Original subtitles

[futuristic music]

[male voice] Good evening's, inmates.

It's time for your writer's evening announcements,

Congratulations go out to Jammerhead!

this week's model prisoner... again.

Over 243 hours without moving!

A new prison record!

Way to go, Jammerhead.

[grunts]

[phasing sounds]

Jammerhead! Finnaly!

Hey, boss!

Oh, man! Those turtles really did a number on you.

Your mind is still frag.

[metal banging]

Oops.

Just hang on, boss!

We did just like you thought us in case of emergency.

[low organ music]

[machine sounds]

Rebooting.

[grunts]

Rebooting.

I told you that extended warranty was garbage!

[footsteps]

[Street Phantom] Just give him a second!

Huh?

Hey! Prison break, sector five, street phantoms!

The jig's up! We're coming out.

[siren sounds, tense music]

[phasing souds]

[swoosh, tense music]

[Street Phantom] Welcome home, Jay.

[suspense music, engine sound from a combat plane]

♪ It's ninja time! ♪

♪ Four teenage turtles surfed

in on a wave from the past ♪

♪ It's like the future's

a party that these brothes just crashed ♪

♪ Don't know when they'll go home. How long the good time will last ♪

♪ But just stick around and see these turtles go... ♪

♪ Fast Forward! Leonardo, Donatello! ♪

♪ Fast Forward! Raphael, Michelangelo! ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant

Ninja Turtles ♪

♪ Fast Forward! ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant

Ninja Turtles ♪

♪ It's Ninja Time! ♪

♪ This future stuff is so strange. Time can get rearranged ♪

♪ But the more things change, the more they also stay the same ♪

♪ Still kickin' butt, and playin' video games ♪

♪ Drivin' everyone nuts. Future's really insane! ♪

♪ Fast Forward! ♪

♪ Get outta my way! ♪

♪ Fast Forward! ♪

♪ It's so not yesterday! ♪

♪ Fast Forward! ♪

♪ It's the only way to play! ♪

♪ Fast Forward! ♪

♪ Guess we're here to stay! ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant

Ninja Turtles ♪

♪ Fast Forward! ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant

Ninja Turtles ♪

[male voice] You have disgraced my name!

Destroyed my clan! Taken everything from me!

Except for my spirit.

And my kung fu!

Both of which I will to restore my--

[Mikey] Look look! Master Fighter's about to do

his angry mongoose cobra show bustin'!

Huh?

[Mikey] Wham! Look at that!

How does he bend that way?

It's not even human.

[kung fu sounds]

Isn't it beautiful?

[piano music]

[Donatello] Sweet!

Master Fighter 13: Revenge of the Mongoose Fighter.

Where did you find this?

[Cody] When I told Mikey I've never seen a kung fu movie before,

he nearly popped a vessel.

But I just don't get it.

[Cody] You guys mix it up for real all the time.

[Cody] That's just a movie.

[Cody] I mean, It's just an actor, right?

- A fake. - Shh.

[Raph] Don't say "fake" around Mikey.

[Leo] He takes his kung fu flicks pretty seriously.

Look at the grace! The moves!

The way the veins pop out of his neck!I t's perfection!

Ow...

It's the perfect way to cut the circulation to your brain, Michelangelo.

Should you not be warming up in the dojo?

[Mikey] You bet! If I practice hard enough,

I can be as good as Master Fighter, right?

Of course, not. That is all fume trickery and wires. Fake.

Who the-- Fake--

- It's okay, Mikey. Come on. - Fake!

[Donnie] Let's go practice the shock away.

[Serling] Master Cody, Master Splinter,

reptilian hoodlums, Miss Starlee Hambrath's to see you.

Hey, Starlee! What's--

[Starlee] Work! Lots of work! Need to verify some plans with you.

Today, I will supervise the testing on the beta nanodrones.

And the testing bots are scheduled for maintenance.

I can sleep in the lab. I don't mind. It'll only take four days.

Starlee, wait!

None of this stuff has to get done right now.

[Cody] What's going on?

[sighs] Okay.

It's my family.

They're coming for a visit.

Mom decided it was time to come to Earth and officially "check-in" on me.

And by "check-in," I mean "drive me crazy until I agree to go home".

It'll be a week-long nag fest about how dangerous and savage Earth is.

Hmm. Sometimes, family is best enjoyed in the company of others.

Perhaps Cody would care to host a fine civilized meal here tonight.

I can help with the O'Neil Tech tour if you want. Any excuse to hang out there.

Plus, I'm sort of an expert on crazy families.

