Original subtitles

Raph: Ever see one of those old movies

where the private eye wakes up

after being knocked out cold?

He always says the same thing.

"Where am I?"

Okay, so it's not exactly original,

but it's true.

I have no idea where I am.

Is this an operating room?

Torture chamber?

TV game show?

Last thing I remember,

I was battling a bunch of street thugs with Casey.

Hey, where is Casey?

Ah!

Okay, definitely not the game show.

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles ♪

Turtles, count it off!

1, 2, 3, 4!

- ♪ Turtles! ♪ - ♪ Mutant chain reaction ♪

- ♪ Turtles! ♪ - ♪ Livin' underground ♪

- ♪ Turtles! ♪ - ♪ Ninjitsu action ♪

- ♪ Turtles! ♪ - ♪ It's a shell of a town ♪

Turtles, count it off!

- One! - ♪ Live by the code of the martial arts ♪

- Two! - ♪ Never fight unless someone else starts ♪

- Three! - ♪ Always stick together no matter what ♪

- Four! - ♪ If all else fails, then it's time to kick butt ♪

- ♪ I love bein' a ♪ - ♪ I love bein' a ♪

♪ I love bein' a turtle ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles ♪

Turtles, count it off!

1, 2, 3, 4!

- ♪ Turtles! ♪ - ♪ There's no one better ♪

- ♪ Turtles! ♪ - ♪ Watch out for Shredder ♪

- ♪ Turtles! ♪ - ♪ They're like no others ♪

- ♪ Turtles! ♪ - ♪ Those teenage brothers ♪

- 1, 2, 3, 4! - 1, 2, 3, 4!

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles ♪

( echoing ) ♪ Turtles, Turtles ♪

Gecko warriors, karate frogs,

turtle costume freaks.

( snickering )

Is this a field report or a fantasy novel?

Fool! Was it fantasy

that destroyed your Mouser robots, Dr. Stockman?

Was it fantasy that took back the sword Tengu

from your foot soldiers?

These green-skinned ninjas

are too skilled to be mere street thugs.

Maybe they're working for your old enemies?

Ah, more likely a top secret government experiment.

( grunts )

I am not interested in theories!

Ah!

I want answers.

You two will work together, find these creatures,

learn their secrets, destroy them if necessary.

My sons, tonight our training shall focus

on combining two essential disciplines,

the way of balance...

and the way of invisibility.

Dude! You put in the Clapper?

Ow!

Michelangelo, the way of invisibility also includes the way of silence.

I suggest you employ both

if you wish to avoid my walking stick.

Hyah!

Peek-a-boo! I see you!

Whoa!

Hey, don't I least get points for creativity?

A creative mind must be balanced by a disciplined body.

We must learn stillness and alertness,

for they are the only defense

against the unexpected.

Hey, guys?

( yelling )

Uh-oh!

( growls )

Master Splinter, no!

He's okay.

Sansei, this is Casey, the nutca--

uh, the guy we told you about.

You remember, the igilante-vay?

We figured it'd be okay to give him access to the lair,

you know, for emergencies and stuff.

Please, forgive my rash action.

( grunts )

No problem-o.

Although next time you would be wise to heed

the ancient Japanese proverb:

phone first!

Whoa!

Raph, your crib's even more awesome than you said.

You didn't come all the way down here for the nickel tour.

What's the 411 street side?

Graffiti, it's everywhere, all over town.

And I think I speak for everyone in the room when I say, duh.

We're New Yorkers, Casey.

We've seen graffiti before.

Uh-uh, not this kind!

I think somebody's trying to send you a message.

1, 2, 3, 4!

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles ♪

1, 2, 3, 4!

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles ♪

Blech! Talk about getting the point.

Do all the tags look like this?

Some are a little more graphic.

Hey, cool sword.

Looks just like the one in the graffiti.

Casey, no!

( yells )

Remind me, whose idea was it to invite him down here?

