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1
00:00:01,194 --> 00:00:04,265
- We've constructed
a paradise here...
2
00:00:04,266 --> 00:00:06,992
but the world
is still the world.
3
00:00:06,993 --> 00:00:08,752
- Defib!
- I don't have a pulse.
4
00:00:08,753 --> 00:00:11,341
- Max. He's gone.
5
00:00:11,342 --> 00:00:13,999
- I spoke to the captain,
and if you wanted.
6
00:00:14,000 --> 00:00:15,828
if you decided that you
would like to be an M.D.,
7
00:00:15,829 --> 00:00:18,245
he will support you
for a full scholarship.
8
00:00:18,246 --> 00:00:20,316
♪
9
00:00:20,317 --> 00:00:22,007
- It was never real.
10
00:00:22,008 --> 00:00:24,285
I was never in love with Avery
to begin with.
11
00:00:24,286 --> 00:00:27,944
- I think I just heard you
give me your inherent blessing.
12
00:00:27,945 --> 00:00:29,152
Is it a bad idea?
13
00:00:29,153 --> 00:00:31,224
- Sleeping with a subordinate?
14
00:00:32,122 --> 00:00:34,985
- Alright, you scallywags.
15
00:00:34,986 --> 00:00:38,128
The heat's on. Bets are in.
Let's draw.
16
00:00:39,543 --> 00:00:41,992
- If this were
Settlers of Catan,
17
00:00:41,993 --> 00:00:44,202
I'm telling you...
whole different story.
18
00:00:44,203 --> 00:00:45,479
- Mm-hmm.
19
00:00:45,480 --> 00:00:46,721
- I'll trade two.
20
00:00:46,722 --> 00:00:48,102
- Two please, Cap.
21
00:00:48,103 --> 00:00:50,000
- So, we all jazzed
for "Welles-ness Week"
22
00:00:50,001 --> 00:00:51,416
with Bethany Welles?
23
00:00:51,417 --> 00:00:53,418
I had to Zoom with her
two weeks ago.
24
00:00:53,419 --> 00:00:55,282
Bethany asked me,
the head of housekeeping,
25
00:00:55,283 --> 00:00:56,938
to personally wash
all the linens
26
00:00:56,939 --> 00:00:58,285
in her own special detergent
27
00:00:58,286 --> 00:01:00,459
made from
pickled cucumber brine.
28
00:01:00,460 --> 00:01:02,944
- Aren't pickled cucumbers
just pickles?
29
00:01:02,945 --> 00:01:04,567
- This woman
is a wellness celebrity.
30
00:01:04,568 --> 00:01:06,431
She has no idea
about what we do,
31
00:01:06,432 --> 00:01:09,641
and yet, for a week, we give her
the keys to the kingdom.
32
00:01:09,642 --> 00:01:11,884
It's like putting a toddler
behind a Mack truck
33
00:01:11,885 --> 00:01:13,748
and saying, "Happy trails."
34
00:01:13,749 --> 00:01:16,717
- Why on Earth would we give
this woman that much power?
35
00:01:16,718 --> 00:01:19,306
- Oh, naive little Dr. Odyssey.
36
00:01:19,307 --> 00:01:22,550
There are exactly
10.2 million reasons why.
37
00:01:22,551 --> 00:01:24,276
- Instagram followers.
38
00:01:24,277 --> 00:01:27,452
- Her company sponsors
this Wellness Week.
39
00:01:27,453 --> 00:01:30,765
And it's a very public,
very big deal,
40
00:01:30,766 --> 00:01:33,251
so we kind of have
a little balancing act here.
41
00:01:33,252 --> 00:01:38,118
We do our jobs
while simultaneously tolerating
42
00:01:38,119 --> 00:01:40,741
Bethany's wackadoodle quirks.
43
00:01:40,742 --> 00:01:43,399
- Last year, she tried to
get me to use corn ethanol
44
00:01:43,400 --> 00:01:44,745
to power the ship.
45
00:01:44,746 --> 00:01:46,160
Corn.
46
00:01:46,161 --> 00:01:48,921
I tell you, this whole, uh,
"global warming" crap
47
00:01:48,922 --> 00:01:50,854
is just so overblown.
48
00:01:50,855 --> 00:01:53,340
- Global warming is overblown?
49
00:01:53,341 --> 00:01:54,927
Just this week,
we'll re-routing around
50
00:01:54,928 --> 00:01:57,240
a major tropical depression
off the coast of Baja.
51
00:01:57,241 --> 00:01:58,793
Tell me, when have we ever
had tropical depressions
52
00:01:58,794 --> 00:02:00,174
in this time of year?
- Well, if the Earth's
53
00:02:00,175 --> 00:02:02,211
getting so hot,
then you just explain to me
54
00:02:02,212 --> 00:02:04,178
why there was 8 feet
of flipping snow last Christmas
55
00:02:04,179 --> 00:02:06,974
in my hometown
of Dowagiac, Michigan.
56
00:02:06,975 --> 00:02:10,253
- Rosie, I'm gonna tell you,
you're the best damn engineer
57
00:02:10,254 --> 00:02:12,255
that a captain
could ever ask for
58
00:02:12,256 --> 00:02:16,156
and nobody knows
this Odyssey better than you,
59
00:02:16,157 --> 00:02:18,848
but on this point,
you're dead wrong.
60
00:02:18,849 --> 00:02:21,126
I've been on the seas
for the better part of my life
61
00:02:21,127 --> 00:02:24,578
and sailed every ocean
in every condition.
62
00:02:24,579 --> 00:02:26,580
And I can tell ya,
63
00:02:26,581 --> 00:02:29,790
from my experience,
this isn't right.
64
00:02:29,791 --> 00:02:31,688
These storms are stronger
65
00:02:31,689 --> 00:02:35,452
and the hurricane seasons last
months longer than they used to.
66
00:02:36,660 --> 00:02:38,419
But speaking of disasters,
67
00:02:38,420 --> 00:02:41,181
it's time for the rest of you
fools to lose your clothing.
68
00:02:41,182 --> 00:02:42,872
- Ah.
- Good.
69
00:02:42,873 --> 00:02:45,046
- Who's still in?
- I'm out like Ellen.
70
00:02:45,047 --> 00:02:48,015
- [ Laughs ]
- Ooh.
71
00:02:48,016 --> 00:02:49,292
- All: Ohh!
72
00:02:49,293 --> 00:02:53,262
- Rosie, you can smell that thing
in Buenaventura.
73
00:02:53,263 --> 00:02:57,336
- Uh, yeah. I'm out, Cap.
You got me, too.
74
00:02:58,337 --> 00:03:00,407
- Fold, but...
75
00:03:00,408 --> 00:03:02,823
Well, joke's on you.
76
00:03:02,824 --> 00:03:04,100
I'm an exhibitionist.
77
00:03:04,101 --> 00:03:06,378
- Ha ha ah! There he is!
78
00:03:06,379 --> 00:03:08,518
- Well, look, first
I want to just say
79
00:03:08,519 --> 00:03:09,795
thank you for inviting me
80
00:03:09,796 --> 00:03:11,487
to the Boys and Butches
card game.
81
00:03:11,488 --> 00:03:12,660
- And "Bi's."
82
00:03:12,661 --> 00:03:14,352
- Sorry.
Boys, Butches, and Bi's.
83
00:03:14,353 --> 00:03:17,769
And in that spirit of inclusion,
I would like to say...
84
00:03:17,770 --> 00:03:19,426
I'm in.
85
00:03:19,427 --> 00:03:20,599
- Really?
86
00:03:20,600 --> 00:03:22,568
- Really.
- Okay.
87
00:03:23,983 --> 00:03:24,983
Three cowboys.
88
00:03:24,984 --> 00:03:26,053
- [ Gasps ]
- [ Whistles ]
89
00:03:26,054 --> 00:03:28,400
- [ Inhales sharply ]
- Ooh!
90
00:03:28,401 --> 00:03:30,989
- "How rude" is the catchphrase
91
00:03:30,990 --> 00:03:33,474
of Stephanie Tanner
on my favorite sitcom...
92
00:03:33,475 --> 00:03:36,132
- Oh, no.
- Oh! Come on.
93
00:03:36,133 --> 00:03:37,754
Come on!
- ..."Full House."
94
00:03:37,755 --> 00:03:40,585
[ Laughter ]
95
00:03:40,586 --> 00:03:42,277
- Okay. [ Sighs ]
96
00:03:43,692 --> 00:03:45,831
- Oh.
- [ Laughter ]
97
00:03:45,832 --> 00:03:48,731
- Hey!
- Okay. There we go!
98
00:03:48,732 --> 00:03:50,215
- Why not the...
99
00:03:50,216 --> 00:03:52,079
- The hat always stays on.
100
00:03:52,080 --> 00:03:53,977
[ Laughter ]
101
00:03:53,978 --> 00:03:56,083
Well, that's game for me.
102
00:03:56,084 --> 00:03:57,912
Remember--
this week, chins up.
103
00:03:57,913 --> 00:04:00,225
We can navigate
around any rough waters,
104
00:04:00,226 --> 00:04:04,125
and we can navigate around the
peculiarities of Bethany Welles.
105
00:04:04,126 --> 00:04:05,989
So no tropical depressions,
106
00:04:05,990 --> 00:04:10,200
either atmospheric or emotional,
are gonna darken our days.
107
00:04:10,201 --> 00:04:12,755
I forecast smiles
108
00:04:12,756 --> 00:04:16,552
and smooth sailing
and sunny skies!
109
00:04:16,553 --> 00:04:18,139
Good night, y'all.
110
00:04:18,140 --> 00:04:19,935
- Night, Cap.
- Night, Cap.
111
00:04:21,212 --> 00:04:22,697
[ Laughter ]
112
00:04:25,700 --> 00:04:27,873
[ Thunder rumbling ]
113
00:04:27,874 --> 00:04:30,566
- [ Creaking ]
- [ Alarms blaring ]
114
00:04:30,567 --> 00:04:32,499
- Are we still on course?
115
00:04:32,500 --> 00:04:34,535
- Barely maintaining.
116
00:04:34,536 --> 00:04:38,263
- Alright, team.
We're entering the first trough.
117
00:04:38,264 --> 00:04:40,507
♪
118
00:04:40,508 --> 00:04:43,511
Alright. Brace for impact.
- Brace!
119
00:04:55,385 --> 00:04:59,180
- So I got a letter yesterday,
and, uh...
120
00:04:59,181 --> 00:05:02,218
Well, uh, I got it.
121
00:05:02,219 --> 00:05:04,185
I got the scholarship.
122
00:05:04,186 --> 00:05:06,395
Yeah.
- That's amazing!
