Original subtitles

Twice a year, the biker gang from Yagyu High School...

attacks our school to steal the student government money.

If we report it to the police, the gang will only attack harder.

President, we should fight them.

Of course! I know that.

This was a documentary prepared by our Film Workshop club...

compiled from the attack six months ago.

It's entitled 'Terror of the Yagyu Army'.

President, would you explain your ideas about the matter.

I don't want to see any more without a constructive plan.

You accepted the office of President knowing the gang will soon be coming.

In the past five months, what have you done to protect the school?

Are you serious about representing Kibougaoka School?

How can you be so accusatory without taking some responsibility yourselves?

Aren't you ashamed of yourselves?

It's counter-productive to continue this discussion. You have no ideas!

- This is outrageous! - What's going to happen to us?

Hey, Yohei!

Satomi, why are you here?

I came to deliver an umbrella to my big brother. It's really bad outside.

Is he inside?

What's wrong with you?

You don't want to see this. You'll be disappointed...

Know what I mean?

Do you want to fight the Yagyu, or not?

We are scholars. We're not fighters.

He's right; we're not in shape for something like that.

- Yes. - That's the truth.

So you're not willing to organize against them and fight?

Vice-President, we only have two more weeks before they attack.

We should make a plan and use our intelligence, right?

Our old president still needs crutches to get around.

You don't want that to happen to yourself, right?

- Crutches! - Can you imagine?

President, if we allow that to happen, we'll lose our student budget again.

- No way! - What can we do? - President! Look at this.

We won't be able to compete in the National League...

- if we keep practicing with balls like that. - The National League?

This school's never even won the District League!

- What? - Stop arguing!

President, you have to go over there and negotiate a discount.

If you approach them on your knees, they may make a deal.

Perhaps we could offer them $3000. Maybe they do have feelings.

- No way! - What a joke.

He's right: you must be a scapegoat to save us.

- That's right. - We need a sacrifice.

I'm not going to give them blood money...

and I agree we can't just ignore the situation anymore.

Are you saying that you're going to fight them?

- Can you believe this? - Single-handedly?

It might be painful, but you'd be better off bending backwards.

President, do it for us.

How about hiring some yojimbo (bodyguards)?

- You're not a member of the council. - So what?

- Satomi? - Do you understand...? Yojimbo.

Satomi, don't!

Don't you kids know anything? The Seven Samurai?

It's a classic movie... everybody's seen it.

Yojimbo?

V-MADONNA: THE GREAT WAR (AKA GO FOR BROKE)

Hey, Satomi, how far do we have to go?

We're almost there.

I never imagined a computer geek like you...

would have such macho male friends.

- You'll see. - What...?

Come on, keep going.

Perhaps it'll be some guy who's practicing the Shaolin Arts.

I can just imagine.

Keigo, can't you be more careful?

If you'll stop kicking my back.

The truth is, I don't really like that kind of machismo.

I always thought it was kind of perverted.

You talk too much. Shut up, huh?

There!

Directed by Genji Nakamura

Let me introduce you to my brother and his friend, Higa.

Saeka Agawa.

Why are you just standing there? Say hello to her.

- Yes... Please... we need your help. - Please.

If we do nothing, they'll beat us up till we graduate.

But... can a woman really give us the help we need?

Don't you think she has a threatening persona...

some kind of force hidden inside her?

- Besides... she's cute. - You're stupid.

You fixed it... You really fixed it!

Say... what did you decide?

This time... if we fight and lose... I won't have another chance.

You should be prepared to break two or three ribs.

Easy come, easy go.

My brother's underestimating you:

he doesn't think a woman can be a yojimbo.

I don't blame him.

- May I ask you something? - Go ahead.

What kind of tactics can we use to fight against them?

Let's see... if we get involved in a straightforward fight,

we couldn't possibly win.

We need to form a small, strong-but-selective guerrilla army.

- A guerrilla army? - Guerrilla strategy, eh?

"Lead forward": the best defense is a strong offense.

Lead forward...

- Do you really understand? - I do.

I can introduce you to a guerrilla. She's a stuntwoman.

What the hell are you doing in here?

I'm the Student President of Kibougaoka High School.

