All language subtitles for L.A.Law.S08E09.Rhyme.and.Punishment.1080p.DSNP.WEB-DL.DDP5.1.H.264-NTb_track4_[eng]

- Hey, how are you doing?

- Fine, thank you.

- Get all of your shopping done?

- Most of it.

How about you?
- [chuckles] Nothing.

I'm going to be in the
stores like every night

between now and Christmas.

[sighs]

- That's a pretty cross.

- Mm, thanks.

- Could I ask you a question?

- Mm-hmm.

- Do you wear it as
a religious symbol?

- As opposed to what?

- The way it looks?

- I don't know.

I don't usually
separate the two things.

- I was just curious.

- What are you curious about?

- Well, I guess I'm curious
about whether or not

you're a religious person.

And I know that's
none of my business.

- Well, it just so happens I am.

[clicking]

Wait, I'm not religious
the way you are.

- That's all right.

- Is that all right?

- I don't mean to sound
as if I'm judging you.

It's just sometimes I
feel that people who wear

crosses, especially who
wear ones like that,

it's just fashion.

They don't think about
what it stands for.

- You know, Jane, I went to
Catholic school for 12 years.

I know about Jesus Christ.

I know about the Blessed Virgin.

I know all the
stations of the cross

and all the sacraments and all
about the lives of the

saints, OK?

And whether or not I still
go to church, whether or not

I read the Bible or even own a
Bible, and this is as much mine

to wear as it is yours.

- You're absolutely right.

[theme music]

- (SINGING) In the lane,
snow is glistening.

A beautiful sight, we're happy
tonight walking in a

winter wonderland.

Gone away is the bluebird.

Here to stay is a new bird.

He sings a love song
as we go along walking

in a winter wonderland.

- Pincus versus Pincus

- We represent Nat Pincus.

I'm appearing with the
permission of the court.

- Wait a minute.

You represent the Nat
Pincus, the comedian?

- Right.

- You're kidding.

- What's the case?

- Nat's living with
a woman who's about

30 years younger than him.

His son thinks she's taking
undue financial advantage.

And he wants his father
declared incompetent

to manage his assets.

- You see, everyone thinks
a young woman could only

be with an older
man for his money.

- The truth is, while I
think this woman loves him,

I've had my doubts about
how competent Nat is.

- That's no youngster.

- Does that correspond to his
being incompetent, Douglas?

- Absolutely not.

- Move along.

- Ruskin versus Del Giotto.

- This is mine.

We represent Bernard
Ruskin, a poetry publisher.

He owned a mailing list of
people who buy poetry books

and attend poetry readings.

A former employee
appropriated the list

and gave it to Mr.
Del Giotto, to whom

he's currently employed.

- Is this likely to go to trial?

- We're very far apart, it may.

- Well, then why
are you handling it?

- Because no one
else is available.

It's certainly not
because poetry is

something that appeals to me.

- Oh, I never
thought that it did.

You just don't
usually try cases.

- If I need help,
I'll ask for it.

- You're a little defensive,
aren't you, Douglas?

- Not at all.

I'm not at all defensive.

- I happen to love poetry.

- Do you really?

- Yeah.

Emily Dickinson, TS Eliot,
Shakespeare's sonnets,

I love that stuff.

- Oh, I would like to remind
everyone that for this

year's McKenzie-Brackman
Christmas party,

we are committed to a major
gala, a chance to show

off your renovations, eh?

- Maybe you can recite
something, Douglas.

[laughter]

- This meeting is adjourned.

- What is your
relationship to Nat Pincus?

- He's my father.

- How often do you
see your father?

- I used to see him
at least once a week.

That fell off to twice a
month, then once a month.

And then he stopped
wanting to see me at all.

- Was the diminution of
visits with your father

related to any specific
change in your father's life?

- It was related to
Morgan Farrell coming

to live in my father's house.

- Would you describe for
us what your understanding

of your father's relationship
with Miss Farrell is?

- She's his mistress.

- And what was it about her
moving into the house that

resulted in your not
seeing your father

as often as you had before?

- I felt as though she
was controlling my father.

I felt as though she was
taking advantage of him.

I spoke my mind, I became
unwelcome in their home.

- What specifically
led you to believe

that Miss Farrell was taking
advantage of your father?

- A week after she moved in,
he bought her a new Jaguar.

Inside of the first
two months, she

bought herself a Cartier watch.

Two months ago, he put
the house in her name.

- Would you describe
how Miss Farrell

behaved toward your father?

- She belittled him.

It seemed to me that he was
frightened of her, that he

was desperate for her approval.

I felt then and I feel now that
it is my duty as my father's

son to intervene.

- There are those who would say
that you're after his money.

- I don't need his money.
I have enough money.

- Then why not let
it go, Mr. Pincus?

Why not just let your
father live his own life?

- Because I love him, and I
don't want to see him get hurt.

- I have nothing further.

- Mr. Pincus, you said that Miss
Farrell belittled your father?

Could you tell us the
kinds of things she did?

- She'd talk down to him.

She'd get impatient.

She'd interrupt him.

