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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:06,812 --> 00:00:08,181 Business is 2 00:00:08,215 --> 00:00:10,252 booming at the nightclub, baby! 3 00:00:10,285 --> 00:00:11,622 Cheers. 4 00:00:14,995 --> 00:00:16,732 That little tap-dancing freak that clawed 5 00:00:16,766 --> 00:00:18,077 its way out of the abdominal cavity 6 00:00:18,101 --> 00:00:19,571 of dead Colin Robinson 7 00:00:19,605 --> 00:00:21,174 is causing such a buzz. 8 00:00:21,207 --> 00:00:24,748 We are pulling in capacity crowds of vampires 9 00:00:24,782 --> 00:00:26,685 and humans night after night. 10 00:00:26,719 --> 00:00:28,623 The only real problem, apart from 11 00:00:28,656 --> 00:00:30,694 the blood sprinklers clogging yet again, 12 00:00:30,727 --> 00:00:32,564 is the fucking employees. 13 00:00:32,597 --> 00:00:34,133 How many of our patrons have died 14 00:00:34,167 --> 00:00:36,906 in wraith-related accidents in the last week alone? 15 00:00:36,939 --> 00:00:39,010 - Five. - What? Five?! 16 00:00:42,984 --> 00:00:44,555 But, you know, four of them were human. 17 00:00:44,588 --> 00:00:46,659 Yeah, okay, that's not so bad then. 18 00:00:46,692 --> 00:00:49,230 But still, what is going on with these wraiths? 19 00:00:49,263 --> 00:00:52,103 Maybe they are having issues with how 20 00:00:52,136 --> 00:00:53,740 they're being treated. 21 00:00:53,773 --> 00:00:55,142 I gave them jobs. I'd say that's 22 00:00:55,175 --> 00:00:57,581 - pretty bloody good treatment. - Yes, but you do 23 00:00:57,614 --> 00:00:59,618 make them sleep in the supply closet. 24 00:00:59,651 --> 00:01:01,097 Well, it is better than sleeping in the street. 25 00:01:01,121 --> 00:01:03,258 You can remind them of that. 26 00:01:03,291 --> 00:01:05,062 Maybe if you just listened to them 27 00:01:05,095 --> 00:01:08,101 and heard them out... Their concerns, you know, and... 28 00:01:08,135 --> 00:01:10,272 Hold it, hold it. 29 00:01:10,305 --> 00:01:11,909 Are they intentionally under performing 30 00:01:11,942 --> 00:01:13,345 in order to get their way? 31 00:01:13,378 --> 00:01:14,858 You know, it does seem like they've organized 32 00:01:14,882 --> 00:01:16,652 some sort of labor action. 33 00:01:16,685 --> 00:01:19,691 - This I know how to handle. - Ah. 34 00:01:19,725 --> 00:01:21,762 Kill them all. 35 00:02:08,789 --> 00:02:11,361 Uh, I-I forgot the words, Lazlo. 36 00:02:11,394 --> 00:02:13,031 What is this tomfoolery? 37 00:02:13,064 --> 00:02:15,637 This is a rehearsal for you, not for me. 38 00:02:15,670 --> 00:02:16,772 But, Lazzo, guess what? 39 00:02:16,806 --> 00:02:18,275 - You're tired. - I'm tired. 40 00:02:18,308 --> 00:02:20,279 I-I'm at a really good part of my book and I... 41 00:02:20,312 --> 00:02:22,016 Not the fucking book again. Give it to me. 42 00:02:22,049 --> 00:02:23,218 I-I don't have it. 43 00:02:23,251 --> 00:02:24,955 Yes, you do, boy. 44 00:02:24,988 --> 00:02:26,892 You've tucked it in the back of your trouser. 45 00:02:26,926 --> 00:02:28,930 - Give it to me. - Fine. 46 00:02:28,963 --> 00:02:31,434 Fairy tales? This is bullshit. 47 00:02:31,467 --> 00:02:34,006 And highly inaccurate. "Little Red Riding Hood"? 48 00:02:34,040 --> 00:02:35,810 You know, that's a tale about a gruesome, 49 00:02:35,844 --> 00:02:37,814 unsolved child abduction. 50 00:02:37,848 --> 00:02:39,259 That's not true. I don't believe you. 51 00:02:39,283 --> 00:02:40,787 Really? You're an expert, are you? 52 00:02:40,820 --> 00:02:43,024 What about this one, "Rumpelstiltskin"? 53 00:02:43,058 --> 00:02:44,928 "Rumpled dick skin," more like. 54 00:02:44,962 --> 00:02:46,832 You know that's how he got his name, this chap? 55 00:02:46,866 --> 00:02:49,771 - Doesn't say that in the book. - What's "dick skin"? 56 00:02:49,805 --> 00:02:51,876 What is dick skin? That's a bloody good question. 57 00:02:51,909 --> 00:02:54,146 And not one that you should be asking. 58 00:02:54,180 --> 00:02:56,251 Let's get on with the last song. 59 00:02:56,284 --> 00:02:59,156 So you will be meeting with Xerxes. 60 00:02:59,190 --> 00:03:02,129 Okay? He's the one that they've elected leader. 61 00:03:02,162 --> 00:03:03,866 - Oh! - And here he is. May I present Xerxes. 62 00:03:03,900 --> 00:03:06,271 Hello, X... rexes. 63 00:03:06,304 --> 00:03:09,076 Xerxes, why don't you start? 64 00:03:09,110 --> 00:03:11,949 He says, "Thank you for taking the time 65 00:03:11,982 --> 00:03:13,819 to work through these issues." 66 00:03:13,853 --> 00:03:15,188 Very good. Oh. 67 00:03:15,222 --> 00:03:18,161 "We have a list of demands to be addressed." 68 00:03:18,195 --> 00:03:20,867 - Fine. - "Number one." 69 00:03:20,900 --> 00:03:23,238 "We require more than one break 70 00:03:23,271 --> 00:03:25,075 "a day so that we may haunt 71 00:03:25,108 --> 00:03:27,079 the descendants of our transgressors." 72 00:03:27,112 --> 00:03:29,350 We would all like to have more time for our hobbies. 73 00:03:29,383 --> 00:03:31,956 "Number two. 74 00:03:31,989 --> 00:03:35,062 "We will not be blamed for all phantom smells at work. 75 00:03:35,095 --> 00:03:38,235 "This is an old building with old pipes, and the smells 76 00:03:38,268 --> 00:03:40,506 emanating therefrom are out of our control." 77 00:03:40,540 --> 00:03:42,142 Okay! Enough! 78 00:03:42,176 --> 00:03:44,881 I have given you and your weird faceless friends 79 00:03:44,915 --> 00:03:47,520 a job and a lovely, warm supply closet to sleep in. 80 00:03:47,554 --> 00:03:50,459 Without me, you would have nothing. 