Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:03,400
TABLET: OK, guys, Intimacy Week's
coming up.
2
00:00:03,400 --> 00:00:04,640
How do you feel about that?
3
00:00:04,640 --> 00:00:06,320
Is that you in in bed for
the rest of the day now, is it?
4
00:00:06,320 --> 00:00:07,560
Are you having a breakdown? Ha.
5
00:00:07,560 --> 00:00:08,800
Oh, no, it's not that
6
00:00:08,800 --> 00:00:12,000
Married at First Sight Australia
horseshit again?
7
00:00:12,000 --> 00:00:15,320
Oh, two people looking for love
is horseshit, is it?
8
00:00:15,320 --> 00:00:16,840
They're not looking for love.
9
00:00:16,840 --> 00:00:19,800
They're looking for fame so they
can sell sunglasses on TikTok,
10
00:00:19,800 --> 00:00:21,880
as if getting married
wasn't tacky enough.
11
00:00:21,880 --> 00:00:24,040
Bloody hell, he doesn't
even like weddings now!
12
00:00:24,040 --> 00:00:25,440
Get yourself in debt
13
00:00:25,440 --> 00:00:27,640
so you can pretend to your friends
you live in a fairy tale? You knobs.
14
00:00:27,640 --> 00:00:29,840
Oh, you cynical old man!
15
00:00:29,840 --> 00:00:31,000
What job is it anyway?
16
00:00:31,000 --> 00:00:33,400
Weirdly, it's an actual wedding,
down near Wolves.
17
00:00:33,400 --> 00:00:35,680
Well, you tell that couple
from me to
18
00:00:35,680 --> 00:00:38,520
"cherish every single moment
they're together
19
00:00:38,520 --> 00:00:40,720
"cos that's what soulmates do."
20
00:00:40,720 --> 00:00:41,840
What?!
21
00:00:41,840 --> 00:00:45,600
It's what Cheryl's just said
to Digga in episode one. Aww!
22
00:00:45,600 --> 00:00:48,680
Yep, weddings.
Meaningless sentiment.
23
00:00:48,680 --> 00:00:50,040
See you later.
24
00:01:15,840 --> 00:01:17,880
CHATTER
25
00:01:26,800 --> 00:01:28,840
All right, Wicky? All right, Jack?
26
00:01:28,840 --> 00:01:30,080
What happened?
27
00:01:30,080 --> 00:01:33,160
Mad one. So, wedding reception's
about to start,
28
00:01:33,160 --> 00:01:34,920
some bloke in a balaclava comes in,
29
00:01:34,920 --> 00:01:36,960
smacks one of the guests round
the head with a baseball bat.
30
00:01:36,960 --> 00:01:38,760
Bloody hell! Dead?
31
00:01:38,760 --> 00:01:40,880
Nah, he'll have a bloody headache
though.
32
00:01:40,880 --> 00:01:42,280
Ketchup all over the shop.
33
00:01:42,280 --> 00:01:43,640
One of the guests tackled him,
34
00:01:43,640 --> 00:01:46,160
so we've got the toerag in custody,
but he won't talk.
35
00:01:46,160 --> 00:01:47,560
Just letting them get on with it.
36
00:01:47,560 --> 00:01:48,880
Get on with what?
37
00:01:48,880 --> 00:01:50,920
Father of the bride wants to
carry on with the reception.
38
00:01:50,920 --> 00:01:53,320
Eh?! You'll see when you meet him.
39
00:01:53,320 --> 00:01:54,360
Legend.
40
00:01:54,360 --> 00:01:55,440
Ah.
41
00:01:55,440 --> 00:01:58,360
Where's Ruth? She's at home,
watching some reality shit.
42
00:01:58,360 --> 00:02:00,480
About time you made
an honest woman of her, innit?
43
00:02:00,480 --> 00:02:03,560
Eh? Shut up!
Why would we want all this nonsense?
44
00:02:03,560 --> 00:02:05,640
All women want to get married,
Wicky.
45
00:02:05,640 --> 00:02:07,480
They want to have
their princess day.
46
00:02:07,480 --> 00:02:09,800
Jesus, Jack, you can't say that
sort of thing any more, mate.
47
00:02:09,800 --> 00:02:11,880
You'll get cancelled. You'll have
to go and work in Nando's.
48
00:02:11,880 --> 00:02:14,240
I didn't say it. Lorraine Kelly did.
49
00:02:18,280 --> 00:02:19,880
Why are you watching Lorraine?
50
00:02:21,280 --> 00:02:22,520
Personal choice.
51
00:02:24,520 --> 00:02:26,560
Here we go!
52
00:02:26,560 --> 00:02:28,320
Legend alert!
53
00:02:28,320 --> 00:02:29,680
The cavalry arrives!
54
00:02:29,680 --> 00:02:30,800
Not before time, son.
55
00:02:30,800 --> 00:02:33,440
We've got a bloody big train
to get back on the tracks here.
56
00:02:33,440 --> 00:02:35,040
Right, go on.
57
00:02:36,720 --> 00:02:38,080
Sorry, I don't...
58
00:02:38,080 --> 00:02:39,680
He knows. Course he knows!
59
00:02:39,680 --> 00:02:41,000
Come on.
60
00:02:41,000 --> 00:02:42,360
I... I really don't...
61
00:02:42,360 --> 00:02:44,360
Just sing the song
if you want, mate.
62
00:02:44,360 --> 00:02:46,320
Song?
63
00:02:46,320 --> 00:02:49,400
# Bob Mammot, the King of Storage
64
00:02:49,400 --> 00:02:52,760
# If storage is your thing
Bob Mammot's your king!
65
00:02:52,760 --> 00:02:55,520
# Ra-ra! Ra-ra! #
66
00:03:02,280 --> 00:03:03,920
He knows, he's just being polite.
67
00:03:03,920 --> 00:03:06,120
Right, kid, this is for you.
68
00:03:06,120 --> 00:03:07,800
Oh, we're not allowed, Bob.
69
00:03:07,800 --> 00:03:10,160
Hey, hey, you know,
you've been as good as gold
70
00:03:10,160 --> 00:03:12,200
and we could do without all this
getting in the press, you know.
71
00:03:12,200 --> 00:03:15,280
And you're going to keep it
on the downlow, yeah? Take it.
72
00:03:16,240 --> 00:03:17,280
Cheers, Bob.
73
00:03:17,280 --> 00:03:19,200
I'll have a vape in the panda,
make sure you're not disturbed.
74
00:03:19,200 --> 00:03:20,400
Right.
75
00:03:22,240 --> 00:03:24,440
Wicky. Wicky.
76
00:03:24,440 --> 00:03:25,960
Here's me hand, right?
77
00:03:25,960 --> 00:03:27,120
Here's me heart.
78
00:03:28,360 --> 00:03:31,200
Now, I've heard you're
the best in the business.
79
00:03:31,200 --> 00:03:33,480
I'm going to need you to perform
some miracles here, son.