When you tell a
joke, she'd hold up

fingers to let him know how many
times he'd recently told it.

My father doesn't
get quiet too often.

She could make him get quiet.

- She also encouraged him to
perform again, didn't she?

- Yes, she did.

But my father didn't
want to perform.

He-- he wanted to sit in
kibbutz with his friends

at the Friars Club.

He wanted to play cards.

- Your father says
otherwise, does he not?

- My father says otherwise.

- You don't believe him?

- My father is absolutely
terrified about getting

on stage at this
point in his life.

He is terrified about
getting through a routine.

- Is it that he's terrified
or that you're embarrassed?

- It's not like it
used to be, Pop.

- Don't talk to me.

- Gentlemen, please let's not
address each other directly.

- Isn't it a fact, Mr.
Pincus, that you walked out

on your father when he was
in the middle of performing

at a Friars Club roast?

- Objection, I think that's
completely irrelevant.

- When I was 10 years
old, I sat under a table

at the nightclub of the
Concorde to watch you perform.

I was embarrassed.

I was thrilled beyond belief.

But you always said that
you would know when to stop.

You said you didn't want
what happened to other comics

to happen to you.

It happened, Dad.

It happened.

And I got to tell
you when to stop.

I got to protect you.

- What is the nature of your
operation, Mr. Del Giotto?

- I'm a promoter.

- What do you promote?

- All these shows,
rock concerts,

celebrity softball
games, celebrity golf,

celebrity tennis--

we do it all.

- Including, of recent
times, poetry readings?

- Right.

- You have an event coming up
later this week, do you not?

- Yes, I do.

I have a major event scheduled.

- How did you go about
advertising this event?

- I put a couple of
ads in the paper,

and we have a few
radio spots running.

- You also use direct
mail, do you not?

- Yes, we do.

- That would suggest that
you use a mailing list.

Is that correct?

- Right.

- How did you come into
possession of that mailing

list, Mr Del Giotto?

- Well, uh, an individual
who works for me compiled it.

- What was the name
of that individual?

- Ira Mytelka.

- Isn't it a fact that
Ira Mytelka compiled

that list while working
for the Southern

California Poetry Society?

- I wouldn't know
how to answer that.

- Where was Ira working
when you approached him?

You would know the
answer to that.

- Mr. Brackman, could you
control your client, please?

- You represent
everything I detest.

- Bernard--

- There's a vast untapped market
in this country of people who

are bound by the
love of verse, and I

intend to tap into that market.

- You're not entitled
to tap into that market.

You have no
credibility as a poet.

You have no credibility
as a publisher.

- Meantime, I'm the one
who's out there doing it.

And I'm the one who's
getting them in the tent,

and I'm the one
who's got Mamie Van

Doren coming in to read poetry.

So don't talk to me
about credibility!

[panting]

[knocking]

- Hello, Tommy.

- Roxanne.

- Thanks for seeing me.

I know my phone call must
have seemed out of the blue.

- Is everything OK?

- Oh, everything's fine.

- How's that baby?

- [chuckles]
She's-- she's great.

David Meyer and I got remarried.

- Ah, yeah, I heard.

- David wants to adopt Casey.

In order for that to
happen, we need for you

to surrender parental rights.

I assume that you'd have
no objection to doing that.

- You know I've
never even seen her.

- Well, she's right outside.

Do you want me to bring her in?

- Yeah.

- OK.

[infant cooing]

- I'd like to ease any
potential awkwardness here

by saying that Roxanne has
filled me in on the details

of your relationship.

And I just want you to know
that the feeling I'm left with

is one of overwhelming
gratitude.

- Hey, David.

- This is Casey.

- Oh, you did good, Rox.

She's so pretty.

Can I hold her for a minute?

- Ah.

- Hey.

Mm-mm-mm.

- [laughs]

- Come on, sweetie.

Come on.

Yes.

- Can I have a little
time to think about this?

- Do you need to think about it?

- Yeah.

- What do you consider
to be a little time?

- I don't know, Roxanne.

- Well, we're leaving for Europe
in less than two weeks, Tommy.

- I can't help that.

- Let's go, David.

[infant whimpering]

- Tell me what happened.

- What happened is that
Tommy called me this morning

and said that he wasn't going
to agree to the adoption.

- Can he do that?

- He's the biological father.

He does have his right where
his child is concerned.

- You remember, Arnie.

He told me he had no faith in
his ability to be a parent!

- Which in the court's eyes
will certainly help your case.

- You think this
will get to court?

- I think we should
do everything we can

to avoid getting to that point.

- Well, what should we do?

- I think we should sit down,
the four of us, discuss this.

Negotiate with Tommy.

Find out what he
wants and how we

can possibly accommodate him.

- What if he still says no?

- Then we take him to court.

- Tell me something.

- What's that?

- I know I'm still new here.

The other day, Miss Halliday
said something to me.

And I opened up my mouth to her.

Is that, like, out
of line here or what?

- What'd you say?

- Well, she implied that
this cross that I was wearing

was sacrilegious.

- Did she say that?