- Are you all right? - I think so.

We're okay.

Who's the kid? Who is he?

- This is a friend. - What's he doing here?

I'm very sorry for the inconvenience.

All right.

Koga, we're ready to shoot scene 53. Prepare yourself.

Yes. Sorry.

Saeka, where've you been?

I went to get some gas.

- Do you know what happened? - No, what?

I had to protect the President.

Chuck, are you saying you'll join us?

Thank you very much!

The only daughter of an Arabian?!

- Sometimes she's crazy, but she's a good girl. - Are you sure?

- Hello. - Where's Highness?

Highness?

What are you doing stuck up there?

- Is it true that someone is going to give me a chance to be wild? - Yes.

Is this the prototype?

It's almost completed.

- Are you the sponsor? - Yes.

- Glad to meet you. - You, too.

Everything's ready.

- I'm going ahead. - Okay.

- Battle Royale Death Match? - Yes.

Sometimes I'd like to play a good guy's part...

I'd love to hear the cheer from the audience.

There won't be an audience this time, but there are no referees or rules, either.

- Sounds like fun. - You won't be sorry.

All right.

I don't know if we'll win or lose...

but that's what makes it so much fun.

If we could find 30 girls like her, we'd win for sure.

Won't you come along with us?

No, we're busy right now.

Somebody wants to talk to you.

- Do you want to treat us to lunch? - Don't fuck with us!

Unless you want a scar on your pretty face!

It won't take long, then you can leave.

I see.

Come on, boy.

- How far do we have to go? - We're almost there.

Move it, boy!

Don't walk so slow!

Come on.

- Razor Maki... - Do you know her?

She was expelled from my school last year.

Hey, Keigo - you've become very cute since I saw you last.

You look good too, Maki.

I heard you decided to fight against the Yagyu Gang.

Goody-goody boys and girls making a big decision, eh?

I don't know where you got the information, but I admire your network.

I see... you're the one in the shadows.

You must be more cunning than your pretty face shows.

So... what did you want?

Previously, the only person to challenge the Yagyu was me.

So what?

Even though I was expelled...

I still have feelings for my old high school.

Why don't you offer me a yojimbo position, too?

I'm sorry, but you wouldn't fit in.

And I'm the one in charge of picking the army.

Okay... Keigo, aren't you looking for the strongest yojimbo?

The strongest, yes.

So if I were stronger than her, you'd rather hire me?

Well... I must also consider personality and...

Shut the fuck up!

Personality isn't going to win your war, stupid!

I'm sorry.

It looks like there's no way to avoid a confrontation.

Don't help me, girls. This is personal.

Your pretty skin will be shredded.

I said, don't help me!

I lost.

Razor Maki, I'm very impressed by your fighting skills.

- Tomorrow, 2 o'clock. Punctuality is important. - Saeka!

Maki!

The battle is 10 days away... we need to prepare for it.

First, we'll form the SP Troop,

which will be made up of Sports Club members, and we'll train them for the fight.

What does 'SP' mean?

"Secret Police".

Right: Secret Police, or "Himitsu Keisatsu".

On school records, this will be called the 'SP Music Club'.

This group of girls here are the commanders and trainers.

We'll turn the Kibougaoka school boys into good fighters.

I want you guys to be clearer about the basic issues.

I don't know what kind of experts you are, but...

women are made to be married. They can't possibly be fighters.

What kind of lame crap is that?!

Are you aware that the opponents are the forceful Yagyu Gang?

"Made to be married"? How can you disrespect your gender?

Our destinies are in your hands. Everybody agrees?

- Shiraishi, are you with us? - Yes.

- And you guys? - No objections.

Okay!

- The last thing to discuss is business. - Business?

- The fee for your Yojimbo Army is 200 yen per person. - 200 yen?!

Yes: money is necessary to motivate and excite us.

You agree... right?

We accept... Boss.

All right. So...

Let me propose a toast... to victory. Cheers, everyone.

Wait a minute. I want to contribute something...

- Today's bill is on me. - All right!

Saeka.

I'll show you the way.

- Satomi. - Hello.

How come you're wearing Kibougaoka HK's uniform?

To look good.

