All language subtitles for The Last Drive-In with Joe Bob Briggs S30E02 Late Night with the Devil 1080p WEB-DL AAC2 0 H 264-BFM_track3_[eng]

-Welcome back to
"Joe Bob's Beelzebub Bash",

our double feature tribute
to the "de-vil", the Evil One,

which has always been
a staple of screenwriters.

When I think of great devils
on film,

there's two that immediately
come to mind for me.

One is, of course, Al Pacino,

who, you know, he decided to go
big in "Devil's Advocate".

He's even crazier as Satan

than he was as Tony Montana
in "Scarface", in my opinion.

And then -- What --
What is he trying to do?

He's trying to get Keanu Reeves
to Aardvark with his half sister

so she can give birth
to the Antichrist.

Isn't that what he's doing?

Anyway, I can't remember.

But then the opposite
of that performance

is Vincent Price
in "The Story of Mankind",

also a lawyer, though.

I wonder how many times the
devil has been cast as a lawyer.

But he's well-dressed
and logical,

and he's prosecuting mankind
in a cosmic courtroom,

arguing that we're all hopeless,

presenting examples
from throughout human history.

And Vincent Price loves it,
though,

whenever the judge
declares him to be out of order.

So, do you have a favorite
film portrayal of Satan?

-Does Darkness in "Legend"
count?

'Cause they don't really come
out and say that he's the devil,

but I mean, come on,
he's, like, red with horns.

-Tim Curry trying
to destroy the unicorns.

I mean, how vile can you get?

-Exactly. Right.

But we need to give
an honorable mention

to Liz Hurley in "Bedazzled",

'cause last time we
talked about female Satans,

you left her out,
even though I warned you.

-Uh-huh.
-On the record, I warned him.

I got so much hate mail
for leaving her out.

So, Liz Hurley in "Bedazzled".

-Alright, Darcy, the Mail Girl,
ladies and gentlemen.

Here, as always,
to field your questions,

your comments, your pertinent
philosophical remarks.

Tweet with her, Insta her,
e-mail her,

let her know you're here,
and tell us what you think

about our second movie tonight.

I think this is the first time
that we have ever shown

a brand new movie
on "The Last Drive-In" --

a movie released in the same
year that we're showing it.

-I don't know that
that's "brand new".

-Well, okay, it's pretty new.

"Late Night with the Devil",
very popular on Shudder.

Made something like
10 million bucks

at the Box Office domestic,
8 million overseas.

Third highest grossing
IFC release of all time

when it was released
this past spring.

And the star of that film,
David Dastmalchian,

is an old friend
of "The Last Drive-In".

He was with us for the season 5
Lucio Fulci tribute,

which ironically,
was a fake late night talk show.

And so, you know,

when he comes out here
to join us later tonight,

we can ask him
whether he's made a decision

to do fake talk shows
as a long-term career strategy.

Anyway, here's my question
about

"Late Night with the Devil",
though.

And that is...is the devil
really in the movie?

Chime in on that
after we've watched it tonight,

and if you haven't seen it,

you'll have to wait
to see what I'm talking about.

But I'm not sure
that the actual devil appears.

Anyway, here's my take on the
whole "is the devil real" thing.

I don't believe in
the Al Pacino devil,

or the Vincent Price devil,

or the unicorn
destroying Tim Curry devil.

I believe in the
Warner Brothers cartoons devil.

And I'll tell you,
and by that I do not mean

the actual Tasmanian devil,

although I greatly admire Taz,

especially when he goes on the
Looney Tunes Christmas specials.

Remember, he would eat Santa's
sleigh and all the presents.

I love that particular episode.
Anyway...

No, what I mean by the
Warner Brothers cartoons devil

is the one that --

the devil that appears
in the little bubble

above the character's shoulder

when the character is trying
to make a moral choice,

you know, angel bubble
over the right shoulder,

devil bubble
over his left shoulder.

And that's what
the devil is really like,

'cause that bubble comes from
inside the character's head,

right?

The devil is your lying mind,

not the part of your brain
that lies to other people,

but the part of your brain
that lies to yourself.

So you're saying,
"You know, I can do this,

and I will still be
a good person".

And that's the devil --
the devil bubble talking.

But the angel bubble
is popping up and saying,

"Not really, you're an asshole".

But angels are you.

And you can't make the --
you can't make

the not really devil shut up,
you know?

So when you choose
the devil bubble,

you have given in to the devil,
which is you,

which is selfishness,
'cause, you know,

it all comes down
to selfishness.

What is every crime?
Selfishness.

Serial killing? Selfishness.

Because some guy says,
"I wonder what her head

would look like on a stick".

And the angel bubble --

The angel bubble
is all over that.

The angel bubble is going,
"Fuck you".

[Stammers] And --
But you're saying,

"Fuck you, angel bubble,
I'm going to get her head

on a stick", 'cause --
'cause selfish, you know?

And so that's my concluding
remarks on cognitive psychology,

behavioral meta ethics,

epistemology,
and moral philosophy.

The answer is Bugs Bunny
bubbles.

[Laughter]

That's where you find Satan.

Do you agree with that, Darcy?

-I would not really say
Bugs Bunny.

-Who would you say?
-For, like, the angel,

we would do Tweety, right?

-Tweety bird?
-Tweety's much nicer than Bugs.

-You think Tweety Bird
sits at the moral center

of the Warner Brothers
cartoon universe?

-Yes, I do.
-Okay.

Yeah, well, maybe Bugs Bunny
is wrong, 'cause we can't --

I mean, we can't use
Wile E. Coyote either,

'cause he would always choose
the devil bubble, but...

[Laughter]

Porky Pig.
-Oh.

-Porky Pig bubbles.
Would you go with Porky?

-Yes, I would.
-Okay, Porky Pig bubbles.

Look there and you will find
the means of vanquishing evil.

And, uh, I'm not really clear
on what we just did

or what I just said, but anyway.
-I don't either.

So let's introduce the movie.
-Alright. Let's do it.

What we have here
is the sensitive story

of a late '70s TV host,
Jack Delroy,

whose late night
talk show "Night Owls"

just can't quite equal
Johnny Carson in the ratings,

no matter what Jack does.

And he's got one last shot
at avoiding cancellation

during Sweeps week.

So he's invited
a psychic medium,

a professional debunker
of psychic mediums,

a girl rescued
from a devil-worshipping cult,

and the parapsychologist
who wrote a book about her,

all to be guests on a very
special Halloween episode.

Sure, we've seen it before,
but have we seen it

with a giant worm sprouting
from the eye

of the Ed McMahon-like sidekick?

I think not.

Let's take a look
at those Drive-In Totals.

We have five dead bodies
head splitting,

neck breaking,
throat slitting, face melting,

one gut full of worms,

ritual dagger stabbing,
projectile spewing,

glass shattering,
one satanic private men's club,

one reanimated,
tragically deceased wife,

gratuitous '70s history montage,
gratuitous opening monologue,

gratuitous theremin,
eye rolls,

demon possession fu,
levitation fu.

Drive-In Academy Award
nominations

for Rhys Auteri as Gus,

the talk show sidekick
for saying,

"You're meddling in things
you don't understand",

Ian Bliss as the skeptic
Carmichael Haig

for impressive feats
of hypnotism

and for asking, "Is this a talk
show or a fucking freak show?",

Ingrid Torelli as the possessed
girl Lilly

for being super freaky

and for telling Jack, "I think
you're going to be famous soon",

David Dastmalchian
as the desperate last night --

late night talk show host
Jack Delroy for saying,

"If Earth swallows us up,
I apologize in advance",

and the Cairnes Brothers,
Cameron and Colin,

the directors and writers,

for doing things
the Drive-In way.

Four stars.
Joe Bob says check it out.

And, you know,

we were talking
in the last movie

about all the professional
Satan worshippers out there.

And we were talking
about the Church of Satan.

There's the Church of Satan,
that's the first one.

And then there's
the Temple of Satan.

That's the one in
Salem, Massachusetts

that wants to -- they want
to say the opening prayer

at the Boston City Council
meeting.

They're pissed
'cause they're like,

"How come the Catholics
and Protestants

get to pray
and we don't get to pray?"

And they actually filed
a lawsuit.

And then there's
the Reformed Church of Satan,

which is some guy in Michigan
who has a beef

with the Zander Lafitte
descendants in Poughkeepsie.

They moved to Poughkeepsie
for the [Laughs]

for the Church of Satan.

But the ones that really
fascinate me

are the Luciferians, okay?

They're based on an island
in Denmark.

And they never say
the word "Satan".

They only say "Lucifer".

And what they like
about Lucifer is that he's hot.

-[Laughter]
I mean, well, I mean,

every version of the devil
is hot because of the whole,

you know,
fire and brimstone thing.

But, I mean,
Lucifer is uber handsome, hot.

You know, they put up naked
pictures of his musculature,

if you know what I mean.

And I think you do.
-I think I do.

-You know, I love Denmark.
You know, the Danes...

The Danes are nine kinds
of crazy,

but always in a good way.

The Danes, you know,
first of all, I love the Danes

'cause the Danes
are never going to nuke anybody.

The Danes are never going to
cause any international trouble.

They're Vikings, you know.

They raped
and pillaged back in the day,

but now they're Milo Vikings,
you know.

They're having Viking sex,
and they're smoking Viking weed.

You know, hashish
is what they do over there.

[Stammers]
They love the hashish.

But they're not going to spear
anybody through the scrotum

like they would have done
at one time.

You know, they're too busy

worshipping Lucifer's...
musculature.

Anyway...
-You're done now?

-I think I'm done. Yeah.
-Okay, good.

Where did that come from?
-I don't know.

-I don't know either.
-[Laughter]

[Harmonica plays]

[Instrumental music plays]

♪

[Eerie music plays]

♪

[Slow tempo music plays]

♪

[Bird chirping]

[Dark ambient music plays]

♪

[Instrumental music plays]

♪

♪

[Doom metal plays]

♪

[Dark ambient music plays]

♪

[TV static]

[Indistinct shouting on TV]

[Rock music plays]

-Mindless violence lit up
the sky.

-America -- the 1970's.

-The energy crisis is real.

-A time of unrest and mistrust.

-I have never been a quitter.
-[Siren wails]

-It was a night of terror.

-A time of fear and violence.

-We are entering
a satanic age.

Anyone who can't see that
is...

-Television documents
the chaos,

beams the horror
into our living room.

-And so it is done.

-But it also offers comfort.
-[Jazz music plays]

April 4, 1971,
the first episode

of UBC's "Night Owls"
goes to air.

The network's hopes
for a late night hit

are riding on the shoulders
of the host,

a popular Chicago
radio announcer.

-Good evening, Night Owls.

I'm your host, Jack Delroy,

and thank you for allowing me
into your living rooms

for the first of what I hope
will be many, many shows.

[Chuckles]

I'd like to thank everyone

who helped bring this dream
to life,

especially my dear mom and dad
back in Berwyn, Illinois,

who I know are sitting
in front of their TV set,

big smiles on their faces,
watching "The Tonight Show"

with Johnny Carson.

[Laughter, applause]

-With its entertaining mix
of interviews,

music, and sketch comedy,

"Night Owls" with Jack Delroy
captures the hearts and minds

of midnight America.

[Cheers and applause]

-Well, I am sick of the crog,
stuck in the cave all day

cooking your saber tooth stew.

-Wait, fellas,
does this sound familiar?

-This is an Amazonian
bird-eating spider.

-Looks like
your furry little friend

might have gotten
a better offer.

-[Woman screaming in distance]

-Don't panic. I got it, Jack.
I gotta -- Excuse me, sir.

-Five nights a week,

Jack helps an anxious nation
forget its troubles.

-[Laughing]

-In November 1972,

Jack inks a five year deal with
UBC owner Walker Bedford.

-Welcome to the UBC family.

-What did you have to sacrifice
to get here tonight?

-With an Emmy nomination
to his name

and growing audience share,

Jack's sights are set
on the coveted late night crown.

By Jack's side
through everything

is his wife, the beloved
stage actress Madeleine Piper.

Despite Jack's relentless quest
to be number one,

they are considered
one of showbiz's

happiest and most enduring
couples.

Madeleine is his muse
and his confidante,

but she is not his only source
of support.

Jack's association
with The Grove,

a men-only club located
in the redwoods of California,

has been the subject of rumors
since his days in radio.

Established in the 1800's

and counting
among its members --

politicians, entertainers,
and captains of industry --

The Grove has long
portrayed itself

as a harmless summer camp
for the rich and powerful.

[Men howling]

-But speculation swirls around
its taste for arcane ceremony

and its power to make
and break careers.

[Audience counting down]
...8, 7...

-Four seasons on, and ratings
still fail to match Carson.

-[Instruments playing]
-[Laughter]

The nominations mount,
but no trophy.

Jack's reputation as perennial
also ran starts to bite.

He knows that history
remembers only kings.

Then, in September 1976,

Jack's world is turned
upside down

when Madeleine,
a nonsmoker,

is diagnosed
with terminal lung cancer.

In October, Madeleine makes a
special appearance on the show.

-[Weakly] Jack and I first met

when I was doing "Oh! Calcutta!"
at the Eden.

My, you should have seen him...
blush when he came backstage,

and [Inhales deeply]
was confronted

with all those glorious
naked bodies.

Remember, darling?
-Madeleine, I don't think

we need to talk --
-See?

He's blushing right now.
-[Laughter]

How's a girl not supposed
to fall in love with that?

[Audience exclaims]

-Isn't she something,
ladies and gentlemen?

-It is the highest rating
episode

in "Night Owl's" history,

but still falls a point short
of Carson.

[Cheers and applause]

[Quietly] I love you, Jack.

-[Mouths]
-[Solemn music plays]

-Two weeks later,
Madeleine is dead.

[Sinister music plays]

[Camera shutter clicking]

A grieving Jack shuns the media.

He flees New York,
his location unknown.

Just one month later,
and to the surprise of many,

UBC announces his return.

-Ladies and gentlemen,
Mr. Jack Delroy.

[Cheers and applause]

-But the gap between Delroy
and Carson continues to widen.

Jack and his longtime producer,
Leo Fisk,

go out of their way
to court controversy

in a bid to improve
audience share.

[Indistinct shouting]

-You used to be the [Bleep] man,
Jack.

What the [Bleep] happened
to you?

Huh?

-We are going to take a break,
and I'll --

I'll be right back.
You will not.

-Where the [Bleep]
do you think you're going?

Huh?
-Open the [Bleep] door!