- Well, not in so many words.

But I know that's
what she meant.

- What did you say?

- Well, I told her I was
a good Catholic girl.

And that I didn't need
religious instruction from her.

- Well, that doesn't sound
all that out of line.

- Hm.

I know she's the lawyer,
and I'm the secretary.

But, mm, so what?

- For what it's
worth, I've never

found Jane to be particularly
judgmental about stuff

like that.

- [scoffs] Really?

- She might have been
just making conversation.

- Hm, I don't know.

- You were probably just
thinking about all those times

the nuns chastised you.

- What makes you think the
nuns ever chastised me, huh?

- In 1985, you were
hired by Bernard Ruskin

to work for the
California Poetry Society.

Is that right?

- Yes.

- What exactly were
you hired to do?

- General clerical work.

We published a number
of poetry anthologies.

We sponsored poetry readings.

I was basically in
charge of the paperwork.

- When did you leave your job at
the California Poetry Society?

- I left in 1991.

- And you left to go to
work for Bobby Del Giotto.

Is that correct?

- Yes.

- It was you who
furnished Mr. Del

Giotto with the mailing list.

- Yes, it was.

- Did you receive permission
either express or implied

from Mr. Ruskin to do so?

- As far as I'm concerned, I
didn't need his permission.

I compiled that mailing list.

I think that list was mine
to do with as I pleased.

- I think you'll find the
law says otherwise, Ira.

That list was my list.

Those people were my people.

- Mr. Mytelka, is it not
correct that while you were

in the employ of
Mr. Ruskin, Mr. Del

Giotto approached you and
offered you more money

if you would go work for him?

- The money didn't matter to me.

Believe me, I didn't put in the
kind of hours I did for Bernard

for the stinking $300 a week.

- Why did you?

- Because he was supposed to
publish a book of my poetry.

He was supposed to
give me my own reading.

I worked for him for six years.

And the whole time, he
kept stringing me along.

And he never did
what he said he'd do!

- You weren't ready.

- I was ready, Bernard.

- I gave you over 200
poems to choose from.

- I felt that you
were derivative, Ira.

- You always say that!

How was I derivative?

- You aped the
beat poets and fell

prey to their worst excesses.

- I did not ape the beat!

- Yes, you did!

At least let's not use
this occasion to corrupt

our aesthetic judgment.
- All right.

I've had it.

What's it going to
take to settle this?

- What are you offering?

- Bobby, I'm not sure we
have to offer anything.

- I don't care, Lanny.

- I got the expo
starting tomorrow night.

I can't keep going around and
around with this nonsense.

- Give us a figure.

- $15,000.

- What are you paying
Mamie Van Doren?

- That's not your concern.

- I am not going to turn
the sacred into the profane

for a few pieces of silver.

I have devoted myself
to the veneration

of the poet, the true poet.

I am not about to
reconcile with a man

who would propagate the
masturbatory revelations

of sitcom actors.

Your poet expo has
met the resolve

of a man who believes
in the verities

of WH Auden and Ezra Pound.

And I intend to do
everything within my power

to make sure that that grotesque
event never takes place!

- What is your
occupation, Mr. Tavelman?

- Personal management.

- Do you know Nat Pincus?

- For more than 40 years.

- What is your
relationship with him?

- I was his manager.

- You're speaking
in the past tense.

Are you no longer his manager?

- That's right.

I am no longer his manager.

- What were the
circumstances under which

you stopped being his manager?

- The circumstances
were that he fired me.

- What was your understanding
of the reason for that?

- Because I told him the truth.

He wants to buy
her clothes, fine.

Jewelry, fine.

A car, also fine.

But I drew the line at
putting the house in her name.

And I drew the
line at letting her

make decisions about his life.

- Would you give your impression
of Mr. Pincus's mental

condition over the last year?

- Objection, the
witness isn't qualified

to respond to that question.

- Your Honor, it's not coming
in as expert testimony.

It's coming in as
the lay opinion

of someone who has seen Mr.
Pincus at least once a week

for 40 years.

- That doesn't qualify him to
testify to a mental condition.

- Oh, the objection
is overruled.

The witness can answer.

- Mr. Tavelman?

- His mental condition
is that he's slipping.

He gets confused.

He says things, and then he
forgets that he said them.

We would talk about finances.

We would talk about the girl.

We would talk about, uh,
what we had for lunch.

Sometimes he could
follow the conversation.

And sometimes he couldn't.

- Now, I would like
to ask for an expert

opinion, Mr. Tavelman.

I'd like to ask
what the condition

of Nat Pincus's finances are.

- They're the worst
they've been in 35 years.

He has less money in the bank
and a greater tax liability

than he's had since
the late '50s.

- And what would you
attribute this to?

- I attribute it to
her and to the fact

that Nat can't say no to her.

- Objection.

- Sustained.

- I have nothing further.

- How did you feel about Nat's
performing again, Mr. Tavelman?

- If I thought it was something
that Nat wanted to do,

it would be one thing.

The only reason he's doing it is
because Miss Farrell over there

wants him to.