80
00:03:35,360 --> 00:03:36,760
Come this way.
81
00:03:41,800 --> 00:03:44,360
So what was the attack
all about, then?
82
00:03:44,360 --> 00:03:45,800
Total mystery.
83
00:03:45,800 --> 00:03:47,520
Professional jealousy, probably.
84
00:03:47,520 --> 00:03:50,160
Oh, yeah? A lot of that in
the storage world, is there?
85
00:03:50,160 --> 00:03:54,280
Yeah. Who else has facilities in
Stourbridge, Dudley and West Brom?
86
00:03:54,280 --> 00:03:55,840
No-one! Oh!
87
00:03:55,840 --> 00:03:58,440
And it's going to take more than
a hoodie swinging his dick around
88
00:03:58,440 --> 00:04:00,600
to derail a Mammot wedding.
89
00:04:00,600 --> 00:04:02,240
Thought he was swinging
a baseball bat round?
90
00:04:02,240 --> 00:04:05,040
Hey, have a bit of respect, kid.
A man was hurt.
91
00:04:05,040 --> 00:04:06,360
Sorry.
92
00:04:06,360 --> 00:04:08,920
Hey, Dave, there's canapes
and fizz in there, son.
93
00:04:08,920 --> 00:04:12,040
Give your missus a break
from the prosecco.
94
00:04:12,040 --> 00:04:13,720
Cheap twot.
95
00:04:13,720 --> 00:04:16,640
Right, you need to get a wriggle on.
96
00:04:16,640 --> 00:04:18,480
Keep this on the downlow.
97
00:04:19,880 --> 00:04:22,840
Jasper Carrott's going to be
here in a minute.
98
00:04:22,840 --> 00:04:24,480
Right.
99
00:04:24,480 --> 00:04:25,680
Master of ceremonies.
100
00:04:25,680 --> 00:04:27,160
Ah.
101
00:04:27,160 --> 00:04:28,600
Thought he'd retired.
102
00:04:28,600 --> 00:04:30,000
HE thought he had...
103
00:04:30,000 --> 00:04:32,560
..until he saw how many zeros
were on the end of the cheque.
104
00:04:32,560 --> 00:04:34,280
Three. Ah!
105
00:04:34,280 --> 00:04:35,600
With a four in front.
106
00:04:37,280 --> 00:04:39,720
Four grand. Four grand, yeah. Yeah.
107
00:04:39,720 --> 00:04:42,960
Also, I hurt my wrist
writing one out for UB40 -
108
00:04:42,960 --> 00:04:44,400
featuring Ali Campbell.
109
00:04:44,400 --> 00:04:45,960
Oh, right.
110
00:04:45,960 --> 00:04:47,680
Are they going to play Red Red Wine?
111
00:04:47,680 --> 00:04:49,360
Well, we're not going to
have the first dance to
112
00:04:49,360 --> 00:04:50,840
Rat In Mi Kitchen are we, you plum?
113
00:04:50,840 --> 00:04:52,240
Any more stupid questions?
114
00:04:53,440 --> 00:04:54,920
Yeah, one.
115
00:04:54,920 --> 00:04:56,920
Who was it who got hit?
116
00:04:58,360 --> 00:04:59,600
It was me dad!
117
00:05:01,000 --> 00:05:02,480
Oh, God, I'm sorry. I...
118
00:05:02,480 --> 00:05:04,080
Who would want to hurt your dad?
119
00:05:06,160 --> 00:05:08,240
We built this empire together.
120
00:05:08,240 --> 00:05:10,360
Me and me dad are the biggest
storage providers
121
00:05:10,360 --> 00:05:11,640
in the Black Country.
122
00:05:11,640 --> 00:05:14,400
Maybe it was cutting the head off
the storage snake.
123
00:05:15,680 --> 00:05:17,880
He's my rock, Wicky. My rock.
124
00:05:19,240 --> 00:05:22,080
They wouldn't lie and say
he wasn't OK if he wasn't OK,
125
00:05:22,080 --> 00:05:23,880
they wouldn't do that,
would they, Wicky?!
126
00:05:23,880 --> 00:05:27,200
No, I'm sure if they said
he'll be fine, he'll be fine.
127
00:05:27,200 --> 00:05:28,240
Yeah.
128
00:05:29,720 --> 00:05:31,600
You're a good man, Wicky.
129
00:05:31,600 --> 00:05:33,360
I can see that.
130
00:05:33,360 --> 00:05:34,800
I won't forget this.
131
00:05:38,040 --> 00:05:40,520
I mean, do you even know
your inside leg measurement?
132
00:05:40,520 --> 00:05:43,040
What about this, then? All right?
Yeah, it's nice.
133
00:05:43,040 --> 00:05:45,840
Oh, here he is, my worst half!
134
00:05:45,840 --> 00:05:47,240
Hello! Hello!
135
00:05:50,760 --> 00:05:52,760
You're not going to believe this,
Bob, I just caught
136
00:05:52,760 --> 00:05:57,160
the Right Honourable David Quince MP
trying to sneak out!
137
00:05:57,160 --> 00:05:59,120
Oh, yeah, you're not
going anywhere, sir. Well...
138
00:05:59,120 --> 00:06:01,520
Let's get you a drink.
I think I've had quite enough.
139
00:06:01,520 --> 00:06:02,600
Oh, he says he's had enough.
140
00:06:02,600 --> 00:06:04,760
We'd never live it down, would we?!
141
00:06:04,760 --> 00:06:07,920
"MP seen leaving Mammot
wedding sober."
142
00:06:09,880 --> 00:06:12,560
No? No, thank you, to that headline.
143
00:06:12,560 --> 00:06:15,240
I think in the circumstances
it would be best I left.
144
00:06:15,240 --> 00:06:17,960
I think the press might see it
as a...
145
00:06:17,960 --> 00:06:21,360
David! I will not have you leave
the wedding of the year!
146
00:06:21,360 --> 00:06:24,720
And there's no press coming - other
than the ones I've paid for.
147
00:06:24,720 --> 00:06:27,480
Got a double-page shoot in the...
BOTH: West Midlands Now.
148
00:06:27,480 --> 00:06:29,080
Yeah, and we've got this big
lad here,
149
00:06:29,080 --> 00:06:30,400
he's going to clear up the mess.
150
00:06:30,400 --> 00:06:32,400
All right? We've met before.
151
00:06:32,400 --> 00:06:34,200
I doubt it, I doubt that very much.
152
00:06:34,200 --> 00:06:36,800
Now, David, I would love to talk you
through the wedding menu...
153
00:06:36,800 --> 00:06:38,080
We have met before.
154
00:06:38,080 --> 00:06:40,440
Do you remember? you came down
my local pub for a photo shoot
155
00:06:40,440 --> 00:06:41,760
during the election.
156
00:06:41,760 --> 00:06:43,840
Not seen you since, though.
Typical politician.
