Original subtitles

[gentle piano music]

[indistinct chatter]

[chatter]

It's November.

[Man] I think it was Shakespeare who once said

a stranger is just a friend you haven't met before.

I blame the Americans!

[chuckles] Maybe it wasn't Shakespeare.

I think I might have read it in a fortune cookie.

Anyhow, I like to believe it's true.

There's so much more that connects us

than makes us different.

Perhaps we should offer the odd random hello a bit more often.

Who knows?

Maybe the old fella next to you in the post office queue

hasn't spoken to anyone all day.

A casual, "How you doing?" might be a real tonic.

Maybe we should try it.

I mean, what's the worst that can happen?

Tickets and railcards, please.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Yep. OK. Thank you.

Yep.

Yep.

Thank you.

I'm in the wrong jacket.

There's no dress code. Just need a ticket.

No, I, erm... I left work in a rush. Erm...

But I've got one.

It's a season ticket. You know that.

I see thousands every day. I can't remember them all.

I need to charge you full-price single.

No, I, erm... I can't.

I have a ticket. You've seen it hundreds of times.

If a tree falls in a forest and no one's there to hear it,

it still needs a ticket. That's £40, please.

Look, I don't have the money. Please.

You know I have a season ticket.

[Liverpool accent] You know he has a season ticket.

Well, he doesn't today.

So you admit you know he does have one.

Yeah, we all do. We see him every morning.

-Except Fridays. -I go in early.

So leave him alone.

OK, OK. Look...

Maybe it's in another pocket, OK?

I'll go and do the rest of the train

and maybe you'll find it by the time I get back, OK?

Yeah, yeah.

Thank you.

[conductor] Thank you.

Thank you very much.

-Thank you. -I, er...

-I don't think he's coming back. -[conductor] Lovely.

Thank you, sir.

[Man] But really, you never know what someone's story is.

Maybe we'd be better people

if we tried to find out.

-Stupid... Oh, my gosh! -Oh!

-I'm so sorry. -Sorry.

No, no. That was my fault. Sorry. Presents!

-Sorry. I didn't see you there. -That's OK.

Lucky you had that thing on.

Yeah, I don't actually own a bike.

[chuckles] Is it... is it OK?

Yeah, it'll be fine. It's been through worse.

You're way ahead of the game. I hope you haven't spoiled me.

I'm just getting you what I got you last year.

[chuckles]

[woman] Get them a box at the opera.

Nothing German.

And, er, Chelsea tickets for the trading boys?

-[sighs] -[woman] Hm-hmm.

-[dog barks] -Woody, here's your ball! Whoo!

-[woman] Yeah, I know. -Oh...

-[dog barks] -[woman speaks indistinctly]

[woman] Actually, hang on. Make it Crystal Palace.

Might teach them some humility.

[chuckles] Thanks, Steph. All right. Bye.

-Hi. -Hey, Ads.

I had a religious moment on the train.

Oh, yeah? Did you see Jesus in the window seat?

This guy had forgotten his ticket

and the conductor's being a dick.

But everyone really stood up for the kid.

-Hmm. -Stuck it to the man.

It's how I imagine the French Revolution started.

Er, I'm not sure about that.

No, but just then, everyone looked really, really familiar.

And then I thought, "Why are we not all, like, friends?"

Well, maybe not friends, but, you know, the odd hello.

Oh, no. Never engage on a commute.

That's page number one.

Cos you'll find out that the guy sitting opposite you

is some Holocaust-denying, Evangelical Christian.

-So young and so cynical. -I'm serious. Trust me.

Right, I have to get back into town.

-What? -Yeah. Bahrain's just flown in.

-The whole country? -Yeah, probably.

I'm gonna stay at my place tonight, all right?

-Amanda! -See you later. Bye.

-[exhales] -[door closes]

[slow waltz music]

[Adam] I had a thought last night.

[man] Uh-oh.

Do you think we've become a bit stale? Predictable?

Well, youhave.

You landed on that turned-up jeans and white Converse combo

back in 2010, and you've stuck with it ever since.

I meant our campaigns.

Maybe we should try another angle.

No, no. Like... No. No.

Being asked to pitch on this is huge for us.

This shop spends millions on their Christmas ad.

It's a national bloody treasure.

Yeah, but the brief this year?

Guerrilla style, edgy, trying to catch a real moment.

And they've waited till now.

All their competitors' campaigns are already running.

Yeah, well, they say that, but really, what they want

is a kid and snow and a talking unicorn under the staircase.

-I've got another idea. -No, we've got an idea.

We've got all these boards.

If we go in with what we think they want, we'll never get it.

Adam!

But really...

you can never know what someone's story is.

Maybe we'd be better people if we tried to find out.

Like I said, a stranger is just a friend you haven't met yet.

It's an ethos that I think

chimes with what this story has been doing for centuries.

Thank you.

I... don't get it.

Sorry, Miranda?

Your idea is to basically invite a group of random people...

[Adam] That already share something.

Residents in the same neighbourhood

or folks who use the same park.

To invite them to a Christmas dinner.

-And you film this... -Car crash.

I was thinking celebration.

This event...

To prove what, exactly?

That there's more that unites us than divides us.

Oh.

[Miranda sighs] Oh, Adam.

It's forced fun, and no one likes that.

Sorry, but thanks for pitching, boys.

Tell the guys at Blancmange they've got it.

I want it locked and on air in a week.

Maybe save this for next year.

I'm sure the guys at frozen foods will love it.

[man] What the heck was that?

Your idea would never have worked.

People go to parks cos they're there,

-not to get to know each other. -Oh, I'm sorry, Paul.

[sighs] We'll have to close the office

and give the guys an extra couple of weeks off.

Yeah, but we still have the Anderson job to deliver.

Oh, the Anderson job! Why did we take that?

Need to keep the heating on.

Or we should just connect you to the radiators

and run them on hot air.

All packed. Better go now so I don't miss the flight.

So, if you FaceTime me about 11,

you'll catch me before I leave the office

and I'll catch you getting ready for bed.

Don't be that guy.

I cannot wait till we're across that pond

and I get you all to myself.

-Love you. -Oh.

♪ Nah-nah-nah-nah! Happy Christmas!

Hmm.

-I can't believe you're going. -Yeah, well...

New boss got the whole company out there for Christmas Eve.

-Can't miss it. -You could have said no.

[man] And you could have come to Chicago with me.

You said it was for employees only.

No, I didn't. [chuckles]

-Oh. -[clicks fingers]

[man] Laptop.

-[Adam] You know our big pitch? -[Amanda] Hm-hmm.

-[Adam] We didn't get it. -[Amanda] Your idea stunk so...

"Wind Beneath My Wings." It did not stink.

See, you live in this rose-tinted myopia.

Like moving here.

Just cos people say hello to you in the street

doesn't make them any nicer.

-Doesn't it? -No.

They're saying hello cos they haven't seen anyone all day.

Anyway, I bet you're secretly pleased they didn't go for it.

What?

You like the idea of something far more than actually doing it.

Is that what you really think of me?

It's not what I think, babe. It's who you are.

