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It's a most important affair

Mr. Drake wants
His evening shoes polished

We must see every speck is abolished

It's a most important affair

It's a most important affair

Mr. Drake is impeccably proper

And tonight he has ordered his topper

It's a most important affair

It's a most important affair

Mr. Drake always chooses the right tie

And tonight he has chosen his white tie

It's a most important affair

Dear Mr. Drake is so debonair

That his bath
Has perfumed bubble suds in

And he's wearing his shirt
With the studs in

It's a most important affair

With a white carnation to wear

Mr. Drake will be quick on the trigger

Give his highball that one extra jigger

Whether he pays me or pays me not
He don't care

He may do the town with the mayor

He may christen a sub or a lighthouse

He may even have grub
At the White House

I don't know but I'm willing to swear

It's a most, most, most, most

Seven o'clock.

Do them all over again.

A most important affair

Mr. Drake.

Come in.

- It's 7:00, sir.
- Mm?

It's 7:00 p.m.

Oh, thank you.

Say, are you engaged in this household
to call time signals?

No, sir.

Then spring out of here.

Oh, uh, Byngham.

Yes, sir?

Would you say I was inebriated
last night?

Oh, no, sir. Although you did have
Whiffin cook you six pancakes...

...and you spent an hour trying
to play them on the Victrola.

How did they sound?

Much better
after you put the syrup on them.

Although I wouldn't say
you were inebriated.

No. Oh, gracious me.

Go and tell my valet to come in
to my room at once. At once.

Yes, sir.

O'Brien?

- O'Brien.
- Yeah, yeah, what do you want?

- Mr. Drake wants to see you in his room.
- Oh, tell the old fo--

Folks that I'm coming

And they will sit all night and listen

- Good morning, boss.
- Morning.

I found this unopened letter
in your evening clothes, sir.

It seems it arrived
about four weeks ago.

Oh, you're not by any chance trying
to rush me into reading it, are you?

Fine thing, intruding on
a man's leisure.

Yeah.

I don't want to give this conversation
an unpleasant turn, Byngham...

...but scram out! Ohh....

Yes, sir, right there.

- What's this?
- That's a letter, remember?

Byngham put it there.

Oh, yeah.

Well, somebody should read it.

Well, what do you think of that?

Well, this is the end.

- What does the letter say, sir?
- Read it yourself.

Yes, sir.

"Having failed to fulfill your many promises
to make payments on your obligation...

...this is to notify you...

...that the bank has instituted foreclosure
proceedings on your property.

You will have approximately 60 days
to vacate the premises.

- Yours very-- Yours very--"
- Cordially.

Oh, yeah. "Cordially,
The National Bank of Manhattan."

You've got 30 days left.

- What are you gonna do, sir?
- Do?

I'll show you what I'm gonna do.

Hello.

Listen, Whiffin.
I want you to whif up-- Uh....

Whip up a super supper for--

Let me see, eight guests. Yes.

Make it a gastronomical masterpiece.

Yes, sir.

- Who's coming, governor?
- Go on downstairs. Get my evening clothes.

Better invite the man
who wrote that letter.

Yeah, I--

Shoot me the suit. I've got
to drape the droop on the old galoot.

- Are the guests financially fertile?
- Mustn't be mercenary.

- I'm not mercenary. I'm broke.
- Mm. Aren't we all?

What's up, Mike? I haven't cooked such
a spread since Mr. Drake's wife left him.

Maybe that's why she left him, ha-ha.
Hey!

- Are you trying to boil that beret?
- No, just giving it a wash and a polish.

Hmm. Could stand a change of oil too.

You being rather close to Mr. Drake...

...you can tell me why the staff hasn't
been paid for the last seven months.

An oversight, I suppose.

Of course, the piano business
hasn't been good lately.

It's been bad ever since
he fell heir to it.

Mm.

Going without salary is awkward
but we all love Mr. Drake so.

And he loves you all so.

- Hello, Mil.
- Hello, Michael.

- Ready with the pumps?
- Coming.

Hello, small, cute and adolescent.

I have finished adolescing.

- You shouldn't hurry that.
- That's what I keep telling her.

- Aging takes time.
- Oh, shut up, Junior.

How do you like that, three days older
than me and she calls me Junior.

Ha-ha. How are you with
your biography, Marty?

Oh, swell.

I found that the Drakes built their
original house on this very spot in 1622.

They didn't come over on the Mayflower.
They met it.

I found out the original harpsichord made
by the Drake family is still in existence.

Supposed to be hidden
right in this very house.

No.

- Millie. What have you done?
- Please, Mr. Byngham, I didn't mean to.

Now, don't get excited, Millie.
I'll fix it. Hand me that flour.

- Not much damage.
- Not much shirt, either.

- And after 20 years in this household.
- This shirt? Anyone can make a mistake.

This person is not even anybody.

And she wants to go
to the Butler's Ball.

The Butler's Ball?

- Someday I will go.
- Sure you will.

The annual Butler's Ball is one
of New York's most dignified events.

I know, but in a few years there won't
be enough butlers left to throw a ball.

Here you are.

Thank you, Michael.

- You're wonderful.
- I'm quite popular with myself too.

That's what comes when a nightclub
singer turns valet. Get back to work.

Go on to the laundry.
See if you can pick up bath towels...

- ...without mutilating them.
- Yes, sir.

That's the trouble
with the scullery maids-- Aah!

I know how I feel, but how do I look?

- Good enough to be buried.
- I beg your pardon.

- I mean that as a compliment, sir.
- Miss Sandy Brooks.

- Sandy.
- Hello, Mike.

What brings you here?

- Thirty bucks a week with room and board.
- Thir--?

Oh, yeah.
Yes, it all comes back to me now.

- Yeah, it usually does.
- Oh, Mr. Drake.

You remember Sandy,
my former vaudeville partner?

- How do you do?
- She's-- Oh, yes, of course, yes.

I haven't seen you in a long time.

Not since you engaged me, last night.

- I engaged you?
- Yes.

- As social secretary.
- Remember?

You were a little stiff.

Beg pardon, Whiffin's compliments,
the gastronomical masterpiece is prepared.

- None of the guests seem to have arrived.
- Never mind that.

- Will you join us?
- Delighted.

Mr. Drake.

- Good evening, everybody.
- Good evening.

- If there's something that's--
- Don't get nervous, Byngie.

I'd like you to meet Miss Sandy,
our new social secretary.

- How do you do?
- Now, Whiffin...

...I asked you to prepare dinner
for eight guests.

Yes, sir.

All right. One, two,
three, five, eight.

You are my guests.

- You want to dine with the staff?
- No. I want the staff to dine with me.

Go inside and find your places.

- Very well, sir. As you wish.
- I wish.

If I had known about this,
I'd have changed my clothes.

If I'd have known about it,
I'd have washed the tomatoes.

Millie, you will serve.

- Yeah, start with sherry.
- Yes, sir.

Now, everybody sit down. Including me.

A democratic household
if I ever saw one.

You're going to love it here.
I propose a cheer to our host, Mr. Drake.

The man to whom we owe so much
and vice versa.

- Hooray.
- Hooray.

Well, this is a dramatic moment.