157
00:06:43,840 --> 00:06:48,360
I imagine a politician is a bit busy
to sip pints with a cleaner.
158
00:06:48,360 --> 00:06:49,640
Crime scene cleaner.
159
00:06:49,640 --> 00:06:52,360
Hey, don't worry about that pint
that you left by the way.
160
00:06:52,360 --> 00:06:54,320
My mate Weasel mine-swept it.
161
00:06:54,320 --> 00:06:56,040
He's not bought a drink in 12 years,
162
00:06:56,040 --> 00:06:57,920
not bad for a functioning alcoholic.
163
00:06:57,920 --> 00:06:59,320
I say functioning,
164
00:06:59,320 --> 00:07:00,600
he shat himself.
165
00:07:00,600 --> 00:07:03,040
David, would you excuse me
for a moment
166
00:07:03,040 --> 00:07:04,560
while I handle this gentleman?
167
00:07:04,560 --> 00:07:05,640
Wicky.
168
00:07:05,640 --> 00:07:08,960
I shall show "the cleaner"
to where he is needed.
169
00:07:08,960 --> 00:07:10,360
Don't let him leave!
170
00:07:11,320 --> 00:07:13,280
Right, OK, so,
171
00:07:13,280 --> 00:07:15,600
get chugging on that, David.
Ooh, er...
172
00:07:15,600 --> 00:07:16,960
Hey. Oh!
173
00:07:16,960 --> 00:07:19,480
Sorry, but am I not cleaning
this first?
174
00:07:19,480 --> 00:07:21,040
Oh, sorry.
175
00:07:21,040 --> 00:07:23,440
Just thought it might be nice to
get the blood off
176
00:07:23,440 --> 00:07:25,560
my daughter's
23-grand wedding dress first!
177
00:07:27,080 --> 00:07:28,320
Come!
178
00:07:28,320 --> 00:07:31,360
It's quality that,
it's been soaked in oak or summat!
179
00:07:37,800 --> 00:07:39,280
SOBBING
180
00:07:41,960 --> 00:07:44,560
Mum! How is he?
Is he going to be OK?
181
00:07:44,560 --> 00:07:46,280
Who? Grandad, of course!
182
00:07:46,280 --> 00:07:49,960
He's fine! You just focus on being
the perfect bride.
183
00:07:49,960 --> 00:07:51,920
Get her slap sorted, Tara.
184
00:07:51,920 --> 00:07:53,800
It's a disaster.
185
00:07:53,800 --> 00:07:55,200
Look at me!
186
00:07:55,200 --> 00:07:56,880
Oh, you look gorgeous, Anne-Marie.
187
00:07:56,880 --> 00:07:59,320
Why would anyone want to hurt
Grandad?
188
00:07:59,320 --> 00:08:01,120
Tell her she looks like an angel,
Ravi.
189
00:08:01,120 --> 00:08:02,320
You do, you look well fit.
190
00:08:02,320 --> 00:08:03,840
Like an angel! Like an angel, yeah.
191
00:08:03,840 --> 00:08:07,160
There you go. Thank God this one
was here to tackle the little shit.
192
00:08:07,160 --> 00:08:09,040
We owe you, Ravi, don't we,
Anne-Marie?
193
00:08:09,040 --> 00:08:10,280
Yeah, thanks, Rav.
194
00:08:10,280 --> 00:08:11,520
Anything for you.
195
00:08:11,520 --> 00:08:13,600
You was a hero, Ravi.
196
00:08:13,600 --> 00:08:15,960
Like a Brummie Jason Statham.
197
00:08:15,960 --> 00:08:17,320
GIGGLING
198
00:08:17,320 --> 00:08:19,920
Hey, you're Ravi Singh?!
199
00:08:19,920 --> 00:08:21,760
Yeah. That's mad!
200
00:08:21,760 --> 00:08:24,120
I saw you score
against Brentford this season!
201
00:08:24,120 --> 00:08:25,480
Yeah,
that was a good goal, that.
202
00:08:25,480 --> 00:08:27,360
Hey, congratulations, by the way.
203
00:08:27,360 --> 00:08:29,560
Ta.
Oi, Cleaning Tower of Pisa,
204
00:08:29,560 --> 00:08:31,080
you're not here to spot celebrities.
205
00:08:31,080 --> 00:08:32,200
There's a bride there.
206
00:08:32,200 --> 00:08:33,720
Yeah, all right, I was just...
207
00:08:33,720 --> 00:08:35,240
I'm surprised to see him.
208
00:08:37,160 --> 00:08:38,200
How you doing? You all right?
209
00:08:38,200 --> 00:08:40,200
Never mind the therapy,
get that muck off her veil!
210
00:08:40,200 --> 00:08:41,600
Can you get it off?
211
00:08:41,600 --> 00:08:43,240
Hey, do bears shit in the woods?
212
00:08:43,240 --> 00:08:45,800
Oh! You show some respect.
213
00:08:45,800 --> 00:08:47,640
It's my little girl's wedding day.
214
00:08:47,640 --> 00:08:49,680
Fucking bears shitting in the woods.
215
00:08:49,680 --> 00:08:52,320
Hey, Tara, hoick them jugs up.
216
00:08:52,320 --> 00:08:54,040
We need a bit of glamour in
the photos.
217
00:08:54,040 --> 00:08:55,760
Give it here, I'll go and soak it
for you.
218
00:08:55,760 --> 00:08:57,920
Oh, I'll get a picture for Insta,
babe.
219
00:08:57,920 --> 00:08:59,240
Not when I look like this!
220
00:08:59,240 --> 00:09:02,120
Yeah, maybe let me clean her up
first, eh, girls?
221
00:09:03,440 --> 00:09:05,440
I think maybe we just cancel
it all, Mum.
222
00:09:05,440 --> 00:09:07,760
What? Are you a Mammot or a mouse?
223
00:09:07,760 --> 00:09:11,320
Cancel? Have you any idea
how much all of this cost?
224
00:09:11,320 --> 00:09:13,880
You think Jasper Carrott,
Ali Campbell
225
00:09:13,880 --> 00:09:15,720
and Noddy Holder are free?!
226
00:09:15,720 --> 00:09:18,720
I told you,
I don't know who they are!
227
00:09:18,720 --> 00:09:20,400
Who's all this for?
228
00:09:20,400 --> 00:09:21,600
So ungrateful.
229
00:09:21,600 --> 00:09:22,840
For you, my girl.
230
00:09:22,840 --> 00:09:26,040
To make you
the bride of the fucking century!
231
00:09:26,040 --> 00:09:27,640
Can we go and see Grandad?
232
00:09:27,640 --> 00:09:30,240
What for? He's off his nut on
morphine.
233
00:09:30,240 --> 00:09:34,560
We have got a schedule as tight
as a gnat's chuff, my girl.
234
00:09:34,560 --> 00:09:36,200
You stay focused.
235
00:09:37,480 --> 00:09:40,120
I spoke to your dad before,
he said he's going to be fine.
