All language subtitles for The Apprentice (2024)

And I want to say this
to the television audience

I've made my mistakes,

but in all of my years
of public life,

I have never profited,

never profited from
public service.

I've earned every cent.

And in all of my years of
public life,

I have never obstructed
justice.

And I think too that I can say

that in my years of
public life,

I welcome this kind of
examination

because people have got to know
whether or not

their president's a crook.

Well, I'm not a crook.

I've earned everything I've got.

"Anti, Anti, Anti" by
The Consumers

There's nothing like this place.

There's nothing like it.

You know, the Vanderbilts
and the Kennedys,

they all came here.

Do... do you see the old guy
over there

with the pretty young model?

That's Daniel K Ludwig,

the shipping magnate,

one of the only two billionaires

in the United States.

Then over here you got
Si Newhouse.

He owns half of all
the newspapers

and magazines in the country.

Anybody who is anybody
comes here to this place.

There's nothing like it.

Why are you so obsessed
with these people?

Well, I mean, I'm not obsessed
with these people,

I just, uh...

I'm curious, you know,
about people.

There's a skill to being
a billionaire.

It's a... it's a talent,

you have to be born with it.

You have to have a certain
gene, you know.

It's a pretty cool place.

Yeah, and they say
I'm the youngest

member ever admitted.

That must be a big thing.

It is, it's a very big thing.

I'm just gonna go powder
my nose.

Okay, sure.

Excuse me.

I'm Russell.

My friend wants to know if
you'd join us for dinner.

Uh, well, I'm actually leaving,
so, uh...

He's a long-time member.

He wants to congratulate you
on passing

the selection committee.

Well, that's totally,
uh, untrue.

Sonny Liston, was, uh,
well, fine,

he was arrested, uh,
nineteen times.

But, uh, the guy was a champion

so, you can't,
uh, blame him for it.

- Well, hello there.
- How's it going?

- How are you?
- I'm fine, thank you.

Have a seat.

We're not gonna bite.

There you go.

What's your name, handsome?

I'm Donald Trump.

Donald Trump, nice to meet you.
Roy Cohn.

The Roy Cohn, from all
the papers and everything?

That's right, uh, the Roy Cohn
from all the papers,

that's right.
- Yeah, you're brutal.

I'm brutal, that's right.

He's the guy who put the
Rosenbergs in the chair.

The Rosenbergs in
the fucking chair!

On that count, uh,
guilty as charged.

But, uh, whatever I do,
I do it for America.

- Well, uh...
- What are you drinking?

Um, I'll just have some
ice water.

- Ice water?
- Living on the edge, eh?

Oh, yeah.

Meet my pals, uh,
this is, uh, Carmine Galante.

- Nice to meet you.
- And, uh, this, uh,

voluptuous gentleman over here
with the diabetes is,

uh, Tony Salerno.

Can I call you Fat Tony?
Are you gonna get...?

Call me whatever the fuck
you want, Roy.

- Good.
- You're my attorney.

- Hello.
- Uh, you don't call him Fat Tony

because, uh, you might end up,
uh, in the East River

or something like that.
- Hello.

Uh, everybody else is not
worth naming.

I, uh, I love getting to know
people,

it's important for my business,

so, it's really nice to meet
you all.

Mr Salerno, it's really nice to
meet you.

What is your business, Donald?

Real estate. I'm, uh,

Vice President of
The Trump Organization.

Oh, you're Fred Trump's kid?

That's right.

He's Fred Trump's kid.

It sounds like, uh, your father
is a little tangled up.

It looks like he could use
a good lawyer.

But tell us about it.

Right now, the government
and the NAACP are suing us.

Uh, they're saying our
apartments are segregated.

This is America, you can rent to

whoever the hell
you goddamn want.

But our lawyer wants us to pay
a huge fine to settle

and we can't,
it's gonna bankrupt us

and ruin the company, so...
- You tell the feds

to fuck 'emselves.

Damn straight!

File a lawsuit.

Always file a lawsuit,

fight 'em in court.

Uh, make 'em prove

you're discriminating.

Well, I guess, uh...

might have to get us, uh,
a new lawyer.

Of course, it, uh, helps if

Nixon and the Attorney General

are your pals.

Well, are you available?
I mean...

Uh, what are you, some kind of
a faggot?

"Street Man" by Brooklyn Dreams

♪ Alright ♪

♪ Street man ♪

♪ Street man on his own ♪

♪ So young and so alone ♪

♪ He gives his all just to
change the world ♪

♪ You can change the world ♪

♪ You can... you hoo-hoo-hoo ♪

♪ You can change the world ♪

♪ Change the world ♪

♪ Change the world ♪

♪ Street man ♪

♪ You can change it ♪

♪ You can ♪

♪ You can change it ♪

♪ Aaaah ♪

♪ You can change it ♪

♪ You can ♪

Mrs Nathanson?

Yeah.

The rent.

You got it? Is that all?

I think so.

You think so?

Yeah. Yeah.

And if I count it
and it's not there,

what am I supposed to do?

It's just the one month.
I just hurt my back,

I just hurt myself, that's all,

and I had to go to hospital.

You know what that's like.

Let's hope you're alive
next month.

Get the rent. Get the rent.

Or if not, this is it.

Mrs Thompson.

You bloodsuckers.

Half?

You're not real.

I am very, very real.

You're in my head!

Mr Granger, please.

Come on.

Fuck you!

Fuck you!

Fucker!

These NAACP faggots
call me racist.

Frederick, please, enough.

Mary, they call me a racist.

How can I be racist

when I have a black driver,
Mary?

No language.

How can that be?

Pleasant conversation.

I'm not racist.

No politics.

You think that's funny, Freddy?

Would you get your elbow

off of the table, please?

Yes, Sir.

Dad, the truth is
we're being sued,

we need the lawsuit behind us,

and I need to bid on
the Commodore,

and I think with Roy,
we have a chance.

Not this crap about your hotel, please.

Roy Cohn is not the guy
that's gonna help us, okay?

He's a crook.

He's been indicted three times.

He's never been convicted,
by the way.

The man's a genius.
He ran McCarthy's show

when he was basically
a teenager,

and he's pals with Nixon
himself. He's vicious.

You don't think I've tried
pulling strings

with Beame and Rockefeller?

They're no help.

The government wants to kill us.

Just, just take the meeting,
that's all I'm saying.

Just, just meet with him to
discuss, that's all.

I think maybe Donnie's right.

Why not meet with Cohn,

get a second opinion?

Says the airline pilot.

My first-born son

is a goddamn bus driver
with wings.

Frederick, please.

Do you know what kind of an
embarrassment

that is for us?

Whenever... whenever I'm asked

about my family,

I don't mention you, Freddy.

That's how embarrassed I am
about you.

Frederick, enough.

Do you like the music?

I do.

Oh, hey, how are you?

- Good, how are you?
- Good to see you.

Oh, my God, you look beautiful.

- So do you.
- Why didn't you call me?

- I'm busy.
- Oh, she's busy.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God, the stories I can
tell you about her.

You really know your way
around here, huh?

Well, come here often enough,

you get to know a few people.

Oh, I can see that.

Maybe loosen up a little,
Donnie,

you look like a security guard.

My God, those summers
were the worst.

I mean, I would spend
the whole time

counting the planes taking off
from Idlewild.

I was like that the whole time.

He used to make me pick
the nails off the floor

to save money.
- He still does that, Freddy.

Even now.

He would say to me,
"You keep an eye,

anybody who takes too long
on their smoke break,

you tell me about it."

And he would give me a quarter

for every...
every guy that I tattled on.

It was me against them.

Well, you probably got rich, huh?

Probably got rich those summers.

I want you to be happy.

Let me get another drink.

No, no, come on, come on.

We're alright, thank you,

thank you very much.
- Okay,

I don't need my little brother.

You think I don't have money?
I got money.

I know you do,
but it's my treat, okay?

Take your hat.
You're gonna need this.

Vic, I'm thinking a three-storey
atrium, alright?

And this whole side
all the way down,

I want it cladded in mirrored
glass, okay?

So, when you're across
42nd Street

or you're coming up
the Park Avenue ramp

and you look up, you're gonna
see the Chrysler Building,

the Grand Central Station,

all the landmarks

reflected in that glass.

It's gonna change the whole
ambience

of the neighbourhood.

It's gonna be a beautiful thing.

What do you think?

Yeah.

We're done.

We're done? Vic?

What, what, what are you saying?

If you were serious,
I'd be talking

to your father, not you.

Who the hell wants to build
a luxury hotel

on 42nd Street?

I do, okay?

I will eat, breathe, and sleep,

and shit this job
until it's done.

This is 1,600 rooms right
next to Grand Central.

Hey, how you doing?
You wanna have some fun?

This is my wife here,
you wanna fuck my wife?

- Uh, no, I'm fine, thank you.
- Her tight ass pussy's

all yours, 40 bucks.

I'm alright, thank you.

You saying my wife ain't hot?

Hey, guy, guy, come on.
No loitering.

New York is the greatest city
in the world,

and when it comes back,
and it will big time,

there's gonna be one hell of
a lot of money.

People are gonna get rich,
Vic, like you wouldn't believe.

Come on, Vic, think outside
the box, alright?

I can't deal with you until you
get the feds off your back.

You got that?

Vic.

It's gonna be great!

David, how are you?

How you doing?

How you doing?

Donald Trump from
the other night, remember?

Right, of course.

Mr Cohn, great suit.

Uh, Donald Trump,
I met you the other night.

Uh, Russ, could you
get my table, please?

Uh, listen, about the lawsuit,

I wanted to talk to you about...

uh, you know,
from before, with my father.

Look, uh, I'm here to have fun,
okay, kid?

Don't ruin my night.

Now, I gotta take a piss.

Mr Cohn, Sir,
you have to represent us.

Oh, you've gotta be kidding me.

Well, I'm sorry to follow you to
the bathroom,

but you, you, you, you have to
represent us.

The DOJ is trying to ruin
our lives.

It's, it's, it's a disgrace,
it's an injustice.

I'm trying to take a leak.

They're gonna force us to rent

to welfare cases and,

and they're gonna ruin
the buildings.

Please, I'm begging you, Sir.

I'm, I'm standing in
a bathroom here

with, with, with this guy,

and I'm... and I'm begging you
from the heart

to just please, as the only guy,

the only guy that's got the guts
and the balls

to take on these bullies,
to consider this case.

Well, uh...

I never liked bullies.

The liberals hate capitalism
and, uh, strength

and everything that people like
us stand for,

truth, justice,
and the American way.

Okay, what they wanna do is

they wanna take money from,
uh, you and me

and, uh, spread it around to,
uh, deadbeats on welfare.

- Uh...
- I'm fine, thank you.

They're worse than Nazis,
believe me.

I, I, I don't do that.

