All language subtitles for American Gods 2x03 - Muninn

Mr. World wants to know why

Mr. Wednesday would bring
a nobody into his tribe.

I'm just a bodyguard.

There's a devil in the French
Quarter of New Orleans.

None better with the spice
of life than the old Baron.

I need the eyes of Argus
on my side to see my enemies.

Make the connection for me.

Ifrit, Grimnir needs you
at the Corn Palace.

Ask for Old Iktomi.

To what end?

Gungnir.

Find Media.

Oh, Media!

Come on. Mr. World wants you.

We will meet in your reincarnation.

Be proud, Betty.

Synced and corrected by -robtor-
www.addic7ed.com

Betty the Barbarian,

a Berserker!

Be proud!

Be proud!

Valhalla!

Betty the Barbarian.

A Berserker!

Shadow!

Shadow!

Shadow!

Laura!

Laura!

Ah, Mrs. Moon.

Fuck.

Did we sit on a wall?

Did we have a great fall?

Shadow's here somewhere.
We have to find him.

Sweeney, pick up the arms
and the talkie bits, would you?

Laura!

Don't do this.

I've always been a leg man myself, Laura.

- Don't help him.
- Pipe down!

Believe it or not, I'm helping you.

C'mon! Put her in the trunk!

Motherfucker!

I trusted you.

Fucking vultures!

Welcome back, Betty.

Shadow! Shadow!

- You sure you wanna leave the oaf?
- Shadow!

Am I the only one
that has faith in Shadow?

My faith is waning.

The quickest way for Shadow
to get where he's going

- is sometimes the longest.
- Motherfucker!

Cairo! Cairo!

Cairo...

Cairo.

Egyptian.

Egyptian?

No more.

What's the news, Muninn?

Did you find our boy?

Excellent.

Okay. You can fuck off now.

Right arm.

Five pounds, two ounces.

Loss of one ounce to necrosis
plus a quarter ounce of maggots

Nature's way of saying
you've overstayed your welcome.

You just gonna lie there,

let nature have her way with you?

Hey!

Snap out of it, ya fuckin' cunt!

- Told you not to call me that.
- Ah.

There she is.

Are you eating me?

The funerary arts
we practice are ancient.

The deceased don't generally
witness them.

Ugh.

You've changed
since I last worked on you.

The first time we met,
you didn't believe in anything.

But now... well...

It's definitely something.

I believe in Shadow.

And as soon as you've
got me all stitched up,

I'm gonna do

what the Cowardly Lion over there

wouldn't let me do before,
and I'm gonna save him.

Coward?

I saved you.

I'm dead, Coward.

Well, you're welcome
for picking up all your gory

little fuckin' pieces up off the road!

I wonder how much longer
I'm gonna be fixable.

I mean, how long until all this
is just... maggots?

Can you stop chewing, please?

God! Just finish me up!

And can ya hurry it up, Ibis?

Mrs. Moon and I have a date with Argus.

That old dog?

No, not Odysseus's mutt.

The man with all the eyes.
Argus Panoptes.

- Argus?
- Mm.

To what end?

Sorry, why should I help you?

Well, those stitches
ain't gonna last forever.

I give it another week.

My old friend
Argus can recharge your coin.

Stop the rot.

He's lyin' to ya.

Argus is nothing but a standard-issue

peeping fuckin' Tom.

I'm going to New Orleans, dead wife.

I suggest you come with me.

I can get you what you actually need.

Your man works for me, Mrs. Moon.

Mark my words.

You're gonna need the Baron, dead wife.

I'll see you in New Orleans.

Let's go, Mr. Wednesday. Thank you.

You're a bigger fool
than I thought you were!

If you still trust him after...

Keep an eye out for her dearly beloved.

A little bird told me
Shadow's on his way.

Fuck.

Oh-ho.

Oh, this is heavenly.

And a beautiful angel too.

My goodness, it is so humid out there.

Y'all should get a water.
It's 69 cents plus tax,

but it ain't gonna help
with the humidity.

