Original subtitles

[door opens]

[indistinct chatter]

[door closes]

I'm ready.

Good. Then we can get started.

This is... the Stallone.

For sexual appeal with staying power

that you don't have to worry about growing out of

or looking ridiculous in,

this is the neploose outré.

Aren't people gonna know it's a wig?

Never.

Look, it's always going to be a shock.

That's because you still think of yourself as being bald.

You see, the first thing to do

is stop thinking of yourself as bald.

That might be a little hard.

I started losing my hair when I was nineteen.

Hair replacement is a change of life, Mr. Brackman.

Some men are ready for it.

And some men are not.

That was a little extreme.

Maybe something more subtle.

If it's subtlety you're after...

try this.

We call it...

"The chairman of the board."

Oh, we can match your hair color exactly.

I just don't wanna get laughed at.

Mr. Brackman, a man of hair has...

male #1: credibility, dignity, substance.

It is the bald man who gets laughed at.

How's Grace doing, Michael?

Well, there wasn't any bone damage.

The doctor says the scar will be really small.

- How's she feeling? - She feels okay, I guess.

Where is Douglas? I wanna get this meeting started.

I saw him earlier this morning.

Well, I've got a full schedule today.

Well, I'll see what's keeping him.

Shall we get started?

[laughs]

Brackman: Shacter versus Shacter.

Becker: Our guy's not a fighter. Right now it looks like

he wants to fall to a much weaker hand.

Well, that's too bad. Can't you do something

to get his blood going a little?

Yeah, I may have just the thing.

Brackman: People versus Hersch.

Oh, I'm-- I'm sorry.

Sifuentes: Well, this is a dead bang loser if ever I saw one.

Police, with air-tight warrants,

find six sky-high marijuana plants

growing in Israel Hersch's backyard.

The guy's 80 years old.

Now, I could plead him out on a misdemeanor possession

in a minute, but this guy wants to go to trial.

Victor, I'm afraid our hands our tied on this one.

Israel Hersch's son is our client,

Jacob Hersch. Hersch builders.

One of the largest real estate developers in L.A.

Yeah, well, Hersch elder likes to smoke reefer,

[laughing] and he wants a jury trial

so that he can explain all the reasons why.

Well, the chances are that even if you lose,

the old man won't do any time.

Sifuentes: Fine. You can be the one

to tell Hersch the younger if you're wrong.

Stenheiser versus Whooton.

Um, Dr. Whooton still wants to settle...

but the insurance carrier says no,

and I can't say that I blame them,

considering how well the trial is going.

Becoming one of Golden State Casualty's gunslingers

is an enviable position to be in, Anne.

Mucho future business.

Brackman: Let's keep them happy. - That's it.

- We have a busy day today. - That's it.

[laughter]

[laughter continues]

[theme music]

[music continues]

[music continues]

[music continues]

[music continues]

[instrumental music]

Douglas.

Douglas, I have to talk to you.

You've gotta give it longer than this

before you decide it isn't working.

Before I decide what isn't working?

Your marriage. It's only been two months

since you and Sheila reconciled. Things are a little bit delicate

for you to be playing around on the side.

I'm not playing around on the side.

Douglas, come on.

Everyone knows that when a guy gets a rug,

he's got a tootsie waiting in the wings.

I hate to go against popular wisdom, Arnie,

but I assure you, there's no tootsie and there's no wings.

- Seriously? - Yes. Seriously.

So why the landscaping?

I'll tell you why.

I was standing in a video rental store

in Westwood the other night, looking at the titles,

when I overheard the clerk direct a customer

to where I was standing, by saying,

"Go over there, by the old, bald guy."

- Oh, god. - "The old bald guy?"

Brackman: I'm 41 years old, Arnie.

Pete Rose broke Ty Cobb's record

when he was older than I am.

George Blanda played professional football

for seven years beyond the age I am now.

Being bald is like wearing bifocals.

You always look like somebody's uncle.

Boy, that must be real hard on you.

Give it another few years,

I guarantee it'll be every bit as hard on you.

[chuckling] What... what are you talking about?

Your hairline.

It's only headed in one direction, and that's back.

My hair has always been thin.

I'm not talking about thin, Arnie.

I'm talking about bald.

