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A professor told me that I look South Korean by appearance, but I was North Korean by heart.

I replied, "Yeah, you are right.

I am a North Korean inside out,

and I don't want to deny it."

I want my friends and family back in North Korea to live a better life.

I long for a world where people in North Korea and South Korea live peacefully.

It's not like I'm putting myself in danger on purpose.

I've just been doing what I have to do.

This is just what I'm destined for.

Whenever I come to China, the nervousness and fear that I had 10 years ago comes right back.

Of course it's less than it was 10 years ago, but that memory is still vivid.

I feel like every time I come back to China it will be like this.

I work in hiding, but also publicly.

That's what makes art so fun.

Even if you work in the dark, it doesn't stay in the dark.

It becomes public.

It's fun.

I like it.

I had my first exhibition upon graduating college.

It caught the media's attention.

Then during my first solo exhibition, the media came again and wrote about my artwork.

I created a piece,

there's a bedridden Kim Jong Il, and a kid is handing him a coke bottle.

It's called 'Take Some Medicine.’

That was published in Time magazine.

So far I've had exhibits in

Berlin.

Interviewer: Why don't you show your face?

Well, if I showed my face in public

it is clear that my parents and siblings living in North Korea

will be in danger.

This damn world hasn't allowed me to present myself publicly,

That's the only reason I can't reveal who I am.

"There is nothing to envy in the world."

When I first met him, I didn't like him that much.

He came wearing socks that had holes in them

and it was winter, so he wore two sets of long johns,

and two sweaters,

and a jacket that had lost all its insulating cotton.

We started dating

and I was so curious.

It was my first time meeting a defector.

I didn't even know there was such a thing as a North Korean defector.

I also had experienced a lot of heartbreak within my family.

But I realized he had experienced a different kind of heartbreak.

My kids are so blessed to have Sun Mu as a dad.

He's very thoughtful, and is like a friend to them.

One time, they asked where their grandma was.

So I wanted to express that situation.

Grandma is in that neighborhood up north, but we can't go because of the barbed wire.

This is my first daughter.

Whenever talk of her grandma comes up, she wants to send a letter in the mail,

but it can't be delivered.

So I expressed the reality of north and south through this.

In North Korea there's no such thing as contemporary art.

His experiences in North Korea are part of his style

but what he has felt here in the south has also been mixed into his style.

If Korean reunification were to suddenly happen, I think it would resemble Sun Mu's paintings.

My name is Cui Xianji.

This is a retrospective of my artwork.

A retrospective of an artist in his 50s,

and I get to show and look back on all the artwork I have made thus far.

Because I'm second generation Korean-Chinese

I know Korea better than other Chinese people,

and I know China better than any other Koreans.

It was 2008 when I originally met Sun Mu.

I was at the Busan Biennale in 2008

and there was an incident.

The night before the opening ceremony, Sun Mu's painting was withdrawn.

The flag is upside down.

The flag suggests the country is backwards.

My hands were trembling when I was painting this piece.

I always had a fear that someone might sneak up behind me and stab me.

It took a lot of courage.

There can be a fight between the artist and the audience.

And in this fight based on misunderstanding, I was in the middle.

Only I could understand both sides.

People make it all politicized whenever there is any image of North Korea.

But that's my life story.

My name is Liang Kegang. I am the director of Beijing Yuan Art Museum.

I have worked at the Yuan Gallery for three years, and the gallery has been here for six years.

Last year, artist Cui Xianji introduced me to Sun Mu.

When I heard that he is an artist who defected from North Korea, I became very interested.

In Beijing, there are many North Korean artists who draw their government's propaganda.

Those paintings look very funny

They are like the Chinese propaganda of 40 years ago during the Cultural Revolution.

I had never met an artist who escaped North Korea and now does real contemporary art.

Ever since they started the “Six Party Talks,” it's never gone right.

But I was thinking, what if it were little children?

If it were little children, wouldn't they just hold hands and play around together?

He didn't paint the suffering and present only the wounds,

but he painted hope, a beautiful thing. This is very precious.

At the end of 2013, I went to Seoul with Cui Xianji,

and in Seoul, I paid a visit to Sun Mu's studio.

When I entered his studio, it was very good work. I liked it very much.

So I decided to do a solo exhibition for him.

North Korea is bound to know about this exhibit, since there's a North Korean embassy there.

To be honest, this exhibition worries me a lot.

I felt I had to give him my approval, but we will have to be very cautious.

