Original subtitles

[Man] Christmas 2010 at the Stools. Look at that tree!

Are we ready? Should we see Santa's special present?

[Dad] Alright.

[Family gasps]

[Puppy snuffles]

Our first Christmas with Nugget!

- Look at that! - Nugget.

Keep still, Stephy.

- Here we are. - Don't want you getting burnt.

[Joyful music]

[Woman] Oh, you missed it, Ryan!

[Dad] Stephy, look at the camera! Stephanie!

Show me, Nugget. There he is.

- [Mum] Good boy! Good boy. - There he is.

♪ Tra-la-la-la-la, la-la-la ♪

You! We wanna look at you, beautiful lady.

...little one back here, I don't know where it is...

Stand like this. And then you go here.

[Barks]

Hand?

Ohh!

Ready?

[All cheer]

Go, Nan! Go, Nan! Go, Nan!

[All chatter]

Oh, Nugget!

[Snores]

[Nugget grumbles]

[Woman shouts] John, will you turn the carols down?

[John] Jodie, can you keep the noise down? I'm trying to...

Nuggie! Stephy's coming home

and bringing Seb.

[Gasps] What have you got there?

What have you d...

Oh... Oh!

Ryan! Look what Nugget's done to your dad's Santa undies!

They better not be the ones Stephy brought me from the city!

They're my favourite undies!

I wear 'em every bloody Christmas!

- Don't yell at me, John! - I wasn't yelling, Jodie.

[Jodie] I cannot hear a word you're saying.

Oh, bloody hell!

Come in here if you want a conversation.

Mum, when is Steph getting here?

You already know how I feel about my family.

Yes, they trigger you, they re-open childhood wounds.

And over Christmas, when nothing is open...

Christmas is a very difficult time, sensorily.

Exactly. But... that's not gonna happen this year.

Because of our progress.

Because I've decided to spend Christmas without them.

I'm gonna spend it with my boyfriend and his family.

OK. Well, that's different from... what we had.

I'm setting a boundary, Dr. Jay.

- Over Christmas? - Mm-hm.

- This is a big step, Steph. - Thank you.

How did your family receive this information?

Steph, we've spoken about this!

No, I know. And I do plan on telling them.

I firmly suggest

that you tell them as soon as this session is over.

Totally, and I will definitely... do that.

[Door opens]

[Man] Hey, babe, I'm just upstairs.

[Door closes]

[Soft music plays]

Look at my little baker!

Oh, my God, babe! That looks amazing!

How'd it go, babe?

Uh... good. Uh, terrible.

I've got a really hard convo ahead of me with the fam, so...

Well, you told them we're not coming, though, right?

Oh! No, of course. They know we're not, um, coming.

Dr. Jay just told me I need to

reaffirm my boundaries with them over the break.

True.

Hey, um... I'm really proud of you for doing that.

Thanks, babe. It's our first Chrissy together!

Oh, careful with all that spelt flour near that gorgeous jacket!

Josephine, I had no idea you were coming!

- It's so good to see you! - [Both chuckle]

Let me feel the fabric.

Oh, I think it's, um, some kind of blend.

It is. You can tell by the way the fabric falls. Just gorgeous!

Now, sorry for intruding, darling.

Sebastian just wanted me to sample his focaccia

ahead of the warm-up lunch tomorrow.

Oh, and thank you so much for inviting me.

I'm so excited for Christmas and the warm-up lunch -

I am so ready to meet everyone in the family!

[Chuckles]

[Josephine] Now, I just have to ask.

How is your...

...frenetic family going?

Sebastian was just telling me they're driving you up the wall.

Oh, yep, they can be a bit intense.

[Ryan] Mum, Nug won't have his December 22nd.

- Check his arsehole. - What?

What did you say?

Dogs get a white arsehole when they're sick.

No, they don't. It's inside of the ears you're meant to check.

Yeah, where'd you pull 'arsehole' from, John?

Check your own arsehole.

Oh, that's classy, Jodie.

Your parents aren't together, are they?

No. So they're separated but still living together,

which is super healthy!

Oh, Mum, you'll love this.

Steph's cousin is in one of those MLM Ponzi schemes

selling stick-on eyelashes.

[Steph] I mean, it's unconfirmed,

but all the evidence is definitely pointing that way.

[Squeals] Oh!

Absolutely beautiful, darlin'!

You look like Bette Davis.

Smoking, Mama. You look smoking. I'm serious. Smoke show.

Steph's boyfriend's gonna love it.

I absolutely love them, darl.

- You know what's amazing, guys? - What?

How still your hand is, baby.

Like, look how tiny this glue is.

- It's not that tiny. - No, Hassan's right, Shayla.

The glue's tiny!

She's a talent, your fiancée!

We've done alright for yourselves, haven't we?

Stop it, Dad! Stop it, Dad!

[Laughs] What incredibly rich material!

Oh, but they must just think the world of you!

The first doctor in the family.

Oh, well, you know what?

They don't even really understand dermatology

as, like, a medical field.

They think I'm, like, a wrinkle killer or something.

It's insane, Mum. They have no idea how hard she works.

Well, I am very proud of you.

- [Sebastian] Yeah. - We both are.

Mm-hm.

And we cannot wait to have you for Christmas.

And you'll get to meet my father, Sebastian's Grum Grum.

It's my nickname for him when I was younger.

[Laughs] It just totally stuck, didn't it?

It did! [Laughs] It did.

Oh! He's aged now, of course.

But he was really ahead of his time.

One of the first men in the army to be friends with a gay man.

[Sebastian] Mmm.

Wow! Well, I...I cannot wait to meet Grum Grum.

He sounds, um, amazing.

- [Phone buzzes] - Oh, sorry.

Oh, it's my mum. I can grab that later.

Why don't you get off your phone?

Excuse me, I'm calling our daughter!

Remember her?

Make sure you ask her to get me another pair of Santa pants!

I was gonna bloody wear 'em Christmas Day.

[Josephine] And Seb tells me your extended family

are very close by?

Yeah, my aunt and uncle live right across the road.

So it's... a bunch of fun!

[Laughs] Classic!

So I got some home brew for Johnny.

[Woman] Oh, we love that.

[Man] What's the name of the boyfriend?

[Shayla] Sebastian, Dad.

[Hassan] I feel like he's gonna be a good guy

and hopefully we can be friends.

[Dad] Don't think I've ever met a Sebastian.

[Shayla] Of course you're gonna be friends.

Whoo-hoo! Hello!

When will we see Stephy?

Now, Stephanie, I have to give you a heads-up

on some of our Christmas traditions.

Yes.

Warm-up lunch tomorrow, then cocktails on the terrace.

Oh, it's nothing too flash,

but it is quite nice at twilight. [Chuckles]

Then the next day is our Christmas Eve soirée

where we get everyone around the piano.

- [Phone buzzes] - Uh...

Um...

You know what? It's my mum again.

I might just have to grab this. She wouldn't usually call twice.

Wouldn't she?

I mean, I'll just be, um, two seconds.

[Phone continues buzzing]

You've got some flour on me.

- [Whispers] Oh, sorry. - Have you...

- Is there some on there? - Yes.

Darling, go and get... Go and get a cloth.

[Phone buzzes]

- Mum, what is it? - [Jodie] Oh, Steph.

Nugget is dead.

- What? - [Family gasps]

- Oh! - Well, not dead, but not good.

Maybe he's having a mid-life. Just needs a sports car.

[Jodie] Oh, Steph, he's not doing well.

I knew it. I knew this would happen.

Shay, do your sexy dance.

[Shayla] Oh, OK. Nug, look at me!

- Look at what Shay-Shay's got! - [Hassan] I think it's working.

- Keep going, babe! - [Shayla] Come on, Nuggy!

I told your father he wasn't doing well last week.

But nobody listened to me, as usual.

He didn't eat his treat this morning.

Normally he goes bananas for Shay!

He humps me too, Ros. He humps me too!

Mum, what is going on? What are you talking about?

Ryan, check his eyes. How are the whites of his eyes looking?

- They're... white. - [John] They're white!

[Jodie] Steph, we're taking him to the vet.

Mum, slow down. What is actually wrong with him?

[Jodie] He collapsed.

[Ryan] He didn't look good, Stephy.

- [John] He collapsed. - Collapsed how?

He was up and then he laid down suddenly!

John, just pick up Stephanie when you pick up your mother.

Mum, OK. Can you put Dad on the phone, please?

Fine. I'll do this myself.

Nobody worry about me.

Hello?

- Dad, what is going on? - Well...

Oh, and make sure you bring Stephanie straight to the vet.

Uh, your mother wants me to come

and bring you straight to the vet.

Are you serious?

He's not being himself, Steph.

And, uh, there's no point taking any chances.

Look, I'm leaving now to pick up your nan,

so, uh, I'll be over in about 70.

Oh, and make sure you bring Seb!

[John] Who's Seb?

[Jodie] The boyfriend, John!

Wake up and pay attention

to your daughter's life, for God's sake!

- [John] Fine! I'm leaving now. - Dad? Dad?

70 minutes, Steph.

Just be ready. OK, 'bye, darling.

[Line beeps]

I'm sorry, my mum just...

Apparently my dog, Nugget, is sick.

- Babe, what? - Oh, dear! That's just awful.

- I'm so sorry. - Yeah.

Um, he kinda means everything to me and it sounds bad,

so I think my dad's gonna come get me so I...

[Chuckles sadly] ...so I can say goodbye.

- [Sebastian] Really? - [Josephine] Goodness!

Like, right now?

Yeah, um...

I think I have to go pack.

Pack, darling?

Oh! No, I'll be back for the warm-up lunch, obviously.

- I'll be back. - Oh!

Oh, well, that's good, darling.

Oh, well, look, give my deepest love to your family.

- Yeah. - Mmm!

[Kookaburras laugh]

[Whines]

[Woman] Oh, good boy, Biscuit.

[Laughs] Come on, sweetie.

Jodie? Ros?

What are you and Nugget doing here?

- Hi, Tammy. Hello, Biscuit. - [Biscuit whines]

[Jodie] Is Biscuit sick?

Oh, no! [Chuckles nervously]

Just here for a quick nail clip

and a bit of a check-up before Chrissy.

