Original subtitles

I'm leaving all of Joe's whites 'cause I can't touch those.

Shut up. Shut up.

- What? - He's coming.

He's coming.

All right, I'm all packed up.

You girls get your caboodles, et cetera, put it by the door.

We are getting out of here by 05:45 in the morning.

Joe, there is no way you have everything you needed

for the weekend in that JanSport backpack.

Yeah, I do. I've been to this conference before.

Yeah, but not as a developer of your own game, babe.

Excuse me.

And this game is good.

It's both visually striking and emotionally challenging.

That's from my pro materials, but I'll take it.

Let me ask you a question.

Did you have any trouble

getting past the albino horseman in level six?

Yeah, that was a complicated riddle,

but I figured it out.

Hey, riddle me this, Joe.

With the two things you have shoved in there,

how were you planning an outfit day to night?

Cords go day to night.

Converse day to night.

Couple of shirts for my pit-stain change.

Tom's of Maine deodorant. Which does not work,

by the way. I agree with that.

I like the way you smell.

Hold on just one second.

What is this?

That is my lucky beetlejuice wig.

Okay, there is no professional environment

that requires beetlejuice wig. Hey, Jess.

I say we just leave him alone, 'cause it seems

like he's got it all figured out.

You're right.

He doesn't need a new blazer!

[Screams] We got you a blazer!

Aw, guys, you didn't have to do that.

- We did need to do that. - We did,

But, no matter what happens this weekend,

we just want you to know...

Both: You're already a winner in our book.

Thank you, guys. This is so sweet.

- Oh. - It fits you perfect.

'Scuse me.

I don't understand why I can't come

with you guys to Atlantic city.

Joe's conference is at a casino,

and they don't allow little girls.

Oh, come on. Just put me in a nice dress

and call me a small lady.

Who's gonna call you a liar?

Good point.

She's gonna have a life in crime.

Best Friends Forever 01x06 - "Fatal Blow Out". Original air date 01.06.2012. Series finale!

Sync & corrections by into-the-light, www.addic7ed.com

All right, guys, we're running a little bit early,

so, if anybody needs to pop in,

maybe take a whizz or something.

Jess? Why are you asking me?

No, I probably should. Hey.

I went on some of those gaming blogs you told me about.

People were saying some really nice stuff about your game.

Oh, yeah, thanks.

I'm just trying to create

some early buzz so maybe I can win fan favorite.

Oh, you're gonna win all right.

In more ways than one, my friend.

Yeah. Guys.

It's way too early for that right now.

Guys. Look who I found coming down Rob's stairs.

- Hey, guys. - It's Naya, Lennon.

Naya was in there. I can see that.

Oh, I made you some coffee,

but it looks like you already have some.

What? This crap?

[Clatters]

You know, we didn't think we were gonna get

to see you so early, you know, before you left town.

Yeah, we're trying to spend as much time

as possible together before I have to head to Brazil on Monday.

Oh, I showed Joe and Jess

the rough cut of your documentary.

So good. Oh, God, the native peoples

of the mountains of Brazil.

The richness of the dances.

I'm trying to get this guy to go with me,

but he won't leave his bar.

All right, everybody, let's pile in.

Come in. Last call for the bathroom.

Jessica? Why are you asking me?

I just went.

You know what, I probably should.

How's that coffee treating you?

- It's pretty good. - Yeah?

Mm.

Is it a real rich, deep roast?

Did it get roasted all night long?

- Jessica. - What?

I'm talking about your coffee.

What were you talking about?

The night of passion you spent with our friend Naya?

I'm not talking about this.

Oh, man.

It must be really good

if you won't talk about it. I swear to God, man.

She's a dancer, so we know she's flexible.

- Jess, just stop talking. - She can probably get

into the figure four position.

- What? No. - Your legs are here, and, what, his legs here?

You didn't what?

Nothing.

She stayed over all night, and you didn't have sex?

Then what did you do?

We talked, Jessica.

Okay? We have a lot in common.

We've been... she's been on a lot of adventures like I have.

Give me a Gummi worm.

[Video game sound effects]

Man, the whole landscape changes.

Yeah, it basically goes off string theory.

So now you're in another dimension

that's slightly different from the world you left.

So an infinite amount of things can happen?

Every time you die, the game changes.

That's a Fatal Blowout.

Awesome.

I'm gonna set myself on fire.

Okay.

Hey, where's your blazer?

Oh, all these guys are wearing jean shorts.

A blazer feels too fancy.

Those jean shorts seem to be loving your game.

Yeah, they said they're gonna vote for me.