When I first saw the gallery it seemed really big, and I had a lot of stories in my mind.

I thought I want to have an exhibition in a place like this,

I could really go all out in a place like this, especially in Beijing.

An exhibition in China really means a lot to me.

Not only for me, but it will be the same for every defector.

When they heard about the exhibition, other North Korean defectors asked,

"Won't it be dangerous?"

It's on everybody's mind.

I am very concerned about how many risks it will bring me.

It's hard to know because the North Korean government is very unreasonable.

They'd bomb a passenger flight, or kidnap a Japanese teacher so they can teach Japanese in North Korea.

This place means a lot to me.

On my second day in Beijing, I wrote 'heaven' on the wall when I was drunk.

I wanted to support Sun Mu in any possible way.

We were sharing the same space and working together, and it was so much fun.

Growing up, we were in an environment where all the learning was based on Marx, Lenin, and Mao's ideas.

But now I value my ideas more than theirs.

Sun Mu has found freedom in this studio, and has found a person who completely supports him.

Without my brother, I don't think I would have been able to have my exhibition in Beijing.

That's real barbed wire.

Did you take them from the DMZ border?

- Yes. - Psh.

It's really from the border! That's why it means so much!

Be careful! The barbs are really sharp. I don't want you to get hurt.

They had just replaced the barbed wires that used to fence off the DMZ.

Think about it, those fences were there for decades.

I felt like I could say many things with these old barbed wires, so I took some.

I made flowers using the wires.

Interviewer: When you left North Korea for China

what was the thing that surprised you most?

Lights.

The glittering lights.

Plastic bags blowing in the wind.

Is this rotten capitalism?

Is this the rotten capitalism the North has been talking about?

Why are so many lights on?

I thought, "Did I make the wrong decision?

Maybe what I see isn't reality?"

In my heart I still believed Kim Il Sung and Kim Jong Il.

Interviewer: How long was it before you realized what you learned in North Korea was a lie?

About 10 years.

Still to this day.

This is me when I was young.

I used to sing since preschool.

I was on a team that travels all over North Korea,

performing in front of whole schools, or whole villages, pretty much anywhere.

Around the age of 8 or 9

I turned on the TV and saw Kim Il Sung

with a bunch of kids who had excelled at singing, dancing, painting, and writing.

Kim Il Sung was patting them on the back.

I thought to myself, "I can do that too."

"I can do that well,

and I can give Kim Il Sung pleasure!"

And that's how I started.

Interviewer: Did you ever get punished for drawing something you weren't supposed to draw?

Since I was a good student, I didn't draw anything I wasn't supposed to.

There are things you can't draw.

You can't draw Kim Jong Il,

and you wouldn't even dream about drawing naked women.

I did draw Kim Il Sung once.

It was when I was in high school.

If I got caught, I would have been killed.

So I locked my door and drew Kim Il Sung.

I thought I could draw him well, too.

Even my parents didn't know.

I proved to myself that I have the skills to draw Kim Il Sung exactly like his portrait.

But before it was even dry, I burned it.

When I first joined the army,

I learned that they select the ones that are good at writing and drawing from the new recruits.

One day they said, "Stand up if you are good at writing or drawing."

He asked if I could work on a poster for one day.

I answered that I could whip something like that up in an hour.

He didn't believe me at first.

Anyways, they ended up giving me one day to work on this small poster.

I said to them, "I can do this."

So I did it.

They said, "A real talent has joined the military."

The blueprint hasn't been given to me yet.

Cui: So you are thinking about a week for the installation process?

Sun Mu: A week should do it.

I'm going to install everything first

and have my wife come the day before the opening.

Another question,

will he be safe if he lives in Wangjing during the days of the exhibition?

Well, no one has to know who I am, right?

I'm not going to meet anyone.

Ask him if he wants to go out and take a look at my pieces

so he can have an idea of how we would set up.

Okay, let's go.

- The wires become music scores. - Great.

Wow, music comes out too?

Yeah, that's my theme song.

How big is it?

It's 5 meters wide.

I thought I should try this at least once.

I wanted to express the North Korean situation to people as they come into the exhibition.

So I intended to put these words at the entrance so the visitors have to step on the words

before coming in to see my artwork.

The three names representing the supreme dignity of North Korea are written there

Kim Il Sung, Kim Jong Il, and Kim Jong Un.

No one would even dream about stepping on those names.

I'm sure North Koreans staying in China, like embassy staffers will come.

They will have to step on it if they want to see the exhibition.

That might be pretty funny.

My exhibition won't make this art museum shut down down permanently, right?

I'm okay with my exhibition being shut down...

All this stuff, it's not possible this would shut it down?

He says that's not going to happen.

So many spies are in the Wangjing district, where our art museum is located.

If they know about the information about the exhibition

I think they will find the government to stop it.

Interviewer: So what do you remember from that night?

I don't want to say it.

Sorry.

It has had a big influence on me.

By the next day, we heard that many university students had died in Beijing the night before.

I don't know the exact death toll, because the whole history has been wiped out in China.

In China, it's risky to be a good artist.

I have been taking the risk for over 20 years, since I went to college.

Artists like us are considered sensitive, and are strictly supervised by the government.

This is my daughter. Her name is Liang Xiao Me.

This is my son.

His name is Liang Ji Yen. And we always call him Little Stone.

But in China, to be an artist may be the only way

you can feel a little feeling about freedom.

I've watched various documentaries about space and the universe since defecting.

Watching those, I felt this earth that we live on is a mere speck of dust

but the humans living here are arguing, fighting, and killing each other.

What a shame before the eyes of the aliens.

The stars here are not the same as the stars in my hometown.

There, stars were like a splash of white paint on a black canvas.

There was the Milky Way, and sometimes I could see stars moving, which I later found out were satellites.

That was good. Looking up at the night sky and viewing the stars.

Back then, I dreamt of being an astronaut and visiting the galaxy.

Visiting the moon and stars as an astronaut.

That's when I was young.

Now when I see the night sky, I feel just a fraction of what I felt as a boy.

My hometown was in the countryside so it had mountains, rivers, and goats living in the hills.

After Kim Il Sung died, we had such torrential rainfall and we lost a lot of crops.

The rations provided by the government started getting delayed.

At first it was for 1 month...

2 months...

3 months...

It kept getting delayed.

I don't think it was caused by Kim Il Sung's death.

Maybe Kim Jong Il used all those resources to secure his new regime

or for his leisure.

So many people didn't get the food that should have been distributed.

Every day we'd hear, "So and so in the next house has died."

"And someone in that house died too."

Looking from the outside, they were way too naive.

All they did was work.

But in spite of their hard work, they always struggle for food.

It breaks my heart.

I think this exhibition will become my first step to more exhibitions.

A stepping stone.

A transformation point.

I was not sure if this exhibition would even be possible.

I was nervous that there would be problems before it even starts.

As we installed the work, it hit me that my exhibition will really happen.

So I'm really happy.

I think he is largely motivated by the desire for freedom and a better life.

He is fortunate to have defected successfully, because I guess about 9 out of 10 defectors fail.

And failure could mean death.

This right here...

Once I crossed the Tumen River into China, I started writing down all my thoughts and feelings.

"Today is July 1st.

Under the street lamps, the signs of restaurants are lit up along the street

the light is coming into my empty room where I am sitting at the window, smoking.

Hey, you. What are you thinking about? Are you missing the hometown you've left behind?

Or are you dreaming about the new land you will soon enter?

The cigarette is burned out and I'm left with only ashes.

I flick my ash and stare out the window, silently.

Well, I have no one to talk to anyway."

I didn't have any intention of running away, because I thought North Korea was a great country.

I was just hungry.

One day, I climbed the mountain.

I made it to the top, and the view was overlooking a city in China.

I hid in the tobacco field and waited for night to come.

In that moment, everything including the sound of the insects sounded so loud.

I was staying silent,

nervous that guards might be nearby.

After what felt like an eternity...

Let's go.

I am being too hesitant.

With all my fears and worries, I put my feet into the river.

On the North Korean side the river wasn't that deep

But closer to the Chinese side, the riverbed fell away beneath me.

So I swam.

I was right beneath the Polaris star and the moon.

Looking at them, I started my journey.

Even until right before I crossed the river, I was certain that I'd come back.

But after I crossed the river, I went up the mountain and was wringing out my clothes,

I was looking back at North Korea,

and I thought, "Maybe I won't be able to go back."

If I were to get caught in China, I would get sent back to North Korea anyway.

Well then, South Korea is my land too, so maybe I've got to go to the south.

I thought that way would be better.

Even if I die, it's better to choose my own way.

So I left.

I wanted to go to South Korea, but I didn't know how.

It took about a week to get out of China.

I got close to the border

and I was trying to figure out how to get across.

There was a bus that was going along the border.

I thought if I hop off that bus after about 15 minutes, we would be at the right place.