123
00:05:06,396 --> 00:05:08,155
- Thank you!
Oh, congratulations!
124
00:05:08,156 --> 00:05:09,984
- Thanks. Thanks.
125
00:05:09,985 --> 00:05:11,641
- You're gonna be a doctor.
126
00:05:11,642 --> 00:05:13,471
You're going to med school.
You're leaving.
127
00:05:13,472 --> 00:05:15,127
- Y-Yeah. Yeah. I guess so.
- Wow.
128
00:05:15,128 --> 00:05:16,646
- Yeah.
- Man, I'm so happy for you.
129
00:05:16,647 --> 00:05:17,992
That's-- That's great.
- Thank you.
130
00:05:17,993 --> 00:05:19,269
- That is great.
- Thank you so much.
131
00:05:19,270 --> 00:05:20,996
- Yeah.
132
00:05:24,034 --> 00:05:25,379
Hey. Should we--
- Do you want to--
133
00:05:25,380 --> 00:05:27,657
- Well, I just wanted to
check in and make sure
134
00:05:27,658 --> 00:05:29,210
if you wanted to talk about
what happened, but...
135
00:05:29,211 --> 00:05:31,074
- Uh, I mean, I don't have
to talk about what happened.
136
00:05:31,075 --> 00:05:32,593
Do you want to talk
about what happened?
- Oh. No, no.
137
00:05:32,594 --> 00:05:34,043
Then I-- No, no, no. I'm good.
If you're good, I'm good.
138
00:05:34,044 --> 00:05:35,147
- We're great.
- Okay. We're good.
139
00:05:35,148 --> 00:05:37,460
- Yeah. That's good.
- Yeah. Good.
140
00:05:37,461 --> 00:05:40,152
[ Elevator bell dings ]
141
00:05:40,153 --> 00:05:43,086
Well, congratulations.
I-I'm really happy for you.
142
00:05:43,087 --> 00:05:44,847
[ Elevator bell dings ]
143
00:05:44,848 --> 00:06:01,104
♪
144
00:06:01,105 --> 00:06:03,590
- [ Gasps ]
Oh, my God. Oh, my God!
145
00:06:03,591 --> 00:06:05,039
That's Agnes Simkin!
146
00:06:05,040 --> 00:06:06,696
She's an acupuncturist
and a psychic.
147
00:06:06,697 --> 00:06:08,180
She's helped
thousands of people
148
00:06:08,181 --> 00:06:09,423
diagnose chronic conditions.
149
00:06:09,424 --> 00:06:11,770
- Unbelievable. Why rely
on the scientific method
150
00:06:11,771 --> 00:06:13,945
when you can just read
your patient's palm?
151
00:06:13,946 --> 00:06:15,429
- You both really think
152
00:06:15,430 --> 00:06:17,155
Western medicine
has everything figured out?
153
00:06:17,156 --> 00:06:18,708
- Well, all I know
is that when I get sick,
154
00:06:18,709 --> 00:06:21,884
I go to a doctor for some pills,
not a witch for some toadstools.
155
00:06:21,885 --> 00:06:23,437
- [ Laughs ]
156
00:06:23,438 --> 00:06:24,956
- Taxus brevifolia.
157
00:06:24,957 --> 00:06:26,958
A.k.a. the Pacific yew tree.
158
00:06:26,959 --> 00:06:29,512
Its bark contains paclitaxel,
better known as Taxol,
159
00:06:29,513 --> 00:06:30,962
the life-saving
chemotherapy drug.
160
00:06:30,963 --> 00:06:32,722
Practitioners were called crazy
when they first started
161
00:06:32,723 --> 00:06:35,484
using it as a cancer treatment.
- Yeah, but maybe for this week,
162
00:06:35,485 --> 00:06:38,107
we don't use that word--
"crazy."
163
00:06:38,108 --> 00:06:56,401
♪
164
00:06:56,402 --> 00:06:59,128
- Mi Capitàn! Buenos dias!
165
00:06:59,129 --> 00:07:00,819
Muy bueno to be back!
166
00:07:00,820 --> 00:07:02,959
- [ Laughs ]
Bienvenida, Bethany.
167
00:07:02,960 --> 00:07:04,236
Todo es bien.
168
00:07:04,237 --> 00:07:06,238
- [ Chuckles ]
Look at those sapphire eyes.
169
00:07:06,239 --> 00:07:09,172
Oh! You're just so handsome!
I came bearing gifts.
170
00:07:09,173 --> 00:07:10,967
- That's so nice.
- And you get a prize.
171
00:07:10,968 --> 00:07:13,142
- Thank you.
- And you get a prize.
172
00:07:13,143 --> 00:07:14,315
And you get a prize.
- Thank you.
173
00:07:14,316 --> 00:07:15,593
- Captain!
- And, Captain...
174
00:07:15,594 --> 00:07:18,320
- Uh-- Oh. I'm sorry.
Excuse me one second.
175
00:07:19,667 --> 00:07:22,634
- [ Gasps ]
Do you know what this is?!
176
00:07:22,635 --> 00:07:25,016
[ Gasps ] Ozone therapy.
177
00:07:25,017 --> 00:07:27,087
- Where does that tube go?
178
00:07:27,088 --> 00:07:28,951
- It's a rectal application.
179
00:07:28,952 --> 00:07:31,367
Wellness culture.
It's my agony. It's my ecstasy.
180
00:07:31,368 --> 00:07:32,644
Sue me.
181
00:07:32,645 --> 00:07:35,785
- Avery!
Oh, my radiant daughter!
182
00:07:35,786 --> 00:07:37,684
Look at you!
- [ Chuckles ]
183
00:07:37,685 --> 00:07:40,065
- You know, it's time to cut
that thing out of your life.
184
00:07:40,066 --> 00:07:41,791
And I know you know
what I'm talking about.
185
00:07:41,792 --> 00:07:43,448
- Yes, yes.
186
00:07:43,449 --> 00:07:47,107
- We'll talk later about it.
You must be the doctor!
187
00:07:47,108 --> 00:07:49,350
Oh. Oh. Your aura.
188
00:07:49,351 --> 00:07:52,422
It's a crimson, bloody shadow!
189
00:07:52,423 --> 00:07:53,769
- Hi. Hi.
- Huh?
190
00:07:53,770 --> 00:07:55,253
- Sorry.
- Ohh.
191
00:07:55,254 --> 00:07:57,842
- Hi. I'm Kathy. I came all
they way from Cedar Rapids.
192
00:07:57,843 --> 00:08:00,741
I can't believe
it's really you! I'm crying!
193
00:08:00,742 --> 00:08:03,019
- [ Laughs ] Oh, bless you.
194
00:08:03,020 --> 00:08:07,576
May our tears, as carriers
of truth, flow ceaselessly.
195
00:08:07,577 --> 00:08:10,544
- Can I get a selfie?
- You better post it. Right?
196
00:08:10,545 --> 00:08:11,959
[ Laughs ] Okay.
197
00:08:11,960 --> 00:08:14,444
Rowan! Rapido!
198
00:08:14,445 --> 00:08:15,722
[ Camera shutter clicks ]
199
00:08:15,723 --> 00:08:17,068
- Tag B. Welles Health and Beauty
200
00:08:17,069 --> 00:08:18,966
for 10% off
at our onboard store.
201
00:08:18,967 --> 00:08:20,520
[ Elevator bell dings ]
202
00:08:20,521 --> 00:08:45,234
♪
203
00:08:45,235 --> 00:08:49,445
- Ah! The ship has called to me
like a great spirit beckoning.
204
00:08:49,446 --> 00:08:52,482
- May she nestle you securely
in her mighty bosom.
205
00:08:52,483 --> 00:08:53,794
- Oh. Ohh!
206
00:08:53,795 --> 00:08:55,589
Everyone, I'd like you to meet
207
00:08:55,590 --> 00:08:57,971
my dear, dear friend,
Vivian Montgomery,
208
00:08:57,972 --> 00:09:01,008
whom you may recognize
if you own a television.
209
00:09:01,009 --> 00:09:03,286
That's right.
Viv is a two-time winner
210
00:09:03,287 --> 00:09:05,185
of "Red-Hot Chef,"
211
00:09:05,186 --> 00:09:08,119
and she will be overseeing
our cuisine this week.
212
00:09:08,120 --> 00:09:10,949
Oh, her liver carpaccio
is to die for!
213
00:09:10,950 --> 00:09:14,228
- Personal chef to a bunch
of smoothie drinkers.
214
00:09:14,229 --> 00:09:15,782
Sweet gig.
215
00:09:15,783 --> 00:09:18,579
- Coming from a candy striper
on a cruise ship?
216
00:09:19,269 --> 00:09:22,098
- [ Clears throat ]
- Um, Bethany, what's all this?
217
00:09:22,099 --> 00:09:24,618
- Oh, did I forget to tell you?
Oops.
218
00:09:24,619 --> 00:09:27,379
Might I wrangle the doctor
for just a squeak?
219
00:09:27,380 --> 00:09:30,210
I just have some
tiny micro details to go over
220
00:09:30,211 --> 00:09:32,730
just for pesky
insurance purposes.
221
00:09:32,731 --> 00:09:35,940
- Wrangle away.
- You're the best. [ Chuckles ]
222
00:09:35,941 --> 00:09:38,114
My lawyers,
the nervous ninnies,
223
00:09:38,115 --> 00:09:40,841
demanded a doctor sign off
on some of my cuisine choices.
224
00:09:40,842 --> 00:09:43,085
You know, liability,
yada yada yada.
225
00:09:43,086 --> 00:09:44,673
You know, I've been
on this incredible diet
226
00:09:44,674 --> 00:09:46,744
for the past six months
and I've never felt better.
227
00:09:46,745 --> 00:09:49,229
Viv, tell him all about it!
228
00:09:49,230 --> 00:09:52,025
- It's organ meats,
nature's multivitamin.
229
00:09:52,026 --> 00:09:55,338
They're rich in iron, copper,
vitamins A, B.
230
00:09:55,339 --> 00:09:57,927
Low in cholesterol
and full of protein.
231
00:09:57,928 --> 00:09:59,411
Here. Try it.
232
00:09:59,412 --> 00:10:00,965
This is goat liver.
233
00:10:00,966 --> 00:10:03,623
The flavor is smooth, delicate,
and it's easily digestible.
234
00:10:03,624 --> 00:10:05,452
- Are you asking me
to eat that?
235
00:10:05,453 --> 00:10:08,213
- Obviously.
- No. [ Chuckles ]
236
00:10:08,214 --> 00:10:11,285
Raw meat is filled with
bacteria, pathogens, parasites.
237
00:10:11,286 --> 00:10:13,529
Why don't we cook it first?
