All language subtitles for The Great American Sex Scandal (1990) DVDRip

foreign

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[Applause]

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foreign

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foreign

process has been completed and the

following people have been selected as

jurors in case number

43324 State versus Sanford langefels

please stand as I call your name worth

Watkins

Watkins

stand up please

Ratner oh that's me Griffith

energy

great great great how guys great great

house key greyhowski dodsworth

carlucci yo burwald meat Beckman

report here tomorrow 7 30 a.m God

congratulations

Who the hell's Sanford legofost

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good

foreign

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's piano Concerto Number Four in G I

said kill the music or I'm gonna rip off

your head and plug it in somewhere else

[Music]

Trevor sweetie wake up oh

I can hear myself ovulating oh baby I

think that's the Burrito Grande that we

had for dinner no it's ovulation I heard

about it on Oprah Trevor

these next few days are crucial if we're

serious about getting pregnant oh

all right oh it's all right oh yes hey

we did it once when I got home once

before dinner was after dinner even

during Nightline

isn't that serious isn't it

it's a start oh

Claire now just relax

[Music]

well

what do you think

you look just like Rocky Marciano look

killer I gotta run

look I paid for the whole night the deal

was dinner and dancing you ate like a

horse you danced like a mule and I'm out

of here

I start jury duty tomorrow you're a

hooker

oh yeah

then what's that make you some sorry sap

from Cleveland who wants to pay a woman

to listen to you fantasize about making

it in the produce section of the

supermarket never eating salad again

[Music]

Kevin Francine come on breakfast is

ready mom my cereal's all limp you put

too much milk in it use a straw and my

toast is all burnt and we'll talk to

your father he was supposed to fix the

toaster well I can't eat it this way it

makes me like nauseous what's the UTA on

that shirt look I'm gonna be late again

you ironed my skirt is that a crime

mother it's supposed to be wrinkled you

ruined it instead of an ironing my shirt

I can't find my shoes Mom oh they're in

the closet top shelf on the right what

are they doing in the closet

oh mercy

posters on the fritz there does charcoal

give you cancer no

where'd you put my sweats what am I

supposed to wear yeah yeah

yeah read for yourself nothing but rape

murder and Mayhem

we're all's going to hell in a hand

basket Judas

no one cares people don't talk to each

other there's no respect for learning

33 years a teacher and they tell me I'm

too old to continue

with a country full of illiterates mind

you

what's the point of living

are you still making pot roast honey

I sure hope so that's the first thing

I'm going to want when I see you

Brenner is handling the Mountain View

multiple stranglings Fosters

on top of the mayor's campaign

contribution scandal and some math the

Bateman is going to court on the legal

fost embezzlement case

playing to an empty house no doubt

someone's got to handle the dog meat

babe dues actually Lego fast is

interesting in order to pull off this

embezzlement he had to have moves like

Harry Houdini Samantha Lego Foster's a

loser just get in and out here

oh you gotta run I am taping down to you

today

so you wanted me to make it for an hour

I held out for two

okay so you can wear white I'm sure

honey no people don't expect any more

that you he's gonna have he's gonna have

a stroke I think just thinking about

yeah

I

Carl listen it can't wait to either lock

up the money now or the deal goes south

I think that's the Betsy what do you

mean how many guests honey where are we

getting married Chase Stadium Carl

here's how a conversion deal Works

listen to me it's a very political thing

especially when they have an historical

angle like these protesters are going to

exploit I guarantee honey white roses

pink red black roses are my favorite I

don't care sweetheart

yes October is very close I Carl we got

a Time problem I'm telling you get this

through your thick skull or no

sweetheart no no your skull is perfect I

love no your hat will fit fine honey

darling no Carl you're not darling you

never will be you're just a big

I'll call you about that I can't talk

[Music]

everybody holds a sign because they read

nicely on TV okay grab some petition

start hustling signatures I brought

Donuts iced tea I'm sorry about the

sugar but they're free

hello Danny

here's the pyramid we got the sidewalk

kill three grab a donut hey guys

hi hi you can't tell the players without

the program Okay so so your log line is

as hot as the weather's been it's murder

they are trying to kill a piece of our

past now your best camera angles across

the street there all right okay goodbye

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[Music]

you look so beautiful I'm starting to

fall in love with you

Eddie tell me the truth all this

crippling up you're doing is it really

for jury duty or you got a little

matinee on the side for me man it looks

mad at you know close I went they make a

statement statement the only statement

you need is you want red clam sauce or

white clam sauce get out of here I need

to spending the rest of my life in this

dump

Nick I know that we've been over

everything a thousand times and and I

know that you've got a game plan but

I've got to tell you I'm terrified

Sanford this is America you're innocent

until proven guilty well that's easy for

you to say Nick I'm the one on trial

well this isn't easy for me to say

embezzlement is a very serious crime

serious you want to talk serious

foreign

is in for multiple murders and rapes

okay crimes of passion and prison is

full of guys like him what if something

goes wrong and they send me up there's

nothing to put on the toilet seat I

could spend the rest of my life hovering

you're not going to prison the legal

system works we've got a very strong

case where right here

somewhere Carl if you can't borrow money

you can't make money if you can't make

money you can't spend money now we're

spending a lot of money on this deal and

you got to get us it right if you can't

get it here you get it offshore

understand how time is money and your

clock is broken hi hi excuse me my name

is Abby I'm trying to save one of the

city's most historic buildings I wonder

if I can have a signature on this

petition we need some of the young

people and I only have about 650 more

signatures that I need but I'm stuck in

this jewelry room and I really need them

now

thanks very much

you're a Taurus right Wall Street

Banker bull market

oh a cancer then

Sagittarius Libra Scorpio ah Capricorn

uh June 6. I was born June 6th Gemini

Gemini

impossible

no no way we're paying three points for

that money you crazy thanks well I'm

telling myself but I'm stuck here

I don't know maybe three days max yeah

yes I know we got a Time problem excuse

me no no excuse me I don't do petitions

thanks for the opportunity

and I'm just some babe on a bandwagon

Carl listen oh can I have everybody's

attention please

um Mercury is in retrograde and um the

iching says repetition of danger and

my feet are swelling

this is a horrible day to start a trial

if you ask me

well see I'm a psychic I know these

things

[Music]

okay Mr Joe okay it'll be fine

[Music]

all right

foreign

[Music]

listen can you hear them

Gear wheels of Justice slowly turning

as they have done for hundreds of years

and for this brief moment in time we are

privileged to be the cogs in the wheel

the power the great machine of common

law

and just for the record I'm the engineer

and when I say goes period

you mess with the machine you answer to

me this court is now in session

as you know ladies and gentlemen this

case is about embezzlement the

fraudulent appropriation of funds for

one's own use it's not exciting it's not

romantic it's not sexy but it is a crime

one which the defendant Sanford legal

fast committed exploiting his position

as an accountant at Cloud Industries the

defendant constructed a complex network

of bogus transactions and accounts which

he siphoned three million 244 522 for

his own use

the Staples show you what he did and how

he did it Dollar by Dollar Penny by

penny

as the district attorney so kindly

pointed out embezzlement is the

fraudulent appropriation of funds for

one's own use and yes it is a crime

a very serious one but it is a crime

that the defendant did not commit

nothing's happening around here I'm a

reporter not an alchemist I can't make

gold out of lead

or was that a threat Dennis

it is

after all the exclusives I've hustled

for you

or what about the Extraterrestrial cab

drivers the incest to assign these twins

the Park Avenue flasher Mr Lego fost is

responsible hard-working decent perhaps

even dull by today's standards so be it

that's who he is

hmm

he's never been arrested for anything

he's never even gotten a traffic ticket

he is an upstanding member of society

he's a man who we all could aspire to be

but one thing he most certainly is not

as a thief

it's a Grady would you approach the

bench please

79.99 marked down from 119.99

nice threads counselor

fashion note I think we should break for

lunch that is unless of course the

health department hasn't already closed

down the cafeteria

oh and people be advised to avoid the

chef's surprise du jour it's already

been indicted more than once for

manslaughter this court is adjourned

you're taking no sit down

hi

isn't jury duty fascinating hey I heard

the word I'm I'm an actress and this is

a wonderful opportunity to study

characters

you're a nice dresser what do you do

I'm uh

I'm an entrepreneur yeah

uh restaurants mainly

appearance is very very very important

in business

parents is important in life

of the veal please you have any idea

what they do to feel calves I have a

sinking feeling I'm about to find out

they torture those poor animals force

feed them cramps them

they fill them with chemicals I'm sorry

I don't touch them all I'm doing is

trying to have my lunch eat that and

you're in a compass

this is such fun I can't remember the

last time I ate and just fed one mouth

didn't have to do the dishes

what are you doing

well I was going to read your palm but

forget it you've done so many dishes the

lines are faded I never noticed that

what should I do get a dishwasher

crossword with a pen it must be very

good

I live Dangerously

and I love words

alone in little bunches and big fat

bouquets

where it's a beautiful thing oh I agree

I love to write poems mainly just for me

what thoughts can be private but words

need to be shared

and read your poems to someone someone

is special

there's got to be someone special for

such a beautiful woman

and clear honey we got at that time

let's go back to sleep

um

your honor of the state calls hope

Hathaway to the stand

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s

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[Applause]

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see happens

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[Applause]

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[Applause]

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[Applause]

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[Applause]