-Ratings are in freefall.
Sponsors are nervous.

Jack's contract is set
to expire.

Everything is on the line
when Sweeps week begins

on Halloween night, 1977.

-[Speaks in French]

-A desperate Jack
plans an episode

he hopes will turn
his fortunes around.

-Let's get the audience in,
guys.

-What you are about to see

is the recently discovered
master tape

of what went to air
that night,

as well as previously unreleased
behind the scenes footage.

It is the live TV event
that shocked the nation.

"Late Night with the Devil".

-Tonight's
broadcast is brought to you

by the Cavendish Group
of companies.

Let's shake on it.

-[Cheers and applause]
-Live from UBC Studios

in New York City,

it's "Night Owls"
with Jack Delroy.

Joining us on our spooky
Halloween special,

Christou, Carmichael Haig,

Dr. June Ross-Mitchell
with the subject

of her new book, Lilly,

Miss Cleo James
with a bewitching jazz medley,

plus our annual
Halloween costume parade.

But now here's Mr. Midnight,
Jack Delroy!

[Cheers and applause]

[Laughs] Oh, boy.

Jack?

[Laughs]

Where the hell is he?
-[Laughter]

Uh... Jack, you're on.

Leo, He's not...
Oh! Jesus, Mary, and Joseph!

-[Laughs]
-[Growls]

[Laughs]

[Cheers and applause]

-Gus McConnell,
ladies and gentlemen.

-[Cheers and applause]
-[Laughs] You.

-Oh, good evening, Night Owls,
and thank you for allowing me

into your living rooms
once again.

We've got an incredible show
lined up for you tonight

as we celebrate all of
the fiendish fun of Halloween.

Ooooh. Oh, hello.
-[Theremin plays]

Um, what do you got there, Gus?

-A theremin, Jack.
It's a musical instrument.

-Oh, that's not music, Gus.

That is actually the sound
you get

when you're tuning
your car radio

searching for music.
-[Laughter]

-What's interesting
about a theremin,

Jack, is you play it
without touching it.

-So you're not meant
to touch it?

-No, sir. No touching.

-Why, Gus, if only you'd shown
the same restraint

at the Melody Burlesque
after Friday's show.

-[Laughter, applause]
-[Theremin stops playing]

We should raise the bar in here
a little bit tonight, folks.

Um, anybody go to
the Yankees parade?

-[Cheering]
Yeah!

Any Reggie Jackson fans in here?

-[Cheering, applause]
Knew she was.

Now, there's a rumor
going around

thatCosmomagazine
has approached Reggie

to be their very own
Mr. October.

-[Audience exclaims]
We can expect Reggie's

impressive home run spree
to continue

well into the off season.
-[Laughter, applause]

-One more. Hey! Oh!
That one went over the fence.

Whew. [Laughs]
-I don't get that joke.

-Oh, well.
-[Laughter]

I guess we're gonna
have to raise the bar

to Gus's standards now, folks.
Uh, yeah.

So apparently
President Jimmy Carter...

Really, Leo? You -- [Stammers]
Well, okay.

Easy pickings, I guess.

Um, so President Carter
held a press conference today

announcing
a reorganization of his staff.

When asked if his brother Billy
was part of the plans,

the president said
that he'd offered Billy a chance

to head either the FBI --

is this true? --
or the CIA. Wow.

Apparently, Billy said
he refused to head any agency

that he couldn't spell.

-[Laughter, applause]
-[Rimshot]

-I get that joke.
-You got it?

He got it. Gus got it.
-[Laughs]

-Well, Night Owls,
we've got a heck of a show

in store for you tonight,
and I'm very excited

for you to see it all unfold
before your very eyes.

I really hope you love it.

Gosh, I hope you love it.

Please love it because,
well, it's...

[Spookily] Sweeps week.
-[Instruments play spooky sound]

Ohhh! That's right!

Where is Vincent Price
when you need him?

Boy, I tell you what.

Now Sweeps week,
as we all know,

is the all important
national ratings period.

But, hey,
do I look nervous to you, Gus?

-You better believe it, Jack.
-[Laughter]

-We all know
how important it is

to keep our sponsors
and affiliates happy.

But in my humble opinion,
there is only one person

who really matters in
this whole darn crazy business.

-Well, thank you, Jack.
-And that is you, our viewers.

You have stood by me
through thick and thin,

good times and bad.

Especially the bad.

It was your support that...

brought me back
into this very studio

a year ago, when I could
have easily thrown in the towel,

when many suggested that I
should have thrown in the towel.

This show is,
and it always has been for you.

-We love you, Jack!
-[Audience exclaims]

-Leo, can we please get that
woman and Nielsen viewing diary?

Come on.
-[Laughter]

-Thank you all.

What do you say, Night Owls?
On with the show, huh?

-Yeah!
-[Applause]

-Interest in the occult

has seen a major revival,
in recent years.

This is true --
you open any newspaper today,

you're going to see
hundreds of ads

for psychics or fortune tellers.

Exorcists, even. Whoa!

Now, as you know,
here on "Night Owls",

we think it's very important
to keep an open mind.

Our first guest tonight --
I am so excited

about this young man --

is a shining light
in this movement.

Some call him a medium,
others, a spiritualist.

Some have even called him
a miracle worker.

We know him by one name.

And well, that's probably
because one name

is all he seems to have.

Ladies and gentlemen,
please help me welcome

the mysterious,
the mononymous Christou.

[Cheers and applause]

[Instrumental music plays]

[Music stops]

Thank you for being here.
So it is just Christou.

Is that right?
-Si. That is correct.

Thank you for inviting me
onto your program.

-Oh, pl--
Thank you for taking time out

of your busy touring schedule.

You are a hot ticket these days,

I tell you what.
-It is my pleasure.

-Now, as I understand it,
a night like tonight,

a spooky night like Halloween,

holds a special significance
for someone in your profession.

-That is correct.

All Hallows Eve is a time

to break open the doors
to the underworld.

It is the last chance for the
spirits of the recently deceased

to attend to any
unfinished business.

-Ooh.
-So that explains

the significance, then,
of the Halloween masks.

-Si. Yes. We use them
to hide from the angry spirits.

-[Laughter]
-I'm so curious.

Do you hear these voices
of the dead

all the time?

-The energy is ever present
here.

-And then I guess
the burning question

is how the hell do you get
any sleep?

-[Laughter]
-I mean, right?

-But just think of my mind
like the ham radio,

picking up frequencies
in the airwaves.

When I no longer want to listen,

I simply switch it off.
[Snaps fingers]

-Just like that?
[Snaps fingers] Wow.

Okay, well, then, I think it is
time, ladies and gentlemen,

that we fire up
those frequencies.

-The energy in here
is very strong.

-Thank you, Phil.
The floor is yours, sir.

Ladies and gentlemen,
Christou.

[Cheers and applause]

-Oh.

I'm already receiving
some signals here.

[Breathing shakily]

[Grunts]

The letter "P" I'm hearing.

Peter.

Pete.

No, wait.
It's clearer now.

Peterson.
I'm hearing the name Peterson.

-Peterman?
-What? I'm sorry.

-Sir. You're up there.

Yeah. Okay, okay, sir.
You can stand up back there.

Thank you. Hi.
Mr. Peterson.

-Uh, no. Uh, my wife's
maiden name was Peterman.

-Yes, that is it. Peterman.
She's in the room with us now.

-She is?
-Your wife has crossed over.

Si.
-You could say that.

She ran off
with my neighbor five years ago.

[Laughter]

-Sorry to hear that.
-Oh. Don't be.

My golf game's never been
better.

[Laughter]

-No, but there is a --

Now I'm hearing the name
Elizabeth.

-No, her name was Helen.

-There was no Beth or Betty?
-Correct.

-There was a Betty.
-No.

You're correct.
There was no Beth or Betty.

-I mean, starting with "B".
-Oh, my name's Barry.

-That's not it.
-No, it has been for 42 years.

[Laughter]

-Gone. The spirit has passed.
I'm sorry.

Sometimes the signal
gets scrambled.

Studio lights, cameras...
I am only a messenger.

I concentrate.
-Barry, have a seat.

Thank you so much.
-Thank you.

-And you, sir.

Looks like you went on a
shopping spree with Gus

down at, uh, Barney's
Discount Costume Warehouse, huh?

-[Laughter]
Got quite a steal on that, huh?

Don't be upset.
I'm just ribbing you.

[Laughter]

Oh, yeah.

-I'm receiving something.

I'm getting a...Oh, yes.
This intrigues.

Good evening, ladies.
-Evening.

-[Women giggle]

-Who is...Edward?

Eddy?

He was a son or brother
for one of you. Si.

-Edmund was my little brother.

-And you were the mother, si?

-Si. I mean, yes.
[Chuckles]

-Deduction, Jack,
not psychic powers.

-I am still impressed.
-[Laughter]

-Something bad
happened to Edmund.

It's...hard to talk about it.

-Yes.
-Many questions remain.

-Well...
-It may be that Edmund

took his own life,
quite recently, too.

-Five years ago.
-I know,

but it feels like
only yesterday.

Such a terrible tragedy.

There was much confusion
why he did this.

No, terrible sadness
and confusion.

This is so...
-There's no note. Nothing.

-You know,
he was such a happy boy.

None of us knew
he was in so much pain.

-Eddie wants you to know
that he is at peace now.

He's sorry for the suffering
he has caused.

He communicates this to you.

His heart is full of love.

[Chuckles]

Now I'm hearing the word papa.

-Well, dad was always dad.
We never --

-No, wait. Um...

[Sniffles]
When Edmund was little,

he had a teddy named Papa.

-This is true.

-I remember.

-I kept all these things.
[Sniffles]

Can you please tell him
that Papa is safe?

-I do not need to tell him this.

He already knows.

[Audience exclaims]

Thank you.

You are both so beautiful.

Bless you. Bless you all.

-Wow!
-[Cheers and applause]

Wow!

Wow! What a gift.

Thank you. Christou. Wow!

Now, his tour dates
should be showing up

on your screens momentarily.

We're going to have to take
a quick break, folks.

When we come back, though,

one of the old friends
of our show --

-[Shouting in pain]
-Oh, my God!

-[Shouting continues]

-Christou?

-Something very intense here.
[Gasping, grunting]

-Perhaps...Are we getting
another message from Edmund?

-No, no, this is...
[Shouting]

[Audience exclaims]

I'm getting the name...Minnie.

Does anyone here know a Minnie?

Please accept.

-Does this name mean anything
to anyone in the studio?

No? Um, perhaps a name
that sounds like Minnie?

Maybe it's, like,
a Milly or a Mandy.

-I had a great Aunt Molly.
-It's Minnie!

Please!
Who will accept?!

So much sadness.

I see...a wedding ring.

An unmarried man
with a wedding ring.

The spirit needs to talk to you.

Who are you?!

[Electricity crackling]

-It's okay, folks, just
our old park hands acting up.

-[Breathing heavily]

-Gone.

She's gone. [Breathes shakily]

Sh-- Sh-- She's gone.

-Leo.

We're going to take
a quick break,

and we're going to be
right back after these messages.

-[Cheers and applause]
-[Instrumental music plays]

-Let me just say
this movie is already remarkable

for its evocation of 1970's
cheesy late night television,

especially because they didn't
just ape "The Tonight Show".

They dug into the history
of failed talk shows

and created the vibe of shows
that were chasing Johnny Carson.

You know,
people who came of age after,

I don't know, 1972,
probably don't have any idea

of what an immovable object
Johnny Carson was in late night.

So, so much so that the
other networks didn't even try

to compete against him.

Um, Jimmy Fallon, the current
host of "The Tonight Show",

averages
about 1.3 million viewers.

Johnny Carson averaged
15 million.

In 1969, he had a show
that captured 85%

of the available
viewing public --

45 million people.

That was the night that Tiny Tim
married Miss Vicky on the air.

And then for Carson's
final show in 1992,

he topped that record
with 55 million viewers.

Those were unheard of numbers.

And to give you some idea,
the World Series that year,

only 30 million viewers
average each night.
-What? That's crazy.

-So anyway, most people don't
remember all the competitors

that constantly came and went
in various efforts

to grab some of that late night
audience.

In fact, I was a guest
on one of those shows.

I was on "The Pat Sajak Show".

-Oh, I'm finding that.
I'm finding that.

-1989.
-I'll find it.

-Okay.

I remember it was
on a brand new soundstage

that CBS built just for Pat
in Television City,

that big studio
at Beverly and Fairfax in LA.

The show lasted
less than a year,

and Pat went back
to "Wheel of Fortune",

and that was that.

But Sajak wasn't the only guy
who tried

to fight the heavyweight
champion of the world.

Joan Rivers did it.

And Carson never talked to her
again.

Regis Philbin, Jerry Lewis
had a late night talk show.

David Brenner, Alan Thicke,
Ron Reagan, Dennis Miller,

David Frost, Bill Dana,
Les Crane.

For many years,
Dick Cavett had a show

that was sort of considered
almost equal

to "The Tonight Show",
but it eventually floundered

because it was thought of
as intellectually highbrow.

It's a show
where William Buckley

called Gore Vidal a name,
a gay slur that I can't say.

-I was like, what name?
-I can't say...

I can't say it on the air.

And...
-I got it.

Yeah, and Georgia Governor
Lester Maddox

stormed off the stage
and refused to come back on.

So actually
not very intellectual

'cause it had scenes like that.
-[Laughter]

But maybe Cavett himself
was too cerebral

for a general audience.

And then there were
other strong shows

that went up against Carson --
Steve Allen...

Arsenio Hall.
-Ooh! Ooh!

-[Laughs] Exactly.
Joey Bishop, Merv Griffin.

But none of them, zero, ever
topped Carson in the ratings.

Okay, so this is rich material

for "Late Night with the Devil"
to work with,

but none of those shows
that I just mentioned

were the inspiration
for "Night Owls",

the fictional show
hosted by Jack Delroy.

The writers of this movie,
when they created it,

we're thinking
of "The Don Lane Show"

and also shows hosted by
Graham Kennedy and Bert Newton.

-Who?
-[Laughs] Exactly.

-Who the fuck is Don Lane?

-Don Lane
had a late night show

that ran for nine seasons
in Australia.

-Oh, okay.
-And then Kennedy and Newton

were also Australian
talk show hosts.

And that's because
this entire movie is Australian.

It was written and directed
by Cameron and Colin Cairnes,

the Cairnes Brothers, who grew
up in the suburbs of Brisbane.

And they're responsible
for two other horror movies

that this audience would
probably be familiar with --

"100 Bloody Acres"
and "Scare Campaign".

