All language subtitles for The.Heyday.Of.The.Insensitive.Bastards.2015.720p.WEBRip.x264.AAC-[YTS.MX]

This is the closest I can come
to saying what I have learned

there's no shortage of
consequence in my life

we need to leave some evidence,

a little of us everywhere

I spent all my time staring in
one direction

and I missed it

the most important moments

were in the edges

there were seven of them.

Over there

turn around!

Conrad?

You are going to have to drive

you know, you are
really bleeding

get in the car, come on!

Hit a deer on the way here

- clipped her really

she went flying headfirst into a
snowdrift,

was not breathing so I took
the defibrillator over to her

next thing I know she is wide
awake

and she kicks me in the
face-Jesus!

You are bleeding pretty badly you sure you
do not want me to take you to a hospital?

No, no. I have taken some percodan.
I can hardly feel any of this.

There is a lot of blood

you - you got your own
burden

mother being found
after all these years

hell-i hope we have enough
so you can ID her

all I need are the teeth

yeah we should have those

cleared out the freezer
and put her parts in there

everyone from the station
got to take some venison home

guess you folks do not
get a lot of crime up here huh?

No sir. Especially
murder.

Not til we found this body did
we think that he-

literally killed her

speaking of your father-

your aunt thinks you may
have been talking with him?

I have not seen my
father since I left the farm

seen is a tricky word.
No contact at all?

No. If you have been talking to him,
and you do not tell us about it

that could be considered
accessory after the fact

Abigail, this is Conrad

do not worry about it,
it is just a cut

It is terrible. You are making
a mountain out of a mole hill.

I told him to go

Jesus, oh god. It is ok, I am ok.
Do not help me, I do not want help

we got to get him patched up

do you mind staying
here to hold down the fort?

It is just the two of us and the deputy
has been on duty since yesterday

everybody and his dog
is sliding off the road

you want me to stay
here alone-

yes. I know it is
weird, but - ok, thanks!

Okay, come on you no, no, no, no.
No, no! I got work to do!

You really need to go

I win. Be strong, come on.
Okay

sorry about this Conrad

alright, thanks

mm hmm

do you know what
that word means?

It is what you do to a woman
when there is no pleasure in it

Conrad,
Conrad-

Conrad, um -hi

sorry about that. Hungry?

Sheriff was supposed to
put you up tonight, but

he is in no real position
to entertain... so

is there a motel?

In Chapman?

No

You are kind of stuck with me...

I am on duty for the next few
ours, so...

The deputy found a new bit of
evidence - murder weapon.

Right about sixty feet from the
bones

the handle was chewed up like
an animal dragged it all about.

Sawed off shotgun?

Yeah

I looked in the
freezer. It is not my mother.

Are you sure?

Yeah.
Her teeth were... A mess

it is not her.

Well-
I mean, who could it be then?

We do not just have people
unaccounted for

it is my father

who would have
wanted to kill your father?

Himself

this happens a lot
this time of year.

I cannot believe I only have
one blanket. Jeez! Brrr.

This day could not get
any weirder

what was she like, your mother?

She would never leave me alone with
my father for more than two seconds

do you think maybe
she is still alive?

No, I do not have any
hope of that

you want to hear something

okay

about four weeks after
she disappeared,

my father took me
on a walk out in the woods

over there

turn around

you wet yourself

get up or you will freeze to
stump.

Get on home.
You best hurry up.

When we got back he
started the fire on the stove,

he told me to stand by it, and he waited
the whole time it took for me to thaw out.

In the morning he was gone.
I never saw him again.

It must be so terrible for you
to be back here. I'm so sorry

no I feel better about it now.

Because you know he is dead?

It is knowing that he
intended to include himself.

Makes it less personal

it all started when my family
moved from Illinois to new Mexico

stop it. How many times have I told
you that is bad for your eyes?

Stop it is dad going to
pick me up after school?