So that's what I did. I got off and snuck across the border into Laos.

Once I made it safely to Thailand, all I did was art until I went to South Korea.

I still have a few pieces I drew back then.

I was assigned to live in Gongju, South Korea.

I was trying to meet up with South Korean artists, and soon found an art museum in Gongju.

The owner suggested that I apply to a nearby school in Chungnam province

but I wanted to go to a Hongik University in Seoul.

I went there and asked what I had to prepare, and they said the drawing test was all I had to take.

I was confident.

I went back and took the test

and then they sent me my acceptance letter.

"Hong-ik University graduation picture"

I realized that I too have a story to tell the world.

I too have a reason for my existence.

This is all I know how to do, so I'll just keep doing what I do.

I am going to use this to tell my story.

I'm someone who takes risks.

I can't stop an exhibition that I like so much just because of risks.

Whatever, that's my attitude.

Interviewer: Do you think there will be any threats on the day of the event?

Yes. I'm sure there will be a threat.

But I don't want to let them know who this crazy Sun Mu guy is and where he lives.

Sun Mu told me if he got caught, he would kill himself

because he doesn't want to incriminate his family.

He doesn't want the government to find out who he is.

That's why I can't be there as Sun Mu at the opening ceremony.

I can't be there, but my artwork will.

That's the same as me being there.

Interviewer: Can you tell us the meaning of the piece with the fish on a chopping board?

On a huge chopping board, there's a little fish

It's a boring fish

and big knives are pointing their blades at the little fish.

Who knows how that little fish will get sliced up?

I want to talk about how a powerful nation will carve off a bigger chunk with a bigger knife,

and smaller nations get smaller chunks.

Interviewer: Are you worried that your family could be in danger if they are with you?

I do worry a little, but when I'm with them I'm not Sun Mu the artist, I'm just the head of my family.

Well, I'm not sure if the Chinese government would acknowledge that difference.

We will just be a nice happy family traveling around China.

Safety is the biggest concern for me, since we're talking about family.

I don't have any room to worry about anything else but the safety of our family.

I hope my husband does well

but to be honest I'm worried about this exhibition.

It's not like I'm putting myself in danger purposely.

I'm just doing what I have to do.

I have to cut this giant board into pieces

all around here.

Isn't it fun?

If we take a look at this piece

It reads, "The view is good, but it's also a good place to live"

And there's a sassy girl looking back.

Her attire of a red scarf and ribbon in her hair

shows that she's a typical North Korean student.

But this "good place to live" is not the North Korea we know.

So when people read this they might ask, "Does the artist even know North Korea?"

Interviewer: What genre do you think Sun Mu belongs to as an artist?

I'll give a simple answer.

Political pop art.

I don't know a thing about pop art.

I just do this, or I do that, whatever I feel like doing.

I have no intention of defining my art as pop art.

I don't know and I'm not interested.

Interviewer: Who is your biggest influence?

I don't have anyone who influences me.

Oh wait, there is.

Kim Il Sung and Kim Jong Il.

Is that funny?

Wow, the press release on your exhibition has been viewed by 16,000 people.

It's spreading from person to person.

That's cool you can get those numbers.

Tomorrow there will be an opening reception, and after that we have the performance, right?

Yes, maybe like this

First, the opening. We start at four.

But it will be 4:30 when everyone gets here. We won't have much time.

I'll make an opening announcement at 4:30, marking the start of the exhibition.

The first thing to do is play his songs.

After the songs, it's the performance of the children, they will release the flag.

After the performance, it's his thank you speech.

So after the flag performance, we'll hear your words of gratitude.

The one we recorded, right?

Yes.

Tomorrow, I might come with a group of visitors and drift off without letting anyone know.

He's thinking about pretending to be security.

He should get his hair cut.

We better be careful tomorrow.

Since the kids are too young to know what's going on, once they catch sight of Sun Mu

they might give away Sun Mu's identity right away.

So then as soon as the ceremony ends, I'll take the kids upstairs.

I wish he wouldn't come to the opening to be completely honest.

I even had a dream that during the opening he is captured and taken away.

Sometimes I can't sleep because of that fear.

I do want to go to the gallery and see how they've set it up.

But I think the gallery wants me to stay quiet.

So I'll have to lay down this title of Sun Mu for a bit and go there as one of the visitors.

I've put so much effort into all those pieces.

And now we're coming to the opening...

It's sad that I can't stand there in public and say, "I am Sun Mu."