11 years old, he's never been healthier!

Anyway, off to the groomer's now.

[Chuckles nervously] Alright!

Oh! Is Nugget alright?

Looks a bit off.

[Ros] He'll be alright.

- 'Bye! - 'Bye, Tammy. 'Bye, Biscuit.

There's not much happening up there, is there, Jodes?

Oh, at least she's got Biscuit.

Oh! Jodes, you're quick!

[Sebastian] All good, babe?

You want me to come see you off?

Oh! No, don't bother.

OK. Well, I hope everything goes OK.

You're gonna make it back in time, yeah?

It's just Mum told everyone you're coming and...

...I think that... I think they're all excited

I'm actually serious about someone.

Of course I'll be back in time.

I'll just go, make sure Nugget's OK, come straight back

and then we can head over to your Christmas together.

[Sebastian] OK.

Uh, you might have to meet me there.

I told Mum I'd head over early,

so I won't be here when you get back.

Oh! No worries.

That makes sense. Totally.

I 'ruv' you!

I 'ruv' you too!

[Josephine] Sebby darling? Smells delicious!

[Whispers] Should get back to Mum.

[Soft music plays]

[Car door opens]

[John] Ridiculous streets!

Haven't been updated

since motorised vehicles were invented!

- Hello, darling. - Hi, Dad!

Come on.

Hi, Nan!

Shayla? What happened to you?

Oh, I'm Steph, Nan. Your other granddaughter.

[John] OK!

- I'll give you this. - Right.

That gonna be enough stuff for the whole week?

Yep, everything's in there.

Right, so I guess we're getting vouchers, then!

I thought she looked sick! You look very pale.

Uh, I wear a lot of sunscreen, Nan. SPF.

I take care of my skin.

She's a pimple popper, Mum.

Oh, it's a disgusting habit! Never pick at your skin.

I'm actually training to be a dermatologist, Nan.

- That's a doctor. - [Nan] Oh!

[John] OK, well, where's the boyfriend?

Oh, he sends his love. He's still working.

I thought he was coming down with us.

I heard he couldn't drive.

[Nan laughs] Can't drive?

[Laughs] How old is he?

- Can we just go, please? - No, Steph...

Your mother thinks he's coming down now.

You know she doesn't like it when plans change.

OK, well, he's coming tomorrow.

And to be honest, this whole thing is a plan change, Dad.

And an overreaction. Nugget's probably fine.

[Nan] John, can we just go?

I don't trust the people around here.

- Belts on, please. - Yeah, they're on.

- [Nan slurps] - [Seatbelt continues clicking]

Just relax!

I'm relaxed, Stephanie.

- What's he do for work? - [Jodie] Seb? I don't know.

Do we have Nugget out here?

[Ros and Jodie] Yeah!

Ohh! Hello!

[Jodie] This is our little Nugget.

What a beautiful dog! You're an angel!

He's extremely smart too.

Yeah? He's got such a human face.

[Ros] He really does!

Lovely to meet you, Nugget. Why don't we get you inside?

[Ros] So you're new! What brings you to our neck of the woods?

[Vet] I followed a girl here, if you can believe it.

How's work?

Yep, pretty... full-on.

Yeah? What are they paying you now?

Like, weekly. What are you bringing in?

Dad, it's...

No, well, I just gave Hassan a pay rise.

1.6k before tax. That's weekly.

That's... Yeah, that's a lot of money, Dad.

Yeah, well, that's the kind of money you make in my business.

Now, just think what you'll make when you're the boss.

- [Nan mutters] - Sure. Yep.

- More money. - [John] Mm-hm.

Well, less, actually.

You're less liquid.

But you have flexibility - that's the payoff.

Right, so it's worth it, then.

Well, no, not really. Not all the time.

You know, you got all the responsibility.

GST and...

[Nan tuts and inhales sharply]

[Nan inhales sharply]

Nugget ate my Santa underpants that you gave me, by the way.

[Nan cackles] I won!

Yeah, g...

Oh, here we are.

- Nan, do you want my hand? - [Nan] Yes.

[Seagulls squawk]

So why don't we give you to Dad?

And I'm gonna run in, OK? I'm gonna run in.

- [John] OK, come on, Mum. - [Nan] What am I doing here?

So the big move and... what next?

Wedding bells?

Or a more non-traditional union, Ros.

None of the above, sadly. We broke up a few months ago.

- Oh, no! That's a shame. - Hmm.

Two women. Can be difficult.

Well, I mean...

Our Steph, my daughter, she's bisexual,

which is strange, because she's very uptight.

Sorry, why are we sharing this with the vet?

[Jodie and Ros yelp]

Steph! Good to see you too!

[Ros and Jodie laugh]

- [Ros] All had context, Steph. - Hey, baby. Are you OK?

You OK, bubba?

We were talking about your bisexuality

because Dr. Lander shared her own sexuality,

which is... a lesbian.

- [Jodie] That's right. - [Ros] Oh, hang on.

Did I just make an offensive assumption?

- Oh, my God. I am so sorry. - It's totally fine.

It did have context and I am a lesbian.

- [Ros] Oh, good! - [Jodie] There you go!

And good on you, darling.

Oh, thank you.

OK, can I just get an update on Nugget, please?

Since your, like, hysterical phone call

derailed my afternoon and my entire life, Mum.

There's no need to be dramatic, Steph! [Laughs]

I can give you a quick rundown.

Essentially, we ran some tests and I recommended

you all monitor him for the next 24 hours,

especially his eating.

After that, come back here, we'll redo those tests again

and see where we're at.

OK. Uh, yes, great.

I'll just write that down.

[Jodie] Oh, Steph, there's no need to write it down!

Anything else I can help you with?

Uh, no, that was great and full of information,

Dr. Lander.

Totally fine, Steph.

[Jodie] Alright.

We will get monitoring this little bub.

Come, bubba. Let's go now.

Steph's a doctor-in-training in the city.

Oh!

[Ros] We'd really love

for Steph to live down here

like my Shay does with us,

but she won't, will she, Jodes?

- Yes, we know. - Because of the boyfriend.

[Jodie] Yeah, where is he? Is he in the car?

No, he's coming tomorrow, Mum. I think we should go.

- Let's go. Let's go, Mum. - Wait.

[Jodie] Alright, we'll get out of your hair.

But we'll keep you updated about Nugget.

[Dr. Lander] Please do.

- Oh, and the boyfriend! - Oh!

- [Dr. Lander] Oh! - [Jodie laughs]

- [Chuckles] Thank you. - I'm so sorry.

[Dr. Lander laughs] You're good. Bye-bye!

[Door closes]

[Car horn toots]

[Yells] Oh, they're back from the vet!

[Nan] Oh, Hassan!

- Nan! - [Nan] There you are!

Oh, dear!

Oh, look at that outfit! You look like a boss!

[Nan laughs]

OK, Dad, we've got 21 hours and then back to the vet, right?

Hey? What's the rush, Steph? Jeez! Just got here.

What, some urbanite got a giant pimple that you need to pop?

Is that all you brought for five days?

A handbag and a tuxedo?

[John] Yeah, that's what I said.

Well, I was thinking I could wear

some of my old Christmas stuff from, like, the attic.

Oh, great, another job for me - I get to dig through the attic

for an outfit for Steph.

You're staying till Boxing Day, aren't you?

- Uh... - John, stepladder for the attic.

Uh... right. Stepladder for the attic. Stepladder, attic.

Stepladder for attic.

[Jodie] Oh, it's so cluttered in here!

Steph, you're gonna have to

take some of your things back to the city!

[Hassan] Oh! Hey, cuzzy!

So sorry! I forgot to give you a hug.

Hey, Hassan.

Shay's just stuffing the chicken.

[Steph] Oh, thank you for that update.

We're so excited to see you.

Especially Shay - for a few reasons, actually.

Um, she wants to ask you something.

You know what? I just arrived, Hassan.

Can I just go sort my things out, if that's OK?

- Yeah, that's great. - [Yells] Shay! Cuzzy's here!

This is all I could find of your old things.

I didn't have time to put fresh bed linen, so you'll have to.

That's OK. I can put it in my room.

You're not staying in your old room!

I had your father bring the caravan home for you and Seb

'cause I know how much you like your own space.

What time's he coming tomorrow?

When are we gonna do the rum balls?

- Hey! - Mum, the rum balls... Oh! Hey!

Hey, here's the wart wizard! Mwah! Where's the boyfriend?

We're actually just taking some stuff down to the caravan.

Let me help! I'll get the door.

[Jodie] Thank you, Beef.

Seb's coming tomorrow. He was always gonna come tomorrow.

I'm just here earlier than we planned now.

Oh, sorry your dog got sick.

[Ros shrieks] Look who's here!

I've just got chicken on my fingers.

I'll go wash it off. I'll come give you a hug, OK?

- Hey, Jodes, let me help. - It's alright, Beef.

You were very helpful. You got the door.

Listen, I was thinking we should take Seb

up the club tomorrow for the meat raffle.

That's a fantastic idea! He'll have his socks knocked off.

I guarantee they aren't as generous

with the meat in the city.

All about those smaller portions, aren't they?

- [Jodie] That's right. - Oh, here, Jodes.

[Jodie] Thank you, Beef.

He can't drive, can he?

- What? - The boyfriend.

How's he gonna get here if he can't drive?

That's true - if he's on the train, he's gonna need a pickup.

- [Phone chimes] - What is it, Mum?

Oh, nothing, Stephanie. Listen, I've gotta go.

I've got a million things to do.

Now, regarding boyfriend pickup,

I'd be happy to do it, Stephy.

I just need to know when, where and how.

He's, um...

Excited to see your cuzzy, Steph?

I know Shayla's been dying to catch up.

Among other things. [Chuckles]

I'm just so proud of my little girl, you know?

You know, her own 'she-E-O'.

Between you and me, I wasn't all the way across

the whole eyelash business,

but the way Shay does 'em!

Um, move, Dad! I need cuzzy hugs right now!

[Squeals] Oh, Stephy!

I missed you so much, boo!

Excuse me! Where's my hug?

- Oh, Mum! - [Squeals]

You're deprived of 'em at home, are ya, love?

I am deprived of auntie hugs, Beef!