I don't get it.

We need someone who can conduct computer strategy analysis.

How'd you bring your home computer to school?

- They helped me. - We're sorry.

Do we have to pay my sister a fee, too?

I can forget about our brother/sister relationship.

Strategy analysis? Where'll you get that information?

We've noticed a problem...

Let me explain. I can gather information about the Yagyu.

- Is that so? - I'll help. - Me, too.

Shiraichi, this is dangerous... we shouldn't be doing it.

It's impossible to get any information about them.

- Sometimes, it's better to quit. Can't you see that? - Shut up!

What? She looks familiar.

Eh? She's in Class 303, isn't she?

Komachi Wakahara, transferred from Nagoya. She's a prostitute!

Disgusting!

- Miss Wakahara. - What?

This is an interesting part-time job.

Aren't you ashamed of yourself?

People already know about it?

If you think you're part of Kibougaoka, you must help us.

I'll do anything to help my school.

What do you need me to do?

We need information about the Yagyu Gang.

Information?

Wakahara, please help us.

Today, we, the Kibougaoka Student Government,

declare war against the Yagyu Gang.

Does everyone agree with this proposition? Respond!

All right, we'll prepare a simulation program, 'Yagyu Vs Madonna'.

Here we have a 'Cement Bomb' constructed by Highness.

My bazooka will be completed on time. Trust me.

Then Chuck and her fighters...

My fighters will be ready D-Day, after concentrated training.

We deserve all the accolades.

In one week, I'll develop twice the muscle strength... I can't wait!

But who's going to ring the bell to start the match?

Followed by Komachi's rifle attack.

That's right: perfect score on the range.

Four Giants survive. And on the second floor...

Maki will make her stand against Koroiwa.

My fists are calling them.

But why don't I simply attack and kill all of them?

On the third floor is a barricade, but there's a hidden weapon here.

A bomb is secured inside the barricade.

The last survivor, Kazama, will be killed by a pitching machine.

That's it, Game Over. Victory for us.

You can't really program something like this.

Brother, I stayed up two nights creating this program,

based on the information discovered by Komachi.

You have gravely insulted the War Strategist!

It just seems too simplistic...

- Komachi, is your information accurate? - Of course.

The Yagyu Gang is junk, except for its four great leaders.

You don't have to worry about the accuracy.

I found a way to make Koroiwa leak the information. He's easy.

Most importantly, we want them to feel the disgrace of being beaten by women.

When the Madonna army bonds together, victory will be ours.

- "Madonna"? - Right. The Seven Madonnas.

Fight the good fight!

Why did you decide to fight for us?

Well, I guess... for nostalgic reasons.

Nostalgic?

When I was a little kid, there was a bully in our neighborhood.

I used to get into terrible fights with him.

You really fought him?

I couldn't help myself...

when I'd see him picking on the little kids

My personality hasn't changed since then.

When I was a kid, I was always picked on by bullies, and I'd run home crying.

You've not changed, either.

That's true.

But you can't run home anymore.

It's much better to fight and lose...

than it is to lose without fighting.

That's right... Go for broke.

I won't give in to those sons-of-bitches.

Then... the arrival of D-DAY...

- Hey, I have to take a piss. - Stupid.

They're here!

Highness, stand by for the signal to begin your attack.

Roger.

That's weird... they aren't entering.

Not yet... stand by.

- Something's fucked up here. - Nah, they're just chickenshit.

Don't! Turn around! Pull back! Pull back!

Komachi... go!

What the...?! I've been shot!!

Pull back! Pull back!

Thank you! We did it!

- Saeka, I'm going to see the troops. - Let's go.

- Did you get the message? - Yes.

Having fun? We beat them! Drink until dawn!

Dawn! Dawn...!

I wish I could have seen the fight with my own eyes,

instead of just on the TV screens.

Wait, sister! Take it easy...

You know, in wrestling, if you have an easy victory...

- the next day, the winner gets his ass kicked. - No, no.

You're full of shit!

Today they discovered you're different from the old Kibougaoka,

but don't think they're going to stop attacking you.

- Our school has changed today, from wimps to champions. - Yes!

- Let's toast! - Cheers!

