Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:08,884 --> 00:00:10,511
Hey, Roman, are you sleeping?
2
00:00:11,679 --> 00:00:12,763
Yes.
3
00:00:13,514 --> 00:00:15,057
Okay, cool.
4
00:00:15,766 --> 00:00:16,851
Hey, Roman?
5
00:00:17,768 --> 00:00:20,229
- What?
- Is the monster gone?
6
00:00:20,855 --> 00:00:23,691
We've talked
about this, okay?
7
00:00:23,691 --> 00:00:26,569
There is no monster!
8
00:00:28,654 --> 00:00:30,740
Why'd you scream? You scared me.
9
00:00:31,323 --> 00:00:35,077
I scared you?
Look, tha-- that's it, okay?
10
00:00:35,077 --> 00:00:37,788
I'm too old to be living with
a kid who believes in monsters.
11
00:00:38,289 --> 00:00:40,291
Remember what Gladys
at the dry cleaners said?
12
00:00:40,750 --> 00:00:42,209
That's the most ketchup
she's ever cleaned out
13
00:00:42,209 --> 00:00:43,335
of a young man's pants?
14
00:00:44,336 --> 00:00:46,422
Exactly. "A young man."
15
00:00:46,881 --> 00:00:48,507
And a young man,
needs his own room.
16
00:00:48,841 --> 00:00:50,551
N-- I'm talking to Mom and Dad.
17
00:00:56,265 --> 00:00:57,433
Well, that's new.
18
00:01:01,437 --> 00:01:03,397
Oh, hey, kid.
Is this the Russo house?
19
00:01:03,814 --> 00:01:05,316
What are you doing in my mirror?
20
00:01:05,316 --> 00:01:07,485
That's how we get places.
I'm a wizard.
21
00:01:07,777 --> 00:01:09,195
Where's your robe
and pointy hat?
22
00:01:09,653 --> 00:01:12,323
Let me clarify.
I'm a wizard with style.
23
00:01:18,329 --> 00:01:20,039
Billie, we can't go in that way.
24
00:01:21,332 --> 00:01:23,042
Wait! Who else is in there?
25
00:01:23,959 --> 00:01:25,377
Should I be changing
in the bathroom?
26
00:01:26,921 --> 00:01:28,714
- Okay, Milo.
- Roman.
27
00:01:28,714 --> 00:01:30,174
There's something
I gotta tell you.
28
00:01:30,174 --> 00:01:33,719
Me first, okay?
Maybe I flew off the handle.
29
00:01:34,094 --> 00:01:35,513
Not gonna move out.
30
00:01:35,513 --> 00:01:38,891
But promise me,
no more crazy made-up stories.
31
00:01:38,891 --> 00:01:43,229
- There's a wizard in our mirror!
- Dad, I need my own room!
32
00:01:46,941 --> 00:01:49,860
{\an8}♪ Everything is not
what it seems ♪
33
00:01:49,860 --> 00:01:51,737
{\an8}♪ When you can
have what you want ♪
34
00:01:51,737 --> 00:01:53,489
{\an8}♪ By the simplest of means ♪
35
00:01:53,697 --> 00:01:56,659
{\an8}♪ Be careful not to mess
with the balance of things ♪
36
00:01:56,659 --> 00:02:01,288
{\an8}♪ Because everything
is not what it seems ♪
37
00:02:01,288 --> 00:02:03,415
♪ You might run into trouble
if you go to extremes ♪
38
00:02:03,415 --> 00:02:06,293
♪ Because everything
is not what it seems ♪
39
00:02:06,627 --> 00:02:08,087
♪ Yes, please ♪
40
00:02:10,089 --> 00:02:11,799
♪ What it seems ♪
41
00:02:18,222 --> 00:02:20,099
{\an8}Oh! Hey there, good looking.
42
00:02:21,433 --> 00:02:22,560
Why, yes.
43
00:02:22,560 --> 00:02:26,355
{\an8}It is my birthday today.
Yeah, 34.
44
00:02:29,608 --> 00:02:31,777
Oh, you think the J-Man's
still got it?
45
00:02:32,528 --> 00:02:35,906
{\an8}I think you still got it.
Giada.
46
00:02:35,906 --> 00:02:38,242
You're awake. That's fun.
47
00:02:39,785 --> 00:02:41,328
Happy birthday, J-Man.
48
00:02:42,079 --> 00:02:43,914
You remembered my birthday.
49
00:02:43,914 --> 00:02:45,040
{\an8}How could I forget?
50
00:02:45,040 --> 00:02:47,126
{\an8}You sent me
four calendar invites.
51
00:02:48,043 --> 00:02:50,087
{\an8}Well, you do know that
coordinating family logistics
52
00:02:50,087 --> 00:02:51,922
{\an8}is my love language.
53
00:02:52,464 --> 00:02:54,967
Gross! Get a room!
54
00:02:55,551 --> 00:02:56,719
This is our room.
55
00:02:58,012 --> 00:03:00,264
Hey, guys! Anything
you wanna say to me today?
56
00:03:00,264 --> 00:03:03,309
Oh, thank you for asking.
I need my own room.
57
00:03:03,809 --> 00:03:06,395
No, like anything
you want to, uh, wish me?
58
00:03:06,770 --> 00:03:09,315
I wish you would give me
my own room.
59
00:03:11,275 --> 00:03:13,235
{\an8}Look what I woke up
to this morning.
60
00:03:13,527 --> 00:03:15,237
{\an8}It's so the monster
in the closet will think
61
00:03:15,237 --> 00:03:17,197
{\an8}I'm a monster
and go after Roman.
62
00:03:17,948 --> 00:03:19,783
Savage. Gets that from my side.
63
00:03:21,410 --> 00:03:24,079
{\an8}Mom, don't encourage him.