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do you swear to tell the truth

the whole truth

nothing but the truth God help me

so help you God

I absolutely do

excuse me

give us your name and occupation please

my name is Hope Hathaway and I work as a

secretary at trout Enterprises do you

know the defendant

yes I do

very well

how well Miss Hathaway

seems so sweet and shy

he's stopped by my desk and we talk

once or twice we had lunch in the office

and

watch General Hospital

he loved the Soaps

then one day he invited me to go bowling

bowling

yes he

wanted to go by his apartment

to pick up his ball his ball

[Laughter]

and what happened

we went to his apartment

this unbelievable place at Forsyth

Square 10 rooms antiques art all over

the walls

a mink

bedspread

but no bowling ball

looking back on

I don't think he ever intended to go

bowling

no

I don't suppose so

come on well

even with no bowling we had a wonderful

time

we uh we drank French champagne listened

to music danced

then we took a limo to dinner at

Rothschilds a limo

Sanford city owned two of them and after

dinner at one of the most exclusive

restaurants in the city the limo

took us back to the penthouse and

and we drank Cognac and talked and

yes Miss Hathaway

and and then

and then he made love to me

[Music]

on the mink bedspread

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he was like a wild animal

it was so

I've never

I just couldn't believe it

Dennis

[Music]

you've got exactly 10 seconds to

apologize for every squirrel that's a

liable this thing you've ever said or

thought about me

why because you sleazy a little bit hack

I've got the story of the century

foreign

[Music]

foreign

s with commitment this car is leased

because the numbers make sense what is

there about a gas guzzling Macho phallic

symbol it makes any sense oh bravo bravo

Antiquated pop feminist psychobabble

rhetoric designed to cover up your basic

inadequacies speaking of which does your

car make you feel any more like the man

you're still not sure you are

I know who I am sweetie

got a real good idea too

[Music]

thank you

what another beer babe

how about calling a waitress

you know there was a time when you would

have run

no crawled to get me a beer

times change

yeah

lots of things change

what happened to um Jerry from Ohio

he was very disappointed

chariot

I had a headache another headache

you're getting bad for business

sweetheart yeah

well I've been thinking about another

line of work

you were headaches

money now I'm here to be reimbursed

[Music]

I want my money

[Music]

let's go

[Music]

are you awake

forever

honey

and daddy have arranged the entire

honeymoon oh it's a complete surprise it

do everyone except my accountant but not

to worry junk bonds are financing the

whole thing oh good Robert stop talking

money she hates to talk about it love is

to spend it

that runs in the family though Phil

you've got your work cut out for you

hey and speaking of work

how about a toast the newest partner in

bets Babcock and Benjamin

well yes uh that's future partner

complete hey that Windsor Court Converse

has made you very attractive to our

board

well thank you but it's not a done deal

yet I'm still chasing financing and uh

some of the investors are getting a

little nervous about the demonstrations

it'll happen no doubt out about it

let's talk Beamers I've been thinking

about that BMW bets and I don't know I'm

not sure if it's for me you know what I

mean it's

[Laughter]

[Music]

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

my amazing

[Applause]

for me

[Applause]

foreign

[Music]

with your timing

maybe you should post your ETA no I

didn't mean that I meant your car you

need your timing adjusted

oh yeah I've been meaning to adjust that

like I wanted to say about yesterday

that uh I was a little out of line it

was a long day a lot of hassles

and uh bad timing

me too all right thanks okay

holy smokes look at this is there

anything you don't support probably

everything you do oh

well I used to have a car like this once

bumper stickers all over the place

really what happened

well my dad had it trashed no I mean

what happened to you to me

well you asked interesting questions

what about the answers

[Music]

[Applause]

[Applause]

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all rise

foreign

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not the price is right button it up

counselor can we please get this show on

the road

yes your honor

the state calls hope Hathaway to the

stand

[Applause]

foreign

[Music]

expensive restaurants exotic trips

the defendant sounds very generous

oh yes

yes he he was always buying me things

closed Rivers jewelry

he said he wanted to make me as happy as

I made him

these were in my Christmas stocking last

year

oh

lovely

tell us

did you ever inquire how the defendant

an accountant earning thirty thousand a

year could afford to live like an Arab

oil Sheikh

a lady never asks about money

I never suspected a thing

but then

I wasn't thinking very clearly

I don't know he did something to me that

I don't know

I don't know how to describe it

try Miss Hathaway what did he do

he had this incredible

yes this incredible

it's incredible

[Music]

power

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foreign

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about your emotional and sexual

relationship with the defendant he

sounded very

charismatic Mary and isn't it true you

felt powerless to resist him I don't

know I never tried isn't it possible

that you were under the defendant's

spell a spell woven by endearing words

and lavish gifts to exploit you and

serve his own sordid gain objection your

honor the prosecution is leading the

witness

foreign

[Music]

were you surprised when he was arrested

I was devastated

do you still believe he loved you

I don't know

[Music]

[Music]