81 00:03:50,493 --> 00:03:51,996 Goodbye. Gamísou. 82 00:03:52,029 --> 00:03:54,433 I don't have time for this skatá. 83 00:03:54,467 --> 00:03:57,874 Mm. "That went well." 84 00:03:57,908 --> 00:03:59,845 Think that's supposed to be a joke. 85 00:03:59,878 --> 00:04:02,283 Wraiths aren't really known for their sense of humor. 86 00:04:02,316 --> 00:04:05,957 "'Twas upon the fourth year of the Nine Years' War 87 00:04:05,990 --> 00:04:08,863 "that the battles of Barfleur and La Hogue 88 00:04:08,896 --> 00:04:10,509 tested the will of His Majesty's fleet..." 89 00:04:10,533 --> 00:04:12,504 Can we please read one of my books? 90 00:04:12,537 --> 00:04:14,006 - Absolutely not. - Please? 91 00:04:14,040 --> 00:04:15,944 Real books about real people 92 00:04:15,977 --> 00:04:17,547 concerning real things that happened. 93 00:04:17,580 --> 00:04:20,085 Oh, Laszlo, just read him some of that baby bullshit 94 00:04:20,118 --> 00:04:21,822 - he likes so much. - Yeah, maybe the one 95 00:04:21,855 --> 00:04:23,559 about the elves and the shoemaker. 96 00:04:23,593 --> 00:04:25,295 All right. I'll tell you the real story. 97 00:04:25,329 --> 00:04:28,034 Some third-rate cobbler ripped to the tits 98 00:04:28,068 --> 00:04:31,307 on formaldehyde fumes used in his leather tanning process 99 00:04:31,341 --> 00:04:34,146 imagines he's seeing little elves do all his work. 100 00:04:34,180 --> 00:04:35,850 Loses his business, kills himself. 101 00:04:35,883 --> 00:04:36,952 The end. 102 00:04:36,986 --> 00:04:38,923 Aha! Yes! 103 00:04:38,956 --> 00:04:40,960 This will do very nicely. 104 00:04:40,994 --> 00:04:44,166 Everyone! We're going to the night market! 105 00:04:44,200 --> 00:04:47,039 A night market actually exists in every single town. 106 00:04:47,072 --> 00:04:50,445 But it is always hidden from the prying, pathetic eyes of humans. 107 00:04:50,479 --> 00:04:52,917 The night market is a bit like 108 00:04:52,951 --> 00:04:55,222 the famous Italian street fairs 109 00:04:55,255 --> 00:04:56,424 of Little Italy. 110 00:04:56,457 --> 00:04:58,061 Very diverse. 111 00:04:58,094 --> 00:05:00,500 Lots of different cultures represented. 112 00:05:00,533 --> 00:05:02,236 Sticky shit all over the ground. 113 00:05:02,269 --> 00:05:06,512 And a good place to pillage or barter tchotchkes. 114 00:05:06,545 --> 00:05:09,383 It is truly the only place where we can set aside our differences 115 00:05:09,417 --> 00:05:11,321 and work towards a common goal: 116 00:05:11,354 --> 00:05:14,293 To fuck the other guy before he fucks you! 117 00:05:14,327 --> 00:05:16,440 It's just a work thing. I'll call you after. I love... Okay. 118 00:05:16,464 --> 00:05:19,303 What do you require from the night market, my darling? 119 00:05:19,337 --> 00:05:21,407 Oh, you know, just a special little something 120 00:05:21,441 --> 00:05:23,512 to help try and solve my wraith labor problem. 121 00:05:23,546 --> 00:05:25,315 Will it be safe for someone like me to go? 122 00:05:25,349 --> 00:05:27,386 - Meaning as a human? - I don't care. 123 00:05:27,419 --> 00:05:29,099 - Yeah, do not worry, Guillermo. - Hurry up. 124 00:05:29,123 --> 00:05:31,327 If anyone asks, just say you're an orc or some shit. 125 00:05:31,361 --> 00:05:33,098 Well, I don't look like an orc. 126 00:05:34,066 --> 00:05:35,302 - Do I? - Mm. 127 00:05:35,335 --> 00:05:37,607 You could pass. 128 00:05:37,640 --> 00:05:40,278 I am very excited for this trip as well. 129 00:05:40,312 --> 00:05:41,882 Even though we live in the same house, 130 00:05:41,915 --> 00:05:44,353 it's so rare that Nandor asks me along 131 00:05:44,387 --> 00:05:46,625 when he has an outing with his friends, so... 132 00:05:46,658 --> 00:05:49,430 You know what? I changed my mind. 133 00:05:49,463 --> 00:05:52,436 - Nice work. - I think I'd rather just stay home. 134 00:05:52,469 --> 00:05:56,578 Oh, no. Marwa, this is a big fat bummer I am hearing. 135 00:05:56,612 --> 00:05:57,923 But, okay, fine. I miss you already. 136 00:05:57,947 --> 00:05:59,918 - Bye. - Come on. 137 00:05:59,951 --> 00:06:01,955 Of course Marwa is my one true love. 138 00:06:01,989 --> 00:06:04,528 But she's always hanging around. 139 00:06:04,561 --> 00:06:08,435 Sometimes it's just more fun to hang with just the boys. 140 00:06:15,550 --> 00:06:17,496 Yes. This is the one that goes to the night market. 141 00:06:17,520 --> 00:06:19,457 - Come on. Come. - Come on, boy. - I'm going. 142 00:06:19,491 --> 00:06:21,003 - Quickly, quickly. - Are you sure about this? This looks like 143 00:06:21,027 --> 00:06:23,398 a regular train full of normal people. 144 00:06:23,431 --> 00:06:25,536 How dare you question me. 145 00:06:28,141 --> 00:06:30,278 Ah. Attention, ladies and gentlemen! 146 00:06:30,312 --> 00:06:33,184 If I could just have a few moments of your time. 147 00:06:33,218 --> 00:06:35,523 I'm trying to raise money for my Uncle Jeffrey. 148 00:06:35,556 --> 00:06:36,658 He needs a new heart. 149 00:06:36,692 --> 00:06:39,296 So please enjoy this performance 150 00:06:39,330 --> 00:06:42,971 and know that anything you can give, anything, 151 00:06:43,004 --> 00:06:44,407 will help. 152 00:06:56,665 --> 00:06:58,334 Oh, wow. 153 00:07:02,276 --> 00:07:04,948 Disgusting. 154 00:07:11,461 --> 00:07:13,031 That is dynamite. 155 00:07:13,064 --> 00:07:14,467 All right! 