[Beef] Room for one more? Come on! Yeah, come on!

[Shayla] Oh, my God!

[Beef] It's lovely to be together again!

[Jodie] Nugget's gonna be OK, Ryan.

Yeah. Yeah, yeah. 100%.

- [Phone chimes] - Oh.

[Chuckles] Ooh!

Uh... [Chuckles]

How are you going with the...

It's fine. It's fine, yeah.

People are very, um...

[Chuckles]

[Clears throat] Anyway.

Um, thank you for helping me.

But let's just keep that between us, OK?

I don't need Steph blowing up at me.

Yeah. No, I get that.

That's, um... It's fine, Mum. It's hard.

Steph's hard. I won't say anything to her.

[Beef] I just don't wanna let go!

It is getting... It's hot. It's a bit hot in here.

Excuse me, missy, we need some girls time!

Take a hint, Beef!

Message received. Blokes time anyway.

I'll drop in on Johnny.

Um, and, hey, Mum,

I've got a friend who doesn't really

do much over the Christmas period.

Just religious and cultural kinda differences.

I was wondering if maybe they could stay over Christmas.

Um...

...that sounds really nice.

[Ryan] Yeah.

- I'll, um... - [Nugget groans softly]

I'll organise a place mat.

OK, great! [Laughs]

[Chuckles] Alright!

You have to let me do your lashes.

Oh, that's, um, really not my thing.

I'm not into wearing them or, like, selling them onwards.

Honey... what?

Lashes are everyone's thing, babe.

Jodes has lashes, your Nan has lashes.

Yes, even Ryan tried lashes. You know what he's like - quirky.

He doesn't care what's normal.

Let's get them done before dinner, yeah?

- [Gasps] Before boyfie arrives! - [Ros squeaks]

- [Steph chuckles] - [Ros] Hooray!

Babe, I am that excited to meet Sebastian.

Now, does he like 'Sebastian' or does he like 'Seb'

or does he like something altogether, like, different?

How in the world has he managed to avoid us this long?

[Shayla] I'm just gonna whip those off you right now.

- Thanks, I... - No.

You want eyebrows done as well?

I've done my wax and tint certificate.

I've got an eyebrow person in Sydney, so all good.

- Really? - [Shayla] Do you?

Are they legit, babe? 'Cause my stuff's legit.

I get all my gear from this amazing company.

They're more like a family.

This is just starting to sting a little bit.

[Shayla] What?! Lash virgin things!

- OK. - Yeah, we're ready. OK.

[Ros] Open-up time, darl.

You look that hot.

Seriously, you look so much more put-together now.

- Yeah... - Don't touch them, girlfriend!

- You have to let them dry out. - Do not touch. Yeah.

How long do they, um... they last?

Oh, don't stress, babe. Mine last for, like, up to six weeks.

Longer with infills. It's a lot longer than Bianca's, isn't it?

That's Beauty by Bianca.

A lot of her old clients now get lashes by Shayla.

It's because of my people skills.

I've got a client-first attitude

and I'm not afraid to get deep.

[Chuckles] Well, thank you.

- I'd better go. - So, um, Stephy...

I've been meaning to talk to you about something.

Um, it's not ideal timing

with everything that's going on with Nugget,

but I just, um...

Something more to do with what's going on with me.

I wanted to ask you something...

I just remembered that I have to call Seb

to give him directions how to get here.

- So I'm gonna go... - Oh, talk to Seb.

We don't want him... Don't want him getting lost.

[Shayla] Yeah, no.

- You look gorge! - Yes, thank you.

Different person.

- So close. - Next time, darling. Next time.

[Phone line rings]

[Seb] Hey, babe.

Yep, so MLM recruitment pretty much confirmed.

Oh, and Nugget is fine, as expected.

Yeah, I told you!

Just waiting on confirmation from the vet tomorrow

and then I can make my escape to yours.

Yeah, awesome. That's perfect, babe.

Mum's putting on negronis at 12:00.

Oh, yeah, that should totally, um, work.

The vet's close to the station.

It'll take me two hours to get there.

And then I was thinking of telling everyone

that you've had a family emergency with Grum Grum

and you need me there for moral support.

But they know you're not staying, right?

No, that's in case they lay on the guilt, as usual.

That's so funny!

Of course my cousin gets a mullet in Budapest.

Oh, classic!

[Chuckles] That is funny.

Alright, I gotta go, babe.

No, I won't keep you, babe.

I'll see you tomorrow, then. I love you.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll talk to you soon.

Grum Grum, you old dog!

[Line beeps]

[Jodie] Where's John gone off to? Is he back in the shed?

Nice to see Nan-Nan, hey? Hey?

Hey, little bro.

Hey, Stephy.

It's nice to have you home.

Yeah, it's great to be home.

Such a relaxing and restorative time.

Yeah, OK, everyone's a little stressed, for sure.

But your, um... Hey, your lashes look good.

Oh, yeah. You reckon they're the new me?

Yeah! Yeah, for real, yeah.

You and Shay look like twins. [Laughs]

Oh, how's he going?

- How's bubba? - He's good.

He looks better since you got here.

Isn't that right, Nuggy?

Dig in, everyone!

John, did you hear that?

Get out of the shed!

- Come and join us! - [John] Yes, I heard, Jodie.

- I'm here. - [Ros] Look at this!

Oh, a moment in time!

It's important to capture things like this!

[Jodie] Our babies!

- Nuggy? - Nuggy!

[Beef] Yeah, that's beautiful. OK, now everyone in.

No, go on, everyone get in. Johnny, in you go.

- Come on! - Turn around, look at Beef, Mum.

[Beef] Just sit back and... Yeah, that's it.

- Everyone get in. - Come in here with me!

Everyone in? Everyone in. That's lovely.

And say "Christmas"!

[All] Christmas!

- Beautiful! - We need one with you.

No, no. Come on, everyone. Let's eat. Let's eat. Chook?

- [Crickets chirp] - [Sniffles]

[Groans]

[Sniffles]

[Camera clicks]

[Phone beeps]

[Phone chimes]

[Bed creaks]

[Birds squawk and warble]

[Scratching at door]

[Nugget barks]

- Hey, little Nug! - [Nugget sneezes]

Look at your little outfit!

- See, I knew you were fine! - [Nugget whines]

You're feeling so much better, aren't you?

Why don't we go straight to the vet

so everyone can relax

and Stephy can have lunch with a war hero?

What do you think, bubba? Should we go?

Should we go, bubba? Let's go, baby.

Come, bubba! Let's get your little collar on.

OK, team, let's get right to the vet bright and early.

Into the cars we go.

- Holy hell! - [Plate clatters]

Oh, my God, no!

- What? What's wrong? - [Nan] Who is that?

It's me, Nan. It's Steph.

Oh, darling, we need to get that sorted.

[Ryan] Oh, my God, Steph, that is... [Laughs]

What are you talking about?

Oh, darling, you look horrible!

Well, thanks, Mum, it's just my favourite suit.

Stephy, you've got a, um...

You've got a... pustulous eye, Steph.

There's no other way to say it.

I'll get you something to fix that.

- [Steph] What? - Now, heat or cold?

- [Jodie] Here, here, here... - [Steph] Oh, my God, no...

[Shayla] OK, OK, this has never happened before!

This has never happened before!

Of course it hasn't. It's not your fault, darling.

[Hassan] Steph must have ultra-sensitive eyeballs.

[Ros] Yeah!

Steph, I should have asked if you had a condition

that made one eye fill with pus.

That's OK. I'll just get the ice to bring it down.

You're gonna need an entire military operation

to bring that thing down.

Beef! [Stifles laughter]

I hope it settles before the boyfriend gets here.

What time's he coming again, Steph?

Um... just later, Mum. He usually works up until Christmas.

[Ros] What does he do again?

He's, a, um... mid-century upcycler.

Like a furniture curator.

- [John] Furniture what? - [Doorbell rings]

Oh, my God, he's here early to surprise you!

- [Women squeal] - [Hassan] Far out!

That is so something I would do!

How do I look? How do I look?

[All chatter excitedly]

Let's go.

[All chatter excitedly]

[Beef] Wait for me, hon!

Hey, Steph, do you want an eye patch?

What? Why do you have an eye patch?

From the pirate escape room.

[Chuckles] I've been working there for, like, eight months.

It's in the family group chat.

[Jodie] Here we go.

- [Family] Oh! - [Shayla shrieks excitedly]

- He's very young. - Think it's a cougar situation?

It's lovely to meet you, Seb.

What?

Oh! No, Mum, that's Leon.

- Hey! Thanks for coming. - [Jodie] Oh!

I brought this as a gift for you all.

I googled 'Australian Christmas' and that was

one of the only unproblematic things I could find.

Yeah, that...

Well, OK, cool! We can inflate that together.

That'll be sick.

OK. It's good to see you!

[Ros] Oh!

Of course, this is your friend! Or person that you mentioned.

But he's a boy.

Sorry, Leon.

We were expecting Steph's boyfriend to arrive,

but you're not him, are you?

No, because he's not here.

Whoa, that... eye looks super painful.

Everyone, this is Leon,

Ryan's special friend from the internet.

- Ohh! - [John] G'day, Leon.

- Hi, Leon. - How you goin', mate?

- Pleased to meet you, mate. - Hi!

- Leon. - Oh! Sorry.

That eye is scary as.

It's like something out of a horror movie.

Hey, mate, mate, I hear you on that.

Steph, your bung eye's scaring our guest!

Leon, let's get your bag through to the spare room

and get you some Christmas crumpets.

Don't we need to go to the vet?

There's no hurry, Steph. We need to get Leon comfortable.

Ryan, get your sister that eye patch.

Ryan, darling. I'm sure he'll come soon, Steph.

[All chatter]

Yeah, great. This is great.

This is perfect.

[Sniffles]

[Leon] Thank you, guys, for having me.

Um, my family doesn't celebrate Christmas, so I was, like,

it would be cool to see, like, a classic... white one.

- Mmm. - Ah!

- Huh! - [Phone chimes]

OK, we should go to the vet right now.

Ah, that looks better!

Don't be rude to our guest, Steph.

We're not in a rush.

