669 Uh, yes, sir. 180 00:12:23,541 --> 00:12:26,806 Can't you get anything right? 181 00:12:26,878 --> 00:12:28,938 Why are you such a screw-up? 182 00:12:35,086 --> 00:12:37,555 Ernest, you've got to be more careful. 183 00:12:37,623 --> 00:12:39,523 I know. 184 00:12:39,591 --> 00:12:41,752 I'll never get to be a clerk. 185 00:12:41,827 --> 00:12:44,318 I'll be lucky if they let me stay on as a janitor, 186 00:12:44,396 --> 00:12:45,658 know what I mean? 187 00:12:45,731 --> 00:12:47,926 Hey, maybe I can help you with that promotion. 188 00:12:48,000 --> 00:12:50,834 All you need is a little more self-confidence. 189 00:12:50,904 --> 00:12:54,601 You're right, Charlotte. I need to think more positive. 190 00:12:54,674 --> 00:12:58,268 I need to think... I'll get that job. 191 00:12:58,344 --> 00:13:01,780 Why, that man is putty in my fingers. 192 00:13:01,848 --> 00:13:03,873 I'm just toyin' with him now, 193 00:13:03,950 --> 00:13:06,044 like a kitten with a June bug. 194 00:13:06,120 --> 00:13:07,814 I was just thinking that, uh, 195 00:13:07,887 --> 00:13:09,565 Yeah, like a... - since you're not working tomorrow 196 00:13:09,589 --> 00:13:10,886 that maybe we could get together, 197 00:13:10,957 --> 00:13:12,822 talk about the job, maybe have dinner. 198 00:13:12,892 --> 00:13:15,828 Dinner? 199 00:13:15,896 --> 00:13:18,990 Did you say "dinner"... like just the two of us 200 00:13:19,066 --> 00:13:21,557 in the same town on the same day in the same restaurant, 201 00:13:21,635 --> 00:13:23,227 possibly at the same table? 202 00:13:23,304 --> 00:13:26,034 Well, yes, but... just as friends, right? 203 00:13:26,106 --> 00:13:29,474 I mean just as friends. I mean, we'll get together, we'll talk about the job. 204 00:13:29,544 --> 00:13:31,033 I can give you some, uh, insights 205 00:13:31,111 --> 00:13:32,635 based upon my experience. 206 00:13:32,713 --> 00:13:34,112 Experience. 207 00:13:34,181 --> 00:13:35,773 Oh, yeah. 208 00:13:35,849 --> 00:13:39,047 Well, I suggest you bring your willpower, young woman. 209 00:13:39,120 --> 00:13:43,215 Be forewarned... the Worrell charm is merciless. 210 00:13:49,297 --> 00:13:51,731 Oh, sure, Charlotte. 211 00:13:51,800 --> 00:13:54,963 You just want to show me... the ropes. 212 00:13:55,036 --> 00:13:58,767 You just want to give me a leg up to the bottom rung 213 00:13:58,840 --> 00:14:02,038 of that little ladder called "success." 214 00:14:02,111 --> 00:14:03,373 Oh, yeah. 215 00:14:03,446 --> 00:14:04,913 Come on, Rimshot. 216 00:14:04,981 --> 00:14:07,711 We have to choose just the right ensemble. 217 00:14:07,783 --> 00:14:09,876 No. Too formal for dinner. 218 00:14:11,454 --> 00:14:14,048 Ah, the perfect choice... 219 00:14:14,123 --> 00:14:19,618 European styling with a decidedly American flair. 220 00:14:24,167 --> 00:14:26,897 Charlotte has more than a professional interest 221 00:14:26,970 --> 00:14:28,562 in yours truly. 222 00:14:28,639 --> 00:14:30,663 And who can blame her? 223 00:14:30,740 --> 00:14:32,208 I've never understood 224 00:14:32,276 --> 00:14:34,801 why I have such a profound effect on women, 225 00:14:34,878 --> 00:14:37,403 but why argue with success? 226 00:14:51,062 --> 00:14:54,088 Yeah, I'm a man who has just found his parking space 227 00:14:54,165 --> 00:14:56,258 in the fast lane. 228 00:14:58,303 --> 00:15:00,897 Who knows what lies ahead for such a man? 229 00:15:02,675 --> 00:15:05,007 Aah-aah-aah-aah! 230 00:15:05,077 --> 00:15:07,840 Aah-aah-aah-aah-aah-aah! 231 00:15:07,912 --> 00:15:10,347 Aah-aah-aah-aah-aah-aah! 232 00:15:10,416 --> 00:15:12,008 Aah-aah-aah! 233 00:15:12,084 --> 00:15:18,080 Ahhhhhh... 234 00:15:21,827 --> 00:15:25,161 Wh-o-o-o-oa! Uh! 235 00:15:47,354 --> 00:15:50,688 Well, there's my problem right there. 236 00:15:50,758 --> 00:15:53,248 Looks like this little wire's got a little sh... 237 00:15:53,326 --> 00:15:56,091 ...hhhhhhhhhhhhh... 238 00:15:56,163 --> 00:15:57,255 ...ort in it. 239 00:16:00,000 --> 00:16:04,300 Gosh! Not again. 240 00:16:04,372 --> 00:16:06,465 Woman: Oh! 241 00:16:09,377 --> 00:16:11,312 Bonsoir. Dinner for two? 242 00:16:11,380 --> 00:16:12,540 Right. 243 00:16:12,614 --> 00:16:14,138 I'll be your waiter this evening. 244 00:16:14,216 --> 00:16:15,740 You may call me Philippe. 245 00:16:15,817 --> 00:16:18,148 I'll just give you a moment to look over your menu. 246 00:16:18,219 --> 00:16:20,688 I had a long talk with Mr. Pendlesmythe today. 247 00:16:20,756 --> 00:16:22,519 It took a lot of convincing, 248 00:16:22,591 --> 00:16:24,491 but he agreed to accept your application 249 00:16:24,559 --> 00:16:25,685 for the clerk's job. 250 00:16:25,761 --> 00:16:26,956 He did? 251 00:16:27,029 --> 00:16:29,155 But the thing is... 252 00:16:29,231 --> 00:16:30,994 y-you've got to be more careful. 253 00:16:31,066 --> 00:16:33,193 I just know I can win him over. 254 00:16:33,268 --> 00:16:35,999 We'll have that little talk around the old water cooler 255 00:16:36,072 --> 00:16:39,598 about... team sports and transmissions, 256 00:16:39,674 --> 00:16:42,235 jock itch... things that just guys talk about, know what I mean? 257 00:16:42,311 --> 00:16:43,903 I'll have him eatin' 258 00:16:43,980 --> 00:16:45,607 Right out of the palm of my hand. 259 00:16:45,681 --> 00:16:47,581 I know that its hard, Ernest, 260 00:16:47,650 --> 00:16:50,449 But Mr. Pendlesmythe can't stand mistakes. 261 00:16:50,521 --> 00:16:53,065 And between you and I, I don't think he can stand people, either. 262 00:16:53,089 --> 00:16:55,717 Oh, thats okay. I'm not like other people, know what I mean? 263 00:16:56,826 --> 00:16:58,158 Frankly, Ernest, 264 00:16:58,228 --> 00:16:59,923 I don't even know why you want the job. 265 00:16:59,997 --> 00:17:01,828 I mean, he's a horrible man to work for. 266 00:17:01,899 --> 00:17:03,263 At least where you are now, 267 00:17:03,332 --> 00:17:05,062 you only have to see him once a day. 268 00:17:05,135 --> 00:17:06,830 Want to hear something really funny? 269 00:17:06,904 --> 00:17:08,599 I thought I was gonna get promoted 270 00:17:08,672 --> 00:17:11,368 to branch manager this time last year. 271 00:17:11,442 --> 00:17:12,774 What a laugh, huh? 272 00:17:12,844 --> 00:17:15,505 Y-Yeah, but did you hear the one about the 3-legged dog. 273 00:17:15,579 --> 00:17:17,206 That walked into the saloon and said, 274 00:17:17,281 --> 00:17:19,943 "I'm lookin' for the guy that shot my 'paw"'? 275 00:17:20,017 --> 00:17:21,017 Ah heh heh heh heh. 276 00:17:22,187 --> 00:17:24,519 Ernest, this is fun. 277 00:17:25,790 --> 00:17:26,966 I mean, you're pretty good company. 278 00:17:26,990 --> 00:17:29,221 I come from a long line of bon vivants. 279 00:17:29,294 --> 00:17:31,194 We're known for our charm, wit, 280 00:17:31,262 --> 00:17:33,526 and sparkling dinner conversation, know what I mean? 281 00:17:34,666 --> 00:17:36,294 Ernest? 282 00:17:36,368 --> 00:17:37,960 Ernest, are you all right? 283 00:17:42,807 --> 00:17:46,005 I recommend the lobster. Ah heh heh. Ah heh heh heh. 284 00:17:46,078 --> 00:17:47,170 Sir. 285 00:17:47,246 --> 00:17:49,271 Man: There he is. 286 00:17:49,348 --> 00:17:52,317 Hey, warden, we don't come to your house. 287 00:17:56,522 --> 00:17:58,114 Open C-12. 288 00:18:00,527 --> 00:18:03,086 Well, well, well. 289 00:18:03,162 --> 00:18:06,188 If it isn't the infamous Mr. Nash. 290 00:18:06,265 --> 00:18:08,496 My sources tell me that you and your guard dog 291 00:18:08,568 --> 00:18:11,093 got in some trouble yesterday down in the weight room. 292 00:18:11,171 --> 00:18:13,605 Just mindin' my own business, warden, 293 00:18:13,673 --> 00:18:16,301 somethin' you might want to try sometime. 294 00:18:20,380 --> 00:18:23,350 Now, you can make things easy on yourself, 295 00:18:23,417 --> 00:18:25,647 or you can make 'em hard. 296 00:18:25,719 --> 00:18:27,983 Its up to you. 297 00:18:28,054 --> 00:18:29,783 You hear me, Nash?! 298 00:18:29,857 --> 00:18:31,620 Yeah, I hear you, warden. 299 00:18:31,692 --> 00:18:33,489 Now you hear me. 300 00:18:33,561 --> 00:18:36,121 When you step out of that cozy little office, 301 00:18:36,197 --> 00:18:37,391 you're on my turf. 302 00:18:37,464 --> 00:18:40,559 And if I were you, I would watch my step. 303 00:18:41,802 --> 00:18:45,033 If thats a threat, its a weak one. 304 00:18:45,106 --> 00:18:48,201 Your day's comin' real soon, Nash... 305 00:18:48,277 --> 00:18:50,938 and we both know it. 306 00:18:55,584 --> 00:18:57,176 Man: Close C-12. 307 00:18:57,252 --> 00:18:59,720 I've got to get out of this place. 308 00:18:59,788 --> 00:19:02,120 Chuck: Ernest, you wouldn't believe 309 00:19:02,190 --> 00:19:05,159 the new security system we have for the van... 310 00:19:05,227 --> 00:19:07,354 maximum protection and minimum carnage... 311 00:19:08,765 --> 00:19:10,790 And three levels of power! 312 00:19:10,867 --> 00:19:11,799 Ernest, I... 313 00:19:11,868 --> 00:19:13,357 Thanks, Chuck. Thanks, Bobby. 314 00:19:13,435 --> 00:19:15,494 I'm not finished talkin' to you about this! 315 00:19:15,571 --> 00:19:16,834 This is really neat! 316 00:19:21,077 --> 00:19:22,101 Here, Rimshot. 317 00:19:22,178 --> 00:19:23,304 Here, boy. 318 00:19:23,379 --> 00:19:24,971 Thats a good boy. How you been? 319 00:19:25,048 --> 00:19:26,048 Miss your daddy? 320 00:19:26,115 --> 00:19:27,605 Good boy. 321 00:19:27,684 --> 00:19:29,777 Lets see what we got in the mail. 322 00:19:29,852 --> 00:19:32,117 All right! 323 00:19:32,189 --> 00:19:33,315 Down you go. 324 00:19:58,149 --> 00:20:00,412 Wow! 325 00:20:00,484 --> 00:20:03,215 This is great! I don't believe it! 326 00:20:03,288 --> 00:20:04,687 Jury duty! 327 00:20:04,756 --> 00:20:09,591 Look, Rimshot! I've been chosen for jury duty! 328 00:20:11,896 --> 00:20:14,729 This is great! 329 00:20:14,799 --> 00:20:16,562 Chuck! 