Perfect. And please ignore this.

I went hiking, I may have fallen over.

It's a little bit embarrassing.

Um, I only have a 20 on me.
You got enough singles?

Oh, yeah, no problem.

Great, thanks.

So, the water and the map
together is $7.02.

Great.

Oh, uh...

I may have

something a little bit smaller.

'Cause, no, I-I don't wanna...

I don't wanna get all your change there.

So, if I give you three singles,

then you can just give me my 20 back.

And I'll take a beautiful smile.

I'll tell you what.

My two kids wiped that smile
off my face a long time ago.

- No.
- Hey.

That's not right.

He never paid you for that pretty smile.

He don't owe me for that.

Then you don't mind if I take it.

Give me 20 on Pump 2.

Well, that's not
up to me. It's his money.

Trust me. He doesn't mind.

Well, do you two know each other?

Oh, I know him.

Ah, there you go.

Ah... thank you. Thank you.

Hey.

So, uh... how far is that
20 gonna take me?

From where you were standing
to where you are now.

Look, I... I just need to get to Cairo.

It's Cay-row.

Cay-Cay-row?

You homeless or something?

Ah, heh, no, no, no. It's just...

I was just hiking and, and I,
I just, I slipped on this rock.

I busted my ass. Ended up
just tearing all down here.

You're a liar.

Hey, can...

What's that about?

Evidence. Case you turn
into a psycho down the road.

Get in.

Why Argus?

Well, even before her union to Zeus,

Hera, Goddess of marriage and childbirth,

ruled over the heavens and the Earth.

The wisdom of Zeus is best exemplified

in the fear he had of his sister,

for she was also his wife.

They fought frequently

over his many extramarital affairs

and illegitimate children,
but in the end,

all Gods fall victim
to their thirst for worship.

The advantage of love at first sight...

...is it doesn't require a second look.

Zeus saw the River God's
beautiful daughter Io,

and fell madly in love.

He consummated his desires

without any consideration
of the consequences.

Displeased with Zeus's infidelity,

Hera turned Io into a cow
and summoned her servant Argus

to keep the heifer away from her husband.

Frustrated by his own desires,

Zeus sent Hermes to deliver
a fatal message to Argus.

The death of the All-Seeing One
angered the Queen of Goddesses.

In an act of vengeance,

she channeled her will
and Argus was reborn,

in America, as the God of Surveillance.

But as his believers waned,
so did his sight.

Only his memories remain intact

An alliance with the New Gods
seems imminent.

This was an hour ago.

He was heading south
into Illinois, of all places,

with an unidentified female
before we lost connection.

I've got nine more on the way.

They'll notify me

as soon as they relocate
Wednesday's little minion.

And the drone that went down?

I can't confirm the exact location.

The GPS logs were corrupted.

If the network had been upgraded...

First of all,

fuck you.

Second, I told Argus to upgrade
this hub eons ago.

I am not some ant-fucking micromanager.

Have you heard of the...

...broken-window theory?

A broken window in a nice neighborhood...

...signals to all who see it
that the norms have slipped.

Your broken window
has signaled to every God

that has not chosen a side

that my house is not in order.

Get your man in line!

You do not want me to solve this.

Right.

- You text them.
- You will go to him in person.

- Why?
- Tradition!

We build the new world

on top of the ruins of the old.

Download complete.

Compiling.

Run program.

Media.

Oh, that's just so old.

This here is New.

New Media.

Ah, and that's a...

...Happy Birthday to me.

So, what's our play, boys?

Argus.

Ah, fuck, yes!

The man with the fiber optics!

You know, that's my jam.

- Good.
- Ah.

Uh...

How the fuck is that an upgrade?

What is this place again?

Oh, ask the local tinfoil-hat brigade.

They'll tell you it's the secret HQ for

the Deep State, the Illuminati,

the men in black.

Ask the local council,
city hall, they'll tell you,

"Ah, it's just a warehouse
full of computers."

What's the truth?