Yeah.

Excuse me, mister.

Can I play your stupid game?

- Hey, Kurt. - I'm just giving you crap, Joe.

Nice booth. Psyched to play your game.

You know, I already had visits from all the top cos.

You know, Ubisoft, Rockstar, Rocksteady.

You name 'em, they came 'em, baby.

That's great.

I actually have a couple meetings set up myself.

Hey! Hey, Joe. Check this out, man.

You're gonna love this, you maniac.

Look at this. [T-shirt Cannon pops]

Whoo! Wait for it.

[Exclaims]

Carnal Justice. Thanks, man!

Dude's gonna wear that for the rest of his life.

Hey, Kurt, I'm Lennon, Joe's girlfriend.

Ooh, you have beautiful hands.

Do you use industrial-strength lotion?

No. It's just regular.

Just regular.

All right. Handshake's over.

Listen, Josephus, I'm throwing an invite-only foam party tonight.

You coming? Probably not.

Yeah, but probably you will.

I'll put you on the guest list.

You should come too.

Don't forget those little monkey paws of yours, okay?

- What? - There's gonna be lots

of 'nanners at that foam party for you to grab.

All right, got to roll. This weekend gonna be cray-cray.

Somebody, pick that up.

That guy is the worst.

Why does he say everything twice?

Right?

Maybe I should put my blazer back on.

Hey, Jess.

Yeah, hey, a t-shirt just hit me

right in the face. Okay, can you find Rav

and get that extra console for Joe?

Yeah. What's going on?

I'm worried that no one is going to vote for Joe's game.

Everybody here is handing out all this free stuff,

and all he brought was his game

and a statue of me with giant boobs.

Should we make a target run?

It's too late for that, Jess.

He put back on his blazer.

Okay, I'm gonna go get the extra console.

I want you to do some recon.

Find out what these nerds are buzzing about, all right?

And then we'll make a plan. Okay.

In the meantime, who do we know who could sit

at a computer and vote all day?

And we're in.

Oh, thank you so much, Q.

How many times I got to tell you to keep smiling,

keep shining, 'cause you can always count on me?

I know. So just vote as many times

as you can for Joe's game. You got it.

Now, let me hack into the Atlanticon mainframe

and see which game is in the lead.

Okay, Q, I don't think that's a good idea.

Gotta go. [Hangs up]

- Did you press the button? - What?

- The button. Did you press it? - Oh, no. Yes.

No, I didn't. I'm pressing it now.

- You okay? - Yeah.

No, I'm fine. I just...

I think I had some bad Gummi worms.

After you.

What is this laundry?

All right, here, I'll take...

- no, I got that. I got that. - I can't carry that.

Stop... what are you doing?

- I'm not doing anything. - Stop kissing me.

You kissed me.

Okay, seriously, stop it.

- You need to stop it. - No, don't do it again.

One more time.

[Elevator bell dings]

Okay.

Okay.

{Pub}- Hey, Q, what's the 411?

How's Joe's game doing in the polls?

Lennon, it is not looking good.

What do you mean? Who's winning?

Carnal Justice: Final Reckoning.

That's Kurt.

I don't know what the guy's doing, but it is a landslide.

Well, how far behind are we?

Honey, it is over as far as I'm concerned.

Well, keep voting. Are you voting?

Come on. I set up a program.

I don't even have to touch the keyboard.

Then what are you still doing in our apartment?

Gotta go!

Glad you liked it.

Vote for me, man.

Len, today went great.

People are really into my game I think.

Yeah, it's 'cause your game is the best thing here.

Babe. I love you.

So I was thinking

maybe we should check out that foam party tonight.

What? No.

No, I'm just gonna grab a drink

with some of the guys I used to work with,

and then Rav and I are gonna hit the casino.

Okay, but aren't those parties

kind of important for networking?

No. Lennon, all the networking

that needed to happen happened today in this booth.

Okay? Okay.

Both: Hey.

- What's wrong? - Nothing.

Then get your bathing suit. We're going to a foam party.

[Chatter]

- Hello. - Hi.

Oh, no.

God, I'm afraid I'm gonna get touched.

I think I'm getting a yeast infection, Lennon.

Hello, ladies.

Enjoying dat foam?

I'm sorry, but I can't see your face.

Heading your way. Follow my voice.

Oh, it's Kurt.

Thank you, babies.

Thank you, Kyle.

Thank you.

Hey.

You don't need to be wearing those tops if you're in the foam.

- No, we always need tops. - No, we do need tops.

You sure? 'Cause I'm hearing

from a lot of the girls that the foam

feels really good on their boobs.