Well, actually, we are in a rush

to find out if our dog, Nugget, is sick or not.

You called me 'cause you were concerned.

If you're no longer concerned,

let's just confirm he's OK, as I expected.

Alright, Steph, let's go, then.

Is that what you're wearing?

To the vet?

You don't wanna put on something a little bit less boxy?

[Ros giggles]

OK, well, I'll be in the car.

[Whines]

Dad, there's no way this is the fastest route.

You can turn right here.

I don't need to be told the route, Stephy.

- It's from Maps. - But I will tell you something.

Bet you didn't bring down my new Santa jocks, did you?

What are you talking about, Dad?

Nugget ate through the crotch of Dad's Santa underpants,

the ones you got him for Christmas.

Yeah, and I really like them!

[Hassan] So the career counsellor said that being a vet

was one of my top five potential careers.

Yeah, 'cause I love cats, little baby kittens.

You love baby animals.

Yeah, but when I saw Nugget, he really, um, took my breath away.

[All chuckle]

[Shayla] Also, Dr. Lander,

it might not look like it,

but the family is really going through it.

Yeah, really losing our minds over the little one, you know?

[Whispers] Barely holding it together.

Did you ask her to bring another pair?

- I thought I told her. - You didn't.

How am I gonna find the exact same ones?

- I don't know where I got them! - You got them from the city!

What are you talking about, Dad?

I'm racking my brains about these undies!

- What'd they look like? - I remember they were hilarious.

Comedic with the Santa placement.

[Both laugh]

You can say what you want about the city...

Yeah, I will, Beef. I will say I don't like it.

You get a lot variety. A lot of variety, John.

So, Steph, let's start a list.

A few years ago, you bought me a body wash.

Love to get that again!

[Chuckles] I'd like some of that too!

Steph, write that down. 'Body wash from the city'.

Anyone's allowed to go into the city! You're allowed to go!

And, Dad, can you go any faster?

- Let's not scare Nugget. - I'm being a cautious driver.

Steph, don't annoy your father while he's driving.

- Now he's going even slower. - That's right. I am.

[Steph] You are going so slow right now!

[All bicker at once]

Also, Dr. Lander, you're really pretty, by the way.

- Oh! - Hassan, don't you reckon?

Absolutely!

But no one's as pretty as my fiancée.

- [Door bell chimes] - That's just facts, sorry.

- Hassan! - [Dr. Lander laughs]

[Steph] OK, Nuggy, let's go. OK, baby.

[Pirate voice] Oh! Ahoy there, matey!

Well, you've got an eye patch on.

I do. I have, uh, an eye patch.

- Yeah. - Yeah.

There's precious Nugget!

Have you been a good boy?

Such a good boy! Should we get him straight in?

Yeah!

[Nugget whines]

The whole family's here!

Yep, well, best to get the information all at once.

OK. Well, let's get Nugget in the room.

And maybe we'll just have

one representative of Nugget's family in the room with me.

- Do you wanna go? - [Jodie] Maybe I...

I mean, I can go. I'm the trainee doctor.

- Oh, well, pimple doctor. - [Dr. Lander] Oh!

[Nugget whines]

- [Laughs] - [Jodie] Shut up, John!

We'll wait out here. Sorry about him.

- [Dr. Lander] Oh, no! - Take him anywhere once.

[Dr. Lander] Alright, let's go, Nugget!

[Nugget whines]

It's, uh, not conjunctivitis, by the way.

As a doctor, my official diagnosis is

I'm allergic to lash glue.

Well, as a doctor of veterinary medicine,

I just thought you were going for a bold look.

What can I say? The eye patch gives me courage.

Plus, Nugget loves it, don't you, bubba?

[Dr. Lander] I'm so happy to hear his energy's back up.

But I do wanna take those bloods again.

- Yeah, of course. Of course. - Yeah.

Your family's really great, by the way! [Laughs]

Oh!

Yeah, they're definitely... something.

OK, Nuggy.

- [Nugget whines] - Shh, shh.

[Steph] Nuggy, it's OK.

So has the boyfriend arrived yet?

Uh, no, he's not coming.

He was never going to come.

I was always gonna do Christmas with his family.

And I'm hoping once this goes well, I can just...

...head off.

[Dr. Lander] OK.

Um, I'm actually supposed to be there already.

So I'm already letting him down by being here.

And then I have to tell my family I'm leaving,

and then I'll be letting them down,

so I'm just kinda trying to do both.

Where do you wanna be?

Sorry?

I just... I mean, like, where would you like to be?

I know I'd definitely feel weird

leaving my sick dog behind, but...

- [Nugget whines] - I'm sorry.

I...I just mean, like, it's a hard place for you to be in.

Hard position.

Terrible timing.

You know? Uh...

Bad timing.

Yeah, no, it's been... It's been tough.

Yeah.

[Pirate voice] Oh, I'm sure it ain't anything

old Captain Hook can't handle!

Uh...

Was that just a little voice there?

Yeah, I mean, I do voices.

Mainly to the animals.

Oh, and they often, um... survive?

The animals love it, actually. It heals them.

Oh, no, I believe it.

I believe it!

I believe it.

[Steph chuckles]

- We are actually all done here. - Oh!

I'll get the results out to you.

Great! Yeah, we'll wait outside.

- Yeah. - You were great, bubba!

- You were amazing! - Baby, you were perfect!

[Grumbles]

[Jodie] You're a good boy, Nuggy. You are!

[Hassan] That's what's crazy, though.

So, scientifically, like, the body has to shed the weight

before it puts back on the muscle.

[Jodie] Another piece! Oh!

He just ate it!

The jerky from before, he just ate it!

Come on, bubba. [Chuckles]

Uh, I'm so sorry, everyone,

but the white blood cell count is actually

significantly dropped since yesterday.

[Shayla] What? What's that mean?

[Dr. Lander] The level he's at, it's not critical.

But if it continues to drop at the same rate...

...we would start to see quite a drastic loss of mobility.

[Gasps] Oh, my God!

[Nugget pants and grumbles]

Uh, so what's the solution?

- John! - I just...

I want to know solutions.

I would recommend a gastrointestinal endoscopy.

Oh, so we can see if there are any growths or tumours.

Yeah, or if it's cancer that's causing the white cells to drop.

Done. Let's do that.

[Dr. Lander] The procedure involves

feeding a small camera into Nugget

which will pass back out of him eventually

and once we retrieve it,

we would start to see the images it produces of his insides.

[Jodie] Oh, my baby!

[John] Uh, well, let's do that now

instead of standing around here wasting time.

The other option is a blood transfusion.

That will give Nugget a little boost

while he continues to fight whatever's hurting him.

Done! Let's do both. Let's get this thing from all angles.

- Yep. - Yep.

I...I do have to say that

both the endoscopy procedure and the white blood transfusion

together are both extremely expensive.

Not a problem.

Let's do it. We'll do it.

OK.

We just need a willing dog donor.

- [John] What? - [Hassan] Excuse me?

[Clears throat] A doggie donor?

Yeah, just like humans, we have dogs

who can afford to donate their healthy blood.

I know of a healthy pooch we can ask.

Isn't that right, Jodes?

- [Jodie] Oh, uh... - [Shayla] Who? Mama, who?

Mama, who is it?

- Mama, I don't get it. - Tammy, darling.

- My phone's in the car. - Tammy? Oh, OK.

[Emotional piano music]

[Phone line rings]

- [Phone buzzes] - [Guests chatter and laugh]

Babe, we're in the middle of celebrity head!

Where are you?

Seb, I'm so sorry.

Um, yep, things with Nugget are, um...

[Guests laugh over phone]

I'm not gonna make it today.

And, yeah, I don't know about... about Christmas either.

- What? - We don't, um...

Sorry, we just don't know what it is.

And I just... Yeah, I just have to be here.

Yeah.

OK, um...

That's a massive bummer.

It is a bummer, Seb.

- He's my family dog, I... - No, I get it, I get it.

It's just...

I'm recalibrating.

You know, I guess, like, for me,

I was just really looking forward to doing family time

with you.

I know. I know, I'm so sorry.

I mean, you could, um...

Yeah, you could come here if you wanted.

- Um... - No...

It's not a massive vibe or anything,

but if you wanted to be, um...

[Josephine] Oh!

[Laughs] That's a fantastic one!

I really can't do that, Steph.

Like, I'd have to tell everyone you're not coming

and then turn around and be, like,

"Oh, sorry. Peace, guys. I'm gonna head out too."

Uh, no.

That's t... totally fair. I get that.

Um, yeah, well, just...

Yeah, send everyone my love, then.

Sounds really fun.

Yeah, for sure, babe.

We'll speak soon.

- Bye! - [Line beeps]

[Emotional piano music continues]

Sorry, it's just a lot of stress to put us both through.

It will only take five minutes of Biscuit's time.

- The transfusion? - Yeah.

- I'm not sure about that. - It's totally up to you.

And Biscuit.

- Totally. - [Shayla] Up to you, yeah.

And also, how would you like

free lashes and infills for a year?

Mink?

Mink!

- Oh! - Mink.

Good boy, Biscuit!

- Good on you, Tammy. - [John] Onya, Tammy.

Good boy.

Oh, dear. Popeye.

[Shayla chuckles]

[Tammy] Yeah, good boy!

[Door squeaks]

[Hopeful music]

[Dr. Lander] All done. He was perfect.

[Family chatters excitedly]

Who's a good boy?

[Shayla] Oh, you got a camera up you, Nugget?

[Jodie] Who's a good boy?

- [All chatter excitedly] - [Jodie] Hello!

[John] Good onya, mate!

Thank you. Thank you so much!

Come on, Nugget. Let's get into the car, love.

[Ros] He looks real good, John.

- Oh! [Chuckles] - [John] I know.

[Jodie] OK.

- Thank you. - Oh, thank you!

Oh. Thank you.

Thank you for today.

- [Door bell rings] - Any time.

The office is closed from tomorrow,

so here is my number

if you need to call in case...

What, he gets worse?

In case you need to check in,

Captain.

Wow, it's, um, brave to continue with the pirate stuff.

- Yeah, I think I regret it. - [Steph chuckles]

Well, I appreciate it.

- I know this one. - Do you know which it is?