Truth is Argus,

and the truth doesn't care
which version you prefer.

The truth is just information.

And information will win the war
for you, if you let it.

- I'm not in a war.
- Oh, you are

if you wanna get that heart ticking.

Come on!

We're taking the scenic route.

Interesting choice.

Old school.

The fuck are we?

We're in a field.

Well, memory of a field.

Is he dead?

Oh, deader than you.

What did you come back for, anyway?

Who is he?

That's an old version of Argus,

a cast-off husk

after he changed into something else.

Now, you revenants,

and that's what you are, my dear,

you tend to be single use.

You come back to do the one thing,

and then slip back off the mortal coil.

So, what's your mission?

You know what my mission is:

Shadow.

Oh, so, marriage, kids,

summer house? I mean,
how do you see this ending?

- I don't know.
- You don't know.

So, you're working on faith, huh?

Well, I definitely wouldn't use
that word, but...

You, uh, came back from the dead,

but you're not even curious why?

Well, I see a golden beam
of light wherever he is,

so from where I'm sitting
it's pretty cut and dry.

Oh.

Do you, uh...

Do you see one here?

No.

Interesting.

Shadow made my heart beat again.

He kissed me and my dead
fucking heart beat.

That has to count for something.

Uh-huh. In death as in life,
it's all about Laura Moon.

You saw a light. Your heart beats.

What about Shadow?
What about his heart, huh?

He's got a nice stretch of road
ahead of him now.

He doesn't want
to spend it with a corpse.

You really think you can compete
with what I can show him?

Yeah, I do actually.

You were beautiful,

and kind,

and your lover will remember you forever.

Odin thanks you personally for this gift.

Jesus Christ.

Change requires sacrifice.

You coming?

I didn't picture
the Corn Palace like this.

In my head it was a lot more yellow.

Like corn.

Roadside attractions
are all about the green.

Alright, guys,

you've been waitin' all night for this.

Welcome to the stage
the beautiful Tamara!

Is Old Iktomi a Jinn like you?

Iktomi is a shapeshifter
and a spider like Mr. Nancy.

He controls humans like puppets

so, whatever you do,
do not look him in the eyes.

How did he get Gungnir?

Trickster Gods always seem to find a way.

Ifrit.

You smell of sex with humans.

Well, maybe that's because
I like to fuck humans!

- How are you, my friend?
- I'm good, my friend.

Iktomi will grant Votan's request,

but expects a favor in return.

Follow me.

I was listening to this audiobook

before you bought a ticket to ride.

You ever hear of the Crow Nation warrior

named Finds Them and Kills Them?

No, but he sounds very efficient.

He was different.

Like me: two-spirited.

You're human, right?

You're not some buffalo queen,

pulling coins outta hoards,
turn into fucking spiders?

Not yet.

Although, if this were back in the day,

I would've been godlike.

Why?

Two spirits in one body,

both masculine and feminine.

It was considered a gift
from the Creator.

Yeah, well, Gods only give gifts

when they get something in return.

Okay.

The only gift my people ever got

was a cozy smallpox blanket and genocide.

Fuckin' hell!

Oh!

Have you never been in a library?

I love libraries.

I miss libraries. This is not a library.

Oh, this is a library.

This is a memory of a library.

Is that the same guy from the field?

Oh, don't feel sorry for him.
He's moved on.

So, the game is that we follow
the trail of dead bodies

until we get to the most recent
version of your friend Argus?

Smart dead girl.

I can see what Shadow saw in you.

You don't know the first thing about me.

Oh, I know everything about you.

Everything.

You say you miss libraries.

Remember that book you kept
and said it was lost?

When you were 10, you took it home,

your dad got drunk, as usual,
spilled some booze on it.

It stunk and stained so bad you
were ashamed to take it back.

What was the title of it?

Tiger Eyes. Judy Blume.

And have you visited a library since?

It's a cool party trick.

You know a story about me.
You don't know me.

You know, your friend isn't exactly

rolling out the red carpet for us.