330 00:20:16,635 --> 00:20:17,830 Bobby! 331 00:20:21,307 --> 00:20:22,831 Chuck! Bobby! 332 00:20:22,908 --> 00:20:24,465 Alley-oop. 333 00:20:24,542 --> 00:20:25,542 Uh-oh. 334 00:20:30,082 --> 00:20:31,709 I hate this minefield. 335 00:20:33,119 --> 00:20:35,179 Its a miracle! I'm so happy! I'm ecstatic! 336 00:20:35,255 --> 00:20:38,587 Uh, uh, its a dream come true! 337 00:20:38,658 --> 00:20:40,148 Chuck, Bobby, guess what! 338 00:20:41,728 --> 00:20:44,026 Ernest, you're in the line of fire! Move it! 339 00:20:44,097 --> 00:20:46,964 Go! Pick 'em up, put 'em down! Go! Go! Go! 340 00:20:47,034 --> 00:20:48,261 I hate this part! 341 00:20:48,334 --> 00:20:50,166 Ow! 342 00:20:51,571 --> 00:20:53,505 I'm the luckiest guy in the whole world. 343 00:20:53,573 --> 00:20:54,699 They chose me. 344 00:20:54,775 --> 00:20:56,971 Out of hundreds of thousands of other people, 345 00:20:57,045 --> 00:20:59,103 they chose me for United States jury duty. 346 00:20:59,179 --> 00:21:00,441 Isn't that great? 347 00:21:00,514 --> 00:21:01,845 Yeah, great. 348 00:21:01,915 --> 00:21:03,940 Bobby, soup's on! 349 00:21:04,018 --> 00:21:06,043 I mean, the opportunity to decide... 350 00:21:06,120 --> 00:21:09,851 right or wrong, good or evil, 351 00:21:09,924 --> 00:21:12,188 regular or unleaded, 352 00:21:12,260 --> 00:21:15,957 to hold a man's life in the palm of my hand and decide, 353 00:21:16,030 --> 00:21:18,965 "Should I crush it... or allow it to go free 354 00:21:19,033 --> 00:21:21,559 like a bird on the wings of time?" 355 00:21:26,307 --> 00:21:27,400 Burn him. 356 00:21:33,148 --> 00:21:35,946 Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, 357 00:21:36,018 --> 00:21:39,920 one of the most precious guarantees in our Constitution 358 00:21:39,988 --> 00:21:41,649 is that of a fair trial. 359 00:21:41,724 --> 00:21:45,957 Every defendant has the right to one. 360 00:21:46,028 --> 00:21:49,225 This defendant is no exception. 361 00:21:49,298 --> 00:21:53,463 It is you who must decide his case, not I. 362 00:21:53,536 --> 00:21:57,996 You must weigh the evidence carefully. 363 00:21:59,976 --> 00:22:01,637 Counselor, you may proceed. 364 00:22:01,711 --> 00:22:03,303 Thank you, your honor. 365 00:22:03,379 --> 00:22:04,937 Ladies and gentlemen, 366 00:22:05,014 --> 00:22:08,542 the state will prove that the defendant, Rubin Bartlett, 367 00:22:08,619 --> 00:22:11,519 who is a known henchman of the notorious crime czar 368 00:22:11,588 --> 00:22:13,921 and bank robber Felix Nash, 369 00:22:13,991 --> 00:22:16,391 did, in fact, murder. 370 00:22:16,460 --> 00:22:19,759 A fellow prisoner while in jail. 371 00:22:19,830 --> 00:22:22,856 And for this, the state asks that you extend 372 00:22:22,933 --> 00:22:24,901 his remaining time of five months 373 00:22:24,969 --> 00:22:29,066 into a sentence of life without parole. 374 00:22:32,210 --> 00:22:35,144 Ladies and gentlemen, the defense will show 375 00:22:35,212 --> 00:22:38,148 that the deceased was not killed by my client. 376 00:22:38,216 --> 00:22:42,050 In fact, he wasn't killed by anyone. 377 00:22:42,120 --> 00:22:45,112 He died as the result of a tragic accident, 378 00:22:45,190 --> 00:22:48,557 when, in a poorly lit stairwell, 379 00:22:48,627 --> 00:22:51,721 he tripped over an inadequately placed railing 380 00:22:51,797 --> 00:22:57,064 and plunged, regrettably, to his death. 381 00:22:57,135 --> 00:22:59,569 If there is a guilty party in this case, 382 00:22:59,638 --> 00:23:02,267 it must surely be the system, 383 00:23:02,341 --> 00:23:06,744 to allow such unsafe conditions to exist. 384 00:23:08,881 --> 00:23:11,441 Once you've heard the evidence, I'm sure you'll agree with me 385 00:23:11,517 --> 00:23:15,147 that the charges against my client, Mr. Bartlett, 386 00:23:15,222 --> 00:23:16,985 are completely spurious, 387 00:23:17,057 --> 00:23:21,356 and that you will find him... not guilty. 388 00:23:31,906 --> 00:23:33,167 Ah heh heh heh. 389 00:23:33,240 --> 00:23:35,265 Excuse me, sir. Are you all right? 390 00:23:35,342 --> 00:23:37,833 Uh, just fine, thank you. 391 00:23:45,185 --> 00:23:47,245 This guy looks exactly the same as Nash. 392 00:23:47,322 --> 00:23:48,448 Are you crazy? I... 393 00:23:48,523 --> 00:23:51,981 look, the guy's perfect. Its downright uncanny. 394 00:23:52,060 --> 00:23:53,722 We can't just... 395 00:23:53,796 --> 00:23:55,263 Itll work. It will. 396 00:23:55,331 --> 00:23:58,197 Your honor... to allow the jury 397 00:23:58,266 --> 00:24:01,030 to fully understand the case for the defense, 398 00:24:01,102 --> 00:24:02,832 we feel as though its imperative 399 00:24:02,905 --> 00:24:04,668 that they see the environment 400 00:24:04,740 --> 00:24:07,674 within which this unfortunate accident occurred. 401 00:24:07,742 --> 00:24:10,405 Therefore, we move that these proceedings be continued 402 00:24:10,479 --> 00:24:13,141 to the site of the alleged crime. 403 00:24:13,215 --> 00:24:16,343 Well, I find this request highly irregular. 404 00:24:16,418 --> 00:24:19,149 However, if the prosecution has no objections... 405 00:24:19,221 --> 00:24:21,815 Prosecutor: Uh, no objections, your honor. 406 00:24:21,891 --> 00:24:24,018 So be it. 407 00:24:24,093 --> 00:24:28,428 These proceedings will reconvene tomorrow at 10:00 a.m. At the Dracup Correctional Facility. 408 00:24:29,499 --> 00:24:31,625 Oh, boy! 409 00:24:31,700 --> 00:24:33,896 A field trip! 410 00:24:35,972 --> 00:24:40,205 I'm telling you... this guy is right on the numbers. 411 00:24:40,278 --> 00:24:41,540 Its so simple. 412 00:24:41,612 --> 00:24:42,544 Towel. 413 00:24:42,613 --> 00:24:43,874 We make the switch, 414 00:24:43,947 --> 00:24:45,847 you get in on the jury and find me innocent, 415 00:24:45,916 --> 00:24:47,942 then you walk away a free man, 416 00:24:48,019 --> 00:24:51,386 and I make sure this guy Ernest gets whats coming to you. 417 00:24:51,455 --> 00:24:52,717 In and out... 418 00:24:52,790 --> 00:24:55,623 wham, bam... and its over. 419 00:24:57,662 --> 00:24:59,061 Yeah. 420 00:24:59,130 --> 00:25:02,725 I'm a real big fan of the early release program. 421 00:25:21,320 --> 00:25:24,255 Attorney: I would like to thank the members of the jury 422 00:25:24,323 --> 00:25:26,292 for bearing with us. 423 00:25:26,359 --> 00:25:27,917 Dracup Prison is... 424 00:25:27,994 --> 00:25:31,724 Okay, Lyle, we got one shot at this, so make it count. 425 00:25:31,797 --> 00:25:33,822 ...there are those that must endure its reality. 426 00:25:33,900 --> 00:25:38,496 So, what we are here to talk about today... 427 00:25:38,571 --> 00:25:40,766 is death... horrible... 428 00:25:40,840 --> 00:25:44,298 frightening, something to be avoided. 429 00:25:44,377 --> 00:25:46,436 But is death murder? 430 00:25:46,512 --> 00:25:48,810 Is murder death? 431 00:25:48,881 --> 00:25:50,747 I think not. 432 00:25:50,818 --> 00:25:53,980 And yet, though we must feel some sympathy for the victim, 433 00:25:54,053 --> 00:25:56,180 we cannot... 434 00:25:56,255 --> 00:25:57,746 Psst! 435 00:25:57,825 --> 00:25:59,258 By wrongfully accusing... 436 00:25:59,326 --> 00:26:02,124 And that, ladies and gentlemen, is exactly what... 437 00:26:02,196 --> 00:26:03,754 The state has made no case. 438 00:26:03,831 --> 00:26:04,856 Psst! 439 00:26:04,933 --> 00:26:06,476 They've presented no compelling evidence. 440 00:26:06,500 --> 00:26:07,592 Come here, you. 441 00:26:07,668 --> 00:26:10,432 Why? Because there is none... 442 00:26:10,504 --> 00:26:11,835 Am I me? 443 00:26:11,905 --> 00:26:13,771 Nash: Come here. 444 00:26:13,842 --> 00:26:15,241 Huh? 445 00:26:15,310 --> 00:26:16,868 We don't dispute that. 446 00:26:16,945 --> 00:26:21,382 Of course, all of us, as reasonable human beings, 447 00:26:21,449 --> 00:26:23,246 mourn them... 448 00:26:26,588 --> 00:26:27,954 Ugh! 449 00:26:29,924 --> 00:26:33,018 Attorney: Certainly... 450 00:26:34,295 --> 00:26:36,958 Hurry up, Lyle. 451 00:26:37,033 --> 00:26:39,263 And keeping this in mind, 452 00:26:39,335 --> 00:26:43,669 I would like to move these proceedings to the staircase... 453 00:26:43,739 --> 00:26:46,003 Man: Right this way, please. 454 00:26:46,075 --> 00:26:47,508 Heh heh heh. 455 00:26:51,415 --> 00:26:54,076 All right, Rubin, lets go. 456 00:27:00,157 --> 00:27:03,217 Nash! Wake up! 457 00:27:03,293 --> 00:27:07,024 No napping during exercise period. 458 00:27:09,099 --> 00:27:10,498 No talking. 459 00:27:10,567 --> 00:27:14,197 Yes, sir, officer, whatever you say. 460 00:27:14,272 --> 00:27:17,604 Boy, this is great! 461 00:27:17,674 --> 00:27:20,165 A brief workout to gather our thoughts, 462 00:27:20,243 --> 00:27:22,974 then its off to the jury room to decide... 463 00:27:23,047 --> 00:27:24,412 very ingenious. 464 00:27:24,482 --> 00:27:27,110 And they even gave us these nifty workout clothes. 465 00:27:27,185 --> 00:27:29,118 Boy, I love jury duty, don't you? 466 00:27:29,186 --> 00:27:30,552 Whatever you say, Mr. Nash. 467 00:27:30,621 --> 00:27:32,282 Oh, you don't have to be so formal. 468 00:27:32,356 --> 00:27:34,483 You can just call me Ernest, Ernest P. Worrell. 469 00:27:34,559 --> 00:27:36,254 Hey! You know the rules. No talking. 470 00:27:36,327 --> 00:27:37,852 Yes, sir. 471 00:27:37,930 --> 00:27:40,955 Kind of strict, aren't they? 472 00:27:42,733 --> 00:27:44,894 Man: Cellblock B-29, move to the left. 473 00:27:44,970 --> 00:27:46,267 The rest of you, move... 474 00:27:46,338 --> 00:27:48,670 Man ♪2: "C" to the left, "D" to the right. 475 00:27:48,740 --> 00:27:50,708 Ah, lunch... how thoughtful. 476 00:27:50,776 --> 00:27:53,745 For the mind to work, the body must have fuel. 477 00:27:53,812 --> 00:27:55,473 A lot of jurors here today. 