You should be telling him
64
00:03:24,079 --> 00:03:25,748
{\an8}there's no such thing
as monsters.
65
00:03:25,998 --> 00:03:27,291
{\an8}Back me up on this, Dad.
66
00:03:27,291 --> 00:03:28,626
{\an8}Absolutely, buddy.
67
00:03:28,626 --> 00:03:30,669
{\an8}There is no such thing
as monsters.
68
00:03:30,669 --> 00:03:32,171
{\an8}And I should know,
'cause I was not
69
00:03:32,171 --> 00:03:33,547
{\an8}a monster hunter
when I was your age.
70
00:03:34,006 --> 00:03:35,257
{\an8}You were a monster hunter?
71
00:03:35,257 --> 00:03:38,302
{\an8}No! No, I was very clear
when I said I was not
72
00:03:38,302 --> 00:03:40,262
{\an8}a monster hunter, okay?
I couldn't have been,
73
00:03:40,262 --> 00:03:41,347
because I'm not a wizard.
74
00:03:42,806 --> 00:03:44,016
What are we even talking about?
75
00:03:45,643 --> 00:03:49,313
Is Dad having a midlife crisis?
Are you getting a tattoo?
76
00:03:49,605 --> 00:03:50,648
Ooh, are you?
77
00:03:51,565 --> 00:03:53,233
- No, and I am not midlife--
- M'kay.
78
00:03:53,233 --> 00:03:54,860
Guys, I turned 34 today.
79
00:03:55,110 --> 00:03:56,111
It's your birthday?
80
00:03:57,613 --> 00:03:58,447
Be honest with me, does no one
check the family calendar?
81
00:03:59,907 --> 00:04:02,159
We all love the calendar,
big fans of the calendar. Okay.
82
00:04:02,159 --> 00:04:05,120
Boys, go get dressed.
I think your dad needs a moment.
83
00:04:05,746 --> 00:04:08,624
Listen, don't freak out,
84
00:04:08,624 --> 00:04:09,792
but I got you a little surprise
for your birthday.
85
00:04:10,417 --> 00:04:11,752
But... I don't like surprises.
86
00:04:11,961 --> 00:04:13,128
Oh, you're gonna like this one.
87
00:04:14,672 --> 00:04:16,590
Okay, I can handle this.
Maybe liking surprises
88
00:04:16,590 --> 00:04:18,467
will be a new thing for me.
Yeah, yeah.
89
00:04:18,467 --> 00:04:20,469
Oh, who am I kidding? Giada!
90
00:04:25,307 --> 00:04:26,475
Let's just go in this way.
91
00:04:27,810 --> 00:04:28,727
No,
we have to use the front door.
92
00:04:30,187 --> 00:04:32,189
Like a mortal?
Aw, man, nobody better see me.
93
00:04:35,943 --> 00:04:38,988
Giada! Hey, um, uh, yeah...
94
00:04:39,530 --> 00:04:42,074
Giada, why-- why don't
you tell me what it is, okay?
95
00:04:42,074 --> 00:04:43,492
And you'll be like, "Surprise!"
96
00:04:43,492 --> 00:04:46,078
And then I'll be like,
"No freaking way!"
97
00:04:46,078 --> 00:04:48,080
Gia-- Huh?
98
00:04:51,208 --> 00:04:53,419
Look who's using the front door
just like one of you people.
99
00:04:55,546 --> 00:04:56,547
Surprise!
100
00:05:02,177 --> 00:05:03,595
No freaking way.
101
00:05:04,138 --> 00:05:06,598
I know,
I look fantastic, don't I?
102
00:05:07,850 --> 00:05:09,935
Alex, [stammers] are you
here for my birthday?
103
00:05:10,436 --> 00:05:13,856
It's your... It-- uh... It's
your birthday! That's why...
104
00:05:13,856 --> 00:05:15,357
That's why I came, you know?
Aw.
105
00:05:15,357 --> 00:05:17,067
That's why we're here.
We came for your birthday.
106
00:05:19,361 --> 00:05:21,488
You dragged me here
for your brother's birthday?
107
00:05:21,488 --> 00:05:22,865
No, I brought you here,
108
00:05:22,865 --> 00:05:24,533
so you can meet your
new wizard teacher.
109
00:05:24,742 --> 00:05:27,244
I don't need a new teacher.
They never believe in me anyway.
110
00:05:27,494 --> 00:05:30,456
Well, this one will.
He's the best I've ever known.
111
00:05:30,456 --> 00:05:32,166
Annoyingly. But...
112
00:05:32,499 --> 00:05:33,917
I just have
to find a way to ask him.
113
00:05:33,917 --> 00:05:35,419
He can be a little high-strung.
114
00:05:35,627 --> 00:05:37,004
Did you guys track this dirt in?
115
00:05:40,132 --> 00:05:41,633
Okay, a lot high-strung.
116
00:05:43,844 --> 00:05:46,305
So, you're the guy who owns
all the sandwich shops?
117
00:05:46,305 --> 00:05:47,389
Like, the billionaire?
118
00:05:47,639 --> 00:05:49,475
Uh, no. That would be Max.
119
00:05:49,475 --> 00:05:51,185
I'm a middle school
vice principal, which some
120
00:05:51,185 --> 00:05:53,395
would say is much cooler
than being a billionaire.
121
00:05:53,395 --> 00:05:54,813
- Nobody says that.
- I would never say that.
122
00:05:56,815 --> 00:05:58,984
Uh, and Alex, who is this?
123
00:05:59,276 --> 00:06:02,988
Oh, um, this is Billie.
She's... with me.
124
00:06:03,739 --> 00:06:05,574
Well, that clears everything up.
125
00:06:07,201 --> 00:06:09,578
- Aunt Alex!
- Oh, my gosh! Hi, guys!