She wants to be a producer,
and he's her ticket.

- Ask the witness's remarked
regarding what Morgan

Farrell wants be stricken.

- So stricken.

- It's a fact, is it not, sir,
that in the last four years you

served-- at least nominally--
as Nat Pincus's manager, you got

him no bookings of any kind?

- He didn't want any bookings.

He didn't want to be working.

- You say that
notwithstanding the fact that

soon after Miss Farrell
began serving as his manager,

he was working.

- Yeah, he was working.

He was working for her.

- Mr. Tavelman, you said
that you drew the line

at transferring the house.

You drew the line at Miss
Farrell making decisions.

Was it really your
job to draw the line?

- Exactly!

- Mr. Pincus.

- Hey, Junior, we go
back to 1953 together.

Nobody ever told me what
was or what wasn't my job.

- Is it possible, Mr.
Tavelman, that you're

angry because
somebody finally did?

- Oh, please.

I'm up here for only one
reason, because I love this guy.

Nat, you're making
an idiot of yourself.

And you're doing
it over a broad.

- You should be so lucky, Jack.

You should be so lucky
to have one like this.

- Mr. Pincus, you're
wearing my patience.

- Excuse me, Judge.

It so happened I got
this jacket at Sy Devore.

- I have no further
questions, Your Honor.

- What I think we can
accomplish here is talk

some things through,
work out an arrangement

we can all live with.

- We are not unconcerned with
your feelings in all this, Tom.

- No?

- Absolutely not.

It is a sensitive proposition.

And if we have been
cavalier in any way

about what you are thinking
or feeling, then we apologize.

I think that's a fair
statement, don't you, Roxanne?

- We'd be very
interested in hearing

what it is you are thinking.

- I have some concerns
about my daughter's future.

And I think I'm within
my rights to have them.

- No argument here.

- I don't consider her
to be your daughter.

- Roxanne, let's try
and be constructive.

- And let's address
Tom's concerns

about Dave Meyer, father.

Will I be loving?

Answer, yes.

Will I be steadfast?

Answer, another yes.

- Forgive me.

I don't even know you.

What I know is that
when Roxanne was

married to you the first time,
she was utterly miserable.

- OK, that's fair.

I won't deny that Roxanne and
I went through the blue period.

But the point I want to
hammer home right now

is that things are different.

She is, if I may say so,
Roxanne, not miserable now.

I love her and her
daughter very much.

And there's nothing I want more
than to take care of the both

of them.

- With all due respect,
Dave, that's lip service.

You want something,
you're saying what you

think you have to to get it.

But there is no indication
that this marriage

is going to work out any
better than the first one did.

- Who the hell do
you think you are?

- Roxanne, wait a minute.

- (SHOUTING) Who the hell do
you think you are to sit there

and-- and pass judgment
on him, our marriage,

or anything else pertaining
to my daughter's life?

- Roxanne--
- You walked away.

You walked away from me.

You walked away from the
child you helped create.

Suddenly, you've got concerns?

Suddenly, you've got
opinions about things?

Oh, I don't want to
hear your opinions!

I don't want to
hear your concerns.

As far as I can see, you
have absolutely nothing

to say, not about me, not about
my marriage, not about my kid!

I don't want you in her life.

I don't want you in my life!

We don't need you, Tommy!

We don't want you.

[somber music]

- Miss Farrell, would you
describe for the court

the type of relationship
you have with Mr. Pincus?

- Nat and I live together.

- Is it reasonable
to assume then

that you're in a
position to observe

him over the course of a day?

- Yes.

- In your opinion,
is Mr. Pincus frail?

- No.

- Is he apt to become confused?

- No more so than I am.

- Would you describe the
state of his health generally?

- He has some health problems.

His pressure will go up.

His arthritis will bother him.

He has to take it easy
more now than in the past.

But I'll tell you something.

He's got all of his faculties.

- At the time you met him,
wasn't that Pincus actively

performing as a comedian?

- No, he wasn't.

- Have you encouraged him
to go back out on stage

as a comedian, Miss Farrell?

- Yes, I did.

- Did you pressure him
to go back on stage?

- No, I did not.

Nat was performing
his whole life.

He got back out on stage
because he wanted to.

- It's been alleged that
you wield a great deal

of influence over Nat Pincus.

How do you respond to that?

- I don't wield anything.

Nat loves me.

When you love somebody, you
want to make them happy.

I think that goes
both ways for us.

- I have no further
questions, Your Honor.

- Is it your testimony,
Miss Farrell,

that Nat Pincus is competent
to manage his own affairs?

- Yes, it is.

- Did Nat pick out the Jaguar?

- He wanted to buy me a car.

I picked out the Jaguar.

- How about the Cartier watch?

- He wanted to buy me a gift.

We went shopping.

I told him what I liked.

- After about a month
of living together,

you didn't have to
tell him, did you?

- I don't know what that means.

- That means that you had Nat
set up credit cards for you.

You had his checking accounts.

You were free to spend Nat's
money any way you wanted,

weren't you?

- I wanted it that way.

I did it.

I wanted it that way.