I thank you for this information, Mr. Jones,

but now we must return to our training.

Wait, don't you guys want to put the smack down on the scum who did this?

Well, yeah, but it smells way too much like a setup.

Someone's just trying to get under our shells.

Why should we stoop to their level?

But this is a matter of honor.

What about all that bushy doo-doo stuff you guys always talk about?

That's bushido, which has nothing to do with payback

for a bunch of nasty wall doodles.

Sorry, Case, I got to go with my bros on this one.

Oh, man!

Say!

So what's on the tube?

( foreign language on TV )

Stockman: While your oversized lackey wastes time and effort

with the pointless scribblings of street thugs,

I have created something useful to intercept your amphibious pests.

I give you the Foot Tech ninjas.

My brilliantly designed cyber armor

enhances their physical abilities,

giving them increased strength...

speed and stealth capabilities.

And all thanks to the technology I was able

to glean from a tiny sample of this unusual artifact

you dragged up from the East River.

If you had any sense,

you'd allow me to study the entire thing.

Ow, ow, ow, ow!

First things first, Dr. Stockman.

Bring me the creatures.

Just keep this behemoth out of my way

and my Foot Tech ninjas will deliver the goods.

I guarantee it!

You have already paid the price for failing me once.

Do not fail me a second time.

Huh?

( electronic music on TV )

( music stops )

Sure is getting late.

These the only DVDs you got?

Yeah, in fact, why don't you borrow some and bring them back?

That's okay. I'll just watch them here.

Come on. Eject, eject!

You useless piece of...

( screams )

Think your player's broken.

No problem. I'll fix it... in the morning.

What you working on?

Boring stuff. Really, really boring stuff.

Hey, Raph, let's wrestle!

- Let go, bonehead! - No way, dipstick.

- Puke brain! - Geek!

- Dweeb! - You dork!

Raphael, normally I discourage excursions to the surface,

but I think it wise for you to take our guest for a breath of fresh air.

Topside? I'm all over it.

Booyah!

Come on, you maniac.

Maniac? Who you calling a maniac?

And that's how they defeated The Thing That Wouldn't Leave.

- Nimrod. - Lightweight!

Gack face!

- Spray paint? - Spray paint?

What kind of lame trash talk is that?

No, listen.

Hi, we're the neighborhood clean and green.

Casey: Doing our part to stamp out taggers.

Dude, you're totally stealing my act.

We got one!

Piece of cake.

Don't be so sure.

Phone boy called for backup and here it comes!

Casey: Whoa, those things aren't human.

In case you haven't noticed, neither am I.

Where'd they go?

They must have some kind of, what do you call it?

- Cloaking device. - Cloaking device?

What are they, Klingons?

Uh-oh.

Whoa!

Target apprehended.

What about him?

Just leave him for us.

It's payback time.

1, 2, 3, 4!

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles ♪

1, 2, 3, 4!

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles ♪

Psych!

Oh, where am I?

Hey, watch where you're poking those things!

When I get out of here I'm going to--

This is some nice steel.

How about telling me who gave them to you?

Yo mama.

I'm sorry. I didn't quite hear you.

You know, I get a little clumsy

when people don't answer my questions.

Hey, nice tat.

Purple dragon or just some big ugly chicken?

Let's start with just exactly what kind of freak are you anyway?

( groaning )

- Huh? - ( yelling )

You can almost set your watch by this guy.

Casey, what happened?

Where is Raphael?

The invisible ninjas took him.

Invisible ninjas, huh?

This story wouldn't involve Santa Claus

and the Easter Bunny by any chance?

I got proof.

Ooh! Some kind of optical device.

Heavy duty hardware.

Raph's not answering his shell cell.

( yells )

This is all my fault.

Don't worry, I installed tracking chips

in all the shell cells just in case.

Interesting. Not picking up a signal.

Oh, we'll never find him!