I don't remember
when I've been as touched.

Exactly seven months ago.

I see what you mean. I should like you
to know that over 300 years ago...

...the Drake family established themselves
right on this very site.

As you all know, the Drake family prospered
and amassed a great fortune.

It ran into a ridiculous figure.

All went well until 1941,
then unfortunately, a catastrophe occurred.

- What has happened?
- I have been picked clean by buzzards.

I have vultures in my investments...

...and today my creditors
have discredited me...

- ...and that, oh, that was my end.
- And he's flat on it.

Oh, well, let's not get down in the dumps.
As dumps go, this ain't bad.

- As dumps go, this one's going in 30 days.
- What?

- So this is the rich Mr. Drake.
- Now known as "that schlemiel."

Mr. Drake, this is a sad state of affairs,
but not wholly unexpected on my part.

If you hadn't lost the influence
of your wife and daughter...

...this might never have happened.

I didn't know you had a daughter.

Oh, yes. Pamela's living in Switzerland
with her mother.

Mrs. Drake ran off with a fellow--

Whiffin, Whiffin, please,
we will not discuss my family.

Wait a minute, Byngham,
the kid hasn't been paid for seven months.

She's entitled to drop noodle soup
on her own time.

I'm very sorry, sir.
Thank you, Michael.

Just a moment.

Why is she doing all the work?
Why isn't she sitting down here?

She can't sit down.
She has a low seniority.

She has? I didn't notice that.

She was the last to take employment
and is the servant's servant.

Oh, snobs, eh? Well, dear,
you take my seat and I'll serve.

- Oh, I couldn't do that, sir.
- You can.

Take the head of the table. There you are.
Sit down. That's the idea.

- Thank you, sir.
- That's all right.

- You remind me of my father.
- Really?

Just before he died.

That gives me a great idea.
And it's the answer to all our problems.

It goes back to him
because he had a daughter.

If he had that daughter now,
she'd probably be a debutante.

And marry rich guys,
set the Drake family back on its feet.

And we'd all get paid.

So we take a dame, see.
That's our bait.

We sugar the dame with a lot
of swell clothes.

And we call her Miss Pamela Drake,
the debutante daughter of Cyrus Drake.

The famous piano tycoon.

It takes more than a bottle
of champagne...

- ...to launch a debutante.
- We can all chip in.

- We have a Fifth Avenue mansion.
- Yeah, for 30 days.

Katherine Keating's coming out
at the horse show.

Who cares about Katherine?
I wasn't in show business for nothing.

We'll build our deb up to number one
with publicity.

It sounds plausible to me.
I'm not one to overlook a sound investment.

Mom's got dough.
We establish this girl with her father--

I know. All we need
is a girl to play the part.

- I am at your disposal.
- Okay, you're disposed of.

- Mr. Drake.
- Yes?

Millie looks like your daughter.

- Millie?
- Oh, no, I don't look like anybody.

Sure you do. She's in the bag.
We've struck a potential gold mine.

Say, Sandy,
you can help us polish Millie.

But I don't want to be polished.

Nevertheless, it looks to me
like you're gonna be a debutante.

- Well, I don't like the idea.
- Oh, nonsense.

You'll have the time of your life.
You'll be rich.

- Sure.
- Hey, wait a minute.

Maybe she's got a guy already.
Have you?

Have you?

- Well....
- Uh-uh.

Is he in love with you?

I don't think so.

Who is he?

Oh, he's a--

Oh, he sings to me from his window
across the way. I, uh....

We just wave at each other, like that.

Well, I guess you can't get into
any trouble just waving.

Listen, Millie, you wanna go
to the Butler's Ball, don't you?

- Oh, more than anything else in the world.
- You're going.

She's going to the Butler's Ball
and she's gonna sponsor it.

Byng, you can fix that.

Well, uh, perhaps.

- Will you do it?
- Well.

- You'll have a big house.
- We'll be waiting.

You'll have automobiles and limousines.

What do you say?

- I'll say yes.
- Hooray!

Good. The first meeting will be tomorrow.
Contracts will be signed...

...and we all share equally
in Millie, Incorporated.

Now may I present Miss Pamela Drake.

Katherine Keating's falling down

Falling down, falling down

Katherine Keating's falling down
My fair Millie

We will organize a corporation
And I will supervise its operation

There's money in the movies
There's money in the ads

There's money in the old Johns
There's money in the lads

Millie, Millie, Millie
Money, money, money, money

Eeny, meeny, miney, money
Mo and mo and mo

- I'll do it
- Hooray!

We'll catch a fortune by the ton

I won't say can't, I'll say cahn't

I won't say shan't, I'll say shahn't

I'll call my aunty my aunt
For today I'm a debutante

When you're invited to dine

You don't drink beer, you drink wine

- It's all just too, too divine
- Too! Too!

That today I'm a debutante

I'll wear a face like a sphinx

I'll dress in ermines and minks

If necessary, you'll wear a sarong

I'll be polite to the press
And I'll learn how to say yes

When the right man comes along

If I come home about 4

And find a wolf at my door

Invite him in

This is war

And today you're a debutante

Hooray!

Quiet, please, no riot, please!

This lowly little creature
Must be made into a double feature

I can't wait to be a fabulous

- Amorous
- Glamorous

Hunk of bait

We're gonna be rich!

In the social swim
I'll make an awful splash

I'll buy Boston and I'll pay cash

I'll play the ponies
I'll mingle with the phonies

Just disgustingly rich

Every winter we will learn to ski

Every summer we will sail the sea

Catch barracuda down in Bermuda

Just disgustingly rich

I'll buy autos with the autocrats

I'll drink Pluto with the plutocrats

Swimming in highballs

Stewed to the eyeballs

Disgustingly rich

We can dig the spots
With the jitterbug set

Park our chewing gum
On the seats at the Met

We won't be civil

Nasty as the devil

Just disgustingly rich

What about me?

You will rocket like a ball of fire

Higher and higher
and higher and higher

You must be pale as a ghost

And always rude to your host

And forget Miss Emily Post

For today you're a debutante

Then I will fly about town
And meet some guy about town

Who's worth a million
In glamour and swank

When he says, "Will you be mine?"

Before you give him the sign

- Be sure he's got it in the bank
ALL: Right

The world is mine to bewitch

So get right in there and pitch

Three cheers, we're gonna be rich

Too, too disgustingly rich

There, it is finished.

It is exquisite.

- I am stunned.
- So am I.

Oh, she is beautiful.

- Am I really?
- Even I'd be beautiful in that.

Okay, chum, here's your money.

Thank you so much for paying in cash.

It's quite unusual for me.

- It's quite unusual for me too.
- Ahem.

Come along, Rita.

Isn't it wonderful what the right
clothes can do for a girl?

It's wonderful what the
right girl can do for clothes.

Let's cut out the trade-lasts
and get to work, shall we?

- Oscar, carry these boxes upstairs.
- Yes, ma'am.

My goodness. That sure
is some transformation, Miss Millie.

- What's that?
- A book.

- I'll never be able to read it that way.
- It's not for reading.

- You're gonna learn how to walk.
- But I know how to walk.

That's what you think. Watch me.

You see, a debutante
has to do the society slink.

