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1
00:00:00,400 --> 00:00:01,680
[snoring]
[clock ringing]
2
00:00:01,840 --> 00:00:04,840
[upbeat music]
3
00:00:29,560 --> 00:00:31,520
[cheerful music]
4
00:00:32,600 --> 00:00:34,280
[Garfield yawning]
5
00:00:35,480 --> 00:00:37,080
What a great morning.
6
00:00:37,240 --> 00:00:41,600
It's not Monday
and I got my usual 19 hours of sleep.
7
00:00:41,760 --> 00:00:43,640
And Jon has breakfast ready.
8
00:00:43,840 --> 00:00:48,200
The only thing that could possibly ruin
this day is if Nermal shows up.
9
00:00:51,200 --> 00:00:55,160
As I was saying, the only thing
that could possibly ruin this day
10
00:00:55,320 --> 00:00:57,200
is if Nermal shows up.
11
00:00:57,720 --> 00:00:59,320
[intriguing music]
12
00:01:01,640 --> 00:01:02,640
Where's Nermal?
13
00:01:02,800 --> 00:01:04,240
[stage manager] He's not here.
14
00:01:04,800 --> 00:01:07,160
-What?
-He's not here.
15
00:01:07,360 --> 00:01:08,640
What do you mean?
16
00:01:08,800 --> 00:01:11,240
Didn't he get a copy
of this episode's script?
17
00:01:11,400 --> 00:01:13,200
Right here on page one.
18
00:01:13,360 --> 00:01:16,040
I say: "The only thing
that could ruin this day
19
00:01:16,200 --> 00:01:17,480
is if Nermal shows up."
20
00:01:17,640 --> 00:01:19,080
Then he walks in and says:
21
00:01:19,240 --> 00:01:23,840
"Yes, Garfield, it's me,
the cutest kitty cat in the whole world."
22
00:01:24,000 --> 00:01:25,200
Blah, blah, blah!
23
00:01:25,360 --> 00:01:26,400
So, where is he?
24
00:01:26,600 --> 00:01:29,880
Remember the last episode?
You mailed him to Abu Dhabi.
25
00:01:30,080 --> 00:01:30,880
Oh, right.
26
00:01:31,040 --> 00:01:32,240
[chuckling]
27
00:01:32,400 --> 00:01:36,080
That was good. So, I guess we can't do
this script, right?
28
00:01:36,280 --> 00:01:39,320
Guess not.
Ok, everyone. Let's strike the set.
29
00:01:39,520 --> 00:01:40,480
[ringing]
30
00:01:42,600 --> 00:01:44,640
[soft music]
31
00:01:44,800 --> 00:01:46,160
[whimpering]
32
00:01:46,360 --> 00:01:47,960
We're not doing the script.
33
00:01:48,160 --> 00:01:49,960
[whining]
34
00:01:50,160 --> 00:01:52,920
No. I'm trying to figure out
how we can entertain
35
00:01:53,120 --> 00:01:55,480
all these people who are watching us.
36
00:01:55,640 --> 00:01:56,520
[whimpering]
37
00:01:57,360 --> 00:01:58,320
Ta-dah!
38
00:02:04,160 --> 00:02:06,240
No, we're not doing that either.
39
00:02:06,440 --> 00:02:07,440
[whining]
40
00:02:07,640 --> 00:02:11,800
We're going to answer
some of my mountains of fan mail.
41
00:02:12,000 --> 00:02:15,120
Could I have one mountain
of my fan mail, please?
42
00:02:15,320 --> 00:02:16,120
Coming up!
43
00:02:16,280 --> 00:02:21,360
Postman, could we have a mountain
of fan mail for Mr. Garfield, please?
44
00:02:22,120 --> 00:02:23,800
[panting]
45
00:02:23,960 --> 00:02:25,640
Here's your mountain.
46
00:02:26,920 --> 00:02:31,040
Herman, If you're going to be on camera
here, we need to touch up your makeup.
47
00:02:31,240 --> 00:02:32,240
Don't touch me.