Skinhead, chrome dome.

Take a look.

Because that's what you have to look forward to.

What are you now? 36? Thirty-seven?

I had some hair then too.

Enough to play with, at least.

First of all, I have a lot of time before this goes.

You see this? This is core hair.

It is resistant to thinning.

Second of all, by the time it does go,

assuming that it does...

they're gonna have a cure.

From what I've read, they're very,

very close to a breakthrough. Even now.

Forget it, Arnie.

When it goes, it's gone.

That's true, isn't it?

It's true.

Believe me, it's true.

[sighs] Well...

I guess the best I can hope for

is by then I'll be married.

Got a minute?

Sure. Come on in.

- Shaking? - No, not particularly.

No? Then you're made of much sterner stuff than me.

How is that?

Well, if I'd been through what you did,

I would take a little while to recover. That's all.

Being grazed by a bullet isn't a whole lot to recover from.

Passing that close to death is, though.

Guess what? We pass that close to death every day of our lives.

You take the freeway into work, Bruce?

Ride in elevators, live near a fault line?

Alright, if you're fine, you're fine.

I'm fine.

I just want you to know

if you wanna take some time off, you can.

A vacation? Oh, no, no, no, no.

I'd rather tend to the duties of the office, thank you.

Your choice.

The only time I will need off is to testify at

Van Owen: Kevin Rollins' juvenile court hearing.

I know. I'm going down there with you.

Now that's really not necessary.

If it's all the same to you, I think I'll go anyway.

The prosecution has seen fit to ridicule and belittle

Mr. Hersch's claim that his personal philosophy,

combining elements of Rastafarianism

and Hasidic Judaism require

the smoking of marijuana.

I'll concede that he is by no means

your run-of-the-mill Beverly Hills homeowner.

I'll even concede that he's an eccentric

who likes to sit by the pool,

reading scriptures and smoking pot.

But is his behavior so threatening to us

that we have to put him in jail?

That strikes me as being more than extreme.

More than inappropriate.

It strikes me as a betrayal

of one of the principles on which this country was founded,

which affords to each of us

the fundamental right to be left alone.

Now, the prosecution will ask you that you look to the law,

and this you must do.

But I ask of you...

that you look to your hearts as well.

Thank you.

Will you describe for us what happened to you

on the afternoon of February the tenth?

I was walking down the corridor

on the fourth floor of the criminal courts building,

when an individual fired at me with a handgun,

striking me in the right arm.

Can you tell us if you see that individual in this room?

I can. He's seated right over there.

Had you ever seen him prior to the day of the shooting?

Van Owen: I saw him at the Walter Buckner trial,

in which I was the prosecuting attorney, yes.

Kendal: I have no further questions, Your Honor.

Thank you, Miss Van Owen. You may step down.

Thank you.

Judge: Mr. Norman, may I have your closing remarks, please.

Just sit up, okay?

Your Honor, Kevin Rollins might be a bad boy,

but he's still a boy.

Norman: He never intended to murder Miss Van Owen.

He wanted to frighten her.

He winged her in the arm.

She looks none the worse for it.

And I think now, we have to look at...

his action for what it was,

a rite of passage.

Oh, please.

I'm only suggesting that

whatever action is taken

not be unduly harsh.

After all, the role of juvenile court

is corrective, not penal.

Despite Mr. Kindle's insistence

on venting some personal sense of rage.

Your Honor, if I am taking all of this personally,

it is because there is a hallway

full of Rollins' brothers out there that forces me to.

Kendal: Kevin Rollins obtained a gun,

loaded it with ammunition,

stalked Miss Van Owen,

and shot at her point blank.

Kendal: Now, what was his intent if not to commit murder?

If not to have her life extinguished

right then and there.

A few inches more is all it would have taken,

and the sheet that covered her

as she was taken from that courthouse

would have been all the way up over her eyes.

Now, if this was a rite of passage,

what was it a passage to?

A more effective weapon? Truer aim?

Mr. Norman has asked that the sentence not be unduly harsh,

but the reality of juvenile sentencing

is that regardless of what this court does,

Kevin Rollins will walk in two years.

Now, I think we owe Grace Van Owen a lot better than that.

Because a miracle prevented his bullet from piercing her heart,

she did not die on that marble floor.