- Podiatrist. - That's right!

I know about feet.

[Nan] Good boys.

Ryan, love, we're back!

[Ryan] Oh, yeah! How was it? How'd it go?

[Jodie] Well, we're hopeful. We're very hopeful.

- Now, everyone, remember. - [Door closes]

We stay with Nugget whenever he goes outside.

We guard every shit with our lives.

- Yes. - Can do.

In the meantime, I want

everyone's help in the kitchen, please.

We're not gonna let Nugget's cancer ruin Christmas!

[Ryan] His what? His cancer?

- Mum, we don't know that. - Is there a treatment plan?

I don't know. I don't know. It's expensive.

It doesn't matter. We will make it work.

Alright?

Excuse me. Sorry.

Auntie and Uncle J, Shay and I had a talk

and we would love to share

some of our personal kitty to... to help.

[John] No. No, Hassan, Shay. Thank you. That's not necessary.

[Jodie] That's your wedding fund!

Aren't you guys planning a destination wedding?

Please, please. We've already decided.

OK? So no offence.

Don't wanna talk about it any further. It's done.

And you know we'll be putting in. It goes without saying.

Just money, at the end of the day.

Spend it on bullcrap anyway!

[Shayla] Mum, Mum...

Yeah, you know what? I'd love to throw a thou to help out.

- Hang on, a thou? - [Jodie] Oh, my God!

Darling Leon, we are not taking money from you!

You know what? It's chill.

Last year, Ryan helped me set up my e-store business

and it's really launched my art into a global audience.

So you know what, if you're not gonna take it from me,

take it from Ryan,

'cause I've just transferred him his e-store commission.

- [Phone chimes] - Uh...

Oh, yeah! It's true.

- What? - [Ryan] That just landed!

[All talk at once]

Money, Mum. On the computer.

I cannot believe the generosity of this family.

And from our guests!

[Awkward silence]

[John] Uh, well, I've got things to do.

Yeah, me too. I also do.

[Ros] Oh! Um, good result, isn't it?

[Shayla] Actually, I'm gonna go and help Jodes.

[All chatter at once]

[Beef] Where's old Johnny running off to?

[Hassan] I think he's gone to the shed, Pops.

[Beef] Oh! Oh.

Yes, he's tinkering away on

something terribly important, apparently.

Oh, great. Maybe I can help.

[Christmas carols play softly on TV]

[Grumbles]

[Jodie chops food rapidly]

What is Stephy even doing here?

[Shayla] I'm freaking out about Steph, Mama Bear!

You think I can still ask her now that her eye's bung?

What if she's mad and doesn't wanna be part of it

because of her bunged-up eye?

[Ros] Come on, now. Stephy loves you.

You just gotta say to her, "Listen, girlie.

"You're family and I love you.

"I know you're a busy chicky,

"but this is a beautiful opportunity

"for us to reconnect."

Oh, wow, Mama Bear. That was so good.

I need you to write that down for me on something

so I can just say that.

OK. I'll put it on a sticky note.

- Thank you. Thank you, Mama. - [Ryan] It's gonna be cold.

[Nugget barks]

Hi, baby! [Chuckles] Look who's bucked up!

Hi, bubba! You wanna come play with Stephy?

You like your transfusion, don't you?

You are a happy one, aren't you?

You're a bubba! Ohh!

See? You're fine, baby!

- [Growls playfully] - Look at you!

Oh, you're fine!

- [Nugget growls playfully] - You're fine.

And no messages. That is great.

[Man on radio] That has got to be the funniest...

No, you can't... You can't see it. It's not ready yet.

Oh, no worries. I just wanted a little chinwag.

Been a while since we caught up.

I'll just... Why don't I just come in...

No! No, we can talk through the gap.

- Absolutely. - Yeah.

There you go.

Great, ta.

I just wanted to say, well,

you know, if you're ever around this summer,

it'd be good to go to the driving range.

That'd be nice.

Yeah, yeah. Well, maybe. Uh...

If I can get time off work.

I'm not retired yet, Angus.

No, no, of course.

But, you know, you take time off for things that matter.

Be good to get some blokes time in.

- Mm. - Life's short and all.

[John] Hm.

[John continues sanding]

Well, I think that food might nearly be ready, Johnny.

Yeah, well, um...

- I'll come in when it is ready. - You got it.

Yeah. [Continues sanding]

- I'll just wait for ya. - [John stops sanding]

[Nan] Oh, this is lovely. Christmas decorations...

[Ros] Yeah, Mum. We're just gonna sit down and eat now.

Yes, I'd like that.

Wow, Auntie, that spread looks amazing!

Thank you, Hassan.

Be nice to know how many I'm cooking for again.

- Dare I ask about Seb? - Mum, just drop it.

[Festive music plays]

[Jodie] It's a simple question, Steph.

Is Seb coming today or not?

Seb's finally coming, is he? Ohh! Thank God!

We can get Seb to curate the dining room table. [Chuckles]

Steph, do you know what time he's coming, though,

because it'd be good to top up your eyelashes...

Got some bonding games I want to play with him.

I just don't want him to be...

OK, you know what? He's not coming, OK?

He's just doing his own thing.

Wait, what?

- What? - Oh, Steph.

Steph, you alright?

Yeah, I don't know, Ryan.

Well, Stephy, I know how you say you're bisexual,

but now it looks like you're by yourself.

- Oh, Dad! - [Hassan laughs]

Yeah, that's really cool and funny, Dad, thanks.

Oh, Stephy, Steph,

do you want to just do some girls time

in the caravan like old times?

I can make Hassan go up to the servo, get some Jaffas...

I have other people I can talk to about this, but thank you.

- Oh, really, like who? - [John laughs]

- No, I didn't... - No, you know what?

I'm actually gonna have dinner by myself in the caravan.

- Steph! - Oh, Steph!

- I didn't mean that as a joke. - No, I...

No, it's OK, you just don't get it.

- I... - Steph, please!

I know you have friends, Steph.

- Have some chicken. - I don't want chicken, Mum.

[Thumps] Can you leave me alone for one second?

- Oh, my... - Have dinner with the family.

- Steph, Steph! - Have some chicken! Have some...

- [John] Steph! Oh! - Steph!

[Grunts softly]

[Sniffles]

- [Breathes deeply] - [Phone line rings]

- [Phone rings] - [Festive music plays]

Steph, are you OK?

Not really.

What is it? Where are you?

[Tearfully] I'm in my parents' caravan.

I think Seb is really mad at me.

What?

I told him that I couldn't come to Christmas

'cause Nugget is sick,

and he was so upset, and I just feel so guilty.

And now I'm here with my parents and they are mad at me as well,

and I just...

...just trying to make everyone happy...

Steph, I'm gonna be honest with you.

You've called me at one of the most full-on times of the year.

I only keep my phone on in case any of my clients

try to kill themselves.

But you're in a caravan crying

because people are mad at you.

No, I-I-I do hear that.

Steph, we've been talking about this all year.

This Christmas, I'm going to need you to give yourself

the gift of honesty.

I want you to be honest with yourself

and the people around you.

OK, but what if they just...

People who love you

will always make space for who you are.

Now, my truth

is that I have to go and have my private life,

and I'm still going to invoice you for this.

[Line beeps]

[Sniffles]

[Sniffles]

[Scoffs lightly]

[Inhales deeply]

[Message whooshes]

[Gentle music]

[Keypad beeps]

[Messages whoosh]

[Sniffles and chuckles]

- [Bright music] - [Birds sing]

[Yawns]

[Nugget whines]

Hey, baby!

Are you feeling OK?

You like Stephy's outfit?

You OK, bubba?

[Nugget whines softly]

You OK, baby?

You OK, little man?

Why don't we get you inside, OK?

Oh, bubba. Come on.

- [Ryan] OK, Mum, Mum... - [Jodie] I can't believe it!

I mean, it's just my luck.

[Ros] It's OK, Jodes. Just hang on a tick, alright?

OK, Mum, look, there's lots of places it can be.

[Jodie] That's exactly the point, Ryan!

Yelling isn't gonna help, is it?

- Don't yell at me, John. - Oh!

OK, stop, guys, what is going on?

[Jodie] It's gone. Gone.

Your mother thinks she's lost Nugget's camera.

I don't think anything, John! I don't have it!

OK, maybe it hasn't passed yet. It's still early.

No, it's midday, Steph.

He's already done two shits today

and it's not in either of them!

I went through both of them.

John went through both of them!

I also did a once-over.

OK, well, why didn't you wake me up?

To get your whole eyeball on it?

[Laughs] Sorry, that was just super quick.

This doesn't make any sense. Where else could it be, Mum?

- [Cries] - [Ryan] Mum!

- [Ros] Oh, Jode! - [John] Jodie. Jode, calm down.

- Don't cry. - [Ryan] Mum, Mum, it's OK.

We can keep looking.

I took Nugget down the beach last night.

He seemed so energetic.

He must have done a sneaky one while we were down there

and I didn't see it!

I feel so stupid I could just kick myself!

- No, Mum, it's OK. - [Shayla] It's OK.

Oh. Ooh.

- Jo... - I'm going.

You're going where?

I'm gonna call Dr. Lander.

- Here, Steph, take my phone. - No, Mum...

Call the vet and just tell 'em what's happened.

OK, Mum, what good is that gonna do?

[Screams] Just do it, Steph!

I am so sick of doing everything myself.

- No, J-Jodie. - I just...

Jodie. Jodie!

I'd say she's going to the beach.

Yeah, let's go, Beef. OK, kids.

- Dad, are we... - No, Mum...

Uh, Steph, just do what your mother asks.

- [John] OK, let's go. - [Shayla] Go that way, babe.

- Who are you? - [Phone chimes]

Dirty thief! Give that to me!

No, no, no, Nan, it's me.

- It's me. - Thief!

- It's OK. - Pirate!

Nan, it's me, Steph, the pimple popper.

- Oh, you look terrible. - It's fine.

- Is that... Is that... - Is that your mother's...

No, it's not, it's nothing.

- [Huffs] - That's not mine.

D-Dad, it's not... I...

Get that filth off your phone. It's nearly Christmas.

Nan, it... Jesus Christ!

Exactly! Jesus Christ!

