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1
00:00:01,173 --> 00:00:04,245
We've constructed
a paradise here...
2
00:00:04,245 --> 00:00:06,972
but the world
is still the world.
3
00:00:06,972 --> 00:00:08,732
- Defib!
- I don't have a pulse.
4
00:00:08,732 --> 00:00:11,321
Max. He's gone.
5
00:00:11,321 --> 00:00:13,979
I spoke to the captain,
and if you wanted.
6
00:00:13,979 --> 00:00:15,808
if you decided that you
would like to be an M.D.,
7
00:00:15,808 --> 00:00:18,225
he will support you
for a full scholarship.
8
00:00:20,296 --> 00:00:21,987
It was never real.
9
00:00:21,987 --> 00:00:24,265
I was never in love with Avery
to begin with.
10
00:00:24,265 --> 00:00:27,924
I think I just heard you
give me your inherent blessing.
11
00:00:27,924 --> 00:00:29,132
Is it a bad idea?
12
00:00:29,132 --> 00:00:31,203
Sleeping with a subordinate?
13
00:00:32,101 --> 00:00:34,965
Alright, you scallywags.
14
00:00:34,965 --> 00:00:38,107
The heat's on. Bets are in.
Let's draw.
15
00:00:39,522 --> 00:00:41,972
If this were
Settlers of Catan,
16
00:00:41,972 --> 00:00:44,182
I'm telling you...
whole different story.
17
00:00:44,182 --> 00:00:45,459
Mm-hmm.
18
00:00:45,459 --> 00:00:46,701
I'll trade two.
19
00:00:46,701 --> 00:00:48,082
Two please, Cap.
20
00:00:48,082 --> 00:00:49,980
So, we all jazzed
for "Welles-ness Week"
21
00:00:49,980 --> 00:00:51,396
with Bethany Welles?
22
00:00:51,396 --> 00:00:53,398
I had to Zoom with her
two weeks ago.
23
00:00:53,398 --> 00:00:55,262
Bethany asked me,
the head of housekeeping,
24
00:00:55,262 --> 00:00:56,918
to personally wash
all the linens
25
00:00:56,918 --> 00:00:58,265
in her own special detergent
26
00:00:58,265 --> 00:01:00,439
made from
pickled cucumber brine.
27
00:01:00,439 --> 00:01:02,924
Aren't pickled cucumbers
just pickles?
28
00:01:02,924 --> 00:01:04,547
This woman
is a wellness celebrity.
29
00:01:04,547 --> 00:01:06,411
She has no idea
about what we do,
30
00:01:06,411 --> 00:01:09,621
and yet, for a week, we give her
the keys to the kingdom.
31
00:01:09,621 --> 00:01:11,864
It's like putting a toddler
behind a Mack truck
32
00:01:11,864 --> 00:01:13,728
and saying, "Happy trails."
33
00:01:13,728 --> 00:01:16,697
Why on Earth would we give
this woman that much power?
34
00:01:16,697 --> 00:01:19,286
Oh, naive little Dr. Odyssey.
35
00:01:19,286 --> 00:01:22,530
There are exactly
10.2 million reasons why.
36
00:01:22,530 --> 00:01:24,256
Instagram followers.
37
00:01:24,256 --> 00:01:27,432
Her company sponsors
this Wellness Week.
38
00:01:27,432 --> 00:01:30,745
And it's a very public,
very big deal,
39
00:01:30,745 --> 00:01:33,231
so we kind of have
a little balancing act here.
40
00:01:33,231 --> 00:01:38,098
We do our jobs
while simultaneously tolerating
41
00:01:38,098 --> 00:01:40,721
Bethany's wackadoodle quirks.
42
00:01:40,721 --> 00:01:43,379
Last year, she tried to
get me to use corn ethanol
43
00:01:43,379 --> 00:01:44,725
to power the ship.
44
00:01:44,725 --> 00:01:46,140
Corn.
45
00:01:46,140 --> 00:01:48,901
I tell you, this whole, uh,
"global warming" crap
46
00:01:48,901 --> 00:01:50,834
is just so overblown.
47
00:01:50,834 --> 00:01:53,320
Global warming is overblown?
48
00:01:53,320 --> 00:01:54,907
Just this week,
we'll re-routing around
49
00:01:54,907 --> 00:01:57,220
a major tropical depression
off the coast of Baja.
50
00:01:57,220 --> 00:01:58,773
Tell me, when have we ever
had tropical depressions
51
00:01:58,773 --> 00:02:00,154
in this time of year?
- Well, if the Earth's
52
00:02:00,154 --> 00:02:02,191
getting so hot,
then you just explain to me
53
00:02:02,191 --> 00:02:04,158
why there was 8 feet
of flipping snow last Christmas
54
00:02:04,158 --> 00:02:06,954
in my hometown
of Dowagiac, Michigan.
55
00:02:06,954 --> 00:02:10,233
Rosie, I'm gonna tell you,
you're the best damn engineer
56
00:02:10,233 --> 00:02:12,235
that a captain
could ever ask for
57
00:02:12,235 --> 00:02:16,136
and nobody knows
this Odyssey better than you,
58
00:02:16,136 --> 00:02:18,828
but on this point,
you're dead wrong.
59
00:02:18,828 --> 00:02:21,106
I've been on the seas
for the better part of my life
60
00:02:21,106 --> 00:02:24,558
and sailed every ocean
in every condition.
61
00:02:24,558 --> 00:02:26,560
And I can tell ya,
62
00:02:26,560 --> 00:02:29,770
from my experience,
this isn't right.
63
00:02:29,770 --> 00:02:31,668
These storms are stronger
64
00:02:31,668 --> 00:02:35,431
and the hurricane seasons last
months longer than they used to.
65
00:02:36,639 --> 00:02:38,399
But speaking of disasters,
66
00:02:38,399 --> 00:02:41,161
it's time for the rest of you
fools to lose your clothing.
67
00:02:41,161 --> 00:02:42,852
- Ah.
- Good.
68
00:02:42,852 --> 00:02:45,026
- Who's still in?
- I'm out like Ellen.
69
00:02:45,026 --> 00:02:47,995
Ooh.
70
00:02:47,995 --> 00:02:49,272
Ohh!
71
00:02:49,272 --> 00:02:53,242
Rosie, you can smell that thing
in Buenaventura.
72
00:02:53,242 --> 00:02:57,315
Uh, yeah. I'm out, Cap.
You got me, too.
73
00:02:58,316 --> 00:03:00,387
Fold, but...
74
00:03:00,387 --> 00:03:02,803
Well, joke's on you.
75
00:03:02,803 --> 00:03:04,080
I'm an exhibitionist.
76
00:03:04,080 --> 00:03:06,358
Ha ha ah! There he is!
77
00:03:06,358 --> 00:03:08,498
Well, look, first
I want to just say
78
00:03:08,498 --> 00:03:09,775
thank you for inviting me
79
00:03:09,775 --> 00:03:11,467
to the Boys and Butches
card game.
80
00:03:11,467 --> 00:03:12,640
And "Bi's."
81
00:03:12,640 --> 00:03:14,332
Sorry.
Boys, Butches, and Bi's.
82
00:03:14,332 --> 00:03:17,749
And in that spirit of inclusion,
I would like to say...
83
00:03:17,749 --> 00:03:19,406
I'm in.
84
00:03:19,406 --> 00:03:20,579
Really?
85
00:03:20,579 --> 00:03:22,547
- Really.
- Okay.
86
00:03:23,962 --> 00:03:24,963
Three cowboys.
87
00:03:26,033 --> 00:03:28,380
Ooh!
88
00:03:28,380 --> 00:03:30,969
"How rude" is the catchphrase
89
00:03:30,969 --> 00:03:33,454
of Stephanie Tanner
on my favorite sitcom...
90
00:03:33,454 --> 00:03:36,112
- Oh, no.
- Oh! Come on.
91
00:03:36,112 --> 00:03:37,734
Come on!
- ..."Full House."
92
00:03:40,565 --> 00:03:42,256
Okay.
93
00:03:43,671 --> 00:03:45,811
Oh.
94
00:03:45,811 --> 00:03:48,711
- Hey!
- Okay. There we go!
95
00:03:48,711 --> 00:03:50,195
Why not the...
96
00:03:50,195 --> 00:03:52,059
The hat always stays on.
97
00:03:53,957 --> 00:03:56,063
Well, that's game for me.
98
00:03:56,063 --> 00:03:57,892
Remember--
this week, chins up.
99
00:03:57,892 --> 00:04:00,205
We can navigate
around any rough waters,
100
00:04:00,205 --> 00:04:04,105
and we can navigate around the
peculiarities of Bethany Welles.
101
00:04:04,105 --> 00:04:05,969
So no tropical depressions,
102
00:04:05,969 --> 00:04:10,180
either atmospheric or emotional,
are gonna darken our days.
103
00:04:10,180 --> 00:04:12,735
I forecast smiles
104
00:04:12,735 --> 00:04:16,532
and smooth sailing
and sunny skies!
105
00:04:16,532 --> 00:04:18,119
Good night, y'all.
106
00:04:18,119 --> 00:04:19,914
- Night, Cap.
- Night, Cap.
107
00:04:30,546 --> 00:04:32,479
Are we still on course?
108
00:04:32,479 --> 00:04:34,515
Barely maintaining.
109
00:04:34,515 --> 00:04:38,243
Alright, team.
We're entering the first trough.