478 00:27:55,547 --> 00:27:58,243 There must be a lot of trials going on... 479 00:27:58,317 --> 00:28:01,310 a sad commentary on our disintegrating society, 480 00:28:01,387 --> 00:28:02,649 know what I mean? 481 00:28:04,523 --> 00:28:06,286 Man: All right, brace it up. 482 00:28:23,777 --> 00:28:27,234 Oh, uh, I don't think our table has any steak sauce. 483 00:28:27,313 --> 00:28:28,575 Get up! 484 00:28:28,648 --> 00:28:30,411 I-I'm sorry. Where are my manners? 485 00:28:30,483 --> 00:28:32,315 I should have waited for the others. 486 00:28:33,721 --> 00:28:35,120 Eat, greaseball! 487 00:28:37,258 --> 00:28:39,954 I didn't order greaseball. 488 00:28:40,027 --> 00:28:41,790 Wrap it up. Wrap it up. 489 00:28:41,862 --> 00:28:44,387 Man: All right, stand to the back. 490 00:28:44,465 --> 00:28:46,433 Backs against the wall. 491 00:28:46,500 --> 00:28:48,196 Open up "C" block. 492 00:28:48,270 --> 00:28:51,067 All right, lets move it! 493 00:28:51,138 --> 00:28:53,368 Come on, come on, come on, lets go. 494 00:28:53,440 --> 00:28:54,931 Ernest: We're sequestered, 495 00:28:55,010 --> 00:28:57,535 a- and on top of that, we can't even leave. 496 00:28:57,612 --> 00:29:01,309 Oh, this is great. This is just great. 497 00:29:01,383 --> 00:29:02,680 Uh! 498 00:29:02,751 --> 00:29:05,549 I hope you've got a good story to tell my boss. 499 00:29:05,620 --> 00:29:07,952 After all, I do have a living to earn. 500 00:29:08,023 --> 00:29:09,320 Now, look, Nash... 501 00:29:09,391 --> 00:29:11,758 My name is Worrell, Ernest P. Worrell. 502 00:29:11,827 --> 00:29:13,260 Oh, Mr. Funny Man, huh? 503 00:29:13,329 --> 00:29:15,853 Yeah, Mr. Funny Man, you'll think funny 504 00:29:15,931 --> 00:29:18,730 when you're tapping to the tune of 220, son! 505 00:29:20,603 --> 00:29:22,298 That is the rudest bailiff 506 00:29:22,371 --> 00:29:24,202 I have ever seen in my life. 507 00:29:24,273 --> 00:29:25,206 Ugh! 508 00:29:25,275 --> 00:29:28,801 Oh! 509 00:29:28,878 --> 00:29:31,642 Wait a minute. 510 00:29:31,714 --> 00:29:34,047 Ooh! Oh! 511 00:29:34,117 --> 00:29:36,312 Man: Hey, come on, knock it off! 512 00:29:36,386 --> 00:29:38,649 You're that guy. 513 00:29:38,721 --> 00:29:41,122 Bailiff! Bailiff! 514 00:29:41,191 --> 00:29:43,250 You're in big trouble now, pal. 515 00:29:43,327 --> 00:29:44,327 Bailiff! 516 00:29:44,394 --> 00:29:45,656 What is it, Nash? 517 00:29:45,729 --> 00:29:46,991 You see that guy? 518 00:29:47,064 --> 00:29:48,190 Yeah. So? 519 00:29:48,265 --> 00:29:50,256 No, I mean look... look at him. 520 00:29:50,334 --> 00:29:51,460 Come closer. Look. 521 00:29:51,535 --> 00:29:53,935 You see that guy? He's not on the jury. 522 00:29:54,004 --> 00:29:55,904 This man is a prisoner. 523 00:29:55,973 --> 00:29:59,000 I ought to throw you in the hole for that, Nash! 524 00:29:59,077 --> 00:30:01,738 - The hole? - Yeah, the hole! 525 00:30:01,812 --> 00:30:05,806 The hole, like... like in solitary, the hole... 526 00:30:05,883 --> 00:30:08,943 like in real prison, like in real, 527 00:30:09,020 --> 00:30:11,546 really, really, really, really, really real prison? 528 00:30:11,624 --> 00:30:13,523 The hoosegow, the slammer, the joint, 529 00:30:13,591 --> 00:30:16,355 alcatraz, San Quentin, Sing Sing... 530 00:30:16,427 --> 00:30:19,295 Oh, no, I... I'm in... I'm in... 531 00:30:19,365 --> 00:30:25,894 jai-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-I! 532 00:30:25,970 --> 00:30:27,905 Jail! 533 00:30:28,841 --> 00:30:30,741 Ha ha ha ha ha. 534 00:30:30,809 --> 00:30:33,471 Your honor, we have reached a decision. 535 00:30:35,148 --> 00:30:38,446 We find the defendant, Rubin Bartlett, not guilty. 536 00:30:40,953 --> 00:30:44,549 Have you... carefully weighed the evidence? 537 00:30:47,661 --> 00:30:49,287 Yes, we have, your honor. 538 00:30:49,361 --> 00:30:52,422 The defendant, found not guilty, 539 00:30:52,499 --> 00:30:55,468 will return to the state penitentiary, 540 00:30:55,535 --> 00:30:58,994 where he will complete his previous sentence. 541 00:31:01,241 --> 00:31:02,333 Mm-hmm. 542 00:31:02,409 --> 00:31:03,876 Good night. 543 00:31:14,588 --> 00:31:16,180 Lets go! 544 00:31:16,257 --> 00:31:18,418 Ernest, we're late for work, 545 00:31:18,492 --> 00:31:21,428 and Mr. P. Does not appreciate tardiness. 546 00:31:21,496 --> 00:31:23,487 So, how'd it go, Mr. Juror? 547 00:31:30,439 --> 00:31:33,704 Now, on to the real important question... 548 00:31:33,775 --> 00:31:35,503 how did your date go? 549 00:31:35,576 --> 00:31:38,239 Oh, we had a nice time. 550 00:31:38,313 --> 00:31:39,712 Nice time? 551 00:31:39,781 --> 00:31:41,715 Now, whats the deal with the hair? 552 00:31:41,783 --> 00:31:44,082 You bringing the wet look back? 553 00:31:44,153 --> 00:31:45,848 I'm just trying something new. 554 00:31:45,922 --> 00:31:49,322 Oh. Where's your, uh, where's your sky piece, 555 00:31:49,391 --> 00:31:51,450 you know, your lid, your brown cap? 556 00:31:51,526 --> 00:31:53,495 I never see you without that brown cap. 557 00:31:53,563 --> 00:31:55,053 I must've lost it somewhere. 558 00:31:57,200 --> 00:31:58,667 Bobby... 559 00:32:00,236 --> 00:32:03,728 ...there's something bad wrong here. 560 00:32:10,414 --> 00:32:14,008 This guy... 561 00:32:14,083 --> 00:32:16,746 This guy... 562 00:32:16,820 --> 00:32:19,812 is in love... L-U-V! 563 00:32:19,890 --> 00:32:21,323 Ernest is in love! Ha ha ha ha! 564 00:32:21,392 --> 00:32:24,190 ♪ Ernest and Charlotte, sittin' in a tree ♪ 565 00:32:24,261 --> 00:32:26,923 ♪ K-I-S-S-l-N-G ♪ 566 00:32:26,997 --> 00:32:28,931 ♪ First comes love and then comes marriage ♪ 567 00:32:28,999 --> 00:32:31,594 ♪ Then comes Ernest pushing a baby carriage ♪ 568 00:32:31,669 --> 00:32:33,261 Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! 569 00:32:48,653 --> 00:32:51,781 Chuck: Ernest, you're not gonna believe this, 570 00:32:51,856 --> 00:32:55,020 but we have a new security system at the bank. 571 00:32:57,763 --> 00:33:01,358 A bank? I work in a bank? 572 00:33:03,936 --> 00:33:05,801 Lets go! 573 00:33:08,541 --> 00:33:09,803 Man: Close "C" block. 574 00:33:09,875 --> 00:33:12,605 Look, look, I tell you... I'm not this guy Nash. 575 00:33:12,678 --> 00:33:15,545 If you're not Mr. Nash, how come you look like him? 576 00:33:15,614 --> 00:33:18,448 Because he's obviously a very attractive criminal. 577 00:33:18,518 --> 00:33:20,611 Yeah, thats right, too. 578 00:33:20,687 --> 00:33:23,052 Lyle, tell him who I am. 579 00:33:23,122 --> 00:33:25,216 Man: Hey, Mr. Nash, did he fall for it? 580 00:33:25,292 --> 00:33:29,126 Thats real funny, Mr. Nash. 581 00:33:31,198 --> 00:33:32,689 Open up C-12. 582 00:33:34,768 --> 00:33:37,202 Did you miss me, Mr. Nash? 583 00:33:37,270 --> 00:33:38,703 Close it up. 584 00:33:38,772 --> 00:33:42,231 You! You know I'm not Nash. 585 00:33:42,310 --> 00:33:44,710 Of course you are... 586 00:33:44,779 --> 00:33:47,646 Ernest. 587 00:33:50,485 --> 00:33:52,214 You've got nothing to worry about. 588 00:33:52,286 --> 00:33:53,878 I'll make sure this thing plays 589 00:33:53,955 --> 00:33:55,446 just the way we laid it out. 590 00:33:55,524 --> 00:33:59,118 Just make sure everything stays in line on your end. 591 00:33:59,193 --> 00:34:01,627 I've got another deal working here, 592 00:34:01,696 --> 00:34:04,165 and there'll be a cut in it for you. 593 00:34:04,233 --> 00:34:06,360 That idiot you switched me for 594 00:34:06,435 --> 00:34:07,766 has a job in a bank. 595 00:34:07,836 --> 00:34:09,166 I don't believe it. 596 00:34:09,237 --> 00:34:11,763 Sometimes the cards just fall your way. 597 00:34:11,840 --> 00:34:13,637 Yeah. 598 00:34:13,709 --> 00:34:17,304 You just make sure nobody figures out that idiot isn't me. 599 00:34:17,379 --> 00:34:18,711 Listen, little man, 600 00:34:18,781 --> 00:34:21,715 you've pushed me as far as you're going to. 601 00:34:21,783 --> 00:34:24,081 I've got some big things riding, 602 00:34:24,152 --> 00:34:26,678 and if you know whats good for you, 603 00:34:26,756 --> 00:34:28,087 you'll play ball. 604 00:34:28,157 --> 00:34:30,421 O-Oh, great! What position? 605 00:34:30,493 --> 00:34:33,086 You do like we say, 606 00:34:33,161 --> 00:34:35,687 or Lyle here will break your back... 607 00:34:35,765 --> 00:34:37,665 Like that. 608 00:34:39,202 --> 00:34:41,865 Well, then he'll just have to break my back 609 00:34:41,939 --> 00:34:44,566 like... like that thing you guys did. 610 00:34:44,641 --> 00:34:46,370 Real men are not intimidated 611 00:34:46,442 --> 00:34:49,241 by physical threats against their personal selves, 612 00:34:49,313 --> 00:34:51,645 and ironically, neither am I. 613 00:34:51,715 --> 00:34:54,809 What about violence against other people? 614 00:34:54,885 --> 00:34:56,146 What do you mean? 615 00:34:56,219 --> 00:34:59,781 I mean, while you're being Mr. Nash in here, 616 00:34:59,857 --> 00:35:02,621 Mr. Nash is being you out there. 617 00:35:02,693 --> 00:35:05,390 Yeah, he's living your life, 618 00:35:05,463 --> 00:35:08,454 working at your job at the bank, 619 00:35:08,532 --> 00:35:10,932 hanging out with your friends, 620 00:35:11,001 --> 00:35:12,765 and if you don't behave, 621 00:35:12,837 --> 00:35:15,670 he may have to get very strict 622 00:35:15,740 --> 00:35:18,937 with someone you really care about. 623 00:35:19,010 --> 00:35:20,671 Charlotte? No! 624 00:35:20,745 --> 00:35:23,009 That your girl? 625 00:35:23,081 --> 00:35:24,446 Well, sort of. 626 00:35:24,516 --> 00:35:27,611 Well, she's gonna "sort of" be dead 627 00:35:27,687 --> 00:35:29,780 if you don't play along. 628 00:35:29,855 --> 00:35:32,049 You lay one finger on her, and I'll... 629 00:35:32,123 --> 00:35:33,488 Hey, relax. 630 00:35:33,558 --> 00:35:37,325 She'll be all right as long as you behave. 631 00:35:39,799 --> 00:35:42,233 Okay, what do I have to do? 632 00:35:42,301 --> 00:35:46,169 You've got to be Nash. 633 00:35:49,709 --> 00:35:52,235 Okay, Lyle, this guy Nash, he's a tough guy, right, 634 00:35:52,312 --> 00:35:53,643 he's a gangster. 