156 00:07:14,501 --> 00:07:16,246 If you're still here, you know why you're here. 157 00:07:16,270 --> 00:07:18,208 Next stop, the night market. 158 00:07:18,241 --> 00:07:20,479 Told you. He was fantastic. Well done. 159 00:07:20,513 --> 00:07:22,459 - Are you still doing requests? - Not for a couple hours. 160 00:07:22,483 --> 00:07:25,288 - Ah. - Ooh. Looks pretty busy. 161 00:07:26,257 --> 00:07:27,392 Okay. Everyone. 162 00:07:27,426 --> 00:07:28,629 Come on, boy. Don't get lost. 163 00:07:28,662 --> 00:07:30,500 - Come on. - Exciting. 164 00:07:30,533 --> 00:07:32,169 Night market awaits. 165 00:07:32,202 --> 00:07:34,975 Holy cow. Look at all of this. 166 00:07:35,008 --> 00:07:38,114 This is pretty cool. Put that down. They're overpriced. 167 00:07:38,148 --> 00:07:40,318 Darling, maybe it's time to get you a new coffin. 168 00:07:40,352 --> 00:07:43,458 - No. - Put your kids in cages! 169 00:07:43,492 --> 00:07:44,728 Witches. 170 00:07:44,761 --> 00:07:46,464 Yes, how much for that one up there? 171 00:07:46,498 --> 00:07:48,502 - You don't need any more cages. - Shh! 172 00:07:48,536 --> 00:07:50,673 While it is progressive that the night market 173 00:07:50,706 --> 00:07:53,612 is a safe space for all of demon kind, 174 00:07:53,646 --> 00:07:55,592 sadly, we have no one form of currency between us all, 175 00:07:55,616 --> 00:07:58,121 so we have to rely on the old ways. 176 00:07:58,154 --> 00:07:59,256 Stinks. Oh. 177 00:07:59,290 --> 00:08:01,194 AKA the bartering system. 178 00:08:01,227 --> 00:08:03,131 Lots of people usually end up dead. 179 00:08:03,164 --> 00:08:04,734 I say, do you have any historical books? 180 00:08:04,768 --> 00:08:06,270 I do, sir. 181 00:08:06,304 --> 00:08:07,516 Luckily, I come from a long line 182 00:08:07,540 --> 00:08:09,544 of highly-skilled hagglers. 183 00:08:09,578 --> 00:08:11,414 My giagiá, she once traded just a little bit 184 00:08:11,447 --> 00:08:14,554 of her thigh meat for a whole bag of onions. 185 00:08:14,588 --> 00:08:17,594 So, yeah, I think I know what I'm doing. 186 00:08:17,627 --> 00:08:18,963 We're here. 187 00:08:23,037 --> 00:08:24,473 Hey, girlfriends! 188 00:08:24,508 --> 00:08:26,077 How's it hanging? 189 00:08:26,110 --> 00:08:27,747 - Ja. - Ja. 190 00:08:27,780 --> 00:08:30,218 Valkyries are a group of maidens 191 00:08:30,252 --> 00:08:32,292 who were sent by the gods to the Viking battlefields 192 00:08:32,322 --> 00:08:34,393 so they could choose who amongst the slain 193 00:08:34,426 --> 00:08:36,765 they thought was worthy of a place in Valhalla. 194 00:08:36,798 --> 00:08:39,069 They are, um, interesting folk. 195 00:08:39,103 --> 00:08:40,673 Eh. They're quite... 196 00:08:40,706 --> 00:08:42,042 They've got zero banter. 197 00:08:42,075 --> 00:08:45,048 Absolutely no laughs whatsoever. 198 00:08:46,484 --> 00:08:48,054 Okay. 199 00:08:48,087 --> 00:08:50,793 Hold on to your huvudbonader, ladies, 200 00:08:50,826 --> 00:08:54,133 because I don't think you'll find this little tasty piece 201 00:08:54,166 --> 00:08:56,638 while antiquing in Connecticut. 202 00:08:56,672 --> 00:08:59,076 Note the cobalt blue glaze. 203 00:08:59,109 --> 00:09:01,080 The white base. 204 00:09:01,113 --> 00:09:02,517 And use of porcelain interior. 205 00:09:02,550 --> 00:09:03,752 - Ja. - Ja. 206 00:09:03,786 --> 00:09:05,690 I literally 207 00:09:05,723 --> 00:09:09,129 just grabbed this from Nandor's room before I left the house. 208 00:09:09,163 --> 00:09:11,668 Now, what do your books tell you about fairies? 209 00:09:11,702 --> 00:09:15,576 Well, fairies are pretty little women that can fly around, 210 00:09:15,610 --> 00:09:17,145 and they live in mushrooms. 211 00:09:17,179 --> 00:09:18,481 Really? A likely story. 212 00:09:18,515 --> 00:09:19,751 What do we have here? 213 00:09:19,784 --> 00:09:21,588 A rancid pail of garbage. 214 00:09:22,890 --> 00:09:24,527 Hello, my beauties. 215 00:09:24,561 --> 00:09:26,097 - Laszlo! - Laszlo! - You're looking 216 00:09:26,130 --> 00:09:27,567 healthy. 217 00:09:27,600 --> 00:09:28,645 Yeah, we've been eating garbage. 218 00:09:28,669 --> 00:09:31,173 Yeah. Love to chat, but, uh 219 00:09:31,207 --> 00:09:32,442 got things to do. 220 00:09:32,476 --> 00:09:34,681 Enjoy your pile of shit. 221 00:09:34,714 --> 00:09:37,328 - Fuck off. Close the lid. - Yeah, fucking close it. - Yeah, yeah, well, I am gonna. 222 00:09:37,352 --> 00:09:38,665 - I just said that, didn't I? - Stop talking. Fucking close the lid. 223 00:09:38,689 --> 00:09:40,526 Fucking... Whoa. 224 00:09:41,828 --> 00:09:43,164 Real fairies. 225 00:09:43,197 --> 00:09:45,435 Well, go on, then. 226 00:09:45,468 --> 00:09:47,105 They smelled like shit. 227 00:09:47,139 --> 00:09:48,652 - Oh, wicker baskets. I love these! - No. 228 00:09:48,676 --> 00:09:51,147 You don't need any more wicker bask... Oh! Sorry. 229 00:09:51,180 --> 00:09:55,121 What human dare mingle amongst us? 230 00:09:55,155 --> 00:09:57,326 Uh, I'm not a human. 231 00:09:57,359 --> 00:09:58,495 Um... 232 00:09:58,529 --> 00:09:59,529 I'm an orc. 233 00:10:02,436 --> 00:10:04,874 - My mistake. Have a good one. - Yeah. 234 00:10:04,908 --> 00:10:06,778 Thank you. 235 00:10:06,812 --> 00:10:08,882 Do I really look that much like an orc? 236 00:10:08,916 --> 00:10:10,653 All right! 237 00:10:10,686 --> 00:10:12,590 Excellent. You will love this! 238 00:10:12,624 --> 00:10:14,694 - What, what is this? - This is the familiar fights! 