I may be able to calibrate the scanner to trace

a comm signal from your invisible ninjas.

Better make it fast.

We're running out of furniture!

We've been over this again and again, freak.

I'm only going to ask you this one more time. Who do you work for?

How long have you been on this planet?

What is the level of your technology?

Planet? Technology?

Boy, are you barking up the wrong shell.

Answer me!

Come to think of it, who do you work for?

I mean, you look way too dumb to be in charge of all this.

Your choice.

You can talk

or you can let your DNA do the talking for you.

Now, is there something you want to tell me?

Just this!

Sweet dreams, lard butt!

Don will kill me if I leave this.

( fog horn )

Good thing turtles are amphibious.

You fool!

I was this close to obtaining a DNA sample

and you let him escape.

Precisely. I let him escape to lead us to the others.

Even as we speak, a squad of Foot Tech ninjas are trailing the creature.

So now it's all up to your invisible boys.

Better hope they don't blow it.

I'm getting a signal.

It's Raph!

Woo-hoo!

This guy's bad news even when there's good news.

It's faint, but at least we got a blip we can follow.

Make that several blips.

The invisible ninjas signal?

Raphael may not even be aware he is being followed.

Which means we got to find him

before he brings in some seriously unwanted houseguests.

Mike: We already got one of those.

So how do we stop something we can't see?

Already got that one covered.

Turtle vision heat sensor goggles.

After all, an invisible body is still a warm body.

Let's go.

That's a good look for you.

Leo: We're going to have to split up.

Mike and Casey...

Quit it!

...you cover aboveground.

Me and Don will cover below.

Don: I spy with my turtle eye

some goons that need a good bapping.

Hey! Huh?

Both: Banzai!

Uh, guys, what are you--

Ever hear the one about the invisible ninjas?

Hey, did I mention that these guys were really strong, too?

Might have been useful info.

( grunts ) Come on!

Show yourself, you lousy...

Whoa.

Think we should give him a hand?

Fore!

Ah! Much better.

Now you see 'em.

Now you don't.

Their cloaking controls look to be somewhere around the chest plate.

You mean here?

Hyah!

Can I call them or what?

So I guess that's that.

( yelling )

Drop your weapons and surrender.

1, 2, 3, 4!

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles ♪

1, 2, 3, 4!

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles ♪

My grip is loosening.

I suggest you drop your weapons now.

Don't do it, guys, I'm not worth it!

You know, he's got a point.

You're starting to sound like Mikey, Don.

Hey, where is Mikey?

The way of balance

and the way of invisibility.

Whoa!

Yeah!

( shouting )

- Whoa! - Whoa!

Thanks guys, I owe you.

We take cash, personal checks and most major credit cards.

Man, I'm beat!

Maybe I should just crash at you guy's place tonight?

No!

I mean, nothing beats the comfort

of sleeping in your own bed.

We'll give you a ride. Have you home in no time.

Carry you up the stairs, tuck you in.

Heck, we'll even tell you a bedtime story.

Another operation marred

by the sickening stench of defeat.

No doubt you are both well aware of my extremely

limited tolerance for failure.

It was his fault.

This bumbling oaf let the creature escape.

The plan was sound.

And yet your creations failed to,

as you put it, deliver the goods.

Wait, where are you taking me?

Take your hands off me!

I made you! I am your creator!

What did you learn from your interrogation?

I worked over a lot of tough guys in my day.

I'm telling you, these turtles never even heard

of your enemies, let alone work for them.

Hmm, then perhaps they can be useful to me

when the time comes to confront those enemies.

Masters, it is true.

Our enemy has discovered our presence in this city.

And what of...

- ...the four... - ...mutant creatures?

Still an unknown factor.

We need more information.

Learn all you can about them.

If they pose no threat...

Do not engage them.

But if they are in the employ of our enemy...

Take the necessary steps...

All: To neutralize them.

( music playing )