236
00:09:40,120 --> 00:09:41,480
Your grandad, I mean.
237
00:09:41,480 --> 00:09:43,000
And he's an old comedian.
238
00:09:43,000 --> 00:09:44,880
He had a hit about a funky moped.
239
00:09:44,880 --> 00:09:46,280
Jasper Carrott.
240
00:09:46,280 --> 00:09:48,960
It's less relevant. I should have
bailed at the grandad fact.
241
00:09:48,960 --> 00:09:51,320
Bollocks, we're supposed to be
throwing the bouquet!
242
00:09:51,320 --> 00:09:53,160
Come on, girls,
the photographer's on the clock.
243
00:09:53,160 --> 00:09:54,240
She don't need a veil
244
00:09:54,240 --> 00:09:56,480
to throw a bunch of flowers
over her fucking shoulder.
245
00:09:57,480 --> 00:09:59,280
I just wanted a normal wedding!
246
00:09:59,280 --> 00:10:01,520
Mammots are not normal.
247
00:10:01,520 --> 00:10:04,200
Ravi, love, do you mind helping
Bob move the cake?
248
00:10:04,200 --> 00:10:06,440
No problem, Mrs M.
249
00:10:07,360 --> 00:10:08,720
Cheer up, Anne-Marie.
250
00:10:08,720 --> 00:10:10,200
You look... Like an angel.
251
00:10:10,200 --> 00:10:12,960
Yeah, like an angel.
252
00:10:15,440 --> 00:10:17,120
Right, come on, you lot, photos.
253
00:10:17,120 --> 00:10:18,520
Tits and C.
254
00:10:19,720 --> 00:10:21,000
Charmer, isn't she?
255
00:10:21,000 --> 00:10:23,280
She might be the worst person
I've ever met
256
00:10:23,280 --> 00:10:25,760
and there was a lad in my town
who had sex with a magpie.
257
00:10:27,360 --> 00:10:28,840
They Wolves socks?
258
00:10:28,840 --> 00:10:30,120
Yeah. Yeah!
259
00:10:30,120 --> 00:10:31,720
You play with Ravi, do you?
260
00:10:31,720 --> 00:10:34,840
I used to, on the youth team,
but didn't make the cut.
261
00:10:34,840 --> 00:10:37,080
Aw, but you've stayed best mates?
That's nice.
262
00:10:37,080 --> 00:10:38,440
Yeah, I mean,
263
00:10:38,440 --> 00:10:40,680
don't see much of him now
that he's busy with the team, like.
264
00:10:40,680 --> 00:10:42,400
Ah, well, shit game anyway, innit?
265
00:10:42,400 --> 00:10:44,120
I only went to that match
because I had a spare ticket
266
00:10:44,120 --> 00:10:45,600
cos my mate fell into a septic tank.
267
00:10:45,600 --> 00:10:46,720
He what?
268
00:10:46,720 --> 00:10:48,800
I mean I say fell, he dived!
269
00:10:48,800 --> 00:10:50,560
He'd been on poppers for three days.
270
00:10:50,560 --> 00:10:51,920
What do you do now?
271
00:10:51,920 --> 00:10:53,720
Work for Bob, unfortunately.
272
00:10:53,720 --> 00:10:56,960
Ah, the power behind
the Storage King's throne, eh?
273
00:10:56,960 --> 00:10:58,520
Nightmare about this attack!
274
00:10:58,520 --> 00:11:00,920
Yeah, I mean I can't say it was
a massive shock, but...
275
00:11:00,920 --> 00:11:03,200
Yeah, he said something
about a jealous rival, is it?
276
00:11:04,280 --> 00:11:05,480
Is that what he told you?
277
00:11:05,480 --> 00:11:07,920
Oh! Why you know different, do you?
278
00:11:09,080 --> 00:11:10,200
Well....
279
00:11:10,200 --> 00:11:11,640
There you are, brain-ache.
280
00:11:11,640 --> 00:11:12,880
I've been looking for you
everywhere.
281
00:11:12,880 --> 00:11:14,240
DJ needs help setting up.
282
00:11:14,240 --> 00:11:15,360
Can't someone else do it?
283
00:11:15,360 --> 00:11:16,800
Can't someone else do it?
284
00:11:16,800 --> 00:11:19,040
You work for me, you bloody muppet.
285
00:11:19,040 --> 00:11:21,600
Even Ravi is helping out.
It's all hands to the pump.
286
00:11:21,600 --> 00:11:23,440
Bob, we should have a chat
about what's just happened.
287
00:11:23,440 --> 00:11:25,800
My boots will have a chat with
your ping pongs in a minute, son.
288
00:11:25,800 --> 00:11:27,200
Get!
289
00:11:28,800 --> 00:11:31,480
Bloody kids these days, eh, Wicky?
290
00:11:31,480 --> 00:11:34,240
Right, let's get me dad's
spooge off that cake.
291
00:11:35,760 --> 00:11:37,200
Love you, Dad.
292
00:11:37,200 --> 00:11:38,560
Stay strong.
293
00:11:43,360 --> 00:11:45,600
Thank you for your patience,
everybody.
294
00:11:45,600 --> 00:11:48,360
Please enjoy a glass
of vintage champagne...
295
00:11:48,360 --> 00:11:50,560
MICROPHONE FEEDBACK: ..courtesy of
the Storage King himself,
296
00:11:50,560 --> 00:11:52,160
Mr Bob Mammot.
297
00:11:55,080 --> 00:11:56,320
There you go, big man.
298
00:11:56,320 --> 00:11:57,960
Good lad. What do you think?
299
00:11:59,040 --> 00:12:01,680
Well, it's big.
"It's big", he says.
300
00:12:01,680 --> 00:12:04,680
That's four grand's worth of
cream sponge in there, mate.
301
00:12:04,680 --> 00:12:05,880
Who's that?
302
00:12:07,120 --> 00:12:09,800
Who do you fuckin' think?
It's the mug who paid for it!
303
00:12:09,800 --> 00:12:11,160
Well?
304
00:12:11,160 --> 00:12:12,400
Well, I can clean it, yeah,
305
00:12:12,400 --> 00:12:14,240
but the chemicals are
pretty toxic, you know.
306
00:12:14,240 --> 00:12:15,400
It's all right.
307
00:12:15,400 --> 00:12:17,720
Well...it's life-threatening.
308
00:12:17,720 --> 00:12:20,600
Doesn't know much about showbiz
this one, does he, Ravi?
309
00:12:20,600 --> 00:12:22,400
Nah. Yeah, right.
Show him your watch.
310
00:12:22,400 --> 00:12:23,440
Nah, you're all right.
311
00:12:23,440 --> 00:12:24,960
No, go on, show him your watch.
312
00:12:27,240 --> 00:12:28,800
Right, how much is that?
313
00:12:28,800 --> 00:12:30,640
I'm not really a watch guy, lads.