- Mr. Pincus, that's enough.

- Your Honor, I would object to
this whole line of questioning.

The issue here is
competence, not

the relationship between
Mr. Pincus and Miss Farrell.

- Your Honor, we would
argue that the basis

for the relationship
between these two people

is Mr. Pincus's competence
or lack thereof.

We would argue that Miss
Farrell has taken full advantage

of that lack of competence.

And I believe that we're
entitled to demonstrate that.

- The court would agree.

The objection is overruled.

- Whose idea was it to put
the house in your name,

Miss Farrell?

- It was Nat's.

He said it was better
for taxes that way.

- Better for taxes?

Do you recall an
incident that took

place in Nathanael's
restaurant on the morning

of March 19, 1992?

- I know what
you're referring to.

- While having breakfast
there, you and Mr. Pincus

had an argument.
Is that right?

- Yes.

- And you walked out
of the restaurant,

leaving Mr. Pincus behind.

Did you not?

- Yes, I did.

- How did Mr. Pincus get
home that day, Miss Farrell?

- He came home in a police car.

- Isn't what happened that
Nat Pincus tried to reach you

on the phone, couldn't, wandered
lost around Beverly Hills

until he was finally
picked up by the police

because he was found
sitting on someone's lawn

and crying at 9
o'clock that night?

- He became disoriented!

We'd had a fight.

It wasn't because he's
senile or he can't

decide things for himself.

Could have happened to
anybody what happened to him.

I never should have
left him there.

- Don't upset yourself, honey.

Don't upset yourself.

- Nat--

- Mr. Pincus--

- Don't pay attention
to any of this.

What's going on here has
nothing to do with you.

- We can't stop the expo
from going forward, Bernard.

- And why is that?

- We don't have adequate
grounds for an injunction.

- That sounds very
general to me, Douglas.

Tell me specifically.

What grounds are we lacking?

- A showing of irreparable harm.

You can't get a temporary
restraining order

without a showing of immediate
and irreparable harm,

particularly when there's
a third party involved--

in this case, those
people who have

already bought the tickets.

- Well, I'm not sure
I accept that thesis.

- I've had a lot of people
working on this, Bernard.

I've researched this
quite thoroughly.

- I must say, I'm disappointed.

- We're still proceeding
with the lawsuit.

- Well, I would assume so.

- You know, I have to tell
you something, Bernard.

- What's that?

- I've been reading a
little poetry lately.

- Is that right?

- Last night, unable to
sleep, I found myself thumbing

through a volume of Kipling.

"Though I've belted
you and flayed you,

by the living God that made you,
you're a better man than I am.

Gunga Din."

Pretty great, wouldn't you say?

- Great?

No.

- You don't think "Gunga
Din's" a great poem?

- No, Douglas, I don't.

I think it's
mawkish, sentimental,

hopelessly paternalistic
reactionary doggerel.

You certainly have
the right to enjoy it.

But rest assured,
it doesn't even

faintly resemble a great poem.

- Nothing by Kipling?

- No, Douglas,
nothing by Kipling.

- Mr. Pincus, a great
deal is made of the fact

that you resumed performing.

I'd like you to tell the
court why you did so.

- What should I do?

I'm a comedian.

Comedians perform.

- But you had
stopped performing.

What was it that
made you start again?

- She did.

She became my manager.

She became my agent.

All of a sudden, I had work.

Before she came
into the picture,

most people thought I was dead.

Two old Jews run into one
another on the street.

One looks at the other and
says, was it you or your brother

who died?

- Mr. Pincus, I
appreciate the humor.

Nonetheless, if
you could, I'd like

you to confine your remarks
to answering the questions.

- It was apropos, Judge.

That's all.

- Mr. Pincus, do
you read the paper?

- Everyday.

- Do you vote?

- Every election, twice.

- Are you taking any
medication on a regular basis?

- Uh, my pressure, that's it.

- Are you prone to become
disoriented or confused?

- Uh--

- Nat.

- It happened at one time
after leaving Nate 'n Al's.

That's it.

I had the flu.

I wasn't feeling well.

I stepped out onto
Beverly Drive.

I didn't know where I was.

- Mr. Pincus, I would
like you to tell the court

whether you feel
as though you can

still manage your own affairs.

- Yes, I can!

My son may not approve of
what I do with my money,

he may not approve of who I
choose to be friends with,

he may not approve of me
being back on the stage,

last time I looked, I
didn't need his approval.

- I've no further questions.

- Thank you.

- Is it your
testimony, Mr. Pincus,

that you are in all respects
capable of performing again?

- My dear, when
they stop laughing,

I'll know it's time
to call it quits.

- How about when you have to
be escorted off the stage?

- You're talking
about the Friars Club.

That's not what happened.

- Is it your testimony
that you were

not escorted off the stage?

- It was a bet.

I worked it into the
routine, you know?

- Was rambling incoherently
for 10 minutes on the stage

prior to that also a bet?

- Everybody's a critic.

- Mr. Pincus, that
Friars Club appearance

was part of a larger effort.

Was it not?

- I don't know what
means larger effort, huh?