But the reason that
they have this uncanny ability

to recreate American
late night television

so accurately
is that all the American shows,

including Johnny Carson,
were shown in Australia.

So they knew all our stuff,

but we didn't know
any of their stuff.

And by the way, congratulations
to all the actors in this movie.

Their American accents
are so spot on

that I didn't even know
they were Australian.

But every actor in the movie is
Australian except for the lead,

David Dastmalchian,

who will be out here
in just a few minutes

to entertain us
with behind the scenes trivia

from Docklands Studios
in Melbourne,

where they created
the "Night Owl" soundstage,

and they lived there
for 20 days.

Okay, back to the movie.

And also,
did you notice this, Darcy?

This movie sets
the all time record

for sitting through
production company logos

at the beginning of the movie.
-[Laughter]

-I mean,
how could you not notice that?

Honestly. [Laughs]
-I mean...

Were there 17 companies
making this movie?

I mean, one of the companies
was from Abu Dhabi.

You know, and they all
had cool animated logos

that we had to wade through
at the beginning of the movie.

-I mean, yeah,
it was hard to miss that.

-Okay. Exactly. Okay.

You know,
the MGM lion roars twice, right?

I mean, we're used to that.
Leo the lion.

Three seconds, maybe four,
you know.

We don't need 27 little
animated short films

with the names
of obscure producers

floating across the screen.

Some of those logos
are 11 seconds.

11 seconds for a logo, something
that could be one second,

and they're showing them when
we're ready to watch the movie.

Right?
-Right.

And we are ready
to watch the movie.

-Oh, right. Yeah. Okay.
-Thank you.

-Yeah. Sorry.

[Laughter]

[Harmonica plays]

-And we're clear.

Just the wardrobe.
-[Alarm ringing]

-Hey, Mr. Christou,
that was fantastic.

You are truly blessed.
Jack, can we talk?

-Not right now, Gus.
-It's just backstage.

They're saying you and Leo
have got something cooked up

when that girl comes on.

-As far as I know,
we're sticking to the rundown.

-Right. Right.
-[Coughing]

-It's just I saw restraints,
Jack, and -- and knives.

I've got to be honest
with you,

we're a little spooked
back there.

-Gus, what the hell are you
doing here?

Get to wardrobe.
-Yes, sir. Yes, sir.

-[Speaking indistinctly]

Mr. Christou, you look like
you might need a bourbon.

-Just some water, please.
-In this place?

I'll see what I can do.
Some water for Mr. Christou.

Are you happy to stay with us
a little longer?

-I really should--
-That's the spirit.

I can't wait to catch your act,
by the way.

You've got some blood
under your nose.

Jack, mind if we...?
-Thank you.

-Jesus Christ.

The charlatan
really went all out there.

-Oh, boy. That bit with the
lights was your idea, wasn't it?

-If you liked it, yeah,
I'll take full credit.

What'd you think
about our friend Barry?

You okay, buddy?
-Yeah.

That last --
-Look, whatever happened

was great television.

Don't let it rattle you.

Okay. Some orders of business.

We're running along late
to break.

-Okay, but we're
not bumping Cleo again.

-Well, we'll try
to make up some time.

Oh, don't look now,

but Cavendish is
new vice president of marketing,

and his wife is sitting
in the front row

with the head of airtime.

You're looking directly at them.

I don't understand that.
Hey, they want to talk to you.

They want to meet you.

-No, I don't have time
to play kiss ass right now.

In case you hadn't noticed,

I'm trying to host
a national syndicated talk show.

-And I'm trying
to help you keep it on the air.

-McConnell?
-Okay.

-Where's McConnell?
-Next break, okay?

How's June? Did they land?
She okay?

-She's fine. Just fine.

-Great. The girl?
-Jack, will you please relax?

Everything's going very,
very well.

Phil, what the hell's going on
with those lights?

-We're working on it.

30 seconds, people.

-Hey.
-Nothing's been fixed since --

-Hey, great show so far.
-Thanks, Sammy.

How are you?
-Good. How are you?

-I'm okay.
How's my hair looking?

-Alright. You look great.
-Good.

-Bats in the queue?
-You are all clear.

-Okay.
-Thank you.

-Jack, which card?
-Hey.

-Is this necessary?

-You got a little bit
of a sweat going on, honey.

-Please stop!

-Fine. Suit yourself.

-Hey. Hmm?
-Fear not, friends.

Your humble sidekick
has returned.

-[Laughter]
-[Coughing]

-Stand by, everyone.
-[Speaks indistinctly]

-Haig's on next.
Pay him no mind.

He's all wax, no wick.
Okay?

-And we're back in 5, 4...

-[Coughs]

-[Applause]
-[Ghoulish music plays]

[Bat screeching]

-Thank you. Welcome back
to our Halloween special, folks.

For those of you just tuning in,

Mister Christou here wowed us
before the break

with the demonstration
of his medium mystic powers.

It was really something.
Am I right?

[Cheers and applause]
Amazing.

Our next guest is
someone equally renowned

in his own field.

Once known to us all
as Carmichael, The Conjurer.

You remember him? Yeah.

Well, he hung up the wand
several years ago

to become one of the leading
voices of the skeptics movement.

Ladies and gentlemen,
make welcome, if you dare,

Mr. Carmichael Haig.

-[Cheers and applause]
-[Instrumental music plays]

It's so good to see you again,
Car.

-It is wonderful to be here,
Jack.

Mind if I smoke?
-Please, be my guest.

Oh, boy, that was good.
-[Audience exclaims]

[Exclaiming continues]

Wow.

He's still got it.

Ladies and gentlemen.
-Holy smoke! [Laughs]

-Come...Come on.
-[Applause]

I'm right here.

Car, we all know you
from the Vegas shows,

the TV specials.

Your group hypnosis routine
was the first of its kind.

Absolutely boggled my mind
when I saw it.

Many regarded you
as the best in the biz.

And I know my saying that
won't embarrass you.

-Correct on all counts.
Continue, dear friend.

-[Laughter]
-But in recent years

it seems you've turned
your attention

to something a little more,
shall we say, philanthropic?

-You mean IFSIP.
-IFSIP.

Now, IFSIP, for those of you
not in the know,

is an acronym it stands for --
let me get this right here --

the International Federation
of Scientific Investigation
into the Paranormal.

Ooh, it's a lot of words.

We've got some pictures up
right here. Take a look.

-Photogenic lot, aren't we?

Yes, it is our mission
to test these claims

and determine what is trickery

and what may in fact
be genuine sci phenomena.

Oh, that's me about to embark

on a little ghost hunt
in Amityville.

My dear friends
Ed and Lorraine Warren

declined the invitation
to join me.

Easily spooked.
-Car, be honest with me.

What is the harm
for those of us

who just want to believe
in something mysterious,

something bigger than ourselves?

Hmm?
-Yeah, I'm the first to admit

the world would be
a more interesting place

if, uh, if people could
magically bend spoons,

or divide water with a stick,
or...

...talk to the dead.
-[Audience exclaims]

But until I am presented
with irrefutable proof,

I will continue
to expose these men and women

for the swindlers they are.

-Still carry that check
with you, Car?

-Oh, yes.

We offer a not insubstantial
reward

for anyone
whose claims can be verified.

-Can we get a shot on this?
Camera 1.

100 grand.
-[Audience exclaims]

How many have taken up
the challenge?

-Oh, dozens.
-[Coughs]

-And how many checks
have you signed?

-Yet to sacrifice a nickel,
Jack.

-Tonight might be the night,
though, folks.

Right?
-[Cheers and applause]

-I do not need this man's money.

-No, I imagine you don't.

Not when there are so many naive
but well-meaning people

prepared to hand over
their hard-earned.

-[Coughing forcefully]
-You okay? Okay.

Can you drink the water?
You okay?

-[Chugging, gulping]

I'm alright. Thank you.
-Okay.

-Um, now, Car, explain to us
Mr. Christou's readings,

then, before we went to break.

-What I saw was an admittedly
accomplished performer

digging from a bag of tricks

that goes back
to biblical times.

By my count, Christou flopped
no less than five times

before he hit on the tenuous
Peterson connection.

-It was Peterman!
-[Laughs]

He's flawless, in hindsight.
-Okay, Car.

But I observed nothing untoward

when Mr. Christou appeared
to connect these two ladies

with their deceased son.

We all saw that.
Everyone here. Right?

-Which I would say

even a broken clock
is right twice a day.

-One slice!
-[Audience booing]

-You no more have the power
of divination

than I resemble Burt Reynolds.
-[Laughs]

-You, sir, like me, are a liar,
a cheat,

a charlatan, and a fake.

The difference being,
I'm honest about it.

-Come on.

-Oh, okay.
-Flair for the theatrical

doesn't go astray.
-Christou, wait!

I-I still have to ask you
something.

Please. We have not yet
discussed the last reading.

-Yet another cold trail.
Minnie. Molly. Mandy. Anyone.

-Put a sock in it, will you,
Car?

Enough.

Funny as it may seem...

I actually believe
that that last reading...

may have been meant for me.

-Yes?

Minnie, who? Who's Minnie?

-Minnie is the private nickname
for...

Madeleine, my wife.
-[Audience exclaims]

-Mm.
-Your wife?

Yes. Sh-- She crossed over,
didn't she?

[Stifled cough]
-An unmarried man

wearing a wedding ring.
-[Audience exclaims]

I think you meant this.

-Jack, please.

Half the people in this room
are wearing one.

-Okay.
-And Madeleine's death

was hardly a secret.

This is what I'm talking about.

It is a statistical certainty

that some fool
will take the bait.

Don't be that fool.
-What are you up to, Car?

-Let's see if the mad monk
really can conjure up

the spirit of your dead wife
live on air.

Half a million dollars
should be incentive enough, no?

-[Audience exclaims]
-Christou?

-[Grumbling]
-Buddy?

-[Audience shouting]
-God damn it, man!

-Go to commercial!
Go to a goddamn commercial!

-[Alarm ringing]
-Clear!

-It's okay. It's gonna be okay.
You're just overtired, baby.

-Something's not right!
-I need a doctor!

-Get him to his dressing room
now.

And someone just clean up
all this mess.

-The Surgeon General strongly
advises taking Pepto-Bismol

before speaking with the dead.

So, is anyone here
from out of town?

This was a gift
from Charles Laughton,

I'll have you know.

You, you, you.
[Snaps fingers]

Fetch the burgundy blazer
from my portmanteau, will you?

-Christ, it must have been
a seizure or something.

-You play the "aw, shucks"
mid-westerner so well, Jack.

That bit about Madeline
and your secret nickname,

very impressive.
-What are you talking about?

-There are only three ways he
could have known about that.

One, he's actually psychic,

which we both know
is impossible.

Two, he got lucky.
Possible, but highly improbable.

Or three...
-You think that I told him?

-I wouldn't blame you
if you did.

A little on-air drama
can't be bad for ratings, right?

-Right, right.
-I do read the trades, Jack.

I'd have thought your high
powered friends at the Grove

could pull a few strings.

-I think you overestimate
their influence.

-You must invite me
along one of these days.

I'd love to know
if the rumors are true.

The secret handshakes, the
orgies, the arcane ceremonies.

But mostly the orgies.
-Jack, rundown briefing.

-Give me an audience
with the Grand Poobah, Jack.

I'll fit right in.
-Good man, Sticks.

-I told you not to leave me
alone with that asshole.

-What am I, your mother?
The ambulance is coming.

You can talk to Cavendish
in the next break.

Extenuating circumstances.

-Any word from Bedford yet?

-The switchboard lit up
like a Rosenburg, though.

-People are upset? Offended?
-Angry. Confused.

-None of which
is terrible news, of course.

-Mr. Fiske?
-No, no, no, no, no.

This comes out
on the next break.

Check your rundown.
-[Alarm ringing]

-Straight to the door.
-Oh, shit.

-I'm not picking up anything
down here, Steve.

You picking up anything weird,
Lou?

-Just get it together!
-We're on in 5, 4...

-Oh, not my chair.

-[Cheers and applause]
-[Instrumental music plays]

-Thank you.

And thank you to everyone

who's been calling in
to check on Mr. Christou.

Don't be alarmed, folks.

He is receiving medical
attention backstage as we speak.

-They needn't bother.

The man is perfectly fine,
I assure you.

-Well...

-Your dry cleaner may disagree,
Car.

[Laughter]

-Well, that's just an old
vaudeville routine.

Spouting they call it.
Control regurgitation.

-Anyway,

I certainly hope you're going
to keep that check handy.

-The che--
-Your breast pocket.

-[Laughs]

-[Audience exclaims]
-Silky as ever, Car.

-He got you, Jack.
-[Laughter]

-My sixth sense is telling me
we may just see this check again

before the night is through.
-I very much doubt that.

-Wait until you meet
our next guests.

-Giddy with excitement, Jack.
-You should be.

-[Laughter]
-Now about a --

[Siren wailing in distance]

About a month ago,

a manuscript happened
to cross my desk that...

well, I haven't been
able to stop thinking about,

quite frankly, the book.

"Conversations with the Devil"

by Dr. June Ross-Mitchell
hits shelves this week,

and it is certain to challenge

more than a few skeptics
out there.

Now, before I bring
on the doctor

and the young subject
of the book,

I wanted to share with you
all a clip produced by June's

Sci Research Center.

Hopefully catch us all
up to speed,

but please be warned,

anyone with young children
in the room,

what you're about to see
is profoundly disturbing

and shocking.

Can we roll the tape, please?

-A seemingly ordinary house
on an ordinary street.

-[Bell ringing]
Only this is the headquarters

of the infamous first church
of Abraxas.

-I command thee
to come forth

and bestow these blessings
of hell upon us.

Hail Abraxas!
-[Congregation] Hail Abraxas!

-The church's founder
and leader,

the enigmatic Szandor D'Abo.

-Abraxas shows us there is
no good, no evil, no redemption.

Only what we desire
and how we obtain it.

-You make it sound very easy,
Monsieur D'Abo.

-Make no mistake.

The master demands sacrifice.

-D'Abo's activities come
to the attention of the FBI,

who suspect the cult of
kidnapping and firearm offenses.

But even more alarming
are the stories

of children being bred
for human sacrifice.

-...and the spilling of blood.

Come forth.
Open the gates of hell.

-D'Abo claims that anyone

who witnesses
these dreadful rituals

will fall under the spell
of the demon Abraxas,

and so perform
his earthly bidding.

-And so it is done.