239 00:10:14,728 --> 00:10:17,366 - Wait, what? - I haven't been to one of these in ages. 240 00:10:17,399 --> 00:10:19,470 And another sort of weak, 241 00:10:19,504 --> 00:10:21,307 flailing blow to the paunch. 242 00:10:21,340 --> 00:10:23,478 Neither of these two in any condition to be fighting. 243 00:10:23,512 --> 00:10:26,551 Basically, a vampire will say, "I have the toughest familiar." 244 00:10:26,585 --> 00:10:27,896 And then another vampire will be like, 245 00:10:27,920 --> 00:10:29,924 "No, my familiar is even tougher." 246 00:10:29,958 --> 00:10:32,597 And then they get the familiars to fight each other, 247 00:10:32,630 --> 00:10:35,144 and whichever familiar kicks the shit out of the other familiar, 248 00:10:35,168 --> 00:10:36,470 he is the winner. 249 00:10:36,505 --> 00:10:37,840 That sounds absolutely terrible. 250 00:10:37,874 --> 00:10:39,310 Crush his bones! Yeah! 251 00:10:39,343 --> 00:10:40,513 Look at him go. 252 00:10:40,546 --> 00:10:42,617 That's got to not hurt that much. 253 00:10:42,650 --> 00:10:45,155 Oh, yeah. I think we should break the arm. 254 00:10:45,188 --> 00:10:46,525 Break his arm! 255 00:10:46,558 --> 00:10:47,927 - Don't break his arm. - Oh! 256 00:10:47,960 --> 00:10:49,239 That's nothing. In the old days, 257 00:10:49,263 --> 00:10:51,233 they used to tear the head off. 258 00:10:51,267 --> 00:10:53,438 What are we thinking, folks? Should we do the head? 259 00:10:53,471 --> 00:10:55,551 - Oh, great, they're still doing that. Yes! - Oh, no. 260 00:10:55,576 --> 00:10:57,422 - No, shouldn't do the head. - Head! Head! Head! Head! 261 00:10:57,446 --> 00:11:00,418 Head! Head! Head! Head! Head! Head! 262 00:11:00,452 --> 00:11:01,855 Head! Head! Head! 263 00:11:01,888 --> 00:11:04,794 Head! Head! Head! Head! Head! Head! Head... 264 00:11:04,828 --> 00:11:06,263 I think I want to do the head. 265 00:11:06,297 --> 00:11:07,800 - Yay! - Head! Head! Head! Head! 266 00:11:10,840 --> 00:11:12,643 Give it up for our new familiar 267 00:11:12,677 --> 00:11:14,681 champion, this piece of shit right here. 268 00:11:14,714 --> 00:11:16,661 How are you supporting this? It's so wrong in so many ways. 269 00:11:16,685 --> 00:11:18,287 You're right, it is. 270 00:11:18,321 --> 00:11:20,291 'Cause you could take any of these guys. 271 00:11:20,325 --> 00:11:22,229 - That's besides the point. - Hey! 272 00:11:22,262 --> 00:11:24,601 This vampire here thinks that his familiar 273 00:11:24,634 --> 00:11:26,671 can beat any of our familiars! 274 00:11:29,309 --> 00:11:30,749 - Prove it! - Take off that tailcoat. 275 00:11:30,780 --> 00:11:32,517 - Yes, okay, let's do it, come on. - No. 276 00:11:32,550 --> 00:11:33,895 I'm not gonna do it. I'm not doing it. 277 00:11:33,919 --> 00:11:35,556 - Come on, let's do it. - I'm not 278 00:11:35,589 --> 00:11:37,493 - doing it. - Right. 279 00:11:37,527 --> 00:11:38,829 Uh, no, no. 280 00:11:38,862 --> 00:11:41,300 My familiar will not be fighting tonight. 281 00:11:42,904 --> 00:11:44,641 Boring! 282 00:11:44,674 --> 00:11:47,513 Why? Is the little guy scared? 283 00:11:47,547 --> 00:11:49,918 - No! - No, Master 284 00:11:49,951 --> 00:11:51,822 the only thing my familiar is scared of 285 00:11:51,855 --> 00:11:53,892 is beating all of your familiars 286 00:11:53,926 --> 00:11:57,466 all at once, 'cause that's how tough my familiar is. 287 00:11:57,500 --> 00:11:58,802 Keep dreaming! 288 00:11:58,836 --> 00:11:59,847 Oh, them's fighting words. 289 00:11:59,871 --> 00:12:01,373 Why did you say that? 290 00:12:01,407 --> 00:12:02,610 They insulted you, Guillermo. 291 00:12:02,643 --> 00:12:04,748 And insulting you is insulting me. 292 00:12:04,781 --> 00:12:06,484 It is a matter of honor now. 293 00:12:06,518 --> 00:12:08,287 - Okay, he wants in! - He wants in! Oh! 294 00:12:08,321 --> 00:12:09,758 He's gonna get it! 295 00:12:09,791 --> 00:12:10,893 You're gonna get it. 296 00:12:10,926 --> 00:12:12,830 What's your name, little buddy? 297 00:12:12,864 --> 00:12:14,701 - No one gives a shit. - Let's fight. 298 00:12:22,449 --> 00:12:23,762 So, my trading is going very well. 299 00:12:23,786 --> 00:12:25,355 To the Valkyries I gave 300 00:12:25,388 --> 00:12:26,958 the vase, and then they gave me 301 00:12:26,992 --> 00:12:28,829 their rarest delicacy... 302 00:12:28,862 --> 00:12:30,900 The little meatballs in the brown water. 303 00:12:30,933 --> 00:12:34,006 I don't know why Valkyries sell meatballs 304 00:12:34,039 --> 00:12:36,477 and furniture, but I'm not going to criticize 305 00:12:36,511 --> 00:12:38,047 the ways of other cultures. 306 00:12:38,080 --> 00:12:39,316 The little tiny meatballs, 307 00:12:39,349 --> 00:12:40,553 I traded with the Imps, 308 00:12:40,586 --> 00:12:42,623 'cause the Imps love tiny foods. 309 00:12:42,657 --> 00:12:44,794 Thanks, guys. 310 00:12:44,828 --> 00:12:46,464 It's a comedy T-shirt! 311 00:12:46,498 --> 00:12:48,869 I just know that there's going to be someone 312 00:12:48,902 --> 00:12:50,906 who very much wants to trade for this. 313 00:12:50,940 --> 00:12:52,442 You got this, Guillermo! 314 00:12:53,712 --> 00:12:55,950 Just hit him! Just hit him! 315 00:12:55,983 --> 00:12:58,589 That's got to be the Dodge of the Night... Dodge of the Night, 316 00:12:58,622 --> 00:13:00,458 brought to you by Dodge Ram trucks. 317 00:13:00,493 --> 00:13:02,438 Check out the new 2022 Ram Pickup at your local... 