Yeah, we'll take their word for it.

Yeah, we prefer our boobs dry.

So, in a choice between dry boobs and wet boobs...

We're gonna take the dry one every time, man.

- All right, your loss. - All right, buddy.

If you're interested, I can get you

a Carnal Justice beer koozie.

All: Carnal Justice! Carnal Justice!

I love you.

You're my maniacs. Hey, where's Joe?

Oh, he couldn't make it. He's networking.

Good, 'cause that, like, whole "above it all" attitude

he's got is just suicidal.

All right, ladies. Help yourselves to everything,

and by everything, I mean my...

- we got it, Kurt. - Okay.

Bye-bye! Foam!

Jessica, that guy is gonna win fan favorite.

What are you talking about? The guy's an idiot.

No, when I did my recon earlier,

I asked around, and everybody said

whoever throws the best party wins fan favorite.

But Joe's game is the best.

It doesn't matter, Jessica.

He can't compete with this.

Excuse me.

Excuse me. I'm sorry. Excuse me.

Excuse me. No, I'm not...

I don't want to do this with you right now.

I'm sorry. Excuse me.

[Chatter]

I don't know, Lennon, there are a lot of people

out here that are not in the foam party.

Well, yeah, I imagine that'd be a nerd's nightmare.

You know what, hold on one second.

Excuse me.

Can I ask you guys why you're not in the foam party?

Adrian doesn't like to be touched,

pat is scared of the dark, Kimmy is prone to rashes,

and I... I don't like foam.

Gotcha. Thank you so much.

Okay, here's the deal.

There is clearly an underserved population of nerds here.

So order up a couple foot-longs,

'cause we're having ourselves a nerd party.

[Chatter]

Len, Len? Yeah?

I'm gonna refresh the foot-long sub,

but should I turn the lights down?

Oh, no, no, no. Keep them as high as possible.

Nerds love fluorescents. Okay.

- Did you turn the TV off? - Yeah.

Nobody likes TV on at a party.

They absolutely do. Put on Mythbusters, A&E, History Channel.

Oh, I feel like the Jane goodall of the nerds.

You know, observing them in their natural habitat.

It's exciting.

Can you ladies settle a dispute?

- Oh, sure. - Yeah, of course.

Kieran, was it? Yes.

You know, just FYI, Fatal Blowout sponsored this party.

Oh, I played that earlier today.

I very much enjoyed it.

We're playing Werewolf, and I've been named

both Werewolf and Watchman,

and that seems like quite the conundrum.

Well, you know what I would think

would really solve your problem, Kier?

Are some Harry Potter shots!

[Cheers]

All right.

All: Expelliarmus!

[Cheers and applause]

Yes!

You did it!

Die.

You shall not pass.

[Laughter]

You're dead. I killed you.

So you're dead.

What's up, buddy?

- What's going on here? - Oh, man.

This is a nerd party, Rav.

Sponsored by the most fatal of blowouts.

I can see that.

What are you doing here?

- Um... - Release your drawbridge, sir!

[Laughs] Yeah!

Dude, you stabbed my friend!

This is just a little too much for me right now.

I think I'm gonna go. Don't you want to stay

for a Harry Potter shot? Lennon!

She puts cinnamon on it, and it explodes.

Nah. I'm good.

I'm gonna... I'm gonna go.

Okay.

Um, what is Rav doing

coming to your room in the middle of the night?

Um, 'cause I kissed him in the freight elevator.

Wait, what? You kissed him?

- Yes. - What happened?

I don't know. There was laundry, and then I fell, he caught me,

then we kissed.

Well, what kind of kiss was it?

- A hard one. - Like a hot, hard one?

Oh, yeah, it was like this on me, right?

- Show me on your hand, Jessica. - You need to see it

to experience what I was feeling.

If you show me on my face,

then these nerds' penises will go insane.

Jessica, come on.

[Both shouting]

Stop.

This kiss was sponsored by Fatal Blowout.

Yes!

All: Fatal Blowout!

Fatal Blowout! Fatal Blowout!

Oh, no.

{Pub}And this award was sponsored by Blast Energy Drink.

Is he still mad at us?

- I think so. - Yes, I'm still mad at you.

Babe, we were just trying to help.

I didn't need any help. And I asked you not to.

Well, you didn't actually say those words, so...

You know, when a friend tries to help...

Stop talking.

Congratulations to Sylvester Willis

and his game Penguin Problems

for best family animation, hmm?

[Applause]

[Chuckles]

And now the award we've all been waiting for...

Fan Favorite.

Fatal Blowout.