Like this.

Sort of sneers with her feet.

All right.

- I sneer with my feet?
- Right.

Sneer.

- Slink.
- Sneer.

Slink.

Oh, that book is too light.

- Have you got Gone With The Wind?
- My feet hurt.

Never mind, you've got to get it.

- Here, try this one.
- Oscar, play some walk music.

Walk music? Nobody walks when I play.

Well, play it anyway.

While we're walking,
we're going over that lesson again.

Okay, Oscar, go.

- Now then, what's your name?
- Millie Picot.

- What?
- Pamela Drake.

- Where are you from?
- Switzerland.

- Your father's name?
- He's dead.

What?

- Mr. Drake.
- That's better.

Now, what are you going to be?

- Sick.
- Oh, brother.

Oh, Michael, please. I'll try again.

All right. Here we go.

What are you going to be?

I'm going to be debutante number one.

Right, and who is Katherine Keating?

- The girl I have to lick.
- Good!

Oh, dear, that settles everything.

- Did the publicity break?
- Break?

Like a cloudburst
and all over me. Look!

- Who's that?
- Millie.

Oh.

Millie?

This is great.
It says your daughter arrived.

Yes, it also said my wife, Emily,
arrived with her.

We can get away with this daughter stuff,
but half the society people knew my wife.

So what? That's an easy one.

- We'll have Sandy be Mrs. Drake.
- They'll wonder what she looks like.

After 15 years of wear and tear,
Sandy's a natural for a setup like that.

- Sandy, meet your husband.
- How do you do?

- It's only within the corporation.
- We'll take a vote on that.

- Millie. Meet your mother.
- How do you do?

How could she be my mother
when she's never met my father?

Television.

What will they wear next?

You know, Millie?

You know, it's dangerous for a girl
to be as attractive as you are.

Oh, Michael.

Oh, I'm too happy to talk
and I'm too excited to keep quiet.

- Shall we sit down?
- Yes, Michael.

There's something
I should warn you about.

- What?
- Wolves.

- Wolves in New York?
- Oh, packs of them.

And they'll be howling after you.

Now, these higher-bracket wolves
have the sharpest claws.

First, there's the type
called the creepy wolf.

- Is he dangerous?
- He's no vegetarian.

He starts in by putting his arms
around you.

Presumably to fix your collar.

Then softly and slowly his hands
rest on your shoulders.

And his paws just stay there?

No, no.
They keep going down, down.

Mm. Pretty soft touch, he thinks.

You mean he wants to see
if I am tender?

- Hm?
- Michael, how do I make a man be a wolf?

Oh, well, you--

Why?

- Well, you want me to get a rich husband.
- Oh, but, Millie, you're just bait.

You see, when you put bait on a hook,
you don't expect it to make like that.

How will I know
when the right man comes along?

Oh, you'll know.

You'll look at some guy
and he'll look at you...

...and you'll look at each other
and it just clicks, that's all.

What clicks?

Well, your blood starts fizzing
like ginger ale...

...you're walking on air.

Your heart starts pumping
strange noises into your head.

Clicking noises?

Yes.

Tell me more.

Uh, then there's another type of wolf
called the hand-kisser.

He starts by admiring your hand,
he says:

"What a lovely hand you have,"
starts kissing like this:

Before you know it,
he's nibbling on it like it was spareribs.

We're playing a game.
He's a wolf and I'm pretty soft.

Yeah--

Um, she-- I was just trying to, uh,
show her a few things I picked up.

From the things you picked up.

That's it.

- Mickey.
- Yeah?

Go to the door and tell the man
to come back in 60 days.

But we're being put out in 30 days.

- That's the point.
- Oh, all right.

- What if it's a woman?
- Tell her the same thing.

Okay.

Yeah?

Good morning.
My name is Frank Sinatra.

What?

Ohh!

Just a moment, please.

Don't you feel well?

Oh, I--

I feel wonderful.

Well, then let's pull ourselves
together, shall we?

Did--? Did you--?
Did you come to see me?

No. I came to see the young lady
that waves like that:

- Oh, the one who waves like that?
- Uh-huh.

She's in here. Come on.

It's for you. His name is Sinatra.

- How do you do?
- How do you do?

- Hello. I brought you some flowers.
- Hello.

- For me?
- Uh-huh. And a new song.

- Oh, thank you.
- Sweet.

You haven't been waving lately
and I thought perhaps you were ill.

Oh, no. I feel swell.

You see, we know each other
from across the courtyard.

Oh, so you're the one.

Sounds positively indecent.

You know how your father feels
about those things.

- Am I doing wrong?
- You're not doing bad.

- Uh, may I ask your name?
- My name is Millie Pico--

That's just a nickname. You see,
her real name is Miss Pamela Drake.

Of the Drakes.

Oh, I'm sorry. It's rather silly.

I thought Miss Drake
was a member of the household staff.

I apologize.

- The staff accepts your apology.
- The staff accepts your apology.

- Is there something wrong with your head?
- Oh, no.

- You see, I'm just learning to walk.
- It's a delayed case.

We're getting Miss Drake ready for her
debut next week at the Butler's Ball.

A coincidence.
I'm singing at the Butler's Ball.

- Our chambermaid has asked me.
- Oh, you mean Margaret--?

Oh. How very nice.
Is this a love song?

No, it's a torch ballad.

Oh, a hot tune, ain't it?

Ain't it?

Won't you please sing it for me now?

- Oscar will play.
- Well, I--

- You see, Pamela, I think--
- Don't mind Michael.

- He's only the valet here. Come along.
- I'm only the--

- Oh, Oscar?
- Yes, ma'am?

Would you play this for my friend?

For your friend,
I'll play it extra well.

That guy may sing us out of a fortune.

I couldn't sleep a wink last night

Because we had that silly fight

I thought my heart would break

The whole night through

I knew that you'd be sorry

And I'm sorry too

I didn't have my favorite dream

The one in which I hold you tight

I had to call you up this morning

To see if everything was still all right

Yes, I had to call you up

This morning

'Cause I couldn't sleep a wink last night

I didn't have my favorite dream

The one in which I hold you tight

I had to call you up

This morning

To see if everything was still all right

Yes, I had to call you up

This morning

'Cause I couldn't sleep a wink

Last night

- That's beautiful.
- Thank you.

I think it's fine too.

Thank you too.

That was great, old boy.
We'll be seeing you at the Butler's Ball.

- And maybe I'll sing for you.
- That'll be peachy.

Oh, I'll just see my friend out.

So long.

Mrs. Keating and Miss Keating.

How do you do? I'm Mrs. Keating.
This is my daughter, Katherine.

- How do you do?
- How do you do?

I'm an old school friend
of Mrs. Drake. I thought--

I'm sorry, I'm sort of
a stranger here myself.

This is Miss Drake.

Goodbye, Pamela. Don't work too hard.

Oh, I don't anymore
since we got the new vacuum cleaner.

Goodbye.

- Goodbye.
- Goodbye.

- So you're Pamela.
- Mm-hm.

Well, well, well.

It's so nice that your mother and father
are making up after all these years.

I never did believe half the things
I know about him.

Of course, you remember Katherine.
Or don't you?