- Was not Miss Farrell
trying to produce a special

on old comedians
for HBO or Showtime

or whoever she could sell it to?

- She's still going to.

- Isn't what
happened, Mr. Pincus,

that Miss Farrell browbeat
you into performing?

- Absolutely not.

- Did you or did you
not tell your son

that Miss Farrell had
threatened to leave

you if you did not perform?

- Absolutely not.

- Did you tell your son that
she had promised to reward

you with oral sex if you did?

- Objection, Your Honor.

- I never would have
repeated something like that.

- I have no further questions.

- Excuse me.

You're almost through?

- No, I'm going to be a while.

[knocks]

- Ann?

- Yeah?

- I'm going to do something
that I thought I would mention

to you on the off chance
that it might appeal

to you as something to do.

- What?

- Just because of what you
said in the staff meeting,

vis a vis your appreciation
of poetry, that's

why I thought I'd mention it.

- Mention what, Douglas?

You haven't mentioned anything.

- There's something
called a poetry expo.

Given our client's pending
action against the promoter,

I have to go.

I thought you might
actually want to go.

That's the reason
I mentioned it.

- I would love to go.

[guitar strumming]

- Goodbye time, goodbye lawn.

I'll not look you in the eye.

There's a round in East Texas.

And one of us must die.

[guitar strumming]

- I think we could
probably move on.

- I can't help but feel as
though this does represent

a corruption of some sort.

- I don't know, Douglas.

People enjoy this.

Who's to say what serious
poetry and what's not?

- This is by Allen Ginsberg.

And the name of it is "Howl."

- I can't believe
that Mamie Van Doren

is actually sitting there.

I was in love with her.

- You knew she was
going to be here, right?

- But I didn't think
she'd actually show.

- "I saw the best minds
of my generation destroyed

by madness, starving,
hysterical, naked, dragging

themselves through the
negro streets at dawn,

looking for an angry fix."

- When was it you
were in love with her?

- I was a teenager.

Outside of a few relatives
and some school teachers,

she may have been the first
woman I ever had dreams about.

- "--of night.

[strumming]

I'm with you in Rockland.

In my dreams, you walk
dripping from a sea journey

on the highway across
America, in tears,

to the door of my cottage
in the Western night."

[cheers]

Mamie Van Doren,
ladies and gentlemen.

[applause]

A big hand, please.

Isn't she something?

OK.

There's both
literature and business

opportunities on display here.

So if you're a fledgling
Allen Ginsberg,

and you want to see
yourself in print,

there's a number of very
attractive and affordable

self-publishing packages you
want to find out more about.

And for those of you who
want to stick around here,

we have the avant garde
poetry of Ira Mytelka.

[few clapping]

- And they had a reading--

- Excuse me.

Miss Van Doren?
- Yes?

- I just want to say
I've never forgotten you

from High School Confidential.

- Aren't you sweet?

- And I've never
forgotten you from 3

Nuts in Search of a Bolt.

- [laughs] Well, thanks.

- And you know, I'd just like
to invite you to our office

Christmas party.

- I'll try and make it.

- It'll be fun.

- I'm taking handfuls of Saint
Joseph aspirin for children,

and I'm loving what
it does to me--

the ratcheting,
ratcheting, ratcheting.

It's still.

It's finally still.

- Look at yourself, Fievel.

Look what you've
surrounded yourself with.

- Bernard.

- I thought you wanted
to be taken seriously.

I thought that was
the whole point.

- What I want is to be heard.

What I want is for my poems
to be read and listened

to by people from all
different walks of life,

not just by
self-appointed arbiters

of what's worthy and
serious and what's not.

I have no trouble whatsoever
looking at myself, Bernard.

I'm up on a stage.

I'm reading my poetry.

And Mr. Del Giotto said
he would get me published.

That right there makes
me a lot better off

than I ever was with you.

Gregory Corso says,
poets walk with kings.

And that's what I want.

I want to walk with kings.

- [non-english]

- What?

- Your reading was wonderful.

- Oh, oh, thank you.

I really appreciate you--

- Tommy, why don't you begin?

- Actually, I'd like to
say something to Roxanne--

alone, if that's OK.

- OK.

- All right.

We'll be in my office.

- I'm listening.

- I made a lot of
mistakes this past year.

I know that.

But when I looked
into our baby's face,

seemed like a miracle
that something so good

came out of all those mistakes.

I'm asking that you not
shut me out of her life.

- What exactly do you want?

- I-- I want to read
her bedtime stories,

help her with her homework.

I want to start a college fund.

I want to pay for her wedding.

It's too late for me
to make it up to you.

But I got a chance
to make it up to her.

I want her to know me, Roxanne.

I want her to love
me not because I'm

her biological father but
because I've been there

for her, because
she'll know there

isn't anything in
the world I care

about more than her happiness.

I-- I may not have the
right to ask it of you, Rox.

But I'm asking anyway.

Let me be her father.

- All right.

What was so important
that it couldn't wait?

- We have a proposal to make.

- What kind of proposal?