No, you are going to walk home.

Mom! The doctor insisted we
move to a warmer climate

for the sake of my father

I remember not knowing
what to do, but knowing

that I wanted to be the
least of their worries.

And then I saw him.

All I could remember on
my first day of school

was the menacing look
he had on his face.

His name was Bobby bell.

One, two, three

hey, you want to play?

So, know how to play?

What is this game?
You have to hit it before it bounces twice

but you cannot hit it before it
bounces

and you cannot let it double
bounce or you are out

Okay! Sound simple enough? Yeah I guess.

So, where you from?

Uhm, Chicago

Chicago. What is your
favorite food?

Anything I guess really

tacos?

I guess

yeah the rest of the game though,
you have to stand right here

against the wall, but you cannot
move.

You cannot move. Stay still!

Stay!

Stay!

So just like this? I
thought, am I -

yep, yes, just back up against
the wall and stay here

okay

you're doing great

good one

do not move!

Stay

hey, the new Mexico outlaw is back.
How was your first day at school?

Make any new friends?

It is okay if he did not. I did
not make any my first year either

I was just asking. Did you
honey?

Yeah

are you going to lose
all your hair?

What?

In my book, it says, when you have this
disease, you could lose all your hair

oh you are a doctor now.
Let us have a look.

Don not read books like this.

As months went by, I remember
trying to do something -

anything. Whatever I could do to
help my father win his fight.

And suddenly, like a disease,
word spread around school.

You know they say the cubs could go all
the way this year. All the waaaay!

I have been thinking about this disease.
It is like a bunch of uninvited guests.

You did not ask them to come. They just
showed up one day and did not go home.

Dad die yet Charlie?

I can't believe you did that...

come on kids let us go.

Charlie

you want to explain yourself?

This fight that I am
having is mine. You understand?

Charlie

his fight was also mine

I am much older now, but a part of
me is still in that bed beside him.

The other part back
on that playground,

hoping that fight
put me back together again.

Pelicans can fly three thousand
miles without stopping

in the first world war-pelicans
transported supplies across enemy lines

Amanda peeled labels, chewed
nails, ate the caps off pens

twice she tried to kill herself

I used to think we would be best
friends forever and not just sisters

that was before dad died

before she went to rehab for the
third time

before I moved far away from
the mess I used to call home

hey you know uh, we were
invited over to Timmy later

I do know

what? I talk to him. He is my
ex-boyfriend

yeah after he was mine

I have no problem with leftovers

it does not even make any sense,
saying I drink like a fish

it is like saying I read like a
word

Amanda, who said you
drink like a fish?

Mom just said you
should not drive

Mom said you should not drive.

You know what, you are more like the fish.
I am ignoring that

come on. You are being a haddock.
Like a smoked haddock you know?

Ok I have been home
for like an hour-

can we just have a
normal conversation please?

Sorry

oh!

Does anybody want a muddy Mary?

With some leaves on top?

Crap.

Oh! You know what she
should do?

We should go inside
and get a cognac

that is the perfect dusk drink!

Do you think you should just
slow down a little bit?

Why? I am celebrating my sisters annual
abbreviated trip to the homeland

okay - well the sun does not go
down for another three hours

yeah, but if you get started
early, anything is possible

you of all people should know
that Lisa.

The combined
IQ of a colony of ants

exceeds the intellect of most
us senators

my mother

you wish to eat me!

One drink made her queen
Victoria

And three took her out of it
I was under the impression

that Amanda liked margaritas
- loved margaritas

counting his cock

what me and Amanda used to call
our stepfather self fondeling

what are we going to do
with all these margaritas?

I was under the impression
that Amanda liked marga-

what are you talking about?
We have heard you already.

Go find your sister!

Sweetie, go see where
she is okay? Huh? Thank you.

What the hell would you do
with the rest of these?

An ant is attracted to the
genitals of all mammals

both male and female.