- No You'll ruin it
238
00:10:13,530 --> 00:10:15,531
That's the food
of our ancestors.
239
00:10:15,532 --> 00:10:18,396
You know, they didn't have
expensive flambé pans
240
00:10:18,397 --> 00:10:21,123
or fancy polyurethane
sous vide bags.
241
00:10:21,124 --> 00:10:22,676
No, they took a raw bite,
242
00:10:22,677 --> 00:10:24,126
they chewed, they swallowed,
and they thrived.
243
00:10:24,127 --> 00:10:25,852
- And they lived
to the ripe old age of 22.
244
00:10:25,853 --> 00:10:28,958
- You eat sushi, right?
What's the difference?
245
00:10:28,959 --> 00:10:32,306
Come on, Doc.
What are you afraid of?
246
00:10:32,307 --> 00:10:33,791
- I'll eat it.
247
00:10:33,792 --> 00:10:35,309
- Tristan.
So nice of you to join us.
248
00:10:35,310 --> 00:10:38,347
- Sh-- Happy to help.
[ Chuckles ]
249
00:10:38,348 --> 00:10:41,039
Wow. That looks...
250
00:10:41,040 --> 00:10:42,835
looks lovely.
251
00:10:43,733 --> 00:10:45,009
- Thank you.
- Mmm.
252
00:10:45,010 --> 00:10:46,907
- See? Nothing to be afraid of.
253
00:10:46,908 --> 00:10:49,323
I'm having Vivian
include a special course
254
00:10:49,324 --> 00:10:51,429
with tonight's dinner--
with your go-ahead, Doctor.
255
00:10:51,430 --> 00:10:54,295
- I don't see the harm.
What say you, Doc?
256
00:10:55,572 --> 00:10:57,849
- Sure, but I want
a member of my team
257
00:10:57,850 --> 00:10:59,540
to oversee
the food-prep process.
258
00:10:59,541 --> 00:11:01,473
I don't want there to be
any cross-contamination.
259
00:11:01,474 --> 00:11:03,268
Tristan, you seem to
have taken a keen interest.
260
00:11:03,269 --> 00:11:06,202
- Oh, yeah. Whatever you say.
261
00:11:06,203 --> 00:11:08,342
- You hear that?
262
00:11:08,343 --> 00:11:10,104
You're mine.
263
00:11:12,244 --> 00:11:13,727
- Dearie me.
264
00:11:13,728 --> 00:11:18,421
♪
265
00:11:18,422 --> 00:11:19,629
- How y'all doing?
266
00:11:19,630 --> 00:11:21,942
I'm Judy Riva
the Smoothie Diva,
267
00:11:21,943 --> 00:11:24,945
and I'm joined today
by healer extraordinaire
268
00:11:24,946 --> 00:11:26,222
Agnes Simkin!
269
00:11:26,223 --> 00:11:27,845
[ All cheering ]
270
00:11:27,846 --> 00:11:30,813
Now, organic ingredients
mixed properly--
271
00:11:30,814 --> 00:11:32,642
this is nature's medicine.
- Hm.
272
00:11:32,643 --> 00:11:36,060
- So I put all the good stuff
in one powder-- DivaDust.
273
00:11:36,061 --> 00:11:37,993
Now, this is
my proprietary blend
274
00:11:37,994 --> 00:11:42,135
of superfoods, minerals,
and pre- and probiotics.
275
00:11:42,136 --> 00:11:44,102
- Hm. What's in it?
She won't tell me.
276
00:11:44,103 --> 00:11:45,103
She never has.
277
00:11:45,104 --> 00:11:46,173
[ Laughter ]
278
00:11:46,174 --> 00:11:47,934
- Well, I can't tell you.
279
00:11:47,935 --> 00:11:49,487
If I tell you that, my lawyers
280
00:11:49,488 --> 00:11:51,144
will have you
walk the gangplank.
281
00:11:51,145 --> 00:11:53,387
- I have a crazy legal team,
as well. Hm.
282
00:11:53,388 --> 00:11:56,425
- What I can tell you
is that this mixture
283
00:11:56,426 --> 00:11:59,083
literally erased
my son's dyslexia.
284
00:11:59,084 --> 00:12:02,880
And for me, it cured a terrible
case of chronic hiccups.
285
00:12:02,881 --> 00:12:05,399
- [ Chuckles ]
Uh, you know, three years ago,
286
00:12:05,400 --> 00:12:07,367
Judy came to me
and she said, "Eat my dust,"
287
00:12:07,368 --> 00:12:09,334
in that very brash tone of hers.
288
00:12:09,335 --> 00:12:11,751
Um, but I have to say,
I'm so glad that I did, really.
289
00:12:11,752 --> 00:12:14,374
Because I start every morning
with a DivaDust smoothie.
290
00:12:14,375 --> 00:12:16,376
And I know it's hard
to tell in this tunic,
291
00:12:16,377 --> 00:12:17,860
but I'm quite thin.
292
00:12:17,861 --> 00:12:20,069
So the proof is in the pudding,
as they say.
293
00:12:20,070 --> 00:12:22,486
- Yes. The proof is in the dust.
294
00:12:23,625 --> 00:12:25,385
I have, along with DivaDust,
295
00:12:25,386 --> 00:12:27,352
a couple of
incredible ingredients
296
00:12:27,353 --> 00:12:29,803
which are not even legal
in the U.S.
297
00:12:29,804 --> 00:12:32,806
- Ooh.
- Um, including bitter almonds.
298
00:12:32,807 --> 00:12:34,670
These guys have
twice the nutrients
299
00:12:34,671 --> 00:12:36,534
and way more flavor
300
00:12:36,535 --> 00:12:39,675
than the regular old ones
at the supermarket.
301
00:12:39,676 --> 00:12:41,884
[ Whirring ]
302
00:12:41,885 --> 00:12:47,373
♪
303
00:12:49,237 --> 00:12:51,031
- Excuse me.
Can we get a picture with you?
304
00:12:51,032 --> 00:12:53,033
- Oh. Of course, my loves.
305
00:12:53,034 --> 00:12:54,828
[ Camera shutter clicks ]
306
00:12:54,829 --> 00:12:57,935
- Uh, Miss Simkin?
Hi. Um, I'm Avery.
307
00:12:57,936 --> 00:12:59,660
I'm a nurse here on the Odyssey,
308
00:12:59,661 --> 00:13:03,423
and I just wanted to say
I'm a huge fan.
309
00:13:03,424 --> 00:13:06,253
- It's a shame to see such
a young and promising woman
310
00:13:06,254 --> 00:13:08,118
working for the enemy.
311
00:13:08,878 --> 00:13:10,568
Hm. Big Pharma?
312
00:13:10,569 --> 00:13:12,432
[ Scoffs ]
The sickness industrial complex?
313
00:13:12,433 --> 00:13:14,675
Doctors and nurses,
like yourself,
314
00:13:14,676 --> 00:13:17,195
have a vested interest
in keeping people sick.
315
00:13:17,196 --> 00:13:19,853
True wellness comes from within,
not without.
316
00:13:19,854 --> 00:13:23,961
- Um, I-I don't-- I don't think
that's fair at all, actually.
317
00:13:23,962 --> 00:13:28,206
I-I swore an oath to help people
318
00:13:28,207 --> 00:13:30,588
that I take very seriously.
319
00:13:30,589 --> 00:13:32,176
A-Are you--
320
00:13:32,177 --> 00:13:34,488
Uh, are you okay?
321
00:13:34,489 --> 00:13:35,904
- Huh.
322
00:13:35,905 --> 00:13:37,802
I'm fine, sweetie.
I'm an empath.
323
00:13:37,803 --> 00:13:40,632
I probably picked up
on a rogue emotion of yours.
324
00:13:40,633 --> 00:13:41,910
Perhaps guilt.
325
00:13:41,911 --> 00:13:43,394
[ Breathing sharply ]
326
00:13:43,395 --> 00:13:44,636
[ Groans ]
327
00:13:44,637 --> 00:13:46,673
- Miss Simkin?
- [ Groans ]
328
00:13:46,674 --> 00:13:50,608
- 1027 on the pool deck.
We need a stretcher, stat!
329
00:13:50,609 --> 00:13:52,714
What the hell
was in that smoothie?
330
00:13:56,926 --> 00:13:58,512
- Let's get her cuffed up.
331
00:13:58,513 --> 00:13:59,789
- No-- No tech.
I'm tech-adverse.
332
00:13:59,790 --> 00:14:00,998
No. Get it off.
333
00:14:00,999 --> 00:14:02,759
[ Groaning ]
334
00:14:04,071 --> 00:14:05,830
- Prep 5 grams of
hydroxocobalamin.
335
00:14:05,831 --> 00:14:07,314
- Poisoned by bitter almonds?
336
00:14:07,315 --> 00:14:08,902
T-That's impossible!
They're organic.
337
00:14:08,903 --> 00:14:10,593
- Yeah. So is arsenic.
338
00:14:10,594 --> 00:14:11,905
Bitter almonds
contain amygdalin,
339
00:14:11,906 --> 00:14:13,493
which breaks down
into hydrogen cyanide
340
00:14:13,494 --> 00:14:14,666
when ingested in high doses.
341
00:14:14,667 --> 00:14:16,772
- Be ready to initiate
ACLS procedures.
342
00:14:16,773 --> 00:14:19,050
- If I'm gonna be subjected
to this Western medical torture,
343
00:14:19,051 --> 00:14:20,362
I at least need
to be able to breathe!
344
00:14:20,363 --> 00:14:21,881
- I'm gonna get you
some oxygen right now.
345
00:14:21,882 --> 00:14:25,264
- No, no, sweetie, no.
Allow my-- my body to breathe.
346
00:14:27,611 --> 00:14:29,198
[ Groans ]
347
00:14:29,199 --> 00:14:30,545
- Doctor...
348
00:14:31,926 --> 00:14:33,616
- Spider angiomas.
349
00:14:33,617 --> 00:14:34,895
- [ Groans ]
350
00:14:36,586 --> 00:14:38,449
[ Groans loudly ]
351
00:14:38,450 --> 00:14:40,002
- Avery, this isn't
cyanide poisoning.
352
00:14:40,003 --> 00:14:41,176
It's not the almonds.
353
00:14:41,177 --> 00:14:43,454
- Well, I hate to say
I told you so.
354
00:14:43,455 --> 00:14:45,042
- What else
is in those smoothies?
355
00:14:45,043 --> 00:14:47,803
- I can't tell you that.
That's-- That's proprietary.
356
00:14:47,804 --> 00:14:50,944
I mean, that's like telling you
the recipe for Coca-Cola.