We're celebrating him

with Christmas crackers, as it should be.

[Laid-back music]

[All chatter at once]

So fan out and be thorough.

[All chatter at once]

[Metal detector beeps and squeals erratically]

- Mum, did he go on the grass? - [Chatter continues]

[Jodie] Love, look everywhere.

Hassan reckons we've got to look down low...

[Jodie] John, clearly, that thing's not working.

[Metal detector ticks]

[Shayla] We've got to think like a dog,

like a dog that's going for a poo that needs...

[Chatter continues]

[Shayla] Yeah, yeah, I...

[Jodie] What have you got there, Leon?

See, Leon's being thorough.

- [Chatter continues] - [John] I'm looking, Jodie.

You're not gonna believe the story that I have for you.

[Dr. Lander] OK.

How do I put this?

Uh, would you rather

find a photo of a man's, um, piece

on your mum's phone

that belonged to your dad

or a stranger?

What?

My mum downloaded a dating app

even though she's living with my dad,

even though they're separated.

Oh, and my dad found the picture and it wasn't his, so...

- [Chuckles] - Whoa.

How are you handling it all?

I'm actually, um... yeah, I'm actually not handling it.

I can't even, nuh, think about it anymore.

Alright, why don't we just focus on this incredible task

of sifting through dog crap at the beach?

Oh, you definitely didn't need to help with this, by the way.

I'm just doing my job.

I mean, I'm not a vet, but I'm sure this is, like,

above and beyond.

Oh, it definitely is.

It's just nice to be around family this time of the year.

I mean, even a, uh, pervert family?

Especially a pervert family.

[Steph laughs]

[Dr. Lander laughs]

So do you not usually, like, go home over Christmas?

Uh, it's complicated.

We're all pretty scattered, so there's no base to go home to.

Right.

Plus I really like it here.

It's the first place I feel like I've been able to...

...settle in for a while, despite my break-up.

Well, I'm, um, sorry about the break-up.

It's alright.

Sometimes things just run their course, you know?

We both had, uh...

We had different needs.

- Yeah, I get that. - [Chuckles]

Plus no eye patch, so huge red flag.

- Huh. - Oh, there's one!

Uh, OK, do you want to

- You want to... - No, I got it.

Right in with the... with the gloves.

That's... that's good.

So did you...

...talk to the boyfriend?

Uh, no, he's, uh, kind of, uh...

He's not replying to me.

[Laughs]

That sounds, uh, bad, doesn't it?

Yeah, a little bit.

I don't know the whole situation, though.

Yeah.

But...

...sounds like you deserve better.

- This one's empty, by the way. - Um...

- Well, empty of camera. - Great.

It's gonna be in the next one.

- How tiny is this camera? - I can feel it.

- OK, I assume this big. - Oh, there's another pile.

- OK, well you have to... - Move out of my... It's mine.

Use this this time!

You get it as high as you possibly can,

hot as you possibly can.

When you get that smoke going, that's the flavour.

That's the flavour of... burnt?

[Shayla] Oh, there she is. Stephy.

I just can't believe it.

It's OK, Jodes. It'll turn up.

No, it won't.

I looked through every shit ever shat today.

Flip them, Johnny. No, they're not ready yet.

- They are. They're charred. - [John] No.

Oh. It's nice of you to show up for dinner.

What's with the tone, Mum?

[Barbecue sizzles]

I'm just saying, it might be nice of you to do

what you say you're gonna do so I'm not let down.

Oh, I've let you down, have I?

Why, 'cause Seb's not here

and I haven't been making balls of rum?

You have no idea what I sacrificed to be here.

What's that supposed to mean, Stephanie?

What exactly have you sacrificed?

Well, if I'm honest,

I told Seb I'd do Christmas with his family this year.

What?

I'm not even supposed to be here,

and now I've let him down and his whole family.

- [Ros and Shayla] What? - [Beef] What? I missed that.

- The loud sizzling. - Hold the tongs.

Well, that's just great, Stephanie.

What about your own family?

Have you considered how that might make us feel?

I do nothing but consider your thoughts and feelings

and reactions to everything.

- John, we need crackers. - Yeah, not now, Mum.

Well, that's funny, Steph,

'cause I feel like I get zero appreciation.

- [Barbecue sizzles] - Um, I'll be back.

Zero appreciation for hosting Christmas.

Darl, we all appreciate you hosting Chrissy.

Zero appreciation for loving and cherishing two gay kids.

- What? - Wait, stop.

That's right, Stephanie, he's gay.

Or are you too caught up in your own drama to even notice?

- Wait, Ryan, I... - It's alright, Ryan, love.

- We're being honest, apparently. - OK, yeah.

I'm... I'm not gay.

[Nan] Crackers, John!

We always do Christmas crackers on Christmas Eve.

- Yes, just give me a sec, Mum. - [Shayla] He's not gay.

[Jodie] But, Ryan, I thought you and Leon...

Oh! Oh, we're platonic as, Mrs Stool.

But to be fair, I am pansexual.

- He's a what now? - [Nan] Crackers!

Yeah, yeah, I'm getting the crackers, Mum!

You said a friend from the internet.

- Just a friend. - [Nan] What are you doing?

Uh, actually, I have something I'd like to say.

- Yes, honey, go. - You got this, babe.

S-Steph, I...

I don't know if it's on purpose, but I've been a little bit hurt

because I don't know if you've noticed,

but I've been trying really hard to connect with you.

Um, and I feel like you've been maybe avoiding me...

[Leon] I'm not fully sure whether this is, like, done.

And I'm just...

Basically it's just

'cause I wanted to actually ask you...

- Shayla, let's not do this now. - Stephy, let her speak.

I wanted a piece of your time because I wanted to ask you...

OK, Shayla, I have been avoiding you.

'Cause I swear to God,

if you ask me to join your MLM lash gel pyramid scheme

so you can give people eye infections in your garage,

I'm gonna lose it!

Oh, Stephy, that's not right.

What are you talking about?

I was gonna ask you to be my bridesmaid.

Oh, no, Steph.

- Crackers, Mum, crackers. - What are those, John?

- [Nan] I don't want crackers! - [Shayla] Yeah, I...

I was gonna ask you to be a bridesmaid along with Mama.

I'm the maid of honour and the mother of the bride.

[Ryan] OK. Come on, Nan. Why don't we...

[Nan] There's always something. No, you come and help me, dear.

I-I'm so sorry.

I-I just thought you were...

Yes, well, you thought wrong, didn't you?

Nicely done, Steph.

I don't even know what MLM is.

- [Beef] It's OK, Shay. - Shay...

She's got some walls up. She gets that from her father.

- What the hell does that mean? - John, take a cracker.

I don't want a cracker, Mum!

I've been out by the shed

trying to talk to you and you've not let me in.

Which is ironic, given a shed's often where men like us talk.

Oh, Beef, not everyone's close like us, and that's OK.

It's just a different way of doing things.

Oh, yes, Ros, we know, you and Shay are best friends

and you and Beef are best friends,

my daughter hates me and doesn't want to come home for Christmas.

Mum, I don't hate you...

And I'm separated from my husband, and you know what?

Why even come over here for Christmas

if you just want to rub that in our faces?

OK, I'm not dealing with this.

You could have come to St. Vincent's, John.

- Nuggy, take a cracker. - Not a word from you.

When I passed those kidney stones two months ago.

Beef, I said not to bring that up!

What the hell's that got to do with anything?

As a bloke, you could have shown a bit more care!

You try passing a chickpea through your urethra.

- [Leon] Oh! - [John] Oh!

[Hassan] Whoa, hectic image.

It was a chickpea-sized stone, John,

and not a word from ya.

How many times do I have to say it, Beef?

Some of us have to work!

Beef, chickpea is a bit of a stretch.

[Shrieks] It was a chickpea, Ros!

- It was a chickpea! - [Nugget barks]

- Yeah, I... - [Ryan] Hey, can we settle down?

- We're riling up Nugget. - [Nan] Or maybe...

...that's because Steph has been showing him cocks.

- What? - Nan, no.

- That's enough, Mum. - [Hassan] Cocks?

- Nan, are you sure? - [Confidently] Cocks.

- [Shayla] Nan! - [Beef] That's not her style.

[Ros] She likes them too, Beef. She's bisexual.

[Hassan] Steph's been looking at pictures of cocks?

No, no, I haven't, and I wasn't looking at pictures...

I saw a photo of that on Mum's phone.

Actually, Dad, maybe you'd like to talk about this.

No. [Stammers] Uh, no.

Jodie has a penis on her phone?

Face or cropped?

Oh, my God. Mum, what are you doing?

Does Dad know that you're on a sex app? Does Ryan?

[Ryan] It's not a sex app.

- It's a dating app. - Oh!

- [Ryan] And... - [Jodie] Ryan...

...yeah, I helped her make the profile.

You made Ryan help you set it up. That's appropriate.

I need to go to the toilet.

- God. - Hassan, help me.

Yeah, of course. S-sorry, Nan.

[Scoffs] Well, well done, Mum.

You've managed to violate your two gay kids.

- Platonic, but... - And your estranged husband.

I think that's a bit harsh. Jodes is on her own journey.

[Beef] I'm team bloke. Did anyone talk to John about this?

Team bloke is fine.

Mate, can you do that somewhere else, please?

I wish you'd told me you got sent a naughty picture, love.

I could have helped.

Helped how, exactly, Ros?

[Steph] I cannot deal with this.

This is why I've been in therapy this whole year,

just dealing with all of this.

So I've sent you mad, have I?

Mum, you and Dad haven't had a proper conversation in years

and now you're on a dating app behind his back?

And you're making Ryan help you,

as if he's not enmeshed enough

in your relationship dysfunction as it is?

You have no boundaries with Ros or Beef,

who are complete enablers, by the way,

and none of you know how exhausting it is

just to be around you.

OK, um, Steph, that's not true.

Well, you are just around it all the time, Ryan.

You're indoctrinated.

[Ryan] Well, yeah, exactly, Steph, I am.

I'm here and you're not.

You've come home with this ideas about how we're all wrong,

and, yeah, people may not be their best right now,

but maybe that's because

everyone has to walk on eggshells around you

just to be good enough.