Do not point at me -
my mother is not dead

what, what? I'm
ready with the glasses ok-

hey!

Oh my god - oh god -
come on

come here

oh shit

honey?

Seriously - you are acting and you
made me drag you all the way in here?

Stripped of its stinger -

a bee becomes nothing more
than a raisin with wings...

did you ever notice that there are no
streetlights in this town that work?

You still work at that delivery
place?

Yes - yes. That is what I am doing. No -
actually - I quit that three years ago

do you know anything about - me -
what I am doing - anything at all?

Okay - uhm - let us not

okay - I work at a dock
and I manage a band

have I heard of them?

Do you listen to
any decent bands?

I wanted to do some more artistic stuff
so I decided to become a monologuist

is that like a comic?

No, it is like
uhm, performance art, you know?

So I would tell stories
about my life

and I would incorporate facts about
animals and sort of do this -

awe inspiring

yeah - I kept trying to push
the show and push, push, push!

I was just hoping eventually somebody
would get what I was going for

do you know what I mean?

Yeah?
Yeah.

I mean - I have a kind of
idea of the man I want but -

the fucking clowns I
meet are never anywhere close

the stingerless bee
becomes an outcast

and must make its way in
a world alone

thinness is genetic. Like
baldness

unless you are me and then you are really
skinny but that is because you never eat

right? Look at that. Look at it. You
wanna put your little nose in there?

You wanna put your little nose in there?
There - put your little nose in it.

I like your hair.
Do not listen to my sister.

Do you have any
drinking beverages in here?

A pelican can fly three thousand
miles without stopping.

In the first world war - pelicans were used
to transport supplies against enemy lines.

The combined IQ of a
colony of ants exceeds

that of the intelligence
of most us senators

my sister and I went to see the
famous monkeys at the St. Louis zoo.

What famous monkeys?

The monkeys shared a tail.

You could not tell
where the first monkey ended

and the next monkey began

I forgot how many signs we had.

The hand signal that indicated
someone was lying.

The nostril flare that meant we
were dealing with a loser.

The hiccup that said, let us
get the hell out of here.

They would never let
anything separate them

not even the third monkey

who went into the kitchen to get
the first monkey a drink

and then one day

their father crashed into a tree

and monkey one and monkey two
dived into the magic bottle.

And monkey one
transformed into a bird.

And monkey two transformed into
a fish.

And when they spoke to each
other

neither of them could understand
what each other was saying anymore

what do you think?

You are prettier than I am

yeah, I am.

Hi, I am Monica.

I am Mr chub. May I
see your drivers license?

Why you get a lot of strange
women pretending to me maids?

Usually I do not mind being
carded, but not at work.

Please, come in.

Oh - I have my
own vacuum.

Nice condo. He could be an agent.
It always pays to wear lipstick.

So, uh, Monica -
did you bath this morning?

Seriously? Nine A.M. and he is
already picturing me naked.

Ooh I want you.
You will not be sorry.

No! You are my employer. We
should keep it that way.

Besides I don't think my boyfriend
would like it very much

what? You do not have
the right to ask me that.

I did not mean to offend. I just
have a thing about cleanliness.

So I noticed.

His hair is kind of nappy though - I mean
natty - natty is not a racist word, is it?

I dated a black guy once

come this way. Thank you.

Wow.

Ever think about knocking?

I did not mean to startle you.

Well, you did.

You work very
intently. Call if you need me.

I am fine, thank you.

Have you
forgotten the way to El Paso?

I am doing all right - really.

I know you heard they cut out that
lumpl had that you did not know about.

Which is why I am writing, because I
know some dumb somebody told you.

My own way of telling you would
have been more fun for both of us.

Anyway, it is out, and there is a little
cut like a smiley face under my nipple.

You will like it.

Come see the girl who loves you no matter
what. Hear me? Do not step on my heart.

Your only one - miss famous

course I
will change all the names.