Oh. Well, uh, I got news
for you, kid,

you do if you want me to listen.

Cin-cin.

Drink up, Donnie Boy.

So, uh, I don't have all night.

Okay, so...

the suit says we violated
the Fair Housing Act.

Don't tell me what the law is,

uh, tell me who the judge is.

Edward Neaher.

That's bad, he's a...
he's a boy scout.

That's bad?

It's not good.

You know what, Donald,
this whole civil rights deal,

it stinks,
the way herring stinks.

You tell me, how many,
uh, stuffed shirt leftists

want their little Johnnies
and Janes in school

with little negroes?

Zero.

Right? And they say I'm, uh,
Lucifer incarnate.

At least I'm honest,
right, babe?

It's true.

Well, the other night,

you were talking about...

Come on, drink up.

I mean, uh, I, I was, uh...

you were talking about the,
um, suing the government.

I mean, were you serious
about that, or...?

I'm serious as a heart attack.

Okay, to you.

Thank you.

To Donald.

"Rock Your Baby" by George McRae

I'm... I'm telling you, Roy,
I'm gonna...

I'm gonna take New York.

I'm gonna take New York
and bring it back.

I'm gonna do it. You watch.

You watch. I'm gonna take
that Commodore,

I'm gonna make it the best
fucking hotel in the city.

I'll take the Penn Central,

I'll take the Yards,
the Hudson Yards.

I've got all these ideas,
and that's...

that's the problem
with my father.

You know what, Donald?
You are...

People...

You're gorgeous, you know that?

You're a real thoroughbred.

- Roy...
- You're one of a kind, okay?

I'm telling you,
you're one of a kind.

- I think, uh...
- You know, you're not

too bad yourself.

Well, uh, I mean, I'm not much
to look at, but...

You're pretty good, you know,
you're good.

I bet you fuck a lot,
don't you, Donald?

You look like somebody who,
uh, fucks a lot.

I think you're right.

♪ Open up your heart ♪

♪ And let the lovin' start ♪

♪ Woman, take me in your arms ♪

♪ Rock your baby ♪

I like this kid.

I feel sorry for him.

Yeah, I can see that.

Go see if he's okay.

I'm not, uh, Bunny Lindenbaum
and this isn't Avenue Z.

- Right.
- Powerful people, they hire me

because I'm not the typical, uh,
bill-by-the-hour,

do-nothing shyster.

I won't be pushed around.

You're the client,
but you work for me.

That means, uh,
you do what I say,

when I say it, 100 percent.

Absolutely, totally.

Totally, whatever you say.

And, uh, if you throw up on my
scarlet piping,

uh, you're a dead duck.

My office, 12:30 tomorrow.

Yes?

Hello. This is Donald Trump,
uh, for Mr Cohn.

Thank you so much.
- Donald who?

Donald Trump.

Come on in, Donald.

No. No, I'm telling you,
it was not in his briefcase,

it wasn't alleged to be
in his briefcase.

I was in court, I saw
the complaint, and you didn't.

Did you?

Okay.

No, you're not listening to me.

No.

Just get the goddamn injunction

and, uh, shut up already.

Uh, where were we?

Murdoch prepping his bid for
the New York Post.

Needs due diligence on
owner, Dolly Schiff.

Due diligence?
Uh, what's to know?

She's a communist cunt.

Tell Rupert that she's a robber

baron's wet dream.
Thank you, Rosario.

And ripe
for the picking.

Phelps divorce.

When is that?
- A week Monday.

Because I wanna be armed to
the goddamn teeth

when I put her yutz of
a husband on the stand.

Morning, sweetheart.

We also have
to deal with

the latest subpoena
from the IRS.

Those geniuses at the IRS.

I mean, it's a total vendetta.
- Fucking IRS.

Charlie, come here, you schmuck.

- Who let the mutt in here?
- That's Charlie Brown.

Give him a... give him a kiss,
Charlie.

- Oh.
- Oh, yeah.

Nice. Be careful, uh, he might
try and blow you.

91.

92.

Uh, well, that's the lawsuit,

in case you wanna take a look.
- 94.

All about the Fair Housing
Act...

I'm... I'm doing my sit-ups,
Donald,

hang on.

95.

96.

Don't touch them, please.

Oh, I'm sorry.
- 98...

- 199...
- Wow.

Got quite a collection, Roy.

200.

President Nixon,
that's pretty incredible.

Nixon? Yeah, he's a good friend.

He's a close personal friend.

Did you wanna read the...
uh, lawsuit?

I don't need to read
the lawsuit.

I told you, it stinks.

Smells like, uh, my armpit
smells right now.

Yeah. I mean, in reality,
I mean,

I mean, we do rent
to black people.

- You do?
- Yeah, 10 percent

of our buildings go to black
people.

It's just... it's just they have
to make

four times the amount of
the rent

in... in terms of the income

to, to be approved.

Sounds to me like they're
discriminating

against you.
- That's right, they are.

And, uh, it should be called
the Unfair Housing Act.

It's your building, uh, you can
do whatever the hell you want.

Sure sounds nice when you
say it, Roy, you know.

Where's my cheque?

Oh, I got it right here.

Okay, uh, we're in business.

You got a great name. Trump.

Well, may end up on that wall
one day.

- You could be on that wall.
- It'd be nice.

Yeah, you could be on
that wall, why not?

How do you mix with all those
people?

Everybody wants to suck
a winner's cock

is what it comes down to.

I've been indicted three times,
I won 36-0.

Government 0, Roy Cohn 36.

- I'm a winner.
- How do you win?

You wanna know how to win?

I'm gonna let you in on
a little secret.

There's rules.

Roy Cohn's three rules of
winning.

The first rule is the simplest,

attack, attack, attack.

Civil Rights, Katz.

I hope the putz you're
schtupping's got real money,

because, uh, after
I get you fired,

you're sure gonna need it.

Excuse me?

Unless you drop
your baseless litigation,

I am countersuing the Justice
Department for $100 million,

and you are gonna rue the day
that you ever filed this suit.

Who is this?

It's Roy Cohn, calling on behalf

of my client, Donald J. Trump.

Always let it ring twice.

To whom do I owe the pleasure?

Mr Cohn, this is J. Stanley
Pottinger,

Head of Civil Rights Division,

United States Department
of Justice.

Wow, I'm sure your mother's
very proud.

How dare you threaten one of
my attorneys?

I should have you disbarred
for speaking to her that way.

Stan, Stan, bubala,
why don't you calm down?

That never happened.
- Barbara Katz has worked for me

for 20 years.
You threatened her.

And now she...
- Sounds like

maybe she's hormonal,
or something like that.

What did you say?

Rule two, admit nothing.

Deny everything.

Objection.

Uh, the Civil Rights Division

did not file a lawsuit.

Frankly, it compiled a, uh,
48-page, uh, press release,

as far as I can tell.

Now, the government has
failed to spell out

one single fact concerning
alleged

discriminatory practices
against blacks by the Trumps.

Uh, I motion to have this case
dismissed

on summary judgement.
- Overruled.

Councillor, continue.

Thank you, Your Honour.

Agent Green, what led you

to believe that you were denied

a lease at Trump Properties
based on your race?

Well, not only did
the newspaper advertise...

That's Walter, DOJ,
he runs the show.

I saw three
Caucasian couples

approved before me.

- Objection, speculation.
- Mr Cohn...

How can you say for sure they
were Caucasian?

Mr Cohn, please allow
Agent Green

to answer the question.

I've seen Puerto Ricans
whiter than my tush

after a long winter.

Your Honour...

- Mr Cohn.
- Marvin, how are you?

Good to see you.
- Good to see you.

How do you feel about your
chances?

Uh, the government's case

is phoney as a
three-dollar bill.

Uh, let's just say we're in
a very strong position.

Mr Trump, do you think you
can beat the US government?

I feel very good about this.

One more question, Mr Trump.

Mr Trump, one more question.

We're really gonna win,
aren't we?

Are you out of your mind?
Of course not.

- What?
- Donald, uh,

your case is a total dog.

But, but you said they had
no evidence.

Your leasing agents marked
black applications with a C.

That C didn't stand for cotton
candy now, did it?

Raul, I'm late for a little, uh, rendezvous.

Step on it.

Roy, you said we'd win
hands-down.

Rule three, this is the most
important rule of all, okay?

No matter what happens...

Does he have to drive this fast?

...no matter what they say
about you,

no matter how beaten you are,

you claim victory and never
admit defeat.

Never admit defeat, Donald.

You want to win,
that's how you win.

Walter, my good friend,
what a nice surprise.

It's, uh, nice to see you too,
Roy.

Your bulldog, Katz, uh,
she's being tough on us.

Barbara is one of our best.

You know, uh,
this case isn't fair.

You and I both know that.

Well, you know what, Roy,

justice is complicated.

- Justice is complicated?
- Yeah.

You know what could get
complicated, Walter?

Is a, uh, a married man

committing certain indiscretions

with the, uh, cabana boys in
Cancun.

The last I checked,

homosexuals were barred from

federal civil service.

What do you want, Roy?

Why don't you do the right thing

and make this case go away?

You know I can't do that.

Imagine your wife

reading in the Post that, uh...

- Roy...
- ...her husband's a fairy.

Is that what you want?

Say hello to Mira and the kids.

- What? I'm not gonna bite.
- That was tremendous.

Why don't you sit down?

You're all the way over
in Alaska. Come here.

Well...

What?

I don't know, Roy. I mean, I...

I'm pretty sure what
I just saw was, uh...

I, I, I don't even know what...
what to think of that.

I mean, I'm...

I'm speechless.

Here's the thing, Donald, uh,

you played, uh, you played
sports, right?

So, they probably taught you,
uh,

play the ball, not the man.

But, uh, you see, in reality,

it's the total opposite.

You play the man, not the ball.

Okay? To get what you want,
forget the ball.

You get the man.

This is a nation of men,
not laws.

And, uh, you don't care?

It's an advantage...

to, uh, not care what people
think of you.

Fuck what people think of you.

There is no right and wrong.

There is no, uh, morality.

There is no truth
with a capital "T".

It's a construct.

It's a fiction. It's man-made.

None of it matters except
winning.

That's it.

To leave office before my term
is completed is abhorrent

to every instinct in my body.

But as president,
I must put the interests

of America first.

I shall resign the presidency

effective at noon tomorrow.

It is the first priority

of my presidency

to sustain and strengthen

the mutual trust and respect...

which must exist...
- Hello?

Never answer your own phone,

uh, like some loser.
Get a secretary.

- How's it going?
- Listen, the judge, uh,

called with news about
the suit.

Well, what did they say?

Well, the government folded

like a cheap tent.

Uh, we settled with no fine,

no admission of discrimination.

Uh, so you won big, kiddo.

Roy, that's...
that's incredible. I... I...