[Cheers and applause]

No!

Thank you, guys. This is awesome.

I really appreciate it, and it means so much

because it's from the fans.

Thank you so much.

Hey, and thank you so much

fol that hot girl-on-girl action at your party last night.

Right? [Laughs]

You could learn from that, Penguin Problems.

Oh, my God, babe, you won.

No, I didn't. You guys did.

Babe, wait..

I told you I knew what I was doing,

and you thought you knew better.

- But you won. - Did I?

Or was it the embarrassing party you guys threw on my behalf?

No, it was your game.

Well, I guess we'll never know.

You should have just left it alone.

- I... - I got to get some air.

Babe.

Hey. Jess.

Oh, hey, I can't really talk right now, okay?

We have to talk. What's going on?

I don't know what's going on.

What happened? What was that?

Look, you... we're old friends,

and you're just freaking out because you have feelings for Naya.

- I'm freaking out? - Yes. That must be what it is.

So none of that was you kissing me back?

All right, when some...

- Yes or no? - I don't know, okay?

I don't know. I don't know.

Never mind.

Maybe you're on the boardwalk.

I don't know. But you didn't have a coat on,

so will you please call me?

Hey, Queenetta, I can't talk right now, okay?

Do you have a dustbuster?

Wait, you're still in our apartment?

I went home to sleep last night, 'cause you went out

of cornnuts, but this morning I came back in

to check on the voting. Yeah, Joe won.

I know. You're welcome.

Thank you, Q. Now I really have to go.

So I kicked back on Joe's inflatable wobbles chair,

but I think I had some tacks in my pocket,

because that thing exploded.

Oh, that's okay. Accidents happen.

But then I was so scared you'd be mad,

so I knocked down a bunch of stuff

so it would look like a burglary.

Okay, Queenetta, I need you

to leave our apartment right now, okay?

And lock the door behind you. Gotta go!

[Sighs]

[Cell phone rings]

Joe?

Hey, buddy, you gonna pick that up?

Probably just gonna let it go to voicemail.

Can you please let me in?

[Door unlocks]

Babe, I'm really sorry.

I should have left it alone.

I just was worried that no one...

Didn't think my game was good enough.

What?

No, babe, what are you... are you crazy?

Your game is amazing.

There's, like, a thousand people in there that all they do

is this, and they can't stop talking about it.

This is what you were born to do.

Are you kidding me?

That's why we did it, 'cause I believe in you so damn much.

I have to say, I, uh, I've never seen

that many happy nerds in my entire life.

I'm kind of like the nerd whisperer, right?

Do you forgive me?

Guys?

Could I come in?

Oh, man, this is just where I want to be right now.

Oh, God, Joe, I am so sorry.

If it makes you feel any better, I just ruined my life again.

- Did you talk to Rav? - Wait, what happened?

- She and Rav kissed. - Rav and I kissed.

Okay, I'm getting out of the tub.

No, Joe, we're all in the tub now.

What happened?

I don't know.

I think he has feelings for Naya, you know,

and he's scared, and it just... I was there.

'Cause, I mean, it's not like he cares about me like that.

Jess, I never told you this before,

but, after Rav punched Peter at your wedding

and you guys got in that huge fight...

Mm-hmm.

Rav disappeared for, like, a whole year.

I didn't even know where he was.

I think he was just so destroyed 'cause he thought he lost you.

So I don't think it's 'cause he doesn't have feelings for you.

Well, what do I do now?

- Go talk to him. - Yeah, that's a good idea.

Okay. [Screams]

[All scream] Oh, my God.

So wet.

- Go, go, go. - Oh, Joe.

I'm glad I caught you.

I'm Annie Heller, VP at Phoenix Games.

I know who you are.

I am a big fan of your game.

Everyone at Phoenix is obsessed with it.

Babe, I told you.

Why don't you call me on Monday

so we can talk about working on it together?

If that's okay.

That's totally okay. Awesome.

Oh, and sorry I missed your party.

I don't really do that kind of thing.

Well, don't let me keep you.

It looked like you were chasing someone.

- Thank you. - Okay. Buh-bye.

Thank you. Thank you!

This is it. This is it.

Where is he? Len?

Okay, I'll check the casino.

Babe, have you heard from him?

[Knocking at door] Wait, he texted me.

What?

He left.

He went to Brazil with Naya.

Hey, hey, hey.

We'll figure it out. Okay?

Okay.

- I think I messed up, Len. - No. No, no.

Okay.

My butt feels very wet.

I know. All our butts are wet.

- Yeah. - I know.

I love you guys.

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