357
00:14:50,945 --> 00:14:52,290
- [ Monitor beeping ]
- She's seizing!
358
00:14:52,291 --> 00:14:55,259
Let's get her oxygen now!
359
00:14:55,260 --> 00:14:56,985
- It's just a thickener!
360
00:14:56,986 --> 00:14:59,677
Ashwagandha root.
B complex vitamins.
361
00:14:59,678 --> 00:15:02,439
A Tara powder base.
- Tara powder?
362
00:15:03,993 --> 00:15:06,201
Prep for emergency dialysis now.
363
00:15:06,202 --> 00:15:17,453
♪
364
00:15:17,454 --> 00:15:20,560
Prep the machine. We're aiming
for a bicarbonate dialysate.
365
00:15:20,561 --> 00:15:22,907
Start at a flow rate
of 300 milliliters a minute.
366
00:15:22,908 --> 00:15:23,977
- Got it.
367
00:15:23,978 --> 00:15:26,429
- Monitoring for
disequilibrium syndrome.
368
00:15:27,913 --> 00:15:29,983
Tara powder.
How did you know what that was?
369
00:15:29,984 --> 00:15:32,020
- When I was working for
Doctors Without Borders in Peru,
370
00:15:32,021 --> 00:15:33,745
we would get cases of kids
who were accidentally eating
371
00:15:33,746 --> 00:15:35,264
the seed pods
from the tara tree,
372
00:15:35,265 --> 00:15:37,887
which is toxic to the liver,
and they also bind to proteins,
373
00:15:37,888 --> 00:15:39,751
making it impossible
for the body to absorb them.
374
00:15:39,752 --> 00:15:42,064
She'll be fine in a few days.
- Explains why people who drink
375
00:15:42,065 --> 00:15:43,963
the smoothies feel full
but still lose weight.
376
00:15:43,964 --> 00:15:46,311
They're developing
malnutrition. Nice.
377
00:15:47,933 --> 00:15:49,796
- Hey, gents.
- Captain.
378
00:15:49,797 --> 00:15:51,177
- Say what you will about her,
379
00:15:51,178 --> 00:15:53,524
Bethany Welles puts together
a hell of a gift bag.
380
00:15:53,525 --> 00:15:55,008
Care for a saltwater taffy
381
00:15:55,009 --> 00:15:57,217
made with Indian Ocean
saltwater?
382
00:15:57,218 --> 00:15:59,357
- Munroe,
when I was 18 years old,
383
00:15:59,358 --> 00:16:02,395
I worked a clam trawler
out of Atlantic City,
384
00:16:02,396 --> 00:16:05,156
and ever since then,
that taffy tastes like
385
00:16:05,157 --> 00:16:06,882
broken heart
and permanent sunburn.
386
00:16:06,883 --> 00:16:08,401
[ Laughter ]
387
00:16:08,402 --> 00:16:10,403
Tell me about
this tropical depression.
388
00:16:10,404 --> 00:16:11,852
- She's taking the usual route
up the coast--
389
00:16:11,853 --> 00:16:13,509
northwest to west-northwest.
390
00:16:13,510 --> 00:16:15,891
If we stay the course,
we should only encounter
the outer bands.
391
00:16:15,892 --> 00:16:17,789
Shouldn't get much choppier
than this.
392
00:16:17,790 --> 00:16:19,964
- Alright. Good.
I'm still gonna want
393
00:16:19,965 --> 00:16:22,311
some up-to-minute reports from
the National Hurricane Center.
394
00:16:22,312 --> 00:16:23,933
Give me some
bridge-to-bridge comms
395
00:16:23,934 --> 00:16:27,282
and forecasting models
from OWS and GFS.
396
00:16:27,283 --> 00:16:29,870
Anything changes, we'll just
turn this puppy around
397
00:16:29,871 --> 00:16:31,941
and make port in Baja.
398
00:16:31,942 --> 00:16:35,083
Meanwhile, let's smooth
this damn ride out.
399
00:16:35,084 --> 00:16:36,912
- Sir.
400
00:16:36,913 --> 00:16:39,432
Bridge to Control Room.
Activate stabilizers.
401
00:16:39,433 --> 00:16:42,607
- Control Room copies.
Activating stabilization system.
402
00:16:42,608 --> 00:16:48,717
♪
403
00:16:48,718 --> 00:16:52,065
- Folks, this is your captain
coming to you from the bridge.
404
00:16:52,066 --> 00:16:55,551
Now, out on the ocean,
as in life, it's not a question
405
00:16:55,552 --> 00:16:57,657
of when you're gonna
encounter waves.
406
00:16:57,658 --> 00:17:00,660
It's, what do you do
when they come up?
407
00:17:00,661 --> 00:17:02,627
And here on the Odyssey,
408
00:17:02,628 --> 00:17:05,768
when the waves
come a-rockin'...
409
00:17:05,769 --> 00:17:09,772
we start rockin' and rollin'.
410
00:17:09,773 --> 00:17:11,429
Boom.
411
00:17:11,430 --> 00:17:18,091
♪
412
00:17:18,092 --> 00:17:19,679
- Not so much.
- Yes, Chef.
413
00:17:19,680 --> 00:17:21,129
- Hmm.
414
00:17:21,130 --> 00:17:24,960
♪
415
00:17:24,961 --> 00:17:27,100
- You call that a julienne?
416
00:17:27,101 --> 00:17:28,205
- ♪ Riders on the storm
417
00:17:28,206 --> 00:17:29,551
- I call that a carrot.
418
00:17:29,552 --> 00:17:31,932
♪
419
00:17:31,933 --> 00:17:34,245
- ♪ Riders on the storm
420
00:17:34,246 --> 00:17:37,697
- Well...
you're hopeless.
421
00:17:37,698 --> 00:17:39,769
- I really am.
422
00:17:40,942 --> 00:17:43,807
- ♪ Into this world,
we're thrown ♪
423
00:17:45,395 --> 00:17:47,810
♪ Like a dog
without a bone ♪
424
00:17:47,811 --> 00:17:50,882
♪ An actor out on loan
- Back to work!
425
00:17:50,883 --> 00:17:53,609
- ♪ Riders on the storm
426
00:17:53,610 --> 00:17:55,301
- Yes, Chef.
427
00:17:55,302 --> 00:17:56,750
[ Soft jazz music plays ]
428
00:17:56,751 --> 00:17:58,373
[ Indistinct conversations ]
429
00:17:58,374 --> 00:18:09,004
♪
430
00:18:09,005 --> 00:18:10,454
- Hey, Bethany.
Is everything okay?
431
00:18:10,455 --> 00:18:12,214
- Absolutely not!
432
00:18:12,215 --> 00:18:14,458
My beef hearts
taste like organ meat!
433
00:18:14,459 --> 00:18:16,943
Something is off.
434
00:18:16,944 --> 00:18:19,739
- I'm so sorry to hear that.
The meat is fresh.
435
00:18:19,740 --> 00:18:22,086
It's emulsified with capers,
shallots, anchovy paste.
436
00:18:22,087 --> 00:18:23,363
It's the same as always.
437
00:18:23,364 --> 00:18:25,365
- Listing the ingredients
doesn't help, Viv!
438
00:18:25,366 --> 00:18:26,849
Clearly we made a mistake!
439
00:18:26,850 --> 00:18:28,472
You know,
you're a talented cook,
440
00:18:28,473 --> 00:18:31,958
but it takes a real brilliant
chef to work at this scale.
441
00:18:31,959 --> 00:18:34,236
Alright? Just get rid of it.
Take it away.
442
00:18:34,237 --> 00:18:36,238
And do that thing I like
with the Spam and the mozzarella
443
00:18:36,239 --> 00:18:37,998
and mix it up
so it looks like tartare.
444
00:18:37,999 --> 00:18:41,381
Okay? Can you do that?!
That's cooking 101! [Scoffs]
445
00:18:41,382 --> 00:18:43,038
- Of course.
- Thank you.
446
00:18:43,039 --> 00:18:52,565
♪
447
00:18:52,566 --> 00:18:53,876
- What?
448
00:18:53,877 --> 00:18:54,981
We're friends.
449
00:18:54,982 --> 00:18:57,397
- [Scoffs] You're "friends"?
450
00:18:57,398 --> 00:18:59,848
I thought you were
trying to not do this.
451
00:18:59,849 --> 00:19:01,229
- Do what?
- I support
452
00:19:01,230 --> 00:19:02,954
whatever you're doing
or not doing.
453
00:19:02,955 --> 00:19:05,957
She's talented, successful.
Maybe this thing has legs.
454
00:19:05,958 --> 00:19:08,477
- [Scoffs]
It's got legs. Long ones.
455
00:19:08,478 --> 00:19:10,755
Her food is awful.
I can't eat this.
456
00:19:10,756 --> 00:19:12,895
- For whatever it's worth,
my liver mousse is really tasty.
457
00:19:12,896 --> 00:19:14,380
- Yeah, well,
it's making me nauseous.
458
00:19:14,381 --> 00:19:16,796
- Then go have a Hot Pocket
in your cabin!
459
00:19:16,797 --> 00:19:18,970
- You know what? I think I will.
460
00:19:18,971 --> 00:19:24,217
♪
461
00:19:24,218 --> 00:19:26,840
- No. Nope.
We're not doing this again.
462
00:19:26,841 --> 00:19:28,187
No more drama in the infirmary.
463
00:19:28,188 --> 00:19:30,361
Go quash whatever that is
right now.
464
00:19:30,362 --> 00:19:34,227
♪
465
00:19:34,228 --> 00:19:36,920
[ Thunder rumbles ]
466
00:19:40,441 --> 00:19:43,788
- Looks like we're on the other
side of that storm system.
467
00:19:43,789 --> 00:19:45,238
- Yeah, maybe.
468
00:19:45,239 --> 00:19:46,344
- Hey.
469
00:19:48,035 --> 00:19:49,208
What is your problem?
470
00:19:49,209 --> 00:19:50,726
Are you jealous or something?
471
00:19:50,727 --> 00:19:52,487
- [Scoffs] Of you and--
472
00:19:52,488 --> 00:19:54,247
[Scoffs]
No, babe, I'm not jealous.
473
00:19:54,248 --> 00:19:57,355
- [Scoffs] You rejected me.
474
00:19:58,494 --> 00:20:00,564
And now that I'm moving on
and I've found someone
475
00:20:00,565 --> 00:20:02,981
that I actually like,
it's making you crazy.
476
00:20:03,982 --> 00:20:08,123
[ Scoffs] What?
She's nice and she's smart.
477
00:20:08,124 --> 00:20:09,504
She's an extremely good cook.
478
00:20:09,505 --> 00:20:11,368
- She literally doesn't cook.
That's her whole thing.