And I hope that same miracle

doesn't serve to grant Rollins the impunity

that lets him try again.

Alright, gentlemen.

I'm prepared to issue my findings.

Based on the evidence presented here...

I find Kevin Rollins to have committed the acts

charged in the petition,

namely assault with intent to murder

and carrying a concealed weapon without a permit.

Judge: I find Mr. Rollins to be a ward of this court.

Pending the probation department report,

further hearings on the disposition is set for Friday.

[tense music]

Norman: Don't worry. I'll see you Friday.

Bailiff: Come on, son. Let's go.

female #1: I don't have the file for my next case.

Could you get it for me?

[indistinct chatter]

[music continues]

[serene music]

Inhale and sweep your arms

out and up.

Exhale as the palms come together.

I know it's early, people,

but our bodies are ready to inhale and lift

and slowly extend your torso

over your left leg.

Reach, use your stomach muscles.

Now relax and let the weight of your body

open up your torso.

[music continues]

Now slowly turn onto your left side,

take your right arm,

let it reach way over.

Shannon: And stretch.

[laughter]

Okay. Now slowly turn.

Place your chest back onto your thigh.

And relax and breathe.

Now put your palms on either side of your leg,

and slowly lift your body up.

[female #2 laughs]

How's the ankle?

A little sore.

And the ego?

Hey, it's Shannon. Remember me?

I tried to do something about my predicament,

and all I've managed is to humiliate myself.

Well, what exactly is your predicament?

[sighs] Being bald, getting older.

Let's face it.

It's not an encouraging picture.

Well, short of dying,

there's not much you can do about getting older, and...

as for being bald, I don't see

why you have to do anything at all?

Take a good look at me, Shannon.

Am I the sort of man women would be attracted to?

I think I've proved that already, haven't I?

- You did, didn't you? - Heh.

Looks have never been what's most important to me, Douglas.

I see people's bodies every day...

tall, short, skinny, fat, blonde, dark...

- Bald. Shannon: Bald.

Shannon: I'm a whole lot more interested in the way a person

is inside than outside.

And, believe me, your outsides aren't bad.

[chuckles]

Would you ever consider...

the possibility...

of entering into another liaison?

Sorry.

You're more involved with your wife than you think you are.

And I'm involved with someone else now.

Seriously involved?

Well, we'll see.

He's a really sweet guy.

We have a lot of fun together, and I'm happy.

Well, I'm glad.

Oh, here he is now. Douglas,

I'd like you to meet Axel.

Leon, first, and it pains me to do this.

I have to confirm your worst fears.

Your wife is having an affair.

A private investigator brought back photographs.

Leon: May I see them?

Becker: I don't think that you really want to.

I feel I at least have to look at them.

Leon: It's Richard. Becker: You know the guy?

He's the cabinet-maker who did the work on our kitchen.

I really like him too. It's funny.

Do you suspect that the two of them

have been tapping into any funds?

No, Richard's not a money guy. He's an artist.

You should see the cabinet work he did in our kitchen.

Leaving him out of it then, at least we're agreed

that Nancy's a little bit less

than the most worthy object of your largesse.

Arnie, all I wanted to be was fair with her

before I saw the pictures.

Having seen them hasn't really changed that.

Leon, what you have been proposing isn't being fair.

It's being a chump.

Your holdings in the Gearhart fund

were yours before you ever married,

and there's no reason on God's green earth

they should be hers after she's abandoned you,

any more than the house should.

Well, she really hasn't abandoned me.

She betrayed you. She cuckolded you.

Becker: Leon, take a look at where

those photographs were taken.

She didn't even have the decency

to sneak off and go to a motel.

They were taken right in your home,

the home you provided her with...

the home she's trying to snag for her very own.

I probably have to bear some of the blame in all of this.

Why?

Leon: I may not have been as attentive

as I could have been to some of her needs.

I think the demands of making a living

tended to crowd other things out.

It's all kind of ironic, though,

since the main reason I had for selling the business

was because I wanted to spend more time with Nancy.

With all due respect, Leon,

I don't think she was exactly starved for companionship.

There was obviously something I wasn't giving her.

Leon, you don't owe her your own impoverishment.

