Original subtitles

[beeping, music]

[upbeat music]

Is this it?

This is amazing.

Yep.

Gretchen, sweetie, what did I tell you

about refreshing your stats?

It's bad for your mental health to just

keep watching them go down and down and down.

You need to focus on the positives in life,

like living in this house with me.

I mean, I guess it's pretty nice.

Yeah, it sure is.

All right, shall we?

Wow, I'm just so excited to be living

in a content house with my two best friends.

[chuckles]

Oh, uh, make sure you put that

through retouch if you plan on posting it.

And actually, can you run it through the Melrose filter first?

Save it, then the sun kiss filter and make sure it's set for natural lighting.

Uh, make sure to set the color temperature to blue.

It brings out the undertones in my face.

No, you know that the blue doesn't look good on me,

just do it for her side.

Huh, Gretchen, are you going to ruin an entire photo

just because you have no undertones?

That's very selfish.

[Gretchen] Oh, for christ's sake, you know what is selfish?

The fact that the last time you posted a picture of us together,

you put the old lady filter on me.

[scoffs]

No, I didn't. You can't blame me just because

you forgot to re-up on your fillers.

[Regina] What did I tell you?

Book an appointment before you leave the office,

that way you're always in the books.

You know what? Forget it, just delete the photo.

Yeah, just delete it.

[Cady] Oh, look at all the natural light in here.

My fans are really gonna thrive.

Yeah, I'm definitely gonna be putting in black out curtains

because I look so much better

with the engagement with movie lighting.

Uh-uh, correction.

Do you really think that's wise?

I mean, with your engagement only at 16%,

should you really be spending your money on curtains?

Excuse me, I'm at 23%.

Oh, I remember that one afternoon,

when I dropped below 30%, I made some really poor

decisions, and I would just hate for you to do the same.

Yeah.

And hey, don't worry, now that we're

all in a content house together,

we can bounce ideas off each other

and all of our numbers will grow.

Yeah.

You know, I heard that

if you have 10 million followers,

that you legally qualify as a celebrity,

and then you don't have to go to jury duty

because you're like a distraction.

I should really look into that because I'm getting close.

I really don't want to go to jury duty.

Hey, guys look at this,

a cool ring light.

The landlord must have really wanted us to feel comfortable here.

Have you not told her?

No, I haven't told her because, um,

we really needed her mom to cover the security deposit,

so I thought it was best she didn't know.

Yeah.

You can tell me and don't worry.

My mom really likes her second job,

so don't feel bad about making her get one to cover our deposit.

[exhales deeply]

Well...

have you ever heard of Jamie Jane?

Umm, no.

Yeah, well, nobody has.

[laughing hysterically]

So who's Jamie Jane?

Well, Jamie Jane was an adult film star.

She was very popular.

She had millions of followers and

she posted about her life every day.

You name it, she posted it,

photos of herself in sexy lingerie,

photos of herself on her exotic

vacations in the Amazon rainforest,

photos of her adorable rescue dog,

photos of the food that she cooked.

Such versatility, wow!

What happened to her?

Well...

for whatever reason...

the algorithm just didn't like her.

So...

she kind of just disappeared.

What do you mean disappeared?

It's like she was there and she was

posting every day, but nobody could see it.

She was invisible.

That doesn't make any sense.

She went from an average of...

20,000 likes to 10,000 likes...

to 5000 likes to zero.

-[Cady] Huh, zero likes? -[inaudible]

That's impossible with millions of followers.

Well...

her lack of popularity on social media

really affected her financially.

She lost all of her sponsorship deals...

and then she stopped getting booked for things.

Sooner or later, she couldn't pay rent.

Well, did she email customer service?

Oh, yeah! Hundreds of times.

Well, what's the point of customer service

if no one ever gets back to you?

I don't know, nobody knows!

Anyway...

after three months of not paying rent,

the landlord finally came by to collect...

and well, when he stopped by here,

all of Jamie's stuff was here, but she was gone.

Let me see, see if I can find her.

Ahh. Okay, I think this is her.