Because that's who I am.

Has anybody from the government come by yet today?

I think maybe in the morning two guys come here.

Want to see first...

I'm not sure who they are but from the clothes

and the feeling...

Seems like someone working in the government come here.

I got a call saying that I shouldn't come out.

It got Sun Mu and me all curious

so I ignored the call and went out.

Once I stepped out, I saw police officers all over the place.

I chose to go to the coffee shop on the second floor instead of the first so as to not raise suspicion.

On the second floor, I ran into Liang and Liang's wife, who were trying to hide.

As I was thinking to myself that I should pick up a pamphlet,

the owner of the coffeeshop asks

"Isn't your husband the artist doing the exhibition?"

I was so surprised. If I had stayed there any longer,

they would soon find out how I'm linked to Sun Mu and I could become their hostage in no time.

Ho Bin: Hello?

The situation is,

there are some people standing in front of the gallery

and some are wearing North Korean pin badges.

And there's Chinese police.

They are having a conversation now.

Cars and... a lot of police officers.

I didn't get there until later, around 3:30.

They began to stop people from getting into the museum.

Ho Bin: Yes, Mr. Cui. Are you still staying around here?

In my opinion, it'd be better if you stay away from here.

In my opinion, it'd be better if you stay away from here. Cui: I didin't even know what Sun Mu or we did wrong

Cui: I didin't even know what Sun Mu or we did wrong

but with the crowd of Chinese police and North Koreans outside the gallery,

the situation was confusing.

But I thought, we're not criminals.

There were North Koreans with Kim Il Sung badges going here and there.

Liang: There were many North Koreans outside of the museum.

They brought many North Koreans with lapel pins on their chest. There were dozens of them.

Why all the police?

I don't know.

Is this a non-profit exhibition?

Yes, yes.

Is this your full-time job or your part-time job?

It's considered a full-time job.

I met him at a workshop.

Is he not there now?

I just received his paintings.

So this gentleman mailed his paintings to a Korean who knows you, or is there someone else in between?

Well, Mr. Liang, what I just asked first is...

They started investigating. They interrogated me until really late, about 3 a.m.

The streets near the gallery were shut down.

People were only allowed to get out, not in, because the police were controlling it.

The banners outside the gallery were torn down too, by people brought by the police.

The whole thing happened very suddenly.

We had a lot on our minds, and our bodies were trembling in fear.

When we heard knocking on the door we were so scared, thinking it might be the police.

I'm staying back! I'm staying back.

"The exhibition is shut down temporarily. Thank you for understanding."

It looks like the North Koreans asked the Chinese authorities

to put a stop to the whole exhibition.

Looking at what happened that day, I think I underestimated the whole thing.

I could have been captured.

I did not expect all that.

With the help of Cui's wife, we were able to change our flight tickets so we could leave right away.

When we were in the taxi to the airport, I was worried about the possibility of someone following us

and at the airport, I was worried that the officials might detain us.

I even thought, "What if they stop us before we take off?"

The feeling I had at the moment our plane finally took off is indescribable.

At that time, I was worried that the North Korean government might do something merciless to me.

They might send someone to do something sketchy. That's what I worry about.

It did get me into a lot of trouble.

I was summoned to the police station several times after that day, which put me under a lot of pressure,

and my phone was monitored for a while.

There is no one in the Chinese art world that doesn't know about this exhibition.

Now, everyone knows that there is a North Korean defector artist.

I believe Sun Mu's art will eventually get into North Korea.

"If you kill a rooster, the dawn will come nonetheless."

That's how I see all of this unfolding.

Interviewer: If you were able to go back to North Korea, what would you want to do the most?

I'd load up my car with a pig, rice, and booze

and go and throw a big party in my hometown

so we could all eat till our stomachs burst, for once.

Interviewer: Is there something you want to do there, if you were allowed?

Well, I want to do an exhibition in Pyongyang.

In my dream one day

In my dream one day I found Kim Jong Il at a bar sitting by himself in the corner, looking lonely.

I found Kim Jong Il at a bar sitting by himself in the corner, looking lonely.

And I was dressed very nicely.

I thought to myself, "I believed in that man once, but he looks so shabby tonight."

I tried to go and give him something to eat, but his pride wouldn't let him take it.

I have these dreams...

On another day, I met Kim Jong Un in my dream.

He said, "Hey, I'll help an esteemed artist like yourself put on an exhibition in Pyongyang."

I said, "Is that so?

Well if that's what you say,

it'll happen."