635 00:35:53,714 --> 00:35:55,180 Okay, how about this? 636 00:35:55,247 --> 00:35:56,839 You dirty rat, 637 00:35:56,916 --> 00:35:58,908 you're the guy that shot my brother, 638 00:35:58,986 --> 00:36:01,648 and I'm the guy thats gonna shoot you. 639 00:36:03,090 --> 00:36:04,990 Y-You dirty rat, 640 00:36:05,058 --> 00:36:07,117 y-you're the guy that, eh, eh, shot my brother, 641 00:36:07,194 --> 00:36:09,662 and I'm the guy thats gonna shoot you... 642 00:36:09,730 --> 00:36:11,595 every goddang one of you. 643 00:36:11,665 --> 00:36:13,189 Too old, huh? 644 00:36:14,002 --> 00:36:16,971 Hey, yo, Murdock, 645 00:36:17,038 --> 00:36:19,631 you're the guy that shot my brother, right, 646 00:36:19,706 --> 00:36:22,301 and I'm the guy thats gonna shoot you, eh? 647 00:36:22,377 --> 00:36:23,776 All right. 648 00:36:23,845 --> 00:36:25,278 Of all the gin joints 649 00:36:25,346 --> 00:36:27,143 in all the cities in all the world, 650 00:36:27,215 --> 00:36:30,946 you've got to waltz into my place and shoot my brother. 651 00:36:31,019 --> 00:36:32,281 Play it, Sam. 652 00:36:32,353 --> 00:36:34,344 The piano will cover up the shot. 653 00:36:34,422 --> 00:36:36,185 Why, you dirty rat, 654 00:36:36,257 --> 00:36:38,021 you're the guy that shot my brother, 655 00:36:38,093 --> 00:36:41,721 and I'm the guy thats gonna shoot you. 656 00:36:42,697 --> 00:36:45,394 Why, you're the dirty, scum-suckin' pig dog 657 00:36:45,467 --> 00:36:46,798 that shot my brother... 658 00:36:46,869 --> 00:36:48,962 And I'm the man 659 00:36:49,038 --> 00:36:50,471 who's going to destroy you... 660 00:36:50,539 --> 00:36:52,405 'Cause I'm just that kind of guy. 661 00:36:52,475 --> 00:36:53,736 How 'bout that? 662 00:37:03,319 --> 00:37:05,377 Hey, what are you doing here? 663 00:37:05,454 --> 00:37:07,081 Uh, oh, I was just, uh... 664 00:37:07,156 --> 00:37:09,785 Well, at least you're not in the vault. 665 00:37:09,859 --> 00:37:12,259 What would I be doing in the vault? 666 00:37:12,328 --> 00:37:14,956 Who knows why you're there every morning? 667 00:37:15,031 --> 00:37:16,226 Yeah, right. 668 00:37:16,300 --> 00:37:19,234 Well, how do I get in there, you suppose? 669 00:37:19,302 --> 00:37:20,997 I don't know. 670 00:37:21,071 --> 00:37:23,383 Hey, whats the matter with your voice? You sound different. 671 00:37:23,407 --> 00:37:26,205 Oh, I've got a little laryngitis. 672 00:37:26,277 --> 00:37:27,403 Hmm, I'm sorry. 673 00:37:27,478 --> 00:37:29,138 Hey, I wouldn't let Mr. Pendlesmythe 674 00:37:29,212 --> 00:37:30,839 catch me in his chair if I were you, 675 00:37:30,914 --> 00:37:32,576 and I'd get my feet off his desk 676 00:37:32,650 --> 00:37:34,970 because you know how he feels about his famous golf trophy. 677 00:37:35,019 --> 00:37:36,748 Yeah. 678 00:37:36,821 --> 00:37:38,152 You know, by the way, 679 00:37:38,222 --> 00:37:40,747 I had a real nice time the other night. 680 00:37:40,825 --> 00:37:43,020 I think it was really good for me 681 00:37:43,094 --> 00:37:46,690 to just get away from work and just have some fun. 682 00:37:46,765 --> 00:37:50,098 Yeah, I had a nice time, too, baby. 683 00:37:50,168 --> 00:37:51,726 "Baby"? 684 00:37:51,803 --> 00:37:55,364 Ernest, sometimes you can be so weird. 685 00:37:57,275 --> 00:37:59,209 Good morning, Miss Sparrow. 686 00:37:59,277 --> 00:38:00,574 Good morning. 687 00:38:00,645 --> 00:38:02,045 And what are we doing 688 00:38:02,115 --> 00:38:04,639 behind the bank presidents desk? 689 00:38:04,716 --> 00:38:07,184 I was just gonna leave you a note. 690 00:38:07,252 --> 00:38:09,049 About what? 691 00:38:09,121 --> 00:38:10,817 About, um... 692 00:38:10,890 --> 00:38:12,983 Uh, Ernest wants to formally apply 693 00:38:13,059 --> 00:38:14,390 for that clerk's job. 694 00:38:15,528 --> 00:38:16,994 Yeah, yeah, thats it. 695 00:38:17,062 --> 00:38:20,294 Ha. I see... Ernest the clerk. 696 00:38:20,399 --> 00:38:22,731 Hmm. What a great idea. 697 00:38:22,802 --> 00:38:25,397 Well, now you don't have to leave a note, do you? 698 00:38:25,472 --> 00:38:26,632 So get out from there! 699 00:38:26,707 --> 00:38:28,901 Whats the matter with your hair? 700 00:38:28,975 --> 00:38:31,375 Is that some sort of punk thing, huh? 701 00:38:31,444 --> 00:38:33,504 I was just trying something new. 702 00:38:33,580 --> 00:38:35,013 Just look at you. 703 00:38:35,082 --> 00:38:37,516 You are a poor excuse for a member of the human race. 704 00:38:37,584 --> 00:38:39,313 You and that big nose and ugly face 705 00:38:39,386 --> 00:38:40,797 have caused so much trouble around here, 706 00:38:40,821 --> 00:38:43,312 I should be given a medal for tolerating you. 707 00:38:45,392 --> 00:38:48,385 I would choose my words differently if I were you. 708 00:38:48,463 --> 00:38:51,227 Oh? Should I use smaller ones? 709 00:38:51,299 --> 00:38:52,663 How 'bout this? 710 00:38:52,733 --> 00:38:53,825 No! 711 00:38:53,901 --> 00:38:57,497 Now get out of my office, both of you! 712 00:39:06,781 --> 00:39:08,715 Oh, I'm sorry, Ernest. 713 00:39:08,783 --> 00:39:10,751 He promised he wasn't gonna do that. 714 00:39:10,819 --> 00:39:13,220 Well... well, who cares what he thinks anyway? 715 00:39:13,289 --> 00:39:15,222 I'm really proud of you for trying. 716 00:39:15,290 --> 00:39:17,850 I mean, you're starting to take stock of yourself. 717 00:39:17,926 --> 00:39:20,794 When you were in there talking to Mr. Pendlesmythe, 718 00:39:20,863 --> 00:39:23,331 it was as if you were a whole different person. 719 00:39:23,399 --> 00:39:24,730 What do you mean? 720 00:39:24,800 --> 00:39:27,394 Well, I-I mean that I'm proud of you. 721 00:39:31,407 --> 00:39:33,602 Ernest, do you have any idea 722 00:39:33,676 --> 00:39:37,272 how long you've made me and Bobby wait in that van? 723 00:39:38,848 --> 00:39:40,338 7.5 minutes. 724 00:39:40,416 --> 00:39:42,351 I want to tell you something about time. 725 00:39:42,419 --> 00:39:43,818 My time is worth money, 726 00:39:43,887 --> 00:39:47,220 and I don't think you make that kind of money 727 00:39:47,290 --> 00:39:50,158 to pay me for my time. 728 00:39:50,228 --> 00:39:53,219 Now, lets put the hammer down. 729 00:39:56,032 --> 00:40:01,369 Okay, today will be your first test as Mr. Nash. 730 00:40:01,439 --> 00:40:02,769 Don't worry, fellas, 731 00:40:02,839 --> 00:40:05,400 you are talking to a consummate actor, 732 00:40:05,476 --> 00:40:08,570 a brilliant interpreter of character and nuance, 733 00:40:08,646 --> 00:40:10,375 a professional practitioner 734 00:40:10,448 --> 00:40:15,476 in the style and method of the great Stradivarius. 735 00:40:15,553 --> 00:40:17,987 Man: Bring the sheets back over in the corner. 736 00:40:18,055 --> 00:40:19,283 Just pile them up. 737 00:40:19,357 --> 00:40:20,985 Yeah, just throw 'em anywhere. 738 00:40:21,059 --> 00:40:24,119 Man ♪2: Hey, Jesus, don't overstuff the machine again. 739 00:40:24,196 --> 00:40:27,062 Man ♪3: Hey, Bill, we need more starch over here. 740 00:40:27,131 --> 00:40:28,929 Man ♪4: All right, come on. 741 00:40:29,001 --> 00:40:31,401 You got something on your shirt? 742 00:40:31,470 --> 00:40:32,869 Ah heh heh heh heh. 743 00:40:36,476 --> 00:40:39,103 Today's the day, Nash. My boy's ready. 744 00:40:39,177 --> 00:40:40,439 Not now, Vinny. 745 00:40:40,512 --> 00:40:43,072 Mr. Nash doesn't have anything to prove. 746 00:40:43,148 --> 00:40:44,514 Everybody's waiting. 747 00:40:44,584 --> 00:40:47,451 You're not gonna chicken out now, are you? 748 00:40:47,520 --> 00:40:50,647 I don't know the meaning of the word "chicken." 749 00:40:50,722 --> 00:40:53,658 Man: If you lose this one, Nash, 750 00:40:53,726 --> 00:40:56,217 we're gonna run things. 751 00:40:56,296 --> 00:41:00,165 I know you've never lost, Nash... yet, 752 00:41:00,234 --> 00:41:03,999 but my man Spider here is gonna change all that. 753 00:41:05,104 --> 00:41:07,505 Okay? 754 00:41:07,574 --> 00:41:09,132 - Go! - Grrr! 755 00:41:09,209 --> 00:41:11,177 Ernest: Wait a minute! 756 00:41:11,245 --> 00:41:13,872 I wasn't even ready! Thats not fair! 757 00:41:13,947 --> 00:41:16,439 Listen, where I come from, mister, 758 00:41:16,517 --> 00:41:19,384 you're supposed to say, "Ready, set, go." 759 00:41:19,453 --> 00:41:23,220 Thats the official way, and I want a rematch. 760 00:41:23,291 --> 00:41:25,485 Nash, you're a glutton for punishment. 761 00:41:25,559 --> 00:41:27,618 You're in way over your head, man. 762 00:41:27,695 --> 00:41:29,526 They're gonna figure you out. 763 00:41:29,596 --> 00:41:31,895 He was just lucky. I can take this guy. 764 00:41:35,236 --> 00:41:38,672 Man: Okay, here we go. 765 00:41:38,740 --> 00:41:41,402 Ready... set... 766 00:41:42,777 --> 00:41:43,777 go! 767 00:41:44,879 --> 00:41:46,438 Come on, man! Come on, baby! 768 00:41:46,515 --> 00:41:47,675 Come on, Spider! 769 00:41:47,750 --> 00:41:48,909 Come on, baby! 770 00:41:48,984 --> 00:41:51,077 Come on, Spider! Come on, man! 771 00:41:51,152 --> 00:41:53,052 Right there, right there, right there! 772 00:41:54,156 --> 00:41:57,557 Come on, Spider. Come on, baby. 773 00:42:00,362 --> 00:42:01,091 Smoke? 774 00:42:01,163 --> 00:42:02,027 Man: Aw, man! 775 00:42:02,098 --> 00:42:03,565 That was close. 776 00:42:03,632 --> 00:42:05,759 Next case. 777 00:42:07,837 --> 00:42:09,897 Man, why don't you shut your mouth? 778 00:42:09,973 --> 00:42:11,940 The real Mr. Nash don't say much. 779 00:42:12,008 --> 00:42:13,873 Well, maybe he ought to, right? 780 00:42:13,943 --> 00:42:17,004 I mean, after all, I'm just reaching for the character. 781 00:42:17,080 --> 00:42:18,945 What do you know about the pain 782 00:42:19,016 --> 00:42:20,677 an actor must go through... 