Ugh, no, wait. Okay.

Let me try it with a capital J and a lowercase A.

Okay. All right, I got it.

Oh, my god! Did you seriously just

take the time to write out

her entire name case sensitive?

Huh, you must be exhausted.

You should take a nap.

You guys, there's a post from her today.

Who cares?!

[laughing]

It's really strange.

There's no likes...

and there's only 80 comments

and they're all from this same guy just

repeatedly saying, "Hi."

-So creepy. -So weird.

Well, whatever.

Wherever she is, she better stay there

because, uh, this is our place now.

[laughing]

She's in trouble, maybe we can help.

It doesn't look like she violated any of the terms of service.

She's completely closed.

There's no links to pornographic material.

There's no trademark music. Not even offensive language.

This makes no sense.

Yeah, well, that just sucks for her, she was in porn.

What do you expect?

All of those girls are fucked up.

But her lighting was on point

and her backdrops were fire.

So I guarantee you that if I use them,

my likes and my engagement will skyrocket.

Oh, Gretchen,

such a gemini, always dreaming.

[laughing]

It's so cute.

Well, anyway, I need to get to work.

I have to make a post this afternoon about these teeth whitening strips

and I have no idea how they work.

My dad is a dentist, do you want me to ask him?

Your dad is a dentist?

How many followers does he have?

Like a couple of 100.

I made him an account a few months ago to help him get clients.

That is like direct competition.

You take that account down immediately or

tell your dad to stop being a dentist.

Oh, my god! I didn't even think about that.

Yeah, well, because of that,

I'm gonna use your room as a second closet,

and you can sleep on the couch.

Yeah, it's understandable.

I'm sorry.

Where's that ring light?

It's over there.

No, it's not.

This is a really stupid place to put it.

I don't think I put that there.

Yeah, well, you don't really think.

Um, I know you're like using my suitcase as a tripod,

but can I just get one thing out of it?

No. Do you not see that I'm using this?

Can you think of somebody beside your fucking self?

[exhales deeply]

This fucking thing doesn't work.

[eerie music]

What the fuck?!

What?

[muffled speaking]

Spit that goddamn thing out of your mouth

and pull your fucking pants up.

What are you doing here?

I thought you said we were gonna hang out

once I got your account verified.

I did.

So let's hang out.

Yeah, well, Gretchen's account got

verified the same day.

So how the fuck do you explain that?

I don't know.

Maybe she filled out the form and

applied for it and they got it.

[laughing hysterically]

You believed it.

I can't believe...

What's so funny?

Well, uh, I guess the from started off as an office prank.

It was a joke and people keep falling for it.

The other day, this girl filled out the

entire form with some huge sob story

about a guy on the internet Impersonating her,

and now he has more followers than her.

And he's like actually stalking her.

He's like coming to her house, it's hilarious, right?

Wh- what?

I want Gretchen's check-mark gone.

Well, I got you on the home page.

I...

I even let you post a nipple.

I mean, do you have any idea

how hard that is to push through?

Argh.

Gretchen is my main competition.

You were supposed to get her account suspended.

Getting it verified as like the opposite of that.

Okay, well, I mean when I'm back in the

office on Monday, I can look at it and see what I could do.

Monday? Are you kidding me?

That is like three years from now on internet land.

Okay, by then, she could have like

twice the amount of followers as me.

I don't know what I can do about it right now.

I'm sure you could do something.

You're the big bad boss...

aren't you?

[slaps]

Oh, you like? I'll just make this a little bit tighter.

Okay, okay, okay.

I think, I think I know something I could do.

Yeah? Why don't you show me what you can do?

I can make this tighter.

I'm gonna open up her account.

-Okay, okay. -Oh, there you go.

-There are these photos. -Good boy.

She's not even naked in this one but I'll just

-tag it for nudity, that's close enough. -Yeah. Yeah, that's close enough.

That's close enough, right there. It's just making an aggressive face.

And this one... can't do.

Moving forward right there.