I was wondering where you were.

I'm really touched...

Now I know what it feels like to protect our castle with our own hands.

Do you think the Yagyu Gang can be silenced so easily?

I admit... it's strange to have such an easy victory.

But it's also good to win without casualties.

We taught them a lesson.

They didn't learn anything. The lesson wasn't clear.

You think... they'll be back for revenge?

I know how terribly cruel she is.

It was almost a year ago...

I don't know what you're thinking about, but...

you'll never be safe if you go against me.

You are very idealistic.

I won't let someone "wet behind the ears" do this to me.

Why do you hate me? Why did you leave me?

Why... Why?

You bastard! Are you trying to rape me without paying for it?!

You've got guts, whore!

You're the one who leaked information about us to them.

Stop it! Stop!

Shut the fuck up!

Cut! Cut!

Are you all right? What happened?

- Somebody get the first aid box. - I'll get it. - I'm all right.

You're okay. Let's go.

Scene 26. Places, everybody.

- Highness! - What happened?

- Highness...? - Settle down.

Highness?

Highness, be calm.

This is horrible.

I knew they wouldn't forget so easily. Leopard's doing this.

- Leopard? - She's the woman pulling the strings behind the Yagyu.

Woman?

Who is she? Do you know her?

She was the head of the biggest delinquent biker gang in the South Kanto region.

She was known as 'Leopard'.

But Highness was lucky... she's still alive.

What about Maki?

What happened, Yumi?

Naoko!

What's wrong with you guys?

They did it... Maki, you've got to escape.

Tell me... who did this to you?

- Maki, are you all right? - Saeka!

Get out of there right now! Everybody's getting beaten up.

Where can I go? I don't have anyplace.

Hang up and leave immediately.

Maki, what's wrong? Maki!

Don't do it! Stop!

What?! Who the hell are you?

Don't try to fuck with me!

Damn you!

Let go! Let go of me!

It's been a long time.

You've grown into a woman.

Shall we make up?

¥30,000 - that's the price for Maki.

After that, keep your nose out of our business.

What happened? What did she say?

What...? How is Maki? What's going to happen to her?

Over?

- Is the meeting over? - It wasn't a meeting.

Four injured, one missing.

The Yagyu gang is far beyond our level.

The outcome is obvious: we can't fight them, or we'll all be killed.

That's the final twist here! So much for your victory!

Hey... Hey!

We'd be better off giving up.

I can't believe you're saying this!

- Damn! - We have no other choice.

It's over.

So we'll accept any conditions offered by the Yagyu?

Exchanging Maki for ¥30,000... we have no other choice.

Our school needs that money.

How come we have to sacrifice it for that Madonna?

I understand what you're saying, but...

with Leopard involved, this war-game isn't a game anymore.

But... what if Saeka's still willing to fight?

Don't be stupid! You think like a kid.

Who knows the cruelty of Leopard best?

Saeka, of course.

But, listen...

She's not the kind of person who would run from a fight.

I am the leader!

I have the authority to make the decision.

We lost the war.

- What's this? - ¥30,000

- Please deal with it. - What does that mean?

It means we won the battle, but lost the war.

Wait a minute.

I want to end the whole thing with money.

Have you gone nuts?

If we buckle under right now... they'll never leave us alone.

They're too strong for us.

If we continue the fight...

Do you want me to leave you guys alone?

The Madonna army's finished. The SP club is dissolved.

Our opponent is now Leopard.

If we fight under these circumstances...

you know we don't have a choice.

Even though the chances are slim... I'd still fight for it.

Be realistic.

Someday, you'll laugh about this kind of thing,

saying, "We were too young for such an outrageous adventure."

We need to stop right now, in order to laugh later.

You're saying the opposite of what you said before.

Please help Maki with this money.

So this is the end... of the line?

Why are you taking so long? Move quickly.

Next week, we'll start budgeting the leftover funds.

SP club is now inactive.

How long will you keep wearing that uniform?

You don't have to yell like that.

You're just cranky 'cause things didn't work out.

- Hey! - What's up?

- Somebody 's accessed the printer from an outside terminal. - What? - Look at this.

"The hostage must be exchanged for ¥30,000.

