Original subtitles

[GIR HUMMING]

[SQUEAKING]

♪ DOO DOO-DOO-DOO ♪

♪ DOO DOO DOO ♪

♪ DOO-DOO DOO-DOO-DOO ♪

[SUCKING]

♪ BOO-EE OOP-DOO DOO DOO DOO ♪

♪ DOO-DEE DOO DOO-DOO ♪

♪ DEE DEE DADA DEE DEE ♪

♪ DOO-DOO DOO DOO DOO-DOO ♪

[SCREAMS]

Dib: AAH!

[DIB GROANS]

I, UM--

Gir: INTRUDER.

[BEEPING]

[HUMMING]

HEY, WOULD YOU MIND PUTTING THIS SPY CAMERA INSIDE ZIM'S HOUSE

SO I CAN SPY ON HIS EVIL AND STUFF?

OKEY-DOKEY.

I SHOULD HAVE TRIED THIS A LONG TIME AGO.

AH!

AH!

AAH!

AT LAST, I'VE GOT A REAL VIDEO CAMERA

INSIDE ZIM'S HOUSE.

THIS TIME I'M PREPARED.

CAMERA DIB ONE: CHECK.

RECORD DRIVES ALPHA, BETA, GAMMA, STEVIE:

CHECK.

[ELECTRONIC TRILL]

WHAT?

I CAN'T RECORD ANY OF THIS

WITH THE DRIVES BROKEN.

COMPUTER, RUN THE DISK REPAIR.

TELL ME AS SOON AS THE DRIVES ARE FUNCTIONAL AGAIN.

[TINK TINK TINK]

AND NOW, ZIM,

TO DISCOVER YOUR NEXT EVIL PLAN.

[TINK TINK TINK]

[BEEPING]

[GIR SQUEAKING]

HEY, LOOK, THEY'RE GONNA START MAKING

ARTIFICIAL BEAVERS.

[GASPS]

HE'S AFTER OUR BEAVER TECHNOLOGY.

IS THIS HIS NEXT EVIL PLAN?

WELL...

TIME TO WORK ON MY NEXT EVIL PLAN.

TALK ABOUT PERFECT TIMING.

[BEEPING]

BUT NO DRIVES YET.

THE SWOLLEN EYEBALLS GOT TO SEE THIS.

AGENT DARKBOOTIE HERE.

I HAVE A VIDEO FEED FROM THE ALIEN'S HOUSE.

[GURGLING]

[GURGLING CONTINUES]

Darkbootie: HMM, AGENT MOTHMAN,

ONCE I TIED BIGFOOT'S TOE HAIRS TOGETHER.

IT WAS VERY FUNNY UNTIL HIS INSANE FIT OF HOWLING RAGE

ENDED IN TRAGEDY FOR A FAMILY OF CAMPERS.

MY POINT IS, JOKES DO NOT HAVE A PLACE

IN THE SWOLLEN EYEBALL NETWORK.

CALL BACK WHEN YOU'RE SERIOUS.

BUT--

[GROANS]

YES, TIME TO WORK ON MY EVIL PLAN...

OOH.

TO CRIPPLE THE HUMANS BY DESTROYING--

Gir: GUESS WHO MADE WAFFLES?

I'M NOT GOING TO EAT THAT.

AAH! AAH! AAH!

A-A-AAH!

ENOUGH!

I WILL TRY SOME, ALREADY.

WELL, THEY DON'T SEEM TO BE MAKING ME SICK.

YOU KNOW, THIS ACTUALLY MIGHT BE A GOOD WAY

TO BUILD A TOLERANCE TO THE HUMAN'S FILTHY FOOD.

OK, GIR, I WILL TRY--

HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE!

AND AS SOON AS I'M DONE WITH THESE WAFFLES,

I WILL DISCUSS MY EVIL PLAN.

YES!

THIS IS IT.

FOR THIS PLAN I WILL CREATE A--

HEY, THESE AREN'T BAD.

WHAT'S IN 'EM?

THERE'S WAFFLE IN 'EM.

YOU'RE LYING!

ANYHOW, GIR, I NEED A BREAK

FROM THE TALKING OF MY NEW PLAN.

LET'S HAVE SOME SILENCE FOR A BIT, HUH?

[ZIM CHEWING]

Gir: I LIKE TO MAKE WAFFLES.

[CHEWING CONTINUES]

[BURP]

[GAGS]

COME ON!

THE PLAN, ALREADY!

HEY, YOU KNOW WHO CAME BY TODAY?

WHO?

THAT UGLY NEIGHBOR LADY.

SHE WAS WEARING THIS HORRIBLE--HUH?

[ZIM SCREAMS]

OH, MIGHTY DOG!

THE GIANT FLESH-EATING DEMON SQUID HAS ESCAPED!

[ZIM GASPING]

AAH!

UHH! UHH! UHH!

UHH! UHH! UHH!

OH, MAN!

Zim: SECURITY, PROTECT YOUR MASTER!

AAH!

GIR, DEFENSIVE MODE.

WHEE!

HA HA HA HEE!

MMM!

Zim: EEE! OOH!

AAH!

UNH!

OOH!

THE EYEBALLS GOTTA SEE THIS!

AGENT NESSIE, HERE.

CHECK THIS OUT.

IT'S AMAZING.

A DOG EATING WAFFLES.

HA, STINKING HA!

DARKBOOTIE TOLD ME ABOUT YOU, MOTHMAN.

WHAT HAPPENED?

AH, HE ESCAPED.

OH, WELL.

HE WASN'T PART OF MY NEW PLAN, ANYHOW.