318 00:13:02,462 --> 00:13:03,902 Look, I don't want to hurt you, okay? 319 00:13:03,932 --> 00:13:05,468 Don't run away from him! 320 00:13:05,503 --> 00:13:07,005 Hit him! 321 00:13:07,038 --> 00:13:08,542 Whoa! 322 00:13:08,575 --> 00:13:10,078 That little fucker can move. 323 00:13:10,111 --> 00:13:11,848 Sorry. Are you okay? 324 00:13:11,882 --> 00:13:13,785 - That's my fucking guy! - I didn't touch him. 325 00:13:13,819 --> 00:13:15,321 He did it to himself, okay? 326 00:13:15,355 --> 00:13:16,791 Zero blows taken, zero landed. 327 00:13:16,825 --> 00:13:18,562 They can't all be bloodbaths, folks. 328 00:13:18,595 --> 00:13:21,033 But we have ourselves 329 00:13:21,066 --> 00:13:23,639 - a new winner... this guy! - Yes! Suck it! 330 00:13:23,672 --> 00:13:25,576 - Suck it! - Let's have 331 00:13:25,609 --> 00:13:27,312 another fight. Hopefully he dies. 332 00:13:30,051 --> 00:13:32,455 Now, my point is, sometimes 333 00:13:32,489 --> 00:13:34,761 grownups lie to children when the truth 334 00:13:34,794 --> 00:13:36,765 is too horrifying for them. 335 00:13:36,798 --> 00:13:39,336 - For instance, that Pinocchio there. - Whoa. 336 00:13:39,369 --> 00:13:41,842 See his nose... don't stare... It's just a medical condition. 337 00:13:41,875 --> 00:13:43,846 - It's got bugger all to do with lying. - Oh. 338 00:13:43,879 --> 00:13:46,585 - And as far as I know, he was never a puppet. - Okay. 339 00:13:46,618 --> 00:13:48,956 - Behind us, see those garden gnomes? - Yeah. 340 00:13:48,989 --> 00:13:51,628 Well, they're real. Think they look happy? I guess. 341 00:13:51,661 --> 00:13:53,464 They're not. They're shit scared. 342 00:13:53,499 --> 00:13:56,003 - You stare at them, they freeze. - That's sad. 343 00:13:56,036 --> 00:13:58,407 And sometimes grownups lie to children 344 00:13:58,441 --> 00:14:00,579 - 'cause the truth is just so boring. - Okay. 345 00:14:00,613 --> 00:14:03,552 - Now, you've read The Emperor's New Clothes, right? - Uh-huh. 346 00:14:03,585 --> 00:14:04,988 Well, here's one now. 347 00:14:05,021 --> 00:14:06,892 So, he's just a common German nudist. 348 00:14:06,925 --> 00:14:09,697 And behind him is a witch. 349 00:14:09,731 --> 00:14:11,968 They're very real, and one day, they'll fight 350 00:14:12,002 --> 00:14:13,805 - to get hold of your semen. - Oh. 351 00:14:13,839 --> 00:14:16,143 - But not in a fun way. - What's semen? 352 00:14:17,880 --> 00:14:20,653 Hit him! Hit him! 353 00:14:20,686 --> 00:14:22,557 I'm not gonna hit him, okay? 354 00:14:22,590 --> 00:14:24,661 Okay, that was really close to my face. 355 00:14:24,694 --> 00:14:26,865 Come on, don't play with our food. 356 00:14:26,898 --> 00:14:28,835 For me, just him just once! 357 00:14:28,869 --> 00:14:32,442 And another high-flying Capoeira kick that does nothing. 358 00:14:32,475 --> 00:14:33,855 Look, we don't have to do this, okay? 359 00:14:33,879 --> 00:14:35,749 We're both familiars. 360 00:14:35,783 --> 00:14:37,461 - So why don't we just sha... - Smoke in the face. 361 00:14:37,485 --> 00:14:38,932 - That's got to hurt. - Don't let him do that, hey! 362 00:14:38,956 --> 00:14:41,528 Whoa! Oh! What the... 363 00:14:41,561 --> 00:14:44,032 I'm just trying to talk to you like a regular person. 364 00:14:44,066 --> 00:14:46,504 You're being kind of a fucking dick, okay? 365 00:14:46,538 --> 00:14:48,484 - Yeah, now hit him! - Look, we don't have to do this. We're both human. 366 00:14:48,508 --> 00:14:50,879 - Come on! - Okay! Are you okay?! 367 00:14:50,913 --> 00:14:52,850 You're dead! Finish him! Hit him! 368 00:14:52,883 --> 00:14:54,897 Now it seems like the hot one's running out of steam. 369 00:14:54,921 --> 00:14:56,591 Are you okay? 370 00:14:56,625 --> 00:14:58,203 Stop talking to him and just hit him, Guillermo! 371 00:14:58,227 --> 00:15:00,107 You know, nowadays there's really no reason to smoke. 372 00:15:00,131 --> 00:15:01,968 He's going down! Hit him! 373 00:15:02,002 --> 00:15:03,481 Now our familiar's having an asthma attack. 374 00:15:03,505 --> 00:15:05,509 - Is there a doctor? - Ay... 375 00:15:05,542 --> 00:15:07,479 Is someone a doctor? Somebody? 376 00:15:07,513 --> 00:15:08,481 We're not hurting anyone to... 377 00:15:08,515 --> 00:15:10,151 Aw, fuck. 378 00:15:10,184 --> 00:15:11,688 And we have ourselves a winner again. 379 00:15:11,721 --> 00:15:12,924 Suck it! 380 00:15:12,957 --> 00:15:14,202 - You suck it! You suck it! - Yay. 381 00:15:14,226 --> 00:15:16,531 He won again. Yay. 382 00:15:16,564 --> 00:15:18,067 It's this way. 383 00:15:18,100 --> 00:15:20,806 So, the night market kind of goes on forever. 384 00:15:20,839 --> 00:15:22,677 Afternoon. 385 00:15:22,710 --> 00:15:25,849 It's sort of infinite and it has dark, dirtier sides. 386 00:15:25,883 --> 00:15:27,452 Bit like me. 387 00:15:27,485 --> 00:15:30,024 Nice place. 388 00:15:30,058 --> 00:15:32,797 Just gonna take a little look around or whatever. 389 00:15:32,830 --> 00:15:35,468 Small skull, nice. 390 00:15:39,476 --> 00:15:41,581 You got some nice stuff. 391 00:15:41,615 --> 00:15:44,152 Not what I'm looking for, though. 392 00:15:44,186 --> 00:15:46,758 I think what I'm looking for 393 00:15:46,791 --> 00:15:50,465 might be something that you might put under the counter. 394 00:15:50,499 --> 00:15:52,703 How do I know you're not with some form 395 00:15:52,737 --> 00:15:54,841 of law enforcement? 