She is not entitled to be rewarded

for her faithlessness with riches.

I really don't wanna get into it.

Leon: Things can really get out of hand if you let them.

Now, I'd rather we settle this whole business

as quietly as possible.

I'll live with it.

Easier than I will.

[indistinct chatter]

Can I stamp your parking ticket, Mr. Shacter?

Oh. Yeah, thank you.

- I appreciate it. - It's alright.

I guess Arnie's annoyed with me.

Arnie just likes to get the best possible results for a client.

That's all.

I know I should be mad at her.

I just feel like I'm better off putting it all behind me.

I, uh...

I know this is none of my business,

and please tell me to butt out if you want me to.

But I think sometimes...

it's dangerous not to get angry.

I don't wanna sound like I've got it all figured out

or anything, but...

if you think you've been wronged,

you have to speak up.

You have to do something to set things right.

What about forgive and forget?

You can't forgive someone whom you've never blamed.

Oh, I don't say Nancy's right for what she did.

I'm not telling you what you should feel.

If what your wife's done...

doesn't make you mad, that's alright.

People react to things differently.

All I'm saying is that...

is that if it does...

you shouldn't be afraid to express it.

I hope I'm not out of line, but...

would you consider having dinner with me tonight?

Heh.

Clerk: All rise.

Be seated.

Judge: Has the jury reached a verdict?

We have, your honor.

Foreman: We find the defendant, Israel Hersch...

guilty.

Judge: So say you all?

So say us all.

The defendant's bail is continued.

Judge: Sentencing is set for...

March fifth.

Well, I'll tell you, Mr. Hersch,

it was a tough case to win.

"The poet is a prince of the clouds.

Haunting the tempest and laughing at the archer.

Exiled on earth among the shouting people."

Counselor, in my father's house

are many mansions.

Mr. Sifuentes?

May I speak to you a moment?

Sure.

I'm sorry about the verdict.

Oh, well, it was your call.

Well, after the judge's instructions,

we just felt we didn't have any choice.

But it sounds like the judge isn't going to

give him any time, though.

Well, we'll see.

Look, I don't know exactly how to say this, but you made

what could have been a dull couple of days

really very interesting. You made me think of things

I wouldn't have thought of otherwise.

And I just want to tell you, it's appreciated.

Well, thank you. Thank you very much.

I've always been fascinated by lawyers.

I think it's watching the way they stake out a court room

or-- or watching them cross-examine a witness.

Oh, it looks more glamorous than it actually is.

[chuckles] Yeah?

Um, look...

I-- I don't suppose that

since the random chance of jury duty

has sort of thrown us together...

Um, would you perhaps consider

having a bite of lunch together?

- Would you? - Yeah.

Yeah, I-- I'd consider that.

Good.

I want you to know I'm not in the habit of asking men out.

I wouldn't imagine that you would have to.

Thank you. That's really very nice.

So what made you do it this time?

I guess it was watching you work.

Sometimes I think I'd like to go to law school myself.

Really? You think you'd want to be a lawyer?

Oh, I don't know.

The way you cross-examine that police officer,

boring in again and again until you expose them

and then going in for the kill...

Hah...

I can tell you really enjoy your work.

Yeah, I do. I really do.

Most of the time, anyway.

[chuckles]

Well, I think that's important.

I like being around people who enjoy their work.

Let me ask you something. Um...

how would you feel about going out sometime?

As in date?

I think I'd like that, Victor.

Judge: I've read the report on Kevin Rollins

from the probation department,

and it presents far from a pretty picture.

An arrest record that you would expect

from a career criminal, twice Kevin's age.

Judge: Possession of a controlled substance

with intent to distribute.

Illegal possession of firearms. Armed robbery.

He's been expelled from school

for assaulting a teacher with a studded belt.

Home life is certainly not encouraging.

Father abandoned mother, mother on methadone maintenance.

Kevin, do you have anything to say?

I got nothing to say to you.

Judge: You realize that I'm about to send you away.

So what? My boys is everywhere.

Kevin: You think I'm scared to get sent up someplace?

No, Kevin. I don't think that you're scared of anything.

I'm not scared of anything you can do to me.

That's for damn sure.

Can you tell us why you did what you did?

Kevin: She messed with my man.