48
00:02:32,400 --> 00:02:34,280
You always do terrible things to me,
49
00:02:34,440 --> 00:02:36,920
secret trap doors,
flinging me over the house,
50
00:02:37,080 --> 00:02:40,280
putting live cows in my mail truck.
51
00:02:40,480 --> 00:02:42,560
Oh, but that's just on the show.
52
00:02:42,720 --> 00:02:46,680
In real life, you don't like
to torment mailmen, do you?
53
00:02:48,120 --> 00:02:50,040
All right, then. Go ahead.
54
00:02:54,520 --> 00:02:55,320
Perfect.
55
00:02:55,520 --> 00:02:59,240
Thanks. I should learn to trust you more.
56
00:03:01,120 --> 00:03:04,200
Ok, Odie! Grab a letter at random.
57
00:03:04,360 --> 00:03:05,480
[yipping]
58
00:03:05,680 --> 00:03:07,680
[whining]
59
00:03:07,840 --> 00:03:08,840
Ta-dah!
60
00:03:09,040 --> 00:03:10,040
Thanks, Odie.
61
00:03:10,200 --> 00:03:13,480
"Dear Garfield, when will you stop
giving that poor mailman
62
00:03:13,640 --> 00:03:15,800
a hard time, you mangy cat?"
63
00:03:15,960 --> 00:03:17,960
Signed: The National Mailman's Union.
64
00:03:18,120 --> 00:03:21,000
Oops. Wrong address. That wasn't for me.
65
00:03:21,200 --> 00:03:23,000
Let's move on to the next one.
66
00:03:23,200 --> 00:03:26,320
"Dear Garfield, would you share
your lasagna with me?"
67
00:03:26,480 --> 00:03:27,960
No. Next.
68
00:03:29,040 --> 00:03:30,440
Ah, here we go.
69
00:03:30,600 --> 00:03:34,440
"Dear Garfield,
I have this assignment for school.
70
00:03:34,600 --> 00:03:37,200
What is the difference
between cats and dogs?
71
00:03:37,360 --> 00:03:39,200
I wondered if you could help me."
72
00:03:39,360 --> 00:03:41,000
Signed: Damian.
73
00:03:41,160 --> 00:03:42,760
"P.S.: I love your work."
74
00:03:42,920 --> 00:03:45,760
Thank you, Damian. I love my work, too.
75
00:03:46,400 --> 00:03:50,680
All right, kids. No talking or texting
in the classroom, got it? Good.
76
00:03:50,840 --> 00:03:51,880
Here we go.
77
00:03:52,960 --> 00:03:56,400
Here we see the dumbest creature
in the entire animal kingdom:
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00:03:56,560 --> 00:03:57,520
a dog.
79
00:03:58,520 --> 00:03:59,840
[barking]
80
00:04:00,040 --> 00:04:04,120
I said no talking in the classroom.
That includes barks of disapproval.
81
00:04:04,280 --> 00:04:09,520
And here is the finest living thing
that ever existed, a true marvel,
82
00:04:09,680 --> 00:04:10,800
a cat.
83
00:04:10,960 --> 00:04:12,240
[cheering and applause]
84
00:04:12,400 --> 00:04:15,160
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
You're too kind.
85
00:04:15,360 --> 00:04:17,480
[applause continues]
86
00:04:18,840 --> 00:04:20,320
Thanks, Rosie. That's enough.
87
00:04:20,480 --> 00:04:22,960
Here's the next part of our lesson.
88
00:04:23,120 --> 00:04:24,960
Hi guys! I'm home.
89
00:04:25,160 --> 00:04:27,600
This person feeds the cat and the dog
90
00:04:27,760 --> 00:04:32,080
and has somehow deluded himself
into believing he is their master.
91
00:04:32,240 --> 00:04:35,320
Observe how each of the pets reacts
when he comes home.
92
00:04:35,520 --> 00:04:40,040
The dog becomes hysterical and noisy
and slobbers all over his feeder.
93
00:04:41,440 --> 00:04:43,040
Ridiculous, isn't it?
94
00:04:43,240 --> 00:04:45,560
Let's look at the same scene with a cat.