And then this one, [mumbling]

That will put her checkmark up for review,

and then they'll send it to me so I can...

so that I do the reviews, right?

Okay, then submit and send.

Look, look, look.

Huh.

[heavy breathing]

Good boy.

Did I do good?

You did good.

Did I earn some hanky panky spanky?

Yeah, turn around.

[gentle spanking]

-Good boy. -Yeah.

Yeah.

[laughing]

You've been a good boy.

[kissing]

-You want that tighter? -Oh, yeah!

Tighter?

Why don't you...

Yeah, here's the nipples...

that you let me post.

[moaning]

Yeah.

Why would you want to be mean to a nipple?

[sucking]

[moaning]

[gasping]

[moaning]

Oh, you want a cookie?

Oh, yes!

-Oh, you want a treat? -[Zacky] Yeah.

You're a good boy.

I think you deserve a treat.

There you go.

Oh, yeah!

Do you like it?

Yes. Yes.

[gasping]

Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah.

Good boy deserves a treat.

Yes. Yes.

Yeah.

[squealing]

Right there.

Fuck!

[moaning]

[gasping]

Yeah. Yeah.

Oh, my god!

Yes. Yes. Yes.

Yes!

[chuckling]

There you go.

Yes.

Yes, yes, lick that pussy, yes.

[moaning loudly]

[gasping]

Oh, fuck!

Oh, my god!

Come on, come on, lick the pussy, get in there.

Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!

[licking]

[gasping]

[moaning and gasping]

[squeals]

Fuck!

[gasps]

Yeah.

Oh, my god!

Oh, my god! Yeah.

[exhaling deeply]

[gasping]

Yes!

Yes, how does that cookie taste?

I wanna taste.

Yeah.

[giggling]

Yeah.

There you go.

Yeah, right there.

That isn't tight. You like that?

You like that on your cock, right there?

[laughing]

[gagging]

[spits]

Yeah.

Yes! It feels good on the dick like that?

[giggling]

[Regina] Bad boy.

[gasping]

-Just a little bit? -Yeah.

Do you like that?

[Regina] Oh, you like that Zacky, don't you?

-Yeah. -Yes.

See what happens when you pay attention.

[chuckling]

[gasping]

Oh, yeah!

[gagging]

Yeah.

[spitting]

Fuck yeah, yeah, yeah.

[slurp]

[chokes and coughs]

Yeah. Oh, my god! Yes.

That's a good boy.

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!

[gasping]

[slurping]

Yeah.

[slurping]

[Zacky moaning]

You like that?

Um-hum.

[Zacky moaning]

[spitting]

Yes, please.

-Yeah. -Please?

-I'll use you like a little toy. -Yes.

Yes.

[spits]

There you go, Zacky boy.

[spits]

[slaps]

[spits]

Yeah.

[moaning]

Oh, my god!

[moaning]

[gasping]

Shit. Yes. Yes.

-[Zacky moaning] -Oh, yeah!

Shit.

Yeah.

[panting]

-Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! -Yes.

[gasping]

[moaning]

-Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. -Oh, my god! Oh, my god!

Shit.

Oh, my god!

[Zacky groaning]

Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck!

[gasping]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[gasping]

[moaning]

Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Let me ride that fucking cock.

[gasping]

Oh, fuck!

[moaning]

Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck!

[gasping]

[groaning]

Yes!

[gasping]

Yes! Yes!

[moaning]

-[Regina] Yeah! -[Zacky] Oh, yeah!

[Zacky] Yeah.

[panting]

-[Regina] Oh, yeah! -Oh, yeah!

[panting]

-Oh, lord, this is deep. -[Zacky] Yeah?

[Regina] Oh, yeah!

[spits]

-[Regina] Yeah? -[Zacky] Oh, yes!

[moaning]

[moaning and gasping]

[Regina] Oh, yeah! There you go.

[Regina] Yeah, right there, right there, yes.

[gasping]

-Oh, yeah? -[Regina] Yeah. Yeah.

[panting]

Oh, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck!

[moaning loudly]

[moaning and gasping]

[Regina] Oh, my god! Oh, my god!