[brakes squeal]

[chime]

[conductor] Apologies, everyone. We are being held here.

I will let you know as soon as this problem is resolved.

-Relax, son. -Er, what's the holdup?

There's a signal problem up ahead.

Do we know what caused that?

Well, sir, I would say privatisation

by Maggie Thatcher, milk snatcher, 30 years ago.

That's why you pay more

than anyone else in Europe, my friend.

Hmm!

Er...

Hi, everyone. Erm...

Can I just have your...?

Hi.

Morning. Chairman.

My name's Adam King

and I just thought... as we have a minute,

I'd take the opportunity to say something.

I've been thinking this for a while now

and seeing how everyone got all Spartacus a few weeks ago

when the young man couldn't find his ticket,

well, it just made me want to try something.

We get this train together, most of us, every morning.

Same train, same journey, same faces.

Maybe it's just me.

But I think it's a bit daft that we don't, you know... chat.

Well, some people think it's impossible,

but maybe it's time we got to know each other.

So I thought that being the season of goodwill and all that,

I'd like to invite everyone on this train to a party.

A Christmas party.

Just for us.

A little get-together.

After a year of delays, cancellations, fare increases

and, of course, our worst nightmare...

-Replacement bus service. -[clicks fingers]

You got it, brother.

The replacement bus service. [groans]

We've been through that hell together.

We deserve a bottle of beer and a sausage roll for that alone.

So, erm...

Yeah, just, er...

Think about it.

-Hmm? -[chime]

[conductor] A miracle at Christmas, folks.

The signal is working, so, as you were.

[♪ "Let's Get Together This Christmas"]

[Paul] Are you serious?

They're strangers.

Well, I know one of them. She...

Staring at some woman's cleavage

and then nodding a hello when she catches you looking

is not knowing someone.

Got some doughnuts.

And what happens when it's a disaster when no one shows up?

You said it never would have worked. I think it would have.

Jeez. The Force is strong with you, isn't it?

[mimics Yoda] Custard ones I have. Hmm?

Why would someone do that? Hasn't he got any mates?

I think it's lovely. I see these people every day.

I'm always trying to suss out

who they are and what they're about.

There's this one old guy who's got an old shopping bag

with a Tupperware box with his sandwiches in it.

Once a week, he pops in a biscuit. Always a Snowball.

Never changes it up. I think is this a treat

to get him through the hump of the week?

Or is it for a special someone at his work?

This is the stuff you think about?

["Let's Get Together This Christmas" plays]

♪ Ooh, together with you ♪

♪ Oh, oh, this Christmas ♪

♪ Together with you ♪

♪ Let's get together this Christmas ♪

♪ Together with you ♪

♪ Oh, baby, let's get together this Christmas ♪

-Party guy. -[chuckles] Hello.

Hi.

[announcer] We are sorry to announce

the 9:40 service to Langton has been cancelled.

Great.

Anything?

No. I guess everyone's trying to get an Uber

at this time of night.

Got a company account. One of those private-car places.

Ooh. Very fancy.

What do you do?

Er, got a little advertising agency.

Would I know any of your stuff?

If you buy cat litter, you might.

Or if your nanna has a bath with a door in it.

-[both laugh] -Someone's gotta do it.

Hey! Do you have a car that can pick us up

from Liverpool Street Station to take us out to Langton?

Yeah. Happy to wait. Thanks.

There's a... caff across the street.

-Sorry. Closed. -Ah.

Any chance we could wait for our taxi?

Just till I've closed down, yeah?

Hmm. Thanks.

["Ding Dong Merrily On High"]

-So what do you do? -I cook.

I cook, as well as writing cat-litter ads. So I win.

Until the New Year.

-Then what? -Chicago.

You're doing a musical?

-OK. You win. -[chuckles] The city.

New Year, new life. I'm moving.

-Really? -Hmm, yeah.

That's fantastic. I envy you.

I could never do something like that. [chuckles]

So you're... you're really serious

about this Christmas party?

Never been more serious in my life.

Which I can see reflects badly on me, but...

Do you... fancy a drink?

I've got, erm, a couple of bottles of IPA,

some senbei crackers and some cannolis.

-Sorry. Is that OK? -No worries. Christmas, innit?

You eat better out of your handbag

than I do when I'm throwing a dinner party.

Ah! Little perks from suppliers.

You must get plenty of freebies.

Got a few gallons of antifreeze back in my office

if the IPA doesn't hit the spot.

[Emma chuckles]

What do you reckon they're like, the other folks on the train?

I always wonder. You know the City guy?

Handmade suit and Masonic pinkie ring?

Hmm.

I always saw him as this self-assured giant of industry.

And then one day, I saw him in B&Q.

He was looking at pipes and stuff,

and he looked completely out of his depth.

Totally incompetent.

[chuckles] I can imagine.

I'm always making up their life stories

based on what they're reading.

You know the kid who forgot his ticket?

-Yeah. -Science fiction, usually.

So I have him as a dreamer.

More comfortable in his own mind than the real world.

That woman with the bob's always reading.

She uses her book like a shield. Says, "Don't talk to me."

Loner. Then there's the romantic.

Jane Austen

and DH Lawrence. So, I mean, basically chick lit,

but too much of a snob for Marian Keyes.

[chuckles] I don't know whether to be impressed or terrified.

Well, I'm not the one throwing them a Christmas party.

Maybe you can help.

Ah.

[Adam] You seem to know what they're like.

No. I'm just guessing. But if you got to know them,

then you really would know what they're like.

♪ They're slugging it out at the station ♪

♪ Laden with last-minute bling ♪

♪ The poor get ignored and the stores are at war ♪

♪ And the registers guiltily ring ♪

If you did need some help

with, erm, planning and stuff...

Thanks.

♪ Gotta see my people again ♪

Night.

♪ Is your heart coming home this Christmas? ♪

[Simon] Babes, now that I'm here,

I'm thinking there's no point

in me coming back for the move, is there?

It's all booked in and you'll only have a case,

unless, of course, you really need me there,

then, of course, but that flight is a slog.

Fine. Fine. No big deal.

Yeah, you'll manage it.

And you're gonna love this place. It's party central.

Oh, hold on, my cab's calling me.

Goodbye, Simon.

♪ Too young to settle down ♪

♪ Had many a drunken Christmas lost ♪

♪ In every kind of town ♪

♪ And I can't deny the miracle ♪

♪ That night I kissed you, dear ♪

♪ Just tell me that you're coming... ♪

[Amanda] When are you gonna have this Christmas party experiment?

Cos we've got Mum's party on the 20th.

Then a reception on the 21st.

And then the Robinson Tonker dinner on the 22nd.

I'll, erm, I'll go with the 22nd.

So I'll need to miss the Robinson Tonker dinner.

Whatever that is.

They're important potential clients.

You can't make me go on my own.

Come on. You're brilliant at small talk.

I knew there was a reason we were together.

Baby, I know you think this party idea is stupid,

but I've put it out there now. I have to deliver.

[sighs] You're such an idiot.

[sighs]

Look, this little party thing, it's really sweet, babe,

but my job is... is important to me.