- Well, I, um--
- When you were tiny tots of 5...

...you used to scratch each other up.

- Did we?
- Mother, please.

And now you're going to be
rival debutantes.

Tell me, darling. How did you leave
dear, wonderful Lucerne?

Oh, um....

She's quite well, thank you.

Mother was speaking
of Lucerne, Switzerland.

Oh, I don't think I know her at all.

She don't.

Oh, you must excuse Miss Drake.

She's so terribly tired...

...trying on gown after gown,
posing for pictures, you know how it is.

You run up, dear,
get into something more comfortable.

All right, Mother.

Mother, she always calls me mother.
Everybody does.

I mother them so.

Sandy.

Who was that singing down here?
Bing Crosby?

- Bing-bang Sinatra.
- Ah.

Well, he'll never get anyplace.

Well, Cyrus,
aren't you going to speak?

Of cour-- Ahem. Of cour-- Ahem!

Of course, dear. How are you?

Don't you remember me?

Why, how could I ever forget a face
like yours, so well-preserved.

Have you seen little Pamel--?
Oh, hello, darling.

Hello, Mr. Drake.

Uh, she always calls me Mr. Drake.
So respectful, don't you think?

Oh, yes. Come along, darling.

Good afternoon.

Shall we sit down?

- Who is this?
- My daughter, Katherine.

Oh, little K-K-K-Katie.
Yes, of course.

Do sit down, please.

- What brings you here?
- This morning's newspaper.

Uh, this morning's newspaper.

Yes. When we read that Emily and Pamela
were back we rushed right over.

- Oh.
- And one other thing.

Katherine stands a very good chance
of being this season's debutante...

...and I wondered if you'd mind waiting
until next year to bring Pamela out.

I'm awfully sorry. We couldn't do that.
I'll tell you why. Could we?

- Oh, no.
- Oh, no. No.

Oh, may I present my secretary
and my secretary?

No, we just must bring Pamela
out this year.

I think I'd better have a word
with Emily about this.

Oh, do that. Oh, no, no, please.

- Where is she?
- Well, uh, she's under the weather.

- Really?
- Yes, she's got it.

- No.
- She's had it for some time.

Ohh.

Doesn't seem to be able
to get rid of it.

Oh, Mr. Drake.

The committee has approved to have
Miss Drake sponsor the Butler's Ball.

- The Butler's Ball?
- Oh, yes.

All right, Byngham.

Uh... I'll speak to Emily
about this later.

Oh, Mrs. Keating, are you leaving?

- I'm afraid we must.
- Oh, that's too bad.

- Well, come and see us again, won't you?
- Thank you.

Oh, if you're not busy on Friday,
do come to my party and bring her.

Well, if it's at all possible.
Thank you very much.

- Thank you.
- Goodbye.

Oh, it's formal.

Good evening, ladies and gentlemen.
Welcome to the 37th annual Butler's Ball.

The committee extends its cordial thanks
to all members...

...to our generous patrons
and particularly to our honored sponsor...

...a charming, gracious
and most beautiful young lady...

...a member of one of our oldest
and most distinguished New York families...

...a favorite for the season's number one
debutante, Miss Katherine Keating.

Thank you very much,
ladies and gentlemen.

It's indeed a privilege for me
to be here this evening...

...and I'm highly honored
to be chosen as your sponsor.

Thank you.

Psst! Hey, Byngham.

- Oh, Mr. Speaker?
- Yes.

You've made a mistake.

How do you suppose
that Keating dame pulled that off?

I don't know.
Guess she's got a better butler.

Yeah, and he probably gets paid.

Ladies and gentlemen...

...we are very fortunate
to be honored with two sponsors...

...the second, an equally charming
and gracious young lady...

...also a member of an old
and distinguished New York family...

...and a close rival for the season's
number one debutante, Miss Pamela Drake.

Your speech, speech. Make your speech.

Ladies and--

Ladies and gentlemen.

This is a very great-- Oh!

This is a very great evening--

It's gone.

Say something.

Well, anyway....

All--

All my life I've dreamed of attending
the Butler's Ball.

And just think, here I am.

I'm so happy.
I can't believe it's poor little me.

I wouldn't be surprised
to wake up in the morning...

...and find that I have been dreaming...

...that I haven't really been here at all.

- Well, I have never--
- Pipe down.

I have never piped down--

What a delicious sense of humor.

I have never sponsored anything
before in my life.

Although I've heard it done
by the soap man on the radio.

What's this?

And I want you to know that...

...that the bar will close at 2:00.

She's wonderful.

Well...

...I just like you--

I just want to say that...

...this is the most wonderful night
of my life...

...and that I hope that the man there
will let me come down onto the floor...

...and let me dance...

...just once.

Thank you.

You bet we will, Miss Drake.

Spoken like a true Drake.
Sweet, simple and incoherent.

We're going to ask
our gracious and beautiful sponsors...

...to step down and receive
a small token of appreciation...

...from our committee.

Oh, Mike, I'm frightened.

That's all right. Go on down.

Remember to sneer with your feet.

And keep your mouth shut.

- Yes, Mr. Drake.
- Mr. Drake.

- Hello.
- Hello.

The presentation this evening will be made
by a very special guest.

Through the courtesy
of Mr. Frank Sinatra's chambermaid...

...we present Frank Sinatra.

The music stopped

But we were still dancing

Which goes to show

That music has charms

The lights were low

So we went on dancing

I felt the glow

Of you in my arms

The band had left the stand

And we were in heaven

Dancing on a cloud

Way off in the blue

The music stopped

And people were glancing

But we went on dancing

For we didn't know

Because the lights were low

And we were in love

The band had left the stand

And we were in heaven

Dancing on a cloud
Way off in the blue

The music stopped

And people were glancing

But we went on dancing

For we didn't know

Because the lights were low

And we were in love

We're going to fulfill Miss Drake's
request and ask that both sponsors...

...and their escorts lead
the first dance.

Miss Drake's escort is a new
but promising member of our fraternity...

...Mr. Michael O'Brien.

Well, that's fine.

To add to our galaxy of celebrities
this evening...

...we have Miss Keating's escort,
a nobleman of ancient lineage.

May I present Sir Victor Fitzroy Victor,
KB, O.B.E.

KB, O.B.E.?
He sounds like a radio station.

Yes, but his title has a nice ring to it.

- Mm, like a cash register.
- Maybe we can tap it.

If the Keatings haven't already hooked him,
he might be a likely prospect for Millie.

A capital candidate.

- Well, as, uh--
- Sir Victor.

As chairman of the corporation,
I shall give him considerable consideration.

Sir Victor...

...I don't think
introductions are necessary.

You can call me Mike.

- Thank you. Same goes for me.
- Okay, Mike.

Thank you, Mike.

Oh, Pamela, may I present
Sir Victor Fitzroy Victor, KB, O.B.E.

- How do you do?
- How do you do?

- Oh, good evening, Miss Keating.
- Good evening.

Sir Victor, they're waiting for us.

Excuse me.

- Looks all right.
- Oh, yes.

Looks like the dough from now on.

Mike.

I feel wonderful.

My blood is fizzing like ginger ale.

I'm walking on air...

...and I'm hearing strange noises.