Thank you so much! All of you!

Hey, that's what friends are for!

Yeah! To make up for the family you got stuck with.

Ow!

[suspense music]

[Jammerhead] Alright! Now that my reboot's complete,

let's get down to business.

[Jammerhead] I mold than a little payback from those shellheads for

[Jammerhead] putting me in lock-up.

Boss, say the word and we'll track them all.

No. It's got to be me. Alone.

Respect means everything on the street.

Those turtles may be good at hand-to-hand,

[Jammerhead] but there are even greater martial arts masters out there.

[Jammerhead] And all of their moves have been archived.

And lucky me!

I got a chip jack right into my cerebral cortex.

Hold onto your circuits.

[computer sounds]

[Jammerhead] Yeah, baby!

[wood breaking]

[Jammerhead] Download of destruction!

[laughs maniacally]

Great! We bust him out and he fries his brains again.

[grunts]

[Jammerhead] Foot flick of bau-chung!

[Jammerhead] Spinning winds of wu-tang!

[object smash, grunts in pain]

I know kung fu! And karate!

And jujitsu, kung pao!

Martian fisticuffs! Plutonium thumb wrestling!

Somebody give me a "whoa!"

[all whoa]

And now, somebody give me some turtles.

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles! ♪

♪ Fast Forward! ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles! ♪

♪ Fast Forward! ♪

[Mrs. Hambrath] Starlee!

[Mrs. Hambrath] My sweet star splotch.

Oh, let me have a look at my little kabibble.

- Have you gained weight? - Mom!

Oh, you're right.

We'll talk diet later. Hugs!

[Starlee's dad] Ooh, wait.

Let me get that.

[Starlee's dad] Perfect!

Hi, daddy.

[Cody] Maybe, I should've let her sleep in the lab.

Hi! I'm Starlee's friend, Donatello.

What's with the mask? Is he a criminal? Have you joined a cult?

Mom!

[slurping]

Hey, pretty cool, huh?

You must be Glaxor!

Uh, careful with that.

[Glaxor] Are you her boyfriend? 'Cause she talks about her boyfriend all the time.

And if you're not the boyfriend, you look an awful lot like

the guy she says is her boyfriend.

- Hah! - [rattle] Oops.

It's okay. Don't worry.

Glaxor!

[screams]

[machine sounds]

[laser sounds]

[Donnie] Uh oh! Everybody, get down!

[all scream]

Ooh, boy! That'll make the family's annual highlight reel.

I take it you're insured, Mr. Jones.

And that your friend has had his shots.

Welcome to my life.

[Donatello] Um, right.

[Donatello] Cody, why don't you start the tour,

[Donatello] while I clean this mess up?

[Jammerhead] Since they hang with that Jones brat,

I knew those green freaks would show their shells here, eventually.

Let the pain begin!

[Cody] Thanks, Don. What would you like to see first?

Our nano lab is state of the art.

[Cody] Did I mention how valuable Starlee is to us?

[Mrs. Hambrath] Does this place have a gift shop?

[Glaxor] I need to go to the little boy's room.

[Glaxor] I have to make a number four.

[Starlee] Glaxor!

[Glaxor] What? It's a basic--

[doors close]

Okay...

I'll activate a couple of jani-bots, and we'll be done in a snap.

[Jammerhead] I was thinking the same thing.

[phasing sounds]

Only I'm not sure what to snap first.

Jammerhead?

You're supposed to be in jail!

And you're supposed to be kissing my feet.

[fighting grunts]

Woah, what just happened? [engine sound]

Just a little move I like to call "Leaping Lizard Crouching Monkey".

[computer sounds]

[Jammerhead] I got a million of them!

For example, the Crack Turtle!

[swoosh, matalic clatters]

Wait a minute.

This isn't right. Only a true martial arts master can execute moves like that.

I've seen you fight and you're just a hardwired thug.

A thug with an upgrade.

Looking for payback from the green freaks who besmirched his honor.

[fighting grunts]

Hiyah!

Fine. You want to play kung fu,

you're going to ninja school.

[spinning, swoosh]

[Jammerhead] School is for losers.

I'm a cheat sheet sort of guy.

[spinning sound, grunts]

[fighing grunts]

[spinning sound, laughs evilly]

[fighting sounds]

[swoosh, metallic clanking]

- [Donatello grunts] - [Jammerhead] Phew.

Catch you later. And I mean that.

'Cause I'm just getting started.

[beeping]

[whizz]

[Donatello] By the time I woke up, he was gone.

[beeping]

[Leonardo] You sure that was Jammerhead?

