Original subtitles

I'm worried.

What?

Too short?

About Lucy coming over.

Have we done the right thing inviting

Stella's mad ex around?

It just feels a bit extreme.

Shouldn't we have explainedthings to Stella first?

Eased her in a bit?

What's he saying?

Bull fighter.

Why are you wearing sunglasses?

I'm hungover.

Look, it's the first day as a manager,

and I'm going to be breathingZambuka over everyone.

In a shit outfit.

Poor stout.

She's out there now, innocentlytucking into her corn flakes.

No idea that the doorbellis about to ring, and--

No.

I mean, surely there's another way

to lift the spell without bringing

Lucy back into our lives.

Is there any chance thatyou could help me out, please.

This is a DEFCON 1 clothing crisis.

No.

This is the right thing.

Yeah, Stella needs to move on,so she can fall in love again.

And if the only way she can dothat is to confront her past,

then we have to lift this memory spell.

We're ready for Lucy, aren't we?

I said, we're ready for her, aren't we?

Yes.

Course we are.

Bring it on!

You look shit-hot.

Christ, it's her.

Jude, post for you.

That hangover cure done yet?

Where are you off to?

Look, it's time to step upand take this job seriously.

I have to accept that I'm not going to be

a fashion designer anymore.

I'm a manager.

You know, loads of peoplewould love to be managers.

Managers are--.

What about being creative?

I'm in charge of thewindows, Blay, that's creative.

Welcome to adulthood, my friend.

All right, hold your nose.

Knock it back.

Shit, Grace.

You're good.

Watch out, lords.

There's a new boss in town.

I'm going to staple these to her hand

if she forgets them again.

First rule of management,a person or organization--

Stells, you dick.

It's me!

Hi, Lucy.

Who is she?

Sorry for the shambles, girls.

I've been through an all nighter.

I'm feelings a tad--

You'd better come in.

I was in Ibiza.

I was in Stonehenge.

I was in Betty's Tirem Haregut.

Guess who chose that?

It'll all come back to you in a minute.

We went out with each other.

It was the real deal, bambino.

The thing is--

Can we explain to her, please?

You and Lucy went out witheach other five years ago.

Shut up.

We met on paganliving.com.

- She's a witch.- Babes.

But I'm not in the coven at themoment, though, so if you're

planning on doing anotherdisappearing act, let us know,

Hannibal.

Please don't call me Hannibal.

Everything was going fine, Stell.

Everything was not going fine.

Hello, if I just travel back into a time machine

where none of you had to let me bloody speak,

everything was going fine.

We did argue, but who doesn't argue.

It was a bit fiery, Stell, butthat's why you loved me, babe.

I did not love you.

Yes Yes, you did.

But then we had this big row, then we split up.

And then this lot suggestedthat you do a memory

spell to forget about me.

Stella, it was your idea.

Allegedly.

Excuse me, sick burp.

You were in pieces all thetime when you were with her.

It was horrible.

We think this is why you'renot connecting with anyone.

You can't fall in love againuntil you remember Lucy

and get over her properly.

Can I get someone into the stock room

to sort out that delivery, please?

Can you not see what I'm going through here?

What's happened?

Miles just e-mailed.

Duncan's got him a job in New York.

He's left already.

Aw, sorry.

I might have to go home.

No, you can't go home, we're short-staffed.

Why are being such a bitch?

I am literally having a break down here.

I'm manager now.

I've got responsibilities.

Look, 20 unanswerede-mails from head office.

I can't afford to be a slacker anymore.

O- M-F-G. Look at the color of those

reams/ I think I've just diedand gone to fashion heaven.

Rodger Simons, the new art-fenteterrible of the fashion world,

is blowing everybody out ofthe world with his designs.

Fuck me.

I don't think so, darling.

Not unless my gaydar isseriously out of batteries.

I went to school with him.

Well, he was a dick.

He was the uncoolest, fattest kid in the--

no way.

Yes way, girlfriend.

He didn't even take art as an option.

I want to vomit.

I can't look.

Read the e-mail.

He's designing a cultural range for us.

He chose us.

He didn't want it to get out, apparently.

It's only creatives that havebeen kept in the loop so far.