- We drop our lawsuit
in return for you

applying your promotional
efforts to Mr. Ruskin's work?

- What does that mean?

- Mr. Ruskin would like to
enter into a joint venture,

whereby his poetry
anthologies and journals are

marketed by you.

He's interested in you
distributing a catalog

of spoken word records.

And he would like a
booth at the poetry expo.

- Well, well--

- No doubt you'll view this
as an occasion for gloating.

- I have to say that
some amount of gloating

would be appropriate,
wouldn't you?

- I assume you're
curious as to the cause

of this change of heart.

- Hey, Bernard.

I know what caused it.

You came to the
hotel last night.

You saw the scene.

You saw what I can do.

And you said to yourself,
how can I be a part of this?

- What I said to
myself was that there

were some projects where
perhaps the two of us

could combine our talents.

- Like what?

- Like I was thinking of
a Robert Lowell festival.

Also, 1994 is the
sesquicentennial,

the 150th anniversary of
Gerard Manley Hopkins' birth.

I thought perhaps we could do
something surrounding that.

- Like what?

- Like what do you
mean like what?

Like what you do.

Like make a-- a big event out
of it, have cameras there,

and celebrities.

Like what-- I'm tired of
the obscurity, all right?

I'm tired of the same few souls
who meet in musty second floor

meeting rooms--

all of them poets, all of
them academic smartasses

who don't make money and
who don't meet women.

They're all just like me.

And I'm sick of them.

I want some action.

- After considering
all of the testimony

and all of the evidence, one
thing that I can safely say

is that this is not a case
that can be resolved easily

or painlessly.

Possibly, it's a case that
can't be resolved at all.

That notwithstanding, for our
purposes, resolve that we must,

I'm not prepared to rule
on Miss Farrell's motives

nor is it appropriate, I think,
that I do so because only

she knows what's in her heart.

I will admit to
having a great concern

for the welfare of Nat Pincus.

Nonetheless, the evidence
is far from conclusive

that his decisions are
not reasonable ones,

nor is it conclusive that
he is being taken advantage

of, if that is in fact
what someone close to him

is trying to do.

That said, I find the evidence
insufficient to declare

Mr. Pincus incompetent to
manage his own affairs.

However, should his
condition worsen,

I will entertain a new motion.

In the meantime, the
motion is denied.

- Congratulations, Nat.

- Love you.

- Dad.

I'm, uh, sorry for putting
you through all of this.

- Tell her.

- It's OK.

- (SINGING) Deck the hall
with boughs of holly.

Fa, la, la, la, la, la, la--

- Well, merry
Christmas, Jonathan.

- season to be jolly.

- Uh-uh, uh-uh.

Move along, Douglas.

- I loved your
reading yesterday.

- Really?

What was it that you loved?

Me reading Allen Ginsberg or
me wearing what I was wearing?

- [chuckles] It was both.

- [chuckles]

- Excuse me.

- Don't lie to me now, Douglas.

- Mamie, it so
happens I love poetry.

- Do you?

- "Ship me somewhere east
of Suez, where the best is

like the worst, where there
aren't no Ten Commandments,

and a man can raise a thirst."

- "On the road to Mandalay,
where the flyin-fishes play

and the dawn comes
up like thunder,

outer China, across the Bay."

- You like Kipling.

- [exhales] I love Kipling.

- "For they're done
with Danny Deever,

you can hear the quickstep
play, the regiments in column.

And they're marching us away.

Ho!

The recruits are shaking.

And they'll want their
beer today after hanging

Danny Deever in the morning."

[laughs]

- Oh.

- No one loves Kipling
more than I do.

[laughter]

- Aren't you coming
to the party?

- Yeah, I'm going to
finish this up first.

I'll be right down.

- You know that poetry
thing I went to yesterday?

- Mm-hmm.

- You will never believe what
I dug up when I came home.

- What?

- I dug up a notebook of
poetry that I wrote when I was

a sophomore at Mount Holyoke.

- You're kidding.

- That I would actually have sat
down and written some of these,

is truly hard to imagine.

- I bet it is.

- Listen to this.

I want to give you an idea of
my state of mind at the time.

Oh, rain, oh, driving,
relentless, unconflicted rain,

everything I look at
is gray and still--

all except for a
ripe green pear.

Hi, little cat.

What sets me apart from you?

It must be that I'm sad.

- Wooh.

- What do you mean?

- I mean--

I mean, you're right.

It's pretty bad.

[laughs] Hi, little cat.

- I don't remember saying that
I thought it was bad, Stuart.

- You did.

I thought-- when you came
in, the whole point of it

was that it was bad.

I thought that was
the whole point.

- Forget it.

I should realize that
there are some things

I can't trust you with.

Obviously, my innermost thoughts
are at the top of the list.

- (SINGING) Sleigh bells
ring, are you listening?

- I have to tell you, Daniel.

I think that young woman
architect did a superb job.

- You should tell her, Leland.
- Oh, I will.

Is she here?
- She couldn't make it.

- Leland, Daniel.
- How'd it go?

- We're in all
respects successful.

- Great.
- Congratulations.