What's that?

Doesn't it mean anything to you?

Sounds like a cricket.

It's a click.

So all right, put it away.
You can play with it when you get home.

Mr. Sinatra has lovely round notes,
doesn't he?

Yes, but they're not negotiable.

You're supposed to keep your mind
on Sir Victor.

- Sir Victor?
- Yes.

Miss Drake is a graceful dancer,
isn't she?

Yes.

He isn't half bad, Millie.
I'm sure the corporation will okay him.

- For what?
- For your husband.

After all, he's obviously wealthy
and has a swell title.

Well, he's not my idea of a husband.

Maybe not,
but he's satisfactory to the corporation.

- Well, haven't I anything to say?
- Sure, sure.

You say yes when we tell you to.

Here he comes now.
Try to make an impression on him.

He's smiling. You sure impressed him.

Tell me, Katherine,
are the Drakes people of means?

Oh, I guess they have money.

I'm gonna suggest
that we exchange partners.

Oh, no.

Why not?

I don't know how to dance
with foreigners.

Here he comes.

Now, we'll sort of stall until he catches up
to us then I'm going to ask him.

- What's the matter?
- I don't know.

I seem to be shorter on one side.

You dance like you were
on the side of a hill.

What kind of a step is that?

Maybe it's housemaid's knee.

Stop it. Stop it, will you?

Michael, I can't help it.

Well, that's a strange dance
she's doing.

Please, stop it.
Think of the corporation.

Look, Mr. Drake is looking at us.
Come on. Pull yourself together.

There, that's better.

Say, are you getting smaller?

- I lost my shoes.
- What?

Oh, well, you can't see them.

Michael...

...I don't want to dance
with anyone else but you tonight.

Don't be silly.
You've got to dance with the millionaire.

- No, no, no.
- Listen--

Hey, your hair.
Your hair is coming down.

Fix your hair. Pick-- Come up--

Look, he's looking.

Fix it up, dear. That's it.

That must be the American Indian dance
I've heard so much about.

- Haven't you any more hairpins?
- No, let it go.

I often wear it that way.

Look at Millie. She's falling apart.

Yeah, so is Mom's bankroll.

Pull yourself together. Sir Victor
is just behind us. I'm gonna ask him.

Michael,
can't we dance around once more?

No, no. This is business.

Oh, my dress.

Um....

Thank you, Sir Victor.

- I hope you don't mind.
- Not at all.

Well, Miss Drake,
we seem to be left alone. Shall we?

Wasn't it wonderful last night?

All the best people were there,
including Mrs. Vandewater's butler.

Wasn't Pamela Drake a panic?

My friend liked her better
than any of the entertainers.

And, you know,
she looked just like a kitchen maid...

...I used to work with
over in Long Island.

Oh, look at her now.

Sarah, the ball is over.

Yes, mum.

One picture of me
and 10 pictures of Pamela Drake.

In this, she's shaking hands
with a waiter.

Here she is applauding herself.

Here's a large one of her
dancing in her stocking feet.

If you ask me,
Mr. Drake bought up every editor.

Maybe you could have gotten more pictures
in the paper had you dropped your girdle.

Mother.

There's something I don't understand
about this.

Pamela Drake arrives in town,
unheralded and unheard of.

And a week later,
she's a social sensation.

Katherine,
I don't think she is Pamela Drake.

What?

At any rate, we'll find out on Friday.

Mother, you are not going to that party
on her invitation.

We certainly are now.

Wake her gently.
She's got the morning jitters.

Those newspaper notices
would cure anybody's headache.

Uh-oh!

- You suppose she scrammed?
- I don't know. Look in there.

- Yes?
- No.

Oh, she probably didn't sleep a wink
last night.

Hey, Mike.

Millie, what are you doing there?

It's Wednesday.

- What's that got to do with it?
- I always scrub the steps on Wednesday.

That's all we need.

A picture of the heiress
manicuring the stoop.

Come in out of there.

Some debutante.

Good morning.

Oh, hello.

Are you getting your exercise?

No, just scrubbing the steps.

I came to congratulate you.
You were wonderful last night.

Oh, I thought I was too.

Say, what's the idea--?

Oh! Pamela, you're not supposed to be
doing this now.

Photographers won't be here
for a half hour.

- Things those newspapers think up.
- I didn't know--

You didn't know the photographers
were late.

- She's so forgettable.
- I brought Miss Drake flowers.

- Gee, that's swell.
- She means that's nice.

Yes. Say, where are you getting
all of these flowers?

My old man owns a flower shop.

That's nice too.

Well, come on, come on, Pamela,
you've got a lot of checks to sign, my dear.

Oh, no, you can't play with your pail yet.
Later on you may.

- She's going to the beach.
- She loves water.

- Sometimes she blows bubbles.
- Goodbye.

Goodbye, Frank.
See you at the window.

Yes, she'll see you.

- Hello.
- So long.

- I saw you first.
- Now, wait a minute.

Nobody else is gonna get you

- I saw you first
- Guess I'm in it

Nobody else is gonna pet you

You smiled at me

That was my lucky break
Gave you that double take

- Said to myself
- Quote

- Oh, Frankie
- Unquote

- You gave it that
- I did?

I suddenly found myself in clover

- I tumbled flat
- You sure did

That was the time that you took over

If someone else wants to try
This love scene we've rehearsed

What'll I tell them, baby?

Juts tell them I saw you first

I'll try to remember
That I saw you first

- Me?
- Baby, I should have seen you sooner

- I saw you first
- Oh, gee

- Think you could ever stand a crooner?
- Uh-huh

You smiled at me
That was my lucky break

Gave you that double take

- Said to myself
- What did you say?

That does it

You gave it this

I was like a clown in clover

And that first kiss

That was the time that you took over

So if my other love affair
Should go and burst

What other love affair,
you double-crosser?

From now on I'll listen to Crosby.

Okay, but remember

I saw you first

Lovely thing you're playing, Victor.
What is it?

It's a piano.

Very funny.

I've wondered what made a musician
like you take up the piano.

Well, you see, my teacher couldn't play
any other instrument. That is why.

I should have known better.

There's a very nice picture of you
and Pamela Drake here.

- So?
- Did you know I consider you photogenic?

Yes, so did the Continental Police.

That's why they took so many
pictures of me. Well.

"Among other notables
attending the Butlers' Ball...

...was Sir Victor Fitzroy Victor,
KB, O.B.E."

That title you tag onto me
is a tongue twister.

Yes, and very attractive to rich young
ladies, particularly Miss Pamela Drake.

Uh-huh. I see what you mean.

Do you mind if I have
a look at the paper?

Oh, not at all.

I am the fourth assistant
managing director.

- Oh, really?
- Mr. Green. A word with you, sir.

I shall not be able
to pay my bill this week.

- That's what you said last week.
- Did I?

- Well, I kept my word, didn't I?
- You most certainly did.

See, Mr. Henry, if he told you that
he couldn't pay last week and didn't...

...he kept his word.
I think you owe him an apology.

Quite. Last week I told Mr. Green if he
didn't pay this week, I would turn him out.

- And I am going to keep my word.
- Quite.

You wouldn't let a little matter like a bill
make you upset, would you?