Now get ready, I'm gonna pick
you up in about an hour, okay?

You're... you're a genius.

Uh...

Listen, uh, Judy, about
a hundred reporters

were crawling up my ass
to get this interview,

and I gave you the exclusive.

There you go.

Uh, yes, hello, Judy, uh, this
is Donald Trump.

Very excited... very excited
to talk to you.

Be excited,
don't say you're excited.

So, Donald, now that the
lawsuit is behind you,

what do you want to do next?

Uh, well...

I intend to acquire
the Commodore,

and, uh, I'm planning on making
it the, the best

uh, and the finest building
in... in the city,

maybe... maybe the country.

In the world, Judy,
in the world.

It's gonna be the finest
building in the world.

It's gonna be a spectacular
hotel.

Absolutely spectacular.

First class.

And, uh...

That sounds very ambitious.

Where do you get the drive?
You're still so young, Donald.

I've got, I've got flair
and I'm smart, so I...

I think that's gonna
make me successful.

- Slow down, slow down...
- But I also wanna stay humble.

I'm...

Uh, sorry Judy, listen let's,
uh, do rest in person,

and, uh, bring a photographer, okay?

Sorry, Roy.

- Uh, no, I mean, listen...
- You caught me off guard.

It's you're life.
Uh, you got a ways to go,

but, uh, you're learning.

You know, I should've talked
to Dad,

before announcing
the Commodore.

He'll be convinced when he
reads about it

in the Times, okay?

- Well...
- You create your own reality.

It's not that easy.

Truth is a malleable thing.

- But he's...
- These are too tight, I think.

Alright, well... I'm sorry.

You have kind of a big ass,
you know that?

You gotta work on that.

We... we try something else.

Look, my dad is tough, Roy.

He's very tough.
- Well, that's why you gotta

spread the news,
like it's already happening.

It's just, you can't push him
around very easily.

Fine, okay, fine, then, uh,
let him push you around.

Is that what you want?

No, I don't.

Look.

Very, very fine fabric. Brioni.

What is that, merino wool?

Looks expensive.

How much is this?

- $1,100.
- Okay, that's...

Okay, we'll take it,
and a matching shirt and tie.

- I... I can't pay for this.
- Forget it, okay?

Forget it. Listen, here.

I don't need your money.

You'll pay me back, uh,
with your friendship, okay?

Quid pro quo. Uh...

you be a friend to me,
I'll be a friend to you.

Okay? That's, uh,
that's... that's the pact, okay?

If you look like
a million bucks,

I look like a million bucks.

Is this a guy, uh, is this a guy
from Flushing,

or is this a guy from
5th Avenue?

You know what I'm saying?
- No, 5th Avenue.

- That's right.
- 5th Avenue's where we wanna be.

- That's right.
- Exactly.

We're over 20 minutes,
can't we at least...

I've already explained,
this is a members-only club.

Only members are allowed inside.

They can become members.

They can file the papers right
now.

I've asked you once to leave.

I want to speak to your boss.

- I am the boss. The answer's no.
- You're not the boss.

- I am the boss.
- I want to speak

with the real boss.

- I'm sorry you're upset.
- Excuse me.

Um, what's the issue?

I'm sorry, Mr Trump, I was just
trying to get them to leave.

Well, actually, they're on
the list.

We don't need your help.

And what list would that be?

The, uh, Roy Cohn list.

My apologies, Mr Trump.

Why don't you take
your coat off?

Thank you very much.

Hi ladies,
let me get those coats for you.

I'm Donald Trump.

You're such a...
what is the word?

- Gentleman.
- Stereotype.

A man who thinks women
need his help.

Well, you, uh, you were totally
failing without me,

so, I guess you needed my
help a little bit.

What's the catch, gentleman?

No catch.

Enjoy your night.

Thank you.

Ladies, may I get you anything
else tonight?

- I'm good, thank you.
- I'm good too.

The cheque, please.

Mr Trump took care of it.

Oh.

Well, then.

Mr Trump has a crush on
somebody.

Thank you. Alright.

Shall we get out
of here?

Yes.

"Yes Sir, I Can Boogie"
by Baccara

- Excuse me?
- Hello?

Hey, come on, come on.

Excuse me?

He... he's not even...
he looked at me.

Excuse me?

- Do you need a ride?
- We don't need a ride.

It looks really cold
out there, and, uh...

- I'm not cold.
- Let me give you a ride.

- Come on.
- Listen, come on.

♪ Sure makes me wonder ♪

♪ If you know what
you're looking for ♪

You didn't tell me your name.

Ivana Zelnícková.

Ivana Zelnícková?

- Zelnícková.
- Zelnícková.

Thank you for the ride.

I really wanna see you again, okay?

I'd love to, uh, I'd love to
take you to dinner.

Thank you, Donald, but...
I have a boyfriend.

So what? He doesn't let you eat?

Goodnight, Donald.

He's spicy.

"Donald J. Trump is tall,
lean, and blonde,

with dazzling white teeth,

and looks ever so much like
Robert Redford."

I'm so proud of you, my love.

I'm so proud.

They even called me, uh, controversial.

Donald, it would have been
appropriate

for you, um, to talk to me
before you announced

your Commodore plan.

Now it looks like

I don't run my own
goddamn company.

Well...

not if you back me up.

Donald, the Chrysler Building
is in foreclosure.

- Well, the Chrysler Building...
- And you wanna open

a hotel around the corner.
- I, I understand,

the Chrysler Building
is a landmark,

so, it's absolutely fine.

It's like adding a deckchair
to the Titanic.

Dad, sooner or later
you might have to

accept the fact
that I could be right,

and maybe I know what I'm doing.

Look, Donald,

I respect what you've done, son.

I really hope so. I hope so.

I hope so, Dad, I really do.

Donald...

I gotta go.

Really, Frederick?

Hey, Russell, uh, where's Roy?

Donald, what's a nice boy like
you doing at a party like this?

How do you know Roy?

He's, uh, he's my lawyer.

Hmm.

Mine too.

I'm in real estate.

Hmm.

What do you do?

I'm an artist.

Oh.

What do you make?

Anything I can sell.

Making money is art.

It's true.

It is. It is.

Are you successful?

Roy.

There he is, the, uh,

the boy with the golden hair.

I say, uh, if you're indicted,
you're invited.

Uh, the suit looks great.

Come on, let's, uh,
let's mingle.

Dick, uh, how are you?
This is Donald Trump.

- Oh, how's it going?
- New friend, new client.

Uh...

Listen, Roy, I hear Ed Koch
is gonna run.

Oh, well, he'll never win,
he's a total homo.

He's a homo?

- That's what I heard, right?
- Listen, Abe's worried,

he wanted me to talk to you.
- Okay, call me tomorrow,

I'm at the party right now, okay?

Dick is the, uh, deputy mayor.

So, he's a good friend.

Gentlemen, I want you to meet
a, uh, real prince.

- This is Donald Trump.
- Mr Murdoch.

Nice to meet you.

- George Steinbrenner.
- Of course. It's a great honour.

He knows who you are, George.

I mean, are you kidding me?

Sir, I used to play ball.

Coach said I could've gone pro.

What the hell happened?

Well, I realised why play

on the field when I
can just own the stadium?

- I like that.
- Talk to you later.

Rupert is gonna be key for you.

You wanna get quoted in the
Post and all the papers a lot,

you know, keep your name in
the papers.

Oh, that's my accountant.

- Uh, really?
- Uh, listen,

you'd better work on
the, uh, Commodore pitch, okay?

Brush up on that, because
I got you a sit-down

with the CEO of Hyatt.

- Jay Pritzker?
- Yeah, Pritzker, who else?

Roy, that's amazing.

- Roy, that's...
- Okay?

- That's incredible.
- Estelle!

On behalf of the, uh, sadistic,
inhumane conservatives

in this country, I wanna
welcome, uh, all of you.

It's great to see so many old
friends and, uh, new ones.

I love this country.

I think of America as my most
important client.

Some of you are my clients,
and I hate to break it to you,

but America is more important.

We are the last line of defence

between a free world

and a, uh, totalitarian
hellscape.

God bless America!

God bless America!

- God bless America!
- God bless America!

"Ghost Rider" by Suicide

♪ Ghost Rider motorcycle hero ♪

♪ Hey baby, baby, baby
he's a-lookin' so cute ♪

♪ Sneak around-round-round
in a blue jump suit ♪

♪ Ghost Rider motorcycle hero ♪

Where is Roy? Have you seen him?

- I think he went upstairs.
- Okay. Alright.

I guess I'll look around.

♪ Hey baby, baby, baby
he's a-screamin' the truth ♪

Get the fuck away... away
from me!

Well, gentlemen, this is
a monumental opportunity.

The Grand Central area is one of

the most important
locations in the city.

The Chrysler Building is there,
the Pan Am Building is there,

the whole area is monumental.

And the key to the whole area

is the old Commodore Hotel,

which is just sitting there
boarded up

and waiting to be transformed.

I wanna make it something
very special,

I wanna build an incredible,

glorious, glamorous hotel

that's gonna put people to work

in the construction trades,

it's gonna save hotel jobs.

It's been a brutal year
for New York,

we're... we're one step away
from depression,

and we have to bring it back.

Thank you.

Commodore Hotel is a great idea,

but not only is it in shambles,

but everything around it
as well.

Everything on that city block

is going to need to be rebuilt.

I'd love to do that.

I think that destination's
a great word.

You know, it brings people
to... to Manhattan.

A lot of Europeans are waiting

to come back to the city.

Mr Pritzker, any questions?

Just one.

Between the unions and taxes...

how will you make money?

Um... well, that's a... that's
a really interesting question.

Um...

well, there won't be
any taxes, Jay,

because, uh, we're gonna get
a tax abatement from the mayor,

who is begging developers
to build, okay?

And if I tell him that the CEO
of Hyatt is committing,

then I can get him to waive
the property taxes.

The city is broke,
and you're saying

they're gonna forego taxes?

I'm saying I got the City
Planning Commission

in my pocket.

You keep dreaming, Donald.

Hello?

Russell, it's Donald, uh,
can you let me in?

I, I, I need to talk to Roy.

Russell.

Easy, easy.

You're gonna...
- Roy...

You're gonna break my intercom.

Roy, can you let me in?
I, I, I need your help.

Boy, you fucked
the dog, didn't you?

Listen, I, I, I...

Sorry.

I really need your help on this.

Okay, I'll, uh, I'll call
the mayor.

What's my ask?

Waive Hyatt's property taxes.

Waive Hyatt's property taxes?

- Yeah.
- Oh, so...

you, you want, uh...

you want me to ask them for

a $160 million abatement?

Yeah. Well, with you it can
be done.

You're nuts.

With you it can be done.

You're Roy Cohn,
you're Roy Cohn.

The Roy Cohn.