[Applause]

all right

Adam and Eve committed the first crime

of passion

passion that's our Focus folks

ever since he bit into that apple and

Adam bit into her hello history has told

a steamy sagas of other star-crossed

lovers Anthony and Cleopatra Romeo and

Juliet

Jorge and women everywhere

[Applause]

and now we can add another couple to

that Pantheon of passion

Sanford and Hope

[Music]

their story will shock you perhaps

titillate you perhaps make you lose your

lunch

[Music]

this is unbelievable

Hope's had a longer run than Bonanza

yeah she's LED quite a life do we have

to relive every hour of it

Meanwhile my career is going up in phone

slip hey poor baby

hey I got a lousy idea

why don't you and I have lunch

no come on we can celebrate surviving

the jury from hell

on one condition we go dutch oh yes no I

wouldn't want you to have to pay for

everything

oops

I better take this call this could be

the difference between life and death as

I know it that's okay I got to make one

of those calls too

a long time no see baby

[Music]

I'm gonna get you count on it

thank God you're here a mouse

but we're days away from it to you why

are the Germans getting cold feet now

you bet they're running scared we've got

the permit the press releases are out

we've even got porta potties another

demonstration wins six shots that way

we'll make the 11 o'clock news how many

people are they expecting at least 500

we'll have a line that completely

surrounds the Windsor you get a press

release out ASAP something about the

Windsor is going to get the loving care

and attention it badly needs

their minds

you

you

can forget lunch

so exactly how long have you been as

secretary Miss Hathaway

nearly six years oh and you're good at

your job

I'm a professional it's difficult isn't

it there's a lot more to it than making

coffee and copies uh there's filing

phones typing dictation

take a letter would you please

two Mr White Rabbit 4242 Wonderland way

Wonderland England Dear Mr rabbit in

regards to your letter of the 12th

inquiring about a Mr Hatter I regret to

inform you that he has recently

experienced a mental breakdown in fact

he's gone completely mad

let's see what you've got

uh-huh

no shorthand huh

well I'll read what you've got anyway

to Mr wide rabbit 402 wonderful England

Dear Mr rabbit in regards mental mad

nice handwriting sure but I think a

stone Carver could take the station

faster than you Miss Hathaway a

secretary with years of experience

so

why did trout Industries hire you Miss

Hathaway

it certainly wasn't because of your

secretarial skills objection counselors

acting as though the witness was on

trial your honor I'm simply trying to

establish the validity of the witness I

mean if she isn't a secretary then what

is she

[Applause]

what

this afternoon's papers you better have

a look

trash fodder round up the jewelry we

need to have a little talk

[Applause]

the First Amendment calls this news

personally I have another name for this

but uh nobody's asking me

the Constitution also states that

everyone is entitled to a fair trial now

that I can buy

but any more of this type of news a fair

trial around here will be virtually

impossible

so tonight

I'm ordering that this jury becomes

sequestered

have a good night

[Music]

somebody died in this hotel

more than once I knew it

this looks exactly like the hotel lobby

and loves Sweet Revenge Francois rode

his stallion up four flights of burning

stairs to rescue his beloved Dominique

oh Francois was so

so

[Music]

Watkins and Eddie here there it is

if it was that Broad and the Red Top uh

Rita burwald and our female guests are

women Mr Martin not broads you don't see

him at 4am after a picture of margaritas

I know that broad from somewhere

oh this is funny yeah I'm right here too

hey you travel pretty light there huh oh

I lost the key to my home I think

locksmith is getting a key tomorrow

excuse me

pardon me

my room 342. no it's my room c342 and I

was here first oh great what do you want

to do have a sit in there or a forced

eviction

okay I'm sure he'll be happy to sort

this out for us hey

[Applause]

hippie

thank you

I have your room Mrs worth the

television

the lamb

bed

well

um

any problems at all please don't

hesitate to call me

I'd like you to think of me as your

personal Valley

and I don't speak I don't understand the

word

really

Clinic

Ally

[Music]

bonjour

petite brioche

[Music]

bonjour

[Music]

everybody I am getting a very strong

negative Karma reading for our Miss

Hathaway and the Cards Never Lie

well I'll tell you I think this whole

thing is strange I know business that's

what I do and it is very difficult to

steal that kind of money really I

thought businessmen were notoriously

good thieves well the good ones don't

get cut sweetie you should know why

don't you just clip okay who cares all I

want to do is get out of here while I'm

still young with a life to live

it's very sensitive very nice you know

there was a very similar situation in

this wonderful book Executive Suite did

anybody read it no no

well anyway

stunning executive secretary Yvette was

hired by the president to seduce his

partner so that he could blackmail him

and force him out of business

it worked

that's great

well so

well maybe Hope was hired to seduce

Sanford that would explain what hope saw

in legal post maybe he's just a really

nice man they do exist yes but those

guys don't get the hopes of the world

you know that no we we wait just a

minute now if hope did seduce Sanford

who put her up to it whoever stole the

money

and needed a Fall Guy to frame and the

Mystery person is who

who cares

anyone dumb enough to be arrested in the

first place should be executed or

exported

just don't have enough evidence we need

facts all right but at least we have a

start at a very good start

foreign

[Music]