You see, Sir Victor
is going to marry Miss Pamela Drake.

Drake? But last week you told me
he was gonna marry Katherine Keating.

My good man, that was last week.

Only difference is
Miss Keating has a million dollars.

- And Miss Pamela Drake has 2 million.
- Two.

Ohh. Hm.

- Quite.
- Quite.

Quite.

Quite. Quite.

I--

I, uh--

Quite. Quite.

Sir Victor.

Oh, Sir Victor, the compliments
of Miss Pamela Drake, sir.

She's extremely sorry she poured
the champagne down your back last night.

Oh, that's perfectly all right.

Isn't it a little unorthodox,
her sending me flowers?

Very odd girl.

Her father's rather odd too.
He was wondering...

...if you and Mr. Green
will accept his invitation to come...

...to Miss Pamela Drake's
coming-out party Friday night.

Well, I think it would fit in
with our plans.

Ours too. Thank you--
Oh, I mean, thank you, sir.

Thank you.

You see, Mr. Henry. Mr. Drake.

Yes, indeed, sir, I see.

I think we might forget
the matter of the bill now.

- I think we might forget it indefinitely.
- Yes.

Oh, Mr. Henry, do you have
a flower shop in this hotel?

Oh, yes, sir.
A very beautiful flower shop.

Well, would you like to exchange these
for two bottles of beer?

Two--? Uh--

Oh, quite. Ahem.

Hey, step on it.
Sir Victor and his friends arrive.

The rest of the guests
are strictly carriage trade.

Millie, that's sensational.

Every seam on the beam.

If she doesn't hook the fish,
we ought to dissolve the corporation.

All you have to do is
take one look at Sir Victor. He'll melt.

There you are. Now, powder your nose
and come down...

...like you were entering snobby lobby.
Come on, gang.

Michael...

...do you think he'll ask me
to marry him tonight?

I don't see how he could help it.
I know if I were in his shoes, I would.

- Would you, Michael?
- Sure.

And I'd say, "Yes, Michael."

That's the girl.
The corporation's gonna be proud of you.

And I am personally
very grateful, Millie,

because after all,
I started this, didn't I?

Well, good luck, kid.

A casual stroll through a garden

A kiss by a lazy lagoon

Catching a breath of moonlight

Humming our favorite tune

This is a lovely way

To spend an evening

I want to save all my nights

And spend them

With you

You come down.

Are you trying to kidnap me?

No, I asked you to meet me
because I have something to ask you.

Oh?

- Frank.
- Mm-hm?

How do you feel about marriage?

Well, I think that marriage
is an institution...

that no family can do without.

Are you in love?

No.

Oh, that's wonderful.

It is?

Because now you're unbiased.

- I am?
- Sure.

Swell.

Frank, it's like this.

I've got to marry a man
but I don't love him.

Oh, that sort of thing.

Why do you have to?

Because the man I love wants me to.

- He does?
- Yes.

Isn't that an odd way for him
to show his love for you?

Oh, he doesn't love me.

- He doesn't?
- No.

- Oh. Have you told him you love him?
- No.

No?

Oh, no...

...I'm waiting for him to find out
he loves me.

- You know, I seem to be confusing you.
- Huh?

Let's sit down
and start all over again.

Now, tell me.

How does the guy you're gonna marry
feel about this thing?

Oh, he hasn't proposed yet.

What does your father say?

Mr. Drake isn't my father.

I'm just his daughter...

...temporarily.

- Until I marry the rich man.
- Rich man.

Oh, you can see
it's a desperate situation.

Oh, yes.

Very desperate situation.

- Frank.
- Mm-hm?

How would you go about
making someone fall in love with you?

Well, if it were a certain someone
I met at your house...

...I would take her
for a walk in the park.

And we would sit down, like this.

And without confusing her, I'd say:

This is a lovely way

To spend an evening

Can't think of anything

I'd rather do

This is a lovely way

To spend an evening

Can't think of anyone

As lovely as you

A casual stroll through a garden

A kiss by a lazy lagoon

Catching a breath of moonlight

Humming our favorite tune

This is a lovely way

To spend an evening

I want to save all my nights

And spend them with you

And spend them with you

- Oh, has Miss Pamela come down yet?
- Oh, she--

Tell Miss Pamela the guests are waiting
and ask her to come down now.

She's already down and out.

- Out?
- Out where?

Yes, out's a big place.

- She went out with her nightingale.
- Why didn't you say something?

The way I feel I could say something.

Yes, well, run along
and pass your things.

New girl.

Hello, Byngie.

Well, where have you been?

I went to invite my friend to the party.
You remember Mr.--

Yes, yes, we've heard
that name before.

- Oh, Mr. Drake.
- Yes.

You remember our very good friend.

Mm-hm.
- How do you do?

- How are you, Mr. Fitzroy?
- Oh, his name is Sir Victor, Millie.

- And her name is Pamela.
- Oh--

You needn't apologize.
I get my name mixed up myself sometimes.

Pamela, would you like to take a walk
in the garden?

- Oh, I'd love to.
- Good.

Sir Victor, Pamela would love
to take a walk in the garden.

Well, I should be delighted.

- Oh, Miss Keating?
- Yes?

Would you like to take a walk
in the garden?

- Well, I--
- Oh, Frank.

- Yes?
- Miss Keating would love...

- ...to take a walk in the garden.
- Well, I--

- Why, I would be delighted.
- I knew you would.

We'd have a chance
if she'd only forget that songbird.

We may have to poison his birdseed.

- Mike, would you like to take a--?
- Yes, I wanna take it right now.

- Oscar.
- Yeah.

Could you give a woman
a bit of advice?

Why, Miss Mickey, there isn't anything
that I have any more of. What's wrong?

Well, it just seems that every time
I catch a man, he catches somebody else.

Well, you just haven't
caught the right man.

But if ever I find a man,
what'll I say?

Well, you can have someone
advise you...

...that is,
when you buy a precious stone.

But when it comes to love

You're on your own

If you must have information
You can dial your telephone

But when it comes to love
You're on your own

Who asked you?

If your songbird flies without you
You can climb another tree

You know I'm simply mad about you
You're arsenic to me

There are red lights round to warn you

When you're in a danger zone

But when it comes to love
You're on your own

That romantic moon will help me

And the stars that shine above

But if that old moon won't help you

Then I'll help myself to love

I'm a parliamentary figure
I'm in favor with the throne

But when it comes to love
You're on your own

We could fly away together

- Explore the great unknown
- Explore the great unknown

- Just you and I together on our own
- Just you and I together on our own

Reel him in
We've caught a flounder

- We've got him on the hook
- Got him on the hook

If we can only land the bounder
Long enough to pick his pocketbook

With your beauty and my brainwork
We could make a lovely match

Yes, but when it comes to love
We start from scratch

I'm leaving now

Can't we fly away together
And explore the great unknown

- Just you and I together on our own
- Just you and I together on our own

Well, come on, let's have some action

Hurry up now, don't delay

Now's the time to pop the question

Break it up, scram, go away!
Go on, go on, inside, inside

If a lot of busybodies

Minded business of their own

They ought to see we want to be alone

Because when it comes to love

You're on your own

When it comes to love
You're on your own

- Oh, Cyrus.
- Oh, Georgia.