You do not have to get
permission to do that, do you?

I love you!

Stop it. Oh, thank you.

Oh-don't go get a tattoo now.

You bring your lunch here often?

Please do not sit down.

I used to.

What is your name?

That is not really important.

I bet I can
guess your nickname. Foxy.

Why do these banker
types always hit on me?

Wrong its sting, actually.

Sting! Your nickname is sting?

I bet I know your nickname.

Poophead.
Asshole. Jerkoff.

What?

Nevermind.

So you must like the police, the
band. Cause of the lead singer.

Oh my god, that is gross.

I guess they are not
a band anymore.

Not for like thirty years. The last man
who called me sting stepped on my heart.

That is too bad. You know I have
seen you before.

I have actually
been looking for you.

You know I have been
looking for you for months.

Well, here I am. Thank god your book came
out. Your publisher gave me your number.

He should not have done that.

Sweet Monica. Will you
marry me?

It fits.

So you say he broke your heart?

Huh?

You said the guy who broke your
heart.

I did not say he broke
it. I said he stepped on it.

You have a resilient heart.
I like that. I like that a lot.

Excuse me.
Hello?

I gotta bounce. Okay, yeah, I
will see you around foxy.

Yeah, no, he called me.

Time for a break.

I just started.

The way you dust you deserve
one.

Here we go again.

Mrs. nighetti> only my Vincent makes
his mother happy with a grandchild.

Mrs. Nighetti [With nine boys,
and only one grandchild.

But my Vincent he names his daughter
Carlotta, which you may not know,

but my name is Carlotta. He names
her after his mother, my Vincent.

You have
told me that a million times.

Do you have any new pictures?

You would think that wife of his would
know I want new pictures every week

but she is too busy getting famous. I am
going to be a famous model, she says.

To listen to her talk, the baby
set her back years.

Oh, maybe you have not seen
this one...

I bet I have.

There is my girl.

Sweetie its time for dinner.

I wanna keep playing.

Just let her play.

So has that
Brian come to his senses yet?

Has he come rushing to you with
an armful of roses?

Have not heard a word.

But I am sure I will as soon
as his wife pops that kid out.

She is not that great

a little younger than I am

horrible laugh but she
sure knew how to trap him.

Probably
was not even on the pill.

Straighten out
- straighten out babe!

I will not go to him.
He has to come to me.

You are late again.

Sorry. She had a nap.

Good.

Thanks. After the book comes out.
Sally will need a private tutor.

I will be making appearances all
over the world.

Turkey or bologna?

Bologna!
I will start writing it soon.

I will describe his spotless
condo.

The way he walked.
The way his little voice rode the air.

The mysterious woman from El
Paso

and especially his shirts.

The way they faced the same
direction, one after another.

Like promises kept. Like the
days of a life.

Hey!

Can you read to me?

Um - sure I can
tell you a story

ummm

there once was a very beautiful
young woman named Cinderella

and she lived in a castle, I
think.

And she lived with her evil step mom
and two or three mean step sisters.

And she had to clean the house
every single day. Top to bottom.

And then one day there was an announcement
on TV that said there would be a big ball.

And she really wanted to go

because she knew that the man she was
supposed to be with was going to be there.

And she knew if she went there
she would...

Live happily ever after and
be a very famous writer.

Hi Paul, it is Laura.
I heard you were going to be in town

so I thought maybe if you had
time you could stop by

I would really like you to meet my
son Chris. We are at my moms house

'next message'

hi Paul. They just released your
father and we should be home soon

I do not want you to be surprised when
you see him, okay? He has gotten worse.

The stroke left him agitated. Maybe
you can take him for a drive tomorrow

he always liked that.

So good to see you.

I... let... let go.

Maybe you should get rid of that thing. Do
you not need a truck for your business?

Lazy, does not like
anything old.

Stop that. Call her caddy
please.

Paul would you help me
in the kitchen please.