Creatives?

Right.

Brilliant.

You need to share a special,truthful memory with Lucy

in order to lift the switch.

You know, something youexperienced together, which,

you know, meant something.

My sweet spirit.

I know, contortionist, Isn't she?

There must be something else.

Anything?

Hang on.

Where did you get your necklace from?

Um.

Photo?

No. I can't remember.

Glastonbury, 2007.

Ring any bells?

We nearly got married in the inflatable church.

Then you took a knock and we had to carry you

to first aid in a wheelbarrow.

Liabilities, bloody always.

Stella, open the door.

Why haven't you gone?

I want to talk to you.

Well, I don't want to talk to you.

I know you remember thatStell lived to die so rich.

No, It didn't.

Piss off.

Open the door.

Stell.

Stelly Jelly Belly.

What have I said about calling me that.

Hello, sweetheart.

Hello?

I'm not changing my mind.

Do we intervene?

This is good.

This is what needs to happen.

One last showdown, then it'sover and Stella can move on.

But can we handle oneof their showdowns though?

Don't worry, you'll be fine.

You can't leave me on my own with them.

I have to go out, Ineed to find a proper job.

Switch me if it goes tits up.

What do you need from your memories?

It's trivializing-- No!

This is typical of you.

Sorry, is it Beth?

My mistake.

You're the double of a womanI interviewed last week.

Did she get it?

Sorry?

Did she get the job?

She wasn't right in the end.

We're looking for a maverick, someone

with dynamism, you know, who'sreally up for a challenge,

really ballsy.

I'm looking for a job.

Why don't we call the middleman and you interview me now?

How about that for ballsy?

The thing is it-- it might not be for you.

Hit me with it.

OK.

I work for a company calledTestsure Security Limited.

We're employed by a number of corporations

to test the efficiency oftheir security systems,

check everything's working as it should.

This position is for someoneto target security guards,

and ensure they're up to scratch.

A new operative would visit designated stores

and attempt to elicit goods.

You're paying someone to shoplift?

To put it crudely, yeah, we are.

If you're successful, thenwe know the security's lacks

and we return the goods with a full report.

If you get caught you simply present the store

with this, which verifies that you're

working on behalf of Testsure.

So I'd be like an undercover agent.

Kind of.

This is my dream job.

I didn't even know it existed.

It's like the jigsaw pieces ofmy life are falling into place.

Now, what about experience?

Boots, every Saturday when I was 15.

Eyeliners, now vanished the lot.

All that we can mix.

Swapped all the color bottles in one go once.

I'm discreet, trustworthy,a team player,

and if you give me achance I'll prove myself.

Now, this type of workis completely confidential.

It totally jeopardizes our business

if we discuss it with anyone.

OK, look, I like you.

What about a trial?

See how you get on.

Thank you, Julian.

Welcome to Testsure, Hannah.

Jealousy is a tiger thattears not only its prey,

but also its own raging heart.

Can you be happy for him?

He struggled academically,and now he's hit the big time.

It's inspirational.

No, I struggled academically,where did that get me?

Just because I wasn't some worldcollector to get to the top.

You know, he spent his work experiencing Paris.

I was in a jam factory in Borehamwood.

Excuse me, are you the manager?

Look, I bought this last week, and then

I've only worn it once, and already

the seam started to come away.

What do you expect?

It was 25 quid.

What are you doing?

Lucy came over.

The switch has been lifted.

Any breakages?

Yeah, it's been fairly quiet.

You're early.

I hate my stupid shit job.

You've got to do something.

I know I said I was going togrow up, and I am, I swear,

but please can we charm my portfolio?

I don't want to manage one of the shops,

I want to design for them.

Has she always been that impossible?

Yup.

Fancy doing a quick switch,take your mind off it?

I'm not really in the right head space, Jude.

Good news and bad news.

Good news, got a job. - Brilliant.

Bad news is, if I tell you what

it is I'll have to kill you.

This is the one I've been waiting for.

Right.

She's been gone an hour, and she's

landed the job of her dreams.

I've been designing foryears, I deserve some help.

Spirit please, let those in charge

recognize this talent large.

All she needs is--

Stella.

Just keep going.

All she needs is one big break.

Zeal she can no longer fake.

OK.

So you know the drill.

Hysterical screaming, a couple long silences,

and I am straight in there.

All right, portfolio.

TIme to work your magic.

Do you think you could take over in a bit?

Sorry, got to start while your hand's hot.

Come on, that's notfair, where are you going?

I told you, no questions.

Everything is coming back.

Don't you worry.

And wiping me from your memory

doesn't trivialize it.

No.

Thank you very much. Typical.

You haven't seen me in five years.

I'll take over again in a bit.

Only want a little break to go to the toilet.

Hey.

Hey.

Well, you just missed her.

If you run you'llprobably catch her there.

No.I'm not here to see Jude.

Just came to get my guitar.

Right.

Great.

Is that OK then, if I come in and get it?

My God, yes.

Come and get it.

Your guitar.

Operation Testsure, May 20th, 2012.

Arrived at destination.

Target in sight, I'm going in.

I don't even know what you're still doing here.

Yes, I remember everything.Job done.

Thank you.

Now can you go, so I can get on with my life.

Can you though, Stell?

Can you seriously get onwith your life without me?

So I'm nothing to you anymore?

I'm just bloody dead to you?

Throw me a bone, Stella.

OK.

So we had some good times.

At last, thank you.

But they were mostly bad, Lucy.

What if I told you I changed?

Well, it's besides the point.

It's gone.

We can't go back.

We can.

We can go back to the future.

That doesn't even make sense.

The best things in life don't.

I'm not leaving from thisbed until you hear me out.

This is officially a peaceful sit-in.

Hi.

I'm here to see the creative director.

Can I take your name, please?

Yeah, the thing is shedoesn't actually know me.

I mean, I haven't actually got an appointment.

All I want is two minutes.

I brought my por--

Folio.

Yeah, if you could ask her tocome down, or I could leave it.

No unsolicited material.

Look, Wendy.

Do you really think reading my name

badge is going to impress me?

Did anything come for me?

Yes, this arrived by courier.

Excuse me, where are you going?

Hi, I'm a designer, and I wonder if you

could spare 10 seconds, please.

It's OK.

I'm good.

Could you spare the time to come

up to my office for a chat?

It has not been easy for me, Stella.

That's all I'm trying to communicate here.

I hated the thought that you wanted

to wipe me out of your head.

It was the only way I thought I

could draw a line under itfor good, just press delete

and move on.

I'm not one of yourExcel spreadsheets, Stella.

Were you?

Of course I was.

So was I. Still am.

I made a massive mistake, and I spent

every second of the pastfive years regretting it.

There's an exercize book under the bed

full of poems to prove it.

About me?

Well, some of them were political,

but yes, they were mainly about you.

I'd do anything to put things right.

It's a bit late now.

I don't think it is.

OK, everyone.

Slight change to the agenda.

As you know, since John Paul left us

we've struggled to find somebody with an equally

exciting vision.

Meet Jude.

Jude, what would you say to coming

on board as our head designer?

I'd say, yes, please.

I've got my own office,and it's bigger than my frat.

O- M-F-G. O-M-F'ing-G. I'mcocking hyperventilating.

I know.

What should I tell work?

Well, tell them they canshove their poxy manager's

job right up their--

Jude, it's the head designer's task to lead

the weekly team meetings.

Right.

OK. Um.

When does that-- ?

Fridays at 11:00.

Hi everybody.

That's right, squeeze in.

Here come some more of you.

So, how does this, um,what normally happens in--

what exactly happens in these meetings?

Because I know every company is different,

and I don't want to just storm in here and--

Can you describe your vision for next year's

spring summer arrange?

Absolutely!

Spring, summer.

I'm thinking fabrics,lots of different fabric.

Cambressini and Beretta havebeen quite popular for spring

some of the past few seasons.

Are you going to continue with those?

Or do you think you'll switch to something

heavier like, Zebulunay?

Yes.

Anything else?

Are you going to follow the trend

for swockets, warts, and moobs?

How dare you. You know what?

I'm not even going todignify that with an answer.

I think we've covered everything.

That was ace.

I wish I could play an instrument.

Are you familiar with the tambourine?

Here.

Just shake the fuck out of it.

All right, you own that tambourine!

Thank you.

Yeah, definitely.

You're ace, you are.

What?

Well, I can't hear a thing.

Not a good sign.

No.

Prolonged silences orhysterical screaming, both bad.

God!

Anyone sitting here? Great.

New girl, getting to know the mates.

Hi, I'm Jo.

I'm the intern.

Great.

How are you getting on?

I love it.

Designing is all I've ever wanted to do,

I want to be you, basically.

Can I-- Can I ask you a question?

Shoot.

How did you get here?

I mean like, what did you do before?

You're a fashion intern, and you've

never heard of Jude Thomas?

God, I am so sorry.

I'm usually really up to speed with the industry.

It's fine.

You can't know everything.

I try to keep on top of everything, but I

just don't have time anymore.

Not with all of my other work.

You have another job apart from this?

Three.

I can't afford to do it otherwise.

We haven't had this much for a while.

Well, that head office arenot going to be impressed.

This particular store is problematic.

You should go back in, so wecan file a conclusive report

and deliver our findings on it.

He won't get the sack, will he?

Hopefully, yeah.

Can't they send them on a training course?

This is business.

It's cutthroat, wheat from chaff.

You eliminate the chaff, youdon't keep watering the chaff.

What are you Hannah?

Are you wheat or chaff?

Wheat?

You're wheat.

You are wheat.

Now, get out into that field.

That was--

My God.

How did you even get your legs that far?

Really?

Stella's lay back back is over, Gracie.

Why didn't you knock?

Hysterical screaming or prolonged silences.

So what is this?

Are you two back together?

Well, we're getting--

just play it by ear.

We'll see how it goes.

Connecting again.

Yeah, well, you certainly were.

We're not going toconnect properly if we don't

give it a proper go, are we?

I am wheat. I am wheat.

I am wheat.

He won't get the sack, will he?

Hopefully, yeah.

Tell your dad.

Tell your dad.

Madam, can I see what you'reconcealing under your coat?

Thank God.

I'd thought you would never notice.

You are one shit-hot security guard.

You should be promoted or something.

I'm from Testsure.

Well done, mate.

Call the police, Gordon.

No no no, hang on, I'mwaiting for my official ID card

to come through, but thisshould be enough for now.

Security?

Never heard of them.

With five sugars.

Wicked.

Thank you.

Look, Jude, I know you're really busy,

and this is probably large,I was just wondering if--

I'm sorry. You're really busy.

It's OK.

Go on.

Can I show you my portfolio?

Of course.

Joe, these are fantastic.

Really?

Yeah, you're like properly talented.

Thank you.

Look, I don't mind working for nothing

here if it gets me to where I want to be,

but I was just wondering if there's anything

else I should be doing?

I mean, I don't have any contacts or anything,

but if you've got any advice--

I don't think there are any shortcuts.

Just got to work reallyhard and trust that you'll

We need costings doing and fabrics ordered.

Can you take care of it?

Um, If you're after a bit more responsibility,

do you want to take care of this?

You'd-- you'd, um, trust me to do that?

Of course.

Heh.

Ha Hum.

All better, Luce.

Shh.

Me and Lucy are going to Ibiza for four weeks.

Woo hoo!

Bring on the style, baby!

What about work?

Well, if Janet doesn't like it, then--

She can bloody welllump it, then, can't she?

You love your job.

Woman's tea, please, Stell.

Has anyone been around looking for me?

Like, anyone official?

I'm in serious shit. - What?

With what?

What is wrong, babe?

Lost another job?

Not a lot of changes around here, Is it?

No, she can't talk about it.

It's top secret and really important.

Hannah's going places now, Lucy.

I am, yeah.

If the door goes, I'm not in, OK?

OK.

Take it another crisis, Judy, now, then?

Yeah.

Thank you so much, that was lots of fun.

Yeah, you didn't-- um.

Thank you.

Yeah, all right.

Did Jude mention my gig tonight?

I don't know if you're around but--

A gig?

Hell yeah, we should all go.

House night out.

You're not still, agoraphobic, are you, Grace?

Never been agoraphobic.

I just-- I didn't like goingout, but, you know, I do now.

I go out all the time.

Bloody mad for it.

Cool.

I'll stick your names on the door.

Heh.

Pushing your comfort zone a bit there, Grace.

I like it.

Opposites attraction, all that.

What?

No, that's some Jude's boyfriend.

Fling.

Person.

I don't know, but um--

My mistake, stick, wrong end of.

What the hell is going on?

I've just had the supplier on the phone,

these costings are all out,and every single fabric order

is wrong.

That wasn't actually me though.

Then who was it?

Joe.

The intern.

Well, she said she could handle it, I--

Right.

How dare you assume thatyou can make an order!

Do you know how much time andmoney that you have cost me?

I--

Now get your things and get out!

Get out!

What is that?

Is it wheat?

I think I've just eaten wheat.

Yes, it's wheat.

Why?

I'm allergic.

It could lead to a fecal impaction.

Let's get you to bed, babe.

No, don't move me.

What is that imbecile doing in my house?

Stella and Lucy are back together.

And she's moved in.

A littl shindig datetonight to celebrate, Judy.

Proper party, like the good old days.

Are you sure you'll be well enough?

No, I don't think I'll be well enough,

but I don't want to let anyone down,

Hannibal, it's not my style.

I'm going to gig, actually.

In fact, it's sort of a date, so--

I know.

Grace told us.

We're all going.

No, that's not, I--

didn't--

Look at this, we're all back together

like the good old days.

Can I get a group hug about now?

OK. Crisis talks.

What do we do? - Totally.

First, though, can I have five minutes?

Why?

A bit of a majorfuck-up on the work front.

Basically I'm a major cow with no morals,

and I just don't think--

Yeah, and I've got a slight possible fugitive

situation on my hands--

You two are so selfish.

We are responsible for Stella's happiness,

and all you're bothered about it yourselves.

All right, enough miss moral high ground.

You started this and now you're shitting it

because it hasn't gone to plan.

Look, we're not responsible for Stella's

happiness.

The spell has beenlifted, and if she chooses

Lucy in the cold light ofday, we might not like it,

It's her choice.

Yeah.

I suppose.

Sorry.

What did you both want to talk about?

It's all right, I knowwhat I'm going to do now.

The less you know, the better.

I'm not bringing you down with me.

I created this mess and I will get myself out,

even if takes years to clear my name,

I will fight to the end for justice.

There'll probably be a film.

It's not going to last anyway.

Do you reckon?

Not a change.

I want to make a bloody toast to second chances.

Woo, second chances.

I don't trust her as far as I can throw her.

I don't even think she's going.

I swear she keeps giving Jerry the eye.

It's not like you to get jealous.

I'm not jealous.

I couldn't give a shit, I justdon't want her dicking Stella

around again.

So you're not really bothered about him then?

Don't know.

But he does look fit witha guitar, doesn't he?

Stell, are you sure about this?

Yeah, of course I am.

It's just, it was apretty intense relationship,

Lucy can be quite demanding for long.

If you were to have met Lucyfive years ago, she's changed.

Heh.

And anyway, you haven't got the right

to dictate how I live my life.

You've done enough of that already.

- Stell!- Yeah, a bit harsh, mate.

Well, as harsh as it was for me

spending years trying to figure out why

I couldn't have a relationship.

Not fair.

That switch was your idea.

Yeah, and we onlyagreed in the first place

because we hated seeing you so sad.

And now you hate seeing me so happy.

No.

No.

Well, then, can you just letme get on with my life, please?

You have done enough damage.

I'm so sorry.

I'll be two seconds.

Stell, um, there's been abit of a thing with my card

to the bar, could you?

Um.

I'm so sorry.

Stella's not your cash cow, Hannah.

Cash cow?

It's 15 quid. - It's fine.

Here.

We talked about this.

You promised.

Things are going to be different.

No more mothering.

Little bit of R-E-S-P-E-C-T.

Argh.

After party?

Back at ours?

Come on, everyone!

Woo hoo!

Come on, I'll lend you the money.

If I was invisible,

I'd make you miserable.