396 00:15:54,874 --> 00:15:57,145 Hey! Fuck you, man. 397 00:15:57,178 --> 00:15:59,717 Would a cop have this? 398 00:15:59,751 --> 00:16:02,489 A piece of clothing with a very misogynistic joke 399 00:16:02,523 --> 00:16:04,459 that makes a complete mockery 400 00:16:04,494 --> 00:16:06,798 of common traffic safety laws. 401 00:16:13,010 --> 00:16:15,783 - Huh? Huh? - The bitch fell off. 402 00:16:15,816 --> 00:16:17,820 I think even my bitch would get a kick out of that. 403 00:16:17,853 --> 00:16:19,089 Yeah, she would. 404 00:16:19,122 --> 00:16:21,594 All right, you give me that shirt, 405 00:16:21,628 --> 00:16:23,598 I got what you're looking for. 406 00:16:23,632 --> 00:16:25,168 - I need eyes on it. - All right. 407 00:16:25,201 --> 00:16:26,671 Keep your knickers on. 408 00:16:26,705 --> 00:16:28,140 Let me have a look down here. 409 00:16:28,174 --> 00:16:29,544 Here we go. 410 00:16:29,577 --> 00:16:31,581 I think, uh, this 411 00:16:31,614 --> 00:16:33,217 is up your alley. 412 00:16:33,250 --> 00:16:35,756 We have a deal! Take the stupid shirt. 413 00:16:35,789 --> 00:16:37,158 - Yes! - We got a winner. 414 00:16:37,192 --> 00:16:38,705 He stole her glasses and she couldn't see. 415 00:16:38,729 --> 00:16:40,264 Boring. 416 00:16:40,298 --> 00:16:41,901 Give me my glasses back. 417 00:16:41,935 --> 00:16:45,576 I'm gonna give your glasses to your master. 418 00:16:45,609 --> 00:16:48,648 - Lot of jawboning going on. - Okay? 419 00:16:48,682 --> 00:16:50,919 Here you go. It was nice meeting you, okay? 420 00:16:50,953 --> 00:16:53,759 A little less hot air, but I present to you 421 00:16:53,792 --> 00:16:57,032 our new familiar champion, this guy right here. 422 00:16:57,065 --> 00:16:59,302 Never caught his name, never caught his name. 423 00:16:59,336 --> 00:17:01,708 And as a reward, 424 00:17:01,741 --> 00:17:03,812 what we all know humans love most. 425 00:17:03,845 --> 00:17:05,682 Some dried-up dog food. 426 00:17:05,716 --> 00:17:07,052 They love that shit. 427 00:17:07,085 --> 00:17:09,256 They love it. And now 428 00:17:09,289 --> 00:17:12,095 - it is time for our main event. - Yes. 429 00:17:12,128 --> 00:17:15,034 - Our champion familiar versus... - Oh, come on. 430 00:17:15,068 --> 00:17:17,172 Our champion vampire, 431 00:17:17,205 --> 00:17:19,042 Gorgo the Murderer! 432 00:17:19,076 --> 00:17:20,946 Look at him! 433 00:17:20,979 --> 00:17:22,983 I'm gonna murder you so fucking hard. 434 00:17:23,017 --> 00:17:25,723 - Undefeated when it comes to murder. - Aah! 435 00:17:25,756 --> 00:17:27,860 Give us one moment. 436 00:17:27,893 --> 00:17:29,931 Murder him! Murder him... 437 00:17:29,964 --> 00:17:31,601 You shouldn't fight this guy. 438 00:17:31,634 --> 00:17:33,080 This is a guy that's gonna rip your head clean off. 439 00:17:33,104 --> 00:17:35,041 Actually, he's not. He's a vampire. 440 00:17:35,074 --> 00:17:36,845 And, remember, I'm a vampire-killer. 441 00:17:36,878 --> 00:17:38,915 Oh, yes, I always forget that. 442 00:17:38,949 --> 00:17:40,586 Okay then, go kill him! Go kill him! 443 00:17:40,619 --> 00:17:41,588 Go kill him! Go! 444 00:17:41,621 --> 00:17:42,823 Just one second. 445 00:17:42,857 --> 00:17:44,226 Sorry, once second. What? 446 00:17:45,261 --> 00:17:47,308 What's gonna happen when a room full of vampires sees 447 00:17:47,332 --> 00:17:49,871 a familiar kill a vampire for the first time? 448 00:17:49,904 --> 00:17:51,708 Good point. Wait. 449 00:17:51,741 --> 00:17:53,177 I think I have an idea. 450 00:17:53,210 --> 00:17:55,716 - We leave? - No. 451 00:17:55,749 --> 00:17:59,791 Vampires! 452 00:17:59,824 --> 00:18:01,160 Can I just... Give me that. 453 00:18:01,193 --> 00:18:03,665 Vampires, a fight 454 00:18:03,698 --> 00:18:05,869 between this poor familiar 455 00:18:07,706 --> 00:18:09,877 my closest companion for 13 years? 456 00:18:09,911 --> 00:18:11,948 - Yeah! - Against this 457 00:18:11,981 --> 00:18:14,620 ruthless vampire? 458 00:18:14,654 --> 00:18:16,223 This is sick! This is... 459 00:18:16,256 --> 00:18:18,628 Sorry. Can I just... 460 00:18:18,662 --> 00:18:20,833 Thank you. This is... Not you. 461 00:18:20,866 --> 00:18:22,202 This is sick! 462 00:18:22,235 --> 00:18:24,039 But you know what would 463 00:18:24,072 --> 00:18:25,776 be even more sick? 464 00:18:25,809 --> 00:18:28,080 - What? - A battle 465 00:18:28,114 --> 00:18:29,650 between him 466 00:18:29,684 --> 00:18:31,220 and me. 467 00:18:32,857 --> 00:18:34,259 Who wants to see me pulverize 468 00:18:34,292 --> 00:18:36,631 my closest companion of 13 years? 469 00:18:36,664 --> 00:18:38,768 - Yeah! - Who wants to see that? 470 00:18:38,802 --> 00:18:40,204 Kill your friend! 471 00:18:40,238 --> 00:18:43,912 Kill your friend! Kill your friend... 472 00:18:43,945 --> 00:18:46,216 Right! I'm going to kill my friend! 473 00:18:46,250 --> 00:18:48,087 Kill your friend! Kill your friend! 474 00:18:53,164 --> 00:18:54,877 Oh, this isn't gonna take very long, ladies and germs. 475 00:18:54,901 --> 00:18:56,403 Kill my friend. 476 00:18:56,436 --> 00:18:58,842 Kill your friend... That's what we all want to see. 477 00:18:58,875 --> 00:19:00,712 All right, here we go, baby! 478 00:19:00,746 --> 00:19:02,817 - Circling... - Kill your friend! Kill your friend 479 00:19:02,850 --> 00:19:05,722 - circling... - I'm not gonna hurt you, Guillermo. 480 00:19:05,756 --> 00:19:07,334 I'm just gonna take you out with one punch, 481 00:19:07,358 --> 00:19:08,995 and then carry your body away. 482 00:19:09,029 --> 00:19:10,799 Don't you think we should put on 483 00:19:10,833 --> 00:19:12,211 a little bit of a show for them, at least? 