[moaning loudly]

[Regina] Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!

[squealing]

[gasping]

Oh, my god!

Yeah.

[panting]

Yeah.

[heavy breathing]

[gasping and moaning]

Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!

Fuck!

Oh, my god!

Oh, my god!

Oh, my god! Fuck! Fuck!

[moaning]

[gasping]

[squealing] Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!

[moaning]

[gasping]

[panting]

[spitting]

Yes!

Oh, fuck, yeah!

[gentle spanking]

[Zacky panting]

[Zacky moaning]

[spits]

[gagging]

[spits]

Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

[moaning]

Oh, my god!

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!

[gasping]

[moaning]

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

[moaning]

Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!

[gasping]

Yeah. Yeah.

[squeals]

[chuckling]

Yes, fuck yes. Fuck yes.

Oh, right there. I want you to fuck me, fuck me.

[moaning]

[breathing heavily]

Oh, yeah! Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!

Oh, yeah! Yeah!

Yes, yes, yes!

[panting]

[moaning]

[exhaling deeply]

Yeah. Yeah.

[moaning]

[Regina] Oh, yeah!

[chuckling]

Oh, fuck!

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!

[panting]

[Zacky groaning]

Yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah!

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.

[moaning]

[panting]

Yeah, it feels really good.

[chuckling]

Yeah.

Yes. Oh, yeah! Yeah.

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!

Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck!

[gasping]

-[Regina] Get in my pussy. -[Zacky] Yes.

-[Regina] Yeah. -[Zacky] Yes.

[Regina] Yeah. Yeah.

[moaning]

Yeah.

[gasping]

[panting]

-Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. -[Zacky breathing heavily]

[moaning]

Oh, my god!

Yeah.

[panting]

Yeah. Fuck yeah, fuck yeah.

[moaning loudly]

[Zacky groaning]

Fuck!

Yeah!

[heavy breathing]

Yeah.

[panting]

-Whoa! -Yeah.

-Let me taste that pussy. -Yes!

[slurping]

[Zacky exhaling deeply]

[gagging]

[Zacky groaning]

[gagging]

Oh, fuck, yes!

[gagging]

[groaning]

[gentle spanking]

[Zacky moaning]

[spits]

Yeah! Yeah!

[moaning]

[heavy breathing]

Oh, you want pussy?

Yeah.

[Regina] Yeah.

[chuckling]

Yeah. Yeah.

[gasping and moaning]

[Zacky] Yeah. Yeah.

[gasping]

Yeah. Yeah.

[moaning]

[Regina] Yeah.

[panting]

Oh, fuck! Yeah.

[Zacky] Yeah.

Yeah.

You bad boy.

Fuck yeah. Fuck yeah.

Oh, my god!

Yeah, make me cum.

[ragged breathing]

[both moaning]

Oh, my god! Oh, my god!

[moaning]

[panting]

Yes Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!

Yes!

[moaning]

[Zacky groaning]

[both moaning]

Yeah, right there, right there.

[moaning]

[Regina] Oh, fuck!

[heavy breathing]

[gasping]

[groaning]

[Zacky moaning]

[moaning]

[Regina] Yeah.

[Regina] Yeah. Yeah.

[moaning]

[gasps]

Oh, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck!

[panting]

[Regina] Fuck yeah.

[moaning]

[both moaning]

[gasping]

Oh, yeah!

Yes. Yes.

Right there.

Yeah. Whoa!

Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes.

Oh, fuck!

Bad boy.

[moaning]

[Regina] Oh, yeah! Oh, yeah!

[moaning]

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

[gentle spanking]

Yeah.

Yeah.

[Zacky] Yes.

[moaning]

Yeah!

Oh, shit!

[moaning]

[heavy breathing]

[moaning]

-You wanna get on top of me now? -Yeah.

[Zacky] Bounce that ass just like that.

[Zacky] Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes.

[moaning]

[heavy breathing]

[groaning]

Oh, fuck!

[gasping and moaning]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Oh, fuck! Yes!

Fuck my pussy like that.