My God, you can be so judgemental, Steph.

And, you know, you never used to be, but you are now.

Well, I just can't do anything right by any of you.

I'm only here because I care about Nugget.

Well, if you care so much about Nugget,

why didn't you even offer to, you know,

chip in with some money?

You're supposed to be the big-city doctor.

I'm still a registrar, Mum.

You know, I have a ton of student debt.

I would love to give money, I really would,

but I have rent in the city.

Yeah, but you should have savings, Steph.

I taught you how to be smart with your money.

Yeah, and I did have savings, Dad. I just invested them.

In what?

Therapy and boxy blazers?

No, I just invested $6,000 in Seb's business.

- [Shayla and John] What?! - Stephanie-Joy, who is this man?

And what do we actually know about him?

You gave this guy $6,000

and he can't even come down here and meet us?

Also, $6,000, wasn't it old furniture?

No, it's startup costs,

so you just have to buy the furniture first.

Mid-century furniture's, like, really valuable, so it's...

It... We discussed it as a... as a couple.

So what's the business model here?

Here's an old piece of furniture,

pay for it like it's new?

[Beef] I have to say I'm lost on this one.

He wants to take on IKEA? Good luck to him.

- [Ros] Hmm! - It's the...

The resale val...

The resale value is... is quite big.

Darling, regardless of whether it goes to Nugget or not,

I think you should call up this Seb

and say, "Listen, I'm living like a beggar..."

- [Shayla] Exactly. - [Nan] Beggar.

"..and I'd like my money back on this dud investment."

- [Nan] Yes. - You should tell him right now.

- [Shayla] I agree, Mama. - Absolutely.

[Jodie] Yes, Steph, you need to call him!

We might need that money for Nugget!

I can't just call him, Mum.

He's busy with his own family Christmas, OK?

I have texted him a thousand times about everything,

about Nugget, and he isn't replying to me!

- [Family gasps] - I wanna kill him.

- [Ros growls] - I actually wanna kill him.

So you can't get your money back?

No, I can get it back.

He just has to sell the furniture that he bought.

With your money?

With Nugget's cancer money!

Great, so our baby's sick,

our daughter's been scammed out of all of her savings.

What a fantastic Christmas.

OK, I think we should go and see him.

See who?

We should go and confront this Seb guy,

get your money back for another ass camera for Nugget

and then get on with our family Christmas.

- [Ros] I say why not? - [Hassan] I'm with Shay.

I've got things I want to say to him.

We can't just rock up. It's Christmas Eve.

OK, Steph, you can stay here or you can come with us,

but me and Hassan are going.

And I'd prefer you come with us

because you really hurt my feelings

with that bridesmaid thing before,

and if I were you, I'd want to make me happy

so I get over that in a healthy way.

I'm putting on my trackpants and I'm going.

[Hassan] Yeah, I'm gonna get the keys.

- [Shayla] Come on, kiddo. - [Hassan] Let's do this, Stephy.

- [Nugget grumbles] - [Nan] Where am I going?

[John] We're gonna get some money, Mum.

- [Nan] Money? - We'll get them ready.

♪ Now they're all following me ♪

♪ For ice in my breast at zero degrees... ♪

You OK, cuzzy?

You should be, because this is mad!

- Like, as in mad good. - Of course it's good.

She's standing up for herself.

She's saying, "Enough is enough.

"You have failed to meet my needs as a woman,

"and because of that, I am terminating this relationship.

Whoa, babe, scary.

I just got a glimpse into my future.

Oh, as if.

OK, I think I feel, um...

Yeah, really good. Really good.

- Yes, cuzzy-in-law! - Whoo!

- Whoo! - Yes!

- Whoo! - Whoo!

Oh, wait, wait, wait.

So, I play this song to hype myself up

before every important yet challenging situation.

It's actually so good.

I played this at work

before your old man gave me a promotion.

That's how good it works. Let me play it.

- Let's do it. Uh. - [Hip-hop music plays]

[Both rap] ♪ How many dudes you know roll like this? ♪

♪ How many dudes you know flow like this? ♪

♪ Not many, if any ♪

♪ Not many, if any ♪

♪ How many dudes you know got the skills to go ♪

♪ And rock a show like this? ♪

♪ Uh-uh, uh-uh ♪

♪ I don't know anybody... ♪

- Huh! - We literally don't know anyone.

[All laugh]

And the best part is...

So, that's, like, the best bit in the song,

and it comes back, like, at least two more times.

- Yeah, that's a chorus, babe. - Yeah, it's a chorus.

[Shayla] Babe, it says turn in here.

- [Music thumps] - ♪ Whoa... ♪

[Shayla] What is going on? Did you know about this, Steph?

[Engine revs]

[Handbrake engages, engine stops]

Wow. So this is where the Prime Minister lives.

OK, let's roll.

We should probably take a beat just to...

OK, we're doing this.

[Doorbell rings]

- [Chuckles] - [Guests laugh nearby]

Yes?

How can I help you?

Firstly, hello, and merry Christmas Eve.

Um, secondly, you don't know me,

but I'm here on official business.

I'm sorry, darling, I'm not following.

- Are you lost? - Apologies, madam.

But we're gonna need to speak to Sebastian.

And I'm going to need to ask why.

Yeah, sorry, but who are you?

You don't know these people, Sebastian?

Yeah, you don't know us, and that's on you.

We're your girlfriend's cousins.

Steph.

- [Seb groans in disgust] - [Steph] I'm sorry, Seb.

I've been trying to contact you.

Steph, what happened to your, uh...

It's an eye patch, bro. Haven't you ever seen a movie?

Don't change the subject.

Stephanie, darling, what's all this?

- Are you OK? What's going on? - No, I'm fine.

I'm really sorry that I didn't make it to the warm-up lunch

or the other Christmas events after that.

Seems full-on.

Uh, it's just been a really hard time because...

Oh, yes, with your dog, darling. Yes, very sad.

[Sarcastically] Yeah, you seem so sad.

Excuse me, I don't like your tone, missy.

I don't like your tone, Mosman-ass mum.

Whoa, whoa, whoa! OK, OK, OK.

Let's all take a breath.

- Alright? Babe? - Mm.

Mm.

Like we did in the class, alright?

- You ready? - Yeah.

[Both inhale]

- [Hassan] And out. - [Both exhale]

- OK, I love you. - Love you too.

Alright, what I think is that Seb and Steph

should have a proper conversation

about their relationship and the money he owes her.

- Hassan... - [Laughs]

I highly doubt Sebastian owes Stephanie money.

Oh, my God.

Well, actually, Josephine, he... he does owe me money.

I lent Seb $6,000

to start his furniture business.

He promised he'd pay me back

when he finished flipping the Danish chair collection.

Yeah, and it would come in really handy

should we go down the chemotherapy route for Nugget.

[Scoffs]

Do you owe Stephanie money, darling?

Yeah, I do.

I just wanted to do things on my own for once, Mum.

Oh, we would have given you what you needed, Sebby.

Why didn't you just ask?

- So how much was it again? - It was $6,000, madam.

- [Whispers] It's going so well. - [Whispers] I know.

- [Hassan clears throat] - [Shayla] Mm.

Alright.

OK.

I trust this won't bounce.

It won't.

OK, thank you. I trust you.

Now, why don't you two say what you need to say to each other

and then stop intruding on my family's Christmas.

You're lucky Hassan was here to relax me.

Yeah.

Steph, why are you doing this now?

Seb, I've been trying to message you.

Yeah, 'cause I'm being present with my family during Christmas.

I thought you said that you weren't gonna make it

and then you're rocking up with your eshay cousins,

like, in front of my mum?

- That's really heavy, Steph. - [Scoffs]

No, you know what's really heavy, Seb?

My dog is dying

and you don't even pretend to care.

So thank you for your parents' money,

which is actually my money.

Nugget deserves it.

[Shayla] Yes!

Nice house, big house.

[Shayla and Hassan laugh]

[Hassan] Let's go!

Is this what it's like every year?

Uh...

[Car doors close in distance]

No. Yeah.

- [Family chatters] - Hold up, here's trouble!

[Steph and Shayla cheer and exclaim]

[Family chatters excitedly]

No, no. So, I totally blacked out, but we got it!

- Oh! - [Beef] Great, a check!

That's great! I hope it doesn't bounce.

[Jodie] You got your money back. Good girl!

So proud of you, Stephy!

Alright, group hug. Group hug with our Nugget.

Let him know there's nothing to worry about. Come on.

- Oh! - Oh, Nuggy!

- [Whines] - Got your money now, darling.

We got your money.

[All talk at once]

[All chatter]

[John laughs]

[Chatter continues]

Don't you look so much better?

[Steph] Hi, baby! Hi, bubba!

[Both laugh]

[Family] Aw!

Merry Christmas Eve, Steph.

Merry Christmas Eve, Shay. [Sniffles]

[Uplifting music]

[Nugget whines softly]

[Uplifting music continues]

[Breathes deeply]

The camera! I found it!

It is literally a Christmas miracle...

[Poignant music]

[Jodie sniffles]

[Tearfully] I'm sorry, Stephy.

[Jodie] We tried, Steph.

We really tried.

Came out of nowhere.

[Tearfully] But I found the camera.

[Both sob softly]

- [Emotional piano music] - [Jodie sighs]

I'm so sorry.

I didn't know him long, but he really was special.

[Sniffles and cries]

I can bring over the ashes to you this afternoon.

[Jodie] Thank you.

Oh, and you're welcome to stay for lunch if you'd like.

I mean, only if you don't have other plans.

- Oh, yes. - [Dr. Lander] I-I don't.

So lunch would be great.

If you're happy with me being there.

Yeah.

That'd be nice.

[Gentle guitar music]

OK.

Masked pole.

Four letters

I don't know, Nan.

Is it 'stick'? That doesn't fit.

Masked pole.

It's supposed to be good for my brain.

I can't remember now. I can't remember things anymore.

Stephy...

Oh.

- Shay, I just... - I just wanted to give you this.

And, um, even if you don't want to be my bridesmaid,

I just want you to have it because it's...

...like, a pretty chic robe to wear whenever, so...

Shay, of course I'll be your bridesmaid.

It's beautiful.