126
00:06:09,578 --> 00:06:12,623
How are you?
I bought you presents.
127
00:06:12,623 --> 00:06:14,166
Because I'm the coolest aunt,
like ever.
128
00:06:14,166 --> 00:06:15,667
Oh! Shirts.
- So...
129
00:06:16,835 --> 00:06:18,545
Straight outta WizTech.
- Alex.
130
00:06:19,129 --> 00:06:20,547
Can I speak with you in private?
131
00:06:24,259 --> 00:06:26,220
That's the wizard girl
from our mirror.
132
00:06:26,595 --> 00:06:27,721
Dude, you're gonna
weird her out.
133
00:06:29,014 --> 00:06:29,598
Hey, what kind of mileage
does this thing get?
134
00:06:32,351 --> 00:06:34,061
Okay, maybe
she's gonna weird us out.
135
00:06:36,438 --> 00:06:37,648
Uh, what are these?
136
00:06:37,981 --> 00:06:39,858
Uh, hilarious novelty tees.
137
00:06:41,193 --> 00:06:42,319
About wizards.
138
00:06:42,319 --> 00:06:45,864
Well, we are wizards.
139
00:06:45,864 --> 00:06:47,908
Okay, we're talking
over here now.
140
00:06:49,493 --> 00:06:51,328
Remember how
the last time we talked,
141
00:06:51,620 --> 00:06:53,539
you asked me when I was going
to tell Giada and the kids
142
00:06:53,539 --> 00:06:55,082
that I was from
a family of wizards?
143
00:06:55,457 --> 00:06:58,377
- Yeah.
- Well, I kinda sort of haven't.
144
00:06:58,919 --> 00:07:01,380
You're still lying
to your family, Justin? I'm...
145
00:07:02,256 --> 00:07:03,382
I'm so proud of you.
146
00:07:05,134 --> 00:07:07,511
I'm not lying, Alex.
Technically, I'm not a wizard.
147
00:07:07,511 --> 00:07:09,721
Okay? Anymore.
I haven't picked up a wand
148
00:07:09,721 --> 00:07:10,973
since I got fired from WizTech.
149
00:07:11,390 --> 00:07:13,308
Oh... Yeah.
The unicorn incident.
150
00:07:13,308 --> 00:07:15,144
- That was hilarious-- Awful.
- Awful!
151
00:07:15,144 --> 00:07:17,688
It was so awful.
That's what I was trying to say.
152
00:07:18,021 --> 00:07:22,151
Uh, but don't you miss it?
You know, teaching wizards?
153
00:07:22,901 --> 00:07:25,863
No. I don't even
think about it every day.
154
00:07:27,990 --> 00:07:29,783
- You just said every day.
- Yes, I didn't.
155
00:07:32,494 --> 00:07:34,454
Look, okay?
Just while you're here,
156
00:07:34,872 --> 00:07:37,624
no talk about magic
and no wizard talk, okay?
157
00:07:37,624 --> 00:07:41,461
Fine. What exactly does your
family think I do for a living?
158
00:07:41,795 --> 00:07:42,838
Professional dog walker.
159
00:07:45,591 --> 00:07:48,218
I want to be offended, but I do
love dogs, so...
160
00:07:49,052 --> 00:07:50,637
All right, fine.
I won't blow your cover.
161
00:07:50,971 --> 00:07:53,390
Thank you. And what
about Billie? Is she cool?
162
00:07:53,390 --> 00:07:54,516
I promise.
163
00:07:56,059 --> 00:07:57,477
Billie definitely won't say
anything about being a wizard.
164
00:07:57,769 --> 00:07:58,812
I'm a wizard!
165
00:08:01,231 --> 00:08:03,942
- I told you.
- Milo, she's not a wizard.
166
00:08:04,234 --> 00:08:05,485
I know you didn't just say that.
167
00:08:06,528 --> 00:08:07,571
There's no
such thing as wizards.
168
00:08:08,780 --> 00:08:09,156
And I know
you did not just say that.
169
00:08:10,324 --> 00:08:12,075
It's not personal.
He doesn't believe me
170
00:08:12,075 --> 00:08:13,827
about the monster
in our closet either.
171
00:08:13,827 --> 00:08:15,495
Uh--
Because monsters aren't real,
172
00:08:15,871 --> 00:08:17,247
just like wizards aren't real.
173
00:08:17,497 --> 00:08:19,499
Okay, smart guy,
show me your closet then.
174
00:08:19,833 --> 00:08:22,419
Fine, but all that's
gonna prove is that I have
175
00:08:22,419 --> 00:08:23,712
great taste in cardigans.
176
00:08:27,299 --> 00:08:29,676
There it is. There's the closet.
177
00:08:29,676 --> 00:08:30,886
Open it up.
178
00:08:30,886 --> 00:08:33,347
This is your dumb thing.
You open it.
179
00:08:33,347 --> 00:08:36,225
I'm not opening it.
I like being alive.
180
00:08:37,017 --> 00:08:39,186
Well, guess you're both
too scared to open it.
181
00:08:39,436 --> 00:08:41,438
I am.
Thought I was clear about that.
182
00:08:42,606 --> 00:08:43,941
Hey, fine, I'll open it.
183
00:08:45,943 --> 00:08:47,319
From the place
where dark beasts dwell,
184
00:08:47,778 --> 00:08:49,529
I summon a floogie
with this spell.
185
00:08:50,697 --> 00:08:53,158
Get ready to not see...
186
00:08:57,788 --> 00:08:59,289
Why are you laughing?!
187
00:08:59,623 --> 00:09:02,542
Because,
you said monsters aren't real,
188
00:09:02,793 --> 00:09:05,796
so I conjured one,
'cause I'm a wizard, ahwandra.
189
00:09:09,883 --> 00:09:12,386
Please tell me there's a spell
to make it go away.