- It's just not gonna happen.
- I mean...

I'll do anything for you.
What-whatever you want.

You know, I can't, uh, turn,

uh, you know, loaves into
fishes here, you know?

I know, but I'm begging you
for this.

I believe in this, Roy, and
I'm...

I'm begging you, please. Just...

just make a call.

Okay, call me in the morning, okay?

- Call me in the morning.
- Roy, I love you.

Be glad he owes me.

I love you!

Okay.

Thank you. Have a good night.

Goodnight.

Ha... have a good night.

Let's just hope
we're not

made fools of in there.

Everyone's on board, Dad,
this is just a formality.

Yeah, right.

Uh, it was only a year ago

that President Ford told
New York City to drop dead.

New York City, drop dead.

Now, my client, Mr Trump,

is trying to give this city
a much needed,

uh, blood infusion and,
uh, resuscitate the corpse

of New York City. And I urge you

to support my client
in doing so.

Thank you.

Thank you, Mr Cohn.

Let's go through the last run of
comments on this issue.

Deputy Mayor Richard Morgan

will provide the mayor's view
of this proposal.

Thank you, Chairman.

I'll keep this brief.

Uh, Mayor Beame,

and the rest of City Hall

fully support Mr Trump's plans.

This is a damn rip off.

The rich don't need another
tax break!

- Order!
- Especially this man.

- Okay, okay... okay.
- Come on, Chairman.

While it is true that there
is support

for Mr Trump's proposal,

it is also true that the city is
being forced to cut

vital services to the poor.

We will move to a vote after
a short recess.

You said they were on board.

Now you're wasting my time.

What did I tell you?

What did I tell you?

What happened, Roy?

You thought, uh, the rules
don't apply to you.

Well, what are we gonna do now?

They're gonna vote any minute.

Watch your head.

It's my playroom.

I can record, uh,
everything and,

you know, keep a record
in case I need it.

This is the patch bay, and,
uh, you run these cables,

uh, to any room in the house,

and, uh, you can listen in.

I got Onassis.

I got Cardinal Cooke.

Oh, I got everybody.

Park your butt here.

The chairman came to
see me one day...

with a little problem.

Michael, uh, can I have a word?
- Yeah.

- Where d'you put the money?
- I put it in a fund

that I thought no-one would
take a look at.

Now they're starting to go
through the books.

How much?

50k.

I-I don't want this thing
coming back to haunt me.

Have you no decency?

Oh, you know,
I've heard that before.

You have to be willing to do
anything to anyone to win.

This has been one of
the toughest votes we've had.

There's a lot of strong feelings
on both sides.

You have to be willing to
exploit your enemies

and instil fear.

Our responsibility is to do
what's best for New York.

The truth is, the city needs
investment.

Therefore, we grant approval
for Mr Trump's tax abatement.

- This is a final decision...
- This is corruption!

You should be ashamed
of yourself!

I will ask you to maintain order
in this house!

Well, that's illegal, right?

Oh, it's illegal?

Donald, wake up.

You know, when I tried
the Rosenbergs,

I wanted so badly

to see those pinko kikes fry

for what they did.

Now, uh, Judge Kaufman
had no trouble

sending Julius to the chair,

but, uh, Ethel was a mother

with young kids.

They wanted her to live.

As if that's some sort of
special immunity

for betraying your country.

So, during the trial,

I'd slip out at lunch
to a phone booth

and, uh, call Kaufman.

You know, technically
ex parte conversations,

they're not allowed, but, uh,
when democracy is at stake,

you're damn right I'm willing to
violate a few technicalities.

I don't care if she's a mother
with young kids.

She betrayed our country
and she has to die.

You have to set an example
and put this woman to death.

She's a traitor.

Do you understand what
I'm telling you?

I mean, America's
the biggest client, right?

That's right.

You have to be willing to do
anything for America.

To safeguard democracy.

Huh?

"Yes, Sir, I Can Boogie"
by Baccara

Is this for me?

♪ But I need a certain song ♪

Make it five here.

♪ Boogie woogie
All night long ♪

♪ Yes, Sir, I can boogie ♪

- Hello?
- Ivana, it's Donald.

- Hi, Donald.
- What's going on?

You wanna go to dinner?

Donald, I like you,

and the flowers are beautiful,

but I cannot do this.

I can't.
- You're hurting my heart.

I can't sleep, I can't eat.

I'm off for a job in Aspen,

and I need to pack.

A job?

Like, are you, like...

Listen, Donald,
I'm getting engaged.

- You're getting engaged?
- And I love my boyfriend.

Well, just...

Alright, so, here's the idea.

We've got like
a rock band going here,

and like she gets
all the attention,

and you guys are great,
you're supporting her, though.

Okay.

Yeah, just... push your
tits towards me.

There you go.

The arrogance, the arrogance.

Sexy. Here we go.

Yeah, okay.

Beautiful.

Come a little bit forward here.

There you go. Okay.

Great job.

You look good.

Donald, what are you doing here?

I heard, uh, Aspen real estate
is hot.

Bullshit.

It's true.

I have a lot of, uh...

unfinished business.

You wanna go to dinner?

I'm gonna make a run
after the shoot,

and... maybe you can join me.

You... you wanna ski?

Do you know how to ski?

Sure.

I'll meet you here.

Meet me at the slopes.

No, no, no, I'll meet you here.

I'll get my skis, then I'll meet
you here.

Do...

do you like modelling?

I like the money.

You make good money on that?

I make decent money,

but what I really want is
my own fashion line.

I want clothes, jewellery,

shoes... with my name.

My biggest dream is to have
my own interior design firm.

I have a whole vision.

What?

Uh, no, you're just not

like, uh, the women
I normally meet.

Because I want something
more than a man

and a ring?

Yeah.

Well, cheers to that.

You're really not gonna
drink anything?

I don't like anything to slow
me down.

Uh...

Okay, I don't mean to laugh.

Well, in life

there are two types of people.

There are killers,

and there are losers.

But it's good not to be
a killer, no?

Killer means winner.

Oh.

So...

Are you a killer, Donald?

Are you going to kill me?

It's called
the Big Apple,

the greatest city in the world.

Now there seems to be
something rotten

in the core of the fruit.

The city can barely afford to

pay its bills, says Ed Koch,

the mayoral candidate.

We don't know yet the sacrifices

we need to make

to get this city back
on its feet again.

And as the crime is surging,

it might even have to lay off

those who fight crime.

But this won't stop young
real estate promotor,

Donald Trump, from pursuing

his dream project:

a 1,500-room luxury hotel

at the Grand Central terminal.

New York right now is at
a great turning point,

it's gonna go one way
or the other,

and I'm gonna make
damn well sure

it goes the right way.

I wanna make it
a fabulous place again.

Oh my God.

It's a 19-year open audit.

So, what they're telling me is

I'm supposed to remember now,

in March 1977,

uh, who I had dinner with

in February 1958,

and, uh, you know,
what colour tie

they were wearing,
and... exactly.

Listen, let me call you back.

The, uh, clowns at the IRS

are crawling up my ass again.

That's terrible.

Uh, Roger, meet Donald Trump.

- Hi. Good to meet you.
- How you doing?

Roger Stone.
Sorry, I'm all wet.

That's, uh, that's alright.

He's all wet.

Huge fan of your work.

- Oh, thank you.
- Yeah.

Roger here is into politics.

His specialty is, uh,
dirty tricks.

Uh, well, no comment.

Roger, uh, be a mensch,

uh, get me a Paloma.

Sure.

So... how's things?

Well, uh, listen, things are...

things are good,
and I, uh, I met someone.

You met someone?

That's great. Good for you.

Well, she's a...
she's a tough cookie.

Well, she better not
mess with you,

because she'll have to
answer to me.

We're gonna get married.

You're gonna get married?

You're gonna get married?

What do you mean?

I love her, Roy.
- Are you nuts?

Are you out of your
goddamn mind?

- Well, I'm in love.
- Donald, let me

put it to you this way.

Would you sign a contract

giving away half your assets?

Roy, a contract?

That's what a marriage is,
it's a contract

between two parties.

My parents have been married
for 40 years, Roy,

and I don't know what...
nobody had a contract.

Listen, the matrimonial game
is a zero-sum game.

Trust me. I almost married
Barbara Walters

and then I wised up.

- Right.
- You're gonna need protection.

It's not the Magna Carta,

it's just a standard prenup.

That's all.

Yeah.

"In the event of separation,

spouse will receive $20,000
annual."

Right.

That's not too bad.

- We're not gonna separate.
- Okay, let me finish.

You just sign it at the end.

Let me finish.

Please, take your time.

- I will, trust me.
- Good.

Return all the gifts?

Is this a joke?

- Does it say that?
- Is what a joke?

Uh, we, we, we don't have to
do that.

Well, legally a gift, uh,

doesn't constitute marital
property,

so, in the case of divorce...
- You agree with that?

...or the dissolution of
a marriage.

- A gift?
- Well...

You don't need to bullshit me
with this legal language.

I can get a two-dollars lawyer
like you as well.

- Ivana, you can keep the gifts.
- I, I don't need that.

Well, we don't have to...
just keep the gifts.

- Forget it.
- It's fine.

- Oh my God...
- Uh... buyer beware.

Ivana, hey...

Ivana!

Look, forget the gift clause, alright?

Roy got carried away.

Listen, I'll give you,
uh, 50,000 now,

like a signing bonus, alright?
Come on.

The wedding is in two days.

$100,000 in my account
before the wedding.

75.

100,000 or I go.

Ivana, please.

Let's talk about this.

Come on, don't do this.

Go find someone else, Donald.
I'm not a trophy wife.

You're gonna ruin your life
if you don't marry me.

Come on.

- One second. Listen, I'm...
- Why is that?

Because I'm rich, I'm handsome,

I have a great family...
- Oh my God, oh my God.

I'm going to be in the
number-one building in New York.

Listen to me.

You're gonna have a life
you can't even dream of, Ivana,

with me.

I love you.

I love you, okay?

I wanna have children with you,

I want us to grow old together.

Better.

Hey!

Congratulations!

Fuck you!

Thank you very much for coming.

Thank you.

Uh, here.

Cheers.

She thinks she's gonna put me

in the movies now.

She thinks I look like
Robert Redford.

Thank you, thanks for coming.

Your building is almost as
beautiful as your wife.

Well, almost.

And it's gonna get even
more beautiful.

You two must have
a lot of money.

Here they are.

- Oh. There he is.
- Ah, the two lovebirds.

You look, uh, you look
marvellous.

Hey there.

- Excuse me.
- See you in a second.

I don't think somebody's over
the prenup.

- Oh, she'll come around.
- I don't think so,

but, uh, that's alright.

Means I'm doing my job.

Somebody's gotta protect you.

Exactly.

Look at this.
I mean, you got everybody.