I was serious about the pot roast honey

my time comes that's the first thing I

want

that and a piece of your lemon pie

the altitude doesn't affect meringue

does it

Indian summers a beautiful time of year

you should see the fall Garden we've

planted

[Music]

there's a few things I'd miss

a few things

[Music]

I came down to take a look at your

demonstration you attacked me attacked

you why would I do that yeah because

you're you're because I'm a man

oh we know how predictable men are don't

we lady you got a big problem yeah I've

got a problem don't both got a problem

it's a beautiful night with a million

dollar View and you're both wasting it

all screaming like La cats in the night

hey none of this lasts forever it's gone

like that

stop yelling start talking

maybe you'll both learn something

okay

hello

oh hi honey

no oh I know you got one coming down the

Chute now well there's nothing I can do

my hands are tight Claire

no

they won't let you near me

don't call the ACLU player

no not the president

oh I know honey

[Music]

foreign

[Music]

[Music]

room

well I I'd rather not say

are you your worst nightmare an honest

house that come on you're gonna take a

ride in the basement

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

I am so bored it's a room service menu

makes me nauseous my TV is broken my

room is totally suffocating Chef Lee

shut up what stop complaining

your young healthy pretty rich with your

whole life ahead of you you're lucky

do something constructive with your good

fortune and stop wasting your life you

only get one despite what Evelyn says

how dare you talk to me that way I'm old

I can finally be honest and I've earned

the right to complain

my wife and best friend died last year

and they told me I couldn't teach

that left me with a garden and not

nearly enough peace of mind

not much to show for a life

so

if you only got one how come you're

giving up on you're so soon

I seem to have lost the point

or just quit looking for it

possibly

but what's worse

to quit looking

or never start

all right why don't you defrost it first

let it melt

look I gotta go all right yeah good luck

Drew

Mr Lloyd I was expecting room service

I know

but I have taken the Liberty to

personally prepare yoroda

you know our staff here can sometimes be

so

um

so crap

I I trust your room is not too god-task

oh no no it's wonderful I feel just like

Anna in tears for my beloved you know

when she discovers that she really is

the queen of Bavaria

gee this is the first time in years I

haven't had to share a tub with a rubber

ducky

how wonderful for you

[Music]

[Music]

oh SWA

um wow

oh

well I guess the demonstration's over

huh

I wonder who won funny I never even

thought about that

I guess it's being up here and the

feeling there's nothing I can do about

it that is not my style

I'm from a long line of doers you know

oh yes

see that big building over there

and this one in the middle the one right

beside that

all developed by my old man

Baron Beckman he must have loved it well

he did it because his father did it

but my father really loved was fly

fishing

always promised himself that when he

retired that's the way he'd spend his

days

he didn't make it he uh

died at his desk my dad

age 52.

that's so young I'm sorry

when I was a kid I just wanted to be

exactly like my dad

now I'm afraid I may have succeeded

parents stick with you you know my

father was a socialist labor organizer

when I was seven he ran off with a lady

arc welder uh-oh

pop taught me two things don't trust

money

or men

well that's bad news for a male

capitalist pig isn't it

could say that

so what's your type what kind of guys

exotic interests like fly fishing

well that would depend on whether the

guy really loved fly fishing or whether

he was just doing it because his dad did

or because his dad didn't

hi hi

it's going to be pretty cold tonight

I thought you could use these

they're clean

you're a nice man

yes of course I wish you had taken up

fly fishing instead of soccer I'm really

sorry oh I bet

well thanks for listening tonight oh

thanks for talking I like that

it's fun

yeah we're very polite tonight

yeah

it was fun

okay

see you in the morning yeah you go

straight home now

nine

[Music]

foreign

[Music]

[Music]

mm-hmm

my car

bonjour Mrs worth

I'm sure Mr Lloyd I'm uh working late

tonight and I was wondering if you would

care to uh join me for some dinner

dinner

ah well uh

yes but I'm sequestered and I don't know

what the rules are about these sort of

things

room service

your room

clock over

and

I only want to talk about you

[Music]