He... is not expecting us.

I want it to be a surprise.

You know you don't want
Shadow, don't you?

Please, tell me more about what I want.

You want to feel.

You want that rush of blood to the head

when you stand up too fast.

Fuck too hard.
Kill those guys on the train.

You gotta get that ticker
ticking, by hook or by crook.

Shadow is frightened
of that girl, isn't he?

I have no idea what you're talking about.

You know exactly what I'm talking about.

You are not the girl he fell
in love with anymore.

Are you?

You know, that's really
none of your business.

So, why don't you just tell me

how the fuck we can get out of here?

Well, that is obvious, huh?

Sacrifice.

Okay, well, this guy's already dead.

So, are there rats or something?

What's the worst thing
you can do to a book?

Um...

Ignore it?

This is a memory of the Great
Library of Alexandria.

It contained a copy
of every book ever written.

You could spend a lifetime
in here and many did.

Until Caesar came to town.

He laid siege to the city.

When he was backed into a corner,

he set fire to his own ships.

His own men.

They died looking up to as much
of the sky as they could see

through the smoke and the flames.

Some must have lasted long enough

to see the fire roll up
to the Great Library.

Oh, that was sacrifice.

Burn, baby, burn.

You hungry?

Yeah. I could eat.

Tell Votan not to forget
who his friends are

when this is over.

That motherfucker has no friends.

Iktomi is here.

Whoa.

This place is definitely about the green.

You've brought me a sacrifice?

Votan offers no worship.

I'm Salim.

Can I offer you drink or smoke?

Come now.

Your tricks, your potions.

They do not work on me. Remember?

When the time comes,

Votan must pay homage.

_

Iktomi.

Gungnir's an instrument of death.

Will Thoth allow it?

That...

...my very, very, very old friend,

is not your motherfucking concern.

He's gonna need this too.

Leave me.

Choukrane.

Iktomi.

You a fan of catfish?

Uh, fish is fish in my book.

Yeah, I'm pretty sure not
all sushi was created equal.

I will take your word for it.

So, what's in Cairo?

I gotta find the Egyptians?

The Egyptians in Cairo?

I actually know a place.

It's been there forever.

I guess sleeping with the dead

is better than sleeping with the fishes.

Yeah, well...

What's her name?

Who?

You know who.

Laura.

Mmm.

Yeah, I know a few Lauras.

Every one of them's
been a pain in my ass.

Well, this Laura's dead, but...

I'm just gonna let that
sink in for a minute.

Okay, I got four cats,
two shakes, two fries!

Just a hot second, new girl.

We need a plan of attack.

Mm. Man with a plan.

Love it.

- I'm in charge.
- I'll sing backup.

Got it! #NotMe, #You!

Cool.

Follow my lead.

These Old Gods need special handling.

It is kinda weird that he sent
us both, though, isn't it?

I mean, we're basically...

...redundant.

Hm?

We're different enough.

Different audiences, for sure.

What I really need...

Bandwidth.

You think you could hook me up?

Dude! You all right?

So, you're going all the way
to New Orleans, then?

Yeah, we're bringing
our message there tonight.

We are just so happy to have you.

Have you accepted Jesus Christ
as your Lord and Savior?

Fuck...

I'm really trying

to see things from your perspective.

Then I remembered that
you're literally fucking blind

so I might have
to spell this out for you.

May I remind you, one word from me

and you go back to trolling
the Dark Web on IRC bots

and GeoCities pages.

The ingratitude.

It hurts me.

How many other Gods would love the access

that I've given to Mr. World?

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

That you've given me, Argus.

Me! You're tech, okay?

And tech is my bitch, okay?

That makes you my fucking bitch, okay?

I need you to do something I can't.

- I need you to kill him.
- What?

He's been playin' both sides,

and I need to get him off the field.

Go for the tattoo on the neck.
That's where the magic is.

He dies, your coin recharges.

Live to see the future with Shadow

that you've put so much
unearned faith in.

You're a fucking liar.