You have a talented staff.
Where did you collect them?

Oh, I just opened my pocketbook
and there they were.

- I want to ask you something.
- Yes, carry on.

Did you have more than one daughter?

Oh, well, that, of course,
I wouldn't know.

You see, my wife took care
of those matters.

Where did you find Millie?

- Millie?
- Your scullery maid.

Oh, the scullery maid.

Oh, I got her
from an old schoolmate of mine.

Where is Millie tonight?

In the scullery, I suppose.

- There's no one in the scullery.
- No?

That can't happen in my household.
I'll go put somebody there.

The cook said Millie was upstairs.

Millie upstairs?

I understand she's taking care of Emily.

Oh, yeah. Oh!

- Yes, I've forgotten all about that.
- How is Emily?

Oh, she's worse.

- Broke her leg.
- Broke her leg?

- Yes, we almost had to shoot her.
- Well, what happened?

She's been under the weather.

And coming out from under the weather,
she-- Well, she did it.

How?

Well, for example,
we'll say this is the weather.

Well, she went under it.

And coming up-- Right-- Right there.

Oh, awful.

Had to have it hemstitched.

May I say something
frightfully bromidic and mean it?

I think you're the most extraordinary girl
I have ever met.

Just lately, I've been
the most extraordinary girl I've ever met.

But I wasn't always this way.

- You weren't?
- Oh, no.

No, I was just plain and ordinary
before I became Pamela Drake.

- Before you became Pamela Drake?
- Mm-hm.

When was that?

Oh, it seems like a long time ago
although it really wasn't.

Oh, you mean you were reincarnated?

No, I was incorporated.

Incorporated?

- Is that the same thing?
- Well, not exactly.

You see, incorporated is when you are
in a corporation.

Reincarnated means that you have--
Well, you've lived before as someone else.

Oh, that's me all right.

That's you.

Say, what were you in this other life?

- A scullery maid.
- A sculler--

- You're wonderful.
- Oh, it wasn't so bad.

In fact, I think I liked it better
than being Pamela Drake.

Oh, yes. Yes.

Have you ever been re-incorporated?

Well, I've had several lives.

I mean, before I became Sir Victor--

Victor....

Victor something.

- What were you before?
- A crook.

I mean, a cook. I cooked up music.
The piano.

I'll bet that was nice.

Yes, I love music. Yeah.

- Shall we sit down?
- Uh-huh.

Tell me, Pamela,
were you married in this former life?

Oh, no.

Would you like to be in this life?

Oh, yes.

To the right man.

When the right girl meets
the right man...

...at the right time...

...everything is right...

...isn't it?

Hey, how's it going?

Pretty good so far.

- They're getting very chummy.
- Good.

Uh-oh. Looks like
he's asking her something.

- What does it look like she's saying?
- Looks like she's saying--

He's coming in the house.

Here he comes.

- Go down and get the lowdown from her.
- Okay.

Millie.

- How did it go? Have we struck pay dirt?
- He proposed.

Good work, honey.
The corporation will declare a dividend.

- When's the wedding?
- I haven't told him I would yet.

You haven't told him you would?

Michael...

...I'm in love with someone else.

Love? Now, look, honey,
don't start that routine.

You'd sacrifice all this for some guy who
probably doesn't even know you're alive?

Doesn't he, Michael?

Of course he doesn't. He's got
scullery maids in every kitchen in town.

Do you have scullery maids
in every kitchen in town?

Well, uh...

...yeah, sure.

I guess you're right, Michael.

Oscar, fanfare, please.

I want to make--

To announce my engagement
to Sir Victor Fitzroy Victor, KB, O.B.E.

- What?
- Sir Victor is very impulsive.

We're in.

Pamela...

...are you sure you know
what you're doing?

If the one you've always longed for

Seems to have a heart of stone

Remember when it's love

You're on your own

You know, miss,

I think a wedding is the happiest moment
in a girl's life, don't you?

Yes, if you're the bride.

That's the main part of the happiness.

Will the Americans call Miss Drake
Sir Lady Victor?

- Do you think anyone will care?
- Oh, you poor thing.

Well, never you mind.
He wasn't half good enough for you.

Good heavens, Sarah,
I didn't want him.

No? I thought you were highly interested.

Sarah, mother has an affinity for titles.

- Personally, I prefer Mr. Sinatra.
- Oh, that young man?

He looks just like someone
I heard on the radio.

- Are you ready?
- Yes, Mother.

Sarah, get into your hat and coat.
You're going with us.

- Me? To the wedding?
- Certainly. We're all going.

I'm sure Miss Drake
will be delighted to see you.

- Where's the bride?
- Right behind me.

- She is not.
- Huh?

Run up and get her, quick.

- Where's Millie?
- Gone in the attic.

- What for?
- To get a piece of grandmother.

- What?
- Oh, a good-luck trinket.

Something old, new, borrowed, blue
sort of thing.

- But the people in there--
- Well....

Millie.

Yes, Michael?

Millie, what are you doing up here?

I'm trying to find
something old and blue.

Millie, you can't keep everyone
waiting like this.

But I've got to find it, Michael.

It's bad luck if you don't have
something old and something new...

...and something borrowed,
something blue.

You should have thought
of that before.

- Isn't there anything blue in there?
- No.

- Come help me find it, Michael, please.
- But all those people downstairs--

Well, they won't mind waiting
another minute. Let's look here.

Oh, this is so ridiculous, Millie.
You--

Why, it's a music box.

And it still plays.

It's beautiful.

- What is the music?
- It's a minuet.

This is the music our grandparents
used to dance to.

It's so lovely.

- Hey, have you two gone nuts?
- What is this?

- A wedding or a murder mystery?
- You take a funny time to jitterbug.

You certainly do.

Come on, princess.
Sir Victor's getting agitated.

I don't want to be married
to Sir Victor.

When you're a member,
you do as the board directs you.

And besides,
if we don't marry this guy...

...how am I gonna pay
all the salaries around here?

- Come on.
- There's no hurry.

- Millie's not gonna marry Sir Victor.
- What?

- I'm calling the thing off.
- You are?

Sure, we shouldn't force a girl
to marry a man she doesn't love.

Ah, love!
This is a business proposition.

- This whole thing was your brilliant idea.
- I know. Millie's gonna marry...

- ...the songbird just the same.
- What about the corporation?

- I'm dissolving it.
- Dissolving?

- Yes.
- You can't do that.

- Besides, you're only one stockholder.
- Yeah.

I'm afraid you're gonna be voted down.

Look out.

- Take it easy now. No violence. No.
- Okay, send him.

Oh!

Well, that's that.
Now for the wedding.

Let's go.

How do you like that?

We are gathered together here
in the presence of these witnesses...

...to join this man and this woman
in the bonds of matrimony.

Do either of you know of any reason why
you should not be legally joined in marriage?

Or if there be anyone present
who can show just cause...

...why these parties
should not be legally joined together...

...let him speak now
or hereafter hold his peace.

I'm speaking
and I've got plenty to say.

Sir Victor,
you don't wanna marry Pamela.

She's in love with somebody else.