314
00:12:30,640 --> 00:12:32,640
Guess how much. How much?!
315
00:12:32,640 --> 00:12:34,040
Yeah, go on.
316
00:12:34,040 --> 00:12:35,080
3 million?
317
00:12:35,080 --> 00:12:36,960
3 fuckin' million?!
What are you talking about?
318
00:12:36,960 --> 00:12:38,800
Like I say, I'm not really
a watch guy.
319
00:12:38,800 --> 00:12:41,320
That's 80 grand's worth, that watch.
320
00:12:41,320 --> 00:12:42,400
80 grand!
321
00:12:42,400 --> 00:12:45,360
Now, did you have to spend that
to tell the time, Ravi?
322
00:12:45,360 --> 00:12:47,440
Yeah... Did you, Ravi?
323
00:12:47,440 --> 00:12:48,960
No!
324
00:12:48,960 --> 00:12:50,320
You don't.
325
00:12:50,320 --> 00:12:53,920
And you don't need to eat a cake
to be impressed by it.
326
00:12:53,920 --> 00:12:58,800
The function of this cake is
to wow the crowds before my...
327
00:12:58,800 --> 00:13:00,000
..before...
328
00:13:00,000 --> 00:13:01,840
..you know, the speeches.
329
00:13:01,840 --> 00:13:04,880
Right, see, lights down, right?
330
00:13:04,880 --> 00:13:07,640
Jasper comes out,
gives it the big 'un,
331
00:13:07,640 --> 00:13:11,000
then UB40 crank out Baby Come Back,
332
00:13:11,000 --> 00:13:13,480
then lights up...
333
00:13:13,480 --> 00:13:14,760
Cake.
334
00:13:14,760 --> 00:13:17,680
Wheeled out by a bloody Premiership
football player.
335
00:13:17,680 --> 00:13:21,040
And then I come out,
give it all the funnies!
336
00:13:21,040 --> 00:13:22,440
Legend!
337
00:13:22,440 --> 00:13:25,600
Too right I'm a legend,
come here, Ravi Singh.
338
00:13:25,600 --> 00:13:27,480
You're the son I never had, mate.
339
00:13:27,480 --> 00:13:29,480
I mean it. Do you understand that?
340
00:13:29,480 --> 00:13:33,360
I'm just thinking, Bob, right,
you're the legend of storage
341
00:13:33,360 --> 00:13:36,200
and I'm the legend of score-age.
342
00:13:37,920 --> 00:13:39,560
Fuck me, mate.
343
00:13:39,560 --> 00:13:40,880
Did you just come up with that?
344
00:13:40,880 --> 00:13:42,200
Yeah.
345
00:13:42,200 --> 00:13:44,600
Did you hear that?
He just came up with that.
346
00:13:44,600 --> 00:13:45,960
I'm going to open with that, mate.
347
00:13:45,960 --> 00:13:47,720
Can I have that? I mean it.
348
00:13:47,720 --> 00:13:49,120
That'll bring the ceiling down.
349
00:13:49,120 --> 00:13:52,040
Lads, just to be clear,
if I clean this cake
350
00:13:52,040 --> 00:13:54,960
and someone eats it,
they might die.
351
00:13:54,960 --> 00:13:56,440
Bob!
352
00:13:56,440 --> 00:13:59,400
That bastard MP's had it
on his toes again!
353
00:13:59,400 --> 00:14:01,240
We've got star-studded speeches.
354
00:14:01,240 --> 00:14:02,760
We can afford to lose an MP.
355
00:14:02,760 --> 00:14:04,560
No, I want him here.
356
00:14:04,560 --> 00:14:06,040
I told everyone he'd be here.
357
00:14:06,040 --> 00:14:08,000
Where's Anne-Marie?
Has she gone AWOL?
358
00:14:08,000 --> 00:14:09,600
Shithouse bride, that girl.
359
00:14:09,600 --> 00:14:13,520
Hey, Viv, it's our
daughter's big day. Come on.
360
00:14:13,520 --> 00:14:15,560
What's this bell doing here?
The floor isn't done.
361
00:14:15,560 --> 00:14:16,760
What are you doing here, you bell?
362
00:14:16,760 --> 00:14:18,720
Ravi, sweetheart,
will you please find Anne-Marie?
363
00:14:18,720 --> 00:14:19,760
She'll listen to you.
364
00:14:19,760 --> 00:14:21,920
Tell her she needs to be
working that courtyard.
365
00:14:21,920 --> 00:14:24,040
MP! NOW!
366
00:14:25,640 --> 00:14:26,920
So sorry, sir.
367
00:14:26,920 --> 00:14:29,360
Mr Carrott and Mr Campbell
are stuck in traffic.
368
00:14:31,560 --> 00:14:33,040
Shit, bollocks!
369
00:14:35,480 --> 00:14:36,800
Right...
370
00:14:36,800 --> 00:14:40,040
I'm going to phone
Jeff Lynne from ELO.
371
00:14:40,040 --> 00:14:41,120
Hey, Mr Blue Sky.
372
00:14:41,120 --> 00:14:43,000
That's right. No, it's Bob Mammot.
373
00:14:43,000 --> 00:14:44,480
Yeah, it is, Bob Mammot.
374
00:14:44,480 --> 00:14:46,040
Yeah, King of Storage.
375
00:14:46,040 --> 00:14:47,400
Oi.
376
00:14:47,400 --> 00:14:49,640
Does this not bug you a bit?
377
00:14:49,640 --> 00:14:50,840
What?
378
00:14:50,840 --> 00:14:53,280
Why's he on the cake?
It's your wedding!
379
00:14:53,280 --> 00:14:55,080
It's not. What?
380
00:14:55,080 --> 00:14:56,840
It's not my wedding. I'm best man.
381
00:14:58,920 --> 00:15:00,360
You seen Anne-Marie?
382
00:15:00,360 --> 00:15:02,240
You better watch that woman, son.
383
00:15:02,240 --> 00:15:04,240
Don't want to lose her on
the way home, do you, eh?
384
00:15:04,240 --> 00:15:06,000
Eh? Hey!
385
00:15:06,000 --> 00:15:08,200
Heeey! 1-nil! Ha-ha!
386
00:15:18,400 --> 00:15:19,800
You're the groom?!
387
00:15:28,640 --> 00:15:30,400
What are you doing out here?
388
00:15:30,400 --> 00:15:32,720
You should be cleaning up.
Vivien will go mad!
389
00:15:32,720 --> 00:15:36,480
If you're the groom, why's he got
you running round like some skivvy?
390
00:15:36,480 --> 00:15:39,120
Same reason he's made me buy
all this shit no-one needs -
391
00:15:39,120 --> 00:15:40,160
he's a boss.
392
00:15:41,240 --> 00:15:42,680
Look, the whole family are mad.
393
00:15:42,680 --> 00:15:44,360
Well, why are you marrying into it,
then?
394
00:15:44,360 --> 00:15:46,040
Because Anne-Marie is amazing.