479
00:20:11,369 --> 00:20:12,610
She's a talking Cuisinart--
- Hey, guys.
480
00:20:12,611 --> 00:20:14,888
- Ah...
481
00:20:14,889 --> 00:20:17,822
- Ah, imagine coming out
onto the deck...
482
00:20:17,823 --> 00:20:20,722
only to find people
talking about you.
483
00:20:20,723 --> 00:20:22,102
Not cool.
484
00:20:22,103 --> 00:20:24,104
- [ Sighs ]
I'm going to bed. I feel sick.
485
00:20:24,105 --> 00:20:26,348
- Have a bit too much
Zinfandel?
486
00:20:26,349 --> 00:20:27,763
- No, actually. I had a lot
of whatever you made tonight.
487
00:20:27,764 --> 00:20:30,387
- Hey. Cut it out.
Knock it off over there.
488
00:20:30,388 --> 00:20:32,320
We got bigger fish to fry.
489
00:20:32,321 --> 00:20:34,563
We're not on the other side
of this storm.
490
00:20:34,564 --> 00:20:36,185
We're in the eye of it.
491
00:20:36,186 --> 00:20:38,395
Damn thing must have
built up around us.
492
00:20:38,396 --> 00:20:40,845
Brandon, give me your walkie.
493
00:20:40,846 --> 00:20:44,918
♪
494
00:20:44,919 --> 00:20:46,265
[ Radio beeps ]
495
00:20:46,266 --> 00:20:47,680
- Captain Massey to the bridge.
496
00:20:47,681 --> 00:20:50,130
Munroe, what's it look like
on the Doppler?
497
00:20:50,131 --> 00:20:53,168
[ Thunder rumbling ]
498
00:20:53,169 --> 00:20:55,929
First Officer Munroe, come in.
499
00:20:55,930 --> 00:20:57,034
[ Radio static ]
500
00:20:57,035 --> 00:20:59,139
First officer Munroe, come in.
501
00:20:59,140 --> 00:21:01,038
[ Door opens ]
502
00:21:01,039 --> 00:21:13,637
♪
503
00:21:13,638 --> 00:21:15,604
Psilocybin.
504
00:21:15,605 --> 00:21:18,194
Ohh. Beautiful.
505
00:21:19,885 --> 00:21:22,784
- [Weakly] What--
What's going on, Cap?
506
00:21:22,785 --> 00:21:24,924
- Well, Munroe, what's going on
507
00:21:24,925 --> 00:21:28,410
is you're higher than
Snoop D-O Double G...
508
00:21:28,411 --> 00:21:30,170
and we're in the middle
of a hurricane,
509
00:21:30,171 --> 00:21:31,413
maybe one of the worst
510
00:21:31,414 --> 00:21:33,622
I've ever seen
in this part of the Pacific.
511
00:21:33,623 --> 00:21:34,899
- High? [ Giggles ]
512
00:21:34,900 --> 00:21:36,970
- Yeah.
- I'm high? What?
513
00:21:36,971 --> 00:21:39,214
- Yeah. You're alright.
514
00:21:39,215 --> 00:21:40,940
You didn't get into that,
did you?
515
00:21:40,941 --> 00:21:42,286
- No, sir.
516
00:21:42,287 --> 00:21:43,874
- That's one in a row.
517
00:21:43,875 --> 00:21:45,325
- Hmm...
518
00:21:47,568 --> 00:21:48,741
[ Beep ]
519
00:21:48,742 --> 00:21:50,398
- Folks, this is your captain
520
00:21:50,399 --> 00:21:52,848
calling from the bridge deck
with an update.
521
00:21:52,849 --> 00:21:54,643
[ Breathes deeply ]
522
00:21:54,644 --> 00:21:57,163
Well, it appears that
Mother Nature has decided
523
00:21:57,164 --> 00:21:59,476
to come along for the ride
this week.
524
00:21:59,477 --> 00:22:01,374
As calm as it may seem
right now,
525
00:22:01,375 --> 00:22:05,861
we are actually
in the eye of a hurricane.
526
00:22:05,862 --> 00:22:08,933
The worst of the storm could
hit in a few hours or a day.
527
00:22:08,934 --> 00:22:10,728
Remain calm and await
further announcement.
528
00:22:10,729 --> 00:22:13,179
- [ Vomits ]
I told you there was
529
00:22:13,180 --> 00:22:15,182
something wrong with that food!
530
00:22:22,051 --> 00:22:23,810
- [ Knocking ]
- Avery, you in there?
531
00:22:23,811 --> 00:22:25,294
- [ Groans ]
- You okay?
532
00:22:25,295 --> 00:22:27,780
- Ugh.
- I'm not leaving
533
00:22:27,781 --> 00:22:29,609
until I see whatever
ingenious thing
534
00:22:29,610 --> 00:22:32,061
you've fashioned
into a barf bucket.
535
00:22:40,932 --> 00:22:42,796
- It's from the nursery.
536
00:22:44,211 --> 00:22:46,350
It's for sandcastles.
537
00:22:46,351 --> 00:22:47,938
- Not anymore.
538
00:22:47,939 --> 00:22:50,147
Okay. Infirmary.
Come on. Let's go.
539
00:22:50,148 --> 00:22:52,943
- I have food poisoning.
Just let me cocoon in privacy.
540
00:22:52,944 --> 00:22:54,669
- How do you know
it's food poisoning?
541
00:22:54,670 --> 00:22:57,879
- Oh, because I am
a very good nurse, Maxwell.
542
00:22:57,880 --> 00:22:59,984
Abdominal pain, vomiting, and,
543
00:22:59,985 --> 00:23:02,677
oh, yeah, eating
a plateful of raw meat.
544
00:23:02,678 --> 00:23:04,782
- Is it a broad pain
or a sharp, persistent pain?
545
00:23:04,783 --> 00:23:06,922
- You are a sharp,
persistent pain.
546
00:23:06,923 --> 00:23:09,235
- [ Chuckles ]
We don't self-diagnose.
547
00:23:09,236 --> 00:23:11,237
Them's the rules.
Infirmary! Come on!
548
00:23:11,238 --> 00:23:12,928
- No. I can hardly stand.
549
00:23:12,929 --> 00:23:15,897
How do you expect me
to walk to the infirmary?
550
00:23:15,898 --> 00:23:20,591
♪
551
00:23:20,592 --> 00:23:21,661
No.
552
00:23:21,662 --> 00:23:23,491
[ Elevator bell dings ]
553
00:23:23,492 --> 00:23:27,736
- Purify the space!
To create a better place!
554
00:23:27,737 --> 00:23:30,912
Purify the space!
Put it on your face!
555
00:23:30,913 --> 00:23:32,292
[ Smoke detector beeping ]
556
00:23:32,293 --> 00:23:35,434
- I leave for five minut--
Are you burning sage?!
557
00:23:35,435 --> 00:23:37,677
- Create a better place!
Purify the space!
558
00:23:37,678 --> 00:23:40,439
Create a better place!
Purify the space!
559
00:23:40,440 --> 00:23:42,061
- Hey, Tristan.
- Yeah?
560
00:23:42,062 --> 00:23:43,614
- You call that in to the bridge,
make sure they know
561
00:23:43,615 --> 00:23:45,271
there's nothing on fire
down here.
562
00:23:45,272 --> 00:23:46,893
- Way ahead of you.
She showed up and started
563
00:23:46,894 --> 00:23:48,861
babbling about healing rituals.
564
00:23:48,862 --> 00:23:50,483
- Need a hand over here
with Avery.
565
00:23:50,484 --> 00:23:52,658
I need her vitals
and put her on--
- 500-mil saline bag.
566
00:23:52,659 --> 00:23:54,280
4 milligrams ondansetron
for nausea?
567
00:23:54,281 --> 00:23:55,695
- My guy. And for pain?
- Ozone.
568
00:23:55,696 --> 00:23:57,179
- No, I was gonna
say Toradol, but...
569
00:23:57,180 --> 00:23:59,458
- No. She's inhaling the ozone.
570
00:23:59,459 --> 00:24:01,770
- Oh, God! Bethany!
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no!
571
00:24:01,771 --> 00:24:05,256
We do not inhale the ozone.
That's toxic.
572
00:24:05,257 --> 00:24:06,775
Okay. Hi, Bethany. Hi. Hi. Hi.
573
00:24:06,776 --> 00:24:08,467
I'm gonna need
to take your vitals. Okay?
574
00:24:08,468 --> 00:24:10,986
- Mm-hmm.
- Stick with me for one sec.
575
00:24:10,987 --> 00:24:12,643
- I can do this.
- Dr. Odyssey!
576
00:24:12,644 --> 00:24:13,782
- Hey, Tristan.
- Yeah?
577
00:24:13,783 --> 00:24:15,059
- I need a CBC
and a tox screen.
578
00:24:15,060 --> 00:24:16,267
I think she might have
ingested something.
579
00:24:16,268 --> 00:24:17,786
- Yeah, a spoonful
of bath salts maybe?
580
00:24:17,787 --> 00:24:20,064
- Also prep some Ativan.
We're gonna do a grab-and-stab.
581
00:24:20,065 --> 00:24:21,687
- Grab-and-stab.
- Hi, Bethany. Hi. Hi.
582
00:24:21,688 --> 00:24:25,414
How you doing? Deep breaths.
One breath. Two breath.
583
00:24:25,415 --> 00:24:27,313
Three deep--
Three deep breaths.
584
00:24:27,314 --> 00:24:29,627
- Sleep well, B. Welles.
585
00:24:32,008 --> 00:24:34,700
- Let's get her in some straps,
just in case.
586
00:24:34,701 --> 00:24:39,290
♪
587
00:24:39,291 --> 00:24:40,845
- [ Groans ]
588
00:24:42,571 --> 00:24:44,503
- We're back with you.
- [ Moans ]
589
00:24:44,504 --> 00:24:46,850
- Alright. What happens when
you palpate your right side?
590
00:24:46,851 --> 00:24:49,473
- Oww! Rebound pain.
591
00:24:49,474 --> 00:24:51,544
[Exhales sharply]
Okay. It's not food poisoning.
592
00:24:51,545 --> 00:24:53,581
It's either, um-- It's kidney
stones, diverticulitis...
593
00:24:53,582 --> 00:24:56,411
- Or appendicitis.
- Appendicitis?
594
00:24:56,412 --> 00:24:58,206
Do we have time to do tests,
a CT scan?
595
00:24:58,207 --> 00:24:59,345
- No, but we don't need to.
596
00:24:59,346 --> 00:25:00,829
Are you familiar
with RPO procedure?
597
00:25:00,830 --> 00:25:02,106
- Nuh-unh.
- There are three checks.