95
00:04:45,720 --> 00:04:50,840
Notice how unlike the dog,
the cat remains cool, calm and collected.
96
00:04:51,000 --> 00:04:52,600
Big fat hairy deal.
97
00:04:52,760 --> 00:04:58,360
Notice the cool, calm and collected cat
is cool, calm and collected.
98
00:04:58,520 --> 00:05:02,880
He doesn't make a ridiculous fool
out of himself like certain dogs do.
99
00:05:03,080 --> 00:05:05,520
[growling]
100
00:05:05,720 --> 00:05:07,560
What do you mean there's more?
101
00:05:07,720 --> 00:05:09,600
I showed the important part.
102
00:05:09,760 --> 00:05:12,480
No, I am not going
to show the rest of the scene.
103
00:05:12,640 --> 00:05:13,800
Hey! No!
104
00:05:14,000 --> 00:05:15,600
How's my furry friend today?
105
00:05:15,800 --> 00:05:20,320
[purring] Oh, meow, meow!
106
00:05:20,520 --> 00:05:22,680
He wuvs having his widdle tummy rubbed.
107
00:05:22,840 --> 00:05:25,480
Yes, you do. Yes, you do.
108
00:05:25,640 --> 00:05:26,640
[sounds of ecstasy]
109
00:05:26,840 --> 00:05:30,040
Who's a good widdle kitty?
Who's a good widdle kitty?
110
00:05:32,280 --> 00:05:35,360
Don't stop! Don't stop! Don't stop!
111
00:05:35,520 --> 00:05:38,040
All right, enough of this! Stop! Cut!
112
00:05:38,680 --> 00:05:40,880
[snickering]
113
00:05:41,040 --> 00:05:43,480
Oh, so you think you made me look bad,
do you?
114
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[whimpering]
115
00:05:44,600 --> 00:05:47,840
Well, you did.
Now it's my turn to make you look bad.
116
00:05:48,040 --> 00:05:51,240
You all know that stupid game
called "fetch the stick"?
117
00:05:51,400 --> 00:05:55,480
Well, here's what happens
when you ask a dog to fetch the stick.
118
00:05:55,680 --> 00:05:56,800
Want to fetch, Odie?
119
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[yipping]
120
00:05:58,560 --> 00:06:00,640
Ok, Odie. Go fetch the stick.
121
00:06:00,800 --> 00:06:02,960
[happily barking]
122
00:06:05,160 --> 00:06:06,080
[happily barking]
123
00:06:06,280 --> 00:06:08,680
Good boy. You want me to throw it again?
124
00:06:15,440 --> 00:06:16,840
[Garfield] Dogs not only fetch,
125
00:06:17,000 --> 00:06:19,680
they insist on fetching the stick.
126
00:06:19,840 --> 00:06:21,280
[whimpering]
127
00:06:27,640 --> 00:06:29,000
[yipping]
128
00:06:29,160 --> 00:06:29,960
Again.
129
00:06:41,280 --> 00:06:42,520
[romantic music]
130
00:06:42,720 --> 00:06:44,160
And again.
131
00:06:51,320 --> 00:06:53,480
See? Utterly pointless.
132
00:06:54,600 --> 00:06:56,880
What will a cat do when the guy
who feeds him...
133
00:06:57,040 --> 00:07:00,360
Not enough I might add.
...throws a stick?
134
00:07:00,560 --> 00:07:02,920
[cheerful music]
135
00:07:03,120 --> 00:07:04,800
Want to fetch, Garfield?
136
00:07:05,000 --> 00:07:05,840
No.
137
00:07:06,040 --> 00:07:08,360
Ok, Garfield. Go fetch the stick.
138
00:07:08,800 --> 00:07:09,720
[sighing]
139
00:07:09,920 --> 00:07:12,200
Come on, Garfield! Fetch!
140
00:07:12,400 --> 00:07:14,840
[Garfield] No matter
how many times he is asked,
141
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the cat will not waste his time
fetching the stick.
142
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Just fetch the stick. Go fetch the stick.
143
00:07:21,960 --> 00:07:25,320
Please fetch the stick.