[sighs]

♪ I swear I saw it coming off the snow ♪

Just wanted to say thanks.

For throwing the party?

God, no! Not that. Erm...

Just that time with the conductor.

Never felt as if I could speak to you.

Erm... but now I have.

Well, you know...

But really... it's him you should be thanking.

[train approaches]

[brakes squeal]

[announcer] The train at platform one...

Thanks for helping me the other day.

No, it's all right. I know what it's like.

Yeah, yeah, I got chucked off a bus once.

-[young man] Did you? -Right outside Liverpool.

I was trying to get back and they kicked me off.

-So... -[young man] Cheers.

Yeah. Yeah.

-Morning, cowboy. -Hello.

I think they're expecting an update.

Er...

Morning, folks.

Hello.

Just, er, to let you know

that the inaugural Langton Line Christmas party

will be on the evening of the 22nd,

if that suits everyone?

[quiet muttering]

Oh, er, and...

Well, maybe a show of hands might be helpful.

Just...

Yeah.

-Oh! Yes! -Hmm!

It's a start.

And intimate is... is good.

And if anyone changes their mind

or wants to help...

Everything's sorted apart from the food.

And the drinks and the music and the venue.

So, erm...

Yeah, well, if you've any suggestions,

you'll find me in my office here.

C35. Aisle.

Erm...

Good. Thank you very much.

[whispers] That was great.

-Can we not go? -Are you serious?

-Yeah. -Look at them.

Pensioners and lunatics.

Yeah.

Let's just stay at home watching telly instead

with your mum and brother, because we never do that.

[he sighs]

What are you doing for Christmas?

Are you going to family or...?

No. Er... not this year. No.

I'll go down the community centre, yeah.

They do a good lunch there.

Yeah.

It's just me and Mum.

We get one of those giant turkey drumsticks.

Ooh, a giant drumstick. Very nice. Hmm.

-Does us fine. -Hmm.

Do you not fancy it?

The... the party?

The fella must have a screw loose.

[both chuckle]

I went to a Christmas party once.

In the Savoy Hotel. Hmm.

They had reindeer and snow falling in the ballroom.

What a night.

I was your age. About. Yeah.

There were these girls there.

Polished, fine, handsome women.

One of them, Deborah Swan, asked me to tea at her house.

-Did you go? -I did.

And we had tea, cakes, then champagne.

Christmas, New Year,

and she kicked me out on the 3rd of January.

We were married six months later.

It's hard to imagine an old man was once a young man, isn't it?

[Emma] What are you asking Santa for this year?

Erm... last year I got this bottle of cologne

-that had been on the Titanic. -[chuckles]

Did hint fairly heavily for a toasted sandwich maker.

-Hmm, that's nice. -Hmm.

Amanda loves presents.

She has this thing about getting everyone

something they would never have thought of.

-Your wife? -Girlfriend.

-Ah. -Yeah.

She has a list of... of what she'd like.

-Hmm. -So...

Well, at least you can't get it wrong.

That's true. And she does do

this really rather brilliant open-mouthed surprised face

when she opens it.

A bit like the face I make when I pay for them.

You should go off-list this year.

Oh, I don't know about that.

No, go on. What would you get her?

Maybe a chicken.

Frozen or...?

[chuckles] No! For the garden. For eggs.

-Like a hen? -Yeah.

Well, that... that's lovely.

Simon's always been a... vouchers man.

So there's a Mr. Chicago?

[chuckles]

Which is great.

You know, at least that way, I get to...

[both] Choose.

Yeah, what I really want, so... that's nice.

It's a shit present.

[sighs]

I should get back to my seat.

-I'm sorry. -No, it's OK.

-I shouldn't have. -It's fine.

Erm, you need to get a pair.

If you get a hen.

They get lonely.

[Paul hums]

Lunch?

Yeah. Let's go.

Emma works in this place, One Bell. We could try that.

What, that woman who gets your train?

-You keep banging on about her. -No, I don't.

To be honest, I think...

I think it feels a little bit disloyal.

Jesus Christ Almighty, Paul.

She's just someone I get the train with.

I'm talking about Tarek's falafel van.

That's our Tuesday go-to.

I'll be one second.

-You're all embarrassed. -I'm not.

Hi, there. Adam.

It's, er...

Yes, it's, erm...

-Dean. -Dean.

-Paul, Dean. -Hi. Hello.

-So are you boys on lunch, then? -Yeah.

I've had mine.

-We should... -When you said about helping,

I thought if you need, like, an invite-type thing, erm...

I made this this morning.

It's a bit rough, but...

Take it away and maybe, er...

[chuckles] You probably weren't thinking.

Thanks.

I'll get back.

So that's the quality of your guests right there, is it?

Well, I hope he's not sitting next to Elton and David.

-Is this for table six? -Yeah.

Is that train guy?

-Risotto? -Oh, yeah.

-Yeah? -Thank you.

There you go. Enjoy.

-That was very, very good. -That was fantastic, Emma.

I'm a meal-deal kind of guy, so I know what I'm talking about.

-Thank you. -This place is amazing.

I assume you've bumped a few folks

-and booked us in for the 22nd? -Sorry.

Oh... Here. We bumped into Dean.

-Dean? -The lad who forgot his ticket.

Ah. Sci-fi dreamer.

Said he's done an invitation for the party.

[Emma] OK.

Wow.

It's beautiful.

Unbelievable.

How is my day? What is wrong with this guy?

-Who'd have thought? -I know.

You have no idea what people are like.

-Look at you. -Oh, God. What about me?

You're always on your phone.

Then the other day,

when you stood up and made that announcement.

It surprised me.

You surprised me.

I'm sorry about this morning.

It's OK. You're right. It's a shit present.

I think we might need to start hustling.

Otherwise it's just gonna be me, you and Picasso.

Emma was full of regrets, wasn't she?

Noticed you're a Jane Austen fan.

Have you now?

[Adam] Don't be like her.

-This is about your party. -[chuckles]

You don't have to stay long.

OK, we're in.

-Are we now? -Yeah. Why not?

The boy's a smart one.

Remember that Christmas when the boys were tiny?

Hmm.

Fay cooked the turkey the night before.

What?

Everyone's using the gas at the same time on Christmas Day.

-I don't like to risk it. -[all laugh]

-Anyway... -Did it on Christmas Eve.

Then my other half comes barreling home at midnight,

three sheets to the wind,

helps himself to a leg of turkey.

Oh, no!

I had to tell the kids it was a rescue turkey!

-It only had one leg. -[all laugh]

[clears throat] My, erm...

My partner does this thing, erm...

Every year she puts an envelope

on the mantelpiece on December the 1st

and I open it on Christmas Day.

What's in it?

It's empty.

[clears throat]

Years ago, we were in a supermarket on Christmas Eve,

and there was this old lady buying a turkey dinner for one

and a mini Christmas pudding.

And when it went through the till,

she didn't have enough for the pudding.

-Oh. -Had to put it back.

And she looked absolutely shattered.

So Sally helped her with her trolley

and slipped a £20 note in with her shopping.

-Sweet. -Yeah.

She joked that she had it to put in my card.