783 00:42:20,751 --> 00:42:23,117 You straighten up, or I'll show you pain, 784 00:42:23,186 --> 00:42:24,448 and don't you forget 785 00:42:24,521 --> 00:42:27,456 your loved ones on the outside. 786 00:42:33,664 --> 00:42:36,063 Chuck: Ernest, Ernest, we're sorry. 787 00:42:36,133 --> 00:42:38,897 Bobby didn't know the mace can was loaded. 788 00:42:38,969 --> 00:42:41,962 Bobby, how many times do I have to tell you... 789 00:42:42,040 --> 00:42:43,974 Yuh! Get off me, you mutt! 790 00:42:44,042 --> 00:42:46,272 Get out of here! 791 00:43:04,363 --> 00:43:05,728 This is pathetic. 792 00:43:05,798 --> 00:43:08,232 This guy's better off in jail. 793 00:43:09,535 --> 00:43:11,162 Whoa! Ugh! 794 00:43:12,204 --> 00:43:13,296 Ugh! 795 00:43:22,414 --> 00:43:23,540 Oof! 796 00:43:23,615 --> 00:43:24,809 Eee! 797 00:43:27,620 --> 00:43:31,078 I will effect my escape using a bar of soap, 798 00:43:31,157 --> 00:43:34,059 a common, ordinary household spoon, 799 00:43:34,128 --> 00:43:36,061 and a tin of shoe polish. 800 00:43:36,129 --> 00:43:39,656 Thank goodness I paid attention in art class. 801 00:43:39,732 --> 00:43:43,134 Don't worry, Charlotte, I'll save you. 802 00:43:43,204 --> 00:43:45,331 Your hero is on his way. 803 00:43:53,080 --> 00:43:55,014 Hey, screw! 804 00:43:55,082 --> 00:43:56,675 Yeah, you! 805 00:43:56,751 --> 00:43:57,751 Come here! 806 00:43:57,818 --> 00:43:59,183 What now, Nash? 807 00:43:59,253 --> 00:44:02,814 Open the door or I'll waste ya. 808 00:44:04,058 --> 00:44:05,321 Ah heh heh heh heh. 809 00:44:05,393 --> 00:44:07,691 Assault rifle on a rope, the perfect gift 810 00:44:07,762 --> 00:44:09,888 for the mercenary who has everything. 811 00:44:09,964 --> 00:44:11,956 Ah ha ha ha ha. Ah ha. 812 00:44:12,033 --> 00:44:13,762 Man: Shut up! 813 00:44:13,835 --> 00:44:15,769 Chuck: Mr. P.! 814 00:44:15,837 --> 00:44:18,704 Mr. P., could I have just one moment 815 00:44:18,773 --> 00:44:20,901 of your time, sir, please? 816 00:44:20,977 --> 00:44:23,706 I want to introduce you to our latest arsenal 817 00:44:23,778 --> 00:44:25,245 in the war against crime. 818 00:44:25,313 --> 00:44:26,371 Look... 819 00:44:26,448 --> 00:44:29,680 Eh! Mr. P., its very, very special. 820 00:44:29,752 --> 00:44:33,346 Well... all right, but I'm late for dinner. 821 00:44:33,421 --> 00:44:35,049 Great. You'll eat. 822 00:44:35,124 --> 00:44:38,252 Just follow me, please, sir. 823 00:44:38,327 --> 00:44:41,194 Okay, can I have you here, please? Thank you. 824 00:44:41,264 --> 00:44:43,199 You won't be needing this. Lets... lets go. 825 00:44:43,267 --> 00:44:46,030 Lets open up. Open up. Thank you. 826 00:44:46,102 --> 00:44:47,763 Bobby... 827 00:44:48,371 --> 00:44:49,599 Please. 828 00:44:54,378 --> 00:44:57,141 Mr. P., do you have that funny, little acidy taste 829 00:44:57,213 --> 00:44:59,478 in the back of your throat... like that? 830 00:44:59,550 --> 00:45:01,142 Uh-huh. 831 00:45:01,218 --> 00:45:02,862 Can you taste it? Do you know what that is? 832 00:45:02,886 --> 00:45:03,978 Unh-unh. 833 00:45:04,054 --> 00:45:05,180 Fear. 834 00:45:05,255 --> 00:45:07,451 Thats what your common, class-X criminal 835 00:45:07,525 --> 00:45:09,253 would be feeling at this moment 836 00:45:09,326 --> 00:45:10,953 if he were in your situation. 837 00:45:11,028 --> 00:45:13,019 - Oh. - Bobby... 838 00:45:13,096 --> 00:45:14,792 its only a simulation. 839 00:45:16,968 --> 00:45:19,698 I don't think I'd touch those bars, Mr. P., 840 00:45:19,771 --> 00:45:22,239 unless you want 200,000 volts of electricity 841 00:45:22,307 --> 00:45:23,797 jolting through your body. 842 00:45:23,875 --> 00:45:25,137 Think about that. 843 00:45:26,644 --> 00:45:27,736 Bobby... 844 00:45:33,785 --> 00:45:36,310 Mr. P., uh, have a nice dinner 845 00:45:36,387 --> 00:45:42,190 and a... and a good nights sleep... sir. 846 00:45:42,261 --> 00:45:45,594 Eh, he's had a real hard day. 847 00:45:51,036 --> 00:45:52,629 Ernest: Don't worry, Charlotte, 848 00:45:52,706 --> 00:45:54,401 I'll soon be flying into your arms 849 00:45:54,474 --> 00:45:56,998 with my superior knowledge of mathematics and geometry. 850 00:45:57,076 --> 00:45:59,978 The square root and angle of your lower hypotenuse 851 00:46:00,046 --> 00:46:03,174 times the angle of your pi... and that sort of thing. 852 00:46:03,250 --> 00:46:05,514 Let the countdown begin. 853 00:46:05,585 --> 00:46:09,112 3... 2... 11/2... 854 00:46:09,189 --> 00:46:11,589 1... 3/4... 855 00:46:11,658 --> 00:46:13,683 zero... fire! 856 00:46:15,529 --> 00:46:16,996 Whaaaaa! 857 00:47:27,071 --> 00:47:31,598 You see, casting is all in the wrist. 858 00:47:31,674 --> 00:47:33,768 Its a sport of kings, 859 00:47:33,844 --> 00:47:35,471 a game of inches. 860 00:47:38,949 --> 00:47:41,884 And as soon as your game fish takes the bait, 861 00:47:41,952 --> 00:47:47,515 'tis important to give the line a sharp tug in order to set the hook, 862 00:47:47,591 --> 00:47:49,389 and then quickly reel it in. 863 00:47:51,463 --> 00:47:54,056 Ha ha ha ha! 864 00:47:59,137 --> 00:48:00,468 Ah heh heh heh heh heh. 865 00:48:00,505 --> 00:48:02,496 I was gonna throw it back, honest. 866 00:48:03,876 --> 00:48:05,002 Nooo! 867 00:48:05,077 --> 00:48:06,805 That ought to hold ya. 868 00:48:06,878 --> 00:48:09,676 Don't you have anything in a pastel blue? 869 00:48:10,916 --> 00:48:13,146 Accessories are so important. 870 00:48:14,420 --> 00:48:17,820 Accessories! 871 00:48:27,634 --> 00:48:31,569 The way they run this institution is an outrage 872 00:48:31,637 --> 00:48:34,937 for a poor, tired, old, lonely woman like me, 873 00:48:35,008 --> 00:48:36,600 her only son a felon, 874 00:48:36,676 --> 00:48:39,543 though not a terribly successful one. 875 00:48:39,613 --> 00:48:42,605 Young man... 876 00:48:42,682 --> 00:48:44,274 Young man. 877 00:48:44,351 --> 00:48:46,876 Young man, could you please open that gate? 878 00:48:46,953 --> 00:48:48,853 I left my car running outside. 879 00:48:48,922 --> 00:48:51,949 Ma'am, can you tell me how you got through this gate? 880 00:48:52,026 --> 00:48:54,357 The visitors' area is on the other side of the prison. 881 00:48:54,428 --> 00:48:56,623 I brought him up as best I could, 882 00:48:56,696 --> 00:48:58,426 but sometimes a bad seed 883 00:48:58,499 --> 00:49:01,059 falls from even the most fragile flower. 884 00:49:01,135 --> 00:49:02,775 Ma'am, you're not going through this gate. 885 00:49:02,804 --> 00:49:05,204 Is this the way you treat your mother? 886 00:49:05,273 --> 00:49:06,763 Is this the kind of abuse 887 00:49:06,841 --> 00:49:08,741 that poor woman must endure? 888 00:49:08,810 --> 00:49:10,903 Well, I guess my mother is a little bit mad... 889 00:49:10,978 --> 00:49:12,913 Mm-hmm. You ought to be in the slammer 890 00:49:12,981 --> 00:49:15,415 with the rest of these misfits. 891 00:49:15,484 --> 00:49:18,748 If you had any remorse at all for the horror 892 00:49:18,820 --> 00:49:20,311 you put your own mother through, 893 00:49:20,389 --> 00:49:21,981 you'd open that gate. 894 00:49:22,057 --> 00:49:24,992 I have a car overheating as we speak. 895 00:49:27,895 --> 00:49:30,456 Okay, okay! 896 00:49:30,532 --> 00:49:32,864 Lets open the east gate! 897 00:49:32,935 --> 00:49:34,800 There, now are you satisfied? 898 00:49:34,870 --> 00:49:38,034 I'll tell your mother how her son has improved 899 00:49:38,107 --> 00:49:41,303 despite his shaded and somewhat checkered past. 900 00:49:44,581 --> 00:49:49,041 The doctor told me I'd only have to wear these 901 00:49:49,118 --> 00:49:50,710 until after the surgery. 902 00:49:50,787 --> 00:49:51,913 Oh! Oh! Oh! 903 00:49:55,391 --> 00:49:59,021 Ernest, since you're part of the night family 904 00:49:59,096 --> 00:50:00,256 here at the bank, 905 00:50:00,331 --> 00:50:04,130 I'm gonna show you something new. 906 00:50:05,768 --> 00:50:07,634 You see that? 907 00:50:07,705 --> 00:50:12,404 That is only to be used during an officer-in-distress situation. 908 00:50:12,476 --> 00:50:14,068 Do you understand? 909 00:50:14,144 --> 00:50:15,577 Which, I might add, 910 00:50:15,646 --> 00:50:18,342 we hope will be few and far between. 911 00:50:19,950 --> 00:50:23,717 What could happen in a quiet, little bank like this? 912 00:50:23,788 --> 00:50:26,382 Eh... will you take the edge off, Bobby? 913 00:50:26,458 --> 00:50:29,757 I mean... Hey, Bobby! If I was going by the book, 914 00:50:29,828 --> 00:50:31,887 I wouldn't have said anything, 915 00:50:31,963 --> 00:50:33,294 but its only Ernest! 916 00:50:33,365 --> 00:50:35,731 Ha ha ha! He... Bobby! 917 00:50:37,296 --> 00:50:39,730 Well, Mr. Nash, how's our special prisoner? 918 00:50:39,799 --> 00:50:40,959 Just fine, thanks. 919 00:50:41,033 --> 00:50:43,763 Of course, the place could be a little homier. 920 00:50:43,836 --> 00:50:45,168 Maybe some curtains... 921 00:50:45,239 --> 00:50:47,707 I don't need nothin' from nobody. 922 00:50:47,774 --> 00:50:50,106 I especially don't need nothin' 923 00:50:50,177 --> 00:50:51,666 from no lousy screws. 924 00:50:51,744 --> 00:50:54,509 Tough guy... right to the end, huh, Nash? 925 00:50:54,581 --> 00:50:56,674 Just about 24 hours to go. 926 00:50:56,750 --> 00:50:59,776 Well, yeah, whats it to you, warden? 927 00:50:59,853 --> 00:51:03,186 Besides, I'll be getting out of here soon. 928 00:51:03,257 --> 00:51:05,589 Yeah, you'll be getting out all right... 929 00:51:05,659 --> 00:51:07,957 horizontally. 930 00:51:11,299 --> 00:51:14,699 Man: Close cellblock "C." 931 00:51:14,768 --> 00:51:17,499 Did you hear that? I'll be getting out in 24 hours. 932 00:51:17,572 --> 00:51:20,063 You just have to know how to talk to these people. 933 00:51:20,141 --> 00:51:25,512 Don't worry, Rubin, I'll put in a good word for you, too. 934 00:51:25,581 --> 00:51:26,808 Mr. P. Mr. P. 935 00:51:26,881 --> 00:51:29,281 Can I talk... wait, wait. 936 00:51:29,350 --> 00:51:32,684 Hey, can I... can I talk to you for just one second? 