484 00:19:12,235 --> 00:19:14,239 It's implausible that it would take any longer 485 00:19:14,272 --> 00:19:16,410 than five seconds for me to beat you. 486 00:19:16,443 --> 00:19:19,382 Is it, though? I mean, remember last time? 487 00:19:19,416 --> 00:19:21,688 Hey! 488 00:19:21,721 --> 00:19:24,125 Please, I let you win to teach you a lesson. 489 00:19:24,159 --> 00:19:26,831 And, anyway, you did cheat just a little bit. 490 00:19:26,865 --> 00:19:28,367 I didn't cheat. 491 00:19:28,400 --> 00:19:29,737 You did just a little bit. 492 00:19:29,770 --> 00:19:31,173 I didn't have to. 493 00:19:31,206 --> 00:19:33,143 - Come on, this is boring! - Okay 494 00:19:33,177 --> 00:19:35,348 little man, bring your best. 495 00:19:37,720 --> 00:19:40,792 Okay, looks like the little guy's voguing now. 496 00:19:40,826 --> 00:19:42,796 Whoa! 497 00:19:42,830 --> 00:19:45,268 We got stakes! We got stakes. 498 00:19:45,301 --> 00:19:47,372 - You cheeky little shit! - Oh, the stakes are high. 499 00:19:47,405 --> 00:19:50,779 - Come here! - Oh, we got ourselves a fight, ladies and gentlemen. 500 00:19:50,812 --> 00:19:53,317 We got ourselves a fight. 501 00:19:53,350 --> 00:19:55,054 Come on, kill your friend. 502 00:19:55,087 --> 00:19:56,991 Oh, and we're doing flips... 503 00:19:57,025 --> 00:19:58,962 He killed my friend. 504 00:19:58,995 --> 00:20:00,140 - What the fuck? - That was a mistake. 505 00:20:00,164 --> 00:20:01,333 Stop throwing stakes. 506 00:20:01,366 --> 00:20:03,370 - It's rude. - Keep going, or... 507 00:20:03,404 --> 00:20:05,909 Eh. 508 00:20:05,943 --> 00:20:08,180 Holy shit, he's Phantom Menacing. 509 00:20:08,214 --> 00:20:10,484 Lot of flash. 510 00:20:10,519 --> 00:20:12,856 Regular Darth Maul, Jr. Over here. 511 00:20:12,890 --> 00:20:15,796 I call him Darth Small. 512 00:20:15,829 --> 00:20:17,332 - Whoa! - Aah! 513 00:20:17,365 --> 00:20:19,002 Boom goes the dynamite! 514 00:20:19,035 --> 00:20:20,939 I am the winner! 515 00:20:20,973 --> 00:20:22,284 Uhp, and look, and there he goes. He's on the run. 516 00:20:22,308 --> 00:20:23,845 That's right, you don't fuck with me! 517 00:20:23,878 --> 00:20:25,314 Dumb move to run from a vampire. 518 00:20:25,348 --> 00:20:27,485 - I am the winner! - Then again, he is a familiar. 519 00:20:27,519 --> 00:20:30,091 And they're known for being dumb pieces of shit. 520 00:20:30,124 --> 00:20:31,794 Uh, your friend's up there. 521 00:20:31,828 --> 00:20:33,063 The fuck? 522 00:20:33,097 --> 00:20:35,234 There he is, go! Kill him! 523 00:20:35,268 --> 00:20:37,773 - Murder him! - Oh. 524 00:20:37,806 --> 00:20:40,244 That's nice. How much for this one? 525 00:20:41,814 --> 00:20:43,417 It's getting slicey. 526 00:20:43,450 --> 00:20:45,789 We got a sword fight. 527 00:20:45,822 --> 00:20:47,425 Getting a little edgy. Whoa! 528 00:20:47,458 --> 00:20:49,897 Collateral damage, but we love to see it, folks. 529 00:20:49,931 --> 00:20:51,400 - Look what you made me do! - What? 530 00:20:51,433 --> 00:20:54,540 Guillermo, you're really starting to piss me off! 531 00:20:54,573 --> 00:20:56,419 - Now he's swinging. - It was your idea, remember?! 532 00:20:56,443 --> 00:20:58,380 - Get back here! - This is your plan! 533 00:20:58,414 --> 00:21:01,019 - Stop hiding behind Greg! - Why are you mad at me? 534 00:21:01,053 --> 00:21:03,290 - Sorry, can I... - Is this still part of the game? 535 00:21:03,324 --> 00:21:05,361 - Fuck you! - Now we're getting somewhere. 536 00:21:05,394 --> 00:21:08,300 Okay, that fucking hurts, you fucking dick! 537 00:21:08,334 --> 00:21:09,971 Ah, you're disarmed! 538 00:21:12,408 --> 00:21:15,114 Get back. 539 00:21:15,147 --> 00:21:17,485 - Aah! - Shit. 540 00:21:17,519 --> 00:21:19,957 I guess Peter Pan can't fly. 541 00:21:19,991 --> 00:21:21,961 Oopsies. 542 00:21:21,995 --> 00:21:24,399 A predictable end, but an end 543 00:21:24,432 --> 00:21:26,036 - nonetheless. - Yeah! 544 00:21:26,069 --> 00:21:28,474 - Are you not entertained? - I killed my friend! 545 00:21:28,508 --> 00:21:30,244 I killed my friend! 546 00:21:30,277 --> 00:21:32,248 I may have killed my friend. 547 00:21:32,281 --> 00:21:34,285 Oh, shit! He's got a shovel! 548 00:21:34,319 --> 00:21:36,824 Hey-oh! 549 00:21:39,129 --> 00:21:42,101 Finish him! Finish him! 550 00:21:42,135 --> 00:21:44,372 Finish him! 551 00:21:44,406 --> 00:21:46,544 Finish him! Finish him! 552 00:21:46,577 --> 00:21:48,581 They are right, Guillermo. 553 00:21:48,615 --> 00:21:50,585 Finish me. 554 00:21:50,619 --> 00:21:53,858 - Finish him! Finish him! - Finish that motherfucker! 555 00:21:53,892 --> 00:21:55,394 Finish me! 556 00:21:55,428 --> 00:21:57,332 What kind of a vampire am I 557 00:21:57,365 --> 00:21:59,937 if cannot even defeat my own familiar?! 558 00:21:59,970 --> 00:22:01,507 I'm not gonna finish anyone, okay? 559 00:22:01,541 --> 00:22:03,511 I'm gonna let you win. 560 00:22:03,545 --> 00:22:06,551 I don't really want to kill you, but if it is the only way, 561 00:22:06,584 --> 00:22:09,122 - then thank you. - What? No. 562 00:22:09,155 --> 00:22:10,859 I don't mean really kill me. 563 00:22:10,892 --> 00:22:12,304 Just, like, pretend to snap my neck or something, 564 00:22:12,328 --> 00:22:14,099 so we can get the hell out of here. 565 00:22:14,132 --> 00:22:15,545 - That's a much better plan. - I want to see 566 00:22:15,569 --> 00:22:17,138 - the blood! - Ready? - Ready. 567 00:22:17,171 --> 00:22:20,077 Hey! 568 00:22:20,111 --> 00:22:23,083 Snap! Oh! Oh, oh, oh! 569 00:22:23,117 --> 00:22:25,522 He's dead as a doornail. 