190
00:09:13,053 --> 00:09:14,930
There is, I just don't know it.
191
00:09:17,015 --> 00:09:18,892
You don't know
how to send it back?
192
00:09:19,142 --> 00:09:20,602
Then why did you conjure it?
193
00:09:20,602 --> 00:09:22,854
- 'Cause you said I couldn't.
- You can't argue with the logic.
194
00:09:27,943 --> 00:09:29,027
I don't hear anything.
195
00:09:31,655 --> 00:09:34,408
See? Uh, maybe the monster
went away on its own?
196
00:09:34,783 --> 00:09:37,035
Yeah, that definitely happens.
Go check it out.
197
00:09:43,250 --> 00:09:46,003
You checked it out?
What is wrong with you?
198
00:09:46,003 --> 00:09:48,130
Me?
We didn't have a monster
199
00:09:48,130 --> 00:09:50,048
in the closet
until you came along!
200
00:09:50,048 --> 00:09:52,175
- Actually--
- Not now, Milo!
201
00:09:56,221 --> 00:09:57,389
My dad cannot find out
202
00:09:57,389 --> 00:09:58,682
there's a monster
running around the house.
203
00:09:58,890 --> 00:10:00,100
- It'll--
- Ruin his birthday.
204
00:10:01,643 --> 00:10:04,229
His birthday? If Justin Russo
finds out wizards are real,
205
00:10:04,521 --> 00:10:06,565
- his head's gonna explode!
- Cool.
206
00:10:07,566 --> 00:10:09,276
Why did you bring
that... that...
207
00:10:09,526 --> 00:10:10,986
- Floogie.
- ...that floogie here,
208
00:10:10,986 --> 00:10:12,237
if you couldn't get rid of it?
209
00:10:12,237 --> 00:10:13,613
'Cause I didn't know
I couldn't get rid of it
210
00:10:13,613 --> 00:10:14,781
until I brought it here.
211
00:10:16,158 --> 00:10:18,452
You need to go back to...
wizard school.
212
00:10:18,869 --> 00:10:20,287
Well, I can't,
'cause I got kicked out.
213
00:10:21,872 --> 00:10:24,082
It's not my fault
my teachers don't believe in me.
214
00:10:24,333 --> 00:10:26,335
But I don't need them.
I don't need anyone.
215
00:10:26,543 --> 00:10:28,003
We definitely need someone.
216
00:10:30,839 --> 00:10:33,133
No, we don't. I can fix this.
217
00:10:33,133 --> 00:10:34,760
I'll get rid
of the floogie myself.
218
00:10:35,761 --> 00:10:36,762
Please.
219
00:10:37,220 --> 00:10:39,097
All right, fine.
But if that thing
220
00:10:39,097 --> 00:10:40,349
poops in the house,
you're cleaning it up.
221
00:10:41,683 --> 00:10:43,101
Oh, they don't poop.
They flarf. It's way worse.
222
00:10:46,855 --> 00:10:49,733
So, hypothetically, yeah, I use
words like hypothetically now,
223
00:10:50,984 --> 00:10:52,903
what would you say
if someone were to ask you
224
00:10:52,903 --> 00:10:54,112
to go back to teaching magic?
225
00:10:54,446 --> 00:10:56,031
Alex, what is this all about?
226
00:10:56,573 --> 00:11:00,035
Oh! Sorry I took so long.
Mr. Kopecky from next door
227
00:11:00,035 --> 00:11:02,329
forced me to look at pictures
of his grandson.
228
00:11:02,537 --> 00:11:04,915
Now, I would never say
that a baby is ugly,
229
00:11:04,915 --> 00:11:06,833
but this baby,
it looks like a foot.
230
00:11:08,710 --> 00:11:10,462
- Alex!
- Hey, Giada.
231
00:11:10,462 --> 00:11:11,671
What are you doing here?
232
00:11:13,215 --> 00:11:15,008
Giada, come on. I know that
Alex is my birthday surprise.
233
00:11:15,008 --> 00:11:16,385
Whoa, babe,
I would never ambush you
234
00:11:16,385 --> 00:11:17,677
with family
and call it a present.
235
00:11:18,261 --> 00:11:19,888
So, Alex, how's work?
236
00:11:20,138 --> 00:11:22,307
Uh, work's great.
I'm on the Tribunal now.
237
00:11:22,724 --> 00:11:26,269
- You're on the Tribunal?
- There's a dog-walking tribunal?
238
00:11:27,437 --> 00:11:28,939
Yeah. Yeah, they were like,
239
00:11:29,439 --> 00:11:33,443
"Alex, there are some pretty bad
dogs out there, and...
240
00:11:33,443 --> 00:11:35,779
and you're the only one
that can help."
241
00:11:36,613 --> 00:11:38,865
Oh, you're
the only one, huh? You?
242
00:11:40,117 --> 00:11:41,910
Yeah.
Why is it so hard to believe?
243
00:11:41,910 --> 00:11:43,286
I mean, I am the family...
244
00:11:44,121 --> 00:11:45,205
dog walker.
245
00:11:46,623 --> 00:11:48,542
But I practically taught you
how to walk those dogs.
246
00:11:49,000 --> 00:11:51,169
If anyone should have been
on the Tribunal, we both know
247
00:11:51,169 --> 00:11:52,546
that it should have been moi.
248
00:11:54,047 --> 00:11:55,966
Okay. Well, if you wanted
to make the Tribunal so badly,
249
00:11:55,966 --> 00:11:57,467
maybe you shouldn't have
hung up your leash.
250
00:11:57,801 --> 00:11:59,428
Okay, you know, well,
this is getting awkward.
251
00:11:59,428 --> 00:12:01,721
Is anybody thirsty? I'm not,
but I'm gonna leave anyway.