937 00:51:32,755 --> 00:51:34,120 What is it now? 938 00:51:34,189 --> 00:51:36,214 Lets go this way, please. 939 00:51:38,126 --> 00:51:42,826 Mr. P., I want to talk to you about laser beams... 940 00:51:42,898 --> 00:51:46,334 little bundles of light that can actually trigger 941 00:51:46,402 --> 00:51:49,929 a high-tech, state-of-the-art security device. 942 00:51:50,005 --> 00:51:53,031 Bobby... please. 943 00:51:54,711 --> 00:51:55,711 So? 944 00:51:55,745 --> 00:51:58,145 Whats the matter with it? 945 00:51:58,214 --> 00:52:00,114 Pbht! Nothin'! Thats the beauty of it. 946 00:52:00,183 --> 00:52:03,243 Now, Mr. P., could I just have your attention this way, please, sir? 947 00:52:04,421 --> 00:52:06,582 Please, Mr. P., come this way. 948 00:52:09,559 --> 00:52:11,960 Ohh. 949 00:52:12,029 --> 00:52:13,359 Oooh. 950 00:52:13,430 --> 00:52:16,058 Space-age plastics at work for you, Mr. P. 951 00:52:16,132 --> 00:52:19,000 Its invisible, tasteless, odorless, colorless. 952 00:52:19,070 --> 00:52:23,632 And the best news yet, sir... its bulletproof. 953 00:52:23,708 --> 00:52:25,869 Bobby, if you... please! 954 00:52:28,412 --> 00:52:29,572 No! 955 00:52:43,095 --> 00:52:46,223 Uhhhh. 956 00:52:46,298 --> 00:52:47,390 Uh, y... 957 00:52:47,466 --> 00:52:49,058 Its got a few bugs there, Mr. P., 958 00:52:49,134 --> 00:52:50,761 but you get the basic idea, right? 959 00:52:53,372 --> 00:52:54,930 Help me get this off of him. 960 00:52:55,006 --> 00:52:56,804 Mr. P.'s a very rich and busy man. 961 00:52:58,644 --> 00:53:00,270 Ernest: 24 hours, Lyle. 962 00:53:00,345 --> 00:53:04,282 I'm outta here in 24 hours, and, boy, am I ever glad. 963 00:53:04,350 --> 00:53:08,013 This hasn't been a really bad experience, though. 964 00:53:08,087 --> 00:53:09,918 I mean, the food's good, 965 00:53:09,989 --> 00:53:12,480 and I met a lot of new friends. 966 00:53:12,558 --> 00:53:16,221 But now I'm ready to go back to my job and my dog. 967 00:53:16,295 --> 00:53:18,058 You know, I got a feeling 968 00:53:18,131 --> 00:53:21,727 everything's gonna turn out all right from now on. 969 00:53:23,536 --> 00:53:27,667 You know, Lyle, its really good to be alive. 970 00:53:33,614 --> 00:53:36,981 Whats bothering him? 971 00:53:39,720 --> 00:53:41,813 Ernest, I can't believe this. 972 00:53:41,889 --> 00:53:43,619 This place is spotless. 973 00:53:43,691 --> 00:53:45,283 I am so proud of you. 974 00:53:45,360 --> 00:53:48,021 Has the value of pride diminished? 975 00:53:48,095 --> 00:53:49,392 What? 976 00:53:49,463 --> 00:53:52,433 Well, the last time you were proud of me, 977 00:53:52,500 --> 00:53:53,831 I got a kiss. 978 00:53:58,040 --> 00:54:03,477 Mr. Pendlesmythe: Ernest, I want to see you in my office. 979 00:54:08,717 --> 00:54:11,014 Well, Ernest, you've made a drastic improvement 980 00:54:11,085 --> 00:54:12,712 in your job performance. 981 00:54:12,787 --> 00:54:15,222 And so I've decided to take Miss Sparrow's recommendation. 982 00:54:15,291 --> 00:54:17,691 You'll be joining us working days as a bank clerk. 983 00:54:17,760 --> 00:54:21,356 So, Ernest, do you have anything to say? 984 00:54:23,232 --> 00:54:26,690 Mr. Pendlesmythe: You idiot! You smashed my golf trophy! 985 00:54:26,769 --> 00:54:27,861 Get out of here! 986 00:54:27,937 --> 00:54:29,166 Gosh, Mr. Pendlesmythe, 987 00:54:29,239 --> 00:54:31,230 does this mean I don't get the job? 988 00:54:31,308 --> 00:54:35,334 "Don't get the job"? I may have you shot! 989 00:54:39,449 --> 00:54:40,381 Ernest... 990 00:54:40,450 --> 00:54:41,678 Did you see his face? 991 00:54:41,751 --> 00:54:43,946 You didn't do that on purpose? 992 00:54:44,020 --> 00:54:45,283 He'll get over it. 993 00:54:45,356 --> 00:54:47,721 Ernest, what has gotten into you? 994 00:54:47,791 --> 00:54:49,224 Look, we got to talk. 995 00:54:49,292 --> 00:54:52,126 Okay. How 'bout tonight? 996 00:54:52,196 --> 00:54:55,256 But itll have to be early. 997 00:54:55,333 --> 00:54:57,392 Why? You have a lot to clean? 998 00:54:57,468 --> 00:54:58,661 Yeah. 999 00:54:58,735 --> 00:55:02,001 Tonight I'm gonna clean out the whole place. 1000 00:55:06,644 --> 00:55:10,239 Man: Open C-12. 1001 00:55:16,021 --> 00:55:19,388 Warden: Nash, your lawyer's got something to tell you. 1002 00:55:19,458 --> 00:55:21,652 I'm afraid I've got some bad news, Mr. Nash. 1003 00:55:21,726 --> 00:55:23,388 Our last appeal was turned down. 1004 00:55:23,462 --> 00:55:25,225 It was our final hope. 1005 00:55:25,297 --> 00:55:28,733 I'm afraid there's nothing more we can do. 1006 00:55:28,800 --> 00:55:30,894 Come on, Nash. Lets go. 1007 00:55:30,970 --> 00:55:32,096 Go? Go where? 1008 00:55:32,171 --> 00:55:33,467 You're going to the row. 1009 00:55:33,539 --> 00:55:35,234 The row? Well, whats that? 1010 00:55:35,307 --> 00:55:38,641 As in death. You know, death row. 1011 00:55:38,711 --> 00:55:40,804 Oh, well... death row?! 1012 00:55:40,880 --> 00:55:43,849 You mean like the chair? The hot seat? 1013 00:55:43,917 --> 00:55:45,908 Dead meat, deep six, its over, pal, 1014 00:55:45,985 --> 00:55:47,282 you're outta here, bub, 1015 00:55:47,353 --> 00:55:49,344 the groundhogs are bringing your mail, 1016 00:55:49,422 --> 00:55:51,356 you're picking turnips with a stepladder, 1017 00:55:51,424 --> 00:55:54,588 like the no-tomorrow row, that kind of row? 1018 00:55:54,662 --> 00:55:57,391 Oh, no. The row?! Uh, but, uh... 1019 00:55:57,463 --> 00:55:59,556 You've got to tell them who I am, fellas. 1020 00:55:59,632 --> 00:56:01,999 I'm Ernest P. Worrell. I'm not Nash. 1021 00:56:02,069 --> 00:56:03,195 I'm Ernest. 1022 00:56:03,270 --> 00:56:05,830 Zip it up, Nash. Get him outta here. 1023 00:56:05,906 --> 00:56:07,806 Warden, you're gonna feel terrible 1024 00:56:07,875 --> 00:56:09,319 when you find out what a big mistake you made. 1025 00:56:09,343 --> 00:56:12,210 And, you, pal, you're not getting any more of my business. 1026 00:56:12,279 --> 00:56:14,110 I'm not Nash, I tell you. I'm Ernest. 1027 00:56:14,181 --> 00:56:17,174 I'm Ernest P. Worrell. 1028 00:56:17,252 --> 00:56:19,447 Close "C" block. 1029 00:56:20,988 --> 00:56:22,979 Come in. 1030 00:56:23,057 --> 00:56:27,051 ♪ Two hearts racing toward love... ♪ 1031 00:56:34,169 --> 00:56:37,366 ♪ Two lips trembling... ♪ 1032 00:56:37,439 --> 00:56:39,498 Ernest, this wasn't what I expected. 1033 00:56:39,574 --> 00:56:42,476 Its, um, I-its different. 1034 00:56:42,545 --> 00:56:44,273 Have a drink. 1035 00:56:44,346 --> 00:56:47,544 Oh. Okay, sure. Why not? 1036 00:56:47,617 --> 00:56:50,814 Uh, sit down. Make yourself more comfortable. 1037 00:56:50,886 --> 00:56:54,344 ♪... Burning in the night... ♪ 1038 00:56:54,423 --> 00:56:57,881 A toast... to the successful completion 1039 00:56:57,960 --> 00:57:00,758 of all of tonights endeavors. 1040 00:57:00,830 --> 00:57:04,096 To a long and happy life. 1041 00:57:04,167 --> 00:57:05,464 I'm up for that. 1042 00:57:05,535 --> 00:57:07,264 Um, Ernest, I-I didn't come here to have... 1043 00:57:07,337 --> 00:57:09,270 I was... just wanted to speak to you 1044 00:57:09,338 --> 00:57:11,364 about what happened at the bank today. 1045 00:57:11,441 --> 00:57:13,170 We can talk later. 1046 00:57:13,243 --> 00:57:14,175 Ernest. 1047 00:57:14,244 --> 00:57:15,836 Ernest, stop it! 1048 00:57:15,912 --> 00:57:17,174 What has gotten into you?! 1049 00:57:17,247 --> 00:57:18,408 Stop it! 1050 00:57:18,483 --> 00:57:19,710 Get off me! 1051 00:57:23,086 --> 00:57:27,023 Get away from me, you mangy little mutt! 1052 00:57:27,091 --> 00:57:31,823 You are slimers, P. Worrell! 1053 00:57:37,635 --> 00:57:40,035 Here, you little rat ball. 1054 00:57:53,619 --> 00:57:57,578 So its come to this. 1055 00:57:57,656 --> 00:58:04,357 A pointless, miserable end to a shallow, meaningless life. 1056 00:58:04,430 --> 00:58:07,263 But its as it should be. 1057 00:58:07,332 --> 00:58:10,631 Its the hand I've been dealt, 1058 00:58:10,703 --> 00:58:14,697 and I have to play it as it lays. 1059 00:58:14,774 --> 00:58:16,071 Oh, I'm not going to cry 1060 00:58:16,142 --> 00:58:18,042 because life's thrown me a curve. 1061 00:58:18,110 --> 00:58:23,014 I'm... I'm not going to whine because I got mashed potatoes 1062 00:58:23,083 --> 00:58:27,144 when French fries is what I really wanted. 1063 00:58:27,220 --> 00:58:32,248 Its time for me to... step up to the plate, 1064 00:58:32,325 --> 00:58:34,816 belly up to the bar! 1065 00:58:34,894 --> 00:58:40,663 Its time for me to look fate square in the eye, 1066 00:58:40,735 --> 00:58:45,365 flare my nostrils, breathe life's last breath! 1067 00:58:45,439 --> 00:58:49,500 Its time for me to lie down with lions 1068 00:58:49,577 --> 00:58:52,513 so I can soar with the eagles! 1069 00:58:52,581 --> 00:58:53,842 All right! 1070 00:58:53,914 --> 00:58:55,211 I'm ready! 1071 00:58:55,282 --> 00:58:57,079 Come and get me! 1072 00:58:57,151 --> 00:58:58,619 Lets do it! 1073 00:58:58,687 --> 00:59:01,656 Come on, Nash. Its time. 1074 00:59:01,723 --> 00:59:07,593 I don't wanna die. 1075 00:59:36,859 --> 00:59:38,020 Is it fixed yet? 1076 00:59:38,095 --> 00:59:39,095 No. 1077 00:59:39,129 --> 00:59:40,391 Would you like a cigarette 1078 00:59:40,464 --> 00:59:42,454 or a blindfold or something? 1079 00:59:42,532 --> 00:59:47,061 No, I'm afraid of the dark, and cigarettes will kill you. 1080 00:59:49,173 --> 00:59:51,141 Maybe a few last words. 1081 00:59:51,208 --> 00:59:53,972 Nash, take it like a man. 1082 00:59:54,044 --> 00:59:57,343 But I'm not Nash. I'm Ernest. 1083 01:00:00,117 --> 01:00:04,054 "And what is an Ernest?" You might ask. 1084 01:00:04,122 --> 01:00:09,185 A man with a past rich in both history and tradition. 