You got the mayor,

uh, city council president,

all the major developers here.

Everybody's lining up to kiss
your ring now, kiddo.

You've arrived... you know that?

Thank you, Roy.

I love you.

You're practically my family.

Oh, thank you for saying that.

I hope we're not tired yet,

we're just getting started,
you know.

Drink up, everybody.

Hey, good to see you.

Good to see you.
It's been a long time.

- Roy.
- How are you?

- I'm good, how are you?
- Uh, good.

Very nice to see you.

Uh, you should be very proud of
your son.

I'm extremely proud.

Extremely proud.

You know, Roy,
I've been meaning to tell you,

I, I, I... I wanted to thank you

for all you've done for Donald.
I appreciate it.

Well, I haven't done anything.

Uh, he doesn't need my help.

Oh.

Little Donnie needs
all the help he can get.

We had to ship him off to
military school

when the teachers found his
switchblade collection.

Yeah, well, uh, you know,

I saw West Side Story

and it was a great movie,
West Side Story.

You know what, Fred?
Uh, I just fixed

what others couldn't.

Well, I appreciate it, Roy.

Thank you for doing that.

I really do.

- Thanks for coming, Roy.
- See you in a second, Roy.

Appreciate it.

Uh...
- He's an asshole.

Well, no, he's got a client
he's, uh... he's dealing with.

Um, how's it going, Dad?
- No, it didn't seem right.

It's... it's going fine,
it's great.

I don't know any of
these people.

Like, who's that guy?

Well, uh, these are, uh,
these are very important people.

I wrote a few things down in
case you wanted...

I should do a... a speech,
you know, a...

toast or whatever.

We're okay, Freddy, don't worry.

Don't worry about a speech.
- Nah.

What, uh, what happened
with, uh, TWA?

I don't like to fly anymore.

Well, that's great, Freddy.

Alright, well, look, I, uh,
I gotta go see Ivana, so, um...

Hey, tell her, uh,
tell her gratulujeme.

That's 'congratulations'
in Czech.

- Okay, I will, I will.
- I looked it up

in case you wanted me
to do a speech.

Gratulujeme, everybody.

- Oh, shit. Oh, shit.
- Freddy...

- Hold on, it's on your suit.
- Can you just, uh...

Leave it. Put it down.

- Sorry.
- Sit down. Sit down.

You gave me a wet glass.

You're looking at me
like it's my fault.

You gave me a wet glass!
- Have a seat.

Oh shit, you're mad with me now.

I ruined everything,
now you're mad with me.

I'm not mad.
Listen to me, I'm not mad.

- I'm sorry, Donnie.
- I'm not fucking mad.

Listen to me.

It's my fucking night,
it's my fucking night.

Can't you fucking keep it
together, for once?

Stop pissing your fucking life
down the river.

You were supposed to be
at my dinner.

You were supposed to be
at my dinner,

you're my older brother.

Stand up.

Don't be such a fucking bum.

- Ready?
- Ready.

I got it!

I got it!

Five, four, three, two, one.

Happy New Year!

Every major tax cut
in this century

has strengthened the economy

by creating new investment,
new jobs,

and more commerce
among our people.

It's time to put America
back to work.

♪...to treat me like you do ♪

♪ When you've laid your hands
upon me ♪

Listen, don't sell Koch
too hard.

I know how to handle him, thanks.

Oh, you know how to
handle him, do you?

Listen, this is gonna be
a cinch.

Just, uh, let me handle it.

I really think this is gonna be
one of the most

exceptional buildings
anywhere in the world, and,

frankly, there's never
been anything like it.

68 storeys tall, 28 sides,
a million square feet,

every unit will have amenities
like you wouldn't believe,

and the higher floors have
exceptional views

over Central Park.
- Huh.

The lobby, the floors will
all be marble.

Pink Paradiso marble from Italy.

It'll have the largest,
uh, atrium in the world,

a 60-foot waterfall spanned
by shops

and retail and restaurants,

and I think it's gonna be
something very special.

Frankly, there's never been
anything like it.

And what are you gonna call it?

- Trump Tower.
- Trump Tower?

Oh, that's interesting.

Look, he has a great
track record,

so, we think this is a very
reasonable ask.

Well, I... I... as I frequently
say about his buildings,

the merit's a fine thing,
it's just we're not

gonna give you the tax breaks.
Why would we?

I, I mean, I can't let you
get rich

on the backs of the people of
New York and their treasury.

I can't do that, Donald.
- Well, Mr Mayor, I mean...

- first of all...
- Look, Mr Mayor, my client...

Well, you're not,
you're not, Mr Mayor,

because I'm building
a 68-storey building

that's gonna employ 5,000
construction workers.

And we have heard stories
about the construction workers

working on your projects.

They don't get paid. They have
liens against you, Donald.

I'm trying to employ people
in New York

and turn us back around,
towards the future.

And you're being a very
unfair guy,

'cause frankly, what do you
know about me?

What do you know about
the amount

of money that I made on my own?

You don't know anything,
to be perfectly honest,

Mr Mayor.
You don't know me at all.

But you will. You'll never
forget me after this,

'cause I won't forget what
you just did.

Trump Tower will be built
with or without you!

- Okay.
- You're about to be sued,

Mr Mayor.

Hm.

I think we should attend
the Park Gala next month.

Tables are $10,000

and we get to the house
committee.

Why would I give money
to those snobs?

It's gonna make the park
more beautiful.

It's ridiculous, okay?
Trees don't need money to grow.

The city really should let
developers build over the park,

'cause it's prime real estate.

And stop trying to be friends
with these Park Avenue phonies.

They don't care about you.

I mean, the way you're posing
for the cameras,

it's like you're, you're begging
for attention.

Donald, I'm posing because they
want to shoot me.

- Oh, really?
- Don't get jealous.

- Don't get jealous.
- I'm not jealous, okay?

If anybody's jealous,
they're jealous of me.

You are getting jealous.
You're getting a little jealous.

No, no, no. They're jealous
of me, Ivana,

because nobody's tried...
- Because you're with me.

on any scale of what I'm trying
to do in the city.

- Because you're with me.
- No-one's built what I've built

at my age, alright?

I cannot sit.

It's just, it's Koch, okay?
He's being a piece of work,

and that's the problem.
He's not gonna budge, alright?

Here, let me help you
with the shoes.

He just wants a bit more money.
That's it.

Ivana, I gave him $50,000.

- What does Roy say?
- Roy's useless!

What do you mean, what he said?
By the way, the FBI

raided his house this morning.

He owes them $7 million
in taxes.

But it doesn't matter, I don't
need Roy, I don't need anybody.

I'm gonna go on television
and tell the people

what a loser Koch is, okay,
and that he's a one-line artist

that doesn't care about anything
other than looking good.

What's the matter with him?

What's the matter with him?
Why are you crying?

Don Jr, come here. Come here.

Come here. Come here,
look at me...

- Hey bubba.
- Look at me, look at me.

Look at me, look at me. You see?

Everything's okay.
Don Jr, everything's okay.

Look over there. You see New
York City? That's your city.

Listen, you're a New
York City kid.

Do you see right there... yes?

That one, that one,
is that one your favourite?

Which one's your favourite?

I think he's just tired.

Donald...

It's okay.

I guess I'm terrible
with babies.

I dunno what you want me to say.

Who is that?

- My name's Freddy...
- Freddy!

Hey, will you tell
this guy who I am?

- He knows.
- I'm his brother.

When, uh, when, when did you get
into town?

Uh, just a couple days ago.

I've been calling you,
but you didn't return my calls.

- Mm. You don't look too good.
- Yeah.

- Are you sick?
- I brought this for Don Jr.

Maybe I can go give it to him.
- Uh, that's okay, that's okay.

Listen, I'll, I'll give it
to him, alright?

I'll give it to him.

What's going on?
I didn't know you were in town.

Look, Donnie, I know,
I know, uh,

you know, I know I'm a loser
and, uh, all that, but, uh,

you know, my, my grip's,
kind of, uh,

kind of slipping a little bit,
you know?

And, uh, it's, it's getting
kind of, uh, you know,

things are getting a little bit,
uh, scary, and uh...

- Hm.
- I... you know, I wanna, I wanna,

I wanna change and...
- Mm-hm.

Just, just take it easy, okay?
It's gonna be alright.

We're gonna figure this out.
I'll, I'll help you, alright?

- Yeah.
- Okay? Alright.

It's alright, buddy.
We're gonna figure this out.

- Alright? Don't worry.
- Freddy, how are you?

- Wow, you... Ivana, hi.
- He got a toy for...

I didn't know you were
in the city.

- Should I make up the guestroom?
- Yeah.

Um, well, I mean, you know,
we also have, uh,

didn't you say your family's
coming to town, right?

You know, why don't you stay
at a hotel tonight?

Here, get, get a hotel
for, for, for tonight,

and then, uh,
let's talk tomorrow.

You know, we'll, we'll sort
something out, alright?

Just, just for tonight, alright?

Come on, Freddy, don't put
this on me, alright?

I mean, you think it's easy for
me to watch you waste your life?

Poor Freddy.

Donald Trump's
biggest accomplishment to date

is the Grand Hyatt.

Now an even more ambitious plan
is in the works,

a bold new skyscraper,
a prime Fifth Avenue location,

neighbouring the famous
Tiffany's store.

Taller? Well,
it could've been taller.

It could've been
a lot taller, actually.

I wanted to build taller
than the Twin Towers.

I may still do that,
I don't know.

- We're still building, so...
- We were gonna do taller,

but it's not gonna be
as beautiful as this one.

It's most important what
is inside

than what was gonna be outside.

Trump's vision is shared
by his wife, Ivana,

a former fashion model
turned interior designer.

Like, come over here.

The floor, the floor is gonna
be pink marble.

Gonna be pink marble,
I'm gonna bring

a whole mountain from Italy.

Ivana's gonna design the floors,
I'm gonna design the ceilings.

But it's his feud
with outspoken Mayor Ed Koch

that may make him best known
to New Yorkers.

Well, he's a one-line artist,
uh, I, I mean, you know,

uh, when it
comes to running the city,

he's about as bad
as anybody I've seen.

I would say he's got no talent
and only moderate intelligence.

Is this an appropriate way to
talk about an elected official?

Ed Koch has been a disaster
for New York and, uh,

he's done a lousy job
as the mayor.

Anybody that lives in New York
knows it.

And people understand that
in order to be successful

you have to have
a certain instinct to win.

Donald, you're a mover,
you are a doer.

If you could make America
perfect, how would you do it?

Well, I think that America's
a country that has tremendous,

tremendous potential. I think
that much like the mind,

I think America's using very,
very little of its potential.

I really feel that. But I also
feel that it's a country

that gets no respect
from other countries.

None. Zero.

And uh, and that's a shame,
isn't it?

Tell me this, what if you lost
your fortune today?

What would you do?
- Well, then maybe I'll run

for president, I don't know.
- Well, you'd do very well.

Well, I'm only kidding obviously
when I say that,

I'm just being facetious, but...
- No, it's a good answer.

Listen, you're gonna love
Atlantic City.

I got this guy Sullivan,
uh, he's a killer.

Simon! Find a way
through, alright?

We gotta get to the heliport.

Oh, it's that gay cancer.

He just wiped his face all over
the fucking glass.

Get out of my face.

Run 'em over, Simon.

Come on, Simon!

I'm kidding.

Atlantic City
is just beginning.

It's virtually untouched land.

There's so much potential.

Atlantic City has peaked,
Donald.

Once other states
legalise gaming,

you'll have competition
lining up,

plus you don't know the first
thing about running a casino.

I know a lot about running
a casino, Roy.

I'm not worried about that.

Why don't you finish
Trump Tower first?

Done. Basically finished.

I think your balls
are swelling a little too much.

It's gonna be fine, Roy.

You gotta... you gotta think
about the future.

The future's coming.
The future's here right now.

- I am think...
- The future is in Atlantic City.

I see now, this is what
a goldmine looks like.

In human flesh.
- Unbelievable.

Unbelievable, huh?

People see what
you're building...

He's excited.

You know how excited he is?

Yeah. That's his excited face!

Woo! Hey, did you win?

Did you win?
You look like a winner.

- Where are you from?
- Georgia.

Georgia's my favourite.

- There she is.
- How many machines?

67 machines.

Well, we're gonna put in

3,000, alright?

And then we'll pack every
grandma in the world

in this place.

We're gonna suck this place dry.
- Yeah!

Applying for a gaming licence
is gonna take, uh,

eight, ten months minimum.
- Not if you're this guy.

See, they're always losing.

They're always losing
back there.

Look, this, this uh,

this place
is about as much Las Vegas

- as my Aunt Libby is Grace Kelly.
- Fantastic is what it is.

It's gonna better
than Las Vegas.

It's totally cheap and grubby

and it's gonna be bad
for your brand.

Roy, you know, you're being so
negative all the...

What is this? Is this free food?
Wow.

Uh, I might have to
get in there.

Cheese balls over here.

Hoo-hoo, they look nice and hot.

- What are you doing?
- You want one?

No, it looks totally disgusting.

Cheese balls.

Listen, what do you think
about midget boxing?

I think people will love it.

I don't think very much
about midget boxing, Donald.

When I do Trump Tower,
people love it.

Everything I do is turning
to gold, alright?

Everything's gonna work out.
It's fine.

But this is, this is not
a goldmine.

You're expanding too fast, okay?
- Oh, here we go.

You're gonna be overleveraged
and you're gonna have debt, uh,

up to your ears
and I don't advise it.

I know what I'm doing, okay?

You've been negative the whole
day. I mean, what's going on?

Well, I'm getting a little tired

of you not listening
to me anymore.

I do listen to you.
Just act a little bit more

like my attorney
and less like my dad,

'cause I already got one,
he's a pain in the ass.

Fine. You know, uh, you know
what lawyers do, Donald?

They charge their clients.

Okay.

Send me the bill.

That make you feel better?

Good, fine.
I'll send you a bill.

Great.

I can pay you, 'cause I have
money, 'cause I'm successful.

- Right.
- Alright?

- I'm sorry. Mr Trump?
- And, uh, who, who, who, uh...

Listen, I'm worried about you.

You're stressed,
you're sensitive.

I mean, what's going on?

Telephone for you.

Yes.

Mom.

What's going on?

What?

When?

He maketh me lie down
in the green pastures,

he leadeth me beside
the still waters.

He restoreth my soul.

He leadeth me in the path
of righteousness

for his name's sake.

Though I walk through the valley
of the shadow of death,

I will fear no evil,

for thou art with me.

Thy rod, thy staff,
they comfort me.

Preparest a table before me...

And I will dwell in the house
of the Lord forever.

Amen.

What?

I'm fine, Ivana.

You don't need to be fine.

Okay.

Look at me.
Do you like what you see?

Good, because it's not me,
it's a recording of me...

Hey...

- I'm fine, I'm fine.
- You don't need to be fine.

I'm fine. Stop! Don't!

Don't fucking...
Don't fucking come near me!

It's gonna be okay, Donald.

Donald...

Please stop looking at me,
and stop touching me.

"Always On My Mind" by
Pet Shop Boys

Hello. Thank you.

Mr Trump, how does it feel
to be the golden boy

of New York City?

Fantastic. I feel great.

Just fantastic. Thank you.

Is it glamorous
or is it glamorous?

- I think it's glamorous.
- What is it?

When you're willing to spend
the kind of money

that I've spent...

Are you gonna perform tonight?
Great.

Smile.

A lot of people said Trump Tower
could not be done,

and uh, in fact our loser mayor
tried everything

to deny the city this great
building, and he's lost.

He's simply lost.

We've got the best people
buying in;

Carson, Spielberg,
Prince Charles and Diana.

Everybody wants a piece
of Trump.

Fantastic, fantastic.
Oh, I think I see Mr Cohn!

- Oh, alright.
- How are you, Randy?

- Very well.
- Here he is.

- How you doing tonight?
- I'm good, I'm very excited.

It's, uh, very exciting.

Call you.

I've never met anyone
who reminds me more of myself.

Donald, he's got grit,
he is, uh,

relentless in the pursuit
of perfection.

Look at this, it's a masterpiece

uh, marble waterfalls...

Listen, I could've built it
taller than the Twin Towers,

if I wanted.
- Gentlemen, enjoy your night.

It's good
to see you, Randy.

Donald, could, could I talk
to you for a minute?

- Yeah, sure. How are you?
- I've been trying to call you.

You look like shit.
Can I get an iced water?

No. I know it's a bad time,
I just...

What's going on? Are you tired?

I'm just, uh, overworked,
is all.

Alright. Well, maybe you should
try these.

What are those?

Diet pills.
I got 'em from my doctor.

They're amazing for everything.

Energy, sleep.
I don't need to sleep anymore.

Are you, you sure
that's a good thing?

Well, I can't do deals
when I sleep,

so yeah, that's a good thing.

Listen, uh, I just, uh, I need
to ask you a little favour.

- Sure.
- I was wondering if you might

be able to put Russell up
at the Hyatt?

Why?

The country house is...
it's too cold for him.

Uh, he has pneumonia.

Get him a blanket.

Russell's a good kid and he's,
he's very loyal, uh,

and it'd mean a lot to me.

Listen, he never helped me,
but I'll do it for you,

no problem, alright?

Come over here for a second.

- What?
- Do you think she looks good?

Oh sure. She looks
like a real beauty queen.

I mean, every night she comes
home telling me what to do.

I feel like I'm married
to a business partner.

I don't, I don't feel anything.
I look at her and it's, like...

Whatever.

At least I got her
to do her tits.

Oh yeah?

They're amazing.

Ah, Akio-san!

- Hey, how are you?
- There you are.

Listen, uh, I want,
I want you to see this, uh...

What is it with Roy?
He always looks sick.

No, he's fine.

Wonderful to see you.

Oh no, no...

- How are you, huh?
- Wonderful.

- What do you think?
- I love this lobby.

- I planned it myself.
- Oh...

Well, I let her do all
the easy stuff.

- So, tell me, how do you like?
- Oh, I love it.

- How we doing, Dad?
- Oh, hey.

- How's the view?
- It's alright.

I wonder what the electric bill
is for that?

That, that seems impractical.

Don't worry about that, Dad.

You know what this reminds
me of?

When I built, uh, Trump Tower
on Coney Island.

Trump Village.

You built Trump Village,
I built Trump Tower.

- Right.
- This is Trump Tower.

Right. That's what I meant.

But when I, when I built that
high rise in, uh,

in Trump Village, uh,

boats could see it
20 miles out to sea.

This is very different
than that, Dad, okay?

This is... this is
the big league.

- The big time.
- Oh, well.

You know, um...

I've been meaning to say,
you know, uh...

I know that I've been tough
on you, right?

But look at you now, huh?

You're a killer. A king.

Right?

Right?

Mm.

Mm.

Try some caviar.

It's the best.

You're gorgeous.

Hey.

I got you a gift.

The G-spot.

The G-spot.

"Experiment with your G-spot
as you may have done

with your clitoris,
and if and when you learn

to masturbate that way..."
Oh, that's... great.

That's, uh, great.

- Wanna go upstairs?
- Listen, uh...

I gotta tell you, I'm, uh...

What? Tell me.

I'm just not attracted
to you anymore.

Donald...

Really, I mean,
every time I, uh,

kiss you I feel like, you know,

it's my duty or something.

I mean, it's, uh...
- Donald...

And I'm touching you,
I'm touching

those fake plastic tits.
I mean, I feel weird.

They were your idea.

You made me do it.

Well, maybe they were a mistake.

Donald. Donald...

Can you tell me
what is happening?

You are behaving like an animal
and you're hurting me.

- Why are you doing this?
- Ivana, I, I...

You don't care how
it makes me feel?

Ivana, I'm just trying
to be honest.

I'm, I'm... really,
I'm telling you...

Oh my God. I don't know
what's happening.

Is it because of the stupid
pills that you're taking?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I think what's happening is

you're getting a bit
of a bigger head

because you're forgetting
your story.

- You came over here to...
- My story?

from Eastern Czechoslo-fucking-
vakia or whatever the fuck it is

and you married me.
- And where did you come, Donnie?

Where did you come from, hm?
Queens.

Have you looked at yourself
in the mirror, huh? Have you?

- I have. What's your point?
- Your face look like an orange.

- Okay, okay.
- And you're getting fat.

- Right.
- You're getting ugly!

You're a rude and terrible,
terrible person.

You're getting bald!
You're disgusting!

Bald?! I'm not fucking bald!

Uh!

Oh, fuck!

Donald!

Fuck!

Donald!

Am I fucking on that G-spot?
Huh?

Is that your G-spot? Huh?

Did I find it?
Did I fucking find it? Huh?

How does that feel?
Does that feel good?

Huh?

Yeah...

Two new casinos
in Atlantic City

in just two years.

Donald Trump has been on
an impressive shopping spree.

There seem to be no limits
to the expansion of his empire.

Japan? It's the best.

A lot of money,
a lot of money in Japan, huh?

From the sea to the sky,

some say the age of Trump
has begun.

Trump Tower, Trump City,
Trump Plaza, Trump Castle.

- Does ego come into it?
- It sells, Mike, it sells.

It has nothing to do
with the ego, it sells.

Here he comes, folks.
DJT!

Wow, so many people here.
I can't believe it.

- How's it going, Dan?
- Ah...

It's all thanks to my wife.
She's a hell of a manager.