252
00:12:03,640 --> 00:12:05,016
Dude, what's your problem?
253
00:12:05,016 --> 00:12:07,310
I thought you were happy
you left wizarding behind.
254
00:12:07,561 --> 00:12:11,356
I am, okay? I like my quiet,
predictable, no surprises life.
255
00:12:11,731 --> 00:12:14,401
Then why are you acting
like you have flarf for brains?
256
00:12:15,068 --> 00:12:17,529
First, we don't use that kind
of language in this house.
257
00:12:19,531 --> 00:12:22,033
And second, if you're not
my birthday surprise,
258
00:12:22,367 --> 00:12:23,577
what are you doing here, Alex?
259
00:12:25,120 --> 00:12:28,665
Okay fine. Um, Billie is one of
the most extraordinary wizards
260
00:12:28,665 --> 00:12:30,417
I've ever met. But she needs...
261
00:12:31,710 --> 00:12:32,711
What was that?
262
00:12:34,921 --> 00:12:36,506
Giada!
263
00:12:42,721 --> 00:12:44,014
This looks like
a floogie freeze.
264
00:12:45,474 --> 00:12:47,350
Oh, look at you remembering
your class-three monsters.
265
00:12:47,350 --> 00:12:49,186
- Just like old times.
When we were little, I used--
- Oh, no.
266
00:12:49,186 --> 00:12:52,272
No, no, no, no, no. No.
You said you wouldn't do magic.
267
00:12:52,522 --> 00:12:54,024
I didn't do this. It...
268
00:12:54,691 --> 00:12:56,651
- Billie...
- This is classic Alex.
269
00:12:57,068 --> 00:12:58,987
You're here for five minutes
and I got a floogie infestation,
270
00:12:58,987 --> 00:13:00,530
and just look
at my beautiful wife!
271
00:13:03,074 --> 00:13:06,620
I'll handle this. After all,
I am the family dog walker.
272
00:13:08,663 --> 00:13:11,583
The only way to unfreeze her
is to banish the floogie back
where it came from.
273
00:13:11,583 --> 00:13:15,629
I know, but thank you for the
refresher because... I forgot.
274
00:13:18,465 --> 00:13:20,926
Whatever you do,
do not look the floogie
275
00:13:20,926 --> 00:13:22,594
right in the eye,
or he'll freeze you.
276
00:13:22,844 --> 00:13:25,472
Which one?
The thing's 90 percent eyes!
277
00:13:25,722 --> 00:13:28,391
It's over there!
278
00:13:32,479 --> 00:13:33,730
He's eating the couch!
279
00:13:33,939 --> 00:13:35,565
Dad won't even let us
eat on the couch!
280
00:13:39,110 --> 00:13:42,072
Roman, look out!
281
00:13:43,823 --> 00:13:46,952
- Milo!
- He saved you.
282
00:13:47,577 --> 00:13:50,288
Well, we're Russos. Russos
always have each other's backs.
283
00:13:51,373 --> 00:13:53,166
So, you would have done
the same thing for him?
284
00:13:54,167 --> 00:13:56,795
I would have...
strongly considered it.
285
00:13:57,879 --> 00:14:00,423
We should hide him
until I can banish the floogie.
286
00:14:00,674 --> 00:14:02,551
I think if your parents
saw their son frozen solid,
287
00:14:02,551 --> 00:14:03,677
it'd be pretty upsetting.
288
00:14:03,969 --> 00:14:05,470
Do you? Do you think that?
289
00:14:06,805 --> 00:14:07,889
What are we gonna do
about the couch?
290
00:14:10,308 --> 00:14:11,851
- Oh, nice.
- Let's go.
291
00:14:17,107 --> 00:14:18,858
Where are we hiding the kid?
292
00:14:18,858 --> 00:14:20,902
An infinity pocket?
Bottomless bag?
293
00:14:20,902 --> 00:14:22,988
You know, I can open a portal
to the Nowhere Zone.
294
00:14:23,405 --> 00:14:24,698
I'm not sending
my little brother
295
00:14:24,698 --> 00:14:26,700
to the Nowhere Zone.
He's got a field trip tomorrow.
296
00:14:27,951 --> 00:14:29,202
Help me put him on the bike.
297
00:14:38,837 --> 00:14:41,256
- A helmet? Really?
- It's the law!
298
00:14:45,010 --> 00:14:47,804
All right, Giada,
we're almost there.
299
00:14:48,263 --> 00:14:51,600
There we go.
Okay. Sorry.
300
00:14:51,600 --> 00:14:56,062
that's...
Oh! Hey, g-- guys.
301
00:14:56,813 --> 00:14:58,898
I didn't know you were...
...out here.
302
00:14:59,107 --> 00:15:03,987
Oh, yeah, I was just showing
Billie the water heater.
303
00:15:03,987 --> 00:15:06,072
- Yeah.
- And I was just...
304
00:15:06,323 --> 00:15:09,117
I was just carrying
whatever's under this blanket.
305
00:15:09,367 --> 00:15:13,038
Well, that is some very
306
00:15:13,038 --> 00:15:16,166
normal behavior
from the both of us.
307
00:15:16,166 --> 00:15:18,209
Ta-ta.
308
00:15:19,961 --> 00:15:22,380
Uh, Roman, just real quick, bud.
309
00:15:22,922 --> 00:15:25,091
You haven't seen anything,
like, weird going on
310
00:15:25,091 --> 00:15:26,468
around here today, have you?
311
00:15:27,135 --> 00:15:31,848
Uh... No, no, no, no,
nothing weird.
312
00:15:32,015 --> 00:15:34,267
Just the regular old
boring Russos.
313
00:15:34,726 --> 00:15:36,770
No reason for you
to get worked up, Dad.
314
00:15:37,354 --> 00:15:39,272
Wait, wait, wait,
you're saying we're boring?