"However, you still owe me for your war crimes.

"Two hours from now, hell will break out in Kibougaoka School - Leopard"

- Those dirty shits! - Dirty bastards!

This is really serious.

Brother, what will we do? Should we run away?

Even if we do, we'll get beaten up sooner or later.

What should we do? President?

Brother...

Even if we lose... it's better to go down fighting.

You have the money?

Maki! Maki!

Where's Leopard? I need to talk to her.

I'll listen on her behalf.

I want to make sure you won't attack Kibougaoka anymore.

That's too bad - she's heading over there right now.

To Kibougaoka?!

You broke the promise!

Kids, using that stupid trick... they must be punished for it.

We must teach them a lesson.

Goodbye.

Don't move!

Saeka!

Maki, are you okay?

Saeka... I can't forgive them.

If we back off like this...

we'll lose our pride as women.

I understand, Maki.

I'll do it, even if it costs me my life.

Satomi... you must go home.

It's too late - we've already made our pledge of honor.

I'll do my best.

It's very strange, because this isn't even your school.

That's right, Satomi...

It's not too late to go back to the real world.

I have responsibilities...

It was my idea to hire yojimbos in the first place.

I understand.

They're coming!

How come this is breaking down? I hate it! Please, reboot.

Hey, Yohei - we're ready. Are you shaking?

I'm too excited to shake.

Yes... I'm ready.

We're here! We're ready!

Very brave boy.

Saeka!

- I'm here. - Thank you.

Well, what shall we do now?

What kind of leader are you?! No plan?

We're a bit frantic right now.

Let's do whatever it takes.

Why are we waiting? Let's attack.

Break it down.

The only way is with a blow torch.

Open up, or we'll kill everyone!

What are they doing?

Maybe they'll break through the shutter.

- It looks like they've got an acetylene torch. - Torch?

We need to know if it can cut through a shutter, and how long it'd take.

I need the data so bad...!

- Library! Can you take me to the library? - Yes.

- They're here! - Here!

Brother! Saeka! Help us!

Whatever we do... it's got to be in the next 20 minutes or so.

That's it. We're all going to be raped!

You mean, I'm going to get it in the ass?

This is too much! What kind of animals are they?

God, please...

I'm going to treat you really well...

until you taste my furious wrath.

That's it! I won't believe a computer again!

- Satomi, take it easy. - Satomi, don't...!

It's going to be a stand-off at Kibougaoka.

If we can take care of Leopard, we'll find a way out.

Is there a way?

Only if it's more important...

- than our lives. - Our lives?

All right. I won't give up.

Keigo, we aren't safe here anymore.

Stop being a sissy!

We'll do it! We'll get out of this mess!

- Don't be afraid. - Right.

- Yohei, I'm entrusting you with the others. - Yes.

- Brother, good luck. - Thanks.

Why are you so stubborn?

Patience is the key to her heart...

That girl.

What?! Give the order for an attack!

The best-tasting quarry is the one that takes longest to catch.

What should we do?

That was a nice try, boy.

So we meet again.

This is the end for you, Saeka.

Maybe not.

Shit! Looks like it'll be a great finale.

- You're late. - Are you okay?

- Thank you. - Saeka, we're all here.

Thank you.

Everybody... are you ready?

Attack! Kill them all!

Maki!

I got him!

- We did it! - We did it...!

Thank you.

You're the greatest!

That's the student council president for you! No wonder our school is laughed at.

Question 2...

- I'm sorry. - Oh, you've finally come.

- Late for your first day? - I'm sorry.

Let me introduce the new transfer student, Sayaka Agawa.

Her father worked in the US, and she lived there for a long time.

I'm Sayaka Agawa. Nice to meet you.

- Your desk is over there. Go and take your seat. - All right.

Now, turn to page 87...

Starring: Yukari Asami as Saeka Kozue Saito as Satomi Yuki Ninagawa as Leopard

Rikako Murukami Shigeyuki Nakamura Yuko Watanabe Jiro Karasawa

Screenplay: Hisashi Nozawa

Translation: Yuko Mihara & Thomas Weisser Subtitles transcribed & timed by lordretsudo

Directed by Genji Nakamura