Laura brought us home
from the hospital.

Did she?

She had the boy with her.

That boy looks exactly like you.

Boys not mine.

We know that.

That kid is the
spitting - mmm - mmm

spitting image.
Spitting image.

Not in the house.

There are blankets and sheets on
the couch.

And shower - I could smell
the wood lacquer on your skin.

Stop that. Just stop.

Just like me. Not long
for the world.

No just needs a little love that is all.
Just a little bit of love.

Watch this

see dad, told you, she is not
ready to leave me yet.

What does mom make of
all that smoking stuff?

I do not know.

I read somewhere a couple
weeks ago

that doctors are saying they're
actually good for you

especially if you had stroke
there suppose to really good

oh that is perfect. I
am going to remember that.

Good.
Yeah.

How is work?

I quit the.. I quit the
paper.

Why? You are a good
writer.

Yeah I make furniture
full time now

well - you always
liked wood.

Mom did not tell you that?

She does not tell me a goddamn thing.
But she - she - she told me that.

Oh, I knew you would
make that turn.

What do you mean? No, you said go anywhere.
I do not care we can go anywhere.

You cannot keep away from her.

What are you talking about?

Oh look, hey, no, no, I did not
even notice this was her street.

Oh well, you do not
notice most things.

Oh, I do not notice most things?
Is that not interesting...

you see, he looks just like, just
like you when you were young.

Yeah... well that kid
is not my kid.

Look at him!

What do I gotta look at
him for? Hey, hey, hey, listen -

that is not my son. That is not my son,
I do not know why you do not get that.

Why am I gonna look at him. That's not
my son. What a dumb thing to say.

Did he smoke?

Yeah, I did not see a
point in keeping him from it.

We drove past the, by Laura's house.
How is she doing these days?

She thinks of herself as family.
Coming to the hospital and everything.

You know, I do not know how you
put up with that every day.

He is so rude. He does not know he is being
rude. He drives around saying shit...

your father has always been a little mean.
It is all he has got left.

I cannot deny him the one
thing that he can still feel.

I do not remember any
meanness in him.

Glad you feel that way. I do not
have a particular hole in my memory.

Everyone has a little
meanness in them.

You should see the child.

I know. He is not your
son. But she was your wife.

She was my wife.

She led me to believe we would get
back together for four months

and just never bothered to
say, umm, oh I am pregnant.

Sometimes, honey, people
cannot speak their thoughts.

Other words come out instead.

Go see them.

You come to see me, or him?

You look like yourself.

I suppose that is a compliment.

So what are you up
to these days?

Umm, I am a teller at the bank, but mostly
I take care of cliff. And, uh, you?

I make furniture now.
Business is improving.

Eventually there might be some money in it.
But I am happier around the lumber.

I remember you always used to
say, wood cannot be forced.

You have to discover
the form within.

I do not think I said
that bullshit,

but if I did it was probably
just to impress you.

You did.

Hey buddy. How old
are you?

You are a big boy.

You like
horses? Huh?

You can have him, if you want
him.

Hey honey, you want to run inside
and show grandma your new toy?

Mommy is going to talk
to her friend.

That was kind of you.

You are still driving
the swinger?

My dad loves her. I let him smoke in it.
He, uh, is not himself anymore. You know.

Sometimes he looks
like my father.

Occasionally sounds like
my father, but he is...

I thought it would be
to strange to send you pictures.

I had a fling.
He looked like you.

I guess I should go.

You know where to find us.

Yeah.

My girl. My girl. That is what I
wanted to say. You look yourself,

I wanted to say you look like my
fucking girl, man.

Stupid ass idiot. Then what? Then what!?
Then what? I do not know.

What should I do?

We were locked out.

We would have to make
a decision soon.

Break in or hike a
few miles back to town.

But for now, we were
teenaged boys with one concern.

Lee> a couple summers ago I was
at church camp.