Do you understand that it was her job to prosecute Mr. Buckner

because he was accused of killing someone?

She did her job, I did my job,

now you do your job.

Alright, Kevin. I will do my job.

I commit you to the jurisdiction

of the California Youth Authority

until the age of twenty-four.

Judge: It is my profound hope that something or someone

intervenes between now and then

to open your eyes to the possibility

of being something other than a criminal.

If not for your benefit,

then for all of ours.

It's all the same to me.

[tense music]

Bailiff: Let's go.

[instrumental music]

You know, I had a pretty terrific time tonight.

I had a pretty terrific time myself.

- Really? - Really.

It's funny, because this is the sort of thing

I'm normally not very good at. [chuckles]

You're doing pretty good so far in my book.

Let's face it, Roxanne, I'm not a suave guy.

[laughs]

Leon, I think you can trust me

to draw my own conclusions.

You know, the best part of my coming to Mackenzie Brackman

is that I've gotten to meet you.

I guess being a secretary there has...

its benefits as well.

So what do I do now?

You kiss me goodnight.

[soft music]

Can I call you sometime so we can go out again?

- You sure can. - How about tomorrow night?

[laughs]

- Goodnight. - Goodnight.

[instrumental music]

Yeah.

Yeah, no problem. I'll tell her.

Uh-huh. Thanks.

Your body guard's gonna be five minutes late.

- Traffic. - Great.

How the hell is this bozo supposed to protect me

if he can't even negotiate morning rush hour?

Hey, don't kill the messenger.

[sighs] Sorry.

But this whole thing is ridiculous.

Kuzak: Well, let's hope so.

- I don't need a body guard. Kuzak: Well, you probably don't.

But a uniform presence can't hurt for a few more days.

It's an invasion of my privacy, Michael.

- I don't like it. - Yeah?

Well, a 13-year-old wacko with a .38

is also an invasion of your privacy.

Grace, I'm a little concerned

that you're not more worried about this.

Michael, if they can get to the president of the United States,

they can sure as hell get to me.

I refuse to worry about something I can't control.

[sighs] The hell with this. I'm going.

Kuzak: No, you're not.

Oh, yeah? Watch me.

Grace, you are behaving like a child.

If I am, it's because everyone is treating me like one.

Why are we fighting about this?

Van Owen: I don't know.

I'm sorry.

Look, if you won't worry about yourself,

at least do this for me, okay?

[laughs]

Okay, daddy.

There's my girl.

If I'm good, do you take me to Disneyland?

How about one of those water-bed motels on Ventura Boulevard?

- Hmm? - Heh.

- Hmm? - That's good too.

Mm-hmm.

[doorbell rings]

There he is. Gotta go.

Yeah, well, [clears throat]

have a reasonably pleasant day.

Yeah, thanks.

And, um...

don't forget about the sleazy motel.

Uh, reservations for three.

Right.

Nancy's attorney: Arnie, for the most part,

I think you're being quite fair.

But by the same token,

I think Nancy's also being fair.

The New York apartment is something

she's grown attached to. She's giving that up.

It was never hers to give up.

That apartment is Leon's separate property.

Nancy's attorney: Maybe it is, maybe it isn't.

I don't wanna argue that now.

The point is to require Nancy to pick up the taxes,

utilities, and insurance on the Palisades house

just because she's occupying it

strikes me as most unjust.

What was her contribution to the acquisition of that house

that she's gonna be occupying?

I hope you're not just talking dollars and cents here.

Look, I feel like we're moving backwards.

Nancy: Leon, I thought you said

you wanted me to have the house, didn't you?

You're getting the house.

Well, how long do you think I'm gonna keep it

if I have to pay for its upkeep?

It is a practical consideration, Leon.

Becker: If she can't afford the maintenance on the house,

she can sell the house. She can take the money

and buy a house she can afford.

Oh, wait a minute.

I'm operating here under the assumption

that there's at least some recognition on Leon's part

that this house holds a very special

sentimental place in Nancy's heart.

This was the marital home.

Nancy: I can't believe that you would see me lose that house.

After all I went through with that renovation?

Who picked out stenciled floor patterns?

Who went through custom mixing wall colors for six weeks?