110
00:04:40,487 --> 00:04:43,490
Alright. Brace for impact.
- Brace!
111
00:04:55,364 --> 00:04:59,160
So I got a letter yesterday,
and, uh...
112
00:04:59,160 --> 00:05:02,198
Well, uh, I got it.
113
00:05:02,198 --> 00:05:04,165
I got the scholarship.
114
00:05:04,165 --> 00:05:06,375
Yeah.
- That's amazing!
115
00:05:06,375 --> 00:05:08,135
Thank you!
Oh, congratulations!
116
00:05:08,135 --> 00:05:09,964
Thanks. Thanks.
117
00:05:09,964 --> 00:05:11,621
You're gonna be a doctor.
118
00:05:11,621 --> 00:05:13,451
You're going to med school.
You're leaving.
119
00:05:13,451 --> 00:05:15,107
- Y-Yeah. Yeah. I guess so.
- Wow.
120
00:05:15,107 --> 00:05:16,626
- Yeah.
- Man, I'm so happy for you.
121
00:05:16,626 --> 00:05:17,972
That's-- That's great.
- Thank you.
122
00:05:17,972 --> 00:05:19,249
- That is great.
- Thank you so much.
123
00:05:19,249 --> 00:05:20,975
Yeah.
124
00:05:24,013 --> 00:05:25,359
Hey. Should we--
- Do you want to--
125
00:05:25,359 --> 00:05:27,637
Well, I just wanted to
check in and make sure
126
00:05:27,637 --> 00:05:29,190
if you wanted to talk about
what happened, but...
127
00:05:29,190 --> 00:05:31,054
Uh, I mean, I don't have
to talk about what happened.
128
00:05:31,054 --> 00:05:32,573
Do you want to talk
about what happened?
- Oh. No, no.
129
00:05:32,573 --> 00:05:34,023
Then I-- No, no, no. I'm good.
If you're good, I'm good.
130
00:05:34,023 --> 00:05:35,127
- We're great.
- Okay. We're good.
131
00:05:35,127 --> 00:05:37,440
- Yeah. That's good.
- Yeah. Good.
132
00:05:40,132 --> 00:05:43,066
Well, congratulations.
I-I'm really happy for you.
133
00:06:01,084 --> 00:06:03,570
Oh, my God. Oh, my God!
134
00:06:03,570 --> 00:06:05,019
That's Agnes Simkin!
135
00:06:05,019 --> 00:06:06,676
She's an acupuncturist
and a psychic.
136
00:06:06,676 --> 00:06:08,160
She's helped
thousands of people
137
00:06:08,160 --> 00:06:09,403
diagnose chronic conditions.
138
00:06:09,403 --> 00:06:11,750
Unbelievable. Why rely
on the scientific method
139
00:06:11,750 --> 00:06:13,925
when you can just read
your patient's palm?
140
00:06:13,925 --> 00:06:15,409
You both really think
141
00:06:15,409 --> 00:06:17,135
Western medicine
has everything figured out?
142
00:06:17,135 --> 00:06:18,688
Well, all I know
is that when I get sick,
143
00:06:18,688 --> 00:06:21,864
I go to a doctor for some pills,
not a witch for some toadstools.
144
00:06:23,417 --> 00:06:24,936
Taxus brevifolia.
145
00:06:24,936 --> 00:06:26,938
A.k.a. the Pacific yew tree.
146
00:06:26,938 --> 00:06:29,492
Its bark contains paclitaxel,
better known as Taxol,
147
00:06:29,492 --> 00:06:30,942
the life-saving
chemotherapy drug.
148
00:06:30,942 --> 00:06:32,702
Practitioners were called crazy
when they first started
149
00:06:32,702 --> 00:06:35,464
using it as a cancer treatment.
- Yeah, but maybe for this week,
150
00:06:35,464 --> 00:06:38,087
we don't use that word--
"crazy."
151
00:06:56,381 --> 00:06:59,108
Mi Capitàn! Buenos dias!
152
00:06:59,108 --> 00:07:00,799
Muy bueno to be back!
153
00:07:00,799 --> 00:07:02,939
Bienvenida, Bethany.
154
00:07:02,939 --> 00:07:04,216
Todo es bien.
155
00:07:04,216 --> 00:07:06,218
Look at those sapphire eyes.
156
00:07:06,218 --> 00:07:09,152
Oh! You're just so handsome!
I came bearing gifts.
157
00:07:09,152 --> 00:07:10,947
- That's so nice.
- And you get a prize.
158
00:07:10,947 --> 00:07:13,122
- Thank you.
- And you get a prize.
159
00:07:13,122 --> 00:07:14,295
And you get a prize.
- Thank you.
160
00:07:14,295 --> 00:07:15,573
- Captain!
- And, Captain...
161
00:07:15,573 --> 00:07:18,299
Uh-- Oh. I'm sorry.
Excuse me one second.
162
00:07:19,646 --> 00:07:22,614
Do you know what this is?!
163
00:07:22,614 --> 00:07:24,996
Ozone therapy.
164
00:07:24,996 --> 00:07:27,067
Where does that tube go?
165
00:07:27,067 --> 00:07:28,931
It's a rectal application.
166
00:07:28,931 --> 00:07:31,347
Wellness culture.
It's my agony. It's my ecstasy.
167
00:07:31,347 --> 00:07:32,624
Sue me.
168
00:07:32,624 --> 00:07:35,765
Avery!
Oh, my radiant daughter!
169
00:07:35,765 --> 00:07:37,664
Look at you!
170
00:07:37,664 --> 00:07:40,045
You know, it's time to cut
that thing out of your life.
171
00:07:40,045 --> 00:07:41,771
And I know you know
what I'm talking about.
172
00:07:41,771 --> 00:07:43,428
Yes, yes.
173
00:07:43,428 --> 00:07:47,087
We'll talk later about it.
You must be the doctor!
174
00:07:47,087 --> 00:07:49,330
Oh. Oh. Your aura.
175
00:07:49,330 --> 00:07:52,402
It's a crimson, bloody shadow!
176
00:07:52,402 --> 00:07:53,749
- Hi. Hi.
- Huh?
177
00:07:53,749 --> 00:07:55,233
- Sorry.
- Ohh.
178
00:07:55,233 --> 00:07:57,822
Hi. I'm Kathy. I came all
they way from Cedar Rapids.
179
00:07:57,822 --> 00:08:00,721
I can't believe
it's really you! I'm crying!
180
00:08:00,721 --> 00:08:02,999
Oh, bless you.
181
00:08:02,999 --> 00:08:07,556
May our tears, as carriers
of truth, flow ceaselessly.
182
00:08:07,556 --> 00:08:10,524
- Can I get a selfie?
- You better post it. Right?
183
00:08:10,524 --> 00:08:11,939
Okay.
184
00:08:11,939 --> 00:08:14,424
Rowan! Rapido!
185
00:08:15,702 --> 00:08:17,048
Tag B. Welles Health and Beauty
186
00:08:17,048 --> 00:08:18,946
for 10% off
at our onboard store.
187
00:08:45,214 --> 00:08:49,425
Ah! The ship has called to me
like a great spirit beckoning.
188
00:08:49,425 --> 00:08:52,462
May she nestle you securely
in her mighty bosom.
189
00:08:52,462 --> 00:08:53,774
Oh. Ohh!
190
00:08:53,774 --> 00:08:55,569
Everyone, I'd like you to meet
191
00:08:55,569 --> 00:08:57,951
my dear, dear friend,
Vivian Montgomery,
192
00:08:57,951 --> 00:09:00,988
whom you may recognize
if you own a television.
193
00:09:00,988 --> 00:09:03,266
That's right.
Viv is a two-time winner
194
00:09:03,266 --> 00:09:05,165
of "Red-Hot Chef,"
195
00:09:05,165 --> 00:09:08,099
and she will be overseeing
our cuisine this week.
196
00:09:08,099 --> 00:09:10,929
Oh, her liver carpaccio
is to die for!
197
00:09:10,929 --> 00:09:14,208
Personal chef to a bunch
of smoothie drinkers.
198
00:09:14,208 --> 00:09:15,762
Sweet gig.
199
00:09:15,762 --> 00:09:18,558
Coming from a candy striper
on a cruise ship?
200
00:09:19,248 --> 00:09:22,078
Um, Bethany, what's all this?
201
00:09:22,078 --> 00:09:24,598
Oh, did I forget to tell you?
Oops.
202
00:09:24,598 --> 00:09:27,359
Might I wrangle the doctor
for just a squeak?
203
00:09:27,359 --> 00:09:30,190
I just have some
tiny micro details to go over
204
00:09:30,190 --> 00:09:32,710
just for pesky
insurance purposes.
205
00:09:32,710 --> 00:09:35,920
- Wrangle away.
- You're the best.
206
00:09:35,920 --> 00:09:38,094
My lawyers,
the nervous ninnies,
207
00:09:38,094 --> 00:09:40,821
demanded a doctor sign off
on some of my cuisine choices.
208
00:09:40,821 --> 00:09:43,065
You know, liability,
yada yada yada.
209
00:09:43,065 --> 00:09:44,653
You know, I've been
on this incredible diet
210
00:09:44,653 --> 00:09:46,724
for the past six months
and I've never felt better.
211
00:09:46,724 --> 00:09:49,209
Viv, tell him all about it!
212
00:09:49,209 --> 00:09:52,005
It's organ meats,
nature's multivitamin.
213
00:09:52,005 --> 00:09:55,318
They're rich in iron, copper,
vitamins A, B.
214
00:09:55,318 --> 00:09:57,907
Low in cholesterol
and full of protein.
215
00:09:57,907 --> 00:09:59,391
Here. Try it.
216
00:09:59,391 --> 00:10:00,945
This is goat liver.
217
00:10:00,945 --> 00:10:03,603
The flavor is smooth, delicate,
and it's easily digestible.
218
00:10:03,603 --> 00:10:05,432
Are you asking me
to eat that?
219
00:10:05,432 --> 00:10:08,193
- Obviously.
- No.
220
00:10:08,193 --> 00:10:11,265
Raw meat is filled with
bacteria, pathogens, parasites.
221
00:10:11,265 --> 00:10:13,509
Why don't we cook it first?
- No You'll ruin it
222
00:10:13,509 --> 00:10:15,511
That's the food
of our ancestors.
223
00:10:15,511 --> 00:10:18,376
You know, they didn't have
expensive flambé pans
224
00:10:18,376 --> 00:10:21,103
or fancy polyurethane
sous vide bags.
225
00:10:21,103 --> 00:10:22,656
No, they took a raw bite,
226
00:10:22,656 --> 00:10:24,106
they chewed, they swallowed,
and they thrived.
227
00:10:24,106 --> 00:10:25,832
And they lived
to the ripe old age of 22.
228
00:10:25,832 --> 00:10:28,938
You eat sushi, right?
What's the difference?
229
00:10:28,938 --> 00:10:32,286
Come on, Doc.
What are you afraid of?
230
00:10:32,286 --> 00:10:33,771
I'll eat it.
231
00:10:33,771 --> 00:10:35,289
Tristan.
So nice of you to join us.
232
00:10:35,289 --> 00:10:38,327
Sh-- Happy to help.
233
00:10:38,327 --> 00:10:41,019
Wow. That looks...
234
00:10:41,019 --> 00:10:42,814
looks lovely.
235
00:10:43,712 --> 00:10:44,989
- Thank you.
- Mmm.
236
00:10:44,989 --> 00:10:46,887
See? Nothing to be afraid of.
237
00:10:46,887 --> 00:10:49,303
I'm having Vivian
include a special course
238
00:10:49,303 --> 00:10:51,409
with tonight's dinner--
with your go-ahead, Doctor.
239
00:10:51,409 --> 00:10:54,274
I don't see the harm.
What say you, Doc?
240
00:10:55,551 --> 00:10:57,829
Sure, but I want
a member of my team
241
00:10:57,829 --> 00:10:59,520
to oversee
the food-prep process.
242
00:10:59,520 --> 00:11:01,453
I don't want there to be
any cross-contamination.
243
00:11:01,453 --> 00:11:03,248
Tristan, you seem to
have taken a keen interest.
244
00:11:03,248 --> 00:11:06,182
Oh, yeah. Whatever you say.
245
00:11:06,182 --> 00:11:08,322
You hear that?
246
00:11:08,322 --> 00:11:10,083
You're mine.
247
00:11:12,223 --> 00:11:13,707
Dearie me.
248
00:11:18,401 --> 00:11:19,609
How y'all doing?
249
00:11:19,609 --> 00:11:21,922
I'm Judy Riva
the Smoothie Diva,
250
00:11:21,922 --> 00:11:24,925
and I'm joined today
by healer extraordinaire
251
00:11:24,925 --> 00:11:26,202
Agnes Simkin!
252
00:11:27,825 --> 00:11:30,793
Now, organic ingredients
mixed properly--
253
00:11:30,793 --> 00:11:32,622
this is nature's medicine.
- Hm.
254
00:11:32,622 --> 00:11:36,040
So I put all the good stuff
in one powder-- DivaDust.
255
00:11:36,040 --> 00:11:37,973
Now, this is
my proprietary blend
256
00:11:37,973 --> 00:11:42,115
of superfoods, minerals,
and pre- and probiotics.
257
00:11:42,115 --> 00:11:44,082
Hm. What's in it?
She won't tell me.
258
00:11:44,082 --> 00:11:45,083
She never has.
259
00:11:46,153 --> 00:11:47,914
Well, I can't tell you.
260
00:11:47,914 --> 00:11:49,467
If I tell you that, my lawyers
261
00:11:49,467 --> 00:11:51,124
will have you
walk the gangplank.
262
00:11:51,124 --> 00:11:53,367
I have a crazy legal team,
as well. Hm.
263
00:11:53,367 --> 00:11:56,405
What I can tell you
is that this mixture
264
00:11:56,405 --> 00:11:59,063
literally erased
my son's dyslexia.
265
00:11:59,063 --> 00:12:02,860
And for me, it cured a terrible
case of chronic hiccups.
266
00:12:02,860 --> 00:12:05,379
Uh, you know, three years ago,
267
00:12:05,379 --> 00:12:07,347
Judy came to me
and she said, "Eat my dust,"
268
00:12:07,347 --> 00:12:09,314
in that very brash tone of hers.
269
00:12:09,314 --> 00:12:11,731
Um, but I have to say,
I'm so glad that I did, really.
270
00:12:11,731 --> 00:12:14,354
Because I start every morning
with a DivaDust smoothie.
271
00:12:14,354 --> 00:12:16,356
And I know it's hard
to tell in this tunic,
272
00:12:16,356 --> 00:12:17,840
but I'm quite thin.
273
00:12:17,840 --> 00:12:20,049
So the proof is in the pudding,
as they say.
274
00:12:20,049 --> 00:12:22,465
Yes. The proof is in the dust.
275
00:12:23,604 --> 00:12:25,365
I have, along with DivaDust,
276
00:12:25,365 --> 00:12:27,332
a couple of
incredible ingredients
277
00:12:27,332 --> 00:12:29,783
which are not even legal
in the U.S.
278
00:12:29,783 --> 00:12:32,786
- Ooh.
- Um, including bitter almonds.
279
00:12:32,786 --> 00:12:34,650
These guys have
twice the nutrients
280
00:12:34,650 --> 00:12:36,514
and way more flavor
281
00:12:36,514 --> 00:12:39,655
than the regular old ones
at the supermarket.
282
00:12:49,216 --> 00:12:51,011
Excuse me.
Can we get a picture with you?
283
00:12:51,011 --> 00:12:53,013
Oh. Of course, my loves.
284
00:12:54,808 --> 00:12:57,915
Uh, Miss Simkin?
Hi. Um, I'm Avery.
285
00:12:57,915 --> 00:12:59,640
I'm a nurse here on the Odyssey,
286
00:12:59,640 --> 00:13:03,403
and I just wanted to say
I'm a huge fan.
287
00:13:03,403 --> 00:13:06,233
It's a shame to see such
a young and promising woman
288
00:13:06,233 --> 00:13:08,097
working for the enemy.
289
00:13:08,857 --> 00:13:10,548
Hm. Big Pharma?
290
00:13:10,548 --> 00:13:12,412
The sickness industrial complex?
291
00:13:12,412 --> 00:13:14,655
Doctors and nurses,
like yourself,
292
00:13:14,655 --> 00:13:17,175
have a vested interest
in keeping people sick.
293
00:13:17,175 --> 00:13:19,833
True wellness comes from within,
not without.
294
00:13:19,833 --> 00:13:23,941
Um, I-I don't-- I don't think
that's fair at all, actually.
295
00:13:23,941 --> 00:13:28,186
I-I swore an oath to help people
296
00:13:28,186 --> 00:13:30,568
that I take very seriously.
297
00:13:30,568 --> 00:13:32,156
A-Are you--
298
00:13:32,156 --> 00:13:34,468
Uh, are you okay?
299
00:13:34,468 --> 00:13:35,884
Huh.
300
00:13:35,884 --> 00:13:37,782
I'm fine, sweetie.
I'm an empath.
301
00:13:37,782 --> 00:13:40,612
I probably picked up
on a rogue emotion of yours.
302
00:13:40,612 --> 00:13:41,890
Perhaps guilt.
303
00:13:44,616 --> 00:13:46,653
Miss Simkin?
304
00:13:46,653 --> 00:13:50,588
1027 on the pool deck.
We need a stretcher, stat!
305
00:13:50,588 --> 00:13:52,693
What the hell
was in that smoothie?
306
00:13:56,905 --> 00:13:58,492
Let's get her cuffed up.
307
00:13:58,492 --> 00:13:59,769
No-- No tech.
I'm tech-adverse.
308
00:13:59,769 --> 00:14:00,978
No. Get it off.
309
00:14:04,050 --> 00:14:05,810
Prep 5 grams of
hydroxocobalamin.
310
00:14:05,810 --> 00:14:07,294
Poisoned by bitter almonds?
311
00:14:07,294 --> 00:14:08,882
T-That's impossible!
They're organic.
312
00:14:08,882 --> 00:14:10,573
Yeah. So is arsenic.
313
00:14:10,573 --> 00:14:11,885
Bitter almonds
contain amygdalin,
314
00:14:11,885 --> 00:14:13,473
which breaks down
into hydrogen cyanide
315
00:14:13,473 --> 00:14:14,646
when ingested in high doses.
316
00:14:14,646 --> 00:14:16,752
Be ready to initiate
ACLS procedures.
317
00:14:16,752 --> 00:14:19,030
If I'm gonna be subjected
to this Western medical torture,
318
00:14:19,030 --> 00:14:20,342
I at least need
to be able to breathe!
319
00:14:20,342 --> 00:14:21,861
I'm gonna get you
some oxygen right now.
320
00:14:21,861 --> 00:14:25,243
No, no, sweetie, no.
Allow my-- my body to breathe.
321
00:14:29,178 --> 00:14:30,524
Doctor...
322
00:14:31,905 --> 00:14:33,596
Spider angiomas.
323
00:14:38,429 --> 00:14:39,982
Avery, this isn't
cyanide poisoning.
324
00:14:39,982 --> 00:14:41,156
It's not the almonds.
325
00:14:41,156 --> 00:14:43,434
Well, I hate to say
I told you so.
326
00:14:43,434 --> 00:14:45,022
What else
is in those smoothies?
327
00:14:45,022 --> 00:14:47,783
I can't tell you that.
That's-- That's proprietary.
328
00:14:47,783 --> 00:14:50,924
I mean, that's like telling you
the recipe for Coca-Cola.
329
00:14:50,924 --> 00:14:52,270
She's seizing!
330
00:14:52,270 --> 00:14:55,239
Let's get her oxygen now!
331
00:14:55,239 --> 00:14:56,965
It's just a thickener!
332
00:14:56,965 --> 00:14:59,657
Ashwagandha root.
B complex vitamins.
333
00:14:59,657 --> 00:15:02,418
A Tara powder base.
- Tara powder?
334
00:15:03,972 --> 00:15:06,181
Prep for emergency dialysis now.
335
00:15:17,433 --> 00:15:20,540
Prep the machine. We're aiming
for a bicarbonate dialysate.
336
00:15:20,540 --> 00:15:22,887
Start at a flow rate
of 300 milliliters a minute.
337
00:15:22,887 --> 00:15:23,957
Got it.
338
00:15:23,957 --> 00:15:26,408
Monitoring for
disequilibrium syndrome.
339
00:15:27,892 --> 00:15:29,963
Tara powder.
How did you know what that was?
340
00:15:29,963 --> 00:15:32,000
When I was working for
Doctors Without Borders in Peru,
341
00:15:32,000 --> 00:15:33,725
we would get cases of kids
who were accidentally eating
342
00:15:33,725 --> 00:15:35,244
the seed pods
from the tara tree,
343
00:15:35,244 --> 00:15:37,867
which is toxic to the liver,
and they also bind to proteins,
344
00:15:37,867 --> 00:15:39,731
making it impossible
for the body to absorb them.
345
00:15:39,731 --> 00:15:42,044
She'll be fine in a few days.
- Explains why people who drink
346
00:15:42,044 --> 00:15:43,943
the smoothies feel full
but still lose weight.
347
00:15:43,943 --> 00:15:46,290
They're developing
malnutrition. Nice.
348
00:15:47,912 --> 00:15:49,776
- Hey, gents.
- Captain.
349
00:15:49,776 --> 00:15:51,157
Say what you will about her,
350
00:15:51,157 --> 00:15:53,504
Bethany Welles puts together
a hell of a gift bag.
351
00:15:53,504 --> 00:15:54,988
Care for a saltwater taffy
352
00:15:54,988 --> 00:15:57,197
made with Indian Ocean
saltwater?
353
00:15:57,197 --> 00:15:59,337
Munroe,
when I was 18 years old,
354
00:15:59,337 --> 00:16:02,375
I worked a clam trawler
out of Atlantic City,
355
00:16:02,375 --> 00:16:05,136
and ever since then,
that taffy tastes like
356
00:16:05,136 --> 00:16:06,862
broken heart
and permanent sunburn.
357
00:16:08,381 --> 00:16:10,383
Tell me about
this tropical depression.
358
00:16:10,383 --> 00:16:11,832
She's taking the usual route
up the coast--
359
00:16:11,832 --> 00:16:13,489
northwest to west-northwest.
360
00:16:13,489 --> 00:16:15,871
If we stay the course,
we should only encounter
the outer bands.
361
00:16:15,871 --> 00:16:17,769
Shouldn't get much choppier
than this.
362
00:16:17,769 --> 00:16:19,944
Alright. Good.
I'm still gonna want
363
00:16:19,944 --> 00:16:22,291
some up-to-minute reports from
the National Hurricane Center.
364
00:16:22,291 --> 00:16:23,913
Give me some
bridge-to-bridge comms
365
00:16:23,913 --> 00:16:27,262
and forecasting models
from OWS and GFS.
366
00:16:27,262 --> 00:16:29,850
Anything changes, we'll just
turn this puppy around
367
00:16:29,850 --> 00:16:31,921
and make port in Baja.
368
00:16:31,921 --> 00:16:35,063
Meanwhile, let's smooth
this damn ride out.
369
00:16:35,063 --> 00:16:36,892
Sir.
370
00:16:36,892 --> 00:16:39,412
Bridge to Control Room.
Activate stabilizers.
371
00:16:39,412 --> 00:16:42,587
Control Room copies.
Activating stabilization system.
372
00:16:48,697 --> 00:16:52,045
Folks, this is your captain
coming to you from the bridge.
373
00:16:52,045 --> 00:16:55,531
Now, out on the ocean,
as in life, it's not a question
374
00:16:55,531 --> 00:16:57,637
of when you're gonna
encounter waves.
375
00:16:57,637 --> 00:17:00,640
It's, what do you do
when they come up?
376
00:17:00,640 --> 00:17:02,607
And here on the Odyssey,
377
00:17:02,607 --> 00:17:05,748
when the waves
come a-rockin'...
378
00:17:05,748 --> 00:17:09,752
we start rockin' and rollin'.
379
00:17:09,752 --> 00:17:11,409
Boom.
380
00:17:18,071 --> 00:17:19,659
- Not so much.
- Yes, Chef.
381
00:17:19,659 --> 00:17:21,109
Hmm.
382
00:17:24,940 --> 00:17:27,080
You call that a julienne?
383
00:17:27,080 --> 00:17:28,185
♪ Riders on the storm
384
00:17:28,185 --> 00:17:29,531
I call that a carrot.
385
00:17:31,912 --> 00:17:34,225
♪ Riders on the storm
386
00:17:34,225 --> 00:17:37,677
Well...
you're hopeless.
387
00:17:37,677 --> 00:17:39,748
I really am.
388
00:17:40,921 --> 00:17:43,786
♪ Into this world,
we're thrown ♪
389
00:17:45,374 --> 00:17:47,790
♪ Like a dog
without a bone ♪
390
00:17:47,790 --> 00:17:50,862
♪ An actor out on loan
- Back to work!
391
00:17:50,862 --> 00:17:53,589
♪ Riders on the storm
392
00:17:53,589 --> 00:17:55,281
Yes, Chef.
393
00:18:08,984 --> 00:18:10,434
Hey, Bethany.
Is everything okay?
394
00:18:10,434 --> 00:18:12,194
Absolutely not!
395
00:18:12,194 --> 00:18:14,438
My beef hearts
taste like organ meat!
396
00:18:14,438 --> 00:18:16,923
Something is off.
397
00:18:16,923 --> 00:18:19,719
I'm so sorry to hear that.
The meat is fresh.
398
00:18:19,719 --> 00:18:22,066
It's emulsified with capers,
shallots, anchovy paste.
399
00:18:22,066 --> 00:18:23,343
It's the same as always.
400
00:18:23,343 --> 00:18:25,345
Listing the ingredients
doesn't help, Viv!
401
00:18:25,345 --> 00:18:26,829
Clearly we made a mistake!
402
00:18:26,829 --> 00:18:28,452
You know,
you're a talented cook,
403
00:18:28,452 --> 00:18:31,938
but it takes a real brilliant
chef to work at this scale.
404
00:18:31,938 --> 00:18:34,216
Alright? Just get rid of it.
Take it away.
405
00:18:34,216 --> 00:18:36,218
And do that thing I like
with the Spam and the mozzarella
406
00:18:36,218 --> 00:18:37,978
and mix it up
so it looks like tartare.
407
00:18:37,978 --> 00:18:41,361
Okay? Can you do that?!
That's cooking 101!
408
00:18:41,361 --> 00:18:43,018
- Of course.
- Thank you.
409
00:18:52,545 --> 00:18:53,856
What?
410
00:18:53,856 --> 00:18:54,961
We're friends.
411
00:18:54,961 --> 00:18:57,377
You're "friends"?
412
00:18:57,377 --> 00:18:59,828
I thought you were
trying to not do this.
413
00:18:59,828 --> 00:19:01,209
- Do what?
- I support
414
00:19:01,209 --> 00:19:02,934
whatever you're doing
or not doing.
415
00:19:02,934 --> 00:19:05,937
She's talented, successful.
Maybe this thing has legs.
416
00:19:05,937 --> 00:19:08,457
It's got legs. Long ones.
417
00:19:08,457 --> 00:19:10,735
Her food is awful.
I can't eat this.
418
00:19:10,735 --> 00:19:12,875
For whatever it's worth,
my liver mousse is really tasty.
419
00:19:12,875 --> 00:19:14,360
Yeah, well,
it's making me nauseous.
420
00:19:14,360 --> 00:19:16,776
Then go have a Hot Pocket
in your cabin!
421
00:19:16,776 --> 00:19:18,950
You know what? I think I will.
422
00:19:24,197 --> 00:19:26,820
No. Nope.
We're not doing this again.
423
00:19:26,820 --> 00:19:28,167
No more drama in the infirmary.
424
00:19:28,167 --> 00:19:30,341
Go quash whatever that is
right now.
425
00:19:40,420 --> 00:19:43,768
Looks like we're on the other
side of that storm system.
426
00:19:43,768 --> 00:19:45,218
Yeah, maybe.
427
00:19:45,218 --> 00:19:46,323
Hey.
428
00:19:48,014 --> 00:19:49,188
What is your problem?
429
00:19:49,188 --> 00:19:50,706
Are you jealous or something?
430
00:19:50,706 --> 00:19:52,467
Of you and--
431
00:19:52,467 --> 00:19:54,227
No, babe, I'm not jealous.
432
00:19:54,227 --> 00:19:57,334
You rejected me.
433
00:19:58,473 --> 00:20:00,544
And now that I'm moving on
and I've found someone
434
00:20:00,544 --> 00:20:02,960
that I actually like,
it's making you crazy.
435
00:20:03,961 --> 00:20:08,103
What?
She's nice and she's smart.
436
00:20:08,103 --> 00:20:09,484
She's an extremely good cook.
437
00:20:09,484 --> 00:20:11,348
She literally doesn't cook.
That's her whole thing.
438
00:20:11,348 --> 00:20:12,590
She's a talking Cuisinart--
- Hey, guys.
439
00:20:12,590 --> 00:20:14,868
Ah...
440
00:20:14,868 --> 00:20:17,802
Ah, imagine coming out
onto the deck...
441
00:20:17,802 --> 00:20:20,702
only to find people
talking about you.
442
00:20:20,702 --> 00:20:22,082
Not cool.
443
00:20:22,082 --> 00:20:24,084
I'm going to bed. I feel sick.
444
00:20:24,084 --> 00:20:26,328
Have a bit too much
Zinfandel?
445
00:20:26,328 --> 00:20:27,743
No, actually. I had a lot
of whatever you made tonight.
446
00:20:27,743 --> 00:20:30,367
Hey. Cut it out.
Knock it off over there.
447
00:20:30,367 --> 00:20:32,300
We got bigger fish to fry.
448
00:20:32,300 --> 00:20:34,543
We're not on the other side
of this storm.
449
00:20:34,543 --> 00:20:36,165
We're in the eye of it.
450
00:20:36,165 --> 00:20:38,375
Damn thing must have
built up around us.
451
00:20:38,375 --> 00:20:40,825
Brandon, give me your walkie.
452
00:20:46,245 --> 00:20:47,660
Captain Massey to the bridge.
453
00:20:47,660 --> 00:20:50,110
Munroe, what's it look like
on the Doppler?
454
00:20:53,148 --> 00:20:55,909
First Officer Munroe, come in.
455
00:20:57,014 --> 00:20:59,119
First officer Munroe, come in.
456
00:21:13,617 --> 00:21:15,584
Psilocybin.
457
00:21:15,584 --> 00:21:18,173
Ohh. Beautiful.
458
00:21:19,864 --> 00:21:22,764
What--
What's going on, Cap?
459
00:21:22,764 --> 00:21:24,904
Well, Munroe, what's going on
460
00:21:24,904 --> 00:21:28,390
is you're higher than
Snoop D-O Double G...
461
00:21:28,390 --> 00:21:30,150
and we're in the middle
of a hurricane,
462
00:21:30,150 --> 00:21:31,393
maybe one of the worst
463
00:21:31,393 --> 00:21:33,602
I've ever seen
in this part of the Pacific.
464
00:21:33,602 --> 00:21:34,879
High?
465
00:21:34,879 --> 00:21:36,950
- Yeah.
- I'm high? What?
466
00:21:36,950 --> 00:21:39,194
Yeah. You're alright.
467
00:21:39,194 --> 00:21:40,920
You didn't get into that,
did you?
468
00:21:40,920 --> 00:21:42,266
No, sir.
469
00:21:42,266 --> 00:21:43,854
That's one in a row.
470
00:21:43,854 --> 00:21:45,304
Hmm...
471
00:21:48,721 --> 00:21:50,378
Folks, this is your captain
472
00:21:50,378 --> 00:21:52,828
calling from the bridge deck
with an update.
473
00:21:54,623 --> 00:21:57,143
Well, it appears that
Mother Nature has decided
474
00:21:57,143 --> 00:21:59,456
to come along for the ride
this week.
475
00:21:59,456 --> 00:22:01,354
As calm as it may seem
right now,
476
00:22:01,354 --> 00:22:05,841
we are actually
in the eye of a hurricane.
477
00:22:05,841 --> 00:22:08,913
The worst of the storm could
hit in a few hours or a day.
478
00:22:08,913 --> 00:22:10,708
Remain calm and await
further announcement.
479
00:22:10,708 --> 00:22:13,159
I told you there was
480
00:22:13,159 --> 00:22:15,161
something wrong with that food!
481
00:22:22,030 --> 00:22:23,790
Avery, you in there?
482
00:22:23,790 --> 00:22:25,274
You okay?
483
00:22:25,274 --> 00:22:27,760
- Ugh.
- I'm not leaving
484
00:22:27,760 --> 00:22:29,589
until I see whatever
ingenious thing
485
00:22:29,589 --> 00:22:32,040
you've fashioned
into a barf bucket.
486
00:22:40,911 --> 00:22:42,775
It's from the nursery.
487
00:22:44,190 --> 00:22:46,330
It's for sandcastles.
488
00:22:46,330 --> 00:22:47,918
Not anymore.
489
00:22:47,918 --> 00:22:50,127
Okay. Infirmary.
Come on. Let's go.
490
00:22:50,127 --> 00:22:52,923
I have food poisoning.
Just let me cocoon in privacy.
491
00:22:52,923 --> 00:22:54,649
How do you know
it's food poisoning?
492
00:22:54,649 --> 00:22:57,859
Oh, because I am
a very good nurse, Maxwell.
493
00:22:57,859 --> 00:22:59,964
Abdominal pain, vomiting, and,
494
00:22:59,964 --> 00:23:02,657
oh, yeah, eating
a plateful of raw meat.
495
00:23:02,657 --> 00:23:04,762
Is it a broad pain
or a sharp, persistent pain?
496
00:23:04,762 --> 00:23:06,902
You are a sharp,
persistent pain.
497
00:23:06,902 --> 00:23:09,215
We don't self-diagnose.
498
00:23:09,215 --> 00:23:11,217
Them's the rules.
Infirmary! Come on!
499
00:23:11,217 --> 00:23:12,908
No. I can hardly stand.
500
00:23:12,908 --> 00:23:15,877
How do you expect me
to walk to the infirmary?
501
00:23:20,571 --> 00:23:21,641
No.
502
00:23:23,471 --> 00:23:27,716
Purify the space!
To create a better place!
503
00:23:27,716 --> 00:23:30,892
Purify the space!
Put it on your face!
504
00:23:32,272 --> 00:23:35,414
I leave for five minut--
Are you burning sage?!
505
00:23:35,414 --> 00:23:37,657
Create a better place!
Purify the space!
506
00:23:37,657 --> 00:23:40,419
Create a better place!
Purify the space!
507
00:23:40,419 --> 00:23:42,041
- Hey, Tristan.
- Yeah?
508
00:23:42,041 --> 00:23:43,594
You call that in to the bridge,
make sure they know
509
00:23:43,594 --> 00:23:45,251
there's nothing on fire
down here.
510
00:23:45,251 --> 00:23:46,873
Way ahead of you.
She showed up and started
511
00:23:46,873 --> 00:23:48,841
babbling about healing rituals.
512
00:23:48,841 --> 00:23:50,463
Need a hand over here
with Avery.
513
00:23:50,463 --> 00:23:52,638
I need her vitals
and put her on--
- 500-mil saline bag.
514
00:23:52,638 --> 00:23:54,260
4 milligrams ondansetron
for nausea?
515
00:23:54,260 --> 00:23:55,675
- My guy. And for pain?
- Ozone.
516
00:23:55,675 --> 00:23:57,159
No, I was gonna
say Toradol, but...
517
00:23:57,159 --> 00:23:59,438
No. She's inhaling the ozone.
518
00:23:59,438 --> 00:24:01,750
Oh, God! Bethany!
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no!
519
00:24:01,750 --> 00:24:05,236
We do not inhale the ozone.
That's toxic.
520
00:24:05,236 --> 00:24:06,755
Okay. Hi, Bethany. Hi. Hi. Hi.
521
00:24:06,755 --> 00:24:08,447
I'm gonna need
to take your vitals. Okay?
522
00:24:08,447 --> 00:24:10,966
- Mm-hmm.
- Stick with me for one sec.
523
00:24:10,966 --> 00:24:12,623
- I can do this.
- Dr. Odyssey!
524
00:24:12,623 --> 00:24:13,762
- Hey, Tristan.
- Yeah?
525
00:24:13,762 --> 00:24:15,039
I need a CBC
and a tox screen.
526
00:24:15,039 --> 00:24:16,247
I think she might have
ingested something.
527
00:24:16,247 --> 00:24:17,766
Yeah, a spoonful
of bath salts maybe?
528
00:24:17,766 --> 00:24:20,044
Also prep some Ativan.
We're gonna do a grab-and-stab.
529
00:24:20,044 --> 00:24:21,667
- Grab-and-stab.
- Hi, Bethany. Hi. Hi.
530
00:24:21,667 --> 00:24:25,394
How you doing? Deep breaths.
One breath. Two breath.
531
00:24:25,394 --> 00:24:27,293
Three deep--
Three deep breaths.
532
00:24:27,293 --> 00:24:29,606
Sleep well, B. Welles.
533
00:24:31,987 --> 00:24:34,680
Let's get her in some straps,
just in case.
534
00:24:42,550 --> 00:24:44,483
We're back with you.
535
00:24:44,483 --> 00:24:46,830
Alright. What happens when
you palpate your right side?
536
00:24:46,830 --> 00:24:49,453
Oww! Rebound pain.
537
00:24:49,453 --> 00:24:51,524
Okay. It's not food poisoning.
538
00:24:51,524 --> 00:24:53,561
It's either, um-- It's kidney
stones, diverticulitis...
539
00:24:53,561 --> 00:24:56,391
- Or appendicitis.
- Appendicitis?
540
00:24:56,391 --> 00:24:58,186
Do we have time to do tests,
a CT scan?
541
00:24:58,186 --> 00:24:59,325
No, but we don't need to.
542
00:24:59,325 --> 00:25:00,809
Are you familiar
with RPO procedure?
543
00:25:00,809 --> 00:25:02,086
- Nuh-unh.
- There are three checks.
544
00:25:02,086 --> 00:25:03,605
One, pain in the
lower-right quadrant.
545
00:25:03,605 --> 00:25:04,813
You've already exhibited that.
546
00:25:04,813 --> 00:25:06,919
Two pain when
the right leg is flexed.
547
00:25:06,919 --> 00:25:08,334
Check.
548
00:25:08,334 --> 00:25:10,301
Three, pain when the hip
is put into interior rotation.
549
00:25:10,301 --> 00:25:12,614
Ow! Check, check, check!
Ding, ding, ding!
550
00:25:12,614 --> 00:25:15,099
Max, I think you're
gonna have to operate.
551
00:25:15,099 --> 00:25:16,549
Ooh! It feels like
it's gonna rupture!
552
00:25:16,549 --> 00:25:18,275
Yeah, I told you. I told you.
553
00:25:18,275 --> 00:25:19,587
I told you it wasn't
food poisoning.
554
00:25:19,587 --> 00:25:21,589
Why won't you
listen to me, Aves?!
555
00:25:23,487 --> 00:25:26,766
All guests,
please return to your cabins.
556
00:25:26,766 --> 00:25:29,976
All guests,
please return to your cabins.
557
00:25:36,707 --> 00:25:39,572
Well, we've outrun her
about as long as we can.
558
00:25:41,091 --> 00:25:44,853
Rosie, set speed to 120 RPMs.
559
00:25:44,853 --> 00:25:49,651
Helmsman, adjust your heading
to 045 degrees.
560
00:25:49,651 --> 00:25:51,619
Set condition Zebra.
561
00:25:51,619 --> 00:25:54,449
All hands,
prepare for heavy weather.
562
00:25:54,449 --> 00:25:56,002
Secure all openings.
563
00:25:56,002 --> 00:25:58,315
I want this ship
drier than Rosie's stories
564
00:25:58,315 --> 00:26:00,179
about growing up
in Dowagiac.
565
00:26:00,179 --> 00:26:03,631
Roger that. But you live
for my stories, Cap! Don't lie!
566
00:26:03,631 --> 00:26:05,080
Engage heeling pumps
on starboard
567
00:26:05,080 --> 00:26:07,082
to counteract portside list.
568
00:26:07,082 --> 00:26:09,395
Good idea, Tim Leary.
Did you get that, Rosie?
569
00:26:09,395 --> 00:26:11,777
Heard it and on it.
570
00:26:14,434 --> 00:26:17,645
Folks, this is the Captain
coming from the bridge deck.
571
00:26:17,645 --> 00:26:19,232
Well--
572
00:26:19,232 --> 00:26:21,718
It's a funny thing about
being surrounded on all sides.
573
00:26:21,718 --> 00:26:23,547
The only way out is through.
574
00:26:23,547 --> 00:26:26,412
Go to your cabins,
secure your belongings,
575
00:26:26,412 --> 00:26:28,552
and brace for rough water.
576
00:26:28,552 --> 00:26:31,555
Infirmary to Bridge.
Captain, you there?
577
00:26:34,385 --> 00:26:36,629
Yeah, Max. What do you need?
578
00:26:36,629 --> 00:26:38,320
Honestly, I need a miracle.
579
00:26:38,320 --> 00:26:40,219
It's Avery.
Her appendix is about to burst.
580
00:26:40,219 --> 00:26:41,634
We need to do emergency surgery.
581
00:26:41,634 --> 00:26:44,119
I need 20 minutes
of calm waters.
582
00:26:46,570 --> 00:26:48,848
Is that 20 consecutive minutes?
583
00:26:48,848 --> 00:26:50,470
I'll take 'em
how I can get 'em.
584
00:26:50,470 --> 00:26:52,093
Alright. Stay calm.
585
00:26:52,093 --> 00:26:53,853
Avery's in good hands
with you and Tristan,
586
00:26:53,853 --> 00:26:55,924
and you're in good hands with
me and the bridge crew up here.
587
00:26:55,924 --> 00:26:57,650
I'm gonna get you
that 20 minutes,
588
00:26:57,650 --> 00:26:59,652
but it's not gonna be
all at once.
589
00:26:59,652 --> 00:27:02,379
It's gonna take the
better part of the next hour.
590
00:27:02,379 --> 00:27:05,865
I got an idea.
It's an old seamen's maneuver.
591
00:27:05,865 --> 00:27:08,247
It violates
about 50 nautical laws...
592
00:27:08,247 --> 00:27:10,318
but we'll deal with that later.
593
00:27:10,318 --> 00:27:12,182
The only thing you have to do
is stay calm
594
00:27:12,182 --> 00:27:14,667
and follow my instructions
to the letter.
595
00:27:14,667 --> 00:27:16,289
Can you do it?
596
00:27:16,289 --> 00:27:18,015
Yes, sir. We can do it.
597
00:27:23,434 --> 00:27:24,608
Alright.
598
00:27:24,608 --> 00:27:26,886
This is how
"trough riding" works.
599
00:27:26,886 --> 00:27:30,269
We're gonna navigate this storm
in a big zig-zag pattern.
600
00:27:30,269 --> 00:27:32,961
I'm gonna position the ship
in the trough of a wave,
601
00:27:32,961 --> 00:27:35,688
and that should carry us along
for a couple minutes.
602
00:27:35,688 --> 00:27:38,967
When we absolutely have to,
I'll give warning
603
00:27:38,967 --> 00:27:41,867
and we'll make a hard
90-degree turn,
604
00:27:41,867 --> 00:27:43,938
thrust through the wave
and into the next trough,
605
00:27:43,938 --> 00:27:45,698
which should buy us
a couple more minutes.
606
00:27:45,698 --> 00:27:47,769
So instead of steady rocking,
we'll have moments of calm
607
00:27:47,769 --> 00:27:50,634
followed by "Whoa, mama,
hang on to your hat!"
608
00:27:50,634 --> 00:27:53,430
That's exactly right, Rosie.
609
00:27:53,430 --> 00:27:57,158
Guys, the life of one of our own
is on the line down there.
610
00:27:57,158 --> 00:27:58,953
The only way this works
is if we stay
611
00:27:58,953 --> 00:28:01,749
in constant contact
and communication. Copy?
612
00:28:01,749 --> 00:28:03,612
- Yes, sir.
- Copy that.
613
00:28:09,170 --> 00:28:10,896
How am I supposed
to pull this off, huh?
614
00:28:10,896 --> 00:28:12,621
Without you bossing me around?
615
00:28:12,621 --> 00:28:14,071
Just remember--
if you kill me,
616
00:28:14,071 --> 00:28:15,901
my ghost is gonna come
crop-dust you
617
00:28:15,901 --> 00:28:17,730
every time
you're alone with a girl.
618
00:28:29,190 --> 00:28:31,295
Intubating now.
619
00:28:31,295 --> 00:28:34,505
Alright, team.
We're entering the first trough.
620
00:28:36,231 --> 00:28:38,889
Cutting along
the McBurney line now.
621
00:28:38,889 --> 00:28:40,442
Access.
622
00:28:46,655 --> 00:28:49,520
Locating the appendix.
623
00:28:49,520 --> 00:28:50,763
Got it.
624
00:28:50,763 --> 00:28:52,869
Time's up!
I gotta make the turn!
625
00:28:54,491 --> 00:28:55,941
One sec, Cap!
626
00:28:55,941 --> 00:28:57,805
Don't have it. Brace now.
627
00:29:05,088 --> 00:29:08,125
Watch it. If those hit
the ground, they're useless.
628
00:29:15,857 --> 00:29:17,686
Yeah. There it is. I got it.
629
00:29:20,586 --> 00:29:21,690
Clamp.
630
00:29:25,660 --> 00:29:26,695
Clamp.
631
00:29:35,739 --> 00:29:38,328
Brace for impact. Brace!
632
00:29:43,264 --> 00:29:46,854
Sir, the wind. It's changing
direction on us.
633
00:29:46,854 --> 00:29:49,028
We got a rogue wave coming.
634
00:29:49,028 --> 00:29:51,134
Get ready. Brace yourself now!
635
00:30:02,145 --> 00:30:04,561
Ligatures are loose.
I got uncontrolled bleeding.
636
00:30:04,561 --> 00:30:06,805
I need visualization, stat.
637
00:30:17,125 --> 00:30:18,644
Yeah. We're good.
638
00:30:20,232 --> 00:30:22,165
We're okay, Cap.
We lost you there.
639
00:30:22,165 --> 00:30:24,581
But we're okay.
All three of us.
640
00:30:24,581 --> 00:30:26,410
Well, I'm glad to hear it.
641
00:30:26,410 --> 00:30:29,206
It's not over yet, but I think
we're through the worst of it.
642
00:30:36,489 --> 00:30:38,008
It's still too shaky.
643
00:30:38,008 --> 00:30:39,734
I can't get the sutures
to stick.
644
00:30:39,734 --> 00:30:41,218
Can I?
645
00:30:49,986 --> 00:30:51,539
Got it.
646
00:30:52,057 --> 00:30:55,992
We call this
the "cruise ship knot."
647
00:30:55,992 --> 00:30:58,442
It's the same
as a square knot,
648
00:30:58,442 --> 00:31:00,893
but you double the back loops.
649
00:31:00,893 --> 00:31:02,861
You see?
650
00:31:02,861 --> 00:31:04,690
Scissors.
651
00:31:04,690 --> 00:31:08,245
That's actually... very smart.
652
00:31:08,245 --> 00:31:10,316
Well...
653
00:31:10,316 --> 00:31:12,491
I do know some things, Doc.
654
00:31:17,151 --> 00:31:19,360
- Whoo!
- Yes.
655
00:31:19,360 --> 00:31:22,915
Yeah, baby! That was fun!
Wanna do it again?
656
00:31:22,915 --> 00:31:26,160
Whoo! That's what
I'm talking about, baby!
657
00:31:34,271 --> 00:31:36,618
Hey, Tristan...
658
00:31:36,618 --> 00:31:38,620
You know a lot more
than some things.
659
00:31:38,620 --> 00:31:41,175
That was incredible work.
660
00:31:41,175 --> 00:31:43,902
I wouldn't have wanted
anybody else in there with me.
661
00:32:00,435 --> 00:32:02,023
Her blood pressure's dropping.
Heartbeat's irregular.
662
00:32:02,023 --> 00:32:04,336
Looks like she vomited
during the storm.
663
00:32:04,336 --> 00:32:05,406
Let's get her on her side
so she doesn't aspirate.
664
00:32:05,406 --> 00:32:08,029
- Yeah.
- Ready? One. Two. Three.
665
00:32:08,029 --> 00:32:09,582
Do you think it's drugs?
666
00:32:09,582 --> 00:32:11,446
Hallucinogenic therapy?
667
00:32:11,446 --> 00:32:13,862
I'm not so sure.
Look at her wrists. Swelling.
668
00:32:13,862 --> 00:32:15,899
Yellowing of the fingernails.
669
00:32:15,899 --> 00:32:18,177
Jaundice.
Something to do with her liver.
670
00:32:21,801 --> 00:32:23,148
Oh.
671
00:32:24,080 --> 00:32:26,392
Such negative auras.
672
00:32:26,392 --> 00:32:27,842
Ugh.
673
00:32:29,740 --> 00:32:31,604
That's what she said to me
when we first met.
674
00:32:31,604 --> 00:32:33,986
I had a "crimson aura."
675
00:32:36,264 --> 00:32:37,817
Bingo.
676
00:32:37,817 --> 00:32:39,371
Kayser-Fleischer rings.
677
00:32:39,371 --> 00:32:42,615
- Uh, w-what?
- It's copper poisoning.
678
00:32:42,615 --> 00:32:44,997
Y-You see the rust-colored rings
around her Iris?
679
00:32:44,997 --> 00:32:46,447
- Mm-hmm.
- That's why she's seeing auras.
680
00:32:46,447 --> 00:32:47,966
Her vision's clouded.
It also explains
681
00:32:47,966 --> 00:32:50,796
the neurological symptoms
and the ataxia.
682
00:32:50,796 --> 00:32:53,730
Organ meat-- extremely high
in heavy metals.
683
00:32:53,730 --> 00:32:56,560
And liver is high in copper.
She needs chelation therapy.
684
00:32:56,560 --> 00:32:57,941
We need to detox her system.
685
00:32:57,941 --> 00:32:59,563
Let's get her on an I.V.
of penicillamine.
686
00:32:59,563 --> 00:33:01,013
- Yeah.
- Ondansetron for nausea.
687
00:33:01,013 --> 00:33:02,704
Also let's put her
on a normal saline bolus
688
00:33:02,704 --> 00:33:04,913
just to flush out her system.
- I got it.
689
00:33:22,379 --> 00:33:25,037
Hmm.
690
00:33:25,037 --> 00:33:28,178
Energy meridians run
like streams through the body.
691
00:33:28,178 --> 00:33:31,388
Strong emotions muddy
the waters, pollute the soul.
692
00:33:31,388 --> 00:33:34,081
Agnes, are you sure
you're ready to do this?
693
00:33:34,081 --> 00:33:36,324
I mean, I thought I killed you.
694
00:33:36,324 --> 00:33:38,809
Sweetie, it's gonna take
more than a smoothie
to get rid of me.
695
00:33:38,809 --> 00:33:40,259
Hm!
696
00:33:40,259 --> 00:33:43,262
I'm closing up shop.
I've blended my last bebida.
697
00:33:43,262 --> 00:33:45,678
Judy, sweetie, you're a healer,
for Goddess' sake.
698
00:33:45,678 --> 00:33:47,749
You can't quit that easy.
699
00:33:47,749 --> 00:33:49,165
Did I ever tell you
about that pro golfer
700
00:33:49,165 --> 00:33:50,649
whose shoulder I was working on?
701
00:33:50,649 --> 00:33:52,444
I can't say who he is,
of course,
702
00:33:52,444 --> 00:33:54,963
but let's just say
he was a real "big cat"
703
00:33:54,963 --> 00:33:55,964
if you catch my drift.
704
00:33:55,964 --> 00:33:57,173
It was Tiger Woods. Yeah.
705
00:33:57,173 --> 00:33:59,761
I was tapping his Yunmen,
the cloud gate,
706
00:33:59,761 --> 00:34:01,418
but I was a millimeter off.
707
00:34:01,418 --> 00:34:03,317
He lost sensation
in his whole arm
708
00:34:03,317 --> 00:34:05,181
a week before the Masters.
709
00:34:05,181 --> 00:34:08,218
Gradually over the next
six days, sensation returned.
710
00:34:08,218 --> 00:34:10,876
And that weekend,
he shot 18 below par,
711
00:34:10,876 --> 00:34:14,224
took home the Green Jacket.
712
00:34:14,224 --> 00:34:17,745
It's amazing what miracles
can happen with catastrophe.
713
00:34:17,745 --> 00:34:21,611
Huh. I'm sensing
a real imbalance right
here in your Tianliao.
714
00:34:22,750 --> 00:34:24,579
Yeah. Inhale deeply for me.
715
00:34:28,790 --> 00:34:31,103
Ooh.
That one felt kind of funny.
716
00:34:31,103 --> 00:34:34,002
Oh, yeah. That's toxicity
leaving the body.
717
00:34:34,002 --> 00:34:37,351
Now exhale all that negativity.
718
00:34:46,705 --> 00:34:48,500
Judy, does it hurt
when you breathe?
719
00:34:48,500 --> 00:34:50,881
- Yes.
- Her lips are turning blue.
720
00:34:50,881 --> 00:34:53,263
Central cyanosis.
O2 SATS are at 88%.
721
00:34:53,263 --> 00:34:55,127
She needs oxygen.
- How long are these needles?
722
00:34:55,127 --> 00:34:58,061
Uh, they range. The black
ones are 100 millimeters.
723
00:34:58,061 --> 00:35:00,339
100 millimeters?
724
00:35:00,339 --> 00:35:03,687
The intrapleural space
is 25 millimeters,
725
00:35:03,687 --> 00:35:05,448
so what you've done here
is punctured her lung.
726
00:35:05,448 --> 00:35:07,691
Now all the air is rushing
out into her chest cavity
727
00:35:07,691 --> 00:35:09,037
and it's crushing
her heart and lungs.
728
00:35:09,037 --> 00:35:11,454
- O2 SATS are at 70.
- Prep for a thoracostomy.
729
00:35:11,454 --> 00:35:12,938
I'm gonna get
these needles out now.
730
00:35:12,938 --> 00:35:14,284
No! No, no, no!
Are you crazy?!
731
00:35:14,284 --> 00:35:15,665
If you interrupt
her treatment now,
732
00:35:15,665 --> 00:35:17,322
you could permanently alter
her energy pathways!
733
00:35:17,322 --> 00:35:19,565
What she needs is
to breathe through this.
734
00:35:19,565 --> 00:35:21,015
The only way
she's breathing through this
735
00:35:21,015 --> 00:35:22,430
is through a chest tube.
736
00:35:22,430 --> 00:35:25,123
Judy, when I tell you,
I'm gonna need you
737
00:35:25,123 --> 00:35:27,159
to breathe out all the air
in your lungs and hold it.
738
00:35:27,159 --> 00:35:28,195
Okay?
739
00:35:36,306 --> 00:35:38,205
Scalpel.
740
00:35:38,205 --> 00:35:39,378
Ready?
741
00:35:39,378 --> 00:35:40,931
Hm.
742
00:35:40,931 --> 00:35:43,106
Okay. Now.
743
00:35:50,458 --> 00:35:51,735
This is gonna hurt a little.
744
00:36:01,987 --> 00:36:03,575
Drape.
- Okay.
745
00:36:03,575 --> 00:36:05,749
Finish dressing the wound.
Monitor her vitals.
746
00:36:05,749 --> 00:36:07,199
I'm gonna go check on Avery.
- She's fine.
747
00:36:07,199 --> 00:36:08,407
She's better than ever, actually.
748
00:36:08,407 --> 00:36:10,444
She needed this.
She needed this.
749
00:36:20,212 --> 00:36:21,489
You!
750
00:36:21,489 --> 00:36:23,595
Me.
751
00:36:26,218 --> 00:36:31,396
I must say. This is feeling
very "Gift of the Magi."
752
00:36:31,396 --> 00:36:35,952
Is that that story about
the poor husband and wife
753
00:36:35,952 --> 00:36:39,818
who try to buy each other
the perfect Christmas present?
754
00:36:40,715 --> 00:36:43,235
She sells her hair
to buy him a watch chain.
755
00:36:43,235 --> 00:36:46,238
He sells his watch
to buy her a comb.
756
00:36:46,238 --> 00:36:48,551
Two people
with the purest of intentions
757
00:36:48,551 --> 00:36:50,898
ensnared by
the cruelest circumstances.
758
00:36:50,898 --> 00:36:52,555
Are you trying to turn
this into some kind of--
759
00:36:52,555 --> 00:36:53,832
Shh, shh, shh.
Sweetie, sweetie.
760
00:36:53,832 --> 00:36:56,075
I can intuit
what you're thinking.
761
00:36:56,075 --> 00:36:59,217
Okay? And I forgive you.
762
00:36:59,217 --> 00:37:02,289
You nearly killed me,
you carnival-act fraud.
763
00:37:05,223 --> 00:37:08,122
- Stop! Break it up!
- She crossed a boundary!
764
00:37:10,055 --> 00:37:13,265
I am thrilled to announce
the launch of our new product,
765
00:37:13,265 --> 00:37:17,614
B. Welles Detox, a high-quality,
at-home chelation system
766
00:37:17,614 --> 00:37:21,273
that will help remove heavy
toxic metals from our systems.
767
00:37:22,240 --> 00:37:24,034
Pollutants she put there.
768
00:37:25,657 --> 00:37:28,798
Stay super sweet.
Really beautiful dress.
769
00:37:28,798 --> 00:37:31,904
Anyhoozle...
I'm very excited to say
770
00:37:31,904 --> 00:37:35,322
that I'll be partnering with
the fabulous Purdue Pharma.
771
00:37:35,322 --> 00:37:38,117
Can we do another one, Rowan?
772
00:37:39,257 --> 00:37:41,914
I am ending up with
some ceremonial-grade lip balm.
773
00:37:41,914 --> 00:37:43,364
As am I.
774
00:37:43,364 --> 00:37:46,056
- Oh. Big bet.
- Big time.
775
00:37:46,056 --> 00:37:47,782
Wait a minute.
776
00:37:47,782 --> 00:37:50,509
Are you gambling with
precious B. Welles products?
777
00:37:50,509 --> 00:37:52,615
And losing quite badly,
I might add.
778
00:37:52,615 --> 00:37:55,928
I would happily trade all the
serums and balms in the world
779
00:37:55,928 --> 00:37:59,242
to never have to do
a Wellness Week ever again.
780
00:37:59,242 --> 00:38:02,625
Hear, hear. Cap? Please?
No, we can't.
781
00:38:02,625 --> 00:38:05,766
I'm one step ahead
of you whiners. As usual.
782
00:38:05,766 --> 00:38:08,251
I spoke to Lenore this morning.
783
00:38:08,251 --> 00:38:10,874
We are not renewing
with B. Welles.
784
00:38:10,874 --> 00:38:13,429
Didn't hurt that Lenore
had broken out in hives
785
00:38:13,429 --> 00:38:17,295
from one of the sunless tanners
that Bethany had given her.
786
00:38:17,295 --> 00:38:18,848
Well, from now on,
787
00:38:18,848 --> 00:38:21,540
when it comes to wellness,
I'm sticking to the classics.
788
00:38:21,540 --> 00:38:24,336
Eat your veggies,
take the stairs, drink water.
789
00:38:24,336 --> 00:38:25,613
And regular checkups.
790
00:38:25,613 --> 00:38:28,271
And maybe a colonic
here or there.
791
00:38:28,271 --> 00:38:30,273
Hi. Soup.
792
00:38:30,273 --> 00:38:33,172
It's cooked. I promise.
793
00:38:33,172 --> 00:38:35,761
Is this an olive branch?
794
00:38:35,761 --> 00:38:37,970
Uh, well,
it's my chicken cassoulet
795
00:38:37,970 --> 00:38:40,697
with basil oil
and white truffle.
796
00:38:40,697 --> 00:38:44,494
All of that raw-meat stuff,
that was Bethany.
797
00:38:44,494 --> 00:38:46,841
This is more me.
798
00:38:46,841 --> 00:38:48,602
Oh, wow.
799
00:38:48,602 --> 00:38:51,363
That's, um--
That's incredible.
800
00:38:51,363 --> 00:38:53,676
Well, there's more
where that came from.
801
00:38:53,676 --> 00:38:56,989
Uh, reminds me--
Chef Ricamore has, uh,
802
00:38:56,989 --> 00:39:00,303
suddenly made an abrupt
departure from the Odyssey.
803
00:39:00,303 --> 00:39:03,720
Something crazy like a newborn
baby girl or something.
804
00:39:03,720 --> 00:39:06,689
So Vivian has graciously agreed
805
00:39:06,689 --> 00:39:08,829
to stay with us
for the rest of the season.
806
00:39:08,829 --> 00:39:11,452
Oh, wait. You, uh--
You quit your job with Bethany?
807
00:39:11,452 --> 00:39:13,316
Congrats.
- Yeah.
808
00:39:13,316 --> 00:39:16,768
She gave a whole new meaning
to toxic work environment.
809
00:39:16,768 --> 00:39:18,010
- Mm-hmm.
- I'm looking forward to
810
00:39:18,010 --> 00:39:20,116
cooking for people
who are actually sane.
811
00:39:21,876 --> 00:39:24,810
Oh, well, let me know
when you find those people.
812
00:39:26,571 --> 00:39:29,159
Okay. Well, that's my cue.
813
00:39:29,159 --> 00:39:33,060
This week, I give you three
permission to stay below deck
814
00:39:33,060 --> 00:39:36,304
while we manage
the disembarkment.
815
00:39:36,304 --> 00:39:37,478
Come with me?
816
00:39:37,478 --> 00:39:38,824
Yeah. I'll, um--
I'll see you around.
817
00:39:38,824 --> 00:39:39,929
Yeah, yeah. Okay.
818
00:39:39,929 --> 00:39:43,001
I will catch you
on the port side. Ha-ha.
819
00:39:43,001 --> 00:39:44,968
Really, Tristan?
820
00:39:44,968 --> 00:39:46,763
Real talk.
821
00:39:46,763 --> 00:39:48,558
I almost died last night,
didn't I?
822
00:39:48,558 --> 00:39:50,008
What?! No.
823
00:39:50,008 --> 00:39:51,837
Once you were out,
there were hardly any waves.
824
00:39:51,837 --> 00:39:54,875
Honestly. We breezed right
through it. It was simple.
825
00:39:54,875 --> 00:39:58,223
Hmm. Yeah. Okay.
Go on. Get out of here.
826
00:39:58,223 --> 00:39:59,914
You only get two days
before the next cruise.
827
00:39:59,914 --> 00:40:03,193
You don't want to
waste them here.
828
00:40:03,193 --> 00:40:06,680
Roller skating on the boardwalk
or play Whac-A-Mole
829
00:40:06,680 --> 00:40:08,682
or whatever it is you do
in your free time.
What are you doing?
830
00:40:08,682 --> 00:40:10,856
You know, I was never
any good at roller-skating.
831
00:40:10,856 --> 00:40:14,446
I don't play Whac-A-Mole
because of ethical issues.
832
00:40:14,446 --> 00:40:16,966
Animal cruelty.
833
00:40:16,966 --> 00:40:18,381
Now, if you're not
gonna eat that soup,
834
00:40:18,381 --> 00:40:20,279
I have a delicious new recipe.
835
00:40:20,279 --> 00:40:22,523
It's pizza rolls,
but you don't cook them.
836
00:40:22,523 --> 00:40:23,800
You eat them raw.
837
00:40:23,800 --> 00:40:25,492
Yes, we plucked them
from the pepperoni tree,
838
00:40:25,492 --> 00:40:27,010
just like our ancestors used to.
839
00:40:27,010 --> 00:40:30,462
Ah. Idiots.
Both of you.
840
00:40:30,462 --> 00:40:34,155
If I bust these sutures,
you're fixing 'em.
841
00:40:34,155 --> 00:40:36,261
Ugh. Okay. Deal me a hand.
842
00:40:36,261 --> 00:40:37,538
I think I'm getting
the hang of this.
843
00:40:37,538 --> 00:40:39,091
Ceremonial-grade lip balm.
844
00:40:39,091 --> 00:40:40,886
What kind of ceremony
needs lip balm?
845
00:40:40,886 --> 00:40:43,095
Oh, wouldn't you love to know?
846
00:40:44,959 --> 00:40:47,445
Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow!
847
00:40:47,445 --> 00:40:49,377
- Your sutures.
- Ow!
848
00:40:50,965 --> 00:40:52,208
Stop it.
63287
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