- Thank you.

I'd like you to meet Nat
Pincus and Morgan Farrell.

Leland McKenzie
and Daniel Morales.

- How do you do?
- Hi.

- Stewie, I want you
to meet Nat Pincus.

This is my cousin and
colleague, Stuart Markowitz.

- Pincus.
- Pleasure.

So there are two Jews
who work here, huh?

- You know, I saw you many
years ago at the Eden Roc Hotel

in Miami Beach.
- Really?

- Yeah?

- What was I doing there?

- You were performing.

- Oh, I thought I was loitering.

[laughter]

- No, you were very
funny actually.

- Thank you.

- Can I get you something?

- Uh, just a-- a
cold drink, dear.

- I'll make you a plate.

Excuse me.

- Play your cards right--

- Do you, uh, know much
about the direct mail game?

- Did I hear you
say direct mail?

- Yes, sir, you did.

- Bobby Del Giotto.

I built an entire
business on direct mail.

- Dave Meyer.

You know much about
vertical markets?

- No, but I'd like
to have you tell me.

- Freshen up his
punch, would you, son?

- So you're asking me what
I'm doing for New Year's Eve?

- Yeah, I'm asking.

- Isn't it a little late to be,
you know, looking for a date?

- [laughs] No-- no, I'm
thinking of having a party.

I'm going to have
some friends over

and have a little champagne,
some dancing on the patio.

- Oh.

- So are you interested?

- Yeah, maybe.

- Good.

- Uh, Jonathan, there's a client
or somebody looking for you.

- Oh!

Gee, gee. so I'll call you--
- All right.

- about the details.
- All right.

- All right.

- You haven't seen
Ann through here?

- Yeah, I think
she went that way.

- Yeah?
- Yeah.

- Thanks.

Hi.

- Hi.

Hello, Denise.

- Hey.

- I wanted to say
something to you.

- All right.

- Religious faith is
a very personal thing.

I know that.

And if I made you uncomfortable
or somehow suggested

that I was a better
person than you,

I want to apologize for that.

The last thing I wanted
to do was to judge you.

- [chuckles] Yeah, maybe I did
make too big of a deal of it.

I guess I jumped to the
wrong conclusion, huh?

- I, um, got you a
Christmas present.

- Really?

You didn't have to do that.

- And I hope you will take it in
the spirit in which it's given.

- Oh, should I open it now?

I mean, we're not going to
be spending Christmas morning

together so--
- Sure.

- Yeah?

All right.

I love getting presents.

- (SINGING) And
a happy New Year.

We wish you a merry Christmas.

- [exhales] Bible.

- I didn't know whether
or not you had one.

And-- and I wanted
to give you one.

- It's beautiful.

Thank you.

- Merry Christmas.

- Merry Christmas to you.

- What do you think
of the renovation?

- Oh, I love it.

I think it's great.

- My office is next.

- Yeah.

- (SINGING) Let Earth
receive her king.

- OK.

- OK?

- Let's talk in here.

- (SINGING) And heaven
and nature sing.

And heaven and nature sing.

- You want to be her father?

- Yes.

- OK.

- Really?

- You left me, Tommy.

And I was hurt.

I was angry.

I thought that if
David adopted Casey,

it would somehow change the
way she came into the world.

I can't do that.

I can't change the
fact that I came to you

and asked you to
father my child.

- I don't know what to say.

But I can promise you I will
never walk away from her again.

Merry Christmas.

Merry Christmas, Roxanne.

- Merry Christmas.

- A guy goes into a
bar, orders a scotch.

He says, don't
tell me what kind.

Bartender pours, takes a sip.

He said, Dewar's.

He says, give me another brand.

Bartender pours.

He says--

- Cutty Sark.

- Dear, are we doing a two?

- Sorry.

[laughter]

- Bartender is
getting sick of this,

goes outside, comes back
with a plain bottle, pours.

Guy takes the drink.

He says, my god, this is urine.

He says, yeah.

But whose?

[laughter]

- That's good.

That's good.

- OK.

Guy's bragging about
his hearing aid,

says, this is the greatest
hearing aid you can buy.

I spent $1,500 on
this hearing aid.

Friend says to him--

[mumbling] he says to him, uh--

[sighs] what-- what kind is it?

He says half past 4:00.

[laughter]

See, only Henny
could do that joke.

- It's Henny's joke, honey.

- Guy goes home to
his wife, and he

finds in his bed his partner.

[sighs] The, uh, guy
goes into the kitchen.

And he says-- goes into
the kitchen, and he, uh--

the wife says-- she says--

- Can I finish it, honey?

Come on, let me finish it, OK?

So the wife says, um,
what are you doing

standing here drinking coffee?

And she says, what
about your partner?

And he says, let him
get his own coffee.

[quiet laughter]

Are you ready to go, Nat?

- (WHISPERING) Yeah, let's go.

- Bye, everybody.

- Bye.

- Happy holidays.

- Thank you.

- (SINGING) Gloria
in excelsis Deo.

Gloria in excelsis Deo.

[theme music]

[music playing]