It's just one little stick.
144
00:07:25,480 --> 00:07:28,360
You just go, you get the stick,
you bring it back.
145
00:07:28,520 --> 00:07:30,320
How much time could that take?
146
00:07:30,480 --> 00:07:32,040
The cat won't fetch the stick
147
00:07:32,200 --> 00:07:35,120
because he knows
there's no point in fetching a stick
148
00:07:35,320 --> 00:07:38,640
unless it's got, like,
a lollipop attached to it.
149
00:07:38,840 --> 00:07:41,840
Please fetch the stick.
Please, please fetch the stick.
150
00:07:42,000 --> 00:07:44,680
I just want you to fetch the stick. Here.
151
00:07:44,880 --> 00:07:46,400
Like this. See?
152
00:07:46,560 --> 00:07:48,720
It's not so hard. Anyone can do it.
153
00:07:48,920 --> 00:07:52,360
Hey, if you wanted the stick,
you shouldn't have thrown it away.
154
00:07:54,720 --> 00:07:57,040
And continuing on the same topic,
155
00:07:57,200 --> 00:08:01,240
here's a letter from Sam Funnyname
from Made-Up Place, Nebraska.
156
00:08:01,400 --> 00:08:04,280
He asks:
"What do cats and dogs do all day?"
157
00:08:04,440 --> 00:08:06,080
Well, Mr. Funnyname...
158
00:08:06,280 --> 00:08:07,720
[Garfield] Cats sleep.
159
00:08:07,880 --> 00:08:09,640
[snoring]
160
00:08:09,840 --> 00:08:11,480
Dogs chase their tails.
161
00:08:11,640 --> 00:08:12,600
[barking]
162
00:08:12,800 --> 00:08:14,120
Cats eat.
163
00:08:14,920 --> 00:08:16,560
Dogs chase their tails.
164
00:08:16,720 --> 00:08:17,560
[barking]
165
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Cats sleep.
166
00:08:18,760 --> 00:08:20,880
[snoring]
167
00:08:21,040 --> 00:08:22,840
Dogs chase their tails.
168
00:08:23,000 --> 00:08:24,160
[barking]
169
00:08:25,560 --> 00:08:26,800
Do they catch them?
170
00:08:27,000 --> 00:08:29,320
Oh, that's the best part. Watch.
171
00:08:29,480 --> 00:08:31,680
[barking]
172
00:08:35,400 --> 00:08:37,400
[suspenseful music]
173
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[siren wailing]
174
00:08:39,000 --> 00:08:42,000
[yowling in pain]
175
00:08:42,720 --> 00:08:44,800
[Garfield] Meanwhile, cats eat.
176
00:08:45,000 --> 00:08:49,200
Well, Odie, I think I've made my point.
Odie? Odie?
177
00:08:49,400 --> 00:08:51,560
[whining]
178
00:08:52,880 --> 00:08:54,560
"Dear Odie..."
179
00:08:54,720 --> 00:08:56,240
[yipping]
180
00:08:57,000 --> 00:09:01,640
"My mother says cats are much cleaner
than dogs, but I think dogs are cleaner.
181
00:09:01,800 --> 00:09:03,320
Which of us is right?"
182
00:09:03,520 --> 00:09:04,800
[whining]
183
00:09:05,000 --> 00:09:10,160
I'll handle this. Your mother is right.
Mothers are always right.
184
00:09:10,360 --> 00:09:13,160
[Garfield] The dog
is a notoriously filthy creature.
185
00:09:13,320 --> 00:09:16,760
Watching a dog rolling in mud
is a revolting sight.
186
00:09:20,480 --> 00:09:21,680
[screaming]
187
00:09:22,640 --> 00:09:25,560
Odie! Bad dog! Bad filthy dog!
188
00:09:25,760 --> 00:09:26,680
Look what you did.
189
00:09:26,840 --> 00:09:29,440
Why can't you be as clean as Garfield?
190
00:09:29,600 --> 00:09:32,080
He's always clean and spotless.
191
00:09:32,280 --> 00:09:35,920
See? What do you have to say to that,
grimy one?