Like that, like that.

[moaning loudly]

-Yeah. -[Zacky] Yeah.

[gasping]

[spits]

[spitting]

[heavy breathing]

Yeah.

[panting]

[choking]

[spitting]

Yes.

-Do you want it fucking pulled like that? -Yeah.

[spitting]

[giggling]

Whoa!

You want me to spank you like that?

[gasping]

[panting]

[Zacky moaning]

Fuck yeah.

[gurgling]

[spitting]

[Zacky moaning]

Yeah.

[heavy breathing]

[spitting]

Oh, yeah!

[spitting]

Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah.

[heavy breathing]

You wanna cum insude me?

-Oh, yeah? -Oh, yeah.

-You want to cum inside? -Oh, yes!

-Yes, please. -You're are like really rich.

Maybe if I had your baby or something one day,

then I'll be really rich too.

And I'd really like that.

If I verify the account too?

Yeah.

Get lots of verified accounts,

-then you'll be mine forever. -Oh, yeah!

You like that I'm really rich?

Yes. Yes.

Yeah.

Yep, yep.

[gasping]

-Yeah. Yeah. -Anything you want.

-Anything you want. -[Regina] Yeah?

Yes.

-Yes. -[Regina] Yeah.

[Regina] Oh, fuck!

[Zacky] Yeah. Yeah.

-Yeah. -[Zacky] Yeah.

[gasps]

[moaning]

[Regina] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Regina] Yes.

[Regina] Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!

[Regina] Yeah. Yeah.

Yes, yes, yes. Yeah.

[gasping]

Yeah!

Yes, right there.

[Regina] Yeah.

-[Regina] Give me all your fucking cum. -[Zacky] Yeah.

[Regina] Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!

[Regina] Oh, god!

[gasping]

-[Zacky] Yeah. -Oh, my god!

[Zacky moaning]

[moaning]

Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck!

Yeah!

[gasping]

[giggling]

[squealing]

Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!

[Regina] Oh, that's it. Right there. Yeah.

[moaning]

[panting]

[moaning]

Oh, yeah!

[Zacky] Yeah.

[Zacky moaning]

[moaning]

[gasping]

Oh, yeah! I know.

Yeah. Oh, yeah!

You love nipples

but you also just really hate them too.

[gasping]

-[Regina] Fcuk, cum inside me, cum inside me. -[Zacky] Oh, yes, yes.

[Regina] Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

[Regina] Yes, baby!

-[Regina] Yeah. -[Zacky moaning]

[moaning]

[Regina] Yeah.

[gasping]

-[Zacky moaning] -[gasping]

[gasping]

[slurping and licking]

[slurping]

[Zacky moaning]

[chuckles]

[exhaling deeply]

Can you give me another suitcase?

This isn't the right height for this angle.

Here, I'll just do it for you.

Can you do a better job than the suitcase?

[chuckles]

[Cady] Okay, hold that pose.

What the fuck is this?

Trust me, plants really bring up engagement.

[clicks]

See, look, it's cute.

What the hell did you do?

I know right, the plant really brings out your soul.

No, my verification has gone, four photos got deleted.

What the fuck did you do?

Listen, Gretchen, I just had the camera open.

I didn't even have the app open, okay.

It's your fucking plant.

Really didn't do anything wrong.

You know what? Just take your bad energy and vibes away from here.

I'll just do it myself.

Don't even think about it.

[exhales deeply]

Oh, my god! It's gone.

That was fast.

[laughing]

Gretchen is gonna be so pissed.

I bet she paid somebody so much money

for that verification mark.

What a fucking idiot.

Now you see what your Zacky bear can do for you?

Soon she's going to be a broke nobody,

just like Jamie Jane.

I mean, I wouldn't go that far.

Jamie did porn.

Those whores are so easy to make disappear.

Oh, yeah, you're right.

[laughing]

This old house needs fixing.

Do you know an electrician?

What the fuck is going on? Can you...

Uh...

[Regina] Oh, my god!

-[screaming] -Oh, my god!

[music]