You think we're boring?
315
00:15:39,522 --> 00:15:41,441
Oh, yeah, totally,
totally the boring-est.
316
00:15:42,317 --> 00:15:44,319
Maybe I could stand to use
a little excitement in life.
317
00:15:44,319 --> 00:15:47,030
Well, well,
you are not gonna find it here,
318
00:15:47,030 --> 00:15:50,200
because our house
is boring central.
319
00:15:51,242 --> 00:15:54,412
See, I'm getting bored
just talking about it.
320
00:15:55,163 --> 00:15:56,873
See ya.
321
00:16:00,669 --> 00:16:03,963
Not there. Not there.
322
00:16:05,924 --> 00:16:09,302
Not there.
There you are.
323
00:16:12,263 --> 00:16:14,516
I guess I could start looking
for the floogie now.
324
00:16:19,104 --> 00:16:21,648
- Oh, hi, Alex. Bye, Alex.
- No, no.
325
00:16:22,691 --> 00:16:26,194
I knew it. You had something
to do with the floogie.
326
00:16:26,194 --> 00:16:27,779
This is just like
when you put a curse
327
00:16:27,779 --> 00:16:29,364
on Professor
Dinklebot's toothbrush.
328
00:16:30,365 --> 00:16:33,535
He was shaving
his tongue for a month.
329
00:16:33,535 --> 00:16:35,120
That was hilarious.
- I know!
330
00:16:35,120 --> 00:16:38,164
But no!
This is not a laughing matter.
331
00:16:38,665 --> 00:16:41,209
Oh, you made me
sound like my mother. Billie,
332
00:16:42,001 --> 00:16:44,587
Justin is not gonna teach you if
he thinks that you're trouble.
333
00:16:45,255 --> 00:16:47,799
- Sounds like a win-win to me.
- You don't get it.
334
00:16:48,800 --> 00:16:50,343
This is your last chance.
335
00:16:51,136 --> 00:16:52,887
The Tribunal thinks
that you're dangerous
336
00:16:52,887 --> 00:16:54,139
and they wanna take your wand.
337
00:16:54,139 --> 00:16:56,307
But that's not fair.
I'm a great wizard.
338
00:16:56,307 --> 00:16:59,102
You're a powerful wizard.
There's a difference.
339
00:16:59,811 --> 00:17:02,313
I'm not dangerous, and I'll
prove it. I can fix this.
340
00:17:02,313 --> 00:17:06,025
Just stay out of the way. You've
done quite enough, young lady.
341
00:17:06,693 --> 00:17:08,361
Who am I right now?
342
00:17:11,865 --> 00:17:13,408
Hey, where are you going?
343
00:17:13,408 --> 00:17:15,410
I'm going upstairs
to find that floogie.
344
00:17:16,661 --> 00:17:17,746
What do you think you're doing?
345
00:17:18,037 --> 00:17:20,623
Going with you.
You mess everything up!
346
00:17:20,915 --> 00:17:23,293
- You clearly need help!
- No, I don't!
347
00:17:23,877 --> 00:17:26,755
With magic cast by me alone,
I send thee to the Nowhere Zone.
348
00:17:30,633 --> 00:17:32,218
Here, floogie, floogie!
349
00:17:37,265 --> 00:17:42,771
Levitatus sofitus.
Wow, it's clean under here.
350
00:17:42,771 --> 00:17:44,856
What am I talking about?
We're at Justin's house.
351
00:17:44,856 --> 00:17:46,608
Of course
he vacuums under the couch.
352
00:17:49,194 --> 00:17:51,321
I wasn't using magic!
353
00:17:52,655 --> 00:17:56,993
Listen, Alex. I'm sorry
that I snapped at you, okay?
354
00:17:56,993 --> 00:17:59,579
It's just, you were talking
about all the great stuff
355
00:17:59,579 --> 00:18:01,998
you're doing, and I got jealous.
356
00:18:02,665 --> 00:18:03,833
Really? Of me?
357
00:18:04,292 --> 00:18:08,129
Yeah. You know,
maybe I do miss being a wizard.
358
00:18:09,714 --> 00:18:11,633
I'm so happy
to hear you say that.
359
00:18:12,759 --> 00:18:16,471
- Why?
- Okay, Billie is an incredibly
360
00:18:16,471 --> 00:18:19,140
powerful wizard,
but she's rebellious,
361
00:18:19,140 --> 00:18:22,644
and stubborn and sarcastic.
She has no discipline.
362
00:18:22,852 --> 00:18:24,229
Sounds like
someone else I know.
363
00:18:24,229 --> 00:18:25,688
Like me, I get it.
364
00:18:26,105 --> 00:18:28,525
But I had Dad.
365
00:18:28,525 --> 00:18:31,986
and I had you.
Billie has no one.
366
00:18:32,320 --> 00:18:34,906
Every teacher she's ever had
has given up on her.
367
00:18:36,115 --> 00:18:39,744
- It's kinda why I'm here. I'm--
- No, Alex. No.
368
00:18:39,994 --> 00:18:43,081
I mean, I... I... I...
I don't teach wizards anymore.
369
00:18:43,456 --> 00:18:45,667
Justin, you were
the youngest headmaster
370
00:18:45,667 --> 00:18:47,293
of WizTech in history.
371
00:18:47,627 --> 00:18:49,128
Yeah, and then I got fired.
372
00:18:49,462 --> 00:18:52,006
So, what?
You just hide out here
373
00:18:52,006 --> 00:18:54,259
in Staten Island
and deny who you are?
374
00:18:55,134 --> 00:18:58,054
I don't want my family
to know anything about my past.
375
00:18:59,639 --> 00:19:01,599
So, you're ashamed
of being a wizard?
376
00:19:02,225 --> 00:19:05,270
No. A failure.