395
00:15:46,040 --> 00:15:48,680
It's mad! You haven't even been
in the photos!
396
00:15:48,680 --> 00:15:50,560
Yeah, but I'm not a celebrity, am I?
397
00:15:50,560 --> 00:15:52,240
Why would they want a photo of me?
398
00:15:52,240 --> 00:15:54,800
Oh, no. No, no, this is no good.
399
00:15:54,800 --> 00:15:56,840
It's none of my business,
but this is your day.
400
00:15:56,840 --> 00:15:58,840
You have to do a
Janet Jackson here, mate.
401
00:15:58,840 --> 00:16:00,720
You're going to have
to take control.
402
00:16:02,560 --> 00:16:04,480
She's a singer.
403
00:16:04,480 --> 00:16:06,720
Had a series of hits
in the '80s and '90s?
404
00:16:06,720 --> 00:16:08,640
She whopped her bap out
at the Super Bowl!
405
00:16:08,640 --> 00:16:11,440
It doesn't matter who she is,
Manish! Focus!
406
00:16:11,440 --> 00:16:12,920
You know what? You're right.
407
00:16:14,720 --> 00:16:16,320
Thanks, Wicky.
408
00:16:16,320 --> 00:16:17,720
Don't thank me.
409
00:16:17,720 --> 00:16:18,880
Thank Janet Jackson.
410
00:16:20,160 --> 00:16:21,200
Now, go.
411
00:16:33,400 --> 00:16:35,080
Ah, mate, we've been
together for years,
412
00:16:35,080 --> 00:16:36,880
but I don't even know
what to say to her.
413
00:16:36,880 --> 00:16:42,480
Hey, all she needs is for you to
call her your wife, all right?
414
00:16:44,040 --> 00:16:46,880
Failing that - God forgive me -
play the grandad card.
415
00:16:48,240 --> 00:16:49,280
OK.
416
00:16:53,320 --> 00:16:55,160
Anne-Marie...
417
00:16:55,160 --> 00:16:57,680
What are you doing here?
Dad's looking for you.
418
00:16:57,680 --> 00:16:59,720
Yeah, but I've barely seen you
all day.
419
00:16:59,720 --> 00:17:02,480
Not even had a chance to call
you my wife yet.
420
00:17:02,480 --> 00:17:04,560
Sounds good, doesn't it? "Wife".
421
00:17:04,560 --> 00:17:06,720
Oh, don't be a melt, Manish.
422
00:17:06,720 --> 00:17:07,920
WHISPERS: Grandad!
423
00:17:07,920 --> 00:17:09,720
Listen, I was thinking maybe
we could go to the hospital
424
00:17:09,720 --> 00:17:10,880
and see how your grandad's doing.
425
00:17:10,880 --> 00:17:11,960
Eh?
426
00:17:12,960 --> 00:17:14,160
No, we can't, Mani.
427
00:17:14,160 --> 00:17:15,760
They're going mental.
428
00:17:15,760 --> 00:17:17,680
It's the photos, then the meal,
then the speeches.
429
00:17:17,680 --> 00:17:19,920
That's how it works.
Yeah, but this is OUR wedding day!
430
00:17:19,920 --> 00:17:21,560
We can do what we want.
431
00:17:21,560 --> 00:17:23,240
I know you'll feel better
if you see him.
432
00:17:24,720 --> 00:17:28,640
Now, this is none of my business
and it might not help,
433
00:17:28,640 --> 00:17:31,360
but if you want, I could cause
a distraction and you can go.
434
00:17:32,520 --> 00:17:34,560
I used to be able to do
the robot, something like...
435
00:17:36,160 --> 00:17:38,240
Actually, that won't help, but...
436
00:17:38,240 --> 00:17:39,680
..you can borrow my van.
437
00:17:39,680 --> 00:17:40,720
Cheers, Wicky.
438
00:17:40,720 --> 00:17:42,040
Well, well, well!
439
00:17:42,040 --> 00:17:44,160
This is a cosy love-in.
440
00:17:44,160 --> 00:17:45,960
Where have you two been?
441
00:17:45,960 --> 00:17:47,680
I was talking to Mani. Why?
442
00:17:47,680 --> 00:17:49,040
Because she's my wife.
443
00:17:49,040 --> 00:17:51,080
Ooh, lucky girl!
444
00:17:51,080 --> 00:17:53,880
But you two have got the rest
of your lives to talk shit.
445
00:17:53,880 --> 00:17:57,240
Meanwhile, your poor dad
is losing his mind.
446
00:17:57,240 --> 00:18:00,600
Carrott and Campbell are stuck
in traffic on the motorway.
447
00:18:00,600 --> 00:18:02,880
Ah... Coming together, are they?
That's a bit weird.
448
00:18:02,880 --> 00:18:04,200
Shut it, you!
449
00:18:04,200 --> 00:18:05,800
Now, I won't lie to you, Anne-Marie.
450
00:18:05,800 --> 00:18:08,720
You've let the family down -
God forgive me - and your poor
451
00:18:08,720 --> 00:18:10,600
grandfather would be ashamed.
452
00:18:10,600 --> 00:18:14,200
He's lying there in that hospital
bed with his brain smashed out
453
00:18:14,200 --> 00:18:16,600
while you two kiss and cuddle!
454
00:18:16,600 --> 00:18:18,880
That is an awful thing to say.
455
00:18:18,880 --> 00:18:20,800
Oh, tears again.
456
00:18:20,800 --> 00:18:24,160
Did the spoilt girl not get
everything she wanted?
457
00:18:24,160 --> 00:18:27,360
Did it ever occur to you that maybe
you're the one causing the stress?!
458
00:18:27,360 --> 00:18:30,160
Woo! Hello, big balls!
459
00:18:30,160 --> 00:18:32,440
Nah. You're not worthy
of this family.
460
00:18:32,440 --> 00:18:34,040
You know that, don't you?
461
00:18:34,040 --> 00:18:36,280
Bob just gave you
the job out of pity.
462
00:18:36,280 --> 00:18:40,280
You're just some failed footballer
our Anne-Marie took a shine to.
463
00:18:40,280 --> 00:18:42,640
Christ, I don't even know
why she chose you,
464
00:18:42,640 --> 00:18:46,320
especially when, well, you know...
465
00:18:46,320 --> 00:18:47,920
..there are other options.
466
00:18:54,840 --> 00:18:56,840
OK.
467
00:18:56,840 --> 00:18:58,240
I think it went quite well.
468
00:18:58,240 --> 00:19:00,200
Just leave it, man.
469
00:19:01,680 --> 00:19:03,040
She's right.
470
00:19:04,680 --> 00:19:06,200
Hey!
471
00:19:06,200 --> 00:19:07,760
You know something, don't you?
472
00:19:07,760 --> 00:19:09,520
You know why all this happened.
473
00:19:20,240 --> 00:19:22,240
Right, kid, tell the kitchen
to stall.