-Events take a tragic turn
in August '74,

when federal agencies
lay siege to the house.

-Shots have been fired.

-After a tense
three-day standoff,

D'Abo commands his followers
to douse the premises,

and themselves, in gasoline.

[Sirens wailing]

But remarkably,
among the smoldering ruins,

a terrified
10-year-old girl is discovered.

She goes only by the name
of Lily.

Her memories of her time in the
house, fractured and incomplete.

Was her survival part
of D'Abo's wicked master plan,

or was she simply the lucky one?

At a loss to explain
Lilly's strange behavior,

the FBI contacts
my Sci Research Center.

Lilly and I
make an immediate connection.

Important breakthroughs follow,

but there is still much work
to be done.

It's 2:30 p.m. July 10, 1976.

This is a recording
of our first session.

-[Lilly Breathing heavily]

-Okay.
It seems we've made contact.

Who am I speaking to now?

Is this the demon
known as the --

-[Screaming loudly]

-Hold her tight.

We need your help in here!

[Shouting wildly]

[Shouting stops abruptly]

-Wow.

Ladies and gentlemen,

please welcome
Dr. June Ros- Mitchell

and Lilly.

-[Cheers and applause]
-[Instrumental music plays]

-You can come out.

-Hi.
-[Audience exclaims]

Lilly.

How are you?

Whoa! Good to meet you.

So good to see you again, June.
-You, too, Jack.

-And Lilly, so pleased
that you could join us today.

-Thank you, Mr. Delroy.

I'm so glad you could join us,
too.

[Laughter]
-Now, Lilly, um,

you don't have to look
at the camera.

You can actually talk
directly to me.

-Oh. I'm sorry.
-Don't be silly.

I want to start with a
tough question, if that's okay.

I'd like to know...

have you ever watched
my show before?

-[Laughter]
-No.

I'm normally in bed by now.

But I know who you are,
Mr. Delroy.

-Oh, please.
You can call me Jack.

-June says you're
very handsome, Jack.

-[Audience exclaims]
-[June chuckles nervously]

-You're the man
whose wife died of cancer.

-Lilly, I don't think Jack
wants --

-I was very sad
when I heard about that.

I know what it's like to lose
people who are close to you.

It's lonely at first,
but you'll get through.

-Such wise words
from one so young, huh?

-Lilly has been through more
in her 13 years

than most adults go through
in a lifetime.

-And you needn't worry
about your TV show.

I think you're going to be
very famous soon.

-Why,
thank you for the reassurance.

I was beginning to wonder,
Gus.

-Me, too.
-[Laughter]

-You're welcome.

-Okay, well,
we're going to take a break.

Um, but on the other side --

yes, the other side --

we're going to spend
some time getting to know

these two extraordinary ladies.

-[Instrumental music plays]
-[Cheers and applause]

[Indistinct chatter]

-Okay,
so far everything on the show

is a version of something from
"The Tonight Show" in the '70s.

The goofy --
well, he's not the bandleader,

but he stands
in front of the band,

he's the sidekick --
that guy is a version...

well, he's a version
of two people.

He's Doc Severinsen,
the trumpet player

who directed "The Tonight Show"
band,

and Ed McMahon.

And then Christou
is a version

of two Johnny Carson
regular guest sidekicks.

One was The Amazing Kreskin,

and the other
was The Amazing Criswell.

And then Carson himself
was a magician,

and he loved magic acts,
but he especially loved

magic acts that used
spiritualism as a hook.

But he also loved a debunker
of psychic phenomena

named James Randi,

who started out
as The Amazing Randi

because he was a mentalist
himself.

But then he turned
against his own profession,

and he would come on the show
to expose frauds like Uri Geller

by explaining how his ability
to bend spoons with his mind

is actually just
an optical trick.

James Randi also had
a connection

to "The Don Lane show",

but for the opposite reason.

Don Lane actually believed
in Uri Geller

and stormed off his own show

when James Randi exposed
a trick.

So Christou is played
by Fayssal Bazzi,

an Australian actor

who was in another notorious
found footage film called

"We're Not Here to Fuck Spiders"
in 2020.

[Laughter]

That's --
Apparently, that's --

-I mean, speak for yourself.
-Australian --

-That's a phrase in Australia.

People say that, you know.

Anyway, that movie is
supposedly hidden cameras

in the house of a crystal
meth dealer in South Sydney.

So you see this
imprisoned girlfriend

and all these corrupt cops
and criminals

that come through South Sydney.

Anyway, besides looking a little
like Omar Sharif, in my opinion,

Bazzi has that gold
Nehru jacket,

and that is just perfect
for this.

And then when
the James Randi clone comes out,

that is Ian Bliss,
who you may recognize

as the villain Bane
from "The Matrix" sequels.

And he's got that
self-righteous air of contempt

that makes himself unlikable,

even though
you know he's probably right.

And that was
exactly like James Randi.

I should mention
two other references.

Supposedly, Lilly,
the girl rescued from the cult,

was a survivor of a raid on
a religious compound that will,

of course, remind everybody of
the David Koresh cult in Waco,

the Branch Davidians, where
84 people died in that FBI raid,

but the filmmakers were using
real footage of another FBI raid

that also ended
in a bonfire of death.

And that was the FBI's
attempt to serve warrants

on the Symbionese Liberation
Army in L.A. in 1974.

Almost everybody died
in that raid, too.

And then there have been 2
or 3 references to The Grove.

Jack Delroy is a member
of this secret fraternity

of extremely wealthy
and powerful men

who gather in the woods

and perform strange rites
together

and supposedly network
behind the scenes.

And there is such a club, and
it's called the Bohemian Grove,

and it's in
Monte Rio, California,

in the Redwood Forest
north of San Francisco.

And one of the founders of it,
back in the 19th century,

was Ambrose Bierce,
one of my favorite writers.

So I have read everything
ever printed about him

and everything
he's ever written.

And I can guarantee you that
if Ambrose Bierce was involved,

anything was possible

and especially anything
was possible

as to orgiastic indulgence,
so...

If you know what I mean,
and I think you do.

So Carmichael, the skeptic,

is both exposing Delroy's
membership

and sort of asking to attend one
of the orgies at The Grove.

So anyway,

why am I speculating about
whether Jack Delroy did

or did not indulge
in esoteric rites

in the woods
of Northern California,

when the man himself
is here with us tonight?

Please welcome
David Dastmalchian.

[All whooping]

-Here, here.
-Good to see you, David.

-Thank you for having me.
-Alright.

-Thank you.
-David, where's your snake?

Where's your snake?
-Oh, I think the last time

I saw you,
I was draped in snake.

-Yeah, they told me
you were a snake handler.

We were doing a parody
of late night talk shows.

You come on
as the snake handler,

holding a giant boa constrictor.

You told me you'd been handling
snakes for, like, half a day.

-About half of it.
-Why did you do that, David?

-Because it was
an opportunity to get to come

and be with you guys.
-Okay, well...

-There it is. Yes.

And, you know,
and fulfilling a lifelong dream

of getting to be on late night.

-So you lied to --
as a snake handler?

-It's show business.
-Okay.

-Come on.
This is how it works.

-Alright, well,
congratulations

on the runaway success
of "Late Night with the Devil".

-Thank you.
-Which you carry the movie

from beginning to end.

And when I hear people
talk about your performance --

And everyone loves
your performance.

I've heard people say
that you're doing

a little bit of Dick Cavett.

They always say you're doing
a little bit of Don Lane

because of
this Australian thing.

And so...
And I've never seen Don Lane,

so I don't know if you are
or not.

How did you -- Who did you study

and how did you study
for your attitude on this?

What tapes did you look at?

-Started with Johnny Carter.

The amazing wealth of footage

that's on YouTube at these --
at this point is amazing.

And I go to bed at night,
and I would put on

Johnny Carson old tapes
and watch Johnny Carson

or David Letterman, and then
Colin and Cameron Cairnes,

who wrote
and directed the movie.

They told me about Don Lane,
and I fell down a Don Lane,

uh, rabbit hole
and also I thought,

I want a little pepper
of everybody in here,

the people especially,
who like to push the limits

a little bit for ratings.

So I pulled a little
Phil Donahue,

a little Morton Downey Jr.
I was thinking about --

-Listen,
I want to stop you there

because I did not see
anybody mention that,

but I see that Phil Donahue
in your performance,

the smarmy part of Phil Donahue.

'Cause Fred Olen Ray,
if you know who that is,

and we went on
"The Phil Donahue Show"

years ago,
and he just destroyed us.

Phil just destroyed us.
-What?

-Yeah, we were on
"The Phil Donahue Show".

-We are finding that footage,
too.

-He brought a scream
queen on there,

and Phil Donahue
thought we were scum.

I mean,
but he did it in that cloying,

patronizing way that makes his
studio audience happy, you know?

-But he was
plus in those ratings.

He loved it. He'd get
as much shock as he could.

But Don Lane,
what I loved about Don,

like you said,
did he believe in Uri Geller?

Absolutely. Did
he want to believe in something?

And I think that was
what made him, uh,

he just -- he was --
-He wore his heart

on his sleeve.
-He absolutely did.

Yeah. Yeah.
-You know, anyway,

we're going to go back
to the movie,

but stick around because...

And, um...And what do they do
at Bohemian Grove?

Did you make a deal with Satan
to get better ratings

when you were out there
in the woods with, uh,

Sammy Davis Jr. or whoever --

whatever celebrities
were out there?

-Orgiastic splendor, as you say.
Well, The Grove, sure.

It's a shopping center
somewhere off Fairfax and, uh...

Yeah, I go there
for the Barnes and Noble

and the Cold Stone Creamery,
I think.

-Okay, I could see --

I could actually see
Johnny Carson

hanging out at The Grove
if he was invited.

So, um, do you have any
questions for David, Darcy?

-Well, I really
wanted to talk about the comics.

-Oh, the comics, the comics.
Sure. The comic books. Yeah.

I'm getting an extension cord
'cause I'd like to do a plug.

-You're also a creator
of comic books.

And by the way, did
you move from Dark Horse to DC?

-I'm in an orgiastic whatever.

I want to meet with everybody.

So I'm doing --
DC is allowing me to resurrect,

in comic book format,
one of my favorite comics

from the old "Weird War Tales"

when I was a kid that was
called the "Creature Commandos",

where you've got a werewolf,
a Frankenstein's monster,

a Gorgon,
and [Stammers] these creatures

who are recruited to fight
on behalf of the U.S. Army

and do things that they wouldn't
want to send regular soldiers.

-But your regular comic
is at Dark Horse, right?

-"Count Crowley",
which is inspired

by Crematia Mortem,

who was my childhood
Creature Feature host.

-Okay, I'm going to ask you
about that later.

-Yep.
-Alright?

And, uh, Image is letting
me do "Knights Vs. Samurai",

which comes out next month, and
it's pretty much how it sounds.

There's knights,
there's samurai.

The only thing that's not
in the title is dragons,

'cause there are dragons.
-So you are deep,

deep, deep in the comics world?
-I love the comics,

and I love old horror movies,

so I think I'm
at the right place.

-Alright.
-Thanks.

-Alright, well, roll the film.

And the reason I use
Sammy Davis Jr. as an example --

-Him and Anton Lavey.
-...in the orgy is, uh...

In The Grove,
he actually did join --

Sammy Davis Jr. actually did
join the Church of Satan.

And he was known
to be an orgy lover.

And they probably have
a plaque on the wall

at the Bohemian Grove clubhouse
with Sammy's picture

and his orgy totals on it.

Or maybe not, but...
-He was a good time.

-His orgy totals.
-[Laughs]

-Please.

[Harmonica plays]

-And we're clear.
-[Alarm rings]

-Great.
That was great, ladies.

Lilly, you are adorable.
-Thank you, Jack.

And which camera
do I look at now?

-Um, well, we're off air,
so none.

Time to make ourselves
pretty again.

-Hey, Jack.

Don't I already look pretty,
Jack?

-You're good.

-Sure you do.
-Hi. I'm Lilly.

-Jack, we need to talk.
-Let me take that for you.

-Thank you.
-Wow. Weird kid.

-Meet you right down there.

[Quietly] That was great.

You ready?

-This is so much fun.

-Welcome to the dream factory,
kid.

-I really don't think
it's a good idea, Jack.

She's becoming
more unpredictable.

-Unpredictable?
That's a good thing.

-That's why we still do live TV.

I mean, it's what's gonna
help sell your book.

-This isn't about the book.
-Isn't it?

-Yesterday, she went into one
of her fugue states,

and she, uh...
she started saying your name.

-She's excited
about being on the show.

-No, it was as if
she was recalling something.

It was hard to make sense of it,

but it was strange,
even for her.

-Look, you are ready for this.

You told me that you're ready,
alright?

You know you did it.
-Yes, well,

there may have been a few lapses
of judgment on my part that...

-This is your time.
You've done the work.

You're not going to back out
right now.

-Yeah, I admit you made
a convincing case.

But my first responsibility
is to Lilly.

And I'm telling you,
it's too risky.

-No, I --
-I should get back to her.

-She's not getting cold feet,
is she?

-She's fine. She is fine.
-[Sighs]

-I'm handling it!

-Hey, Jack.
-Hey.

-Okay,
so just got a call from Sinai.

Christou is dead.

-What?
-He had some kind of hemorrhage

in the ambulance.

-Holy shit.
-I know.

-No. No, no, no. I thought that
that was all part of his act.

The -- What did Haig call it?
Spouting?

-Well, apparently he was
spouting from, well, everywhere.

The paramedics couldn't get it
under control.

-Jesus Christ!
-I know. I know. I know.

-[Quietly] Listen,
nobody can find out about this.

Especially not Gus.
-I'll do the best that I can.

But you know how quickly
word spreads around here.

-Staging, where's my
sacrificial dagger?

We're on in 60 seconds.

-Hey, hey, Phil,
has the rundown changed?

Staging's saying something
about a new bit

and seg five and I don't --
-Okay. Shh, shh, shh.

Look, I'm telling you, Steve,
whatever it is,

we're not seeing it
on the monitor down here.

-Hey, Phil!
-You just keep switching

cameras, and I'll make sure
everybody gets their cues, okay?

-Phil! Phil!
-Stand by, everyone.

-Phil!
-And there was a questionnaire

you had to complete
before coming in, you said?

-Yeah, that's right.
-Oh, and there was a lady

in the lobby who asked
a bunch of questions, too.

-Oh, yeah.

It was the same woman
who came out

and helped Mr. Christou
when he...

-Oh, yes, I know.
Most disturbing, wasn't it?

Thank you, ladies.

-Thank you.

[Indistinct chatter]

-Is everything okay, Jack?

-Yeah, everything is fine,
sweetie.

-10 seconds.

-[Whispers]
Where the hell is Haig?

[Alarm ringing]

-And we're back in 5, 4...

-[Cheers and applause]
-[Ghoulish music plays]

-And welcome back to our
very special Halloween edition

of "Night Owls".

Now, ladies, there is so much

that I'd like to discuss
with you both,

but I want to start with you,
June.

Now, you call yourself
a parapsychologist?

What exactly does that --
-I call myself one

because that's what I am,
Jack.

It so happens I have
a PhD in the subject.

-From the University of Hogwash,
if I'm not mistaken.

-The Stanford Research
Institute, actually.

-The difference being?

-Is it really worth
us continuing

if this man is going
to interrupt every time

you ask a question?
-Car, please behave.

-As I was going to say,

we parapsychologists believe
there are certain phenomena,

sci phenomena,

that traditional science is
ill equipped to understand.

Telepathy, for example,
telekinesis,

apparitional anomalies.
-Demonic possession.

Psychic infestation
is the term we prefer.

But yes.

-And it's your belief that Lilly
here presents just such a case.

-For the past three years,

I've been combining
age regression therapy

with a growing understanding
of ancient satanic rituals

to piece together the details
of Lilly's life

and to grasp the nature of
the demon that lurks within her.

-This is the demon Abraxas

that the charming Mr. D'Abo
spoke of in your clips?

-No, I believe it's more
likely one of the minor deities

said to serve Abraxas.

These entities thrive
on our confusion.

-And our stupidity.

-Look,
I understand that some of this

might seem to stretch credulity,
but remember,

big new scientific ideas
are always greeted

with some resistance.

It's only the most closed minded
that greet them with ridicule.

[Cheers and applause]

-Incidentally,
we have some pieces here

from your private collection.

Whew. Okay, well,
girl's got to have a hobby, huh?

-[Laughter]
-That dagger was recovered

from the remains
of the D'Abo House.

We believe it was used
in many of the church's

sacrificial ceremonies.

-No! Oh, God!

[Struggling] I can't stop it.

Turn off your TV sets before
Abraxas claims your souls.

-Car.

-[Chuckles] You truly are
a suggestible lot.

Handy to know.
-Mr. Haig,

we haven't come on here
for your amusement.

-Don't be silly, my dear.

If we accept
the Gnostic interpretation,

Abraxas is
the consummate showman.

He craves an audience.

After all, his name is
the source of the magician's

favorite incantation.
-Abracadabra.

-Clever girl.

-Now, Lilly, I understand that
you have a name for this thing

that lives inside of you.

-Mm-hmm.
I call him Mr. Wriggles.

-Why do you call him that?

-He kind of wriggles
his way inside my head,

and then he wriggles
his way out.

-But with June's help,
you are able to control him.

-June says that everyone
has a demon inside them,

but we can't always
control them, can we?

[Theremin plays]

-Gus.

-I got it, Jack.

[Electricity crackling]

♪

-Gus! Is there an off switch
for that thing?

-How the hell should I know?

[Loud feedback, rumbling]

[Glasses shattering]

[Screams]

[Feedback stops]

-It was feeding back
through your PA system.

-No.
-It's the same physics

as when a soprano
hits "G" over high "C."

Poof!

-Okay, Car, but come on.
That was --

-He's wrong, you know?

It was Mr. Wriggles.
-[Whispers] Mr. Wriggles?!

-He did it.

-If you insist, little one.

-Why must you be
so condescending, Mr. Haig?

-Lilly, do you mean

that Mr. Wriggles is here
in the studio with us right now?

-Mm-hmm.

-Would it be okay if we
invited him on the show?

-Jack, I thought
I made it clear...

-I think so.
-No, I can't allow that.

A summoning requires a carefully
controlled environment.

The lights, cameras,
audience --

conditions here
are hardly conducive.

-A TV studio's a controlled
enough environment for my money.

-Half a million bucks,
to be precise.

-Can we? June, please!

-Yeah!
-We want to see!

-Come on, June.
-Come on, June.

-We want to see.
-Do it!

-Come on!

-We want to see!
-Show us, June.

-Come on, June!

-The people have spoken.

-If I'm able to conduct
the session

with the full cooperation
of your crew, your audience,

and your guests,

then perhaps we can attempt
a brief demonstration.

-Yeah!
-Yes, of course.

[Applause]

This is great news.
It's great news.

Ladies and gentlemen,
please stay tuned

for a live television first

as we attempt to commune
with the devil.

But not before
a word from our sponsors.

♪

-Clear!
[Bell rings]

Step lively, people.
We have two minutes

to prep the main stage,
checks on June and Lilly.

-You bastard.
You ambushed me.

-You didn't require
too much convincing, dearie.

Bread and circuses.
-You shut up.

This is your chance
to prove people like him wrong.

This is your moment, June.

-Did you hear anything
I said back there?

You know, for a talk show host,
you're a terrible listener.

-Is somebody gonna
clean up the glass?

-Lilly's okay with it.
Aren't you, sweetheart?

-Sure, Jack.
-Can I get you two ladies

to follow me downstage, please?

-Mm-hmm. Yeah.

-Jack, can I get a minute?
-Can it wait?

-No, sir. It cannot.

-Excuse me, uh, Phil.

There are
some restraints backstage.

Would you mind?
-Sure.

-I hope you know
what you're doing, lady.

-We know what we're doing,
Sammy. Don't we, June?

-Jerry, you got
the new lighting cues?

-What?

-You're meddling with things
you don't understand.

-Okay. If we...

manage to conjure Satan,

I give you express permission
to go right for that exit.

Okay? If Earth swallows us
whole, I apologize in advance.

Okay?
-What has gotten into you?

Half an hour ago, you thought

Madeleine was trying to reach
out to you from the grave.

And now...
-Now -- Now, buddy,

all I'm trying to do is save
our fucking show. Okay?

So enough
with the sanctimonious crap.

-I know about Christou.

It's that Mr. Wriggles,
isn't it?

He's behind this whole thing.

-Who else knows
about Christou?

-Crew's scared, Jack.
I'mscared.

Okay? Some of us
are talking about jumping ship.

-No one's going anywhere,
God damn it.

And you need to keep this
fire-and-brimstone bullshit

to yourself.
Please, Gus?

Okay?
-You are not a bad man, Jack.

You're not.
And I am begging you

to stop this before
something terrible happens.

-Jack, you're gonna intro
the girls downstage.

-Mm.

-Is there a problem here?

-Stand by, everybody.

-There's no problem.

[Bell rings]

-We are back in five...

four...

-Well, before we attempt
to commune with the devil,

I should ask you, David,

um, how spooked were you
by Lilly?

Because that is
one deranged performance.

She looked freaky to me.
-She's terrifying.

Ingrid, this actor, she's so
sweet, so nice.

You know, like all actors.
How's it going?"

I'm walking down past
her dressing room at one point.

"Hey. Good morning, Ingrid."

And she's in there
getting ready,

and she's looking in the mirror,
getting in character.

And there is something
in her eyes

that just utterly,
diabolically perplexed

and scared the living crap
out of me.

And then, when we were on set
together,

and she'd go into that face and
that voice and I thought,

"Oh, crap, she's really creepy,
but she's a teenager."

Hmm. "Lilly, my wife and I
want to go out on Friday night.

Would you babysit for my kids?"

And she was like,
"Sure, I will."

So not only
was she terrifying me on set,

she would babysit for my kids
on the weekends.

Isn't that nice? Yeah.
-Wow.

I have heard actors say
that, if you --

if you want to do evil
on camera,

look into the mirror
at your own eyes.

Stare into your own eyes.

-Someone gave her that tip
because it worked,

and she scared the crap
out of me.

Yeah.
-Well, she --

She couldn't have been that old.
How old was she?

She was like 16. Maybe.

-16?
This was her first feature.

Her main credit before this is

she starred in
"Matilda the Musical" in Sydney.

-Theater, yeah.
-She's a theater person.

But that's a role
for a ten-year-old, though.

And she said in an interview

that she had never celebrated
Halloween.

They didn't do Halloween
in her neighborhood.

-Oh, no, that's so sad.
-You know, raising the question,

where the fuck was
her neighborhood?

-I've traveled
the world now,

and I'm always perplexed at
how little of a celebration

Halloween is in other parts
of the world

because it is the holiest
of holies in my house.

-But Australia?
I would think they do it there.

-Honestly.
-All right.

Backtracking a little bit.

You're the only American actor
in the movie.

-True story.

-And that's because you wrote
an article for "Fangoria"

about regional horror hosting.
-True.

Especially your childhood
host in Overland Park, Kansas.

And what was her name?

-Crematia Mortem.

-I met Crematia Mortem
in 2012

because "HorrorHound" had
this thing.

They started
the Horror Host Hall of Fame,

and she was one
of the inductees.

And we all gathered
in Indianapolis

and we did a spooky seance

and summoned the spirit
of Vampira.

Anyway, but, David, you wrote
this article for "Fangoria."

-Yeah.
-And the directors

of "Late Night with the Devil"
saw the article

and they decided,
"He's our guy.

We want him for this movie,"
right?

-That's amazing.

-You'd think you'd see
a performance of the guy.

You'd see me do
a theater production,

and you go, "That's the guy."
No.

They read an article
that I wrote

after my mother passed,
and I was thinking about

how horror has gotten me
through so many difficult times

and thinking about the people
that introduced me,

took me in and out of horror.

Thinking about the impact
you've had on my life.

Other friends like Svengooli
and then Crematia Mortem.

They read this article
and they go, "That's the guy."

Which was so strange to me
because when I got the script

and I go, "This is amazing.
This is incredible.

No one would ever send this
to me."

Like, I'm the guy you think
of who's playing the guy

who's breaking in your window
at night to come

and steal the things
and kill the people and maybe --

maybe run the cult.

But that I get to be, like,
an affable, you know,

witty, charming
late night talk show host,

that's so far out
of my sphere of, like,

what I would ever get to do
before.

So I immediately jumped.

Not only did I love the script,
I loved the genre.

-David, the flawed, witty,
charming -- [Laughs]

-Luckily, we get to see him
behind the scenes, as well.

-Yeah.
And, so, David,

with your extensive knowledge
of horror hosting,

who is the best horror host.
-Of all time?

-Yeah.

-[Clearing throat]

-His name is...
Well, you're very close.

You're in the top running,
but...

-He'll take it.
-[Laughing]

-He's kind of a rising
in the ranks guy right now.

He's a bit of a -- bit of a,
uh, over the topper,

but I like over the top.
Dr. Fearless.

I think that's --
-Dr. Fearless.

Where is Dr. Fearless?

-He pops up in shows,
on specials, on YouTube,

I think -- I think he's --
-Okay.

But in all honesty, Vampira was,
for me, the beginning.

-Vampira?
I really loved The Scream --

And Crematia, to me --

by the way,
Crematia was the first crush,

my first introduction to all the
films that I fell in love with.

Acting.

I mean, Crematia, to me,
was all of it.

Yes? Go ahead.

-Why are you questioning
Vampira?

-Well, Vampira was --
-What the fuck is that?

-Vampira was basically
a model.

She posed for the camera.

-She took and ran with it.
-Oh, my gosh.

-No, no, no. Because she was --

She was just in her
Halloween costume at a party.

And then she got to run with it,
and she took it serious.

I mean,
she was writing the bits.

She was excited
about creating a character.

-Okay, I'm a Zacherle guy.
-Respect for Vampira.

-You know.
-Zacherle --

-I'm gonna say
Zacherle invented most --

Zacherle was the DW Griffith
of horror hosting.

I mean, there may have been --
There were directors before

DW Griffith, but DW Griffith,
you know,

sort of established everything.

And I think Zacherle did
the same thing. Anyway.

-I only got to see
a bit of Zacherle,

but the vinyl records I have,

all of the songs
and the bubblegum pop

and the -- I love that stuff.
-All right.

So you grew up in Kansas,

but you studied at DePaul
in Chicago,

and you're pretty much
a creature

of the Chicago theater scene.
Would that be accurate?

-Creature being
the proper term?

-And you're known for being
in a lot of famous movies

in supporting parts.

And what do people
mostly remember you for

in those supporting parts?

-The first role
that I ever had,

I was a theater actor
in Chicago, and I --

I had a small but really fun

role in Christopher Nolan's
"The Dark Knight."

I was in legion with the Joker.

I was a henchman to the Joker.
And people, to this day --

I shot that scene,
those scenes, 17 years ago now.

People will come up to me
and say, "Crazy guy."

[Laughter]

-And also Polka-Dot Man
in "Suicide Squad."

-Well, then, thank you. Yes.
-Whoo!

James Gunn
gave me the role of a lifetime

with that character.

It's one of my favorite roles
I ever got to portray.

-And you were in "Oppenheimer"?

-Certainly was. Yes.
William Borden, who was...

-Aren't you the guy

who falsely accuses Oppenheimer
of being a Russian spy?

-Falsely is a strong term.

I look at every story from
the perspective of my character,

and he deeply believed
that Oppenheimer

was a threat to
national security.

-But without you,
Christopher Nolan has no movie.

Right?
-I told him that all the time.

"Mr. Nolan, you know,
you realize, don't you,

that without this,
there is no that."

-You were also in
"Weird: The Al Yankovic Story."

-Whoo!
-Got to play John Deacon, the...

We all know, right?
The bass player for Queen.

It was a fun bit. Yeah.
-Great performance in that.

Darcy, see, is the ultimate
Al Yankovic fan.

-I mean, ultimate's strong.
-And I am, too. I love Al.

-How do you not love Al?
-He's incredible. Amazing.

-You were raised
in a strict religious household?

-Very true.
-What religion?

-Like evangelical Christian.
-Okay.

-So the devil theory --
-They would have believed

in the devil?
-Absolutely.

-And that made
you believe in the devil?

-It made -- Certainly did.

And I mean, in all seriousness,
like,

really kind of messed me up,

but it's what made me,
the rebellious side of me,

sneak downstairs at 10:00
on a Friday to watch

"Friday Night Scream Theater
with Crematia Mortem,"

or why I would go sneak
"Fangoria."

Some kids were hiding
"Penthouse" letters

under their mattress.

I was hiding "Fangoria" magazine
under mine because that was --

-Why not both?

-Well,
we got there eventually.

It got there.
-All right.

Well, I think your
ambitious plan to save your show

during sweeps week by summoning
the devil on live TV

is probably saddled with
about 17 different ways to fail,

including the fact
that maybe nothing would happen.

You know, um,
but you're blind to that.

-Don't you remember when
Geraldo Rivera was going to open

Capone's glove box or something?
-Exactly, exactly.

That would be the danger
in summoning the devil.

-He still got the ratings.
-That's true.

And, so, but you're covering up
the fact

that a guest has already died
on the way to the hospital

from unexplained seizures.
-Whatever.

-But you're going to press on

because you are
a great television trouper.

-Absolutely.
-Does that about sum up

the plot at this point?
-The show must go on.

-Okay. Roll the flick.
-Word.

-And Darcy?
-Yes.

-Haven't you seen every Weird Al
concert for the last 20 years?

-Every single one.
Yes, absolutely.

-Do you have a favorite song?

-Are you are you buddies
with Weird Al at all?

-"Saga Begins," I think.
-I'm friends with Al.

-Yeah?
-I love Al. Al is the best, man.

He's cool as heck.
-Can we hang out?

-You're buddies with --
-I do, yeah. Al --

-Can you get us backstage
at the Weird Al show?

-You got it.
-Shut up.

-I think the "Good Old Days is
my favorite Weird Al song.

-Yeah? Do you have a favorite
Weird Al song?

-Uh..."Take a Walk
on the Kosher Side."

-Wow.
-"Take a Walk Down Fairfax."

-Well, okay, then.
You're allowed to come.

-Okay. We got Weird Al
networking cred so deep,

we could probably all dance
in a Weird Al video, right?

-He's a member of
Bohemian Grove.

-Well, okay.
Let's go.

-Weird Al at Bohemian Grove?
-Wouldn't that be a show?

That'd be amazing.
-Bring the accordion.

-We're resurrecting
the spirit of Tiny Tim

to do an encore show, too.

-Okay. No, we'll summon
the spirit of Sammy Davis Jr.

-There it is.
-Oh!

[Laughter]

♪

-Welcome back, everyone.

Without further ado,
Dr. June Ross-Mitchell

will commence
the demonstration.

And might I say to you both,
Godspeed?

-Thank you, Jack.

Now, if the entity
is present tonight,

it may manifest itself
in any number of ways,

but its entry into our world
is only possible through Lilly.

I merely provide the key
that unlocks the door.

Whatever you might see or hear,
I ask you all to remain calm.

It's vital that Lilly's
focus remains with me.

Let us begin.

Lilly, to me.

Close your eyes, Lilly.

[Sighs]

That's it.

And let yourself sleep.

Relax.

Lilly, can you hear me?

Lilly?

May I speak to the one
you know as Mr. Wriggles?

If Mr. Wrig--

Quiet.

May I ask who is present now?

-[Grunting]
-Shh!

Please let yourself be known.

-[Demonic laughing]

-Speak.

-[Distorted] You know who I am,
Doctor.

[Audience gasps, screams]

-Please.

-Is that the devil?
-I'm so scared.

-Is she okay?

[Gasps, murmurs]

-Who are
these people?

What is this?

Where am I?!
-There is no need to be alarmed.

-What have you done to me,
Doctor?

-We mean you no harm.
We've brought you into

this realm to better understand
your purpose.

-My purpose?

He's here, isn't he?

Good to see you again, Jack.

-Uh...Sorry.

I don't believe
we've been acquainted.

-Don't be a fool.
We go way back.

We met amongst the tall trees.

Remember?
-Lilly, return to me.

-Oh, Juney, Juney, Juney, Juney!

Be careful now.

You know what happened
to his last whore.

She died.
She died an ugly, ugly death.

-Lilly, come back to me -- now!

-And the worms finished off
with Minnie a long time ago,

didn't they, Jack?

So now you can screw whoever
you want, hmm? Like Dr. June.

Dr. June thinks you're
very handsome, Jack.

Dr. June thinks
you're very, very handsome.

-That's enough! Lilly, I need
you to come back to me now!

-Jack and June went up the hill
to fuck each other's brains out.

Jack and June went up the hill
to [bleep] each other's--

-That's enough!
[Audience gasps]

-[Whimpering]

-Lilly?

Lilly, sweetheart?

-[Normal voice] Why would
you hurt me like that, June?

You know I can't help it.

-I know. I never --
-[Snarls]

-No, Jack! Stay where you are.

Vade retro Satana.

Sunt mala quae libas.

Vade retro Satana.
Sunt mala quae libas.

-[Laughing]

-You were cursed by Anum
and Antum, Lahmum and Du-rum...

-[Together] ...the Underworld
and those who lie in it,

that you shall not seize her,

and you shall not return.
-...return!

-[Distorted] How could you
let it happen, Jack?

How could you let it happen?

[Rumbling]

[Electricity crackling]

[Audience screaming]

♪

♪

[Screams]

[Normal voice] Oh, my God.
I'm so sorry.

-No, no, no, no. No,I'msorry.
I'm so sorry.

I never should have put you
in that position. Okay?

You're okay. You're okay.
Just breathe.

-That was...

-You're okay.

-Ladies and gentlemen,

have you ever seen anything
like that?

-This is unconscionable, Jack.

I would like to point out

a number of tricks employed
by the so-called doctor.

-And you'll get your turn, Car.

Right now...

some messages.

[Applause]

♪

-We're clear.

-Is this a talk show
or a fucking freak show?!

I mean, the depths you people
have sunk to.

-Carmichael, just take
it easy, okay?

Let's get Sammy in
to mop that brow of yours.

Sammy?

-Lilly, are you okay?

-A bit embarrassed, I guess.
I'm okay.

-Phil. I'm sorry. Can we get
a hand with these straps?

-I got you.
-June.

Come here. Come here.

Just, let's...

You're okay.

Jesus.
That was -- I mean...

I knew that we were gonna see
something amazing tonight,

but...

we got to get you guys
back on as soon as possible.

This could become,
like, a regular spot.

-The tall trees.

What did she mean by that?

-I don't know.
Youtellme.

-This isn't some kind
of parlor trick, Jack.

I know that, June.
I mean, this...

There is something very special
happening here with Lilly.

With you.

I just -- I want
to be a part of it.

-You're hurting me!
-Sorry, kid.

Look, I'm trying here.
-Hey, Phil.

It's okay, it's okay.
I got this.

Can I see that? Thanks.
Thanks, guys.

Go ahead.

It's okay, Lilly. It's okay.

-Thank you, Jack.
-Mm-hmm.

-No, she's great.
She's got it all.

Well, this is all very exciting.
Thank you so much.

-Sorry.
-Send regards to Bonnie

and the kids. Okay. Bye-bye.
-We'll have you back next year.

-This isn't about ratings
anymore, Leo. This is sorcery.

-Listen to me, you goddamn
shit-your-pants Mick asshole!

Dial up that grin.
Dial it up.

Dial it up
and get on with your job.

And not one more word.

-It's all smoke and mirrors,
Gus. Trust me.

-Leo should have cut the whole
show right after Christou died.

-Bombed, you mean?

-No. Didn't you hear?

He's dead.

Puked his guts out
on the way to Sinai.

-Two minutes, everyone.

We're on the homestretch.
Let's keep it going.

-[Grunts]
-Thank you, Jack.

-Yeah. Come here.

-And what are we
doing now, Jack?

Um, now it's nearly time
to say good night, darling.

-Oh.
-Jack.

Sammy.
Checks on June and Lilly.

Okay, so three of the crew have just walked off,

the Communications Commission

have called an emergency meeting
at 7:00 AM, and...

-Bedford.
-Mm-hmm.

-What did he say?

-Just that he thinks
it's the biggest TV event

since the moon landing.

Who was I to disagree?
-We're back!

Baby! Back! We're back
from the fucking dead!

-We're talking about 35,
maybe even 40 share.

-"The night Jack Delroy
interviewed

that cock-fucking devil"!
-Well, it might not

be the headlineThe Times,
run with, orThe Post,

for that matter,
but something in that vein.

Oh, and Bedford also took
quite a liking

to -- to June, too.

Asked when she'd be back.
-I'll do what I can.

I guess I don't have to
kiss Cavendish's ass.

-Cavendish?
Screw Cavendish.

After tonight, every fucking
Fortune500 will be lining up

to be a part of the resurrection
of Jack Delroy.

If anyone's gonna be
kissing ass, it's them.

What's the matter?

-Just...

That girl's voice...

-I know. How did she do that?

-Yeah, but at the end, I mean,
she sounded just like Minnie.

You heard that.
-No, no, no, no.

Don't -- Don't you go
all screwy on me, Jack.

I've already got Gus back there
prepping for an exorcism.

-I just got spooked.
That's all.

-Let me tell you something.

If Minnie were here,
she'd be saying,

"You get out there,
Mr. Midnight,

and you knock 'em dead."

-Positions, people.
10 seconds.

-We'll drop the costume parade
to give Carmichael

a few more minutes
on his soapbox,

and then we'll wrap it up,
throw it to Cleo.

-10 seconds, people.

-Jack.
-Can we have Cleo standing by?

-Dagger.
[Bell rings]

-And in five...

four...

-So, Jack Delroy, I'm going to
ask you this as Jack Delroy --

what happened
among the tall trees?

-We can't talk about that.

-Did you have something
in your head

that happened
among the tall trees?

-I did, I did,
David did for sure.

Jack went up there as a retreat,

a way to escape
and get away from it all and to,

you know, get a chance to
network with some of the powers

that be who might have
influence over things.

And, um, you know,

the archaic rituals,

the weird late night dips
into the natural springs pond,

the candle
and the candle wax ceremony,

all that stuff, to me, was just
part of a just boys being boys,

just have a little bit of fun.
-Uh-huh.

But then it goes
a little too far maybe?

-Maybe. Maybe. Maybe.

-Okay, so, in real life...
-Yes.

-...you get this call
from Melbourne, Australia,

from Cameron Cairnes
and Colin Cairnes.

Let's start with that.
You had two directors.

-Yeah.
-How did two directors work?

-It was really interesting

because they're both
two sides of a coin, you know.

I feel like
Colin was more interacting --

although they both did --
in, like,

performative and some of the,
like, more hands-on stuff.

And Cameron's kind of walking
behind very intellectual.

But they're both
monster kids,

dyed in the wool monster kids.

I mean, these guys
were raised on "Fangoria,"

raised on the horror stuff
that I love.

And they, um -- they complete
each other's sentences.

They've been doing this
for such a long time together.

It's kind of amazing.
I really loved it.

I was like,
how is this going to work?

But we met by, like, a Zoom,
you know?

And then when they started
talking, I was just like, boy,

these guys are great.
-Yeah.

And, so, they fly you
to Australia.

-Yeah.
-So you can make this

very American movie
with an Australian cast.

-All Australian cast,
everybody in there.

A lot of theater people from
local Melbourne theater scene,

some people with
some film and TV experience.

But it was unlike
anything I've ever experienced.

And by the way,
their American dialects,

much better than my own

considering I'm a guy
raised in the Midwest.

Sometimes my voice sounds like,
where is that guy from?

These guys are really accurate.
Incredible dialect.

-'Cause they've studied it,
yeah.

-But beyond that,
what blew my mind

was two of the actors
were last-second castings.

I mean, Laura Gordon, who plays
Dr. June Ross-Mitchell,

she found out she was going to
be playing this role a few days

before we started shooting.

Ian Bliss, who plays
Carmichael Haig, he --

Someone got sick right
before we start shooting.

He jumps into his role, has to
learn sleight-of-hand, magic,

all of his lines.

I was just blown away,
I really was.

It was one of these things
where what

I had to pull off, the hat trick
that I had to try and achieve,

which is like deliver
a believable,

authentic, compelling character
who's troubled

and fragmented, in mourning,

but also
be a late-night talk show host,

but also be a guy who's, like,

experiencing
some supernatural craziness,

to be surrounded by that group
was like, ah,

it was amazing, man.
They were so great.

-But they recreated
this American talk show set.

-Yeah.
-The set is amazing.

And they do it very well.

And for three weeks, you
kind of just lived there, right?

-Just lived in it,
just lived in that space.

-You're there every day.
-Yep.

-And what was that like?

-Like doing a play, you know,
because you're on the same set.

Sorry about -- Whoop. Got poked.
Uh...yeah.

Um, I got into the zone
in a way that I would

when I was doing a play
in Chicago,

and we would do long swaths
of shooting

because they'd have
three cameras set up the way

they would on, like,
an old talk show.

-Oh, yeah.
They made that decision

because TV shows were shot
with three cameras.

So we'll just run
three cameras on the film.

-Yeah. And so our --
our camera team was in wardrobe

because sometimes
they'd get caught on, you know,

on a shot from one
of the other cameras.

So they would have them --

See, guys,
you're all in costume anyway.

But it was pretty great.

You couldn't ask for more
of a dream than that.

And they brought in,
you know,

crew and friends and family
to be in the risers

when I'm trying
to do monologue and bits

and talking to the audience
and...

-Well, I like the Cairnes
brothers because they believe

that "The Texas
Chain Saw Massacre" is

the greatest horror film
ever made.

David, one other thing
I wanted to ask you.

-Yes.
-Did anything spooky, satanic,

devilish happen on that 20-day
grueling schedule on that set?

-I knew you were
going to ask me that question.

That's creepy.

Uh, there were -- there were
some moments

when, I don't know
how you want to describe it.

I'm not -- I'm a science guy.

But I do have this deep desire
to believe in the supernatural.

And there is a moment

when we've got all of
the retrieved artifacts

from the -- that have been
recovered from the burned,

uh, place of the rituals,
and -- and --

and all of a sudden,
the theremin,

which who doesn't love
a good theremin?

-Right?
-Theremin goes off the charts,

and the sound starts
blowing our ears out,

and all of a sudden
the table starts shaking

and all of a sudden
the whole space feels

like something is happening.

Is it an earthquake?
What's going on here?

-Nobody was playing
the theremin?

-Somebody was messing
with the sound on the theremin,

but what I -- what freaked me
out was there was a,

like, walls near us
that there would be no one on --

there couldn't have been
someone on the other side of

and those started pounding
and shaking,

and I noticed it,
and no one else seemed to.

And I said, well,
I'm either going crazy

or I'm so deep into
this character now

that it's really happening

or there's some weird shit going
on here, that freaked me out.

And seeing, again,
Ingrid with the...

[Groans]
-Ingrid was freaky.

-Yeah, I still have nightmares.
-She was freaky.

Okay, David, we are releasing
you into the wild now.

As we go back
to the gnarly part

of "Late Night with the Devil,"
um, Happy Halloween.

Where do you spend Halloween?

-I will be trick
or treating with my kiddos.

I love Halloween.

It is the most special
time of the year.

And you know what
my favorite thing is?

The Halloween episode
of something,

the Halloween episode
of you name it.

I love a good
old Halloween episode,

so I cannot tell you
how thoroughly honored

and excited I am
to be joining you during this

very special holiday.
-Aww.

-Well, we appreciate
that, David.

-That is the spirit.
-Thank you.

-And now we're going to see

how you try to wriggle
out of this situation

as we continue with "Late Night
with the Devil."

-I think I can worm
my way out of it.

-Roll it.
-We'll see.

-You know,
we were talking about --

earlier we were talking
about Dick Cavett,

and most people don't remember
"The Dick Cavett Show" today.

But Dick Cavett did an interview
with William Peter Blatty

when "The Exorcist" book
first came out.

And as a result
of that interview,

the book became a bestseller,

and as a result of
the book becoming a bestseller,

the country got crazed
about the right of exorcism

and everyone was talking
about it,

and the news magazines
were talking about it.

And because the country
got crazed about the right

of exorcism, the movie was
commissioned by Warner Brothers,

and that movie was one
of the most successful openings

in the history of horror,
and people who had never

seen a horror movie
in their lives

did go to see "The Exorcist."

And so all this demon
stuff today comes from that.

If there's no Dick Cavett,
there's no Linda Blair.

-Hmm, hmm.

His Janis Joplin interview
always got my heart, too.

That was a good one.
Love, Dick Cavett.

-Now, Linda Blair in
"Exorcist: Believer,"

that's the work of the devil.

[ Laughter ]

-Ha.

♪

[Static]

[Cheers and applause]

♪

-Welcome back.

Ladies and gentlemen,
before we continue,

I'd like to apologize to anyone
who may have been upset

or offended by what you saw
before the break.

It's not every day
that you see

a demonic possession
on live television.

[Audience talking indistinctly]

Lilly, can you assure everyone
that you're okay?

-Yes.
I'm fine, Jack.

-And do you have
any recollection

of what just happened?

-It's hard to explain.

It's like I'm asleep,
but I'm awake at the same time.

I just try to focus
on June's voice.

I'm sorry if Mr. Wriggles
said anything rude.

-Alright, enough
with all this subterfuge.

May I, Jack?
-Yeah. Oh, please.

Because, you know,

I'm dying to hear you explain
away what we all

just witnessed here.

Let's hear it.

-Let me preface this by saying

that my chief concern is
the welfare,

indeed the sanity
of his younger --

-How dare you?
-I beg your pardon.

-[Scoffs]

Before I became her guardian,

Lilly lived in the cruelest
conditions imaginable.

I studied her.
Yes, I treated her.

But I also gave her two things

I'm sure you're just
as skeptical of --

love and compassion.

Lilly and I are family.

-I can assure you all

there is no demon lurking
inside this child.

Clearly, she has been placed
in a hypnotic state,

then manipulated by the good
doctor to perform her bit.

-Hypnosis?
Then -- Then -- Then

how do you explain the physical
transformations with her skin?

The voice change, there was
banging on the walls.

-She levitated,
for God's sake.

-Granted,
the stagecraft was impeccable.

[Audience booing]

-Do you know what
I think, Car?

-Prey, tell.
-I think that you are

just a self-righteous,
cold-hearted curmudgeon

who's trying to weasel
his way out of parting

with half a million bucks.

[Cheers and applause]

-If you'll allow me,
Jack, I'd like to prove

my thesis
beyond a shadow of doubt.

-Be my guest.

-I'll need a volunteer.
-[Chuckles]

-Thank you, Gus.
[Laughter]

Yes, if you'll join me
center stage.

Could I have those chairs
back here, please?

-Do as you're told, Gus.

-Gus.

[Cheers and applause]

Car, you've got five minutes.

Make 'em count.
-Don't worry, Jack.

What I have in store
should provide a very

fitting climax to your show.

-My wife likes the way my head
sits on my shoulders, Mr. Haig.

I hope you're
not planning to...

-Make it spin?

Oh, I plan to make
everybody's head spin.

[Audience "Oohs"]

-[Sighs]

[Air hissing]

-Could I just have the lights
dimmed, please?

[Switch clicks]

[Chuckles]

Bit of atmosphere never hurt,
did it, Dr. June?

-You know what we say
in TV land.

Where there's smoke, there's
probably a smoke machine.

[Laughter]
-My compliments to the producer.

Okay, Gus.

Are we feeling comfortable?

-Sure.

-I hope everyone
here in the studio

and you at home are
all feeling comfortable, too.

It's important that everyone is
as relaxed as they can be.

Now, I have something here
that I want you all to look at.

Do you think we might be
able to get a close up?

[Watch ticking rapidly]

I will now ask you all
to stare into my watch.

Even you, Jack.

-Got a good shot
on all the studio monitors here.

-I hope our viewers at home
are also paying attention.

Watch carefully.

Round and round
it goes.

With everyone feeling
nice and relaxed.

[Ticking continues]

[Watch dings]

Good.

Now, Gus.
-Hmm?

-Tell me all about this
verminophobia of yours.

-I'm sorry. My -- My what?
-Your morbid fear of worms.

-How do you know about that?

-What is it about them
that's so unsettles you?

-Isn't it obvious?
They're such ugly, slimy things.

No arms, no legs, no eyes.

-Indeed.
Quite grotesque.

And they seem to thrive
wherever it's dark and moist.

The soil, the mud,
the human body even.

-Disgusting.

-Do you realize that
you are now deep in a trance?

-No, sir, I do not.

-A very deep trance.

-Okie dokie.
You're the expert.

-And when I click my fingers,

you will be entirely
under my command.

-Look, this is silly.

I don't think...
[Snaps finger]

-Gus, can you hear me?

-Yes.

-Do you know where you are?

-Here in the studio...

with you.

-You don't feel any different?

-No.

Why should I?

♪

What is that?

Do you hear that?

[Audience whispering]

♪

♪

Jesus, it's hot in here.

♪

Skin's itchy.
[Chuckles]

♪

-You alright, Gus?
-Yeah.

Just, uh, so damn itchy.
[Chuckles]

-Your neck,
it's bleeding.

-I did nicked myself
shaving earlier.

♪

Jeez.

[Audience gasps]

What is that?

Jesus!

-Now, just stay calm.

-No, no, I can feel them.

They're inside me!

Jesus!

[Screaming]

[Audience gasping, groaning]

Oh, God!

[Snaps finger]

[Snaps finger]

Help me, Car.

-Oh, God.

Oh, Jesus Christ.

-[Giggling]

Why is Gus acting so silly?

[Audience shouting indistinctly]

-[Grumbling]
-This wasn't meant to happen.

[Audience shouting]

-[Squealing]

-[Gasps]

-Car.
-Dreamer, here, awake!

How do you feel, Gus?

-Fine. [Chuckles]
Uh, when do we begin?

[Lights thud]

Geez,

When did that happen?

[Indistinct conversations,
laughter]

-You -- You mean
you have no idea.

There were worms all over you.

-Worms?

Oh, God, I hope not.

I hate worms.
[Laughter]

-Okay, Car.
What the hell just happened?

-I did the exact same thing
June did,

just with a tad more
imagination.

You said I used to be the best.

Perhaps I still am.

Now would be
the appropriate time to applaud.

[Light applause]

-You're saying you
just hypnotized all of us?

-Now I'm pretty sure I had

most of you
here in the studio,

and no doubt a number
of our viewers at home.

Fortunately, you're
a suggestible lot.

-What's he talking about,
June?

-He played a mean trick on us,
that's all.

-Leo, can you get
the guys up in videotape

to playback that last bit?

-Yeah, lining it up now.

-Now, if Carmichael's right,
if, then oh, boy.

We're in store for
some very interesting viewing.

-Bravo.
Yes, let's do that.

Best idea you've had all night,
Jack.

-Queuing it up now.
[Tape clicks]

Let's start there.

-You don't feel any different?

-No.

Why should I?

-Because something dreadful
is about to happen.

It's dawning on you.
Hear that?

Ghostly sounds,
anguished moaning from beyond.

-That is not the way
I remember it.

-You're hot.
You're itchy.

It feels like something's
crawling under your skin.

It's hot in here.

[Laughter]

Skin's getting itchy.

-Your neck, it's bleeding.

-I did cut myself
shaving earlier.

What is that?
-Worms.

-Jesus Christ!
-That's right, worms.

Dozens of them,
hundreds out them.

Just stay calm, Gus.

-No, they're inside of me.

I can feel them!
-Show me.

-Get them out!
-They are coming.

-Oh, boy.
-Jesus Christ!

-Okay, let's stop
there.

-I've never been
so embarrassed in my whole life.

[Audience "Awws"]

-Is there anyone who did not see

the worms the first time around?

-I didn't seem them.
-One.

-I didn't see them.
-You did?

Okay, so aside from a couple
of people in the audience,

uh, it looks like you have made
fools of us all once again, Car,

-All in a day's work.

-I did not hypnotize Lilly
or the studio audience

or the viewers at home.
-Oh, come on, Doctor.

You've been caught dead
to rights.

At least America can sleep
a little easier knowing

the Devil's not going to pop
out of their TV screens.

-If Mr. Haig thinks we're
playing a trick on everyone,

then maybe we should look back
at that part

of the show too, Jack.
-Yeah.

-You mean
when Mr. Wriggles joined us?

-Mm-hmm.

You don't think
the television cameras lie,

do you, Mr. Haig?

-No, of course not.

-Jack, please.
Lilly has been through enough.

No.
-Okay, folks, I'm sorry.

Our producers are telling me
that the lovely Ms. Cleo James

is standing by to take us out.

And...

I...just think maybe we should
bring her back at a later date,

because we can't leave
everybody hanging like this.

-Yeah, that's right.
-I'm sorry.

We can no longer take
any part in any of this.

Lilly, we're leaving.

-But we want everyone
to know the truth.

Don't we, June?

-Yeah.
-Standing by, Jack.

-We're staying.
Please?

-Okay, we can start it.
Yeah, right there.

[Tape whirring]
-It's gonna be okay.

-Speak.

-[Demonic voice] You know who
I am, doctor?

[Audience gasping]
-Quiet.

-You say cameras don't lie,
right, Car?

-Who are these people?
What is this?

-There must be
some rational explanation.

-What have you done to me,
Doctor?

My instant team will need
to take these tapes in

for forensic
examination.

-My purpose?

Good to see you again, Jack.
-Sorry.

I-I don't believe
we've been acquainted.

-Don't be a fool.
-Did you see that?

-We go way back.
-I'm sorry. Can you stop it?

Just go back a few seconds.

[Tape rewinding]
Stop!

Okay, go from there,
but very slow please.

[Tape playing in slow motion]

Slower.

[Tape playing slower]

Okay, freeze it there.

-That's just a glitch, Jack.

-No, it's something else.

Now go one frame at a time.

[Tape skipping]

No, no, can you slow it down?

Keep going.

[Feedback]

[Tape skipping]

Minnie?

-My God, it is you.

[Audience talking indistinctly]

You set the whole thing up.

Did you really think
another special appearance

from Madeleine might actually
save your little gabfest?

-You're okay.
-No, no, no, no, no, no.

This -- This -
This makes perfect sense.

-[Sobbing]
-You -- you conspire

with Christou to have him reach
your dead wife.

Throw in a few Grand Guignol
theatrics with these two,

and then top it all

off with some clever
videotape manipulation.

It's genius, Jack.

Cynical, depraved genius.

[Electricity crackling]

Ladies, the encore
is quite unnecessary.

[Indistinct conversations]

-Um, can we get some help here.

-[Sobbing]

-Now!
[Electricity hums]

[Audience gasps]

[Electricity crackling]

♪

♪

-[Gasping]

-[Screaming]

-Time to go, Leo!
-Cut it!

-[Shrieking]

[Audience screaming]

[Cymbals crash, wind gusting]

♪

-The power of Christ
compels you.

The power of Christ --

Gus!

[Audience screaming]

Release to me!

[Gasping]

[Electricity crackles]

[Grunting]

-Glorified God of ungodliness.

I solemnly promise
to worship and obey.

And my before my unholy being!

-[Gasps]

-Oh, fuck.

[Gasping]

♪

-Nothing could happen.

-[Screaming]

♪

-Everybody get out!

♪

Jack, come on. Come on!
Please, please.

[Electricity crackling]

♪

[Wind whistling, feedback]

[Static playing]

♪

[Static]

♪

-Wow.
Just wow.

I mean,
those were some amazing effects.

Is anybody alive?
-Jack's alive.

-Oh, yeah, and
the movie could end right there.

But the Cairnes brothers have
a deeper dive in mind,

so I want to go right back
to the movie.

-[Clears throat]
-What

Before you do that,
we have a surprise.

-A surprise?
-Oh, yeah.

-Oh, no, we don't --
-As you know,

I've been digitizing
your old tapes

and making them available
for everyone online.

-Yes,
and thank you for doing that.

-My pleasure.
-I appreciate it.

-We found the lost
to Joe Bob pilot.

-The lost Joe Bob pilot?

-Oh, yeah.
-No.

-Oh, yeah.
We found the 1981

tape of the show,
"Joe Bob's Groovy

Gruesome Tuesday."
[Laughter]

-You did not?
-Oh, yes, I did.

Austin, will you roll that tape,
please?

-Oh, yeah, with pleasure.
-Ha, ha ha.

♪

♪

♪

♪

-Welcome back
to "Joe Bob's Grisly,

Gruesome, Groovy Great Tuesday
Movie" on cable access 78,

where tonight's
movie is the "Grim Reaper,"

starring Tisa Farrow
and a greasy bum from "Grease."

-Did you say Tisa Farrow?

-Tisa Farrow.

-Does she have big boobs?

[Horn honks]

-No, Delilah.

Tisa Farrow has medium boobs,
like 32 B.

-Aw. Well, that's not...

Alright, I'll take it.

Is there at least
a scary monster in this movie?

-It has a scary monster.
He eats people.

-Oh, yeah.
Alright, let's go.

Let's do it. Let's get.
-It is groovy.

-It is a 2.9
on the Groovy scale.

It will shake you up.
-Huh?

-Just what you need on Tuesday,
which is the night

of "Joe Bob's Great, Grisly,
gruesome, Groovy Tuesday Movie."

-Is that it?

Do you have anything else
to say about the movie?

-That's it.

-I think the -- the fine viewers
of Cable Access 78

probably deserve
a little more than that.

I mean, why don't we
just play the movie?

-Shut up.
-You suck. You suck.

-Shut up.
-You suck. No.

-Shut up.
-No, I will not be muzzled.

-Roll the movie.
-No, no, I'm coming out.

I'm coming - I'm coming out!
Ho!

-Just play the movie.
-Play the movie.

♪

[Laughter]

Oh, my God!

[Laughter]

-Yep. [Laughs]

-Did that ever air anywhere?

-It's did.
Tonight on Shudder.

-The network never
picked that up.

-What shock?

Uh, where's Delilah today?

-In my sock drawer, obviously.

-Well, I. would love
to meet her.

She's an icon.
-Back to the movie.

-[Laughs]
-Darcy, why did you do that?

-Because it had to be done.

I'm going to put it up
on YouTube.

The fans are going
to love seeing

how the show was developed.

-That's not the show.
That's not this show.

That's the --
that's me sitting next

to a sock puppet and babbling.

-I feel like that's
kind of this show.

[Laughter]

It was adorable.

-It's not adorable.
[Laughter]

-It's adorable.

♪

[static]

[Mid-tempo music playing]

♪

♪

-But now here's Mr. Midnight,
Jack Delroy!

[Cheers and applause]

Come on in, Jack.

[Cheers and applause]

[Laughter]

[Indistinct shouting]

-Wha-- How did I get here?

-The same way
you always get here, Jack.

Straight down Fifth
and right on 47th.

[Laughter]

[Dramatic music plays]

♪

You okay, Jack?

[Laughs]

[Laughter]

♪

[Laugher stops]

[Electricity crackling]

♪

♪

-I am sick of that crowd.

Stuck in the cave
all day cooking your

saber-toothed stew while you
and your troglodyte buddies

go out hunting all day long.

[Laughter and applause]

[Wood clatters]

♪

-What the fuck is going on?
[Audience "Oohs"]

-I don't think that's
the line we rehearsed.

-Leo!
[Cheers and applause]

♪

-Oh, where are you going, Jack?

Jack, we're still on air.

Jack?

-Well, I've brought something
really special for you today.

Jack, here she is.

I'll just get her out so
you can have a really good look.

[Worm squealing]
Hello?

-Jesus.
-Here she is.

[Audience "Awws"]

Relax.
Jack, she's perfectly harmless.

-No.
[Worm shrieks]

-Jack and I first met
when I was doing

"Oh! Calcutta"
at the Eden.

My, you should have seen him
blush when he came

backstage and was confronted

with all those glorious
naked bodies.

-[Gasping]

-Remember, darling?

No?

Is that another thing.
you've managed to forget?

-Y-You're dead.

-[Inhales deeply]

[Static,
mid-tempo music playing]

♪

[Music distorting]

♪

[Static]
-Okay, Penelope.

Now give the Wheel of Wonder
a big spin.

Just remember to let go.

Last week, we had a lady
go around for hours and hours.

Spin the wheel.

[Wheel clacking,
rhythmic clapping]

♪

-Switch off your television.
-[Laughs]

-Turn off your TV set.

Stop watching this.

Turn it off!
Turn it off!

Turn it off!

Stop!

[Laughter]

Please.

♪

Stop it!

[Camera shutters clicking,
indistinct shouting]

-Welcome to the family, Jack.

-Jack, Jack. Congratulations
on your ratings win.

What did you have to sacrifice
to get here tonight?

-Ah, Jack Delroy's greatest
sacrifice is yet to come.

[Bell ringing]

♪

♪

♪

♪

-Great show tonight, Jack.

Least a 40 share.

Maybe even a 50.

♪

Come.

♪

♪

-[Grunts]

[Gasps]

-Now, drink up, Jack.

[People howling]

♪

♪

-[Coughs]

♪

[Door slams]

♪

-[Groaning]
[Air pumping]

♪

♪

-There you are.

[Inhales deeply]

Of course wanted -- they
wouldn't let you see me.

♪

They told you
you could have it all.

Didn't they?

Be number one.

Oh, you finally made it,
darling,

but you had to pay a price.

Except Minnie, stage left.

[Gasping]

-I never thought that the...

♪

This all belonged to them.

It still does.

[Gasping]

-It wasn't supposed
to turn out this way.

You have to believe me.

♪

-You're on your own now,
Jack.

♪

-I love you.
[Sobs]

I love you, Minnie.

[Sobbing]

-Then please do this
one last thing for me.

♪

[Squelches]
[Gasps, groaning]

-Pain, please.

Please, you know what to do.

Please.

[Groaning]

♪

Do it!
Do it.

[Groaning]

♪

-[Panting]

♪

[Gasps]

[Groaning]

♪

-[Screams]

[Gasps]

[Gasps]

♪

Dreamer, you're awake.

♪

Dreamer, you're awake.

Dreamer, you're awake.

[Sirens wailing]

Dreamer, you're awake.

D-Dreamer, you're --

[Static, tone playing]

♪

♪

-♪ Write another song
for the money ♪

♪ Something they can sing
that's so funny ♪

♪ Money in the bank
to keep us warm ♪

♪ Roll another joint
for the Gipper ♪

♪ Get the Gipper high,
he gets hipper ♪

♪ Stick it in his mouth
and keep him warm ♪

♪

♪ Elect another jerk
to the White House ♪

♪ Crazy seconds in,
seen a dormouse ♪

♪ Take her off the streets
and keep her home ♪

[Static]

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

[Woman vocalizing]

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

[Static]

-Okay, does that mean he traded
his wife's life for ratings?

Is that what it all
boils down to?

-I'm super sure, honestly.
[Chuckles]

-All that last part,
though, was in his mind, right?

-I think so.
-And so -- so I was right.

Satan is your mind.

-I guess so.

-You know, in 1992,
the BBC aired

a mockumentary
called "Ghost Watch."

-Yeah.
-There was supposedly

a real exorcism on live TV.

The investigators were cleaning
this house full of poltergeists,

and it caused massive
public reaction,

like War of the Worlds,"
you know?

-Yeah.
-And the BBC later apologized.

And so a lot of people ask

if the Cairnes brothers
knew about "Ghost Watch."

But the answer,
they were asked about it,

and they said, no,
they never saw it.

Um, they just said,
we just thought that there was

something slightly dangerous

about late night TV shows
of that era,

and that's why we watched them.
-Nice.

-So "Late Night with the Devil"

was released
in more than a thousand theaters

in March of this year, and on
the first Sunday of its release,

it took in exactly $666,666.

[Laughter]
-I'm sure I did.

-Obviously lie, right?
-Yeah.

-So I'm kind of proud of
our sister company, IFC Films.

They were trying.

They were attempting
a marketing line...

-It was cute.
-...that was so large.

It makes me think there
are a few Roger Corman-type

exploitation guys left
in the world.

They're just not getting it
quite right.

But it did turn out
to be the best opening weekend

in the history of IFC films.

Um, and the one other guy

that I forgot to mention
involved with the creation

of this movie is Matthew Temple,
the cinematographer.

He's an older guy,
and they wanted somebody

who had worked
with studio pedestal cameras

back -- from back in the '80s,

and he found some old
tungsten lighting from that era.

The kind of light bars
that are so hot

you start sweating
after about 30 seconds

of sitting under them, and
they shot with those light bars.

And they also kept three cameras
running on every scene,

with each operator pulling
their own focus

and doing their own zooms

so that they could get
that slightly shaky feel

and reproduce the same shots
that you would have seen

on real late night talk shows
in the '70s.

And when they nailed a scene,

they would say
that shot was terrible,

and they would mean
that as a compliment.

-We should do that.

-Matthew Temple worked
alongside a Otello Stolfo,

the production designer,

and he did an intense study of
all the talk shows of that era,

and he decided to go with
a brown and orange palette,

which I'm sure you
probably noticed.

And he just nailed
the whole vibe of the era.

Quite an achievement,
especially in the art

and the effects departments
of the movie.

Alright, Darcy, what do we
have in the mailbag department?

-We have a really sweet email
from Lucien Dasar of Brooklyn.

-Okay.

"Dear JB, I want to thank you
for your show this season.

My wife and I came down with
a nasty case of Covid in April.

I had rebound Covid
so technically twice, and I was

out of commission for the entire
month of April and most of May.

I was isolated
and sick for weeks on end.

It was horrible."

This doesn't sound like
a sweet mail.

-Just trust.
-"I never felt

so sick in my life.

I am not exaggerating that
the only glimmer of happiness

that I received was watching
'The Last Drive-In' on Fridays."

-There you go.

-That episode
with 'The Toxic Avenger...'

-Yeah.
-...was just so well done

and entertaining,
and people scoffed at me

when I said
I wanted to celebrate

National Grilled Cheese Day."
-Aww. Every year.

-You know, bringing comfort.
-Yes.

-We're bringing comfort
to Covid sufferers.

-Comfort food.
-Anyway, "Thank you

and your crew
for all your hard work

making the show successful.

Very much appreciated
and kept my spirits up.

I hope all is well.
Thank you.

Lucien Dasar, Brooklyn,
New York.

P.S., one last note.

Give Jack Hill some love,

'Switchblade Sisters,'
'Coffy,' 'Foxy Brown,'

'Spider Baby' and 18 more films,

and he is still alive
at age 91."

-That's the main thing
I wanted you to see.

-Alright, Lucien, I --
and thanks for that letter.

I would love to put
some Jack Hill on the show.

He was one of those
Roger Corman directors.

Uh, he went to the Philippines
in the '70s

and -- and shot all those women
in prison films

and blaxploitation films
and that immortal work of art,

"The Swinging Cheerleaders."

Uh, that may be
the best Jack Hill film,

"The Swinging Cheerleaders."

-Ooh, that's a bold stance.
-That's an excellent idea.

And that's it for me,
Joe Bob Briggs

speaking for myself
and Darcy the Mail Girl,

reminding you that to steal an
idea from someone is plagiarism.

But to steal ideas
from many people is research.

And the drive-in will never die.

Man takes his pregnant wife
to the hospital.

Wait, have I -- have I already
told this one on the show?

-Probably.

-Um, alright,
this is a golden oldie.

[Laughter]

--I mean,
there might be three people

that haven't heard it,
so go for it.

-Alright.

-Man takes his pregnant wife
to the hospital

because she's starting labor.

And the doctor looks her over
and he says,

well, it's going to be
a difficult delivery.

So I would like to offer
you an experimental procedure

that we have here.

And he explains how the woman
can be hooked up to a machine

that transfers part
of the pain of childbirth

to the father of the baby,
thus reducing her own pain.

So the father agrees to that.

The doctor warns him, though,

that there is a slight bug
in the machine

that can cause it to amplify
the pain sent to the father

by 10 times,
so if the pain becomes too much,

he should please let
the doctor know.

So the doctor turn --
turns on the machine

and he watches the man,

and the man says he feels
absolutely fine

and so he could take more pain.

And so the doctor turns
the dial up to 40.

Then he turns it up to 60
and he turns it up to 80.

Finally, he's got 100%
of the pain in labor times 10.

And the woman delivers
the baby painlessly,

and the doctor is astonished

that the man
never even flinches

of that much pain being brought
through his body.

And the happy couple takes
the baby home.

And when they get
to their front porch,

there's the mailman, dead.

-Oh, shit.

[Laughter]

I forgot.
That was good, actually.

-Okay.
-Alright.

-Well, yeah,
was it good? I mean --

-Golden oldie.
-Well, let me try again.

-What? No, I like to.

-You like that one?
I didn't get a laugh.

-Try again.
-I didn't get a laugh.

-I fucking laughed.
-Alright.

-Um...

Housewife takes a lover
during the day...

-Okay.
-...while her husband

is at work,
but she's not aware

that her nine-year-old son
is hiding in the closet.

So the husband comes
home unexpectedly one day,

and she tells the lover
to hide in the closet.

So he's in there
with the nine-year-old boy,

and the boy says
"It's dark in here."

The man says, "Yes, it is."

And the boy says,
"I have a baseball."

And the man says, "That's nice."

And the boy says,
"Want to buy it?"

The man says, "No thanks."

And the boy says,
"My dad's outside."

And the man says,
"Okay, how much?"

And the boy says, "$250."

A few weeks pass,
same thing happens again.

The boy and the lover
are in the closet together.

Boy says, "Dark in here."
Man says, "Yes, it is."

Boy says,
"I have a baseball glove."

The guy says, "That's nice."
"Want to buy it."

"No, thanks."
The boy says, "I will tell."

The man says, "Alright,
how much?"

The boy says, "$750."
The man goes, "Fine."

Alright, so a few days later,
the father says to his boy,

"Go grab your glove
and let's go outside

and toss the baseball around."

And the boy says, "I can't.
I sold them."

and the father asked, "Well,
how much did you sell them for?"

The boy says, "$1,000."

And the father says,
"That is terrible.

You overcharged your friends
like that.

That is way more
than those things cost.

I'm going to take you down
to church and make you confess."

And so they go down
to the church,

and the father alerts
the priest,

and they put the kid
in the confession booth

and they close the door, and
the boy says,

"It's dark in here."

And the priest says,
"Do not start that shit again."

[Laughter]

-Good job.

Happy Halloween!
Whoo!

♪

-♪ We are drive-in mutants ♪

-♪ Drive-in mutants ♪

-♪ We are not like
other people ♪

♪ We are sick ♪
-♪ Sick ♪

-♪ We are disgusting ♪
-♪ Disgusting ♪

-♪ We believe in,
we believe in ♪

-♪ Blood ♪

♪ And breasts ♪

♪ And beasts ♪

-♪ Yeah, we believe in ♪

-♪ Blood ♪

♪ And breasts ♪

♪ And beasts ♪

-♪ If life had a vomit meter ♪

♪ We'd be off the scale ♪
-♪ Off the scale ♪

-♪ As long as one drive-in
remains on the planet Earth ♪

♪ We will party like
jungle animals ♪

♪ We will boogie till we puke ♪

-♪ Boogie till we puke ♪

-♪ The drive-in will never die ♪

♪ We will boogie till we puke ♪

-♪ Boogie till we puke ♪

-♪ The drive-in will never die ♪

-♪ We believe in ♪

♪ Blood ♪

♪ And breasts ♪

♪ And beasts ♪

-♪ We believe in ♪

-♪ Blood ♪

♪ And breasts ♪

♪ And beasts ♪

-♪ Yeah, we believe in ♪

♪