598
00:25:02,107 --> 00:25:03,625
One, pain in the
lower-right quadrant.
599
00:25:03,626 --> 00:25:04,833
You've already exhibited that.
600
00:25:04,834 --> 00:25:06,939
Two pain when
the right leg is flexed.
601
00:25:06,940 --> 00:25:08,354
- [ Groans loudly ]
Check.
602
00:25:08,355 --> 00:25:10,321
Three, pain when the hip
is put into interior rotation.
603
00:25:10,322 --> 00:25:12,634
- Ow! Check, check, check!
Ding, ding, ding!
604
00:25:12,635 --> 00:25:15,119
Max, I think you're
gonna have to operate.
605
00:25:15,120 --> 00:25:16,569
Ooh! It feels like
it's gonna rupture!
606
00:25:16,570 --> 00:25:18,295
- Yeah, I told you. I told you.
607
00:25:18,296 --> 00:25:19,607
I told you it wasn't
food poisoning.
608
00:25:19,608 --> 00:25:21,609
Why won't you
listen to me, Aves?!
609
00:25:21,610 --> 00:25:23,507
- [ Buzzer alarm sounding ]
- [ Avery groans ]
610
00:25:23,508 --> 00:25:26,786
- All guests,
please return to your cabins.
611
00:25:26,787 --> 00:25:29,996
All guests,
please return to your cabins.
612
00:25:29,997 --> 00:25:31,584
[ Thunder crashing ]
613
00:25:31,585 --> 00:25:33,587
[ Beeping]
614
00:25:36,728 --> 00:25:39,592
- Well, we've outrun her
about as long as we can.
615
00:25:39,593 --> 00:25:41,111
[ Radio clicks ]
616
00:25:41,112 --> 00:25:44,873
Rosie, set speed to 120 RPMs.
617
00:25:44,874 --> 00:25:49,671
Helmsman, adjust your heading
to 045 degrees.
618
00:25:49,672 --> 00:25:51,639
Set condition Zebra.
619
00:25:51,640 --> 00:25:54,469
All hands,
prepare for heavy weather.
620
00:25:54,470 --> 00:25:56,022
Secure all openings.
621
00:25:56,023 --> 00:25:58,335
I want this ship
drier than Rosie's stories
622
00:25:58,336 --> 00:26:00,199
about growing up
in Dowagiac.
623
00:26:00,200 --> 00:26:03,651
- Roger that. But you live
for my stories, Cap! Don't lie!
624
00:26:03,652 --> 00:26:05,100
- Engage heeling pumps
on starboard
625
00:26:05,101 --> 00:26:07,102
to counteract portside list.
626
00:26:07,103 --> 00:26:09,415
- Good idea, Tim Leary.
Did you get that, Rosie?
627
00:26:09,416 --> 00:26:11,798
- Heard it and on it.
- [ Thud ]
628
00:26:14,455 --> 00:26:17,665
- Folks, this is the Captain
coming from the bridge deck.
629
00:26:17,666 --> 00:26:19,252
- Well--[ Chuckles]
630
00:26:19,253 --> 00:26:21,738
It's a funny thing about
being surrounded on all sides.
631
00:26:21,739 --> 00:26:23,567
The only way out is through.
632
00:26:23,568 --> 00:26:26,432
Go to your cabins,
secure your belongings,
633
00:26:26,433 --> 00:26:28,572
and brace for rough water.
634
00:26:28,573 --> 00:26:31,576
- Infirmary to Bridge.
Captain, you there?
635
00:26:34,406 --> 00:26:36,649
- Yeah, Max. What do you need?
636
00:26:36,650 --> 00:26:38,340
- Honestly, I need a miracle.
637
00:26:38,341 --> 00:26:40,239
It's Avery.
Her appendix is about to burst.
638
00:26:40,240 --> 00:26:41,654
We need to do emergency surgery.
639
00:26:41,655 --> 00:26:44,139
I need 20 minutes
of calm waters.
640
00:26:44,140 --> 00:26:46,590
[ Ship creaking ]
641
00:26:46,591 --> 00:26:48,868
- Is that 20 consecutive minutes?
642
00:26:48,869 --> 00:26:50,490
- I'll take 'em
how I can get 'em.
643
00:26:50,491 --> 00:26:52,113
- Alright. Stay calm.
644
00:26:52,114 --> 00:26:53,873
Avery's in good hands
with you and Tristan,
645
00:26:53,874 --> 00:26:55,944
and you're in good hands with
me and the bridge crew up here.
646
00:26:55,945 --> 00:26:57,670
I'm gonna get you
that 20 minutes,
647
00:26:57,671 --> 00:26:59,672
but it's not gonna be
all at once.
648
00:26:59,673 --> 00:27:02,399
It's gonna take the
better part of the next hour.
649
00:27:02,400 --> 00:27:05,885
I got an idea.
It's an old seamen's maneuver.
650
00:27:05,886 --> 00:27:08,267
It violates
about 50 nautical laws...
651
00:27:08,268 --> 00:27:10,338
but we'll deal with that later.
652
00:27:10,339 --> 00:27:12,202
The only thing you have to do
is stay calm
653
00:27:12,203 --> 00:27:14,687
and follow my instructions
to the letter.
654
00:27:14,688 --> 00:27:16,309
Can you do it?
655
00:27:16,310 --> 00:27:18,035
- Yes, sir. We can do it.
656
00:27:18,036 --> 00:27:23,454
♪
657
00:27:23,455 --> 00:27:24,628
- Alright.
658
00:27:24,629 --> 00:27:26,906
This is how
"trough riding" works.
659
00:27:26,907 --> 00:27:30,289
We're gonna navigate this storm
in a big zig-zag pattern.
660
00:27:30,290 --> 00:27:32,981
I'm gonna position the ship
in the trough of a wave,
661
00:27:32,982 --> 00:27:35,708
and that should carry us along
for a couple minutes.
662
00:27:35,709 --> 00:27:38,987
When we absolutely have to,
I'll give warning
663
00:27:38,988 --> 00:27:41,887
and we'll make a hard
90-degree turn,
664
00:27:41,888 --> 00:27:43,958
thrust through the wave
and into the next trough,
665
00:27:43,959 --> 00:27:45,718
which should buy us
a couple more minutes.
666
00:27:45,719 --> 00:27:47,789
- So instead of steady rocking,
we'll have moments of calm
667
00:27:47,790 --> 00:27:50,654
followed by "Whoa, mama,
hang on to your hat!"
668
00:27:50,655 --> 00:27:53,450
- [ Chuckles ]
That's exactly right, Rosie.
669
00:27:53,451 --> 00:27:57,178
Guys, the life of one of our own
is on the line down there.
670
00:27:57,179 --> 00:27:58,973
The only way this works
is if we stay
671
00:27:58,974 --> 00:28:01,769
in constant contact
and communication. Copy?
672
00:28:01,770 --> 00:28:03,633
- Yes, sir.
- Copy that.
673
00:28:05,083 --> 00:28:06,982
[ Monitor beeping ]
674
00:28:09,191 --> 00:28:10,916
- How am I supposed
to pull this off, huh?
675
00:28:10,917 --> 00:28:12,641
Without you bossing me around?
676
00:28:12,642 --> 00:28:14,091
- Just remember--
if you kill me,
677
00:28:14,092 --> 00:28:15,921
my ghost is gonna come
crop-dust you
678
00:28:15,922 --> 00:28:17,750
every time
you're alone with a girl.
679
00:28:17,751 --> 00:28:19,546
- [ Chuckles ]
680
00:28:27,450 --> 00:28:29,210
[ Exhales heavily ]
681
00:28:29,211 --> 00:28:31,315
- Intubating now.
682
00:28:31,316 --> 00:28:34,526
- Alright, team.
We're entering the first trough.
683
00:28:36,252 --> 00:28:38,909
- Cutting along
the McBurney line now.
684
00:28:38,910 --> 00:28:40,462
Access.
685
00:28:40,463 --> 00:28:46,675
♪
686
00:28:46,676 --> 00:28:49,540
Locating the appendix.
687
00:28:49,541 --> 00:28:50,783
- Got it.
688
00:28:50,784 --> 00:28:52,890
- Time's up!
I gotta make the turn!
689
00:28:54,512 --> 00:28:55,961
- One sec, Cap!
690
00:28:55,962 --> 00:28:57,825
- Don't have it. Brace now.
691
00:28:57,826 --> 00:28:59,447
[ Clattering ]
692
00:28:59,448 --> 00:29:05,108
♪
693
00:29:05,109 --> 00:29:08,145
- Watch it. If those hit
the ground, they're useless.
694
00:29:08,146 --> 00:29:15,877
♪
695
00:29:15,878 --> 00:29:17,706
- Yeah. There it is. I got it.
696
00:29:17,707 --> 00:29:20,606
♪
697
00:29:20,607 --> 00:29:21,710
- Clamp.
698
00:29:21,711 --> 00:29:24,644
♪
699
00:29:24,645 --> 00:29:25,680
[ Snip ]
700
00:29:25,681 --> 00:29:26,715
Clamp.
701
00:29:26,716 --> 00:29:28,131
♪
702
00:29:28,132 --> 00:29:29,511
[ Snip ]
703
00:29:29,512 --> 00:29:35,759
♪
704
00:29:35,760 --> 00:29:38,348
- Brace for impact. Brace!
705
00:29:38,349 --> 00:29:40,315
[ Thunder crashes ]
706
00:29:40,316 --> 00:29:43,284
♪
707
00:29:43,285 --> 00:29:46,874
- Sir, the wind. It's changing
direction on us.
708
00:29:46,875 --> 00:29:49,048
- We got a rogue wave coming.
709
00:29:49,049 --> 00:29:51,154
Get ready. Brace yourself now!
710
00:29:51,155 --> 00:29:53,294
[ Thunder crashes ]
711
00:29:53,295 --> 00:29:55,848
[ Clattering ]
712
00:29:55,849 --> 00:29:57,643
[ Ship creaking ]
713
00:29:57,644 --> 00:30:02,165
♪
714
00:30:02,166 --> 00:30:04,581
- Ligatures are loose.
I got uncontrolled bleeding.
715
00:30:04,582 --> 00:30:06,825
I need visualization, stat.
716
00:30:06,826 --> 00:30:08,309
[ Rapid beeping ]
717
00:30:08,310 --> 00:30:14,039
♪
718
00:30:14,040 --> 00:30:15,869
[ Suctioning ]
719
00:30:17,146 --> 00:30:18,665
Yeah. We're good.
720
00:30:20,253 --> 00:30:22,185
- We're okay, Cap.
We lost you there.
721
00:30:22,186 --> 00:30:24,601
But we're okay.