She even cleans
the floors herself.

He's so funny.

We've got record numbers, alright?

We'll talk.
You're gonna be very happy.

Very happy.

♪ Fantasy boy ♪

♪ Please be my lover
Not my toy ♪

♪ Cause I need you to be real ♪

♪ To be no fantasy ♪

♪ I want to touch and feel ♪

♪ My fantasy boy ♪

- Fuck!
- Mm. What's going on?

Stop for a second,
stop for a second.

Forget it.

Nothing, nothing.

Nothing, I'm just, uh...

I'm so overwhelmed, you know.
I've got a lot going on,

you know, these people are
crawling up my ass down there.

We got these coin machines.
they're supposed to wait

eight hours, they've gotta
replace 'em in two hours.

There's never been people
that are playing that fast

and that hard.

Like I told you, fellas,
we're gonna be number one.

Number one, nobody competes
with it.

Donald, we need to talk
about the figures...

And by the way,
here's the difference.

We're talking about
Atlantic City,

not Las Vegas. Great job.
- Donald...

Wait, what do we have
in Atlantic City?

We've got the ocean!

We've got the ocean right here, fellas.

We're gonna also make
this the boxing mecca.

I was talking to Don King
about bringing Mike Tyson

and various, uh, situations
over here

because that's gonna be a lot
of money, you know what I mean?

I think like a prize fighter.
I don't like to tell people

where I wanna go,
what I wanna do.

I wanna just roll with the
punches, you know what I mean?

And I think that's gonna be good
for Atlantic City.

That's great, but we've been
hearing the exact same thing

since you nearly defaulted on
your loan payment last quarter.

Yeah, but there's never been
anything like this

of this magnitude, this quality.

The Taj Mahal's gonna be
the eighth wonder of the...

Alright, you listen to me,
you son of a bitch.

If you don't make
a goddamn payment

by the end of this month,

my bankruptcy attorneys
are gonna be up your ass.

My credit is good,
my credit is solid

and you fellas have nothing
to worry about.

Last warning, Donald.

I've got people to answer to.

Do you gamble, Roger?

You like to gamble, huh?
Play a little slot machine?

I like to make money,
not lose it.

Well, let me tell you something.
There's gonna be

a lot of grandmothers
in Atlantic City

that are gonna be very happy
with that.

- Oh yeah.
- Okay?

- The budget, $1 billion.
- Wow!

- Yeah, you gotta come stay.
- Very Eastern flair, huh?

- This is something.
- Well, it is, it is.

Yes?

I've got Roy on the phone.

Uh, tell him I'll call him back.

Listen, Reagan's making
this country so fucking rich,

you can't lose!
- Well...

I'm telling you, Donald!

Yeah, he stands for all
the things you care about.

Lower taxes,
cutting regulations.

- A powerful military...
- Well, I, I like that.

- Like it used to be. Right?
- Yes, we need that.

- We do.
- We need that.

Hey, in fact, we have a brand
new campaign slogan.

Listen to this.

"Let's make America
great again."

Wow.

Hm.

Well, I like the 'again' part.

You know, it points
to a great past.

It does. Not many people
see that.

Well, I do, okay?
'Cause I love this country,

and I'm tired of seeing
this country getting ripped off

like you wouldn't believe.

It's losing $200 billion
a year, Roger.

$200 billion.
Does Reagan know that?

'Cause all these, these oil
sheikhs, and the Japs,

and the welfare queens,
and the union thugs,

they're sucking us dry.
- You're right.

It's time to get smart and it's
time to get tough,

because otherwise there's not
gonna be a country

and there's not gonna be
a world.

- And you know who's tough?
- You.

The Soviets. They get it,
believe me.

You're talking about tough
and strong

Listen, you want me to read,
you know,

about the missiles, it's gonna
take me an hour and a half.

I probably know most
of that anyway, so...

Donald, I'm telling you, I,
I love how passionate you are.

Have you thought about
running for office?

Well, look,
I'd run very well, right?

I mean, but uh, no, no.

- No?
- Come on, Roger,

let me tell you something.
Government is for losers.

- Come on, you'd do great!
- Hey...

I know politicians, Roger, okay?

I know politicians better than
anyone, and some of them

are smart, very few, but most
are dumber than a rock.

Let's be honest, okay?

I give money to politicians
so they do what I want.

They're all very corrupt
and stupid, okay?

And you know that, Rog.
But you know what?

I'd love a blow job
on Air Force One.

I think that'd be
pretty fabulous, alright.

Hey, I'm sure
it's happened before.

- Can you make that happen? Huh?
- Yeah, well, hey, hey,

call me if you change
your mind, okay?

Well, listen, you get me on
that Air Force One, we'll talk.

- Okay.
- Alright.

Tell Ronnie he's got my support.

- You got it.
- Hang on one second. Yes?

- Uh, Roy's on the phone again.
- I'll call him later.

- Yeah.
- Anyway...

Hey, uh, Donald, before I go,
have you, uh,

have you seen Roy lately?
- Uh...

No, I'm gonna call him back and,
uh, we're gonna talk. Why?

You haven't heard?

Heard what?

Well, uh, Russell has AIDS.

- He's sick as a dog.
- Mm.

That's, uh... wow,
that's terrible.

Hey, he still your lawyer?

Well, he's not my lawyer per se.

I mean, I have a number
of attorneys, right?

Different lawyers,
different things.

- Mm.
- But, um...

- That's really terrible, Roger.
- Yeah, yeah.

Well, the world's a mess.

- Goodbye Donald.
- Yep.

Fiona?

Come over here.

Uh...

what did Roy say?

Not too much, but he's called
three times.

Does he sound sick?

Little bit, yeah.
He's got a cough.

Alright, if he calls again,
just tell him

I'm out of the office, alright?
And if he shows up,

put him in the conference room
by himself, okay?

- Will that be all?
- That's it, thank you.

- Hey, thank you very much.
- Donald!

Roy!

Long time no see.

Is this some kind
of a goddamn joke?

What is that?

This? This is how you thank me?

The manager at the Hyatt
kicked Russell out.

Alright, that's probably
a mistake.

Oh, fuck you, Donald!

Fuck you!

Uh, your office
sent me the bill.

- It's a mistake.
- Don't you try me.

Remember who taught you
this stuff.

I'll call 'em, alright?
I'll just, uh, I'll fix it.

You ungrateful fucking
cock-sucking nobody!

- Roy...
- I made you.

Don't you forget that.
I made you.

I'm pretty sure
I made myself, okay.

- Uh, no. You were a loser then,
- Hey, listen, listen...

- and you're still a loser!
- Okay, Roy, listen,

I'm running a business
here, okay?

Guests complained about
Russell's condition,

which you lied about,
by the way, alright?

So that's what happened.

It's not my fault.

What are you, what are you
trying to say?

I hear he's sick. Really sick.

Yeah, he's got pneumonia.

- He's got pneumonia?
- That's right.

Is that the name for it
now on the street?

Watch out. Maybe you'll get it.

You know, you don't want that.

What, are you scared of me?

No, just...

- Little cold out, you know.
- Huh.

Good to see that you have, uh,

lost the last traces of, uh,
decency you once had.

Well, I learned from the best,
Roy, what can I say?

I love you too.

You've got some feelings
now suddenly?

You're the fucking devil!

I don't recognise you anymore, okay?

You're the fucking devil!
Get the fuck out of here!

- You scare me.
- You fucking old man!

You're no saint.

You're not God.

Why don't you go save him?

Save him over there.

Don't get sick, Roy!

- Dad! There's the big man.
- Oh!

- Look at this guy, huh?
- Ah, hey, how are you?

- He looks great.
- Look at this guy!

You look good, Dad.
You look great.

- Ah, good.
- This is Erwin.

This man's got 195 IQ, alright?

The best. Erwin, where'd you
go to school?

- Columbia.
- Oh boy.

- He's a New Yorker!
- You're a smarty pants, huh?

- He's my new Roy Cohn.
- Oh.

Alright. Go ahead.
And listen, Dad,

I bought some land under
the Empire State Building.

- Oh boy.
- Erwin, you love the Empire

State Building, right?
- The best building.

How many units can you put
in there?

Don't worry about it.
Listen, take a look at that.

Erwin's got a couple of things
to say.

- Okay.
- Yeah, Mr Trump, my office

had a request
relating to the trust.

This will allow us to avail
ourselves of some

new tax breaks and reduce
the overall, uh,

taxation on the trust.
- Okay, the trust.

So, with your signature here,
we'll be putting Donald in

as the trustee for the trust.
And that will allow you

to not have to worry yourself.
- Save you a lot of taxes, Dad.

- Okay.
- Absolutely.

- For the trust.
- That's right.

- And you want me to sign here?
- Yes I do.

- Oh really?
- Mom, what are you doing?

We don't have time.
I gotta get back into the city.

Listen Mom, we don't have time.
Dad, go ahead.

- Is that the tea?
- Please sign right there.

- This is for the...
- Donald, what is this?

- This is for the trust, Mary.
- Oh. Well, let me take a look.

- For the, um...
- It's just a formality.

- But who are you?
- This is, this is my attorney.

- This is your siblings' trust.
- I understand, but listen...

You're jeopardising your,
your siblings' trust.

No, I'm not jeopardising
anything.

I have some loans, they need
to be guaranteed.

I gotta just get these Taiwan
bankers off my back.

- What...
- Okay?

I just need to show the bankers
that I'm good.

Your father
is a little confused.

He's not the right person
to be signing this document.

That's why we should have,

as you should know
as a lawyer...

- Mom.
- Sound mind deciding...

Who's gonna look after
this family, okay?

Who's gonna look after
this family when he,

when he can't fucking spell
his name?

- Language! Donald...
- Let's go Erwin, come on.

- Mom, you don't understand.
- What is the rush?

I'm looking out
for the family, alright?

- Language, Donald.
- I'm looking out for the family.

I'm pretty much sure that nobody
else is doing that.

Not Elizabeth, not Mary,
not fucking Freddy...

No! You do not speak his name!

You have no right!

It's time for you to go.

Okay, you need to stop
consuming these immediately.

I thought they were
like vitamins.

It's amphetamines.
It's cheap speed.

Erectile dysfunction's one
of the many side-effects.

I don't have that problem,
but, you know, I eat.

I mean, we all like to eat,
doc, right?

- Mm-hmm.
- You know, did you see this?

Are you seeing this?
It keeps growing.

Everything is growing, and I'm
not talking about my hair.

Well, have you tried exercise?

- No, no, absolutely not.
- Why not?

You know that's gonna kill you,
right, doc?

First of all, the body
is like a battery.

It has finite energy,
it runs out.

- Okay. That's not true.
- That is totally the truth.

- Totally the truth.
- Okay. Donald...

And the problem that
I'm having is, I'm just...

I, I need to stop growing,
that's all.