Or meeting with the architect or the contractors? Did you?

Your accountant might have signed the checks,

but I put my heart and soul into that house.

Oh, I know you put a great deal into that house.

And not just your heart and soul, either.

And just what is that supposed to mean?

What it means is that adultery,

like a spiral staircase, adds to the cost of construction,

and my costs have become too much to bear.

Now I've been sitting here and listening to you,

and you know something?

You're not getting the house.

What we're going to do is sell the house,

and then split the proceeds after I first...

get back whatever separate property I sunk into it.

Leon, heh,

I'm going into shock.

What are you telling me now?

I thought that we were gonna behave

like human beings in this.

That's just what I'm doing.

You know, I'm sentimental about that house too.

I remember when we found it together.

I remember going out with you to buy furniture.

And that certainly was your house.

I wouldn't deny it for a minute.

But it was also mine.

And you betrayed me there.

You gave yourself to another man,

and you did it in my bed.

Now, if I could burn that house, I would.

Until it was ashes on the ground.

And then I'd salt the earth so nothing could grow.

Arnie, you'll handle the rest of the settlement.

If there are any problems,

we all know where the courthouse is.

Excuse me.

- Leon. - Hi.

- Are you alright? - I feel good.

You should. You showed a lot of strength in there.

You gave it to me.

Oh, I think you had it all along.

We're on for tonight, right?

Absolutely.

Oh, god. Excuse me, Douglas.

- I'm sorry. - It's alright, Stuart.

If I'm gonna wear this, I have to get used to it.

I can't be terrorized by the thought of people knowing.

Sounds sensible.

Stuart, let me ask you a question.

Mm-hmm.

Do you think this looks foolish?

No, I definitely do not think it looks foolish.

Would you wear one?

No. No, I wouldn't.

You'd go bald instead?

Yeah, I don't think there's any

great shame in being bald, Douglas.

There's certainly no great advantage to it, either.

Yeah, well, I guess I just...

take those things as they come, you know.

But you don't think I look foolish?

I think the only thing that looks foolish

is acting a way that makes you uncomfortable.

Being bald adds ten years to your age.

And worrying about it takes ten years off your life.

Douglas, we're all getting older.

It's the way God planned it, you know.

[toilet flushes]

Aye aye aye.

Well, what's the good word, Victor?

Mike.

Well, the good word is that I have a date tomorrow night

that I think at long last might finally lead to something.

Oh, yeah? Who is she?

She was serving on the Hersch jury.

Systems analyst.

She likes Chinese food,

going to the movies, dancing...

and roller skating in Venice on the weekends.

Oh. Sounds like a playmate of the month.

Well, I'll tell you, she is, uh, good looking.

But I think the thing I like most about her is that she seems

to be a real girl next door type, you know?

I guess what I'm looking for most is...

just a little companionship.

Companionship is tough to find, Victor.

Mm-hmm. You found it.

[chuckles] Yeah. Yeah, I guess I did.

Where did you used to take Gracie?

Let's see.

Le Chardonnay was the scene of some of our first dates.

Oh, I heard about that. It's nice, huh?

It's real pretty.

I'll make a reservation.

I think we are going to hit it off.

Kelsey: Well, I called 'em, and they're...

they're booked solid for the next six weekends.

Markowitz: Well, let's go someplace else.

It doesn't really matter.

I don't care if we go to Encino

as long as we get away.

Thanks. Can I have a little ketchup?

waiter: Mm-hmm. - Thank you.

- Is that all you're gonna eat? - That's it.

Boy, it really is a man's world, isn't it?

I trust you're gonna explain that remark.

A woman can never let up.

How will she look in pants?

How will she look in a skirt?

How will she look if, God forbid,

she has to go to the beach.

She peers into the mirror, looking for any signs

that she might be growing older.

Agonizing over everything, from the...

profile of her chin to the diameter of her ankles.

But a man can just...

scarf down his French fries,

put his hands in his pockets, and stroll out the door.

I don't buy it, Anne.

Men can be just as obsessed with their inadequacies,

or, pardon me, their imagined inadequacies, as women.

You don't think I've had a few anxious moments

looking at this face in the mirror?

- You, Stuart? - yeah.

You seem to me to be more at ease with yourself

than anyone I know.