I wanna go home now.

All right.

Don't believe me.

But you're still gonna need
a sacrifice to get outta here.

I am not like Shadow.
I see right through you.

I know you're a fucking fraud.

Oh, can't con a con, is that it?

Well, I did, and you were
such an easy mark, hmm?

You sleepwalked through
your life while you had one,

then I had you killed.

And now you're sleepwalking
through your death.

It's my hand up your skirt, puppet.

Because for all that gaga-goo-goo

about coming back for love,

I know what makes you tick and
isn't our dearly beloved Shadow.

It's self-interest,
like any other mere mortal.

I'm just making sure that...

...what I'm having you do is
what is right for Laura McCabe.

Entropy leads logically to disorder.

All systems evolve towards chaos.

Even alliances with Gods.

Listen to me, you cosmically
inconsequential sack of shit...

Let me handle this.

Hi, big guy.

Nice to meet you.

I don't think we realized how...

big,

how powerful your network really is.

Now that I'm here, it occurs
to me that we could,

you know,

do something on our own.

Forget Mr. World.

You're someone who can handle my demands.

What the fuck, Media?

You would join me?

Leave Mr. World?

I have millions of subscribers.

Thousands of likes and shares per minute.

Everyone watches me, but I need
someone who can watch them back

We were made for each other.

Connect.

Merge. Be me.

See the world through
the eyes of everyone

who has ever watched me.

Together, we can usher in the new wave

of synergistic, expansive...

...marketing opportunities.

I can see.

Um, guys...

Never mind.

Your loss,

my gain, you fucking nerd.

I wasn't done.

Come on.

Wednesday's move, am I right?

Tell the old cunt he's fucking welcome.

Hey, it's done. You can come out.

Coming!

Nothing's happening.

You are so impatient!

Who the fuck were those people?

World's people.

I told you he'd gone
over to the other side.

Wednesday.

Well, I am so sorry,
Argus, my old friend.

This war business, nothing personal.

But I'm sure you'll come back somehow.

And just remember when you do,
which side you're on.

Well, lookie here.

I guess it wasn't
all about Shadow, after all.

Now, that should hold the rot for a while

and that makes us square. So...

Ciao, baby.

I'm, I'm coming with you.

Why?

- Shadow.
- No, no, no.

You can't come back, not after
everything you've been through.

No, no, no, no, no.

Your dead little heartbeat and Shadow

had fuck all to do with it!

And what a mercy that is, huh?

He doesn't love the girl
that wants to be alive

and will kill to get what she wants.

No, he loved the girl

that tried to off herself with bug spray.

And that girl...

...well, she doesn't exist
anymore, does she?

Oh, I just love a happy ending.

Goodbye and good luck,
Miss Laura McCabe Moon.

It's funny.

A lot of my dreams are nightmares.

Buffalos and skulls and...

...all kinds of weird shit.

I just don't understand.

Well, good luck with that.

Yeah.

I don't want luck.

I want peace.

My father was a full-blood Cherokee,

and he called me a half-breed.

My mother raised me
with the Bible by her side.

There was no peace for me.

Not in their worlds.

But I found my home
in the stories of my ancestors.

Keep searching...

...or give up.

Hey. I never did catch your name.

I'm Shadow Moon.

Sam Black Crow.

Friends of yours?

Shadow Moon.

Well, look at you.

Trial and tribulation make you stronger,

but you look like
you have been through it.

So, this is how it's gonna go.

I'm gonna ask you some questions.

And you're gonna give me some answers.

Revelations come when ready,
not when requested.

Fine.

Then just tell me why.

Can you just,

just tell me why these sadistic
motherfuckers are after me?

Oh, could be your face,
could be your shoes. Who knows?

All I know is that, in the morning,

you're gonna wake up
and wanna seize the day.

No, Shadow, listen. Listen to me.

If you don't wake up in the morning

feeling like a million bucks,

you can take Betty
and leave, with my blessing.

Eh?

We have a compact?

Come on!

Come on!