So every year she's found someone or some cause and...

given them something.

Hmm.

Meanwhile, I get the empty envelope.

[chuckles]

[chuckles]

Mind you, how do you know?

I mean, that she actually does it? [chuckles]

Cos it's Sally.

[announcer] The train at platform...

Andy? Andy!

Andy!

-Adam. -Adam.

Er, I was talking to my PA about this party nonsense.

She suggested we let you use

one of the venues we've just acquired.

If you're looking for a place to hold it.

-Really? -Yeah. Come and take a look.

-Wow. -Er, they've closed it again.

Thanks.

[keyboard clicks]

[text alert]

[text alert]

All right, son.

Forty-minute delay.

Oh, bastards!

-Fancy a drink? -Yeah.

Come on.

[announcer] This is a security message...

-Cheers. -There you go. It's all right.

-It's still hot, look. -Yeah, lovely.

It's great, this.

I got this for my grandson.

-Market? -Yeah, yeah.

Quality.

Yeah, I was pleased with it, aye.

Hey...

-[siren wails] -[chuckles]

-That's all right, that. -Yeah.

[siren stops]

So... how old is he?

Er... he'll be 12 now.

Isn't it a bit young for him?

Forget that.

-It's great. -Yeah.

[Adam] Where are we off to, then?

[Emma] Wait until we get there!

[Adam] Oh, all right! What are you doing for the big day?

[Emma] I'm on my own this year. Simon's stuck out there.

But I've got figs, a goose,

a bottle of Talisker malt whisky.

I'm gonna put dinner on and watch Die Hardin my pajamas.

I haven't told anyone I'm on my own.

Why not?

I don't want to get invited anywhere.

Wow. I'd love to meet your family.

[chuckles] No. No, they're lovely.

It's just... with moving,

I'm kind of looking forward to having the day to myself.

Cook what I like. Do what I want, you know.

You don't wanna spend it with friends?

Most of them have moved away

and we don't really see each other.

You know what it's like. How about you?

Amanda's booked us a table at Claridge's.

Wow. Very swanky.

There is nothing swankier for a pair of swankers.

Turkey foam and Brussels sprout spritzers.

-Is that your thing? -Apparently.

Oh, any luck finding a venue?

I called a few places. Well, 32, actually.

It's an absolute nightmare.

No wonder Mary and Joseph couldn't find a room at the inn.

Everywhere's completely booked for Christmas parties.

-I've got somewhere. -That's not funny.

You know that, right?

You'll see it tomorrow if you can make it.

Sure.

♪ It had to be you ♪

♪ Had to be you ♪

♪ It had to be you ♪

♪ Had to be you ♪

♪ I wandered around and finally found ♪

♪ Somebody who can make me be true ♪

♪ And make me be blue ♪

♪ And even be glad ♪

♪ Just to be sad ♪

♪ Thinking of you ♪

♪ Some others I've seen ♪

♪ Some others I've seen ♪

♪ Might never be mean... ♪

-They're really good. -Aren't they?

I got talking to Suzy.

I thought they could be good for the party.

You're not the only one who's been hustling.

Hmm.

♪ With all your faults, I love you still ♪

♪ It had to be you, wonderful you♪

♪ It had to be you, wonderful you ♪

♪ It had to be you, wonderful you ♪

♪ It had to be you ♪

[applause]

[Suzy] Yeah, we'd love to do it.

[man] Well, we hadn't actually decided...

[Suzy] Hey! Ignore him. We'll do it. And no fee.

I love a Christmas party!

-Go and get us a round. -Let me.

-It's OK. They comp us here. -Please.

[Emma] Are you sure that's OK?

Yeah, he's just being a grinch. He's a big sweetheart, really.

You were brilliant, by the way.

Oh... thanks.

I love your ring. It's beautiful.

Er, I actually forget I'm wearing it.

-[chuckles] -Tiffany's?

Hmm, no, Michael got it in a toy shop for me on our first date.

Told me it would keep me going until he got me a proper one.

You two are such a cute couple.

-Er... -Thanks.

People tell us that all the time.

[Suzy] Aw, I'm not surprised.

Your kids will be gorgeous.

Yeah, we are planning on six.

-Wow, really? -Hmm.

-No. -No, we're not.

-[laughs nervously] -[Adam] No.

-We're not actually... -We're not with...

-Oh, my God. I'm so sorry. -No. Yeah.

We're just train buddies.

Your kids would still be gorgeous.

Yeah.

[Emma] It's a bit old-fashioned but I like being walked home.

-Is this you? -[chuckles]

[Emma] That's me.

East of England Girls' Figure Skating Champion.

-Two years running. -Wow.

-[chuckles] -Nearest I got to winter sports

was skidding down the railway cuttings on a tea tray

-if we got a bit of slush. -I used to do that.

I had this Charles and Diana royal wedding beer tray.

It really flew. My coach found out about it.

Made my dad throw it away in case I got injured.

Hated her after that.

-So you were really good. -Yeah, I was.

And then I used to fall in competitions on purpose

just to piss her off.

-What? -Always at the last moment.

And enough to drop out of the medals.

And then I discovered Jagerbombs and boys

and chucked it all in.

Wow. That's a really inspirational story.

You should go around schools with it.

It wasn't fun anymore.

You know, if something isn't fun, what's the point?

[Adam] The Christmas party is fast approaching.

Anyone else wanna put their name down?

There's a band and everything.

Or if anyone can help with decorations or food or...

Anything.

But no pressure. It's got to be fun.

If it isn't fun, then what's the point?

Listen, I might be able to help get the drinks sorted.

Really?

Just... you're hardly turning down help, are you?

Too right we're not.

-I'll catch you when we get in. -Great.

Thank you.

Maybe it is a bit young.

The thing is, I don't know what to get him.

I haven't seen him since he was a baby.

I get him a present every year.

Just in case. Yeah...

I wasn't a good dad.

Oh, I was doing OK. You know, successful and that.

Then it all went wrong.

Started drinking.

A lot.

Bloody... cliché I was.

Debbie left, took my boy

and he grew up being told his dad didn't love him.

I got a Christmas card one day

with a picture of a... of a baby in it.

That was the first time I knew I had a grandson.

I turned up on Christmas Day

loaded up with presents, you know.

I'd had a few to settle my nerves.

It was... not a good idea.

[mutters] I didn't make it into the house.

Patrick took one look at me and...

[mutters]

And you haven't seen your grandson since?

No. No, I gave up the drink after that. Yeah.

Ooh.

I moved down here to be close to 'em.

I tried talking to my daughter-in-law

when Patrick was out, but, er...

But it seems that was worse,

going behind his back, so, you know...

Yeah. Hmm.

Do you think they'll take it back?

If they don't, I'll, erm... I'll buy it off you.

My cousin will go mad for that.

All right. Hmm.

And I've persuaded him to come.

But he's used to a certain level of Christmas party, so...

It better be good.

[City man] This is the place.

Venue sorted, I think you'll find.

Just taken it on, actually.

Thinking of using it for our corporate dos and the like.

Reckon it'll work?

Well, I was hoping for elegant and sophisticated,

but I don't mind slumming it. Emma?