It wasn't always that way.

But I figure by 40, a man has the face he deserves.

I just hope by the time I'm 40 you'll be as happy with my face

as you are with your own.

- Are you kidding? Kelsey: No, I'm not.

I may even be 50 one day.

I just hope you're 50 with me.

And 60. And seventy.

Ann, the things I love about you

don't go away with age.

You'll be just as able to make me laugh then

as you are now, right?

And calm me down or get me excited.

And drive me crazy.

That's why I love you.

Not because of the way you look in pants.

You don't like the way I look in pants?

[both chuckle]

Can we look at a dessert menu, please?

[laughs]

Hi, Conrad.

- Grace. - What can I do for you?

Uh, I wanted to see if we can't do a little housecleaning.

Starting, say, with Leshack.

Ah, otherwise known as Fat Dave.

I'm not saying he's a saint. But it's a shaky wrap.

The cops searched the trunk of his car.

Now, maybe they had probable cause. Maybe they didn't.

- It's a question mark. - What are you looking for?

[clears throat]

Felonious assault to misdemeanor,

assault burglary to trespassing. Now, given the facts,

I don't think I'm being all that out of line.

- See-- - Okay.

You agree?

I just said okay, didn't I?

Heh. Fantastic.

That wasn't so painful, was it?

Is that it?

Well, since I'm catching you on a good day,

what about Alma Rodriguez?

Now, we knock it down to petty theft

so that with credit for time served

she gets released on probation. What do you say?

Sure.

Sure.

Thank you.

Conrad: Bye.

[sighs]

[telephone ringing]

Great scott, Douglas. You're bald.

I think a lot of men look much better without hair.

Yeah, like who?

Sean Connery, Robert Duvall,

John Glenn, Y.A. Tittle.

When it comes right down to it, hair is a little iffy.

I mean, Castrati never lost their hair.

Castrati?

You know, with the high voices.

People generally associate

baldness with a high testosterone count.

At least that's what women tell me.

Well, no woman has ever told me that, Arnie.

Mike, you got a full head of hair.

Roxanne: Heh. - They don't wanna hurt you.

Roxanne: No, you pick this one.

Alright, alright.

Yeah. Pick me up at 8:00.

I'll see you then. Bye.

That wouldn't be 8:00 this evening

you're referring to, would it?

Yeah, it would. Why?

Well, I was hoping that we could knock out

the Romani separation agreement tonight.

Oh, I can't tonight, Arnie.

I've got plans.

Anyone I know?

Leon Shacter.

Come into my office for a minute, Roxanne.

Becker: Rox, what are we talking about

vis a vis you and Leon?

Is this a dinner with friendly chat,

warm, supportive conversation

leading to a spontaneous sexual fling,

or are we into deep eyeball gazing here?

Arnie, I'll let you know.

Rox, close the door.

Look...

Leon is a sweet guy. I'm well aware of that.

But what I want you to be aware of

is that he's also in a state of flux, emotionally,

and that deserves some caution.

Rox, you are the...

textbook transitional woman,

and I just don't wanna see your heart broken

when Leon's ready to move on.

Arnie.

Guys like that, they're an absolute bundle of need.

They have a yawning void in their own lives

which they want for you to step in and fill.

Look, Rox, I'm not trying to knock Leon.

It's just that I don't wanna see you...

expend yourself on someone who's gonna be a chronic dependent.

That's all.

[scoffs]

Arnie...

I don't see Leon that way.

I see him as a...

a sweet, considerate man,

who I am very much interested in spending time with.

I disagree with your opinion of him,

but if what you say proves to be right...

I'll deal with it when the time comes.

[knocks on door]

You wanted to see me, Bruce?

Come on in, Grace.

Sit down.

Bruce: Coffee?

No, thanks.

- How you feeling? - Oh, Bruce.

- I'm asking you. - And I'm telling you.

I'm fine.

So thank you for your concern,

and, um, I'd like to get back to work.

I know you would.

But I can't let you.

Bruce: Whether you care to admit it or not,

that punk's bullet wounded more than your arm.

It got to you. And it got to you deep.

Isn't psychoanalysis a little outside your area of expertise?

Yes, it is. But running the D.A.'s office isn't.