- [Sniffles] - Thank you.

Um, also, cuzzy,

what's an MLM?

Oh, it's like a business

where you rely on family and friends

to recruit new members and sell things onwards.

Wow! So cool.

MLM. Mama!

- No, Shay, it's actually not... - Mama...

[Sighs]

[Nan] Steph...

- Stephy, is that you? - Yeah, it's me, Nan.

Where's Nugget?

Oh.

Um...

...why don't we get dressed, Nan?

- I am dressed! - [Laughs] I've got to get you...

You're the one that needs to be dressed.

- Look at you. - I know.

Is that what you're going to wear?

We might have some other clothes we can wear.

What's Shayla going to wear? She always looks very good.

[Sombre music]

Um, I-I'd like to say something.

[Whispers] Thanks, Stephy.

Whew. [Chuckles sadly]

Um...

[Sobs]

I always wanted a dog when I was little.

And, um, when we finally got you, you changed my life.

[Jodie chuckles]

You loved jerky.

- God, you loved humping. - [Family laughs]

And you loved us even though we are us.

[Chuckles]

[Sniffles]

[Whispers] That was beautiful.

[Ryan] Oh!

[Nan] Oh, John!

[Ryan] Dad. Dad! Dad! Hey.

- John. John, love, be careful. - No, it's fine.

- I just want it done. - Johnny, take it easy, mate.

Don't tell me to take it easy, Beef!

Dad, just stop.

Dad, just... Dad.

Dad, it's OK.

Just stay out of the way, Steph!

OK, Dad?

Why? Why? [Sobs]

[John] Why?

[Sniffles]

[Sobs]

[Poignant music]

I'm... I'm sorry.

[Weeps]

- Oh! - [Family murmurs]

[Jodie] Oh, John!

[Groans]

It's bloody beautiful, mate.

[Sobs]

It's gorgeous, John.

There's no other dog like him.

No. [Sobs]

- He was a cheeky bugger. - [Family chuckles fondly]

Yeah, he was.

And, Beef, I'm sorry I wasn't there

for your chickpea stones.

No, mate, they... It was a couple of sesame seeds.

Just sesame seeds.

- [John sobs] - [Jodie] Oh, Johnny.

- [John moans] - [Jodie] It's OK.

It's OK, love.

[John sobs]

I miss him.

[Sombre music]

[John sobs]

[Subdued chatter]

I've never seen my, uh, dad cry before.

Really?

Ever?

No, I think he actually cried

when his last car had an oil leak.

The mechanic told him it had to be impounded.

[Both laugh]

Um, I took your advice, by the way.

Told Seb how I was feeling.

Oh.

Um, I didn't know that was advice.

[Both laugh]

Good. That's... that's good.

How... how did it go?

Yeah, not great.

Um, I think it's probably over between us.

I'm sorry.

No, it's, um, probably for the best.

You know, sometimes things just... run their course.

True.

So, John, did you have anything you wanted to say about...

...what you saw on my phone?

[Inhales] Yep.

Downgrade.

Very funny, John.

[Chortles]

I've already got a vision, Mama.

Yeah, of course you do.

Thigh-high split, plunge neck.

Perfect. You got a beautiful body and a great sense of style.

- Yep. - And hair.

Yeah, hair, I'm thinking quite, um...

...quite big, piled on top...

- Of course. - ...or something like that.

[Family chatters]

Yeah... [Chatter continues]

- Hey, Mum. - Hey, love.

Decorations look good.

- Ryan did most of them. - [Chuckles]

Look, I am sorry about you and Seb, Steph.

- You don't have to say that. - No, I mean it.

I-I want you to know...

I was only asking about when he was coming

because I want you to know

that we support any relationship that's special to you.

I don't know how special it was, Mum.

Well, who knows?

And anyway, there's plenty more fish in the sea.

People who see how special you are.

- [Family chatters] - [Laughs]

Good to be here. Thank you for having me.

Look,

I know I don't always say the right things,

but you must know I...

I don't care about rum balls.

I just want to spend time with you.

And love you.

And I've missed you.

I just, you know...

I don't have a therapist to tell me all the right words to say.

It's OK, Mum. I-I know.

But I am, like, also sorry,

um, you know...

Being distant.

Steph, it's OK, Steph.

- It's OK. - Yeah.

- It's OK. - [Sniffles]

- What am I gonna do? - About what?

About the pictures of the you-know-what on my phone.

- Yeah, um... - I mean, I haven't responded.

I don't know what your chat has been like, Mum,

but if you're not interested anymore,

you can always just, like, unmatch that person.

What, just unmatch them, just like that?

Yeah.

- Really? - Yeah.

[Hassan] Babe, babe, look who it is.

Who's this coming in?

- [Gasps] No! - [Cutlery clanks]

[Shayla] No way!

- Oh. - Oh, my God.

- [John] What? - [Clears throat]

- [Nan] Who is he? - [Ryan] I think that's...

- Is that Seb? - [Shayla] Yes, it's Seb.

- Who? Steph's boyfriend? - The boyfriend.

[Nan] Whose boyfriend?

The, uh, black outfits are pretty rock star.

Our dog died, Seb.

Oh, damn.

I'm so sorry, Steph.

And fam.

At least you got to say goodbye, though, right?

What are you doing here, bro?

Hello again.

[Hassan] Hey.

Merry Christmas, everyone.

[Beef] Merry Christmas, mate.

[Shayla] Is that it?

You could have written that in a Chrissy card, babe.

Do you maybe want to go somewhere private and talk?

No, no, not happening.

Anything you want to say to Steph, you can say

in front of the whole family.

- Yeah. - That's right, Shay.

- That's right. - Yep.

OK. Well...

I'm sorry if I let you down.

Like, wasn't intuitive to your needs

or whatever.

It's just, you rocking up to my house

wearing an eye patch looking for money,

I was like, "Yeah, OK, something's disconnected here."

[Shayla] Hm.

And I'm here to fix that, you know, by...

...hearing you.

Seb, I really appreciate the effort...

Thank you.

But I think you should go.

What?

- You should be with Grum Grum. - [Shayla] Mm-hm.

Steph, what do you mean? I ditched everything to be here.

- Like, on Christmas. - No, I know.

I took a $200 Uber to be here.

- What? - $200!

- You're kidding me! - [All exclaim at once]

What's wrong with you?

I'd be demanding a helicopter flight for that.

Outrageous what some of those companies do.

[Shayla] That's right, Dad.

[Steph] Yeah, it's just a bit late, Seb.

I just want to be with my family.

- [Shayla chuckles] - [Seb] OK. Um...

So...

I'm just struggling to keep up, Steph,

because, like, you hate your family,

you don't want to be with them...

What?

You want to spend Christmas with my family,

then you bail on that, and then I'm here

and you're like, "Go home," like, what...

What's going on? Like, you're being crazy.

- Whoa! - [John] Hey, hey, hey!

Taking a $200 car trip's being crazy, mate!

And if you think the drivers get that, you'd be wrong.

- Absolutely. - OK, maybe I am being crazy.

But I just want more, Seb.

I want someone who wants to be there for me

and it's easy for them, and maybe even my family like them.

[Seb] Mm, OK.

Well...

Well, great.

I just think you should go, Seb.

Easier said than done. [Chuckles]

Like, where the fuck am I?

[Scoffs] Oh, that's nice.

Oh, mate, zero manners.

[Steph] Sorry, Seb.

It's fine.

I'll just, um...

...just Uber home.

- [All protest] - Oh, no!

- Waste of money. - Holy...

Hassan, darling,

why don't you give him a lift to the station.

- Well, I don't heaps want to. - Yeah.

But I will.

- [John] Good on you, mate. - [Ros] Good boy.

Babe, babe, can you save a slice of pav for me?

- Yeah. - [Hassan] Oi!

You want some pav for the road?

No, I'm good.

[Hassan] What, you never had pav before?

You get the meringue from Coles,

delicious cream and fruit on top.

No, I've had it. It just...

It's less calories than you think, you know?

I've been basically eating chicken for a couple of weeks

'cause I'm getting married and I'm shredding for the wedding.

- That's my fiancé, Shayla. - [Family chatters]

[Chatter continues]

- [Ros] No, please! - [Nan] Who was that person?

- Onya, Stephy. - Should we put out the Scotch?

- Stephy! - [Ryan] Mum.

- Oh. - Go, go.

[John] Time for one.

[Steph] Hey, Doctor... Um, Ella.

Ella, slow... slow down.

Dr. Lander, where are you going?

I...

I think I should leave, Steph.

I mean, with... with Seb rocking up...

You...

You said you wanted to be with your family, so...

Oh, no, I didn't mean that about you.

No, no, that's OK, really, I-I...

You clearly have a lot going on, so...

Um...

I really just came to say that I am sorry

about Nugget.

He really was special.

And I-I'm a vet, so I've seen all of them.

[Chuckles]

Well...

...you guys have a good Christmas.

Um, Ella, you should stay.

I-I would love it if, um, if you stayed.

And, um... [Sighs] ...that's what you want?

Yep, that's, um... that's what I want.

You know, in case I need a distraction

from the endless pain and suffering

that I'm in.

- Well, I'm... - Mm-hm.

I am known for my distracting magnetism.

[Both laugh]

- [Uplifting music] - [Family chatters indistinctly]

Dad, yours is coming.

Ryan.

Ryan, this is for you.

I had to hide it because you always peek.

- Yeah... - From all of us.

Do you like that, John?

- Oh, my God. - [Family chatters]

You know what? I got you...

- You didn't get me... - [Chatter continues]

- Thank you. - No way!

- Nana, this is for you. - Oh, thank you.

That's so nice.

- Merry Christmas, darling. - You too, Mum.

[Chatter continues]

- It's kinda nice, you know? - [Uplifting music]

[Jazzy music]

♪ The holiday's here ♪

♪ With all of its cheer ♪

♪ Come join us ♪

♪ Sending our wishes ♪

♪ To you at Christmas ♪

♪ The elves making toys ♪

♪ For girls and boys ♪

♪ In Toy Town ♪

♪ It's fun all around ♪

♪ Completely spellbound ♪

♪ The snowflakes ♪

♪ Whirling in the sky ♪

♪ Children spy... ♪