Okay. We have surgical options.

- That sounds great.
- Okay, yeah.

So, with an incision
here, here and here...

we're gonna get rid of the, uh,
the ab fat

and we're gonna get
the love handles gone too.

Oh, I hate the love handles.

What about my hair?

Okay, you've got some male
pattern baldness. Um...

- And that's normal, right?
- It is, absolutely, okay?

But it doesn't have to be,

you know?
- Okay.

You'll talk to our

in-house specialist.

About a scalp reduction?

We''re gonna cover
that up easily.

- Okay.
- Okay?

Getting old sucks.
Do you know what I mean?

- Yes.
- Do you ever feel that way?

Well, a lot of my patients do.

One more question.

What do you think about AIDS?

- What do...
- What do you think about AIDS?

- What do I think about it?
- Yeah. How do people get it?

'Cause it's not just
homosexuals, doc.

- Right.
- You know?

The research indicates
HIV, uh, spreads

through the exchange of blood
or semen.

- Semen, yeah.
- Yes.

Well, and what if they
touch you?

What if somebody touches you...
- That's okay.

- Or if they breathe on you?
- They can,

they can breathe on you.

That's okay.

Okay.

The legal establishment
in the state of New York

wants to take away Roy Cohn's
licence to practice law.

They say he's dishonest.
They want to disbar him

for allegedly playing fast
and loose with clients' money.

How are you, Roy?

I'm terrific, uh, Mike.
It''s great to see you.

This is what
the disciplinary committee

of the bar says about you.

A total lack of moral character
and professional fitness,

and a cruel public use
of your illness.

That's a pack of lies, because
I've never used my illness, uh,

to plead for anything.

I've called them a bunch
of yoyos, and, uh,

that's what they are, Mike.
They're a bunch of yoyos.

Mm-hmm. When I tell friends
that I'm going to

do a profile on you,

the question on everyone's
mind is that,

and I'm sure you know
what I'm going to say,

do you have AIDS?

Oh. No. I mean, that's easy.

I have liver cancer, uh,
which, uh,

they found moves
in strange directions,

uh, but that...

categorically I do not
have AIDS.

I'm sure you know why people ask
about AIDS, Roy Cohn,

because they believe
you're a homosexual.

Well, uh, that's a lie.

Every facet of my personality,
my, uh,

aggressiveness, my toughness,
and, uh,

everything along those lines,
is just

totally, uh, incompatible...

Hello, it's Roy.

Roy, it's Donald. How are you?

Donald.

How are you?

I'm great, how are you?

Listen, I, I watched,
uh, Mike Wallace.

Right. Well, how'd I do?

You owned it.

Did I look, uh,

did I look weak?

Well, listen,

he's an asshole, you know?

Frankly, he asked
nasty questions.

How's Russell?

Oh, uh, Russell died.

I'm sorry, Roy. I didn't know.

You're not sounding very good.

New York is a mess.
I mean, these bankers, uh,

they got no feel

for the deal, and, uh,

everyone's crawling up my ass
about the debt.

Don't even get me started about
Ivana. I mean, she's a bitch.

So, you thought, uh...

give old Roy a call and ask
for some free legal advice?

I mean, is there anyone better?
Come on.

I miss you, Roy.

You're the only guy that cared.

You're the only guy
that gave a shit

about me.

Listen, I have this property
in Florida,

you're gonna love it.
I think you should come down.

- Yeah?
- Let's get you to the ocean.

How do you feel, though?
You feel alright, no?

Oh, sure, I, I feel
like a million bucks.

'Cause you don't look that bad.

You know, if I have my way,
I'll be as thin as you.

I'm gonna do this procedure.

You know, they, they suck
the fat from under your skin.

And also, don't tell anybody,
but...

Might get 'em to remove
my bald patch.

You, uh, you look like the fella
from, uh, Miami Vice.

Who dressed you,
for crying out loud?

It's this broad
I'm banging, Carly.

She has, uh...
great big natural tits.

Wanna see? Look at that.
Look at that.

She's a ten.

Okay.

It was built to be the winter
White House.

Wow.

These walls are all
silk tapestries,

and, uh, the ceiling
is all gold.

It's pretty impressive.

And they wanted a condo,
can you believe that?

What, uh, what happened
to your leg?

I didn't pay 'em on time,
that's what happened.

Ivana wants to turn
this into Camelot.

I mean, that's what she said.
I was like,

"Please don't, please don't
compare us to the Kennedys."

Oh...

I got you a little, uh,

a little birthday gift.

For me?

It's your birthday.

Oh, you didn't have
to do that, Donald.

Come on. 59, but who's counting?

Huh?

Tiffany diamonds and, uh,
look what it says.

Trump.

What do you think? Are you...

Oh, well, uh...

Yeah, that's terrific.

Yeah, they're gonna look good.

Oh, look at this.
Did you see this?

Donald got me, uh, diamond
cufflinks for my birthday.

Beautiful, right?

My darling,
this is cheap pewter.

The stone is zirconia.

They're fake.

Donald has no shame.

Everyone, I just, uh,
I just wanna say a few words.

Tonight we're celebrating
a really great guy, Roy Cohn.

Roy's tough. Some say vicious,
even scary.

I mean, look at him.

That's not exactly a face you
wanna bring home to your mother,

am I right?

But, um, you know, with Roy
it's about friendship, right?

He has to like you,
and if he doesn't, forget it.

He has to like you, right?
Thank God he liked me.

And, I mean, I don't know,
I mean, he must've thought

I was a baby or something,
'cause, you know, I don't drink,

I don't smoke,
I don't take drugs.

I have other problems which
I don't wanna tell you about,

but, uh...

for whatever reason,
he liked me.

But the truth is, as, uh,
tough as Roy is,

and he is brutal,

he, uh, truly is a loyal guy.

It's a matter of honour
with him.

And, um, frankly he's a hero.

Happy birthday, Roy.

- Happy birthday, Roy.
- This is to you,

and uh, mazel tov.

Well, uh...

I don't know what to say. Um...

Thank you, Donald.

24-carat American patriot
and a friend.

I know you're gonna go on
to do, uh, a lot of things

that would make me, uh,
very proud.

- Thank you.
- Well, it's not over yet, Roy.

What? My life?

Let's hope not.
Maybe not tonight.

Stay alive for
a little longer, Roy.

I gotta go, uh, to bed, I think.

Sorry.

♪ Sweet land of liberty ♪

♪ Of thee I sing ♪

♪ Land where my fathers died ♪

♪ Land of the pilgrim's pride ♪

♪ From every mountain side ♪

♪ Let freedom ring ♪

♪ My native country, thee ♪

♪ Land of the noble free ♪

♪ Thy name I love ♪

♪ I love thy rocks and rills ♪

♪ Thy woods and templed hills ♪

♪ My heart
with rapture thrills ♪

♪ Like that above ♪

♪ Let music swell the breeze ♪

♪ And ring from all the trees ♪

♪ Sweet freedom's song ♪

♪ Let mortal tongues awake ♪

♪ Let all that
breathe partake ♪

♪ Let rocks their
silence break ♪

♪ The sound prolong ♪

♪ Land where my fathers died ♪

♪ Land of the pilgrim's pride ♪

♪ From every mountainside ♪

♪ Let freedom ring ♪

There he is, huh? The greatest
writer of all time.

- How you doing?
- Sorry Tony,

I was with a contractor.

- It's all good.
- Well, here we go.

- Here we are.
- Where do you wanna start?

Let's see if this is gonna be
a negative book.

Well, honestly I'm amazed that
you asked me to write this book,

Mr Trump, considering
the article I wrote on you

wasn't exactly flattering.
- Yeah, well,

you put me on the cover
of New York Magazine,

and you can write.
That's the most important thing.

Now you just have to be nice
to me because I'm paying you.

Sure you are.

So, I was looking through some
of your interviews,

and I'm finding it hard
to settle on a grand narrative

for the book.
Yes, you like making deals...

Well, I'm gonna stop you right
there, Tony.

I don't, I don't like making
deals. Do you understand?

I love making deals.
I love making deals.

The bigger the better.

- But to what end?
- To what end?

Deals are the end. I mean,
that's like asking Da Vinci

why he, why he painted
the Mona Lisa.

You consider yourself an artist?

Well, I am an artist, Tony,
and deals are my art form.

Look, making deals
is an art form,

and I wanna put this
in the book.

It's something that
you're born with.

You either have it
or you don't have it, okay?

And if you don't have it,
don't do deals.

Just get a beautiful job,
have a nice family and relax.

The Art of the Deal.

That sounds good.

You know, I like that. That's...

I think people will buy
into that.

Well, let's see, Tony.
I'd buy that book.

Okay, let's go back
to your childhood.

Uh, living in Queens,
what was that like?

Well, I had a great childhood.

Very normal, uh,

wonderful parents,
supportive parents.

And, you know, my dad was tough,

and, uh, he helped me develop
a killer instinct.

And?

And, uh, yeah, frankly,

you know, I don't,
I don't wanna,

I don't like to talk too much
about the past, Tony.

You dwell on the past,
you go right down the tubes.

This is just to give the reader
some context.

Tony...

Don't, don't, don't come here
busting my balls

looking for some deep shit, alright?

I hate when everybody tries
to dig around your life

looking for some deep shit.

We're all animals.

Everybody wants to get rich
and have other people

suck their cock.
Everybody wants to win, Tony.

And that's the truth of it.

- But that won't read well.
- Well, that's the truth of it.

But it's not the truth
we're looking for right now.

Right now people need to think

there's some sort
of special sauce.

Principles, a set of rules
that make you different.

Well, that's easy,
'cause I have my rules.

I got three rules, okay?

They're my three rules
of winning.

Rule one, the world is a mess, okay?

The world is a mess, Tony.

You have to fight back,
you have to have a tough skin.

Attack, attack, attack.

If somebody comes after you
with a knife,

you shoot 'em back
with a bazooka, okay?

Rule two, what is truth, Tony?

What is truth?

You know what's truth?
What you say is truth,

what I say is truth,
what he says is truth.

What is the truth in life?
Deny everything, admit nothing.

You know what's true?
What I say is true.

And third of all,
and most important,

no matter how fucked you are,

you never, ever, ever
admit defeat.

You always claim victory.

Always.

You know, that sounds
like the US foreign policy

for the past quarter century.

Well, unlike that,
this actually works.

And I won a lot, Tony.
I won a lot.

And even when they said
I didn't,

I still turned it into a win,

and that was the difference.

So, how'd you come by
these set of rules?

Well, I have an instinct, Tony.
I have a killer instinct.

I always have.

Listen, Tony, you have to have
a natural ability.

I'm a big believer
in natural ability,

and a lot of that is genetics.
You have to be born with it,

you know, and some people
aren't and some people are,

and that's the difference.

You have to have it.