And I've got some real problems

with your performance, lady.

Such as?

You're cutting deals like a general amnesty was declared.

I can't allow that to continue.

That's a lot of crap.

Don't tell me it's a lot of crap.

You knocked 11 felonies down to misdemeanors last week.

You dropped the charges on two cases altogether.

Both were solid arrests.

I thought I had some discretion around here.

I thought I was supposed to use my judgment.

Bruce: Is this judgment or fear?

Now you've got defense lawyers

lining up to get into your office,

because the word is out that you're gun shy.

I can't allow this office to roll over

because you're scared to death to set foot in a court room.

If I do that, Rollins will have taken down

a good deal more than Grace Van Owen.

Until further notice, you're on the desk.

Rollins didn't take me down, Bruce. You're doing it.

Van Owen: I don't deserve this. - It isn't a punishment.

The hell it isn't. I have clocked as many hours in here

as anyone else, both before and after the shooting.

In return, I get second-guessed and humiliated.

You've lost your strength.

Bruce: I want it back.

It feels like the only thing I've lost... is my job.

[indistinct chatter]

- Hey. - Hi.

I was just on my way to pick you up.

Well, I got done with work early

and I called your secretary

to find out where you'd be.

Oh, I was really hoping I'd get another chance

to watch you work.

Oh, I'm sorry to disappoint you.

I was just filing a motion.

So, we have the whole courtroom to ourselves.

Yeah.

Our reservations aren't until 7:30,

so I thought maybe we can go for a drive or something.

Actually, you know what would really be interesting?

What?

I'd like to see what it's like to be cross-examined.

W-- what do you mean?

Well, I'll be the defendant, and I want you to interrogate me.

I wanna see if you can strip away my composure.

- I don't know. - He-he-he.

[laughing] Oh, come on.

Come on. Let's say...

uh, I stand accused of...

Oh, I don't know...

prostitution.

I don't understand. You, uh...

you want me to make this up as I go along?

Oh, come on. You know what to do.

Hm.

You were standing on the corner of Hollywood and Ivar

at about 3:00 a.m. Isn't that true?

Yeah, I go there sometimes.

Describe what you were wearing.

Satin shorts, lurex tights.

Seven-inch heels.

And a tank top that said,

"So many men, so little time."

[both chuckle]

Come on.

Come on...

Isn't it a fact that you approached a certain car...

that had stopped for a light on Ivar?

I might have.

And didn't you offer to perform

various sexual acts in return for money?

Oh, my god.

- You're calling me a whore. - When?

In front of all these people, you're calling me a whore.

You're saying I performed sexual acts

on men whose names I didn't even know.

- Gwen. - Dozens of men each day.

What did I do to them? Say it out loud.

- Say it out loud. - Ah--

Violate me, Victor.

Violate me until they throw me down into that cell

and the jailer locks the door.

Treat me like the whore that I am!

Oh, I forgot. You're not like the rest.

You won't be slobbering over me in the car later

after you've bought me a quick meal.

Romance is a lie, jerk!

I put six years into that office...

and it doesn't count for a thing.

I could've been making three times the money I'm making now,

but instead...

I've got close to nothing in the bank.

And I get sandbagged at work for my trouble.

And you really think that's what Rogoff's doing?

Yeah, I do. You have an alternate interpretation

you wanna give me?

Yeah. I think he sees

that you were shaken, and he's trying to help.

Do me a favor, Kuzack. Don't you start

wringing your hands over me.

I've had it up to here with all this

solemn, paternalistic clucking.

That kid turned that corridor into a war zone, Gracie.

Getting shot is not nothing--

Now, wait a minute. I'm the one who got shot.

Don't you tell me what it is and what it isn't.

I don't need a nurse maid.

I don't need for you to be sitting there,

staring at me like I was

some orphan at Christmas time.

I got hit by a bullet. Okay.

That's what happened. The doctor treated the wound.

The whole thing will be healed with another week and a half.

My life doesn't have to change one bit.

Do you understand that? Not one bit!

I do not need a shrink!

I do not need a vacation.

I do not need to eat.

I do not need to break down.

- No! - Grace. Grace.

Grace.

[crying] Michael, I'm so scared.

I'm so scared.

[theme music]

[music continues]