Don't let him have it, Jonathan.

[Jonathan] No, no, no. Least we can do.

We're really big on charity stuff.

Is that what we are?

I shall book it in. Seriously, you don't want to know

how much we spent acquiring this place.

Still, knocked a quarter of a million off our corporation tax.

Really?

[Jonathan] James, you old dog! Yes!

I want to book our entertainment space for a little soirée.

Ooh, shit. Yeah, sorry, mate.

I meant to send you that earlier.

-What do you reckon? -[Emma] It's nice.

[Adam] Yeah.

-Big. -Very big.

[Adam] All right, let's get the drinks sorted!

-[Emma] Ooh! -Try not to get too pissed up.

[Emma chuckles]

[bell rings]

Try this. I'm sure you don't need to know

about its tone or its body or its length.

-[Adam] I'll only get jealous. -[chuckles]

Mmm. Very tasty.

You can have a few cases of this.

On me. Sally's favourite.

["Once in Royal David's City" plays]

[Emma] Thank you.

-[exhales] Ooh! -That was a good day.

We're getting there.

Yeah.

The black one looks great.

-[music over headphones] -Adam?

[turns music down]

I was talking to our hospitality guy last night.

I need to calm him down a bit.

It's gonna be a quiet affair, right?

More of a reception than a...

-rave. -[chuckles]

So far, there are only eight of us, so I don't think anyone

will be taking a seven-iron to the glassware.

Great.

Don't worry, it's fine.

-It's such a good idea. -No, it isn't. No.

Actually, Jonathan, erm...

I've been thinking about it. I think we'll pass on the venue.

-Oh? -Yeah.

I just worry.

It's so lovely and Emma will end up dancing on the bar

and punching the air to "Mr. Brightside"

and I'll be all like, "Argh! Mind the veneer."

Maybe save it for our next one.

Oh, honestly, forget I mentioned it.

-It's fine. -I have somewhere else lined up.

-Thanks, though. -Oh. Yeah. Whatever you think.

You're in business, right?

Yeah, last time I looked.

So, Michael's got this interview

for a really big finance company.

And maybe you can give him a few tips.

Er, Suzy, it's OK.

[Suzy] He's actually got

a really brilliant proposal for it.

You wanna pitch it to me?

-Not... not really. -Go on.

He might be able to help.

Well, I have this theory about plastic supermarket bags.

Everyone thinks it was environmental lobbying

that got the supermarkets to ditch 'em.

But I reckon it was some maverick guy on the inside.

He's ahead of the game.

He knows single-use plastic is on the way out,

but he can make it profitable. He goes to his boss and says,

"Look, we need to stop giving away plastic bags."

"So let's show our customers our big green balls

and tell 'em to bring their own bags."

"We look responsible and we save a small fortune."

"But then, the really clever bit."

"We bide our time. Then after a few weeks,

when everyone's forgetting their bags,

we sell 'em."

"We sell them something we used to give away for free."

"A Bag For Life, madam, like you bought last week."

Very good.

Don't they give the money to charity?

The profit, yes, but not the capital cost.

Hmm. So it's a proposal for the retail sector?

That's just the catchy example to introduce the premise.

It's about culture change within business.

How maximising profit and a green agenda

are not mutually exclusive.

It's not the worst idea I've ever heard.

Thanks.

-You'll be after my job next. -[chuckles]

Thank you. Tickets and railcards, please.

[overlapping chatter]

[beeping]

-Michael's a smart cookie. -Yeah, unlike you.

Why'd you do that? Cancel the room?

The party's in four days, Adam.

When he mentioned it reduced their tax bill...

I know you were thinking it too.

It's not the right place. Not for what we're doing.

Tiny protests.

Why did I do that? It's in four days.

Hm-hmm. I'll pop by your office after work.

We'll sort it.

["It's Christmas Time"]

♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

♪ Baby, it's Christmas time ♪

♪ Lights shining, ooh, lights shining ♪

♪ So much joy ♪

♪ Baby, it's Christmas time ♪

[choir] ♪ Fa la la la la, la la la la ♪

If you get any cancellations, bell me back, will you?

[mimics gunshot]

Cheers, boss.

[groans] There's nowhere available.

Did you win this?

I did. From the Dry Cleaning Association Media Awards.

-Wow. -Hmm.

Third place in the Best Print category.

Let's just call Jonathan and see if his place is still free.

-It's the easiest thing. -Is that you sorting it?

Don't take any notice of me.

No. It's just... That's what I've always gone for.

The easiest thing. Here.

And I can't help but take notice of you.

[chuckles]

Is that a projector?

Yeah. Got loads of old movies.

We all used to sit up here at night and watch 'em.

Can I see?

The motor's burned out, so it just sits there.

It's basically a metaphor for my whole career.

Why don't we just do it here? The party?

I don't think so. They'll be expecting more

than me just pushing the desks against the wall.

Hmm.

-What's out there? -Come. I'll show you.

-Beautiful. -Yeah.

It never really lays anymore, though.

[woman nearby] No! [laughs]

Hmm.

Do you ever get the feeling like you're not really living?

You know, like, your life's just about to begin.

All the time.

You know I bought my house?

Our village has one of the best schools in the country.

Hmm. You wanna have kids?

Some people want to make it onto the board.

Some people want to have their own company. Me?

I want to have a kickabout.

Amanda feels the same?

And you don't want to talk about it.

It's OK. It's none of my business.

No, I'd only bore you.

And you've got a whole new life to go and do.

[sirens]

[indistinct chatter, laughter]

[indistinct chatter]

When I was about 15,

I really wanted this pair of trainers for Christmas.

Mum found some at the market, but with four stripes.

-Oh, that's terrible. -Yeah.

She might as well have bullied me herself!

You got your mum's present yet?

I did her a drawing. Erm...

I'd like to get her something really good, though.

She never gets anything.

After I pay rent and my season ticket, I'm skint.

I got a great present once.

Paul McCartney gave me his jacket

from the Sgt. Pepper'scover.

-What did you get him? -Pound of sirloin.

Poor fella hadn't had a steak in years.

-[chuckles] -Talking of which...

why don't you come for your tea tonight?

I've got a pie that would be grand for both of us.

-What kind of pie? -Steak and kidney.

-You thinking mash? -Mash and peas.

-Sounds good. -Great.

-Snowball? -Yeah.

[train clatters]

So, I'll see you later for tea, then?

All right, son.

-What time do you want me round? -Seven?

Yeah. Sounds good.

I've got to rush off, but I'll see you later.

All right.

[text alert]

You know that outside chance of a cancellation?

Not happening.

Oh, it was a ridiculous idea anyway.

I'm such a sentimental dick.

[sighs]

I think we should do it here.

It's about the people.

Think about it. We could have the band over there.

The bar in the corner. Put up some tinsel.

It'll be magical.

Don't give up on it, Adam.

-[Amanda] Ho, ho, ho! -Amanda!

Oh. Is this the planning committee?

[both] Erm...

-Amanda Franklin. -Oh. Sorry.

-Hi. -Hi.

-Yeah, er, Amanda, this is... -You must be Emma.

Yes. Hi. Er...

He told me that he had a little helper.

-That's me. -Great.

Babe, it's my mother's thing tonight.

You haven't forgotten, have you?

Forgotten? Who, spaghetti brains over here?

Course I have. Er...

-[clicks fingers] -I have a shirt here somewhere.

-It's nice to meet you. -Yes. Merry Christmas.

You, too.

Hope you get a chicken.

[Adam] Ah. I say I forgot.

I didn't forget as such. I just didn't remember.

All right.

Er...

I-I-I don't get many visitors,

so I never quite get round to sorting the place, you know?

Er...

Yeah, right, erm... Erm...

Yeah, you, er...

Make yourself at home. I'll get the dinner on.

Thanks.

Er, it's clean.

I know there's a bit of mess,

but, you know, it... it is clean.

-[Dean] Sure. -Right.

Aye, yeah.

[sighs]

[glass clink]

[exhales]

Wow.

I've got Hawaiian crush or American cream soda.

In fact, you have the cream soda. You're the guest.

That's you?

[chuckles]

I've been doing a lot in crypto.

I'm actually going big in the non-fungible token space.

Is that the really dull tent at Glastonbury?

NTFs not your bag, Adam? Come on. You're an arty type.

Well, I prefer my art fungible. Like Cezanne's apples.

[laughs] Love those.

Now Hero's announced he wants to board like his brothers.

We need the money. Don't have kids.

School fees these days are ridiculous.

Tim!

[Adam] You don't actually need to pay.

But if you can afford it,

wouldn't you want the best for your kids?

Anyway, I don't want kids.

-Oh. -Well, you know.

You say that, but...

Oh. You'll have to excuse Adam.

Telling me what I think is his favourite thing to do!

[chuckles]

You know, I was at the top of my game for about five years.

Most with Liverpool.

We won the European Cup in '78, the League the next year

and then the European Cup again in '81.

-You got the medals? -I don't bother with 'em.

Not anymore.

[sighs] Hmm.

Can Isee 'em?

Oh.

Erm...

It's been years since I looked at 'em.

Hmm.

Feels like I was someone else. [chuckles]

Yeah.

Hey, what a night that was, my boy.

[chuckles]

We thumped Real Madrid in Paris.

Had a few after the game.

I threw up in Kenny Dalglish's hat!

-[both laugh] -Great times!

These must be worth a fortune.

Yeah.

We all looked sharp, you know. All of us.

Had the Savile Row suits. Uptown at the weekend.

I was a shoo-in for the England team.

Then I got injured and that was it.

Career over in a couple of seconds.

-Really? -Yeah. [sighs]

This Tottenham striker was winding me up, you know.

I was always a bit impetuous.

That's what some commentator used to say.

I went in to take him out.

It was me that ended up with a broken leg.

-No. -Yeah. That was it.

Plummeted like a brick.

Woke up one morning with yet another hangover

and my life all gone. Foof!

Yeah. A few snaps,

a few baubles.

That's it.

Hey...

Thanks for coming over, Dean.

-It's all right. Quality pie. -[chuckles]

Hey, have you got some threads sorted for the party?

Er, not really. Just my work shirt.

You can borrow something. Hold on.

-[Dean] Ray, it's fine. -Wait till you see this.

[soft thudding]

[zip unfastens]

You know what this is, don't you?

[chuckles]

-[Adam] Amanda, er... -[Amanda] Yeah?

[Adam sighs] Oh, boy. Listen, I've been thinking.

Since I moved out of town,

it feels like we hardly see each other.

We're busy. Like... people are busy.

We don't make the time, though, do we?

It's easy and...

Maybe that's fine. Maybe that suits us.

We're not...

making demands on each other all the time.

Yeah.

I always thought that was a good thing.

But what if it isn't?

[sighs]

I can't do this anymore.

OK.

Is there someone else?

There's always someone else.

Maybe I'm someone else now.

Right, well, I'm still the same girl

that you proposed to on the night you met me.

I was tying my lace.

[both laugh]

You arethe same girl.

Yeah. Come here.

[sighs]

[car door shuts]

I couldn't believe it when they asked me

to come back for some dinner thing.

Still, made them fly me first class.

And you get to see me.

And I get to see you.

And we can spend Christmas together.

Yeah, I mean, they couldn't give me a flight until Boxing Day,

so I'm missing the damn Christmas Eve party.

Still, you are going to love this dinner.

They spent an absolute fortune.

-When is it? -Erm, 22nd, I think.

-[Emma] I've got something. -What?

No, no! They've flown me in for this, Emma. We need to be there.

[sighs] That's the night of the train party.

Well, you're never gonna see those people again,

so what's the point? Hmm?

-I know, but it's... -Hey, hey. Look.

It's gonna be fun. All right? I promise you.

[sighs]

Here we go. It's got all the details on there.

Oh, thanks!

But you know them anyway. Here you go. And for you.

All the details are on the card.

Work of our very own Dean here.

-Thank you. -Hmm! You did this?

-Yeah. -[Adam] All right!

-Don't sound so surprised. -Thanks.

And I've managed to secure an exclusive warehouse venue

-just by the station. -[Fay] That's lovely, Dean!

-Thank you! -Hmm.

How are you? Are you OK?

I'm very well, thank you.

You're a very talented young man.

-[manager] Hi. -[Paul] A table for two, please.

[manager] Great. Are you happy to sit at the bar?

[Adam] Yeah.

These two? Zola will take your order in a second, OK?

You're really not getting any better at this cooking lark.

Simon's here.

-Oh. -Yeah, he came in last night.

-Great. -Hmm. Yeah.

So you can... spend Christmas together.

Yeah.

Emma, what do you think of both of these?

What are they?

We just need a contemporary graphic

for a foot cream campaign we're doing.

So, you know, feet and cream kind of thing.

-Hi, Emma. -Hey, Dean.

I've got your, er...

-They worked out great. -Thank you, Dean.

-You all right? -Hi, guys.

-What's this? -It's a campaign we're doing.

Oh. Andgel. I thought it said angel.

I like angels.

-You can draw, right, Dean? -I do a bit.

He's done one invitation

and you're making out like he's Matisse.

He's probably just a kid with an art GCSE.

He might not be after three years at art school

-and a decade in the business. -Exactly!

Yeah, but his talent will be the same.

His craft might be better, his skills might be honed,

but talent is talent. Who knows how good he could be?

Your little "buy the world a Coke" campaign

-has really gone to your head. -[text alert]

Andreas. Are you seeing him now?

No. I'm batting away his advances, actually.

Why? Come on, Paul. Take a chance.

All right, I'll take a chance on your Dean,

but enough with the life-coaching, all right?

Deal.

Are you sure we don't need more stuff?

It's got to look magical. And I've convinced a few of them

to help out tomorrow night to get it done.

It's all coming together.

Yeah. Maybe it is.

I got you a present.

Come.

1978 MX60 drive motor.

And Dean had this made.

-What is it? -Have a look.

[projector whirs]

Wow.

Wow, indeed.

-[Adam] How did he...? -No idea.

He mumbled something about an animation app

and a mate in a lab.

Erm, we have to stick the ends together to make it loop.

Thank you.

It's...

Wow.

I can't come.

Simon has a dinner.

It's probably for the best.

[sighs]

It's funny how you think you know what you're doing in life.

This party...

I thought I wanted to get everyone on the train

to be friends.

I thought it'd be a good thing to do.

Maybe I just wanted to hang out with you.

[projector stops]

[gasps] I can't do this.

I'm moving to Chicago.

All my stuff is in boxes.

I think you're like me, Emma.

I think you're lost.

I really do.

I'm not lost.

But thank you for judging me.

You know, you really need

to sort your own shit out first, Adam.

Enjoy your party.

Right.

Bastard!

Where's Emma?

Dunno. Where's Dean?

Dunno.

Michael, how did your interview go?

-Oh. Oh, yeah? -[Michael] Erm...

-I didn't get it. -[Fay] Aw.

Gutted, to be honest.

That's a shame.

Maybe your idea needed a bit more work.

Er, the idea was sound. It wasn't that.

I know, it's tough out there. My CEO's about your age.

He's firing people left, right and centre.

Got everyone writing proposals to see who's worth keeping.

-You done one? -Avoided the cull, thankfully.

-[Michael] You two all right? -Hmm?

Like proper bah humbug, the pair of you.

Come on, you've got a big gig tomorrow.

You should have a spring in your step.

-Yeah. -I know there's a danger

that there will be more band members than guests.

[laughter]

You might wanna do a quick shoutout.

Actually, erm...

This is the last shoutout.

You'll all be, er... delighted to hear

that the inaugural Langton Line Christmas party

is cancelled.

-[Jonathan] What? -Why?

Tonight's decoration volunteers stand down.

And I'll drop off the booze. It ain't happening.

-Come on! -[Adam] We've dodged a bullet.

-What? -Why?

And in the New Year, we can all go back to...

well, ignoring each other, you know.

Generally being satisfied with our lives,

instead of scratching around...

dreaming dreams we never get round to,

starting things we never finish, and... looking for happiness

in places where we don't belong and aren't welcome.

Hear, hear.

Yeah, I'm... I'm sorry to have wasted your time.

We've done so many rehearsals.

You've been rehearsing?

We've been rehearsing the whole time.

-All the numbers. -Wait, wait, wait. Is that it?

Yeah, come on, Adam.

After all you've done, you're just gonna like...?

It's OK. You heard him.

[sighs]

By the way, Michael, I've been meaning to ask,

did you give your mum that recipe?

Er... ooh, yes. Yeah. She says thanks.

Jonathan, Fay's boys can do your electrics next week.

Is Tuesday OK?

Perfect. Thanks, Fay. Ooh, er, no.

Wait a minute. I might have something on Tuesday.

Have you forgotten about that sync app I told you about?

No, I didn't, and I have it right here.

Thank you. Yeah.

Linda, I've got the money for the wine.

No, don't be daft. I told you, they're just bin ends.

Nobody needs to pay for them.

Hmm! Tuesday's great. You know, this actually works, Mikey!

Of course it does, bro.

-[Suzy laughs] -See?

You did this.

OK, we're not at each other's house every night,

but... we have something.

A recipe isn't much and a little help ain't everything,

but it's... it's something.

Thanks.

[Paul] Well, I hate to say it, but the kid's done a good job.

-What do you think? -[Adam] It's great work.

-Both of you. -[phone rings]

A phone call? Am I buying a hat?

-[tuts] -[chuckles]

Hello?

I hear you've cancelled.

Yeah. Just...

Well, your projection was amazing.

-Thank you. -Emma's idea.

Just ran out of time.

Sorry.

Me, too.

[pats Dean on back]

[quiet music]

[Linda] One, two, three, four,

five... six, seven.

Are you sure about this, Adam?

You weren't gonna come anyway, were you?

I lost Sally... in April.

And it's really hard.

We loved Christmas.

So I'm just gonna let it pass me by,

like a float in a parade.

And I wouldn't have been much company, anyway.

Well... it's very Christmassy in here.

All the cards and the music.

So I'm not buying that...

pass-me-by, parade-float rubbish.

What are you, Barbra Streisand?

-[sniffles, chuckles] -[chuckles]

But it must be really tough.

She looks at you...

the way I used to look at Sally.

And it might not be.

But it could be everything.

And if it is, you've got to go for it.

You really do.

You are allowed to be happy, you know.

How did you know about Sally?

Sat on her bench.

Read the little plaque.

Oh, she loved skiving! [chuckles]

-Her and me both. -[both laugh]

[manager] Can you push the cheese? And that's all fine.

Oh, can you take the card machine to table eight?

Yeah, no problem.

-Hiya. Is Emma about? -Er, you've missed her.

Do you know when she's back in?

When she comes home and begs me for her job back.

Sorry. I should really get on with this.

[Adam] Of course.

Yeah, sorry. Merry Christmas.

[text alert]

[phone beeps]

I don't think he's coming in today.

[keyboard clicks]

[phone rings]

[groans]

-You all right, Michael? -Hey, Adam.

Erm, we've got a big gig tonight,

and I left my guitar in your office.

Do you mind if I swing by at seven to get it?

Er...

Yes, sounds good. I will see you there.

Thanks, Adam. I'll see you.

-[phone clatters on table] -[groans]

[announcer] The train at platform one

is the 17:45 service to London Liverpool Street.

[keys rattle]

-[switch clicks] -[cheering]

[music starts]

Just 'cos you weren't coming doesn't mean we weren't.

Thank you.

Thank you.

[Adam] Hey!

What are you doing here?

I just thought I'd show Miranda what she could have won.

I'm sorry if I was a moaning Minnie before,

but when I saw what this lot did...

I can't believe you did all this.

Neither can I. Hi!

Ah!

♪ Joy to the world, the Saviour reigns ♪

♪ Let men their songs employ ♪

♪ While fields and floods ♪

♪ Rocks, hills and plains ♪

♪ Repeat the sounding joy ♪

♪ Repeat the sounding joy ♪

♪ Repeat, repeat the sounding joy ♪

[cheering]

Right, you lot!

Anyone wanting to have a go on Santa's knee, get a move on.

I'm supposed to be doing the 22:30 to Ipswich.

-[song ends] -[cheering]

[new song starts]

♪ Deck the halls with boughs of holly... ♪

-[Adam] Hey, Dean! -Hi.

-[Adam] Good jacket. Awesome! -♪ Tis the season to be jolly ♪

You all right?

You little bastard!

You bastard! [grunts]

-[gasps] -[music stops]

Did you think I'd not notice? Did you? Hey? Hey?

After I gave you my hospitality.

That pie would have done me for two nights!

[Adam] Whoa. Ray! Cool your jets there, Ray.

-[Ray] Thieving... -Cool your jets.

What's going on?

You better ask this thieving little hooligan!

He stole my medals.

He stole 'em! He asked to see 'em!

He bloody cased the joint and then he took 'em!

[Adam] Whoa! OK.

Come on. Come on.

Right, come on. Let's get you up.

Let's get you up.

-Get off! -All right. Leave him. Come on.

-Let's sit you down. -He took 'em.

[breathes heavily]

[Adam] What's going on, Ray?

[Ray] Well, I...

I used to play a bit.

Football.

I wassomeone.

Not this old man.

This lonely old git.

I was someone!

Like you, Adam. Like Michael there.

All I had left from all of it,

all of that, is a couple of medals.

He took 'em. He stole 'em.

Dean?

I borrowed 'em, Ray.

Yeah, borrowed them. Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

I thought they deserved looking after.

I thought you deserved looking after.

I did it for your grandson.

I think he'd prefer it to a fire engine.

No offence.

No, none taken.

I could come with you.

Drop it off Christmas Day.

Usually at a loose end after The Wizard of Oz.

Ray?

You're Ray Smythe?

You're the man!

That unbelievable Liverpool team

with King Kenny, Ray Kennedy, Phil Neal.

The one-footed bloody donkey.

[chuckles]

[distant siren]

-[laughter] -[loud dance music]

-Simon? -Yeah?

-Can I ask you something? -Sure.

Do you actually want to be with me?

Jesus, Emma, what is it that you want?

Not this.

[cheering]

[whooping]

I just wanted to thank you all for coming.

-Whoo! -[cheering]

That's for Emma, really.

She couldn't be here tonight, but, erm, all this...

It was her.

And you. All of you.

So, erm, thank you...

for keeping the faith when I jumped ship.

And, er...

A quick mention for Linda.

Er, before I had my midlife crisis yesterday,

we, er...

We all did an envelope.

-So... Red Cross. -Samaritans.

I put a bit towards my nephew's bike. Is that allowed?

[laughter]

[applause]

Er, thank you very much. I'll leave it to the pros.

[Michael] Nice one, Linda.

Now, this is a proper Christmas party.

-Had a punch-up. -[laughter]

Got our own celebrity guest.

And I've got a tenner on one of Little Mix there

being the first arse on the photocopier.

-[laughter] -Thanks, Adam.

I've met good people, but I'll be damned

if Adam's gonna be the only fruit loop here.

[clears throat]

Suzy... baby.

I sometimes think about what would have happened

if you hadn't smiled at me in the street that day.

[chuckles nervously]

And... I get scared.

I love you so much.

And this thing's been burning a hole in my pocket for weeks.

[gasping]

Suzy, my love, will you marry me?

[gasps]

-Yes! -[cheering]

[whooping]

[Michael] I think my fiancée deserves a number. Right, guys?

-[cheering] -Yes, yes, yes!

No, no. I really don't. I'm the backing singer.

-[whistles] -[cheering]

OK, fine, fine.

Fine.

Gosh. Erm...

I remember we broke up once, didn't we?

Not long after we met.

We broke up for what was it, like, two days?

-It was a weekend, so two days. -Yeah.

And I really, really felt awful.

[chuckles] But...

I'm really, really glad

that I will never feel like that ever again.

So... er, this will be the last time

you'll ever hear me sing this song.

-I love you. -I love you so much.

[all] Aw.

[music starts]

♪ What'll I do ♪

♪ When you ♪

♪ Are far away ♪

♪ And I'm so blue ♪

♪ What'll I do? ♪

♪ What'll I do? ♪

♪ When I am wondering who ♪

♪ Is kissing you ♪

♪ What'll I do? ♪

♪ What'll I do? ♪

♪ With just a photograph ♪

♪ To tell my troubles to?♪

Could have made an effort.

[Suzy] ♪ When I'm alone with only ♪

Well, if you'd told me you were coming, I would have.

♪ Dreams of you ♪

♪ That won't come true ♪

♪ What'll I do? ♪

♪ What'll I do? ♪

[cheering]

[whistles]

[cheering]

-[squeals] -[cheering]

♪ Christmas hasn't felt like Christmas ♪

♪ For a little while ♪

♪ But if you sit, we'll still end this ♪

♪ And you'll be sure to smile ♪

♪ Cos not too far up in the distance... ♪

I might wait until the weather's a bit better

before I move to Chicago.

Spring's supposed to be nice.

-Less windy. -Hmm.

Plus, I like it here.

-I got you a present. -Yeah?

-Close your eyes. -OK.

[glasses clink]

OK.

Talisker. That's your tipple, right?

-How did you know? -Well, you told me.

Thank you.

That's...

That's really sweet.

-Hi, there. -Hi.

-Sorry, I'm Dean. -Hi, Dean.

This is Ray. Erm...

I just wanted to drop this off for the boy.

-Thank you so much. -Sorry for interrupting.

-Thank you. -Have a good day.

-Merry Christmas. -Merry Christmas.

[Ray] Lovely.

-I reckon she'll like it. -Yeah.

Yeah, he'll probably get it in a minute, like.

[Dean] Yeah.

[Adam] Do you ever wonder who they really are?

The people down your street.

Those half-familiar faces in your local coffee shop.

Or whoever who sits opposite you on the train every day.

Ray?

[Adam] Aren't you just a little bit curious?

Might be amazing artist.

An undiscovered talent.

Or a true legend,

whose star simply hasn't been blessed.

-Hello. Hello, mate. -Hello.

-Hello, Stanley. -Hello, Granddad.

Hello.

-Hello! [laughs] -Thank you for having me.

[Adam] Maybe someone who's been having

a real tough time of it recently,

and could do with a friend.

Or maybe... if you're lucky,

someone you were always meant to find.

["Hark! The Herald Angels Sing"]

[Adam] Go on. Say hello.

♪ Coming off the snow ♪

♪ Coming off the snow ♪

♪ They're slugging it out at the station ♪

♪ Laden with last-minute bling ♪

♪ The poor get ignored and the stores are at war ♪

♪ And the registers guiltily ring ♪

♪ And a memory again takes over me ♪

♪ As I run for the overnight train ♪

♪ Got to go ♪

♪ Got to see my people again ♪

♪ Is your heart coming home ♪ this Christmas?

♪ Will we meet by the steps of old St Joe's? ♪

♪ Where your heart was so bright ♪

♪ In the darkness of that night ♪

♪ That it warmed us both against the cold ♪

♪ In the dark of the night ♪

♪ With your heart so aglow ♪

♪ I swear I saw it coming off the snow ♪

♪ Coming off the snow ♪

♪ Well, I've been round the world forget you ♪

♪ Too young to settle down ♪

♪ Had many a drunken Christmas lost ♪

♪ In every kind of town ♪

♪ But I can't deny the miracle ♪

♪ That night I kissed you, dear ♪

♪ Just tell me that you're coming back this year ♪

♪ Is your heart coming home this Christmas? ♪

♪ Will you meet by the steps of old St Joe's? ♪

♪ Where the bells softly chimed ♪

♪ As your lips found mine ♪

♪ In a kiss so bold ♪

♪ It cut right through the cold ♪

♪ With your eyes so alive ♪

♪ With your heart so aglow ♪

♪ I swear I saw it coming off the snow ♪

♪ I swear I saw it coming off the snow ♪

♪ I swear I saw it coming off the snow ♪