[Donatello] No doubt. But upgraded!

He's got moves I've never even seen before. Ever!

No offense, but if he's so good, why aren't you in traction?

[Mrs. Hambrath] I am just... [Raphael] Ix-nay on the ighting-talk-fay.

It's all you ever hear about.

Earth crime this, Earth filth that.

Oh, Matron is so peaceful.

[Starlee] Yeah, and my family isn't there.

[door closes]

[Cody] How do you know when the, uh, traditional Omatronian mildew is done?

[Glaxor] What sort of dough blat doesn't know how to make mildew?

You just stir until the film thickens.

- [grunt] - [scream]

Oh!

[clatters] U h!

[splash]

[grunts, slow piano sounds]

Perhaps Master Glaxor

would prefer to help from the safety of his own galaxy.

[door opens, ominous music]

[door closes]

[Splinter] Clearly, Jammerhead seeks revenge.

And believes he has found a way to achieve it.

If he attacked you once, he will do so again.

[Leo] Right. As soon as we can, we should sneak out of here and try to beat Jammerhead

to the punch.

[explosion, high pitched horn]

[all cough, metallic clatters]

[high pitched horn]

Hi, honey. I'm home!

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles! ♪

♪ Fast Forward! ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles! ♪

♪ Fast Forward! ♪

[loud organ music]

Since I didn't even break a swear pounding one of you,

[Jammerhead] I thought I'd try out all four.

Bring it, hoozers.

[Splinter] Jammerhead, you--

He's our problem, Master.

[Mrs. Hambrath] What was that? I distinctly heard a boom.

You make sure nothing ruins Starlee's civilized evening.

As you wish, my son. But hurry, for my sake if not yours.

[Mikey] Let's show him how we deal with party crashers.

- [fighting grunts] - [laughs, beeping]

[metallic sounds, kung fu sounds]

[swoosh]

[smack, grunts]

[loud horn sound] [thud]

My spine hurts.

[kung fu sounds]

[Leonardo] Woah. That's an Okinawa mantis-style nerve strike.

Only a handful of shaolin masters can pull off that move.

Thanks for noticing.

[swoosh]

[Raph] Let's crash his computers.

Permanently.

[fighting sounds, metallic clanking]

[loud fighting sounds]

What's happening out there?

I want to see.

[Cody] Uh, Mrs. Hambrath, you're probably feeling cooped up

in here.

Let's go out and see the hanger! The view is really quite amazing.

My apologies, madam.

It is simply the television.

The boys like to watch with the volume turned up.

Hmph. No doubt one of those hyperviolent mind-numbing Earth shows.

[fighting sounds]

[fighting sounds]

Sorry to be the one to break it to you,

your ninjutsu is poo-poo.

[laughs]

Huh?

[groans]

[fighting grunts]

[Mrs. Hambrath] This is all very interesting, Mr. Splinter,

[Mrs. Hambrath] but if father doesn't get his mildew, he gets cranky.

Uh, certainly, yes.

But did I mention that Starlee was instrumental

in the development of the Hovershell?

[Starlee] Which is our cue to go for a ride.

You haven't seen New York until you've seen it from a giant flying turtle.

[Cody] Yeah, and while we go sight-seeing, the guys could use your help, Master Splinter.

With a little technical problem.

Okay, something's not rushka here. I know it.

You are hiding something from me.

You burned the mildew, didn't you?

Mhmm. Yep! That's it, exactly.

[Starlee] Can't put one past you, mom. It's take-out for everyone.

[screams, then groans]

[silence]

[Raph] Uh... nice shoes?

[fighting music, metallic clatters]

[yawns]

[tense music]

[Mrs. Hambrath] Oh, my goodness. These must be the Earth gangs I've heard of.

Starlee! What sort of people are you consorting with?

We're leaving right now and taking you home where you belong.

[light music]

[loud horn sound]

[metallic clatters]

[laughs] Nowhere else to run.

[tense music, beeping]

[computer sounds]

[kung fu sounds]

[fighting sounds, swoosh]

[smash, glass shatter]

[all gasp]

[high pitched tense music]

You're finished.

[all scream]

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles! ♪

♪ Fast Forward! ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles! ♪

♪ Fast Forward! ♪

[all scream]

No!

[loud tense music, vehicle engine sound]

[swoosh]

[grunts, metallic sound]

[Mikey] Grab shell and hang tight!

[loud tense music]

[grunts, swoosh]

[Raphael] Hey! No falling down on the job!

[swoosh]

[Jammerhead] And that's how you get back street cred.

[Splinter] Jammerhead!

[horn sound]

You want to fight? Fight a true master.

Bonus round, baby!

[oriental nature music]

[Cody] Starlee! Mrs. Hambrath! Wait!

[Mrs. Hambrath] It's like I always say,

"Earth is a wretched hive of scum and villainy."

- [Mrs. Hambrath] We're leaving this instant. - [Glaxor] Ooh.

Ooh. Wah! [clatter]

No! [swoosh]

[vases breaking]

No, please. Stay. I insist.

[Starlee] Mom! These are good people.

If I were in trouble, they'd help me!

If you want to run away, go ahead. I'm staying to help.

[Starlee] Cody, I have an idea.

You? What can you do to help?

[Mrs. Hambrath] Starlee!

- [growls] - [surprised] Oh!

[Glaxor] Ooh. Someone's in trouble.

[laughs evilly]

Hmmm...

[laughs]

[tense music]

[laughs]

[tense music, fighting grunts]

[fighting sounds]

[fighting grunts]

[fighting grunts]

[vehicle sounds]

Master Splinter!

[fighting grunts]

[punches, screams]

[grunts in pain]

[Donnie] Master Splinter!

[tense music]

[Starlee] I'm going to run your security system to scan Jammerhead

[Starlee] on all wave lengths.

This guy is all about wet-wiring circuitry into himself, right?

[Starlee] So obviously, he's got some sort of enhancement,

[Starlee] or he wouldn't stand a chance against the guys.

[loud bang] [Glaxor] Oops!

[light music, metallic clatters]

[Mrs. Hambrath] Starlee! Snagglepuss.

[Starlee] We need to isolate that hardware

[Starlee] and figure out how to disable it.

[computer sound]

[Starlee] Scanning Jammerhead now.

[Cody] Make it quick.

[computer sounds]

[smash, grunts]

[laughs]

What do we have for pest control?

[grunts]

[Raph] A foot full of this!

[swoosh, grunts in pain]

Okay, you caught me snoozing. I'll give you that.

[Jammerhead] But now, I'll give you something special I've been saving.

[computer sounds, kung fu sound]

[chi sounds]

Ultimate dragon sphere chi cannon!

Starlee, hurry it up.

[computer typing sound]

There!

[computer sounds]

[Starlee] A credisk scan translator.

[Starlee] It reads phyiscal movements stored on disk,

[Starlee] translates them into signals,

[Starlee] and transmits them into the cerebral cortex

[Starlee] so the body can copy them.

I've isolated the source signal.

I can jam it. But with what?

[screams, metallic clatters]

[Glaxor] Ow... [piano music]

[music]

Dad! Your camera!

[Mikey] Okay, if we weren't about to get fried,

that would be so cool.

Isn't it sweet?

The family that sticks together, sinks together.

[computer sounds, light music]

[Glaxor] Hmm.

[screams]

What the?

We're live! Do it again!

[Glaxor] Hmm. [thud]

[rhythmical music, screams]

Huh?

[rhythmical music]

No! Drat!

[Jammerhead] Access is... access my moves!

[Jammerhead] Get this kid out of my head!

[grunts, light music]

[screams]

[rhythmical music]

[clinking, screams]

[smash, grunts, rhythmical music]

[loud rhythmical music]

[grunts, cymbal sounds]

[loud horn sound, rattle]

How--

Questions later.

[low tense music]

No!

[Raph] Right now, I'm the master.

[grunts]

[light music]

[Splinter] Madam, if I may.

[Splinter] You have raised a remarkable daughter.

[Mrs. Hambrath] She does know how to handle herself in a crisis, doesn't she?

And the brains in that head!

My side, of course.

[Starlee's dad] Uh?

There are only two things we can give our children.

One is rules.

And the other is wings.

[Mrs. Hambrath] Uh?

It means, you may not like Earth

but I do.

You need to let me be here, mom.

Listen to the rodent, dear.

[laughs happily]

[Glaxor] Group hug! [Humming]

[all scream]

[Mikey] Man, they almost make our family look normal.

[Raphael] Hey. At least we don't eat mildew.

[ominous music]

[loud cheers]

[Jammerhead] Yeah, that's right. I'm back.

Who's gonna do what about it? Huh, who?

[ominous music] [Jammerhead] Ow!

Huh?

[loud horn sound]

Fellas, really?

When did revenge ever solve anything?

[Jammerhead] Fellas... [laugh awkwardly]

[Jammerhead] Ouch! Pain! [loud rhythmical music]

[Jammerhead] Sorry! It was an accident! Guards! [screams]