I'LL NEED A TEST SUBJECT.

BRING ME NICK!

THESE GOT PEANUTS AND SOAP IN 'EM.

HE'S GOT A HUMAN TEST SUBJECT.

[BRAIN PROBE SIZZLES]

AH, YES, UM...NICK,

NEURAL EXPERIMENT NUMBER 231.

AND HOW IS THE HAPPINESS PROBE

IN YOUR BRAIN DOING TODAY,

FILTHY HUMAN?

IT'S GREAT!

I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE THIS MAGICAL PLACE.

I'M SO HAPPY.

YAH-HA!

[BRAIN PROBE SIZZLES]

EXCELLENT.

WANT SOME WAFFLES?

ZIM'S MAKING HIM EAT WAFFLES!

THAT POOR KID.

I GOTTA HELP.

PLEASE, I NEED SOMEBODY

FROM THE EYEBALL NET TO BELIEVE ME.

AGENT DISEMBODIED HEAD.

A NEED A MOBILE EYEBALL UNIT TO--

AGENT MOTHMAN, STOP CALLING US!

THEN I'LL TRY THE F.B.I.

HELLO, THANK YOU FOR CALLING THE F.B.I.

MY NAME IS GREG. HOW MAY I HELP YOU?

I HAVE AN EMERGENCY. THERE'S A KID WHO'S--

HA HA HA!

HEY, HEY, YOU'RE DIB, RIGHT?

DID YOU EVER GET THAT NINJA GHOST

OUT OF YOUR TOILET?

YES, NO THANKS TO YOU.

THERE'S A KID IN TROUBLE.

[CHOKES]

[BRIAN PROBE SIZZLES]

IT'S GOOD.

MAN, THAT KID SURE LOVES HIS WAFFLES.

STAY RIGHT THERE.

WE'RE SENDING SOMEONE OVER TO BEAT YOU UP

FOR PLAYING JOKES ON THE F.B.I.

BUT LOOK AT THE BRAIN PROBE!

OH, ALL RIGHT.

WE'LL SEND SOMEONE TO INVESTIGATE

WHEN WE GET AROUND TO IT.

[BOTH GAGGING]

Gir: YOU LOOK LIKE YOU NEED WAFFLES!

MMM MMM MMM!

YAY.

GOTTA STALL HIM FOR TIME.

BLOATY'S PIZZA HOG.

WE DELIVER, I GUESS.

I NEED YOU TO DELIVER TO THIS ADDRESS RIGHT NOW.

WE GUARANTEE WE'LL SEE WHAT WE CAN DO.

[BRAIN PROBE SIZZLES]

MAYBE I BOUGHT SOME TIME.

THE SUSPENSE IS UNBEARABLE.

HURRY UP, F.B.I.!

[BRAIN PROBE SIZZLES]

AND NOW, GIR, TO TEST MY EVIL PLAN ON THIS CHILD.

Dib: NO!

NO MORE WAFFLES, GIR.

WAH HAH HAH!

NO, REALLY.

I'M STARING TO FEEL SICK.

AAH!

A-A-AAH!

ALL RIGHT, I'LL EAT JUST ONE MORE PIECE.

[GAGGING]

AAH!

THE HIDEOUS MUTANT SQUID HAS ESCAPED AGAIN

AND HAS CREATED AN ARMY OF CYBORG ZOMBIE SOLDIERS

TO DO ITS EVIL BIDDING!

NO, STAY BACK!

STAY BACK!

NO-O-O!

[BEEP]

[WHIMPERING]

OW!

AGENT DARKBOOTIE, ANSWER.

AGENT DARKBOOTIE!

BOOTIE!

OH, IT'S HORRIBLE!

A HORRIBLE ARMY OF CYBORGS RENDING ZIM'S VERY FLESH.

OH, THE CARNAGE MAKES ME SO HAPPY.

[DOORBELL RINGS]

Man: HELLO, BLOATY'S PIZZA.

HEH HEH.

HOO-WHEE!

NOW THE CYBORGS ARE EATING PIZZA

AND THE F.B.I. IS BEING COCOONED

TO FEED THE SQUID BABIES

THAT JUST FLEW IN FROM THE WINDOW.

HA! WHOO!

WHAT'S THAT THING ZIM'S GOT?

Zim: DON'T MAKE ME USE THIS.

I'LL DO IT.

[EXPLOSION]

Gir: ♪ DOO DOO DOO ♪

WHAT IS IT, MOTHMAN?

OH, YOU MAKE ME SICK.

NO, WAIT!

THERE WAS A MUTANT AND CYBORGS AND--

[BEEPING]

YES, THE RECORD DRIVES ARE FIXED.

I CAN SHOW IT TO THE EYEBALLS LATER.

YOUR WAFFLE-EATING DAYS ARE OVER ZIM.

WELL, THANKFULLY I WAS ABLE TO REPROGRAM

THOSE CYBORGS AT THE LAST MINUTE

AND SEND THEM OFF TO DO HORRIBLE THINGS TO THE HUMANS.

BUT MY EVIL PLAN...

HEY, I FORGOT WHAT MY EVIL PLAN WAS.

OH, WELL.

GIR, YOUR WAFFLES HAVE SICKENED ME.

FETCH ME THE BUCKET.

[GIR SQUEALS]

NO! THE PLAN!

WHAT WAS THE PLAN?

[ZIM THROWING UP]

OH, WELL,

AT LEAST I HAVE SOMETHING RECORDED ON DISK.

IT WASN'T A TOTAL LOSS.

NO-O-O!

WHATEVER.