No broken promises.

I won't have none of this.

If I was invisible, I'd make you miserable.

You are the world.

If I was invisible, I'd make you miserable.

No broken promises.

I won't have none of this.

If I was invisible I'd make you miserable.

You are the one that I adore.

Just letting life go by.

We both have seen you with him.

I never held my reaction.

I'm never gonna love again.

I don't know.

Where will I be in a year?

It's hard to say.

Will I ever get another chance?

I don't know.

I'll have to start all over again.

All the things you told me,they don't mean nothing at all.

Shit.

I thought this was the bathroom.

Bit mental in there.

I thought you'd like mental.

Not all the time.

Well, this is not like Jude's room.

No.

She is messy.

Not that that's a bad thing.

It's because she's so creative.

I'm not slagging her off.

She's my best friend, you know?

I love her.

Yeah, no, of course, so do I.I meant, I don't love love her.

I don't even-- you know, she's great, fantastic.

She is, yeah.

She's amazing.

Amazing.

She's really kind and funny.

She's hilarious.

And gorgeous.

Yeah, she's--

fucking beautiful.

What are you doing with me?

All right, that's it!

Everybody out!

Party's over!

Now!

Calm down.

Calm down?

Don't tell me to calm down, you shite!

Lucy, this is crazy.

Crazy?

Do you want to see crazy?

I'll give you crazy!

Shit.

Knife drawer.

It's all right, it's only a whisk.

Could somebody help me out, please?

All right, enough is enough.Lunatic.

I hardly think you'vegot any room to criticize.

Stella, these people aren't your friends.

They're just using you.

No.

I'd button it if I were you, Mary Poppins.

They're a gang of losers.

Well, they might be losers,but they're my losers.

Now, Get the fuck out of my house!

I see, straight back tothe cover like a bloody puppet.

Nothing's changed, has it?

No, it hasn't.

Good bye, Lucy.

Everything.

Everything's better now.

It doesn't matter how'cause everything's better.

Yup.

Yup.

But you're free now, Stell.

Yeah, and we didn't even use magic.

Well, if anyone fancies a little switch now.

Yeah.

Definitely.

What's it for?

Actually it's a bit embarrassing.

It's about my new job.

Something of his.

Spirit kind, spirit wise, our friend's

been told a pack of lies.

Given an unlikely brief,turned into a common thief.

Teach this rogue a lesson fast.

Let this scam be his last.

From now until the day he dies,vanish him from telling lies.

My name is Rupert Peabody,and I'm a pathetic con-man

with an incredibly small penis.

You want to leave?

Already?

Yeah.

I'm sorry.

This is an amazingopportunity, it's just I've got

other things in the pipeline.

I'm setting up on my own.

It's a bit of a risk, but Ineed to see if it will work.

There's nothing I can sayto persuade you to stay?

I've made up my mind.

Thank you.

Also, there's, um,something I should tell you.

It was my fault, not the intern's.

I see.

She's actually brilliant.

You should look at her work.

Maybe offer her a proper paid role.

Hey.

So nice to meet you.

Did you dream of me, too?

Well, fancy that.

- You still ready? - Yeah!

Come on down!

Woo!

Haha.

Fills my heart with sunshine.

Living life on cloud nine.

You make me feel so good.

When you're around me, every day is Sunday.

A million miles from Monday.

You make me feel good.

Jude, this is the best idea you've ever had.

I love it already. Everyone's so friendly.

Fuck off, Baz, you big old twat.

He's hilarious.

Come on.

Jackie, you're a diamond.

All right, come on.

Let's get this show on the road.

Are you sure we're doing the right thing?

Shut up.

I don't know why we'venever thought of it before.

I deal with the retail side.

This is me, it's perfect.

It is.

What have you got to lose?

You can still work in the shop.

Where's the rest?

I've been up all night.

This is what you get without using magic.

It's a start.

Yeah, baby steps.

But this is the way to do it though, Jude.

The lot!

Hello.

Look who it is, thathot girl that was chatting you

up in the pub the other night.

Either you go by yourself,or we will drag you over.

Hi.

Love is definitely in the air.

Customer.

Go.