All three of us.
722
00:30:24,602 --> 00:30:26,430
- Well, I'm glad to hear it.
723
00:30:26,431 --> 00:30:29,226
It's not over yet, but I think
we're through the worst of it.
724
00:30:29,227 --> 00:30:36,509
♪
725
00:30:36,510 --> 00:30:38,028
- It's still too shaky.
726
00:30:38,029 --> 00:30:39,754
I can't get the sutures
to stick.
727
00:30:39,755 --> 00:30:41,239
- Can I?
728
00:30:44,656 --> 00:30:50,006
♪
729
00:30:50,007 --> 00:30:51,560
- Got it.
730
00:30:52,078 --> 00:30:56,012
- We call this
the "cruise ship knot."
731
00:30:56,013 --> 00:30:58,462
It's the same
as a square knot,
732
00:30:58,463 --> 00:31:00,913
but you double the back loops.
733
00:31:00,914 --> 00:31:02,881
You see?
734
00:31:02,882 --> 00:31:04,710
Scissors.
735
00:31:04,711 --> 00:31:08,265
- That's actually... very smart.
736
00:31:08,266 --> 00:31:10,336
- Well...
737
00:31:10,337 --> 00:31:12,511
I do know some things, Doc.
738
00:31:12,512 --> 00:31:17,171
♪
739
00:31:17,172 --> 00:31:19,380
- Whoo!
- Yes.
740
00:31:19,381 --> 00:31:22,935
- Yeah, baby! That was fun!
Wanna do it again?
741
00:31:22,936 --> 00:31:26,180
- Whoo! That's what
I'm talking about, baby!
742
00:31:26,181 --> 00:31:34,291
♪
743
00:31:34,292 --> 00:31:36,638
- Hey, Tristan...
744
00:31:36,639 --> 00:31:38,640
You know a lot more
than some things.
745
00:31:38,641 --> 00:31:41,195
That was incredible work.
746
00:31:41,196 --> 00:31:43,922
I wouldn't have wanted
anybody else in there with me.
747
00:31:43,923 --> 00:31:50,722
♪
748
00:31:56,245 --> 00:31:58,765
[ Monitor beeping ]
749
00:32:00,456 --> 00:32:02,043
- Her blood pressure's dropping.
Heartbeat's irregular.
750
00:32:02,044 --> 00:32:04,356
- Looks like she vomited
during the storm.
751
00:32:04,357 --> 00:32:05,426
Let's get her on her side
so she doesn't aspirate.
752
00:32:05,427 --> 00:32:08,049
- Yeah.
- Ready? One. Two. Three.
753
00:32:08,050 --> 00:32:09,602
- Do you think it's drugs?
754
00:32:09,603 --> 00:32:11,466
Hallucinogenic therapy?
755
00:32:11,467 --> 00:32:13,882
- I'm not so sure.
Look at her wrists. Swelling.
756
00:32:13,883 --> 00:32:15,919
Yellowing of the fingernails.
757
00:32:15,920 --> 00:32:18,197
- Jaundice.
Something to do with her liver.
758
00:32:18,198 --> 00:32:20,130
- [ Vomits ]
759
00:32:20,131 --> 00:32:21,821
[ Groans ]
760
00:32:21,822 --> 00:32:23,169
Oh.
761
00:32:24,101 --> 00:32:26,412
Such negative auras.
762
00:32:26,413 --> 00:32:27,863
Ugh.
763
00:32:29,761 --> 00:32:31,624
- That's what she said to me
when we first met.
764
00:32:31,625 --> 00:32:34,007
I had a "crimson aura."
765
00:32:36,285 --> 00:32:37,837
Bingo.
766
00:32:37,838 --> 00:32:39,391
Kayser-Fleischer rings.
767
00:32:39,392 --> 00:32:42,635
- Uh, w-what?
- It's copper poisoning.
768
00:32:42,636 --> 00:32:45,017
Y-You see the rust-colored rings
around her Iris?
769
00:32:45,018 --> 00:32:46,467
- Mm-hmm.
- That's why she's seeing auras.
770
00:32:46,468 --> 00:32:47,986
Her vision's clouded.
It also explains
771
00:32:47,987 --> 00:32:50,816
the neurological symptoms
and the ataxia.
772
00:32:50,817 --> 00:32:53,750
Organ meat-- extremely high
in heavy metals.
773
00:32:53,751 --> 00:32:56,580
And liver is high in copper.
She needs chelation therapy.
774
00:32:56,581 --> 00:32:57,961
We need to detox her system.
775
00:32:57,962 --> 00:32:59,583
Let's get her on an I.V.
of penicillamine.
776
00:32:59,584 --> 00:33:01,033
- Yeah.
- Ondansetron for nausea.
777
00:33:01,034 --> 00:33:02,724
Also let's put her
on a normal saline bolus
778
00:33:02,725 --> 00:33:04,933
just to flush out her system.
- I got it.
779
00:33:04,934 --> 00:33:11,388
♪
780
00:33:11,389 --> 00:33:13,357
[ Dinging ]
781
00:33:22,400 --> 00:33:25,057
- [ Dinging ]
- Hmm.
782
00:33:25,058 --> 00:33:28,198
Energy meridians run
like streams through the body.
783
00:33:28,199 --> 00:33:31,408
Strong emotions muddy
the waters, pollute the soul.
784
00:33:31,409 --> 00:33:34,101
- Agnes, are you sure
you're ready to do this?
785
00:33:34,102 --> 00:33:36,344
I mean, I thought I killed you.
786
00:33:36,345 --> 00:33:38,829
- Sweetie, it's gonna take
more than a smoothie
to get rid of me.
787
00:33:38,830 --> 00:33:40,279
Hm!
788
00:33:40,280 --> 00:33:43,282
- I'm closing up shop.
I've blended my last bebida.
789
00:33:43,283 --> 00:33:45,698
- Judy, sweetie, you're a healer,
for Goddess' sake.
790
00:33:45,699 --> 00:33:47,769
You can't quit that easy.
791
00:33:47,770 --> 00:33:49,185
Did I ever tell you
about that pro golfer
792
00:33:49,186 --> 00:33:50,669
whose shoulder I was working on?
793
00:33:50,670 --> 00:33:52,464
I can't say who he is,
of course,
794
00:33:52,465 --> 00:33:54,983
but let's just say
he was a real "big cat"
795
00:33:54,984 --> 00:33:55,984
if you catch my drift.
796
00:33:55,985 --> 00:33:57,193
It was Tiger Woods. Yeah.
797
00:33:57,194 --> 00:33:59,781
I was tapping his Yunmen,
the cloud gate,
798
00:33:59,782 --> 00:34:01,438
but I was a millimeter off.
799
00:34:01,439 --> 00:34:03,337
He lost sensation
in his whole arm
800
00:34:03,338 --> 00:34:05,201
a week before the Masters.
801
00:34:05,202 --> 00:34:08,238
Gradually over the next
six days, sensation returned.
802
00:34:08,239 --> 00:34:10,896
And that weekend,
he shot 18 below par,
803
00:34:10,897 --> 00:34:14,244
took home the Green Jacket.
804
00:34:14,245 --> 00:34:17,765
It's amazing what miracles
can happen with catastrophe.
805
00:34:17,766 --> 00:34:21,632
Huh. I'm sensing
a real imbalance right
here in your Tianliao.
806
00:34:22,771 --> 00:34:24,599
Yeah. Inhale deeply for me.
807
00:34:24,600 --> 00:34:26,775
- [ Inhales deeply ]
808
00:34:28,811 --> 00:34:31,123
Ooh.
That one felt kind of funny.
809
00:34:31,124 --> 00:34:34,022
- Oh, yeah. That's toxicity
leaving the body.
810
00:34:34,023 --> 00:34:37,371
Now exhale all that negativity.
811
00:34:37,372 --> 00:34:38,683
- [ Groans loudly ]
812
00:34:40,444 --> 00:34:43,791
[ Groaning ]
813
00:34:43,792 --> 00:34:46,725
♪
814
00:34:46,726 --> 00:34:48,520
- Judy, does it hurt
when you breathe?
815
00:34:48,521 --> 00:34:50,901
- Yes.
- Her lips are turning blue.
816
00:34:50,902 --> 00:34:53,283
Central cyanosis.
O2 SATS are at 88%.
817
00:34:53,284 --> 00:34:55,147
She needs oxygen.
- How long are these needles?
818
00:34:55,148 --> 00:34:58,081
- Uh, they range. The black
ones are 100 millimeters.
819
00:34:58,082 --> 00:35:00,359
- 100 millimeters?
820
00:35:00,360 --> 00:35:03,707
The intrapleural space
is 25 millimeters,
821
00:35:03,708 --> 00:35:05,468
so what you've done here
is punctured her lung.
822
00:35:05,469 --> 00:35:07,711
Now all the air is rushing
out into her chest cavity
823
00:35:07,712 --> 00:35:09,057
and it's crushing
her heart and lungs.
824
00:35:09,058 --> 00:35:11,474
- O2 SATS are at 70.
- Prep for a thoracostomy.
825
00:35:11,475 --> 00:35:12,958
I'm gonna get
these needles out now.
826
00:35:12,959 --> 00:35:14,304
- No! No, no, no!
Are you crazy?!
827
00:35:14,305 --> 00:35:15,685
If you interrupt
her treatment now,
828
00:35:15,686 --> 00:35:17,342
you could permanently alter
her energy pathways!
829
00:35:17,343 --> 00:35:19,585
What she needs is
to breathe through this.
830
00:35:19,586 --> 00:35:21,035
- The only way
she's breathing through this
831
00:35:21,036 --> 00:35:22,450
is through a chest tube.
- [ Scoffs ]
832
00:35:22,451 --> 00:35:25,143
- Judy, when I tell you,
I'm gonna need you
833
00:35:25,144 --> 00:35:27,179
to breathe out all the air
in your lungs and hold it.
834
00:35:27,180 --> 00:35:28,215
Okay?
835
00:35:28,216 --> 00:35:33,254
[ Judy moaning ]
836
00:35:33,255 --> 00:35:36,326
♪
837
00:35:36,327 --> 00:35:38,225
Scalpel.
838
00:35:38,226 --> 00:35:39,398
Ready?
839
00:35:39,399 --> 00:35:40,951
- Hm.
840
00:35:40,952 --> 00:35:43,126
- Okay. Now.
841
00:35:43,127 --> 00:35:46,474
[ Judy groaning ]
842
00:35:46,475 --> 00:35:50,478
♪
843
00:35:50,479 --> 00:35:51,755
This is gonna hurt a little.