474
00:19:22,240 --> 00:19:24,160
Jeff Lynne's having his bathroom
fitted.
475
00:19:24,160 --> 00:19:26,480
He said he's going to move a few
things around and it should work,
476
00:19:26,480 --> 00:19:28,160
so he should be able to make it, OK?
477
00:19:28,160 --> 00:19:30,200
But the Chef said
the chicken will get dry.
478
00:19:30,200 --> 00:19:32,000
Well, tell him to rub butter
on it or something!
479
00:19:32,000 --> 00:19:34,400
It's not fucking rocket science! Go!
480
00:19:34,400 --> 00:19:37,840
OVER PA: Thank you for your
continued patience, everybody.
481
00:19:37,840 --> 00:19:40,640
Strap yourselves in, you're
going to have a cracking night.
482
00:19:40,640 --> 00:19:42,840
Just don't leave, please.
483
00:19:46,120 --> 00:19:48,520
Dunna suit you, crying, kid.
484
00:19:48,520 --> 00:19:50,200
Brought you this.
485
00:19:50,200 --> 00:19:51,280
I don't want it.
486
00:19:51,280 --> 00:19:52,680
Might make you feel better.
487
00:19:53,800 --> 00:19:55,920
I just wanted a normal wedding.
488
00:19:57,680 --> 00:19:59,400
Just me and him.
489
00:19:59,400 --> 00:20:01,880
You're worried about your grandad.
490
00:20:01,880 --> 00:20:05,440
Don't worry, I rang the hospital
for you. They say he's fine.
491
00:20:05,440 --> 00:20:06,560
Did you?
492
00:20:06,560 --> 00:20:07,920
Yeah.
493
00:20:07,920 --> 00:20:09,480
Ravi saves the day again, eh?
494
00:20:10,480 --> 00:20:12,200
Thank you. Course, yeah.
495
00:20:13,440 --> 00:20:16,480
Come on, kid. No more tears.
496
00:20:19,200 --> 00:20:21,800
It was always meant
to be me and you.
497
00:20:21,800 --> 00:20:22,840
What?
498
00:20:22,840 --> 00:20:24,840
Come on. Ravi, what the fuck?
499
00:20:24,840 --> 00:20:27,320
Come on, babes, I know you love me.
500
00:20:27,320 --> 00:20:28,840
Anne-Marie.
501
00:20:28,840 --> 00:20:30,600
I knew it.
502
00:20:30,600 --> 00:20:32,720
Mani, no.
503
00:20:32,720 --> 00:20:33,960
Manish! No!
504
00:20:35,120 --> 00:20:37,520
That goal came off your ankle
anyway, you knob!
505
00:20:42,280 --> 00:20:43,400
It didn't.
506
00:20:46,760 --> 00:20:48,880
Manish!
507
00:20:46,760 --> 00:20:48,880
HE WHEEZES
508
00:20:48,880 --> 00:20:50,600
Don't make me run any more, mate.
509
00:20:50,600 --> 00:20:51,880
I'm clinically obese.
510
00:20:53,400 --> 00:20:54,600
I don't look it, but I am.
511
00:20:54,600 --> 00:20:58,040
I get away with it cos I'm tall,
but it's...it's all here.
512
00:20:58,040 --> 00:20:59,560
Belly fat.
513
00:20:59,560 --> 00:21:00,840
It's the dangerous kind.
514
00:21:00,840 --> 00:21:03,280
Just forget it, Wicky.
They got what they wanted.
515
00:21:03,280 --> 00:21:06,400
No, nothing happened. I saw it.
516
00:21:06,400 --> 00:21:07,800
She turned him down.
517
00:21:08,800 --> 00:21:10,400
Yeah, but I don't fit in.
518
00:21:10,400 --> 00:21:12,040
You've seen it yourself.
519
00:21:12,040 --> 00:21:14,000
No, neither of you do.
520
00:21:15,360 --> 00:21:16,720
That's why you've got to tell her.
521
00:21:17,680 --> 00:21:18,840
OK.
522
00:21:20,640 --> 00:21:22,720
Let's do it. Let's.
523
00:21:25,760 --> 00:21:28,000
Oh, this is mad.
I'm just going to go.
524
00:21:28,000 --> 00:21:29,280
Hey.
525
00:21:29,280 --> 00:21:30,720
Weddings are meaningless...
526
00:21:31,840 --> 00:21:34,760
..but I know when two people
are right, OK?
527
00:21:36,040 --> 00:21:37,080
Thanks, Wicky.
528
00:21:37,080 --> 00:21:38,840
DISTANT MOVEMENT
529
00:21:38,840 --> 00:21:41,480
MAN AND WOMAN PANT
530
00:21:43,840 --> 00:21:45,320
Anne-Marie?
531
00:21:47,600 --> 00:21:50,160
Yeah, fair play,
I wasn't expecting that.
532
00:21:50,160 --> 00:21:52,480
Now, I may have read
this quite badly, Manish.
533
00:21:52,480 --> 00:21:54,640
I'm... I'm not too proud
to admit that to you, mate.
534
00:21:56,080 --> 00:21:57,520
Well, don't go in there!
535
00:21:57,520 --> 00:21:58,560
Manish!
536
00:21:58,560 --> 00:22:01,200
I knew I'd get you to stay
somehow, David.
537
00:22:01,200 --> 00:22:03,560
I don't want to go home! Ugh!
538
00:22:03,560 --> 00:22:05,280
Nearly there, love.
539
00:22:05,280 --> 00:22:06,880
You're polling well.
540
00:22:06,880 --> 00:22:08,160
HE GROANS
541
00:22:08,160 --> 00:22:09,640
Get in there!
542
00:22:10,800 --> 00:22:11,840
Hello.
543
00:22:13,560 --> 00:22:14,880
Ah...
544
00:22:14,880 --> 00:22:16,800
David, get out, lad.
545
00:22:16,800 --> 00:22:18,080
HE SIGHS
546
00:22:18,080 --> 00:22:19,560
Come on. Yeah.
547
00:22:25,000 --> 00:22:29,080
When people say to me,
"Why storage?"
548
00:22:29,080 --> 00:22:32,760
I say, "Because every kingdom
needs a king."
549
00:22:32,760 --> 00:22:35,000
The plains of Africa have the lion
550
00:22:35,000 --> 00:22:38,480
and the leading storage solution
of Wolverhampton...
551
00:22:38,480 --> 00:22:40,720
..have Bob Mammot!
552
00:22:38,480 --> 00:22:40,720
FOOTSTEPS APPROACH
553
00:22:40,720 --> 00:22:42,080
Dad, have you seen Mani?
554
00:22:42,080 --> 00:22:43,840
No! No, I haven't seen him!
555
00:22:43,840 --> 00:22:45,080
I'm not the boy's keeper.
556
00:22:45,080 --> 00:22:46,880
I have to do all the bloody work
for him as it is.