377
00:19:13,403 --> 00:19:15,613
You only fail
if you give up, Justin.
378
00:19:17,782 --> 00:19:20,159
Billie needs a teacher
who believes in her.
379
00:19:21,452 --> 00:19:24,873
She needs you,
like I needed you.
380
00:19:27,584 --> 00:19:30,461
I don't know
if I have it in me to try again.
381
00:19:37,760 --> 00:19:39,512
This couch feels
two inches further to the left.
382
00:19:42,098 --> 00:19:43,641
Billie!
383
00:19:51,024 --> 00:19:53,610
Alex, there's a gigantic floogie
in my kid's room!
384
00:19:53,860 --> 00:19:57,906
Really? Where?
Billie, what did you do?
385
00:19:58,281 --> 00:20:00,909
I tried banishing it, but I only
made it bigger. Alex, please!
386
00:20:02,035 --> 00:20:04,621
I thought I could do it,
but I can't. I was wrong.
387
00:20:06,039 --> 00:20:07,582
Alex, what are you doing!?
Banish it for her!
388
00:20:14,839 --> 00:20:16,633
Alex!
Don't! Come here!
389
00:20:22,555 --> 00:20:25,266
What are we gonna do?
Alex is the only wizard
390
00:20:25,266 --> 00:20:27,477
strong enough
to banish that thing. You do it.
391
00:20:27,477 --> 00:20:28,770
I... I can't do it.
392
00:20:29,145 --> 00:20:31,230
But Alex said you were the best
she's ever known.
393
00:20:31,564 --> 00:20:32,899
Would've been nice
to hear that from her.
394
00:20:35,151 --> 00:20:38,363
Listen to me. You have
to do this, okay? Only you can.
395
00:20:38,363 --> 00:20:40,156
I already tried, but I failed.
396
00:20:43,201 --> 00:20:45,078
A wise wizard once told me,
you only fail if you give up.
397
00:20:45,578 --> 00:20:47,747
Now, what were you thinking
when you summoned it?
398
00:20:47,747 --> 00:20:49,499
Guess I just thought
of the floogie, the closet,
399
00:20:49,499 --> 00:20:51,292
and then I said the spell,
and it was there.
400
00:20:53,836 --> 00:20:55,880
Just focus, okay?
Clear your mind.
401
00:20:55,880 --> 00:20:57,715
I told you, I can't.
402
00:20:58,591 --> 00:21:00,718
My teachers were right
not to believe in me.
403
00:21:02,512 --> 00:21:06,140
No. No, no, no.
You just had the wrong teachers.
404
00:21:06,140 --> 00:21:09,227
Okay? Hey,
you got this, all right?
405
00:21:09,936 --> 00:21:11,521
I believe in you, okay?
406
00:21:12,605 --> 00:21:14,023
Think of the place
you wanna send the floogie.
407
00:21:14,357 --> 00:21:16,901
And repeat after me.
408
00:21:17,902 --> 00:21:21,406
With magic strong
and words of power.
409
00:21:26,577 --> 00:21:28,204
We banish you, floogie,
at this hour.
410
00:21:29,330 --> 00:21:30,957
We banish you, floogie,
at this hour.
411
00:21:34,127 --> 00:21:36,045
Now, together.
412
00:21:36,421 --> 00:21:37,922
Back to the road
from whence you came,
413
00:21:37,922 --> 00:21:39,298
and never ever more remain.
414
00:21:49,559 --> 00:21:51,144
We did it!
415
00:21:53,271 --> 00:21:56,357
- You did it.
- And I knew that you could.
416
00:21:58,359 --> 00:21:59,360
Justin taught me.
417
00:21:59,736 --> 00:22:01,571
Oh, thought you don't
teach anymore.
418
00:22:02,530 --> 00:22:04,323
Wait, did you let yourself
get frozen on purpose
419
00:22:04,323 --> 00:22:05,700
so I'd have to step in
and instruct her,
420
00:22:05,700 --> 00:22:07,243
thus rediscovering
my love of teaching?
421
00:22:08,369 --> 00:22:10,538
That would've been
a really smart plan.
422
00:22:10,788 --> 00:22:12,206
Well, and I don't know
if you did or you didn't.
423
00:22:12,206 --> 00:22:14,083
That's just the way I want it.
424
00:22:18,629 --> 00:22:20,339
I was hanging
on my bike forever.
425
00:22:20,339 --> 00:22:22,967
I'm gonna have to put lotion
on my tender parts.
426
00:22:24,093 --> 00:22:25,970
She trapped me
in the Nowhere Zone.
427
00:22:26,429 --> 00:22:27,972
I saw things I can't forget.
428
00:22:28,514 --> 00:22:30,933
They don't have a lotion
for your brain, Milo.
429
00:22:31,851 --> 00:22:32,935
Actually, they do.
430
00:22:34,145 --> 00:22:34,812
But the worm
that makes it has to crawl in
431
00:22:34,812 --> 00:22:35,980
through your earhole.
432
00:22:37,648 --> 00:22:40,109
But for real,
thanks for trying to help me.
433
00:22:40,693 --> 00:22:42,320
Thanks for saving my family.
434
00:22:43,613 --> 00:22:45,031
I mean, you are the one
that put them in danger,
435
00:22:45,031 --> 00:22:47,075
but... thanks.
436
00:22:48,367 --> 00:22:50,328
It was so weird.
I-- I'm in the kitchen,
437
00:22:50,536 --> 00:22:51,746
and the next thing I know,
438
00:22:51,746 --> 00:22:53,539
I'm in the garage
with a blanket over my head.
439
00:22:53,539 --> 00:22:55,917
That is weird.
440
00:22:57,335 --> 00:22:58,461
You know, it's probably best
441
00:22:58,461 --> 00:23:00,004
to just forget about it
and move on.