844
00:35:51,756 --> 00:35:54,448
[ Judy groaning loudly ]
845
00:35:54,449 --> 00:35:57,520
♪
846
00:35:57,521 --> 00:36:00,454
[ Judy groaning ]
847
00:36:00,455 --> 00:36:02,007
[ Judy whimpers ]
848
00:36:02,008 --> 00:36:03,595
Drape.
- Okay.
849
00:36:03,596 --> 00:36:05,769
- Finish dressing the wound.
Monitor her vitals.
850
00:36:05,770 --> 00:36:07,219
I'm gonna go check on Avery.
- She's fine.
851
00:36:07,220 --> 00:36:08,427
She's better than ever, actually.
852
00:36:08,428 --> 00:36:10,465
She needed this.
She needed this.
853
00:36:19,025 --> 00:36:20,232
[ Elevator bell dings ]
854
00:36:20,233 --> 00:36:21,509
- You!
855
00:36:21,510 --> 00:36:23,616
- [ Sighs ] Me.
856
00:36:24,651 --> 00:36:26,238
[ Sighs ]
857
00:36:26,239 --> 00:36:31,416
I must say. This is feeling
very "Gift of the Magi."
858
00:36:31,417 --> 00:36:35,972
- Is that that story about
the poor husband and wife
859
00:36:35,973 --> 00:36:39,839
who try to buy each other
the perfect Christmas present?
860
00:36:40,736 --> 00:36:43,255
She sells her hair
to buy him a watch chain.
861
00:36:43,256 --> 00:36:46,258
He sells his watch
to buy her a comb.
862
00:36:46,259 --> 00:36:48,571
- Two people
with the purest of intentions
863
00:36:48,572 --> 00:36:50,918
ensnared by
the cruelest circumstances.
864
00:36:50,919 --> 00:36:52,575
- Are you trying to turn
this into some kind of--
865
00:36:52,576 --> 00:36:53,852
- Shh, shh, shh.
Sweetie, sweetie.
866
00:36:53,853 --> 00:36:56,095
I can intuit
what you're thinking.
867
00:36:56,096 --> 00:36:59,237
Okay? And I forgive you.
868
00:36:59,238 --> 00:37:02,309
- You nearly killed me,
you carnival-act fraud.
869
00:37:02,310 --> 00:37:03,620
[ Elevator bell dings ]
870
00:37:03,621 --> 00:37:05,243
[ Both screaming ]
871
00:37:05,244 --> 00:37:08,143
- Stop! Break it up!
- She crossed a boundary!
872
00:37:10,076 --> 00:37:13,285
- I am thrilled to announce
the launch of our new product,
873
00:37:13,286 --> 00:37:17,634
B. Welles Detox, a high-quality,
at-home chelation system
874
00:37:17,635 --> 00:37:21,294
that will help remove heavy
toxic metals from our systems.
875
00:37:22,261 --> 00:37:24,054
- Pollutants she put there.
876
00:37:24,055 --> 00:37:25,677
- [ Chuckles ]
877
00:37:25,678 --> 00:37:28,818
Stay super sweet.
Really beautiful dress.
878
00:37:28,819 --> 00:37:31,924
Anyhoozle...
I'm very excited to say
879
00:37:31,925 --> 00:37:35,342
that I'll be partnering with
the fabulous Purdue Pharma.
880
00:37:35,343 --> 00:37:38,138
[ Giggles ]
Can we do another one, Rowan?
881
00:37:39,278 --> 00:37:41,934
- I am ending up with
some ceremonial-grade lip balm.
882
00:37:41,935 --> 00:37:43,384
- As am I.
883
00:37:43,385 --> 00:37:46,076
- Oh. Big bet.
- Big time.
884
00:37:46,077 --> 00:37:47,802
- Wait a minute.
885
00:37:47,803 --> 00:37:50,529
Are you gambling with
precious B. Welles products?
886
00:37:50,530 --> 00:37:52,635
- And losing quite badly,
I might add.
887
00:37:52,636 --> 00:37:55,948
- I would happily trade all the
serums and balms in the world
888
00:37:55,949 --> 00:37:59,262
to never have to do
a Wellness Week ever again.
889
00:37:59,263 --> 00:38:02,645
- Hear, hear. Cap? Please?
No, we can't.
890
00:38:02,646 --> 00:38:05,786
- I'm one step ahead
of you whiners. As usual.
891
00:38:05,787 --> 00:38:08,271
I spoke to Lenore this morning.
892
00:38:08,272 --> 00:38:10,894
We are not renewing
with B. Welles.
893
00:38:10,895 --> 00:38:13,449
Didn't hurt that Lenore
had broken out in hives
894
00:38:13,450 --> 00:38:17,315
from one of the sunless tanners
that Bethany had given her.
895
00:38:17,316 --> 00:38:18,868
[ Chuckles ]
- Well, from now on,
896
00:38:18,869 --> 00:38:21,560
when it comes to wellness,
I'm sticking to the classics.
897
00:38:21,561 --> 00:38:24,356
Eat your veggies,
take the stairs, drink water.
898
00:38:24,357 --> 00:38:25,633
- And regular checkups.
899
00:38:25,634 --> 00:38:28,291
- And maybe a colonic
here or there.
900
00:38:28,292 --> 00:38:30,293
- Hi. Soup.
901
00:38:30,294 --> 00:38:33,192
It's cooked. I promise.
902
00:38:33,193 --> 00:38:35,781
- Is this an olive branch?
903
00:38:35,782 --> 00:38:37,990
- Uh, well,
it's my chicken cassoulet
904
00:38:37,991 --> 00:38:40,717
with basil oil
and white truffle.
905
00:38:40,718 --> 00:38:44,514
All of that raw-meat stuff,
that was Bethany.
906
00:38:44,515 --> 00:38:46,861
This is more me.
907
00:38:46,862 --> 00:38:48,622
- Oh, wow.
908
00:38:48,623 --> 00:38:51,383
That's, um--
That's incredible.
909
00:38:51,384 --> 00:38:53,696
- Well, there's more
where that came from.
910
00:38:53,697 --> 00:38:57,009
- Uh, reminds me--
Chef Ricamore has, uh,
911
00:38:57,010 --> 00:39:00,323
suddenly made an abrupt
departure from the Odyssey.
912
00:39:00,324 --> 00:39:03,740
Something crazy like a newborn
baby girl or something.
913
00:39:03,741 --> 00:39:06,709
So Vivian has graciously agreed
914
00:39:06,710 --> 00:39:08,849
to stay with us
for the rest of the season.
915
00:39:08,850 --> 00:39:11,472
- Oh, wait. You, uh--
You quit your job with Bethany?
916
00:39:11,473 --> 00:39:13,336
Congrats.
- Yeah.
917
00:39:13,337 --> 00:39:16,788
She gave a whole new meaning
to toxic work environment.
918
00:39:16,789 --> 00:39:18,030
- Mm-hmm.
- I'm looking forward to
919
00:39:18,031 --> 00:39:20,136
cooking for people
who are actually sane.
920
00:39:20,137 --> 00:39:21,896
[ Laughter ]
921
00:39:21,897 --> 00:39:24,830
- Oh, well, let me know
when you find those people.
922
00:39:24,831 --> 00:39:26,591
[ Ship horn blares ]
923
00:39:26,592 --> 00:39:29,179
Okay. Well, that's my cue.
924
00:39:29,180 --> 00:39:33,080
This week, I give you three
permission to stay below deck
925
00:39:33,081 --> 00:39:36,324
while we manage
the disembarkment.
926
00:39:36,325 --> 00:39:37,498
Come with me?
927
00:39:37,499 --> 00:39:38,844
- Yeah. I'll, um--
I'll see you around.
928
00:39:38,845 --> 00:39:39,949
- Yeah, yeah. Okay.
929
00:39:39,950 --> 00:39:43,021
I will catch you
on the port side. Ha-ha.
930
00:39:43,022 --> 00:39:44,988
Really, Tristan?
931
00:39:44,989 --> 00:39:46,783
- Real talk.
932
00:39:46,784 --> 00:39:48,578
I almost died last night,
didn't I?
933
00:39:48,579 --> 00:39:50,028
- What?! No.
934
00:39:50,029 --> 00:39:51,857
- Once you were out,
there were hardly any waves.
935
00:39:51,858 --> 00:39:54,895
Honestly. We breezed right
through it. It was simple.
936
00:39:54,896 --> 00:39:58,243
- Hmm. Yeah. Okay.
Go on. Get out of here.
937
00:39:58,244 --> 00:39:59,934
You only get two days
before the next cruise.
938
00:39:59,935 --> 00:40:03,213
You don't want to
waste them here.
939
00:40:03,214 --> 00:40:06,700
Roller skating on the boardwalk
or play Whac-A-Mole
940
00:40:06,701 --> 00:40:08,702
or whatever it is you do
in your free time.
What are you doing?
941
00:40:08,703 --> 00:40:10,876
- You know, I was never
any good at roller-skating.
942
00:40:10,877 --> 00:40:14,466
- I don't play Whac-A-Mole
because of ethical issues.
943
00:40:14,467 --> 00:40:16,986
Animal cruelty.
944
00:40:16,987 --> 00:40:18,401
Now, if you're not
gonna eat that soup,
945
00:40:18,402 --> 00:40:20,299
I have a delicious new recipe.
946
00:40:20,300 --> 00:40:22,543
It's pizza rolls,
but you don't cook them.
947
00:40:22,544 --> 00:40:23,820
You eat them raw.
948
00:40:23,821 --> 00:40:25,512
- Yes, we plucked them
from the pepperoni tree,
949
00:40:25,513 --> 00:40:27,030
just like our ancestors used to.
950
00:40:27,031 --> 00:40:30,482
- [ Laughs ] Ah. Idiots.
Both of you.
951
00:40:30,483 --> 00:40:34,175
If I bust these sutures,
you're fixing 'em.
952
00:40:34,176 --> 00:40:36,281
Ugh. Okay. Deal me a hand.
953
00:40:36,282 --> 00:40:37,558
I think I'm getting
the hang of this.
954
00:40:37,559 --> 00:40:39,111
- Ceremonial-grade lip balm.
955
00:40:39,112 --> 00:40:40,906
What kind of ceremony
needs lip balm?
956
00:40:40,907 --> 00:40:43,115
- Oh, wouldn't you love to know?
957
00:40:43,116 --> 00:40:44,979
[ Laughter ]
958
00:40:44,980 --> 00:40:47,465
Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow!
959
00:40:47,466 --> 00:40:49,397
- Your sutures.
- Ow!
960
00:40:49,398 --> 00:40:50,985
[ Indistinct conversation ]
961
00:40:50,986 --> 00:40:52,229
- Stop it.
962
00:40:56,509 --> 00:41:21,879
♪
66301
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