I finally placed at Burr wall broad she

kept a room at the manor house when I

was a house stick there

but I'm keeping an eye on her just in

case she's up to roll tricks well I

hardly think that's necessary she is a

juror

let me tell you something

jurors dropped their drawers just like

anyone else already

something you're counting on huh

[Laughter]

oh yeah I'm Jorge And The Beat Goes On

the crowds keep coming to this

Courthouse like Lemmings racing to the

Sea driven by subliminal instinctual

biological urges despite the sideshow

glare of salacious sensationalism this

trial is about more than the tawdry sex

life of one man it's about

sex sex

pure Raw

undiluted animal lust it's about an

attack on a system founded on rules

regulations and standards of ethical

conduct

sex

and that's why Sandy lagelfost is a

national hero he's the Paul Bunyan the

Davy Crockett the Abe Lincoln of sex in

America but what happens to the system

these standards of morality and basic

human goodness are ignored and the

selfish pursuit of personal gain that is

the question posed by the trial of

Sanford Lego post and clear my calendar

All Over America are waiting get Bateman

on the phone your Witness

thank you

sorry

a description of Life in the Fast Lane

was very colorful Miss Hathaway

tell me

did the defendant carry very much cash

you know paper money

no no he always used credit cards so you

rarely saw him pay cash for anything

where actual money exchanged hands did

you

well no uh-huh so if I were to ask you

whether Sanford lagelfost had money cash

you couldn't truthfully say now could

you because you never saw him with any

well no

well no

no more questions your honor

you may step down

do you swear to tell the truth the whole

truth and nothing but the truth so help

you God I do state your name for the

record Arnold trout chairman of trout

Industries

Mr trout describe for us if you will Mr

Lego Frost position at trout Industries

well until his arrest Sanford legal

Falls to us head of corporate accounting

and how would you describe your relation

to the defendant

he was like the son that I never had

I cared for him I trusted him

and how did he repay that trust

he lied

he cheated he robbed he nearly ruined my

business and he destroyed my wonderful

marriage could you explain that sir I

was crazy with worry and my wife

couldn't take the pressure and she

finally left me

I was

heartbroken

devastated

and all because you trusted and cared

for Sanford legofost the son you never

had

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George

right uh look hon your mustache is

curling inside your mouth get it out

yeah

yeah it's good MIT teeth are good roll

tape

I'm Jorge

human sacrifice

murderers who live next door

body parts strewn all over the backyard

these are phrases which get your

attention

this

is the hotel where they have sequestered

the jurors in the trial of Sanford

ligophos the little man with the big sex

drive

today we'll be trying to get a

first-hand look at the after hour life

of these jurors

they are private moments if you will

meditation or titillation

that's our Focus

are you all right

yes but I'm worried about Sanford that

testimony from trout was pretty powerful

are you sure you're a capitalist Pig you

may be too sensitive oh no blue is to

Blue Blood

choked Yale Harvard Business School

born and bred for pigdon

The Baron's out of that

you don't have to be your Father's son

not if you don't want to well that's

starting to sink in

and of course you don't have to be your

pups kid either

no that's starting to sink into it

money is still suspect

but

men

good men are hard to find

it's probably because it's so difficult

to beat one

and you there must be a capitalist

piguet in your life yes there is

was

there is yes there I don't know I just

uh

I'm rethinking things

what

my life

I work lots of questions

oh those

what about the answers

you know you kicked me very hard and

that hurt sorry

you should be

I said I'm sorry

I've been trying to kiss you and you're

trying to make me feel guilty

my leg hurts

ouch

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thank you

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hey wait a minute I know you

what the hell are you doing here

I have to see my husband it's an

emergency well now he's your husband

he's one of the Jewelers you're working

with Rita I'm not working with anyone

you idiot I'm ovulating and we're trying

to get pregnant I've got to get this

body to my husband now

hi hi what's up

Coco and hearts in my room interesting

I've never played hearts

maybe she needs a good teacher that's

what I was thinking

maybe you could teach me

maybe I could

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foreign

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again

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[Applause]

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foreign

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anybody here hey hey you the desk clerk

look look honey sweetie come here

come on come on come on

maybe you can help me I need Rita

burwald's room number

Burr wall Rita 100 bucks for a room

number understand

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and so this Dominique wrapped in his

Sable coat Francois rode off into the

night

isn't that so romantic

there I go again

speaking French

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foreign

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ah

my precious jewels

a wild card that you are I am a married

woman

I'm a mother

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[ __ ]

oh

oh

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my God

Eddie is that you

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[Applause]

know

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I got it oh

very nice either I've had too much cocoa

or there's a woman on the ledge in her

underwear

oh gosh

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oh

my God

[Applause]

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leave him alone I'll give you the key to

my safe deposit box the money's in there

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yeah

I'm Jorge

I'm on a Ledge six sickening stories

above traffic

facing a hysterical woman in her

lingerie what's your name

you're hurry Jimenez ever had a real man

how about you

audience at home ask yourselves what

could make a woman

alone dressed in nothing but a flimsy

thigh revealing nightie risk her life on

a Ledge scarcely any wider than my nose

perhaps the Primal power of sex

my God

what are you doing here the man the

other half of the sexual equation if you

will drawn from his snail like seclusion

by the pungent irresistible odor of

Desire who the hell are you I'm Jorge

Blair what are you doing out here why

are you dressed like this a question

all of America is dying to know the

answer toe

sex

sex

other shows talk about it

on Jorge we bombard you with it we put

it in your living room

show it to you

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sex

[Applause]

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hot sorted

kinky

Zach

every year thousands of Americans die

accidental deaths

yeah honey this is really very simple

but you know maybe you should write it

down anyway okay all right now press

regular then large then warm okay

regular than large and warm okay keep

going yeah and put the soap in on top of

the clothes no bleach it's not what

makes things white the bleach come on

Mom wow okay how can you remember all

this stuff I'm a mother now tell

Francine no uh Mayo on the tuna okay

Francine no more on the tuna and make

Cliffy take all his vitamins okay well

you know you are amazing well thank you

for noticing hey let's have a cheer for

Mom kids on three ready one two three

and everything's under control here

don't you worry bye-bye

foreign

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I got some money Eddie I can't listen

if you need it

it's yours okay

no questions asked

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come on

Mrs worth

no

Mrs worth

um

about last night

I'm I'm on an antibiotic and when it's

mixed with alcohol the effect is uh

wonderful

thank you

for dinner

for trying

for helping me remember who I am

and who I'm not

well

and maybe that's something you should

work on

you know you're really a very nice man

with or without the French

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thank you

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it's essentially a sophisticated Ponzi

scheme in which payments were received

but not reported the funds were diverted

to accounts and companies in Switzerland

the Grand Caymans and then used to pay

for almost all the purchases mentioned

earlier

why were these diverted funds missed

sooner like any Ponzi scam money

received later was used to partially

cover the earlier diversions

brilliant plan there's only one flaw

how's that the transfer of funds by a

computer left an electronic Trail

fingerprints if you will

little like Hansel and gretel's trail of

breadcrumbs that's right don't worry

these crumbs lead every one of the

transactions originated at Sanford Lego

folks computer at trout Industries

you're with us

best look I just don't have that much

time to talk right now okay we are

sequestered sweetheart you need to see

the China and silver pattern uh-huh

Oh Daddy said not to worry about Windsor

I've had some second thoughts about when

I've had some second thoughts about

Windsor darling Daddy has one of his men

Riding Hood on it the money's unlock and

the tenants will be gone by the end of

the month all you have to do is sign

these pictures you're wrong the tenants

aren't ever leaving you thinking about

people's families and lives being

destroyed by that rip-off but we're

gonna stop it dead you should be

a social Cube come on Abby you don't

understand

give me a second Abby I said to sign

these

Phillip Abby Happy Wheels stop listen

this is an incredibly important legal

document you know what I think it is

shred shred shred Abby that's the old me

that's history you make me see all of

that all I care about now is a new life

I hate my own life I hated my business I

hate escargo I hate power lunches I hate

car phones I don't ever see another

silver pattern you know what I want to

do my fantasy I want to fly fish fly

fish because I want to please please fly

fish with me please

[Applause]

International money transfers private

Swiss accounts paper companies chartered

in the Grand Caymans it's also

intangible

Sanford lagelfost on the other hand is

very tangible and still he sits in front

of us Accused by lines and circles and

electronic fingerprints intangibles

now you've testified that the

defendant's computer

was implicated

why

but how do we know that the defendant

used it couldn't anyone have used it

each computer user has an access code

known only to him or her

Mr lagelfost would have to be the only

one who could use his computer unless

he told someone else's code

[Music]

yeah

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yes oh my God

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well folks I think that accountant

pounded a huge nail in Sanford's coffin

oh that's hard evidence to deny I just

hate thinking that Sanford's a thief

he's too sweet well I'm still not

convinced that he's guilty and it only

takes one juror to hang a jury and what

happens the next time this thing comes

to trial well somebody must have known

that secret access code that's why Hope

was hired to get the code from Sanford

yeah but who I mean so far all we really

know is that hope takes lousy dictation

not quite

Hope's not a secretary

the hooker

she had her face done so I didn't

recognize her at first

see I I worked a party with her a few

years ago

we were paid to be dates for a couple of

wealthy guys

I don't have to spell that one out

anyway all that's really important is

the fact that one of the guests at the

party

was Arnold trout

are you cute

well I didn't recognize trout at first

either he's changed a lot but it was him

at the party I'm positive so that's it

trout is the mystery man we're looking

for and hope Hathaway is lying through

her perfect teeth but that doesn't make

any sense Trout's already got mega bucks

but he won't after the divorce I read

all about it in this week's homo sapiens

it's getting real ugly and his wife is

going after a big chunk of him and a big

chunk of him is Cash Rich trout

Industries he'd want to protect that

cash two for two Marilyn so hopes the

bait she seduces him I didn't catch the

access code they start siphoning the

funds through Sanford's computer which

can never be found while they build the

frame to hang poor Sanford

wow all right well wait wait a second

this all sounds good folks but we can't

prove anything

how can prove it I've got the pictures

of that party at home they might loosen

her tongue see in my business it helps

to have insurance but we're sequestered

and this isn't our job is it we're just

the jury but aren't we supposed to

determine guilt or innocence I'm going

to get them

I'm going with you yeah I'm coming too

and we'll all stay here and hold down

the fort

I've always wanted to say that

sorry Eddie

wait a minute

I'm coming too

for once in my life I'm gonna do

something constructive

[Music]