192
00:09:36,080 --> 00:09:37,800
[growling]
193
00:09:37,960 --> 00:09:40,320
Play more of the scene? No.
194
00:09:40,480 --> 00:09:42,360
There's nothing more to see. It's--
195
00:09:43,600 --> 00:09:47,080
Yes, I am always so clean and spotless.
196
00:09:47,240 --> 00:09:48,040
[doorbell ringing]
197
00:09:48,200 --> 00:09:51,360
The door! Could it be? It is!
198
00:09:51,560 --> 00:09:53,800
[action music]
199
00:09:54,000 --> 00:09:56,320
Delivery from Vito's Pizzeria.
200
00:09:57,440 --> 00:09:58,680
Yes!
201
00:09:59,600 --> 00:10:04,280
[wild slobbering eating sounds]
202
00:10:06,920 --> 00:10:10,160
Remember I said I wished
you could be as clean as Garfield?
203
00:10:10,320 --> 00:10:11,880
[whining]
204
00:10:12,040 --> 00:10:13,560
Forget I said that.
205
00:10:14,680 --> 00:10:18,400
Ok. So maybe I'm not the most
delicate eater in the world.
206
00:10:18,560 --> 00:10:20,640
There's the understatement of the year.
207
00:10:20,840 --> 00:10:23,600
Nermal! Where have you been?
208
00:10:23,800 --> 00:10:24,720
Where did you send me?
209
00:10:25,440 --> 00:10:26,440
Abu Dhabi.
210
00:10:26,640 --> 00:10:28,640
Then that's where. Where's the set?
211
00:10:28,800 --> 00:10:30,200
What about the script?
212
00:10:30,360 --> 00:10:33,400
We had to cancel that script
because you weren't here.
213
00:10:34,320 --> 00:10:36,720
I've been answering my fan mail instead.
214
00:10:36,920 --> 00:10:39,800
Fan mail? You get fan mail?
215
00:10:40,000 --> 00:10:44,480
Of course I get fan mail.
I get lots of fan mail. See?
216
00:10:44,680 --> 00:10:46,560
That's awesome, Garfield.
217
00:10:46,720 --> 00:10:49,280
Hey, I want to answer
some of my fan mail, too.
218
00:10:49,440 --> 00:10:52,200
Could I have my fan mail, please?
219
00:10:52,360 --> 00:10:55,600
[stage manager] Postman!
Bring Nermal's fan mail to the stage.
220
00:10:56,240 --> 00:10:59,000
Betcha Nermal
doesn't get fan mail like us.
221
00:10:59,160 --> 00:11:00,720
[snickering]
222
00:11:00,920 --> 00:11:02,880
[motor revving]
223
00:11:06,680 --> 00:11:09,000
[intriguing music]
224
00:11:17,040 --> 00:11:19,040
Everybody loves me!
225
00:11:20,200 --> 00:11:22,440
With two exceptions.
226
00:11:24,640 --> 00:11:26,960
Don't you touch me, Garfield!
227
00:11:27,120 --> 00:11:29,600
You're going back to Abu Dhabi, Nermal!
228
00:11:30,400 --> 00:11:33,360
Let's see how much fan mail
you get there, Nermal.
229
00:11:33,520 --> 00:11:34,640
[screaming]
230
00:11:34,800 --> 00:11:35,840
[lively music]
231
00:11:36,720 --> 00:11:39,880
Well, I guess that's the end
of this episode.
232
00:11:40,040 --> 00:11:42,080
If you enjoyed it, do me a favor,
233
00:11:42,240 --> 00:11:46,040
don't write a fan letter,
send an email instead.
234
00:11:46,200 --> 00:11:48,360
I don't have to carry those.
235
00:11:49,280 --> 00:11:50,960
I really liked it.
236
00:11:51,120 --> 00:11:56,520
Finally, we had an episode of this show
where I didn't wind up looking foolish.
237
00:11:57,280 --> 00:11:59,280
[upbeat music]
238
00:12:18,600 --> 00:12:20,760
Subtitling: ECLAIR
16848
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