442
00:23:02,423 --> 00:23:04,634
You know, I could hit her
with a little cerebellum erasus
443
00:23:04,634 --> 00:23:05,802
and erase her memory.
444
00:23:05,802 --> 00:23:07,178
Keep your wand
out of my wife's head.
445
00:23:10,181 --> 00:23:12,058
So, Milo, I've been thinking.
446
00:23:12,517 --> 00:23:14,477
Um, now that we know
that wizards are real,
447
00:23:14,477 --> 00:23:15,603
and monsters are real...
448
00:23:15,603 --> 00:23:17,480
I already knew that,
but continue.
449
00:23:19,857 --> 00:23:21,984
I've, uh, I've decided
to stay in our room.
450
00:23:22,360 --> 00:23:24,237
You know,
for when you get scared.
451
00:23:24,529 --> 00:23:26,114
When he gets scared
or when you get scared?
452
00:23:27,073 --> 00:23:30,451
When are you leaving?
Hey, Dad, when is she leaving?
453
00:23:30,827 --> 00:23:33,538
Actually, I was thinking
she could, uh, stay with us
454
00:23:33,538 --> 00:23:34,622
for a little while.
455
00:23:35,790 --> 00:23:37,667
- Are you sure?
- Yeah, Dad, are you sure?
456
00:23:39,544 --> 00:23:40,586
What do you think?
457
00:23:41,796 --> 00:23:45,299
I think
I could learn a lot here.
458
00:23:46,634 --> 00:23:48,094
And Giada's cool with this?
459
00:23:48,094 --> 00:23:49,470
- Totally.
- You didn't ask her.
460
00:23:49,679 --> 00:23:51,097
I didn't.
461
00:23:52,348 --> 00:23:54,225
Can't believe you're staying.
462
00:23:55,852 --> 00:23:57,228
You know,
I thought the face you made
463
00:23:57,228 --> 00:23:59,105
when you saw the floogie
was my favourite.
464
00:23:59,522 --> 00:24:00,982
But now it's this one.
465
00:24:00,982 --> 00:24:02,942
This one is definitely
my favorite.
466
00:24:04,527 --> 00:24:06,195
Happy birthday, J-Man.
467
00:24:06,195 --> 00:24:07,572
- Aw.
- Happy birthday!
468
00:24:07,780 --> 00:24:09,657
Oh, right, it's your birthday.
469
00:24:14,036 --> 00:24:16,289
If I'm gonna train you,
it can't be here.
470
00:24:16,289 --> 00:24:17,415
Why not?
471
00:24:17,415 --> 00:24:19,208
His family
doesn't know about wizards.
472
00:24:20,168 --> 00:24:23,212
Right! [laughs] Yes,
they do not know about wizards,
473
00:24:23,212 --> 00:24:25,464
'cause I didn't tell them.
So, unless you told them--
474
00:24:25,464 --> 00:24:27,466
You know,
that is a really nice cardigan.
475
00:24:29,468 --> 00:24:30,595
Thank you.
476
00:24:31,888 --> 00:24:34,307
Alex, will you do the honors?
477
00:24:34,557 --> 00:24:36,475
Mm-hm.
478
00:24:45,359 --> 00:24:47,904
The old lair,
this takes me back.
479
00:24:47,904 --> 00:24:49,822
Oh!
480
00:24:59,749 --> 00:25:02,877
Hello, Wandy. My old friend.
481
00:25:07,006 --> 00:25:08,799
You know, I thought
you were just bringing me
482
00:25:08,799 --> 00:25:10,092
to another teacher
who doesn't care.
483
00:25:10,635 --> 00:25:13,638
But, I was wrong.
Thanks for believing in me.
484
00:25:13,846 --> 00:25:16,682
Of course. Us rebels,
we gotta stick together.
485
00:25:16,682 --> 00:25:18,434
Look, I have to go back
486
00:25:18,434 --> 00:25:19,810
to the Tribunal. Are you good?
487
00:25:20,144 --> 00:25:21,812
Don't worry. I'll be okay here.
488
00:25:22,188 --> 00:25:24,232
Zippo zap,
zippo zee, zippo zeria!
489
00:25:26,359 --> 00:25:28,903
Still got it.
490
00:25:30,238 --> 00:25:33,074
Okay, good, good,
because there's one thing I, um,
491
00:25:33,074 --> 00:25:34,951
kind of sort of
forgot to mention.
492
00:25:34,951 --> 00:25:37,203
Nothing big,
just this teeny tiny,
493
00:25:37,203 --> 00:25:39,538
but very real prophecy
about the end of the world,
494
00:25:39,538 --> 00:25:41,290
and Billie being
the only one who can save us.
495
00:25:42,625 --> 00:25:44,126
The fate of the world
is in her hands?
496
00:25:45,711 --> 00:25:47,255
Well, technically,
it's in your hands.
497
00:25:48,923 --> 00:25:50,174
You make sure she's ready,
498
00:25:50,174 --> 00:25:52,551
and I'll figure out
what she needs to be ready for.
499
00:25:53,344 --> 00:25:54,553
Thank you.
500
00:25:56,055 --> 00:25:57,056
For everything.
501
00:25:58,015 --> 00:25:59,725
Russos always
have each other's backs.
502
00:26:00,309 --> 00:26:02,311
Well, don't blow it, J-Man.
503
00:26:07,650 --> 00:26:09,485
I've missed this.
504
00:26:15,074 --> 00:26:17,285
"Don't blow it, J-Man."
What'd she mean by that?
505
00:26:18,327 --> 00:26:19,745
Uh, well, I, uh...
506
00:26:20,705 --> 00:26:22,081
I think we should get started.
507
00:26:22,748 --> 00:26:27,044
♪ Everything is not
what it seems ♪
39084
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Javanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish (Latin American)
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof