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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:48,080 --> 00:00:50,720 Morning, Mr Endleby. 2 00:00:50,760 --> 00:00:52,920 How you do you do? Morning. 3 00:00:54,280 --> 00:00:56,120 Good morning. These are for you. 4 00:00:57,440 --> 00:00:59,680 Good morning. 5 00:00:59,720 --> 00:01:01,560 Morning. 6 00:01:01,600 --> 00:01:02,960 Come on, we're gonna be late. 7 00:01:10,920 --> 00:01:12,360 KNOCK AT DOOR 8 00:01:13,800 --> 00:01:15,800 I'll get it. DOG PANTS 9 00:01:20,880 --> 00:01:22,480 Morning. Parcel for you, Mr Carmody. 10 00:01:22,520 --> 00:01:24,520 Thank you so much. Bye. 11 00:01:27,360 --> 00:01:29,160 DOG BARKS 12 00:01:29,200 --> 00:01:30,920 PARCEL RATTLES 13 00:01:30,960 --> 00:01:33,320 Well, well, Hamish, what have we got here? 14 00:01:33,360 --> 00:01:35,320 Bet you can smell it, can't you? 15 00:01:36,480 --> 00:01:39,280 What is this, then? Yeesh, it's porridge! 16 00:01:39,320 --> 00:01:41,640 That's nice. Can you guess what this is? 17 00:01:41,680 --> 00:01:43,400 A-ha! Droppings! 18 00:01:43,440 --> 00:01:44,840 In the post? 19 00:01:44,880 --> 00:01:47,200 Ah, it's our new preventative measures. 20 00:01:47,240 --> 00:01:48,400 Modern, isn't it? 21 00:01:48,440 --> 00:01:50,000 Yes, Carmody thought of it. 22 00:01:50,040 --> 00:01:53,440 We test for conditions before animals develop symptoms. 23 00:01:53,480 --> 00:01:55,040 Notice anything? 24 00:01:55,080 --> 00:01:56,400 Oi! 25 00:01:57,800 --> 00:02:01,280 Well, the size of pellets... pygmy goat? 26 00:02:01,320 --> 00:02:03,680 On the Grantley Estate. It's quite the menagerie up there. 27 00:02:03,720 --> 00:02:05,680 Might quickly pop these under the microscope. 28 00:02:05,720 --> 00:02:06,920 Oh, I'll join you. 29 00:02:06,960 --> 00:02:09,200 Oh, Mr Farnon, I were about to serve breakfast. 30 00:02:09,240 --> 00:02:10,800 Oh, this won't take a moment. 31 00:02:12,080 --> 00:02:13,120 Oh, I'll have his. 32 00:02:13,160 --> 00:02:15,720 Ugh. Bloomin' cold. SHE SNIFFS 33 00:02:17,120 --> 00:02:19,240 Hmm... Bad news, is it? 34 00:02:19,280 --> 00:02:22,440 Worms? Plenty of eggs in here. 35 00:02:22,480 --> 00:02:24,080 Roundworm, I'd say. 36 00:02:27,120 --> 00:02:29,160 Hmm. We're low on piperazine. 37 00:02:29,200 --> 00:02:31,520 New stock arrived yesterday. Ah. 38 00:02:31,560 --> 00:02:33,640 Yes, the infestation is advanced. 39 00:02:33,680 --> 00:02:35,720 We'd better get up to the Grantley place pronto, 40 00:02:35,760 --> 00:02:36,840 before it gets out of hand. 41 00:02:36,880 --> 00:02:39,400 Thankfully, we're onto it before they've exhibited symptoms. 42 00:02:39,440 --> 00:02:41,320 Yes, bravo! AUDREY, CALLING: On t'table! 43 00:02:42,480 --> 00:02:45,080 We can see if that new worming gun delivers as expected. 44 00:02:45,120 --> 00:02:46,120 Let's hope! 45 00:02:47,680 --> 00:02:49,080 Morning! Morning. 46 00:02:49,120 --> 00:02:51,800 Blimey, James, you look the worse for wear. 47 00:02:53,680 --> 00:02:56,760 Enjoy your lie-in? Tristan took me drinking last night. 48 00:02:56,800 --> 00:02:58,000 In Ilkley. 49 00:02:58,040 --> 00:03:02,080 Oh, that den of iniquity. Feeling wretched, are we? Aye. 50 00:03:02,120 --> 00:03:04,960 Aw, did you have a fun night at the pub? 51 00:03:05,000 --> 00:03:06,680 You poor, poor man 52 00:03:07,840 --> 00:03:11,440 Need to mend this. Today. Absolutely, I'll see to it. 53 00:03:11,480 --> 00:03:14,200 But first... ..sustenance. 54 00:03:14,240 --> 00:03:16,880 Sustenance! JAMES SNORTS 55 00:03:16,920 --> 00:03:18,240 JIMMY GURGLES, LAUGHS 56 00:03:19,880 --> 00:03:22,560 JIMMY BABBLES, HE CHUCKLES 57 00:03:27,680 --> 00:03:29,800 First, this, I reckon. 58 00:03:29,840 --> 00:03:32,400 Mrs H, you're a godsend. 59 00:03:32,440 --> 00:03:34,400 I'm down for morning surgery, aren't I? 60 00:03:34,440 --> 00:03:36,080 Oh, don't fret. Enjoy your breakfast. 61 00:03:36,120 --> 00:03:39,040 You have... nine minutes. JAMES GROANS 62 00:03:41,040 --> 00:03:44,000 Legendary night, old chap. Set the bar high. 63 00:03:44,040 --> 00:03:46,160 Can we beat it tonight? Goddammit, we'll try. 64 00:03:46,200 --> 00:03:48,680 Tonight? Yeah, drinks with the Otley cricket eleven. 65 00:03:48,720 --> 00:03:51,080 Hoping they'll let me play a game. 66 00:03:51,120 --> 00:03:53,320 I'm not hearing hesitation there, am I, co-pilot? 67 00:03:53,360 --> 00:03:55,360 This is vital work for the war effort. 68 00:03:55,400 --> 00:03:57,960 I expect my brain will be re-assembled by this evening. Good. 69 00:03:59,320 --> 00:04:01,440 Didn't you have a lecture to prepare? Mm. 70 00:04:01,480 --> 00:04:04,400 A lecture? In Doncaster tomorrow. 71 00:04:04,440 --> 00:04:06,760 Getting the recruits ready for the North African front. 72 00:04:06,800 --> 00:04:08,480 Just adding some final touches today. 73 00:04:08,520 --> 00:04:12,520 What's it on? Mule hydration in desert conditions. 74 00:04:12,560 --> 00:04:15,160 Sounds a bit dry! THEY CHUCKLE 75 00:04:15,200 --> 00:04:17,320 Thanks, I think you've just given me my first line. 76 00:04:17,360 --> 00:04:18,840 I thought you were finishing it off. 77 00:04:18,880 --> 00:04:20,440 Oh, don't worry. It's all up here. 78 00:04:20,480 --> 00:04:23,040 Just a case of letting it flow out onto the page. 79 00:04:23,080 --> 00:04:25,840 You're popular this morning, Mr Carmody. 80 00:04:25,880 --> 00:04:27,920 Don't keep us in suspense. 81 00:04:27,960 --> 00:04:30,040 What type of poo did you get this time? 82 00:04:30,080 --> 00:04:32,000 Mm. Looks official. 83 00:04:33,440 --> 00:04:35,520 Royal Veterinary College. 84 00:04:35,560 --> 00:04:39,400 B-But that's your exam results. Chop, chop, man, open it! 85 00:04:50,480 --> 00:04:51,760 And? 86 00:04:53,440 --> 00:04:54,680 Says here I got a distinction. 87 00:04:54,720 --> 00:04:56,160 Oh, Richard! Oh! 88 00:04:56,200 --> 00:04:57,320 Bravo! 89 00:04:58,960 --> 00:05:01,240 Apparently, the outstanding distinction in the year. 90 00:05:01,280 --> 00:05:04,040 Well done, old chap! Well done, Mr Carmody. 91 00:05:04,080 --> 00:05:05,240 That's incredible. 92 00:05:05,280 --> 00:05:07,880 I never thought I'd see the day someone bested ME at exams. 93 00:05:07,920 --> 00:05:09,160 THEY CHUCKLE 94 00:05:09,200 --> 00:05:12,520 That is tremendous news! Might I see? 95 00:05:12,560 --> 00:05:15,480 Thank you. I think I need to take a moment. 96 00:05:19,600 --> 00:05:22,320 The second he's centre of attention, the boy runs a mile. 97 00:05:22,360 --> 00:05:25,440 Wonder what his plans are now. He's qualified. 98 00:05:25,480 --> 00:05:28,200 If we're keeping him here, we'll have to formally offer him a job. 99 00:05:28,240 --> 00:05:32,000 Well, we couldn't do any better. I take it you've no objection? 100 00:05:33,600 --> 00:05:36,040 Aye, he just about passes muster. 101 00:05:36,080 --> 00:05:38,560 It's a pleasure working alongside him. 102 00:05:38,600 --> 00:05:41,440 Finally, a scientific brain and veterinary intelligence 103 00:05:41,480 --> 00:05:43,120 that matches my own. 104 00:05:43,160 --> 00:05:44,920 Oh, don't mind me, Siegfried. 105 00:05:44,960 --> 00:05:46,480 DOORBELL RINGS Don't mind me. 106 00:05:46,520 --> 00:05:47,960 Door! 107 00:05:50,200 --> 00:05:53,000 BELL RINGS AGAIN Door! 108 00:05:54,920 --> 00:05:56,400 Bye, Jimmy. 109 00:05:59,520 --> 00:06:02,040 - Mr Carmody, isn't it? - Mm. 110 00:06:02,080 --> 00:06:04,240 You fixed up Candy, didn't you? Jenny's horse. 111 00:06:05,960 --> 00:06:08,080 Yes.. I... 112 00:06:08,120 --> 00:06:10,000 Richard. 113 00:06:10,040 --> 00:06:11,680 Yes. The horse. 114 00:06:12,880 --> 00:06:14,040 Candy is a horse. 115 00:06:16,480 --> 00:06:17,880 Lovely morning. 116 00:06:19,200 --> 00:06:24,560 I like the sun, erm... and the blue, blue sky. 117 00:06:26,480 --> 00:06:28,920 Important factors that make up the lovely morning, 118 00:06:28,960 --> 00:06:30,360 you're not wrong there. 119 00:06:30,400 --> 00:06:33,640 Please, erm, Mr Herriot will see you in a moment. 120 00:06:39,600 --> 00:06:41,680 Take a seat, Doris, be with you shortly. 121 00:06:44,040 --> 00:06:45,760 Goodness. 122 00:06:45,800 --> 00:06:47,440 What are you doing? 123 00:06:50,040 --> 00:06:52,080 SQUEAKING 124 00:06:53,400 --> 00:06:57,920 That land girl, her name escapes me. I'm surprised you'd forget. 125 00:06:57,960 --> 00:06:59,600 Such a beautiful, musical name. 126 00:06:59,640 --> 00:07:01,960 Doris. Quite. 127 00:07:02,000 --> 00:07:04,800 When she's near, I exhibit certain symptoms. 128 00:07:04,840 --> 00:07:07,480 My heart rate goes up. My pupils dilate. 129 00:07:07,520 --> 00:07:09,320 Mr Farnon, my diagnosis 130 00:07:09,360 --> 00:07:11,560 is that I'm developing romantic feelings for Doris. 131 00:07:11,600 --> 00:07:13,920 That would also be my diagnosis. 132 00:07:13,960 --> 00:07:15,360 It may surprise you to know, 133 00:07:15,400 --> 00:07:18,200 but I haven't had a great deal of experience in this area. 134 00:07:18,240 --> 00:07:21,520 That is surprising. So I badly need some advice. 135 00:07:21,560 --> 00:07:24,520 Lucky Tristan's on hand. You could always ask me. 136 00:07:24,560 --> 00:07:27,680 I happen to be an expert in affairs of the heart. 137 00:07:27,720 --> 00:07:29,360 Really? 138 00:07:29,400 --> 00:07:31,080 It's just, I've been here 18 months, 139 00:07:31,120 --> 00:07:32,880 I don't think I've once seen you with a woman. 140 00:07:32,920 --> 00:07:34,680 ENGINE STARTS 141 00:07:34,720 --> 00:07:36,640 Well, only because there's a war on. 142 00:07:39,800 --> 00:07:42,720 Richard, you can trust me on this one, I know what I'm talking about. 143 00:07:42,760 --> 00:07:44,440 Very kind offer. 144 00:07:44,480 --> 00:07:47,240 And if Tristan omits anything, I'll be sure to pick up with you. 145 00:07:57,720 --> 00:08:00,120 Magnificent animal. 146 00:08:00,160 --> 00:08:03,600 Gah, what have you been feeding him? David's not even my biggest. 147 00:08:03,640 --> 00:08:05,720 Got yourself a Goliath, have you? 148 00:08:05,760 --> 00:08:09,040 THEY LAUGH Happen I have! 149 00:08:09,080 --> 00:08:11,000 Our new rat catchers. 150 00:08:11,040 --> 00:08:13,240 Danby's got me training eight of them now. 151 00:08:13,280 --> 00:08:15,520 Looks like they enjoy the taste of fingers. 152 00:08:15,560 --> 00:08:18,560 Haven't got the measure of them yet. Mm. 153 00:08:18,600 --> 00:08:19,760 Is it bad? 154 00:08:19,800 --> 00:08:21,560 I reckon he must have snagged himself 155 00:08:21,600 --> 00:08:23,400 on a piece of wire or summat. 156 00:08:24,480 --> 00:08:27,120 It were your first ratting, weren't it, David? 157 00:08:29,040 --> 00:08:31,680 It's fairly deep, unfortunately. 158 00:08:31,720 --> 00:08:35,080 Is he healthy otherwise? Seems to be. 159 00:08:35,120 --> 00:08:38,960 I'll remove any dirt and debris, then we'll operate. 160 00:08:39,000 --> 00:08:41,680 Operate? Is he gonna be all right? 161 00:08:41,720 --> 00:08:44,440 Oh, yes, it's a simple enough procedure. 162 00:08:44,480 --> 00:08:46,200 Though, I will have to sedate him. 163 00:08:46,240 --> 00:08:47,880 I'll do it after morning surgery. 164 00:08:47,920 --> 00:08:51,600 But... Mr Danby expects me back. You're to leave him here. 165 00:08:51,640 --> 00:08:54,120 Pick him up later in the afternoon? 166 00:08:54,160 --> 00:08:55,640 Right you are. 167 00:08:58,480 --> 00:08:59,480 Oh! 168 00:08:59,520 --> 00:09:01,280 RATTLE JINGLES, JIMMY GIGGLES 169 00:09:01,320 --> 00:09:04,600 Yes! You got it. Oh, Doris. 170 00:09:04,640 --> 00:09:08,840 Mrs Herriot. Hello there, you. 171 00:09:08,880 --> 00:09:12,360 Ooh, what happened to you? Oh, one of my new ferrets. 172 00:09:12,400 --> 00:09:15,640 He's in for an operation. Oh, James'll see him right. 173 00:09:15,680 --> 00:09:20,080 Well, Mr Danby doesn't like to be kept waiting. Ta-ta! 174 00:09:20,120 --> 00:09:22,520 Our Jenny mentioned you were having a few snags with Danby. 175 00:09:22,560 --> 00:09:25,200 Oh... no. No, he... 176 00:09:26,480 --> 00:09:29,640 Well... he's not the easiest. 177 00:09:30,920 --> 00:09:33,800 Shall we fix this up? Have a brew while we're at it. 178 00:09:33,840 --> 00:09:36,760 Thanks, Mrs Herriot. It's Helen. 179 00:09:41,520 --> 00:09:43,280 HE SIGHS 180 00:09:48,480 --> 00:09:50,160 Hm. 181 00:10:01,120 --> 00:10:03,880 What? Helps me think. 182 00:10:03,920 --> 00:10:05,400 DOG WHINES 183 00:10:08,640 --> 00:10:10,400 All right. 184 00:10:12,440 --> 00:10:14,720 I'm curious about something. Please. 185 00:10:14,760 --> 00:10:17,160 I was under the impression that receiving 186 00:10:17,200 --> 00:10:20,600 the outstanding distinction in your year 187 00:10:20,640 --> 00:10:22,920 put one in line for the Warners Prize. 188 00:10:24,040 --> 00:10:26,000 Oh? Yes... 189 00:10:27,360 --> 00:10:30,400 ..a research programme at Imperial London. 190 00:10:31,560 --> 00:10:34,320 So, has that been discontinued? 191 00:10:35,640 --> 00:10:38,560 Actually... it's not discontinued. 192 00:10:40,040 --> 00:10:41,120 They offered it to me. 193 00:10:42,800 --> 00:10:45,000 BRAKES SQUEAL 194 00:10:45,040 --> 00:10:47,920 You got it? But that's splendid! 195 00:10:47,960 --> 00:10:49,800 What an incredible honour! 196 00:10:49,840 --> 00:10:51,320 But that must've been in your letter, 197 00:10:51,360 --> 00:10:53,120 why on Earth would you keep it under your hat? 198 00:10:54,560 --> 00:10:55,560 Because... 199 00:10:56,600 --> 00:10:58,520 ..much as I'd love to spend my time researching, 200 00:10:58,560 --> 00:10:59,560 I can't possibly accept. 201 00:10:59,600 --> 00:11:01,360 Why not? 202 00:11:01,400 --> 00:11:03,680 I've heard soldiers' stories first-hand. 203 00:11:03,720 --> 00:11:06,400 I'm not fighting. At least I should be serving. 204 00:11:06,440 --> 00:11:08,400 Vets are vital to the war effort. 205 00:11:08,440 --> 00:11:10,960 Me off having a jolly in a lab while everyone else is suffering? 206 00:11:11,000 --> 00:11:13,000 No, I'd feel like some kind of libertine. Well... 207 00:11:13,040 --> 00:11:16,160 In fact, now I'm qualified, I rather hoped I might stay on at Skeldale. 208 00:11:16,200 --> 00:11:20,480 You're saying you're turning down the Warners to stay here? 209 00:11:20,520 --> 00:11:23,480 Of course, when the war's won, you may wish for a new veterinary team, 210 00:11:23,520 --> 00:11:24,520 that's understood. 211 00:11:24,560 --> 00:11:26,360 Richard, you're in. 212 00:11:26,400 --> 00:11:28,360 There's nothing I'd like more. 213 00:11:33,000 --> 00:11:34,800 ENGINE STARTS 214 00:11:56,480 --> 00:11:57,840 WOMAN, DISTANT: I'm in here! 215 00:12:02,360 --> 00:12:04,840 Miss Grantley. Mr Carmody. 216 00:12:04,880 --> 00:12:06,760 How are those goats of yours faring? 217 00:12:06,800 --> 00:12:09,920 Well, they're... they're in fine spirits, I'd say. 218 00:12:09,960 --> 00:12:12,960 I was surprised by your call. What's so urgent? 219 00:12:13,000 --> 00:12:14,240 Roundworm. Oh. 220 00:12:14,280 --> 00:12:16,840 Don't worry - thanks to our new postal pellet system, 221 00:12:16,880 --> 00:12:19,160 we were onto it before your herd suffer any consequences. 222 00:12:19,200 --> 00:12:21,600 Oh, that's marvellous. Thank you. No, thank you. 223 00:12:21,640 --> 00:12:24,480 Believe it or not, you're the only client who agreed to post me faeces. 224 00:12:24,520 --> 00:12:25,920 SHE CHUCKLES AWKWARDLY 225 00:12:25,960 --> 00:12:27,560 This is Mr Farnon. 226 00:12:28,920 --> 00:12:30,840 THEY LAUGH 227 00:12:30,880 --> 00:12:32,800 Catherine Grantley. Siegfried Farnon. 228 00:12:32,840 --> 00:12:34,200 How do you do? 229 00:12:34,240 --> 00:12:37,240 I was up here before for your brother's beagles. 230 00:12:37,280 --> 00:12:39,640 He mentioned you lived abroad. Persia. 231 00:12:41,480 --> 00:12:43,440 The war took him to London, 232 00:12:43,480 --> 00:12:46,280 so I'm taking care of the estate while he's gone. 233 00:12:46,320 --> 00:12:48,280 Right, follow me. 234 00:12:48,320 --> 00:12:50,960 Biyayid, biyayid! Yalla, yalla! DOGS BARKING 235 00:12:55,200 --> 00:12:57,640 I thought it was the brother who was looking after the estate. 236 00:12:57,680 --> 00:13:00,160 Why didn't you tell me it was the sister who was running things? 237 00:13:00,200 --> 00:13:02,120 Brother, sister, what difference does it make? 238 00:13:02,160 --> 00:13:03,880 Well, it's just highly unprofessional 239 00:13:03,920 --> 00:13:05,560 not to give me the full information. 240 00:13:05,600 --> 00:13:06,640 Is it? 241 00:13:08,840 --> 00:13:10,840 BLEATING 242 00:13:20,600 --> 00:13:24,560 He just can't see past the fact I'm a girl who grew up in the big city. 243 00:13:24,600 --> 00:13:26,240 Sounds like Danby, all right. 244 00:13:26,280 --> 00:13:28,240 DORIS SIGHS The old man's set in his ways. 245 00:13:28,280 --> 00:13:32,000 You mustn't take it to heart. I'm not scared of farm work, 246 00:13:32,040 --> 00:13:35,240 but when I ask Mr Danby for advice, the man just grunts. 247 00:13:35,280 --> 00:13:37,840 I'm forever sprinting to Heston to ask Jenny. 248 00:13:39,080 --> 00:13:42,240 Luckily, I know how to interpret the Danby grunts. 249 00:13:42,280 --> 00:13:44,120 Turns out there's only three kinds. 250 00:13:44,160 --> 00:13:47,600 There's one like this... EXASPERATED GROAN 251 00:13:47,640 --> 00:13:50,840 That means, "Stop, stop, you're doing it wrong." 252 00:13:50,880 --> 00:13:53,400 GROWLING GROAN "Work faster, will you?" 253 00:13:53,440 --> 00:13:57,040 Number three... GUTTURAL GROWL 254 00:13:57,080 --> 00:13:59,800 "Carry on while I have an afternoon nap." 255 00:13:59,840 --> 00:14:02,040 Sometimes, till dinner time. 256 00:14:02,080 --> 00:14:04,400 Well, I know you don't mind a bit of graft. 257 00:14:04,440 --> 00:14:06,040 I do not. 258 00:14:06,080 --> 00:14:07,600 You know, there's plenty folk, 259 00:14:07,640 --> 00:14:10,200 you throw 'em in at the deep end like that, they'd just drown. 260 00:14:10,240 --> 00:14:13,160 Still, it wouldn't hurt Danby to give Doris clear instructions. 261 00:14:13,200 --> 00:14:14,400 JIMMY SQUEALS 262 00:14:14,440 --> 00:14:16,240 Oh... 263 00:14:16,280 --> 00:14:19,160 And that means, "I need my nappy changing." 264 00:14:19,200 --> 00:14:20,920 Oh! 265 00:14:23,520 --> 00:14:24,960 HORNS BEEPING 266 00:14:25,000 --> 00:14:27,080 Watch where you're going! 267 00:14:28,760 --> 00:14:30,560 BEEPING 268 00:14:41,440 --> 00:14:43,640 KNOCK AT DOOR 269 00:14:43,680 --> 00:14:45,600 KNOCKING CONTINUES 270 00:14:48,880 --> 00:14:50,920 Mrs Hall, we have a situation. 271 00:14:54,360 --> 00:14:56,240 DOG BARKS 272 00:14:57,920 --> 00:14:59,800 A situation? 273 00:14:59,840 --> 00:15:03,040 Summat dropped on Mr Hampson's top field last night. 274 00:15:03,080 --> 00:15:05,360 An unidentified object. 275 00:15:06,480 --> 00:15:09,240 Sorry, do you mean a bomb? Shh! 276 00:15:09,280 --> 00:15:10,440 DOG BARKS 277 00:15:10,480 --> 00:15:13,920 Someone hears us, panic will spread through Darrowby like wildfire. 278 00:15:13,960 --> 00:15:17,120 Careless talk costs lives. But if it's a... 279 00:15:18,320 --> 00:15:20,840 Shouldn't we call in the Home Guard? 280 00:15:20,880 --> 00:15:22,480 No, that's just it. 281 00:15:22,520 --> 00:15:25,960 Protocol demands that we wardens make the initial assessment. 282 00:15:26,000 --> 00:15:28,680 In fact, I was halfway there when I remembered - 283 00:15:28,720 --> 00:15:31,120 section 15, rule 5B of the handbook, 284 00:15:31,160 --> 00:15:35,880 "Two wardens must be present to confirm any sighting." 285 00:15:37,040 --> 00:15:39,160 SHE SIGHS I'll grab my coat. 286 00:15:39,200 --> 00:15:42,680 Mrs Hall, think, think, think. It's official business. 287 00:15:42,720 --> 00:15:45,040 A uniform is mandatory. 288 00:15:45,080 --> 00:15:47,760 Shouldn't we just get there as fast as possible? 289 00:15:47,800 --> 00:15:49,480 Why don't I grab my helmet? 290 00:15:51,080 --> 00:15:54,400 Well, then, I... suppose I'll change. 291 00:15:54,440 --> 00:15:56,440 Yes. I'll be outside. 292 00:15:56,480 --> 00:15:58,760 Luckily, I managed to commandeer a vehicle. 293 00:15:58,800 --> 00:16:00,400 'Ey up, Mr Bosworth. 294 00:16:01,720 --> 00:16:06,080 Doris from up Mr Danby's. You wanted me to paint all his cows. 295 00:16:06,120 --> 00:16:08,000 It stuck in my memory, for some reason. 296 00:16:08,040 --> 00:16:10,440 Ah, yes, I remember. 297 00:16:10,480 --> 00:16:12,920 And where's that lovely dog of yours today? 298 00:16:16,160 --> 00:16:19,720 I'm afraid dear Bingo has departed this world. Oh! 299 00:16:19,760 --> 00:16:22,120 Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. 300 00:16:22,160 --> 00:16:23,440 Mrs Hall, I'll be outside. 301 00:16:25,240 --> 00:16:26,360 DOG BARKS, DUCK QUACKS 302 00:16:26,400 --> 00:16:28,680 Bless him. Poor man took it hard. 303 00:16:28,720 --> 00:16:30,880 Though he did drive us half-mad that day, 304 00:16:30,920 --> 00:16:33,000 acting like a bit of paint on cows 305 00:16:33,040 --> 00:16:35,320 was gonna make Mr Hitler turn his tanks round. 306 00:16:35,360 --> 00:16:38,200 Oh, well. See, silver linings - 307 00:16:38,240 --> 00:16:40,480 all your employer does is grunt. 308 00:16:40,520 --> 00:16:42,280 DORIS LAUGHS 309 00:16:42,320 --> 00:16:44,040 Small mercies. 310 00:16:50,960 --> 00:16:52,360 There you are, all done. 311 00:16:52,400 --> 00:16:54,160 Looks like you chaps are making progress. 312 00:16:54,200 --> 00:16:57,120 Indeed we are, and our new worming gun is working a treat. 313 00:16:57,160 --> 00:16:58,840 Oh, er... 314 00:16:59,920 --> 00:17:02,360 You know, I'm intrigued, why Persia? 315 00:17:02,400 --> 00:17:04,080 Miss Grantley's an archaeologist. 316 00:17:04,120 --> 00:17:08,640 Yes, I lived there for, well, over 20 years or more. 317 00:17:08,680 --> 00:17:11,000 But unfortunately, Iran's Shah is rather taken 318 00:17:11,040 --> 00:17:13,320 with our Nazi opponents, so I had to stop digging. 319 00:17:13,360 --> 00:17:16,960 Yeah. The war demands sacrifices from us all. 320 00:17:17,000 --> 00:17:19,400 Yes... Yes, it does. 321 00:17:20,560 --> 00:17:22,320 Well, that about does it. 322 00:17:22,360 --> 00:17:24,200 Only the two little ones under the tree. 323 00:17:24,240 --> 00:17:27,200 SHE LAUGHS KINDLY Aw, these are my favourites. 324 00:17:27,240 --> 00:17:28,520 They're brothers, you know. 325 00:17:28,560 --> 00:17:32,520 Tanngrisnir and Tanngnjostr. Oh, I'm honoured. 326 00:17:32,560 --> 00:17:35,000 The goats who pull Thor's chariots, no less. 327 00:17:35,040 --> 00:17:36,440 You know your Norse mythology. 328 00:17:36,480 --> 00:17:38,440 A little. THEY CHUCKLE 329 00:17:40,120 --> 00:17:41,560 Habibi. 330 00:17:41,600 --> 00:17:43,800 They're hyper-sensitive. GOAT BLEATS 331 00:17:43,840 --> 00:17:45,360 Oh, oh. Skin crawling, is it? 332 00:17:45,400 --> 00:17:48,360 Magnesium deficiency? They're being supplemented. 333 00:17:48,400 --> 00:17:50,600 These two have been itching something rotten. 334 00:17:50,640 --> 00:17:52,640 I've heard horror stories about roundworm. 335 00:17:52,680 --> 00:17:55,680 Well, that's just it. Roundworm wouldn't make them itch. 336 00:17:55,720 --> 00:17:57,120 GOAT BLEATS Aw. 337 00:17:57,160 --> 00:17:58,320 So, we have a co-morbidity. 338 00:17:58,360 --> 00:18:02,200 Two illnesses presenting at the same time. 339 00:18:02,240 --> 00:18:03,920 It's something of a mystery. 340 00:18:03,960 --> 00:18:05,240 Lice? A mystery? 341 00:18:05,280 --> 00:18:07,840 Don't worry, we're not talking the lost treasure of Darius. 342 00:18:07,880 --> 00:18:10,240 HE CHUCKLES We'll soon have an answer for you. 343 00:18:10,280 --> 00:18:12,160 Khodafez, habibi. 344 00:18:18,400 --> 00:18:19,800 What? 345 00:18:19,840 --> 00:18:22,240 That's it. Lice? 346 00:18:22,280 --> 00:18:24,360 No, you. 347 00:18:25,600 --> 00:18:26,920 Your pupils are dilated. 348 00:18:26,960 --> 00:18:30,080 You were blushing, mirroring her actions. 349 00:18:30,120 --> 00:18:32,680 You're attracted to Miss Grantley. Oh, for God's sake! 350 00:18:32,720 --> 00:18:34,560 The symptoms never lie. 351 00:18:34,600 --> 00:18:36,480 Yes, and that's why you were annoyed 352 00:18:36,520 --> 00:18:38,240 I didn't mention that the owner was female. 353 00:18:38,280 --> 00:18:40,200 You wished to prime your feathers in readiness. 354 00:18:40,240 --> 00:18:41,520 Don't be absurd. Give me that. 355 00:18:51,480 --> 00:18:54,120 All right, lad, here we go. 356 00:18:55,520 --> 00:18:58,480 Here we go. There you are. There you are, lad. 357 00:18:58,520 --> 00:18:59,960 And it's Hedley Verity. 358 00:19:00,000 --> 00:19:01,720 Hedley Verity from the Kirkstall Lane End! 359 00:19:01,760 --> 00:19:04,120 TRISTAN LAUGHS Tristan. What the...?! 360 00:19:04,160 --> 00:19:06,120 I thought you might want a little interruption. 361 00:19:06,160 --> 00:19:10,120 No, I would not. Now I've lost the blasted ferret. Oh. 362 00:19:10,160 --> 00:19:12,320 Shut the door, will you? He'll end up hunting Vonolel. 363 00:19:12,360 --> 00:19:14,920 Bloody hell, James. Why didn't you keep a firm hold of it, man? 364 00:19:14,960 --> 00:19:18,000 I'm busy! Perfectly understand. 365 00:19:23,160 --> 00:19:25,920 Ah! That's it, lad. That's it, that's it. 366 00:19:25,960 --> 00:19:28,520 There we are. There we go, lad. 367 00:19:28,560 --> 00:19:29,920 KNOCK ON WINDOW James! 368 00:19:29,960 --> 00:19:32,120 I've set the stumps up for when you are finished. 369 00:19:57,160 --> 00:19:59,160 Oh, goodness me. 370 00:19:59,200 --> 00:20:03,120 I specifically warned Mr Hampson not to talk. 371 00:20:03,160 --> 00:20:06,400 Some folk hear there might be a bomb, 372 00:20:06,440 --> 00:20:07,920 they rush to get close. 373 00:20:07,960 --> 00:20:12,280 Mrs Hall, please, not the "B" word. Remember, careless talk costs lives. 374 00:20:12,320 --> 00:20:14,520 Stand well back! It's over there. 375 00:20:14,560 --> 00:20:17,240 Get out! WHISTLE BLOWS 376 00:20:17,280 --> 00:20:19,360 The Head Warden is here. 377 00:20:19,400 --> 00:20:20,960 The Head Warden is in charge. 378 00:20:21,000 --> 00:20:24,120 I am in charge. I am in charge. Move back. 379 00:20:24,160 --> 00:20:27,120 Move back. Move well back. 380 00:20:27,160 --> 00:20:29,040 Right. 381 00:20:29,080 --> 00:20:31,680 Argh, ruddy... 382 00:20:34,920 --> 00:20:36,640 There. 383 00:20:36,680 --> 00:20:39,000 Do you see it? There's a trail. 384 00:20:39,040 --> 00:20:41,440 Yes, an impact trail. 385 00:20:41,480 --> 00:20:42,920 So we follow it. 386 00:20:42,960 --> 00:20:45,920 Proceed with extreme caution, Mrs Hall. 387 00:20:45,960 --> 00:20:48,400 Mr Bosworth, say we do find a bomb... 388 00:20:48,440 --> 00:20:49,480 HE STAMMERS 389 00:20:49,520 --> 00:20:51,160 In the event of a positive assessment, 390 00:20:51,200 --> 00:20:52,640 we phone from Hampson's 391 00:20:52,680 --> 00:20:55,160 and report to the District Report Centre. 392 00:20:58,320 --> 00:21:00,280 Stay alert, Mrs Hall. 393 00:21:00,320 --> 00:21:02,040 Proceed with caution. 394 00:21:06,240 --> 00:21:08,560 HE STRAINS 395 00:21:14,040 --> 00:21:15,600 DUCKS QUACK Whoa! 396 00:21:17,360 --> 00:21:18,960 Bloody hell. 397 00:21:19,000 --> 00:21:21,320 HE PANTS 398 00:21:28,040 --> 00:21:30,560 Mrs Hall, we only need to identify it. 399 00:21:30,600 --> 00:21:32,480 That's not a bomb. 400 00:21:34,880 --> 00:21:36,480 That's a flight crate. 401 00:21:37,560 --> 00:21:38,720 No, don't. 402 00:21:38,760 --> 00:21:41,680 Don't. It... It might be munitions. 403 00:21:41,720 --> 00:21:43,160 We don't know what's inside. 404 00:21:43,200 --> 00:21:46,400 Well, we do actually. SHE CHUCKLES 405 00:21:46,440 --> 00:21:47,800 Tinned potatoes. 406 00:21:50,320 --> 00:21:53,760 Powdered eggs, flour, 407 00:21:53,800 --> 00:21:56,600 toothbrushes, paste, soap. 408 00:21:56,640 --> 00:21:59,600 So someone could've landed here. 409 00:22:00,680 --> 00:22:02,480 Nazi spies. 410 00:22:02,520 --> 00:22:04,520 Well, do Nazis use Pears soap? 411 00:22:04,560 --> 00:22:07,760 And Gibbs SR Toothpaste? 412 00:22:07,800 --> 00:22:11,240 No. No, this will have come from one of our planes. 413 00:22:11,280 --> 00:22:12,840 We'll probably find they've had a call 414 00:22:12,880 --> 00:22:14,560 about another one further down the road. 415 00:22:15,800 --> 00:22:18,000 Mr Herriot says it's common. 416 00:22:18,040 --> 00:22:20,560 When fuel runs low, they dump the excess weight. 417 00:22:20,600 --> 00:22:23,520 Mm, it's one possibility amongst many. 418 00:22:23,560 --> 00:22:24,840 And since, Mrs Hall, 419 00:22:24,880 --> 00:22:28,160 you are not yourself an expert on spies or bombs... 420 00:22:28,200 --> 00:22:30,120 Shh! Careless talk... 421 00:22:30,160 --> 00:22:31,600 HE STAMMERS 422 00:22:31,640 --> 00:22:36,720 I would simply advise that you resist jumping to conclusions. 423 00:22:36,760 --> 00:22:39,160 You may be risking innocent lives! 424 00:22:40,520 --> 00:22:42,200 SHE SIGHS 425 00:22:53,480 --> 00:22:55,080 So, it's not lice. 426 00:22:56,920 --> 00:22:59,000 Where do we go from here? 427 00:22:59,040 --> 00:23:00,640 A damned puzzle is what it is. 428 00:23:01,880 --> 00:23:03,520 Why aren't they with the others? 429 00:23:03,560 --> 00:23:06,360 Come on, they've been under that tree the whole time we've been here. 430 00:23:06,400 --> 00:23:09,280 Golly, you've figured it out, haven't you? 431 00:23:09,320 --> 00:23:10,920 SIEGFRIED CHUCKLES 432 00:23:10,960 --> 00:23:12,840 Well, it's a lovely sunny day - 433 00:23:12,880 --> 00:23:14,840 suggests some reaction to the hot weather. 434 00:23:14,880 --> 00:23:17,360 Heat stress? Then why the itching? 435 00:23:17,400 --> 00:23:19,360 Or light. 436 00:23:19,400 --> 00:23:21,240 Oh, I know where you're going with this. Wait. 437 00:23:21,280 --> 00:23:23,000 SIEGFRIED LAUGHS 438 00:23:28,720 --> 00:23:29,800 St John's Wort. 439 00:23:29,840 --> 00:23:31,640 I think the brothers have been munching on it. 440 00:23:34,400 --> 00:23:36,160 And now they don't want to go out into the sun. 441 00:23:36,200 --> 00:23:38,920 It's made them photosensitive. They don't want to get sunburned. 442 00:23:38,960 --> 00:23:40,440 Splendid. Well done, Mr Farnon. 443 00:23:40,480 --> 00:23:42,440 Ah, tush. You'd have put it together before long. 444 00:23:42,480 --> 00:23:45,680 Good news? I was about to offer you some coffee. 445 00:23:45,720 --> 00:23:48,680 Mr Farnon's just solved it. Oh? 446 00:23:48,720 --> 00:23:50,520 He's such an accomplished vet. 447 00:23:50,560 --> 00:23:53,640 All in all, he's clever, dependable, the kindest of men. 448 00:23:55,040 --> 00:23:57,000 And not currently in a pair-bond. 449 00:23:59,080 --> 00:24:01,160 SHE CHUCKLES Come on, come on. 450 00:24:09,960 --> 00:24:11,160 Listen, Carmody. 451 00:24:11,200 --> 00:24:14,080 That was bloody embarrassing. What the hell were you thinking? 452 00:24:14,120 --> 00:24:16,240 But you like her, so why wouldn't I help? 453 00:24:16,280 --> 00:24:17,720 A "pair-bond"? 454 00:24:18,880 --> 00:24:21,880 Humans are like swans and foxes. They generally thrive in pair-bonds. 455 00:24:21,920 --> 00:24:25,920 Carmody, this is far from your area of expertise. Very far. 456 00:24:26,960 --> 00:24:28,720 There's a... 457 00:24:28,760 --> 00:24:31,400 a pace at which these things are done, a subtlety. 458 00:24:32,560 --> 00:24:33,840 Sorry. 459 00:24:33,880 --> 00:24:36,880 It's just looked like you might be succumbing to fight or flight. 460 00:24:36,920 --> 00:24:39,040 Raised anxiety because you're overwhelmed 461 00:24:39,080 --> 00:24:41,320 by your attraction to her. I know what it means. 462 00:24:41,360 --> 00:24:43,840 Richard, I am perfectly capable with women. 463 00:24:43,880 --> 00:24:45,440 Perfectly capable. 464 00:24:47,160 --> 00:24:48,680 Oh... 465 00:24:50,440 --> 00:24:54,120 Just get these two inside, out of the sunlight. 466 00:24:54,160 --> 00:24:56,880 Coffee's ready for you both. 467 00:24:56,920 --> 00:24:59,800 - Thank you, Miss Grantley. - Thank you, Miss Grantley. 468 00:25:04,840 --> 00:25:06,880 JIMMY BABBLES 469 00:25:06,920 --> 00:25:09,440 ..this blasted thing hate me so much? 470 00:25:09,480 --> 00:25:10,920 Oh, dear. Bye-bye. 471 00:25:10,960 --> 00:25:13,600 Bye-bye, little man. 472 00:25:13,640 --> 00:25:16,640 Bye-bye. Hold on, where are you going? 473 00:25:16,680 --> 00:25:19,000 I promised I'd pull up Dot Fawcett's radishes. 474 00:25:20,160 --> 00:25:21,880 Good luck. 475 00:25:23,600 --> 00:25:25,960 Ah, there he is, my errant batsman. 476 00:25:26,000 --> 00:25:27,520 Mind if I borrow him for 30 minutes? 477 00:25:27,560 --> 00:25:29,000 I want to see if he can spot my googly. 478 00:25:29,040 --> 00:25:31,760 Try me at the weekend. I tell you what - I'll help. 479 00:25:31,800 --> 00:25:33,800 We finish in double time. Time you save, you bat. 480 00:25:33,840 --> 00:25:36,440 I've got Jimmy for an hour, then I'm back in surgery. 481 00:25:36,480 --> 00:25:39,000 Siegfried's got a better screwdriver than that. Two seconds. 482 00:25:39,040 --> 00:25:40,640 FOOTSTEPS RECEDE 483 00:25:42,120 --> 00:25:45,520 It's not enough that we're back out drinking again tonight? 484 00:25:45,560 --> 00:25:48,400 How on Earth did I end up looking after Tristan 485 00:25:48,440 --> 00:25:50,000 on top of everything else? 486 00:25:50,040 --> 00:25:51,880 The night calls, Jimmy teething, 487 00:25:51,920 --> 00:25:53,960 up all hours... You know it's not that complicated. 488 00:25:54,000 --> 00:25:55,680 You just tell Tris you're staying in. 489 00:25:55,720 --> 00:25:58,800 If he's redeployed, he might not be back forever. 490 00:26:01,240 --> 00:26:02,800 He'll need some happy memories. 491 00:26:02,840 --> 00:26:05,280 Tristan's had enough drunken nights to last a lifetime. 492 00:26:05,320 --> 00:26:06,960 HE CHUCKLES 493 00:26:07,000 --> 00:26:08,320 Talk to him. 494 00:26:09,760 --> 00:26:12,400 Cheerio, Helen. Here we are, old boy. 495 00:26:12,440 --> 00:26:14,480 HE IMITATES AEROPLANE 496 00:26:14,520 --> 00:26:15,680 JIMMY LAUGHS 497 00:26:15,720 --> 00:26:18,280 Now, let's show your daddy how it's done, all right? 498 00:26:18,320 --> 00:26:19,600 Pass it here. 499 00:26:20,640 --> 00:26:21,720 No... JAMES SIGHS 500 00:26:23,280 --> 00:26:25,880 In the left. Watch and learn. 501 00:26:28,400 --> 00:26:30,280 SNAPPING, CLATTERING 502 00:26:30,320 --> 00:26:31,880 JIMMY FUSSES 503 00:26:36,600 --> 00:26:38,000 I shall make my report 504 00:26:38,040 --> 00:26:41,840 to the District Report Centre from the Hampson's property. 505 00:26:41,880 --> 00:26:44,120 Not a word to these bystanders. 506 00:26:44,160 --> 00:26:46,640 Yeah, they mustn't hear about the tinned potatoes 507 00:26:46,680 --> 00:26:50,480 Head Office may wish to make further identification. 508 00:26:50,520 --> 00:26:53,280 So now you're gonna call out the Home Guard? 509 00:26:53,320 --> 00:26:55,280 To identify a bar of soap? 510 00:26:55,320 --> 00:26:59,120 It's important to dot the Is and cross the Ts, that's all. 511 00:26:59,160 --> 00:27:01,600 You're not still thinking it's enemy spies? 512 00:27:01,640 --> 00:27:04,360 Nobody parachuted off that plane. 513 00:27:04,400 --> 00:27:07,440 We can't say for certain. What's got into you? 514 00:27:07,480 --> 00:27:09,960 Anybody would think you want Darrowby to be in danger. 515 00:27:10,000 --> 00:27:12,480 Come on, now. I've got a busy day. 516 00:27:12,520 --> 00:27:14,600 Well, the quicker I get my report in, 517 00:27:14,640 --> 00:27:16,280 the safer Darrowby will be. 518 00:27:16,320 --> 00:27:19,840 Fine, I will utilise my home telephone. 519 00:27:19,880 --> 00:27:20,960 HE GRUMBLES 520 00:27:23,080 --> 00:27:25,160 Absolutely, it will be with you. 521 00:27:25,200 --> 00:27:27,800 I have it right here in my hands, the next draft. 522 00:27:27,840 --> 00:27:29,360 Mm-hm. 3pm. 523 00:27:30,680 --> 00:27:32,160 Friday, I'll be there. 524 00:27:32,200 --> 00:27:34,600 Goodbye. Thank you, Martha. 525 00:27:38,600 --> 00:27:40,720 I'm confused, Mr Carmody. 526 00:27:40,760 --> 00:27:45,240 St John's Wort is a boost to humans, but toxic to goats? 527 00:27:46,400 --> 00:27:49,320 Same compound responsible, actually - hypericin. 528 00:27:49,360 --> 00:27:50,840 One of my absolute favourites. 529 00:27:50,880 --> 00:27:52,920 On contact with light, the hypericin seeks out 530 00:27:52,960 --> 00:27:55,800 the goats' unpigmented cells, under the white hair, 531 00:27:55,840 --> 00:27:59,640 and destroys their walls, causing a severe inflammatory reaction. 532 00:27:59,680 --> 00:28:01,520 I can see why you're so fond of it. 533 00:28:01,560 --> 00:28:03,640 SIEGFRIED LAUGHS 534 00:28:03,680 --> 00:28:05,320 There's rather a lovely passage about it 535 00:28:05,360 --> 00:28:06,560 in Wilkes and Graham, in fact. 536 00:28:06,600 --> 00:28:08,440 Oh, I have a first edition, 537 00:28:08,480 --> 00:28:11,520 up on the top shelf, with my husband's books. 538 00:28:11,560 --> 00:28:13,840 Have a look. Oh. 539 00:28:15,040 --> 00:28:16,400 I will indeed. 540 00:28:19,560 --> 00:28:23,120 So, your husband stayed out East, did he? 541 00:28:23,160 --> 00:28:24,680 Well, you could say that - 542 00:28:24,720 --> 00:28:26,960 he contracted malaria out there, and... 543 00:28:28,160 --> 00:28:30,840 ..died. Oh, I'm terribly sorry. 544 00:28:33,120 --> 00:28:34,520 I know how devastating... 545 00:28:34,560 --> 00:28:37,520 No, it was... it was so long ago, 546 00:28:37,560 --> 00:28:39,920 and I was so young, I can barely remember him. 547 00:28:45,000 --> 00:28:47,800 So... SHE LAUGHS 548 00:28:47,840 --> 00:28:50,080 This was all before the Great War. 549 00:28:50,120 --> 00:28:52,960 And since then, I've... 550 00:28:53,000 --> 00:28:57,600 lived my life free of men's plans for me. 551 00:28:58,880 --> 00:29:00,840 Ah! THEY CHUCKLE 552 00:29:00,880 --> 00:29:02,600 That boy... 553 00:29:02,640 --> 00:29:04,840 He got the top distinction in his year. 554 00:29:04,880 --> 00:29:06,600 Won a prestigious research post in London. 555 00:29:06,640 --> 00:29:08,280 Golly, how smashing. 556 00:29:09,480 --> 00:29:11,160 Though I can't say I'm surprised. 557 00:29:11,200 --> 00:29:13,840 You know, I think I'm putting it together. 558 00:29:14,920 --> 00:29:16,560 Your love for goats - 559 00:29:16,600 --> 00:29:18,360 weren't they first domesticated in Persia? 560 00:29:18,400 --> 00:29:20,640 They were. Do you know when? 561 00:29:20,680 --> 00:29:22,840 I'd say around 10,000 years ago. 562 00:29:22,880 --> 00:29:24,240 Jolly good. 563 00:29:25,280 --> 00:29:27,080 In later Persian civilisations, 564 00:29:27,120 --> 00:29:31,040 goats represented divine order and goodness. 565 00:29:31,080 --> 00:29:32,720 And is that what you're writing about? 566 00:29:32,760 --> 00:29:36,840 No, actually, my book is more of an overview, 567 00:29:36,880 --> 00:29:41,080 based loosely on a series of lectures I teach at Cambridge - 568 00:29:41,120 --> 00:29:42,920 Zarathustra And Ziggurats. 569 00:29:42,960 --> 00:29:46,600 HE CHUCKLES Well, it all sounds fascinating. 570 00:29:46,640 --> 00:29:47,960 Digging for treasure, 571 00:29:48,000 --> 00:29:50,240 forgotten civilisations appearing out of the dust. 572 00:29:50,280 --> 00:29:51,600 Not a normal life. 573 00:29:52,640 --> 00:29:54,880 I sometimes wonder what I missed out on. 574 00:29:54,920 --> 00:29:56,680 You've lived on the other side of the world. 575 00:29:56,720 --> 00:29:57,800 You must have seen so much. 576 00:29:57,840 --> 00:29:59,560 There were forks in the road. 577 00:30:00,840 --> 00:30:06,520 And you never do find out what might have happened going the other way. 578 00:30:11,040 --> 00:30:12,200 No, you don't. 579 00:30:16,040 --> 00:30:18,480 The Persians believed divine will was expressed 580 00:30:18,520 --> 00:30:21,520 through a person's particular talents and interests, and I... 581 00:30:22,880 --> 00:30:26,840 I really can't think of a better way to navigate one's life. 582 00:30:30,920 --> 00:30:34,840 Mr Farnon tells me you're leaving for London. 583 00:30:34,880 --> 00:30:36,400 Congratulations. 584 00:30:38,160 --> 00:30:39,360 Your prize. 585 00:30:39,400 --> 00:30:41,000 Oh, I'm not accepting it. 586 00:30:41,040 --> 00:30:42,640 No? 587 00:30:42,680 --> 00:30:45,920 I'd much rather stay here as a vet, help with the war effort. 588 00:30:45,960 --> 00:30:47,080 Oh. 589 00:30:48,160 --> 00:30:50,280 Oh, right. Of course. 590 00:30:55,440 --> 00:30:57,080 PEACOCK CALLS 591 00:30:58,360 --> 00:31:00,320 So, Ziggurats And Zarathustra... 592 00:31:00,360 --> 00:31:03,920 Actually, it's the other way round. I'd be fascinated to read it. 593 00:31:03,960 --> 00:31:06,360 Well, I... SHE CHUCKLES 594 00:31:06,400 --> 00:31:10,160 I do have a... a draft copy. 595 00:31:11,360 --> 00:31:13,040 It's rather long. Are you quite sure? 596 00:31:13,080 --> 00:31:14,680 It would be a privilege. 597 00:31:16,120 --> 00:31:18,880 Well, you would be under absolutely no obligation whatsoever, 598 00:31:18,920 --> 00:31:21,080 but if you did decide to tackle it, 599 00:31:21,120 --> 00:31:24,440 I would be very interested to know how it lands with a general reader. 600 00:31:28,840 --> 00:31:31,360 You know, I do believe she likes those fine feathers of yours. 601 00:31:31,400 --> 00:31:33,120 Keep it down. Keep it down. 602 00:31:37,920 --> 00:31:40,440 SHE CHUCKLES Oh. Well... 603 00:31:44,440 --> 00:31:46,240 I shall treasure it, thank you. 604 00:31:46,280 --> 00:31:48,080 SHE CHUCKLES Miss Grantley. 605 00:31:48,120 --> 00:31:49,600 Mr Farnon. 606 00:31:50,880 --> 00:31:53,480 Cheerio, Miss Grantley. Cheerio. 607 00:31:57,000 --> 00:31:59,280 CHATTER 608 00:32:15,400 --> 00:32:16,680 Thank you. 609 00:32:24,720 --> 00:32:26,600 The man who sold them 610 00:32:26,640 --> 00:32:29,320 said ferrets take out rats quicker than strychnine. 611 00:32:29,360 --> 00:32:30,400 I can quite believe it. 612 00:32:30,440 --> 00:32:32,400 These chaps are their natural predators. 613 00:32:32,440 --> 00:32:34,360 Well, thank you, Mr Herriot. 614 00:32:34,400 --> 00:32:37,720 Oh, how long till he's back ratting? 615 00:32:37,760 --> 00:32:40,120 Oh, a week should do it. Right. 616 00:32:40,160 --> 00:32:43,120 You used strychnine before? Aye. 617 00:32:43,160 --> 00:32:46,360 But fat chance of getting your hands on any these past few months. 618 00:32:46,400 --> 00:32:47,680 It's like gold dust. 619 00:32:47,720 --> 00:32:51,120 Mr Farnon said Bingo's symptoms were consistent 620 00:32:51,160 --> 00:32:52,520 with strychnine poisoning. 621 00:32:52,560 --> 00:32:54,560 I'd never leave rat poison lying around. 622 00:32:54,600 --> 00:32:58,520 Just, you said Mr Bosworth were up at Danby's with Bingo? 623 00:32:58,560 --> 00:33:00,640 What did you do with the rats after you poisoned them? 624 00:33:01,840 --> 00:33:03,840 I buried them, like Mr Danby said. 625 00:33:03,880 --> 00:33:06,240 How deep? Danby didn't say. 626 00:33:06,280 --> 00:33:09,640 Doris, when a rat dies from poison, the corpse stays full of it. 627 00:33:09,680 --> 00:33:10,800 You have to bury them deep 628 00:33:10,840 --> 00:33:12,840 or the foxes dig them up and poison themselves. 629 00:33:14,640 --> 00:33:17,440 Right, it's just round this wall here. 630 00:33:24,840 --> 00:33:26,200 GASPING 631 00:33:26,240 --> 00:33:28,600 Oh, no, I didn't leave it dug up like this. 632 00:33:28,640 --> 00:33:29,800 Hey. 633 00:33:31,560 --> 00:33:34,600 Sorry, I don't think you buried them deep enough. 634 00:33:36,280 --> 00:33:37,560 So it was me. 635 00:33:38,960 --> 00:33:41,720 I murdered Bingo. Well, you weren't to know. 636 00:33:43,400 --> 00:33:45,200 Nobody told you any different, did they? 637 00:33:45,240 --> 00:33:48,120 This is his responsibility - Danby. 638 00:33:48,160 --> 00:33:50,280 Well, I'd better tell Mr Bosworth. 639 00:33:53,200 --> 00:33:54,840 Why don't you let me break it to him first? 640 00:33:54,880 --> 00:33:57,320 I could bloomin' well throttle you. 641 00:33:57,360 --> 00:33:59,280 If you showed one ounce of human kindness, 642 00:33:59,320 --> 00:34:00,680 that dog would still be alive. 643 00:34:00,720 --> 00:34:03,960 Come on, what have you got to say for yourself? 644 00:34:05,360 --> 00:34:07,960 MR DANBY GRUNTS, DORIS LAUGHS 645 00:34:09,280 --> 00:34:11,880 Googly! Yes! 646 00:34:11,920 --> 00:34:14,240 See, told you, didn't I? Went the other way entirely. 647 00:34:14,280 --> 00:34:15,800 You've bamboozled Mr James Herriot, 648 00:34:15,840 --> 00:34:17,400 but could you get it by Mr Len Hutton? 649 00:34:17,440 --> 00:34:19,000 Yes, undoubtedly. 650 00:34:19,040 --> 00:34:20,880 Come on, Jimmy lad, nap time. 651 00:34:20,920 --> 00:34:23,360 Whoa, whoa, James, get back to the crease. 652 00:34:23,400 --> 00:34:25,240 I wouldn't mind bowling again. Sorry, can't. 653 00:34:26,280 --> 00:34:27,920 Tris, I said we'd play, and we've played. 654 00:34:27,960 --> 00:34:30,120 For what? Ten minutes? Twenty, actually. 655 00:34:30,160 --> 00:34:32,080 Look... Er, let me guess. 656 00:34:32,120 --> 00:34:34,200 You're about to pull out of tonight, aren't you? 657 00:34:34,240 --> 00:34:36,200 Tactical rest before the weekend? I understand. 658 00:34:36,240 --> 00:34:38,840 I'll call the Otleys and re-arrange. Can't do the weekend. 659 00:34:38,880 --> 00:34:41,560 Oh. Something up? 660 00:34:41,600 --> 00:34:43,560 All this rabble rousing, 661 00:34:43,600 --> 00:34:45,160 time was, I'd be right at your shoulder. 662 00:34:45,200 --> 00:34:47,040 Helen doesn't mind. No, it's me. 663 00:34:47,080 --> 00:34:48,960 I want to enjoy my time with Jimmy. 664 00:34:49,000 --> 00:34:50,760 And I want my mind clear to do my best work. 665 00:34:50,800 --> 00:34:52,720 You just can't keep up with me, can you? 666 00:34:52,760 --> 00:34:54,640 I can still have fun like the old days. 667 00:34:54,680 --> 00:34:56,080 Just not every night. 668 00:34:56,120 --> 00:34:57,960 And better if you give me some warning. 669 00:34:58,000 --> 00:34:59,120 Sorry, old chap. 670 00:34:59,160 --> 00:35:01,920 Oh, perhaps, I took it a little too far. 671 00:35:01,960 --> 00:35:04,320 I just wanted to make the most of being back. 672 00:35:04,360 --> 00:35:06,120 You're all right, though? Of course. 673 00:35:06,160 --> 00:35:07,840 Come here, old chap. 674 00:35:08,960 --> 00:35:11,200 Yeah, speaking of responsibilities, 675 00:35:11,240 --> 00:35:12,920 finished that lecture of yours, have you? 676 00:35:12,960 --> 00:35:14,800 Oh, what? You think I've been distracting you 677 00:35:14,840 --> 00:35:16,720 with cricket to avoid getting it done? 678 00:35:16,760 --> 00:35:18,120 What about your playpen? 679 00:35:18,160 --> 00:35:20,520 Shouldn't you be getting back to that, hm? 680 00:35:20,560 --> 00:35:22,400 One more over? That's the ticket. 681 00:35:22,440 --> 00:35:24,200 Come on, Jimmy lad. 682 00:35:24,240 --> 00:35:27,560 Watch your father's forward defence, my boy! 683 00:35:30,360 --> 00:35:32,280 Show us your best googly, then. 684 00:35:32,320 --> 00:35:34,280 Googly! 685 00:35:34,320 --> 00:35:35,480 Yes! 686 00:35:35,520 --> 00:35:37,680 I wasn't ready. And again. 687 00:35:41,080 --> 00:35:43,040 He told me he'd made his decision. 688 00:35:46,400 --> 00:35:47,640 I see. 689 00:35:47,680 --> 00:35:50,040 I should have set him straight this morning. 690 00:35:50,080 --> 00:35:52,760 Damn it, I just wasn't prepared for him leaving so suddenly. 691 00:35:52,800 --> 00:35:55,880 It's natural enough. You want them close. 692 00:35:55,920 --> 00:35:58,880 I've got used to him being around. I was... 693 00:35:58,920 --> 00:36:00,440 selfish. 694 00:36:00,480 --> 00:36:03,160 You've helped that boy enormously. 695 00:36:03,200 --> 00:36:06,120 And what better culmination than him winning that prize? 696 00:36:06,160 --> 00:36:07,880 It's not up to me, though. 697 00:36:09,040 --> 00:36:11,360 That boy seems to have his mind all made up. 698 00:36:13,640 --> 00:36:16,680 I reckon there's more behind it than that. 699 00:36:16,720 --> 00:36:19,760 Think how Mr Camody were brought up - 700 00:36:19,800 --> 00:36:21,840 being sent from pillar to post. 701 00:36:21,880 --> 00:36:22,880 Yes. 702 00:36:27,480 --> 00:36:31,520 Yes, no, you might be on to something there. 703 00:36:31,560 --> 00:36:33,440 Thank you, Mrs Hall. I'll talk to him again. 704 00:36:36,600 --> 00:36:39,520 TRISTAN AND JAMES BREATHE HEAVILY 705 00:36:41,280 --> 00:36:42,840 What? What? 706 00:37:01,160 --> 00:37:02,520 You look busy. 707 00:37:07,680 --> 00:37:10,680 Let me guess - Imperial College. 708 00:37:12,880 --> 00:37:15,080 Your brother told you? Just now. 709 00:37:18,440 --> 00:37:20,440 Not an easy decision, as you can imagine. 710 00:37:20,480 --> 00:37:22,440 Oh, I know exactly how it feels. 711 00:37:23,520 --> 00:37:25,320 I refused the Warners, too. 712 00:37:25,360 --> 00:37:26,840 Oh? 713 00:37:26,880 --> 00:37:28,520 Right, so... 714 00:37:30,160 --> 00:37:33,160 Oh, I see. You're pulling my leg. 715 00:37:33,200 --> 00:37:34,840 Yes. 716 00:37:34,880 --> 00:37:36,880 CARMODY SIGHS 717 00:37:36,920 --> 00:37:39,040 Damned hard to find the right phrasing. 718 00:37:39,080 --> 00:37:41,200 They're honouring me. 719 00:37:41,240 --> 00:37:45,400 But my reply sounds like I'm giving them some kind of moral lecture. 720 00:37:46,680 --> 00:37:47,920 Well, good luck. 721 00:37:52,160 --> 00:37:53,440 You know... 722 00:37:55,800 --> 00:37:58,880 ..there was a time when I couldn't imagine leaving Skeldale either. 723 00:38:10,600 --> 00:38:13,160 CAR HORN TOOTS 724 00:38:13,200 --> 00:38:15,320 TOOTING CONTINUES 725 00:38:18,520 --> 00:38:20,280 TOOTING CONTINUES 726 00:38:30,800 --> 00:38:32,480 Right, what's happening? 727 00:38:32,520 --> 00:38:34,480 I'm afraid I might have... 728 00:38:34,520 --> 00:38:36,760 Oh, come on, Audrey. 729 00:38:36,800 --> 00:38:38,280 CONVERSATION CONTINUES IN DISTANCE 730 00:38:38,320 --> 00:38:40,560 Get it over with. SHE EXHALES DEEPLY 731 00:38:40,600 --> 00:38:41,960 Make a note on your pantry door. 732 00:38:42,000 --> 00:38:45,080 OK, I'm so sorry Mr Bosworth. Remember. Remember. 733 00:38:45,120 --> 00:38:46,800 Mr Bosworth? 734 00:38:48,440 --> 00:38:49,920 Can I have a word? 735 00:38:51,640 --> 00:38:56,440 Well, what a bloomin' stupid way for Bingo to go. 736 00:38:56,480 --> 00:38:58,520 I'll need a word with her. 737 00:38:59,920 --> 00:39:02,120 She feels awful about it. 738 00:39:02,160 --> 00:39:04,520 She wants to apologise in person. 739 00:39:04,560 --> 00:39:08,680 Apologise? I don't want to hear it. Will that bring him back? 740 00:39:08,720 --> 00:39:12,120 No, in fact, if you're talking to her, 741 00:39:12,160 --> 00:39:14,680 tell her this for me. Tell her... 742 00:39:14,720 --> 00:39:16,640 Tell her... 743 00:39:21,160 --> 00:39:23,240 ..Bingo brought me so much happiness... 744 00:39:25,400 --> 00:39:27,200 ..I'll not have him bringing misery to her. 745 00:39:28,400 --> 00:39:31,160 And so in conclusion, 746 00:39:31,200 --> 00:39:34,600 artful management of water supply, water conservation, 747 00:39:34,640 --> 00:39:37,360 shade and rest will protect your mules 748 00:39:37,400 --> 00:39:40,360 from dehydration, even in the most scorching of deserts. 749 00:39:40,400 --> 00:39:41,680 JIMMY GIGGLES 750 00:39:41,720 --> 00:39:43,600 Thank you. Thank you very much. 751 00:39:44,720 --> 00:39:46,040 What do you think? Too long? 752 00:39:46,080 --> 00:39:47,640 JIMMY FARTS, GIGGLES 753 00:39:47,680 --> 00:39:51,160 No, you're right. It's perfect, isn't it? Perfect. 754 00:39:51,200 --> 00:39:53,520 What did you think? Do you have any notes? 755 00:39:53,560 --> 00:39:55,200 No? No notes. 756 00:39:55,240 --> 00:39:57,560 Ha-ha-ha-ha! 757 00:40:03,400 --> 00:40:04,800 HAMISH WHINES 758 00:40:07,720 --> 00:40:09,800 You wrote your letter, then? 759 00:40:11,800 --> 00:40:13,560 In time to catch the evening post. 760 00:40:15,120 --> 00:40:17,280 Took me an age to figure out how to phrase it. 761 00:40:17,320 --> 00:40:19,240 Better for it to be logical. 762 00:40:19,280 --> 00:40:21,640 Struggling to find the logic, were you? 763 00:40:21,680 --> 00:40:24,600 No, my answer made complete sense. 764 00:40:27,440 --> 00:40:30,000 I just don't know any more. That's the truth of it. 765 00:40:30,040 --> 00:40:33,040 You know, if you were to go off to London... 766 00:40:35,040 --> 00:40:37,440 ..I hope you know, there's always a place here for you. 767 00:40:37,480 --> 00:40:41,720 No, see, if I took the Warners, I'd be leaving practice, 768 00:40:41,760 --> 00:40:43,080 to do research, primarily. 769 00:40:43,120 --> 00:40:45,200 I don't mean as a vet. 770 00:40:48,440 --> 00:40:49,560 Oh. 771 00:40:56,960 --> 00:41:00,120 JIMMY COOS And that should... 772 00:41:01,280 --> 00:41:02,720 ..do it. Aw. 773 00:41:02,760 --> 00:41:05,480 There we go. 774 00:41:05,520 --> 00:41:06,720 Aw! 775 00:41:06,760 --> 00:41:09,360 BELL RINGS, JIMMY BABBLES 776 00:41:11,160 --> 00:41:13,880 Well, hello. Aw! 777 00:41:15,280 --> 00:41:16,560 CARMODY CLEARS THROAT 778 00:41:17,760 --> 00:41:19,760 HE STAMMERS, SIGHS 779 00:41:19,800 --> 00:41:22,520 I... Well... 780 00:41:22,560 --> 00:41:23,840 I think I have an announcement. 781 00:41:25,840 --> 00:41:26,960 Hamish. 782 00:41:31,000 --> 00:41:34,240 This morning, I found out I was awarded the Warners Prize. 783 00:41:34,280 --> 00:41:38,400 Accepting it would mean an imminent departure for London. 784 00:41:38,440 --> 00:41:39,960 Oh. The Warners, eh? 785 00:41:42,040 --> 00:41:43,400 After some consideration... 786 00:41:44,440 --> 00:41:46,120 ..I've decided to accept. 787 00:41:47,840 --> 00:41:49,880 That's bloody marvellous, old chap. 788 00:41:51,440 --> 00:41:54,040 Ten days' time, I start. Down in London. 789 00:41:54,080 --> 00:41:55,720 But that's so soon. 790 00:41:55,760 --> 00:41:57,600 It must have been a tough decision, pal, 791 00:41:57,640 --> 00:41:59,200 but I see great things ahead. 792 00:41:59,240 --> 00:42:00,320 Oh, come here. 793 00:42:00,360 --> 00:42:02,600 Bloomin' wonderful news. The place won't be the same. 794 00:42:04,200 --> 00:42:05,960 I rather wish I could take you all with me. 795 00:42:06,000 --> 00:42:09,280 That'd be some suitcase. THEY LAUGH 796 00:42:09,320 --> 00:42:11,840 Right, this calls for a celebratory drink. 797 00:42:12,920 --> 00:42:15,160 I mean, I'm finally getting my bed back. 798 00:42:15,200 --> 00:42:17,400 James won't be able to make it, of course. 799 00:42:17,440 --> 00:42:19,640 You have to give him at least six months' notice 800 00:42:19,680 --> 00:42:21,640 Ha-ha! Richard? Beers? 801 00:42:21,680 --> 00:42:24,160 You go. I'll join you. 802 00:42:24,200 --> 00:42:26,640 I have to do some reading. 803 00:42:32,840 --> 00:42:37,200 Mrs Hall, you don't happen to have the phone number for the Danby farm? 804 00:42:37,240 --> 00:42:38,960 JIMMY FUSSES 805 00:42:41,080 --> 00:42:43,920 Thanks for being so understanding about this, Tris. 806 00:42:43,960 --> 00:42:46,600 Helen? 'Ey, I'd love a night off. 807 00:42:46,640 --> 00:42:48,440 You'll be all right with Jimmy, won't you? 808 00:42:48,480 --> 00:42:49,920 I suppose I'll have to be! 809 00:42:49,960 --> 00:42:51,720 Have a good time. TRISTAN LAUGHS 810 00:42:53,120 --> 00:42:56,600 Right, Jimmy. Do you like your new playpen? 811 00:43:01,040 --> 00:43:03,000 JAMES LAUGHS, JIMMY GIGGLES 812 00:43:03,040 --> 00:43:04,840 Thank you. 813 00:43:04,880 --> 00:43:06,080 UNCRADLES PHONE 814 00:43:07,440 --> 00:43:09,840 PHONE DIAL WHIRS 815 00:43:14,000 --> 00:43:16,360 Come here. JIMMY FUSSES 816 00:43:16,400 --> 00:43:17,680 Hello, Doris? 817 00:43:17,720 --> 00:43:20,600 It's Mister Carmody. Richard. 818 00:43:20,640 --> 00:43:22,160 That's him, me. 819 00:43:22,200 --> 00:43:24,720 I'm Richard Carmody. I'm a vet... 820 00:43:24,760 --> 00:43:26,440 for animals. 821 00:43:27,480 --> 00:43:29,440 Anyhow... 822 00:43:30,720 --> 00:43:33,640 ..we were all about to go to the Drovers, have a drink. 823 00:43:35,080 --> 00:43:37,000 If you'd join us... 824 00:43:37,040 --> 00:43:38,680 it would be excellent to see you there. 825 00:43:39,760 --> 00:43:40,880 Yes? 826 00:43:42,000 --> 00:43:44,920 Well, in about half an hour, then. 827 00:43:44,960 --> 00:43:47,040 Goodbye. CRADLES PHONE 828 00:43:48,920 --> 00:43:50,360 You're coming to the capital. 829 00:43:51,480 --> 00:43:55,200 It'll just be you, me and the big city. 830 00:43:55,240 --> 00:43:58,520 Ready for a new palette of sniffs? Of course you are. 831 00:43:58,560 --> 00:44:00,960 HE INHALES, EXHALES DEEPLY 832 00:44:03,320 --> 00:44:04,480 Drovers? 833 00:44:06,040 --> 00:44:07,240 Shall we? 834 00:44:08,600 --> 00:44:09,680 Super. 835 00:44:11,040 --> 00:44:14,080 Oh, and Doris has promised to join us. 836 00:44:16,200 --> 00:44:17,560 New book? 837 00:44:17,600 --> 00:44:20,880 Oh, just something I picked up about Ancient Persia. 838 00:44:20,920 --> 00:44:22,240 It's quite a tome. 839 00:44:25,960 --> 00:44:27,800 Remember when he first arrived? 840 00:44:29,000 --> 00:44:31,440 The boy didn't know a thing. Now look at him. 841 00:44:31,480 --> 00:44:32,920 Doors and everything. 842 00:44:35,280 --> 00:44:36,640 SHE CHUCKLES 843 00:44:38,760 --> 00:44:43,200 Well, this is jolly. All of us celebrating together. 844 00:44:44,560 --> 00:44:46,560 Oh, don't mind me, Siegfried 845 00:44:48,160 --> 00:44:49,680 Don't mind us. 846 00:44:49,720 --> 00:44:52,120 JAMES GASPS, JIMMY SQUEALS 62033

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