I was surprised this could be

who could believe Rita was uh Lady Of

The Night

I don't know how old you know

she was so

[Music]

I really liked her

[Music]

you believe that sure

I fell in love with Arena once

Italy during the war

[Music]

I was scared to death

she was warm and made great minestrone

the fact that she charged to make ends

meet didn't seem very important

she was what she was

no explanations no apologies

I admired that Honesty tremendously

I read it reminds me of her

and I admire her honesty and courage

I really have the guts to be honest

about Who I Am with myself

not alone with a group of strangers

or someone who cares for me

how about you

[Music]

I think that you're a really smart guy

Harold

[Music]

I'm a teacher

[Music]

I don't believe this where where could

she be here they'll be here though oh

there she is hey there she is mission

accomplished

Arnold trout and hope David lust they're

so gross it's so powerful these pictures

could blow the lid off this case I just

thought of something if these pictures

are used in the trial the Press is going

to eat hope for lunch that's probably

true what are we going to do think of

something not even hope deserves that

deserves what

oh whoa These are nice pictures babe

these ought to be worth a bundle to

Trout stay out of shut up your safety

deposit box was empty it's no big

surprise but I'm tired of playing games

I'll just uh trade these in with Arnie

and we'll call it even

[Music]

for now wait a second those pictures are

tremendous evidence in a care

dip it up

you don't look like hero material to me

no let's everybody let's uh go climb

aboard an elevator and go up okay okay

all right now

[Music]

good here

hey hey what are you people doing down

here

[Music]

it's a gun yeah

forget it mother Misa I'm the elevator

let's go come on everybody everybody but

you Rita you're coming with me no she's

not she's staying right here hey Sonny

this isn't a movie this is a real gun

shoots real bullets

actually kills people

come on please there's nine of us here

what are you gonna do shoot us all don't

tap me little girl oh please I have

grown up around phonies all of my life

but you take the beluga you're nothing

but a [ __ ] bully yeah a typical triple

Scorpio full of hot air and hiding

behind a macho phallic symbol yeah

that's right people are crazy nuts

[Music]

[Applause]

everybody

foreign

[Music]

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I'm not an entrepreneur I'm really a

waiter in a restaurant I'm always

talking about doing something else but

I've been working there for four years

my boss says I'll probably be there for

40 more

sometimes

I get scared he's going to be right

that's me

thanks for being you

[Music]

thank you

statement please

thank you thank you

thank you

thank you

Justice

your honor

the defense would like to recall a

witness to the stand

Miss hope Hathaway

[Music]

do you have something to say to the

court Miss Hathaway

Sanford lagelfost didn't steal a set

from trout Industries

[Applause]

[Music]

[Applause]

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foreign

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listen my calendar's free for the next

couple of years I could I could wait you

will yeah oh Sandy see you Sandman

[Music]

[Music]

and I was walking down the street to pay

my gas bill and I noticed an ad on the

bulletin board it said teacher wanted is

that luck or what

um

I've been thinking about starting my own

business and Rita here was looking to

get into a little line of work we both

love clothes so we figured hey clothing

shop seem perfect and needed a tax break

so this investment was great plus I get

a discount on everything I buy and

something to do oh listen um I hope you

guys are going to be carrying baby

clothes get out of

Daddy

don't stop at just one Claire and Trevor

there's just nothing like a big family

except maybe a hot weekend alone with

your husband starting in exactly 52

minutes and 12 seconds okay

you're kind of quiet tonight oh darling

this is just like watching reruns I've

seen all this before

well promise you won't give away the

plot Evelyn

life's best enjoyed when it's a surprise

shall we

share

excuse me

[Music]

foreign

a marriage this is the second nice thing

to come out of this trial

the very first being the good guys

finally won one

I think you're all a very big part of

that victory

I believe that ours is a very fine

system of the law

the very best there is but I also

believe that it's going to take some

very fine people to make the system work

I think the same can be said for

marriage but from what I can tell

I think the good guys are going to win

another one

Brad Evelyn

[Music]

[Applause]

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[Applause]

but what is Santa the Lego Faust left

with only his steamy memories of Hope

his Tory partner in passion

hot body pressed up against his in some

sweat soaked love nest where reason and

caution are discarded like so much dirty

laundry at the foot of the bed

foreign

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foreign

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foreign

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