And you now how they have each day
you got a different activity.

Well, this particular day it was art and
crafts, and I mean I was not into it.

You know I hate crafts.
You hate arts and crafts.

Yeah. So this girl, I
kind of see her looking at me.

And she was beautiful. I mean, she had
like this perfectly feathered hair

and she had the most incredible
singing voice.

She could have had a record
deal, that is what I told her.

And so I was talking to her.

And we were supposed to be making those
gods eyes with the yarn or whatever.

And I was like 'hey you want to get
out of here?' And shes like 'okay'

so, I said come with me. And
we start making out. You know,

it is like I am telling you. It is those
innocent girls that get the craziest.

They are crazy, naughty.

It is like all
repressed inside or something.

And her ass. Oh my god.

Her ass was so round,
it was like the most

perfectly round thing
that you have ever seen.

Like a bubble?

I did not even know nature could create
something - it was like a babies head.

God dammit, Michael. oh yeah, real soft.
Like a babies cheeks.

Lee> yeah, yeah, just like two
little babies heads.

It goes without saying
that this was bullshit.

Lee was starving for information
about sex just like the rest of us.

A few years back, lees
father was caught performing

an abortion and stripped
of his license to operate.

Lee did not touch or comfort his
father.

He did not ask about the law or
justice or even who the woman was.

He only asked one thing

was she naked?

She was such - such good
pussy, man. What about you Greg?

Well, it was not quite as
innocent as Bible camp...

get ready for the bullshit.

Hey! So, I am out mowing
my lawn.

Its my neighbors yard and she was
probably like maybe forty something,

I am not sure, but she was not
too old, but like just right!

And she comes out like half way
through, alright -

and she invites me in for cookies
and lemonade. your neighbor??

- It is like..
- Twinkies and lemonade?

She must have known me, I do
not know how, but she got me.

And next thing I know she comes back around
Twinkies, lemonade, no shirt, no bra.

Just tits man, they were like -
if I had to compare them -

I would probably say like working with -
maybe a mango - you know what I am saying.

Like a mango

almost like, you know how
like when your checking

the mango to make sure
it is not rotten.

But it is squishy and stuff.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It is like a rotten mango.
So anyway you know - I start

of course the Twinkies and
lemonade are long gone. Fuck that.

And so I am fucking her and she
starts making this noise.

And dammit if I had a tape recorder
for that noise. It was beautiful.

What was it? it was - it was
a damn serenade of beauty.

I want to hear the noise. I wish
I could create it. It was..

Yeah you can, go
ahead. Come on. Make the noise.

No I cannot. I cannot.
I cannot.

Was it a little like -

yeah, like fucking a
retarded pig kind of.

No, no, no, no. It was like, you know what.
Alright, for you all sakes.

Okay. I will make the
noise, alright. One time show.

Thank you, alright!

Please take it in, I
might not do it justice.

But I will give it
a shot okay, so -

right here. It is
like that.

It is just like, it is real
long and deep like 'uuuuuhhhhh'

I thought this was the
sound that she made. Not you.

No that is the sound she
made yeah.

That is the sound she made!?

In fact, Greg was borrowing
details from something

he witnessed through
a keyhole one night.

Gregs parents had invited
some of their friends over.

They did this from time to
time apparently.

Oh yeah

who is first?

Oh - I am first

bitchin man.
Yeah man that is righteous.

Thank you. Thank you.

Yeah. No big deal. What about you, man.
What about your lady Michael?

I want to hear some dirty shit.

Okay, there is this one time.

Yeah, lets hear it.
Yeah, ready for it.

Remember the Chandler game?

Yeah, yeah.

Well the party. The
party after the game.

You were not there but I went
with my older brother.

And umm, it was all older chicks
there. And you know.

Anyway, I was at this party and I look
across the room and I see this girl.

You know I was sitting
all the way across the

room but somehow we
just keep locking eyes.

And she is giving me this real intense
stare. She was so beautiful man.

I mean like, movie star eyes and she
is wearing this really cute outfit.

I glance down and I see shes got
these white panties on

so, uhh, what about the
white panties?

So she found a way
to show them to me. Just me.

Damn! like - did you do
anything about it? Come on.

Where are you going? That
is cool about the white panties.

The story I told my friends
was only part of the truth.

The white flash of the girl
underwear did something to me.

I had to move, say something.

So what did you do?

Well, I stand up and I just
go straight across the room.

I could tell she wanted me to do
something. So - I reached out.

Oh really? What did you
reach out for?

Well - I put my
finger there.

Where? Where did you put
it?

Put it there. Right - right fucking there.
Right there.

What happened from there?
Just leave her sitting. Come on.

Alright, okay. Let me
get to that.

I am jealous - I would
love to hear it.

Because I was a virgin I could no
describe what I did with the girl.

What I described was a
landscape.

Mountains.

Fields.

The things around me.

I substituted the body of a
woman for the body of the earth.

At least that is what I think I
did.

We did not know exactly
what we were saying.

But we knew we were saying
more than what was said.

She wants it so. So I gave it to her.
You know. I gave it to her real hard.

You know, real fast. Deep, you
know.

I do not think I could have
gotten deeper or gone harder.

Ahh, that is the best!

Yeah. And umm,

when it was all over - I just
looked at her and then I left.

That was a good story, man. Yeah,
that was great. Look at us.

Umm, you guys want another
cigarette?

Yeah.
It is about time for me.

We talked into the night.

Eventually we did hike the five miles
back into town to call a locksmith.

But for now we were
content to sit and smoke.

Three boys of no particular
distinction.

Elevating as best we could, the fragile
faith that our lives had meaning.

As much as anything ever really
happens, this really did.

I guess you could say I was
in that drifting phase...

You can call it whatever
you want.

Somewhere between dropping out of college
and the beginning of settling down.

I was headed home for the
summer to straighten myself out.

But took a detour.

A couple thousand miles west of
my intended destination.

I ended up at this house
in apex, Colorado.

My buddy Clete was there.

Said he knew this girl that
was dog sitting for some

rich folks spending the summer
in Scotland or something.

He said there was a full liquor cabinet,
stockpile of shrooms and a free bed.

So it seemed worth a pit stop

god a lot of people lived in
that house over the summer.

It was actually hard to tell who did
and who did not on any particular day.

I know, I cannot remember a lot
of their names.

Does it matter?
Well there was Barnett.

Cause she
fucking squats when she pees.

You know Barnett was a special kind
of asshole, you know the type.

Hey, my man! see it was bad to say,
considering. But that is the truth.

I do not know if I like
white women anymore.

I do not even know
which one to pick.

You know what I am saying. I was thinking
about when I was throwing rocks at a river.

Anyway I would like to talk to you about
it more if you got some time. Good shit.

Lions go after the weak link.
Always the baby wildebeest,

the retarded zebra, the
gimpy little antelope.

Now, based on this evidence, what
do you think this movie is called?

The noble beast"

still talking about that
fucking movie?

It is a documentary.
And it is significant.

Clete was full of useful information
from public television.

For you. Take them and
trip in good health.

Like the cultural importance of baseball,
or the healing powers of magic mushrooms

or the most effective methods of
hunting in the desert.

See, those were the topics of
conversation that summer.

And everyone was engaged in a horse
race for the dog sitter - Lila.

You looking for something?

Yeah, just some water.

You are in the wrong
place, buddy.

Whiskey and ice. It is my specialty.
Plus, it is all we got left, so.

Stu, nice guy, had a flare
or the near overdose.

What is up with him?

Been like that or hours. We do not
know if it is drugs or something

or something? What do you
mean or something?

I do not know. A million
things.

You bastards.

I think we are all bastards and saints.
Just depends on the day.