570 00:22:25,555 --> 00:22:28,561 Dead as doornail, ladies and gentlemen. 571 00:22:28,595 --> 00:22:31,501 We learned a lot tonight here at familiar fights. 572 00:22:31,534 --> 00:22:33,437 A lot about friendship, and how stupid 573 00:22:33,470 --> 00:22:35,241 and false and artificial it is. 574 00:22:35,274 --> 00:22:37,011 - You okay? - Hey, folks, make sure 575 00:22:37,045 --> 00:22:39,085 to take your familiar corpses with you as you leave. 576 00:22:44,125 --> 00:22:46,463 One moment, I'll be right with you, Xerxes. 577 00:22:46,497 --> 00:22:48,935 So 578 00:22:48,968 --> 00:22:51,073 We went to the night market last night. 579 00:22:51,106 --> 00:22:54,547 Oh, my, the night market, what fun. 580 00:22:54,580 --> 00:22:57,018 - Mm. - I already had plans last night, 581 00:22:57,051 --> 00:22:59,222 so it's a good thing I didn't get invited. 582 00:22:59,255 --> 00:23:01,326 And, here, I got you a gift. 583 00:23:01,359 --> 00:23:04,533 It came with these weird vials of whatever this is. 584 00:23:04,567 --> 00:23:07,438 I think I'll probably just keep all of these. 585 00:23:07,472 --> 00:23:10,177 And you can use the box to store your brooches or whatever. 586 00:23:10,211 --> 00:23:12,950 This is for me? This is so kind. 587 00:23:12,983 --> 00:23:15,221 I am very kind. Very good boss. 588 00:23:15,254 --> 00:23:17,458 I cannot remember the last time 589 00:23:17,493 --> 00:23:19,329 someone got me a gift. 590 00:23:19,362 --> 00:23:21,099 And I do have a lot of brooches. 591 00:23:21,133 --> 00:23:23,905 - I didn't think anyone noticed... - Oh! 592 00:23:23,938 --> 00:23:25,241 You have detected 593 00:23:25,274 --> 00:23:27,278 the sweet, intoxicating scent of the... 594 00:23:27,311 --> 00:23:29,449 Water Lily of The Nile. 595 00:23:29,482 --> 00:23:31,687 - Haven't you, Xerxes? - Uh-oh. 596 00:23:31,721 --> 00:23:33,090 Water Lily 597 00:23:33,123 --> 00:23:34,159 of the Nile. 598 00:23:34,192 --> 00:23:35,261 That is what they call it. 599 00:23:35,294 --> 00:23:36,998 It's a medicinal flower. 600 00:23:37,031 --> 00:23:39,002 It's a narcotic that the Egyptians 601 00:23:39,035 --> 00:23:41,072 used to bury with their dead in order 602 00:23:41,106 --> 00:23:43,410 to help ease the sufferings of the afterlife. 603 00:23:43,444 --> 00:23:45,982 And according to the Compendium Narcoticum, 604 00:23:46,016 --> 00:23:48,621 - Some third-rate cobbler... - it is the only drug 605 00:23:48,655 --> 00:23:50,625 that helps with the pain of being a wraith. 606 00:23:50,659 --> 00:23:52,261 Very hard to come by. 607 00:23:52,295 --> 00:23:54,065 And it is said 608 00:23:54,099 --> 00:23:56,537 that those little gobshites will do anything for it. 609 00:23:57,539 --> 00:24:01,146 Do I have enough of these to give to all of the wraiths? No. 610 00:24:01,179 --> 00:24:03,685 Do I have enough of these to give to the one wraith 611 00:24:03,718 --> 00:24:06,223 who tells all the other wraiths what to do? 612 00:24:06,256 --> 00:24:08,227 Maybe. 613 00:24:08,260 --> 00:24:11,233 I think that is probably all I need. 614 00:24:11,266 --> 00:24:13,170 Don't you?! 615 00:24:13,203 --> 00:24:15,007 He won't do it. 616 00:24:15,040 --> 00:24:16,644 Union solidarity is a big deal to them. 617 00:24:16,677 --> 00:24:18,515 "We have a deal." 618 00:24:18,548 --> 00:24:20,484 There you go. Pleasure doing business with you. 619 00:24:20,519 --> 00:24:22,121 That's how it's done. 620 00:24:23,423 --> 00:24:26,363 I don't think they're happy. 621 00:24:26,396 --> 00:24:30,204 If they all vote, he can overrule them, right? 622 00:24:30,237 --> 00:24:32,643 What? 623 00:24:32,676 --> 00:24:34,012 Oh! 624 00:24:34,045 --> 00:24:36,717 Oh, no! 625 00:24:36,751 --> 00:24:38,755 Mm, shit, shit, shit. 626 00:24:38,788 --> 00:24:42,161 "Xerxes is no longer our leader. 627 00:24:42,195 --> 00:24:45,134 Also, he is dead." Obviously. 628 00:24:45,167 --> 00:24:46,637 Fine! Fuck it! 629 00:24:46,671 --> 00:24:48,708 You can have Mondays off with pay. 630 00:24:48,741 --> 00:24:50,244 And I will build you five 631 00:24:50,277 --> 00:24:52,114 new supply closets for you to sleep in. 632 00:24:56,757 --> 00:24:58,995 Now get back to work! 633 00:25:01,266 --> 00:25:03,003 There we go. 634 00:25:03,036 --> 00:25:04,573 I know you've had a disappointing day, 635 00:25:04,607 --> 00:25:07,144 so no rehearsal tonight. 636 00:25:07,178 --> 00:25:09,583 Would you like me to read one of your fairy stories to you? 637 00:25:09,617 --> 00:25:11,453 Uh, that's okay. I-I don't think 638 00:25:11,486 --> 00:25:13,658 I want to read those anymore. 639 00:25:13,691 --> 00:25:15,795 Maybe, can you read me something 640 00:25:15,829 --> 00:25:18,333 from one of your real books about real stuff? 641 00:25:18,367 --> 00:25:20,271 I thought you'd never ask. 642 00:25:22,543 --> 00:25:25,414 One of my personal favorites. Oh, yes. 643 00:25:25,447 --> 00:25:28,186 "The village of Holcomb stands 644 00:25:28,220 --> 00:25:31,494 "on the high wheat plains of western Kansas, 645 00:25:31,527 --> 00:25:35,067 a lonesome area that other Kansans call 'out there.'" 646 00:25:35,100 --> 00:25:37,338 - Are you still awake? - Um, yeah. 647 00:25:37,371 --> 00:25:39,610 It gets very heavy from here on in. 648 00:26:22,629 --> 00:26:26,132 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org 47204

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