1085 01:00:09,260 --> 01:00:14,664 Should we punish this man for crimes he did not commit? 1086 01:00:14,732 --> 01:00:17,030 No, no, no, no, no, no. 1087 01:00:17,101 --> 01:00:18,659 Can't you speed things up? 1088 01:00:18,736 --> 01:00:20,101 Okay, okay. 1089 01:00:20,171 --> 01:00:23,835 Such a man should be set... free. 1090 01:00:47,634 --> 01:00:48,634 Oh! 1091 01:00:55,942 --> 01:00:57,034 Hit the alarm! 1092 01:00:57,110 --> 01:00:58,236 Run for it! 1093 01:00:59,446 --> 01:01:00,913 Lets go! 1094 01:01:06,286 --> 01:01:09,449 Whats wrong with the door?! 1095 01:01:09,522 --> 01:01:11,957 Whoa! 1096 01:01:12,026 --> 01:01:13,926 Thanks, Nash! 1097 01:01:20,368 --> 01:01:22,199 Man: There's been a breach in security. 1098 01:01:22,270 --> 01:01:24,898 All guards to your emergency stations. 1099 01:01:26,475 --> 01:01:28,408 Hey, whats going on here?! 1100 01:01:28,476 --> 01:01:31,707 All prisoners, return to your cells. 1101 01:01:31,779 --> 01:01:33,179 Return to your... 1102 01:01:33,248 --> 01:01:35,842 Lets go, Lyle. 1103 01:01:35,918 --> 01:01:38,818 Get outta my way! 1104 01:01:38,886 --> 01:01:39,944 There he is! 1105 01:01:40,021 --> 01:01:42,456 Stop him! Fire! 1106 01:01:42,524 --> 01:01:44,617 All: Aaahhhhh! 1107 01:01:44,693 --> 01:01:45,751 Come on! Get outta here! 1108 01:01:45,827 --> 01:01:47,795 Come on! Lets go! Lets go! Lets go! 1109 01:02:08,084 --> 01:02:09,517 Cut him down now! 1110 01:02:09,585 --> 01:02:12,487 It worked before. 1111 01:02:12,556 --> 01:02:15,149 All: Aaahh! 1112 01:02:19,129 --> 01:02:20,790 Ahh! 1113 01:02:23,467 --> 01:02:25,730 Diii-ha! 1114 01:02:26,971 --> 01:02:28,336 Yihaw! Yihaw! 1115 01:02:29,740 --> 01:02:31,970 Yiiiihaww! Yihaw! 1116 01:02:32,042 --> 01:02:33,134 Ahh! 1117 01:02:33,210 --> 01:02:34,974 Open sesame. 1118 01:02:40,651 --> 01:02:41,583 Not so fast. 1119 01:02:41,652 --> 01:02:43,553 You better watch out, Rubin. 1120 01:02:43,621 --> 01:02:44,553 I'll zot you. 1121 01:02:44,622 --> 01:02:46,590 You're a dead man, Worrell. 1122 01:02:46,658 --> 01:02:48,922 Very well. You asked for it. 1123 01:02:48,994 --> 01:02:54,159 After all, I am Ernest P. Worrell, Electroman. 1124 01:03:11,917 --> 01:03:13,214 Did I ever tell you 1125 01:03:13,285 --> 01:03:16,277 that you have a really classic Greek profile? 1126 01:03:16,355 --> 01:03:17,686 Shut up. 1127 01:03:18,791 --> 01:03:20,122 Let him go. 1128 01:03:20,192 --> 01:03:24,061 Lyle, you talk. Thats great. 1129 01:03:24,131 --> 01:03:25,825 Have you flipped? Come on. 1130 01:03:25,898 --> 01:03:29,096 We got to get rid of this guy before he blows the whole thing. 1131 01:03:29,169 --> 01:03:31,034 No, he's different than us. 1132 01:03:31,104 --> 01:03:33,971 Shut up and get out of my way. 1133 01:03:34,041 --> 01:03:35,474 You better go. 1134 01:03:35,542 --> 01:03:39,478 Mr. Nash is probably robbing the bank right now. 1135 01:03:39,546 --> 01:03:40,808 Nash? 1136 01:03:40,881 --> 01:03:42,906 Well, come with me. 1137 01:03:42,983 --> 01:03:45,009 I don't belong out there. 1138 01:03:45,086 --> 01:03:46,883 I got a place in here. 1139 01:03:46,954 --> 01:03:49,945 Well, I'm gonna miss you, good buddy. 1140 01:03:50,023 --> 01:03:53,289 Ernest, things won't be the same without you, 1141 01:03:53,361 --> 01:03:54,885 you know what I mean? 1142 01:03:54,962 --> 01:03:57,487 If anybody does... 1143 01:03:58,866 --> 01:04:02,632 So long, Lyle! I'll send you a cake! 1144 01:04:02,703 --> 01:04:04,102 There he is! 1145 01:04:05,973 --> 01:04:06,973 Come on! 1146 01:04:07,042 --> 01:04:09,442 All right! We got ya! 1147 01:04:09,511 --> 01:04:11,502 Come on, Lyle. Back inside. 1148 01:04:11,580 --> 01:04:13,137 Don't let him get away. 1149 01:04:13,214 --> 01:04:14,944 Get the dogs! Come on! 1150 01:04:15,017 --> 01:04:16,416 Move it! 1151 01:04:16,485 --> 01:04:19,079 Nobody has ever escaped from this facility 1152 01:04:19,154 --> 01:04:20,519 since I've been warden, 1153 01:04:20,589 --> 01:04:22,649 and they're not gonna start now. 1154 01:04:22,725 --> 01:04:24,214 All right, lets go, men. 1155 01:04:24,293 --> 01:04:26,955 Consider the prisoner extremely dangerous. 1156 01:04:35,471 --> 01:04:38,134 What are you doing now, Ernest? 1157 01:04:43,246 --> 01:04:44,338 Thats it. 1158 01:04:44,414 --> 01:04:48,441 Is everyone who works here a moron? 1159 01:04:48,518 --> 01:04:51,112 Can't you see what I'm doing? 1160 01:04:51,187 --> 01:04:52,620 I'm robbing the bank. 1161 01:04:52,689 --> 01:04:56,592 I'm gonna blow the safe, take the money, and leave. 1162 01:04:56,660 --> 01:04:58,287 I'm robbing the bank. 1163 01:04:58,362 --> 01:05:02,355 I'm stealing the money that you are paid to protect. 1164 01:05:04,268 --> 01:05:06,065 I'm robbing the bank. 1165 01:05:06,137 --> 01:05:09,972 Ppbbhhtt! 1166 01:05:33,466 --> 01:05:36,730 I've been vandalized... 1167 01:05:36,801 --> 01:05:39,429 by Elvis. 1168 01:05:39,505 --> 01:05:42,099 I can't believe it! I can't believe it! 1169 01:05:42,175 --> 01:05:43,836 First Ernest and now this! 1170 01:05:43,910 --> 01:05:47,003 I am acting like the victim again. 1171 01:05:47,078 --> 01:05:50,173 I need to tell Ernest exactly how I feel, 1172 01:05:50,249 --> 01:05:53,946 and I need to do it right now while I'm still mad! 1173 01:05:54,020 --> 01:05:55,215 Ah. 1174 01:05:55,289 --> 01:05:57,848 Thats better. 1175 01:05:59,091 --> 01:06:01,423 Rimshot. Rimshot. Here, boy. 1176 01:06:02,663 --> 01:06:04,130 Rimshot? Rimshot. 1177 01:06:04,198 --> 01:06:06,291 Rimshot? 1178 01:06:11,305 --> 01:06:14,206 Rimshot? 1179 01:06:16,043 --> 01:06:17,772 Rimshot? 1180 01:06:17,844 --> 01:06:19,403 Rimshot. 1181 01:06:19,480 --> 01:06:20,777 Rimshot! 1182 01:06:20,848 --> 01:06:23,907 How did you get in there? 1183 01:06:23,984 --> 01:06:29,480 What kind of a person would throw away a perfectly good dog? 1184 01:06:29,557 --> 01:06:32,390 Come on, Rimshot. Lets go. 1185 01:06:53,983 --> 01:06:56,474 Don't you worry about your diet, chubby. 1186 01:06:59,655 --> 01:07:01,145 As soon as I set this fuse, 1187 01:07:01,223 --> 01:07:04,215 you're gonna lose all that weight. 1188 01:07:12,802 --> 01:07:14,963 Mr. Pendlesmythe, its Charlotte. 1189 01:07:15,038 --> 01:07:16,869 I-I know you won't believe this, 1190 01:07:16,940 --> 01:07:19,739 but it looks like Ernest is robbing the bank. 1191 01:07:19,810 --> 01:07:22,004 I know, but I am here right now. 1192 01:07:34,224 --> 01:07:36,216 Look, I don't know whats gotten into you, 1193 01:07:36,294 --> 01:07:38,023 but you can't go through with this! 1194 01:07:38,095 --> 01:07:39,027 Ernest! Ernest! 1195 01:07:39,096 --> 01:07:40,222 Look... 1196 01:07:40,298 --> 01:07:41,925 I am not this Ernest guy. 1197 01:07:41,999 --> 01:07:44,194 I just happen to look like him. 1198 01:07:44,268 --> 01:07:46,498 I switched with him, you get it? 1199 01:07:46,570 --> 01:07:47,832 You what? 1200 01:07:47,905 --> 01:07:49,304 Look, would the real Ernest 1201 01:07:49,373 --> 01:07:51,274 have been able to knock out Chuck 1202 01:07:51,343 --> 01:07:54,039 or set a time bomb without it going off in his face? 1203 01:07:54,112 --> 01:07:55,340 And look at the floors. 1204 01:07:55,414 --> 01:07:57,847 Did you notice how clean they've been lately? 1205 01:07:57,915 --> 01:07:59,747 You are an imposter. 1206 01:07:59,818 --> 01:08:03,254 What did you do with the real Ernest? 1207 01:08:03,322 --> 01:08:04,550 Where is he? 1208 01:08:04,623 --> 01:08:05,681 He's dead by now. 1209 01:08:05,757 --> 01:08:07,350 What do you mean he's dead? 1210 01:08:07,426 --> 01:08:09,792 I don't believe you! What have you done with him?! 1211 01:08:09,861 --> 01:08:11,522 I haven't done anything with him. 1212 01:08:11,596 --> 01:08:14,157 Your dedicated public servants down in the state pen 1213 01:08:14,233 --> 01:08:16,030 put him in the chair hours ago. 1214 01:08:16,102 --> 01:08:20,401 Well, I'll be seeing you, sweetheart. 1215 01:08:20,472 --> 01:08:24,239 Or rather, I'll be seeing parts of you. 1216 01:08:24,310 --> 01:08:25,538 Ha ha ha ha. 1217 01:08:25,611 --> 01:08:29,776 Parts of you... ha ha ha ha ha! 1218 01:08:42,596 --> 01:08:45,656 Shh. Rimshot, don't say a word. 1219 01:08:53,675 --> 01:08:56,609 Uh... uh. 1220 01:08:56,677 --> 01:08:58,474 Charlie! 1221 01:09:01,950 --> 01:09:03,315 Ow! 1222 01:09:03,385 --> 01:09:04,528 Chuck: Thats it. Get him in position. 1223 01:09:04,552 --> 01:09:06,485 Ow! Chuck! 1224 01:09:06,553 --> 01:09:08,283 Ow! 1225 01:09:08,356 --> 01:09:10,881 Whats gotten into you, Chuck? Its me! Ow! 1226 01:09:10,959 --> 01:09:14,122 You sure have a funny way of saying hello. 1227 01:09:14,195 --> 01:09:15,857 Do you think I'd let you get near me 1228 01:09:15,931 --> 01:09:17,398 after what you did to Ernest... 1229 01:09:17,466 --> 01:09:19,592 one of the sweetest, kindest men who ever lived? 1230 01:09:21,403 --> 01:09:24,134 Gosh, Charlotte, I-I'm touched. 1231 01:09:28,010 --> 01:09:29,307 Okay, now, listen to me. 1232 01:09:29,378 --> 01:09:30,777 When I give the signal, 1233 01:09:30,846 --> 01:09:33,337 I want you to hit him with everything we've got. 1234 01:09:33,416 --> 01:09:34,348 What? 1235 01:09:34,417 --> 01:09:35,975 Sir, we got civilians in there. 1236 01:09:40,090 --> 01:09:41,681 Worrell. 1237 01:09:41,757 --> 01:09:44,021 Nash. 1238 01:09:47,063 --> 01:09:50,624 Now, Nash, this is Warden Carmichael. Now, we've got you surrounded. 1239 01:09:50,700 --> 01:09:52,600 Come on out with your hands up. 1240 01:09:52,669 --> 01:09:55,968 Nash, let the hostages go. 1241 01:09:56,039 --> 01:09:58,906 Looks like I got myself another hostage. 1242 01:09:58,975 --> 01:10:02,969 Too bad. I thought you were dead. 1243 01:10:03,047 --> 01:10:04,309 Not yet. 1244 01:10:04,382 --> 01:10:07,179 So... it comes to this. 1245 01:10:07,250 --> 01:10:10,982 Man to man, mano a mano, 1246 01:10:11,055 --> 01:10:13,319 toe to toe, nose to nose, 1247 01:10:13,391 --> 01:10:18,385 shirts and skins, eggs over medium. 