You are quite profound
for someone from Ohio.

The way I saw it I
had two options.

Turn tail and head for home.
Or throw my hat in the ring.

I mean, what would you do?

You cannot just sit next to a girl and
expect her to unfold her life to you

like it is a shirt she is asking
you to wear.

You have to show her that you are giving
something up in order to talk to her.

I am telling you, man.

If you want to get to the really good
stories, you have to make an effort.

High school, the lady friend.

Uhh, what do you want to know?
I want to know it all.

She was not especially beautiful,
but she was amazing to talk to

so you never saw her again?

I kind of lost track of her. But I did see
her, yeah, at our ten year reunion. Yeah.

You went to your ten year reunion...
yeah I did. Why?

No reason. I do not know. okay.

Anyways she, she is married to some
guy who works for NASA. Yeah. fuck.

They already had a kid. And
another one on the way. wow.

Yeah. The whole time I kept thinking about
how crazy she used to be for me, you know?

How it could have been my
kid, calling me daddy.

Like somehow I had given up my
chance to walk on the moon.

It is not to late you
know. To walk on the moon.

Nah! I hate flying.
Always have.

Is that right?
Uh huh.

Pussies!
Pussies! Pussies!

You are the
biggest pussy of them all.

It is true.

Eww! Fuck you! Fuck you!

Fuck! Oww!

We can get five cents for these.
Wanna help me collect them?

What happened to him?

Him or the other one?

Okay. This fucking guy.

You coming?

We cannot just leave
him out here.

Well, wake him up.

Jesus Christ.

You could damage your bladder
holding your pee that long.

Fuck it, now what?

You are on the right track, maybe
just thinking a little too small.

Fuck head, come here.
Grab his arms I got an idea.

Oh shit. Yes sir,
yes sir.

Alright walk this way.

One, two, three!

Shit! Barnett wake up
you bastard! Wake up Barnett!

He is fucking around.

Barnett!

Oh fuck!

It is some consolation
that he was an asshole.

But - what are you going
to tell Lila?

Nothing. We are not
telling Lila anything.

I cannot believe this.
Who dies??

Can you not say it like that.

Like what?

Of all the days to run
out of fucking alcohol!

Did you check his pulse?

Yeah.

Do not tell Stu. Do not
fucking tell anyone.

Promise me.

Promise me!

I promise.

I do not think Lila had any second
thoughts about being my girlfriend.

I did not. But you know how it is, you
fall in love, you cannot see beyond it.

I guess that is where time,
it just, gets away from you.

Is that shit or vomit?

This is damnation territory.

I may have had something
to do with that.

Should someone say a few words?

Okay. Rest in peace.
Umm, yeah. Amen.

Okay. Rest in peace.
Umm, yeah. Amen.

I think you should run
some water.

There is an idea.

That is my shirt you know.

Wanna get married?

My parents float me
some money every couple months.

That could pay for
our marriage certificate.

Do you have any savings?

Do not worry I will buy
you a big old ring.

I guess I could go back
to waitressing.

Yeah, that would be good.

Good morning, sir.

Morning - I hate to bother you.
But your wife came by.

Said you murdered a man?

I mean it was perfect.

Down to my damn underwear.
Glass of whiskey in my hand.

I just looked at him and said -
I would not call it murder.

I realize now that was a slip.

It is never easy to know what to
say in the moment, is it?

You know, there is one last
thing that I remember.

So all the dogs in town, they were barking
at us when we arrived that first night.

Not knowing what we were getting
into.

That I would murder a man.
Manslaughter a dog. And fall in love.

Despite what you might think.

Those fucking dogs. They would not stop
barking. What do you think that means??

Those fucking dogs. They would not stop
barking. What do you think that means??

Some character will complain that his
nowhere life is everyone else fault.

All you have to do is sit on
the wrong stool.

To get the good stories
you have to make an effort.

You have to live them.