And besides, her name
is not Pamela Drake.

It's Millie Picot
and she's a scullery maid.

She's just marrying you
for your money.

Go on, Millie, tell him. Tell him.

Is that true, Pamela?

The name is Millie,
and it's very true.

That's all, folks.
Now, will everyone please scram?

Wedding gifts will be cheerfully refunded
at the front door.

Take care of it, Millie.

Okay, Michael.

That's all, folks!

You must be out of your mind.

Just dandy!

What do you think of her,
doing a thing like--

But Michael's a friend of ours!

I want you to know these are mine.
And I'm taking it, you got that?

- Oh, Mrs. Walter, this is-- This is--
- This is mine here.

Oh, all right, sir.

Mrs. Turner,
this is Mrs. Bothryn's present.

- Oh, well.
- Here.

Goodbye, all.
You're invited to our next wedding.

Hey! What is this?

What are we going to do, Mr. Drake?

- Do? We'll do Mr. O'Brien.
- I vote for that.

- Me too. Come on.
- Let's--

- Are we too late?
- Is it over?

Yup, it's all over.

- Oh, hello, Sarah.
- Hello, Mil. How are you?

Oh, I'm much better now.

Much better.

Sir Victor.

Did you know that this girl
is not Pamela Drake?

We found out just in time.

- I trust you will forgive this--
- Why, hello, Joe.

Joe? Joe who?

Why, he's Joe Brown from Newcastle.

We used to walk together every evening.
He was the pianist at the Royal Crown.

Oh, he's a sharp one, he is.

But awful entertaining,
if you know what I mean.

We know what you mean.

Mrs. Keating, I'm sure
this whole thing can be explained.

- There he is.
- Where?

Stop, stop. Stop squawking.
You haven't lost everything yet.

We're certainly indebted to you
for that trip you gave me down the elevator.

- What are you talking about?
- Does your biography tell you...

...that the Drakes ran a secret tavern
on this site?

Yeah, in 1710.

You're right about that
and about the harpsichord too.

- What are you dribbling about?
- The swellest goon trap...

...that ever caught a lush.
Step into a bankroll!

Hey, what is he talking about?

Oh, get a load of this place!

- Oh, boy, is this my house?
- Yes, let's see.

- Byngham, look at that right there.
- Look.

This can't be. Will you look at this?

Hey, look, we're rich after all.

Hey, Mike!

Do you mean to say
these casks and bottles are all full?

- Full and fancy.
- So are the spiders.

This is where the gag started
about wine, women and song.

Well, the Drakes were always first
in everything.

I bet the songs sounded terrific...

if the music was played
on this old harpsichord.

You build a stairway to the street
and you're in business.

That banker friend of yours
will finance this in a minute.

Say, that's an idea.
How does the corporation vote?

- Aye.
- Yea.

Yea! And I move
we offer Mike our apologies.

Right.
And a contract as general manager.

Well...

...thanks very much.

I accept the apology.

But I can't take the job, boss.

- Why not?
- Why not?

- I'm getting out of here.
- Getting out of here?

Say goodbye to Millie for me.

And, oh, make sure that she gets
two full shares in this.

Two?

- Yeah, hers and mine.
- Where are you going, Mike?

Why, a friend of mine
has offered me a small part in a big show.

Hey, are you falling
for that kid yourself?

So long, gang.

What are we gonna do without Mike?

We will rocket like a ball of fire

Higher and higher
and higher and higher

Good evening, ladies and gentlemen.

Once again your entertainment is coming
to you from Drake's Amsterdam Tavern.

New York's most novel nightclub.

Our famous guest star tonight
is Mr. Frank Sinatra.

Come in.

For you, Mr. O'Brien.

From the forwarding addresses,
it's been following you around.

- I got a big following.
- I like your act.

Thanks.

What?

"Reception and dinner
at Drake's Amsterdam Tavern. R.S.V.P."

How do you like that?
When's the next New York train?

- Ten o'clock through Chicago.
- Get me on it, son.

- Yeah, but how about the show?
- Never mind. I'll take care of that.

You'll sleep, brother.

Once in Manhattan

In gay old Manhattan

They used to trot a hot gavotte
To the minuet in boogie

It was quite a novelty
It was the minuet in boogie

Not the minuet in G

Oh, what a jam
There in old Amsterdam

There was plenty fun for everyone

Peter Stuyvesant was jumpin'
And they called him Solid Pete

While his wooden leg was bumpin'
To a boogie-woogie beat

Father Knickerbocker a-sittin' in his rocker
Pulled his knickerbockers up

He started rockin', nearly split a stockin'
Feelin' like a newborn pup

Mrs. Rumplemeyer really took a flyer
And the population roared

Papa was a miller, junior was a killer
Playing on the harpsichord

Now in Manhattan
While sippin' or chattin'

The modern chicks still get their kicks
When they listen to a straight beat

Lower Basin Street Quintet

Play that old Dutch treat
in eight beat

Boogie-woogie, boogie-woogie
Boogie-woogie minuet

Now in Manhattan
While sippin' or chattin'

That boogie-woogie rhythm
Has them all a-scattin'

To a one, two, three

One, two, three, four,
Five, six, seven, eight beat

Basin Street Quintet

That old Dutch treat
With a straight beat

Boogie-woogie minuet

I saw you first

Nobody else is gonna get you

I saw you first

Nobody else is gonna pet you

He used to sing to me

But that, my child, is past

Oh, yeah?
Well, I saw him first

But I've got him last

This is a lovely way

To spend an evening

There isn't anything

I'd rather do

This is a lovely way

To spend an evening

There isn't anyone

As lovely as you

- Mike O'Brien.
- Hello, Whiffin. I'll see you later.

Hello, Mike.

- Hi. Hi, Hilda.
- Oh, hello, O'Brien.

- What do you know, O'Brien?
- Hi, fellas.

Mike.

- Hello, Sandy.
- Hi, son.

How are you, boss?

What are you doing here?

Look who's here.
What do you say, boy?

Hello, Oscar.

- Welcome back.
- When did you get back in town?

Hi, kids.

- Hello, Mr. O'Brien.
- Hi, Mike.

- You're a fine guy.
- What's wrong?

Millie hasn't got any dough,
so you marry another bankroller.

Don't be silly.

You're all crossed up.
I never intended to marry Millie.

Yeah, that's just why I'm here.

But you don't understand.

That kid's never been in love
with anybody except you.

- Me?
- Yeah.

- Are you kidding?
- No.

Certainly not. Everybody knows.
Including Mrs. Drake.

Of course, you chump.
We've been looking for you for months.

Sorry, Frank. Where is she?

In the scullery.

- The scullery?
- Yes.

She's still got the lowest seniority.

- Michael.
- Millie.

- Well, what's the matter?
- I just heard that click.

Oh, you did, Michael? But--

Is your blood fizzing like ginger ale?

And do you feel like
you're walking on air?

Yes, and I heard that music.

Do you feel yourself going around?

Yes, going around with you for a long time,
a very long time.

The band had left the stand

And we were in heaven

Dancing on a cloud

Way off in the blue

The music stopped

And people were glancing

But we went on dancing

For we didn't know

Because the lights were low

And we were in love