1248 01:10:18,463 --> 01:10:19,862 Be careful, Ernest! 1249 01:10:20,398 --> 01:10:21,456 Ohh! 1250 01:10:22,066 --> 01:10:23,124 Chuck: He should've ducked. 1251 01:10:23,201 --> 01:10:24,691 Here, let me help you up. 1252 01:10:24,770 --> 01:10:26,965 I want to show you your new desk. 1253 01:10:29,740 --> 01:10:31,571 Stop it! 1254 01:10:31,642 --> 01:10:33,133 - Get up. - Chuck: Yeah, stop it! 1255 01:10:34,813 --> 01:10:37,213 I can't believe I was fooled by that man. 1256 01:10:37,282 --> 01:10:38,715 I sensed it immediately. 1257 01:10:40,886 --> 01:10:43,150 Freeze, punk. 1258 01:10:43,222 --> 01:10:45,383 Make your play. 1259 01:10:45,457 --> 01:10:47,425 Chuck: All right, Bobby! Burn him! 1260 01:11:06,312 --> 01:11:09,076 What are you waiting for?! Burn him! 1261 01:11:13,254 --> 01:11:14,915 Bobby! 1262 01:11:14,989 --> 01:11:16,512 Bobby! 1263 01:11:16,589 --> 01:11:17,613 The gun! 1264 01:11:20,694 --> 01:11:22,286 Get away from there. 1265 01:11:26,033 --> 01:11:29,298 Nash: Give me that gun or I'll rip your lungs out. 1266 01:11:29,370 --> 01:11:30,564 Give it here! 1267 01:11:30,638 --> 01:11:32,037 Chuck: Bobby, go to plan 12! 1268 01:11:32,106 --> 01:11:34,974 Let go! 1269 01:11:35,443 --> 01:11:36,569 Let go. 1270 01:11:36,645 --> 01:11:38,613 Ohhh. 1271 01:11:38,680 --> 01:11:41,477 Warden: You haven't got a prayer, Nash. 1272 01:11:41,549 --> 01:11:43,313 You're completely surrounded. Give it up. 1273 01:11:43,385 --> 01:11:45,683 Chuck: Bobby! 1274 01:11:47,556 --> 01:11:48,784 What do you want me to do now? 1275 01:11:48,857 --> 01:11:50,155 Deploy them around to the back. 1276 01:11:50,226 --> 01:11:51,453 Okay, second team, lets move. 1277 01:11:51,526 --> 01:11:52,618 You heard him! Lets go! 1278 01:11:53,795 --> 01:11:54,795 Toast time. 1279 01:12:09,712 --> 01:12:12,180 It looks like one way or another, 1280 01:12:12,248 --> 01:12:14,444 this was just his night to fry. 1281 01:12:29,666 --> 01:12:31,998 I'm floating. 1282 01:12:32,069 --> 01:12:33,195 I'm lighter than air. 1283 01:12:33,270 --> 01:12:35,363 Whats happening to me? 1284 01:12:35,439 --> 01:12:38,000 He's polarized. He... he's weightless. 1285 01:12:38,076 --> 01:12:39,633 Gravity's lost its grip. 1286 01:12:39,710 --> 01:12:42,042 I'll show you polarized. 1287 01:12:42,112 --> 01:12:43,671 Ahhhhhhhh! 1288 01:12:43,748 --> 01:12:46,683 - Time to put your butt on spin cycle. - Ahhhhhhh! 1289 01:12:48,987 --> 01:12:51,113 Ahhhhhhhhhh! 1290 01:12:51,188 --> 01:12:53,316 Right down the middle. 1291 01:12:58,196 --> 01:12:59,664 Ahhhhh! 1292 01:13:00,299 --> 01:13:03,392 Ahhhhhhh! Oh, no! No! No! No! 1293 01:13:03,468 --> 01:13:04,468 Ugh! 1294 01:13:05,436 --> 01:13:06,436 Ugh! 1295 01:13:06,504 --> 01:13:07,699 Chuck! Bob...! Chuck! Bob...! 1296 01:13:07,773 --> 01:13:09,172 - Stop it! - Doh! 1297 01:13:11,477 --> 01:13:12,876 Uhhhhh! 1298 01:13:12,945 --> 01:13:13,945 Oh! 1299 01:13:15,514 --> 01:13:16,514 Uhhhhh! 1300 01:13:18,784 --> 01:13:19,784 Oh! 1301 01:13:20,285 --> 01:13:21,285 Oh! 1302 01:13:21,587 --> 01:13:22,587 Ow! 1303 01:13:22,989 --> 01:13:23,989 Oh! 1304 01:13:24,724 --> 01:13:26,315 Nash: To the moon, bozo! 1305 01:13:26,392 --> 01:13:27,757 Leave him alone! 1306 01:13:27,826 --> 01:13:29,054 Uh! 1307 01:13:29,128 --> 01:13:30,892 Chuck: Ernest, you're in control! 1308 01:13:30,964 --> 01:13:32,932 Thats it! 1309 01:13:33,900 --> 01:13:36,528 Nash, listen to me. Let the hostages go. 1310 01:13:36,603 --> 01:13:39,367 Yeah, right, warden. This'll take care of him. 1311 01:13:39,439 --> 01:13:40,906 Ernest, incoming. 1312 01:13:43,910 --> 01:13:45,742 3:00. Maybe 2:30. 1313 01:13:46,447 --> 01:13:48,108 50... 3/4... 1314 01:13:50,083 --> 01:13:52,551 Uh, uh, uh, uh. 1315 01:13:52,619 --> 01:13:55,953 Ahhhhhhh! 1316 01:13:58,459 --> 01:14:02,190 Wa-ahhhhhhhh! 1317 01:14:03,664 --> 01:14:05,291 Get this thing off of me. 1318 01:14:05,366 --> 01:14:07,027 Watch out, Ernest! He's getting up! 1319 01:14:07,101 --> 01:14:09,434 Aaaahhhhhh! 1320 01:14:09,504 --> 01:14:11,404 Chuck: Ernest, grab the lamp! 1321 01:14:11,473 --> 01:14:13,838 Be careful. Those lamps are expensive. 1322 01:14:16,611 --> 01:14:18,442 Go back to plan "B." 1323 01:14:19,514 --> 01:14:21,277 I'm gonna kill him. 1324 01:14:21,349 --> 01:14:22,349 Ahh! 1325 01:14:23,051 --> 01:14:24,575 Huh? 1326 01:14:24,653 --> 01:14:26,143 W-Whats going on in there? 1327 01:14:26,221 --> 01:14:28,212 Get your head down! Who is this guy? 1328 01:14:28,290 --> 01:14:29,450 Its my bank. 1329 01:14:29,524 --> 01:14:32,221 Peter Pan, eat your heart out. 1330 01:14:35,965 --> 01:14:38,558 Here. Have a seat. 1331 01:14:40,002 --> 01:14:41,002 Ahhhhhh! 1332 01:14:45,708 --> 01:14:46,903 Ugh! 1333 01:14:47,678 --> 01:14:49,668 Ahhhhhhhhh! 1334 01:14:51,414 --> 01:14:54,406 Ernest: Let go of me! 1335 01:14:54,484 --> 01:14:55,543 Pull on it! 1336 01:14:55,619 --> 01:14:57,143 Pull on it! Chuck! 1337 01:14:57,221 --> 01:14:58,153 I am. 1338 01:14:58,222 --> 01:15:00,655 My wrist is beginning to chafe. 1339 01:15:00,723 --> 01:15:02,247 Ernest! 1340 01:15:03,227 --> 01:15:05,695 Stop this thing! Somebody, stop... 1341 01:15:09,233 --> 01:15:12,202 Nash: Come on, get me off of this thing! 1342 01:15:14,204 --> 01:15:17,196 Hey, Nash, you'll never get him now. 1343 01:15:17,274 --> 01:15:20,244 Please be sure that your seat backs and tray tables 1344 01:15:20,311 --> 01:15:23,711 are in their full, upright, and locked positions before landing. 1345 01:15:23,781 --> 01:15:25,180 Let me off of this thing! 1346 01:15:25,249 --> 01:15:27,128 Thanks for shopping with us. Ah heh heh heh heh. 1347 01:15:27,152 --> 01:15:29,313 No, don't touch that button. 1348 01:15:29,387 --> 01:15:30,149 No! 1349 01:15:30,221 --> 01:15:31,848 Aaaahhhhh! 1350 01:15:33,057 --> 01:15:34,057 All right! 1351 01:15:35,593 --> 01:15:38,153 E-e-e-e-e-w. 1352 01:15:38,229 --> 01:15:41,393 15 seconds, Chuck! 1353 01:15:44,870 --> 01:15:48,806 Bobby, unlock me! 1354 01:15:48,874 --> 01:15:50,501 Ernest, the bomb! 1355 01:15:50,576 --> 01:15:52,510 I'm coming. 1356 01:15:52,578 --> 01:15:54,055 Don't worry, Charlotte. I'll save you. 1357 01:15:54,079 --> 01:15:55,478 Give me that. 1358 01:15:55,548 --> 01:15:59,746 Up, up, and away-y-y-y-y-y! 1359 01:16:07,661 --> 01:16:09,891 He's getting away. 1360 01:16:14,134 --> 01:16:15,226 Whoa! 1361 01:16:15,302 --> 01:16:16,530 Wow! 1362 01:16:27,849 --> 01:16:31,945 Oh... my buddy's gone. 1363 01:16:43,298 --> 01:16:45,391 He's been here all right. 1364 01:16:45,467 --> 01:16:47,195 I recognize his work. 1365 01:16:47,268 --> 01:16:49,429 Ernest saved us, Mr. Pendlesmythe. 1366 01:16:49,503 --> 01:16:52,564 He saved your stupid bank and all your stupid money. 1367 01:16:52,641 --> 01:16:54,233 Ernest wasn't a thief. He was a hero. 1368 01:16:56,111 --> 01:16:58,079 Well, maybe you're right. 1369 01:16:58,146 --> 01:16:59,146 Stick a sock in it. 1370 01:16:59,181 --> 01:17:00,273 Unh. 1371 01:17:00,349 --> 01:17:03,682 Put 'em down, boys. Nice and easy. 1372 01:17:03,752 --> 01:17:07,621 And all of you, move over there. Come on, move. 1373 01:17:07,690 --> 01:17:09,055 Nash... 1374 01:17:09,125 --> 01:17:11,092 you'll never get away with this. 1375 01:17:11,159 --> 01:17:13,286 Oh, yeah, warden? I think so. 1376 01:17:13,362 --> 01:17:16,799 She's my ticket outta here. Come over here, sweetie. 1377 01:17:16,866 --> 01:17:18,390 Ahhhhhhh! 1378 01:17:21,804 --> 01:17:25,797 Uhhhh. Uh-oh. 1379 01:17:27,176 --> 01:17:28,804 Ernest, you're alive. 1380 01:17:33,283 --> 01:17:37,277 I came. I saw. 1381 01:17:37,354 --> 01:17:40,551 I got blowed up. 1382 01:18:02,113 --> 01:18:04,104 Play it, Sam. 1383 01:18:04,182 --> 01:18:06,150 The piano will cover up the shot. 1384 01:18:07,653 --> 01:18:11,213 ♪ Don't make me climb the coconut tree ♪ 1385 01:18:11,289 --> 01:18:14,349 ♪ That would be a catastrophe ♪ 1386 01:18:14,426 --> 01:18:17,294 ♪ I would not make it halfway, you see ♪ 1387 01:18:17,363 --> 01:18:20,991 ♪ I'm wearing the wrong kind of shoes ♪ 1388 01:18:21,066 --> 01:18:24,366 ♪ Don't make me climb the coconut tree ♪ 1389 01:18:24,437 --> 01:18:27,804 ♪ I think I owe you an apology ♪ 1390 01:18:27,873 --> 01:18:30,900 ♪ But ask anyone who grew up with me ♪ 1391 01:18:30,978 --> 01:18:35,209 ♪ I'm not one to easily bruise ♪ 1392 01:18:35,281 --> 01:18:38,581 ♪ Don't make me climb ♪ 1393 01:18:38,652 --> 01:18:42,053 ♪ No, don't make me climb ♪ 1394 01:18:42,122 --> 01:18:44,351 ♪ Don't make me climb ♪ 1395 01:18:44,423 --> 01:18:47,723 ♪ These aren't my tree-climbing shoes ♪ 1396 01:18:47,794 --> 01:18:50,922 Hey, man, if I had known you were back, man, 1397 01:18:50,998 --> 01:18:53,023 I wouldn't have worn my wingtips. 1398 01:18:53,100 --> 01:18:54,659 Look, there's no tread left on these. 1399 01:18:54,736 --> 01:18:56,066 See? Look. 1400 01:18:56,136 --> 01:18:57,933 You can't eat those coconuts anyway, man. 1401 01:18:58,005 --> 01:18:59,199 Monkeys have been up there. 1402 01:18:59,272 --> 01:19:01,400 Eh, put that down! Put that down! 1403 01:19:01,476 --> 01:19:04,877 Don't! Don't push, man. Don't make me climb. 1404 01:19:04,946 --> 01:19:08,881 ♪ No, please don't make me climb ♪ 1405 01:19:08,949 --> 01:19:11,544 ♪ No, don't make me climb ♪ 1406 01:19:11,619 --> 01:19:15,214 ♪ These aren't my tree-climbing shoes ♪ 1407 01:19:15,289 --> 01:19:19,090 ♪ Ah, don't make me climb ♪ 1408 01:19:19,160 --> 01:19:22,721 ♪ No, don't make me climb ♪ 1409 01:19:22,797 --> 01:19:25,266 ♪ Don't make me climb ♪ 1410 01:19:25,334 --> 01:19:28,235 ♪ These aren't my tree-climbing shoes ♪ 1411 01:19:28,303 --> 01:19:29,736 Wha... 99876