557
00:22:46,880 --> 00:22:48,280
No, you don't.
558
00:22:48,280 --> 00:22:51,040
I'm the only one that knows what's
going on in your stupid business.
559
00:22:51,040 --> 00:22:52,360
Uh-oh!
560
00:22:52,360 --> 00:22:54,960
Shut up! What the fuck
are you talking about?
561
00:22:54,960 --> 00:22:57,800
Mani... You are not going
to believe this, Bob.
562
00:22:57,800 --> 00:23:03,160
Them two burst in when I was helping
David get ready for the speeches.
563
00:23:03,160 --> 00:23:05,680
God knows what he's thinking now.
564
00:23:05,680 --> 00:23:09,360
He was a debt collector,
the bloke with the baseball bat.
565
00:23:09,360 --> 00:23:10,560
Fuck off, was he.
566
00:23:10,560 --> 00:23:12,560
He was, Anne-Marie.
567
00:23:12,560 --> 00:23:14,760
Your dad's run the business
into the ground.
568
00:23:14,760 --> 00:23:16,120
I should know - I do the accounts.
569
00:23:16,120 --> 00:23:18,040
HE GROWLS
570
00:23:18,040 --> 00:23:19,600
Ooh!
571
00:23:19,600 --> 00:23:21,720
He's been borrowing left, right
and centre
572
00:23:21,720 --> 00:23:23,080
to pay for this wedding...
573
00:23:23,080 --> 00:23:24,400
..from dodgy people.
574
00:23:24,400 --> 00:23:26,680
What? Dad?
575
00:23:26,680 --> 00:23:29,240
Now do you see who you married,
my girl?
576
00:23:29,240 --> 00:23:31,200
He's a little liar.
577
00:23:31,200 --> 00:23:32,360
Tell her, Bob.
578
00:23:33,520 --> 00:23:35,560
HE MOANS
579
00:23:35,560 --> 00:23:38,520
Bob, tell her!
580
00:23:38,520 --> 00:23:40,600
Don't look at me.
581
00:23:41,800 --> 00:23:43,120
I'm busted.
582
00:23:43,120 --> 00:23:44,160
Bob!
583
00:23:45,200 --> 00:23:46,800
Aaaargh!
584
00:23:47,760 --> 00:23:49,440
THEY GASP
585
00:23:49,440 --> 00:23:50,480
Ooh!
586
00:23:50,480 --> 00:23:53,400
He's right. We're on our arse.
587
00:23:54,600 --> 00:23:56,640
Forgive me, Dad! Argh!
588
00:23:56,640 --> 00:23:58,440
I did this for you, Anne-Marie!
589
00:23:58,440 --> 00:23:59,880
What have you done?!
590
00:23:59,880 --> 00:24:02,000
You bloody bastard!
591
00:24:02,000 --> 00:24:03,880
I hate you!
592
00:24:03,880 --> 00:24:05,880
I want a divorce!
593
00:24:05,880 --> 00:24:07,640
I don't want to be poor!
594
00:24:07,640 --> 00:24:09,160
I'm supposed to be rich!
595
00:24:10,320 --> 00:24:11,960
No way is that fresh cream.
596
00:24:11,960 --> 00:24:13,640
I don't know...
597
00:24:13,640 --> 00:24:16,560
I don't know who I am any more!
598
00:24:17,800 --> 00:24:20,280
You're Bob Mammot!
You're Bob Mammot!
599
00:24:20,280 --> 00:24:22,240
Bob! Bob!
600
00:24:22,240 --> 00:24:23,880
You are the Storage King!
601
00:24:23,880 --> 00:24:26,040
Who's the fucking Storage King?!
602
00:24:26,040 --> 00:24:27,280
Yes, love?
603
00:24:27,280 --> 00:24:29,760
Er, sorry to interrupt, Mr Mammot,
604
00:24:29,760 --> 00:24:32,280
but...Jeff Lynne just pulled out.
605
00:24:32,280 --> 00:24:35,240
Aaaaaaaargh!
606
00:24:35,240 --> 00:24:36,520
Let's go to the hospital.
607
00:24:38,800 --> 00:24:42,280
BOB AND VIVIEN GROAN AND SOB
608
00:24:46,640 --> 00:24:47,840
I'll get my mop.
609
00:24:49,400 --> 00:24:52,720
OVER PA: Could all guests leave
the premises immediately.
610
00:24:52,720 --> 00:24:55,560
This event is cancelled.
611
00:24:55,560 --> 00:24:56,680
Yeah, yeah, get the face out.
612
00:24:56,680 --> 00:24:58,400
Just the watch and the tits.
Just the watch and the tits.
613
00:24:58,400 --> 00:25:00,720
That's the money-maker. Your face
ain't, darling. Trust me, kid.
614
00:25:00,720 --> 00:25:01,880
Yeah, yeah.
615
00:25:01,880 --> 00:25:03,760
Bling, bling, Ravi Singh.
Tag me in it.
616
00:25:04,960 --> 00:25:06,280
What do you want, cleaner?
617
00:25:06,280 --> 00:25:07,880
Oh, I'd just like to finish my job.
618
00:25:08,840 --> 00:25:10,720
Just put things right.
619
00:25:10,720 --> 00:25:11,800
Oh, cheers.
620
00:25:15,880 --> 00:25:16,960
Give me that.
621
00:25:16,960 --> 00:25:18,600
Oh, not the watch! Not the watch!
622
00:25:18,600 --> 00:25:20,000
CAMERA CLICKS
623
00:25:20,000 --> 00:25:21,320
Put that on Insta.
624
00:25:21,320 --> 00:25:22,920
I'm a Premiership footballing...
625
00:25:22,920 --> 00:25:23,960
Ref!
626
00:25:23,960 --> 00:25:27,760
And, for the record,
you're more than a pair of boobs.
627
00:25:27,760 --> 00:25:29,400
No, I'm not.
628
00:25:29,400 --> 00:25:30,440
OK.
629
00:25:31,560 --> 00:25:33,200
Oh, no! Oh, no, not the watch again!
630
00:25:33,200 --> 00:25:34,880
Fuck! Fuck!
Bridesmaid, get me a towel!
631
00:25:34,880 --> 00:25:35,920
Fetch me a towel, love.
632
00:25:37,200 --> 00:25:40,800
# Bob Mammot, King of Storage
633
00:25:40,800 --> 00:25:44,440
# If storage is your thing
Bob Mammot's your king!
634
00:25:44,440 --> 00:25:46,280
# Ra! Ra! Ra! #
635
00:25:46,280 --> 00:25:47,320
SWITCHES OFF
636
00:26:11,080 --> 00:26:12,120
All right?
637
00:26:12,120 --> 00:26:13,200
Ooh...
638
00:26:13,200 --> 00:26:15,000
Did you get it sorted?
639
00:26:15,000 --> 00:26:16,120
Yeah.
640
00:26:16,120 --> 00:26:18,160
It was all quite dramatic
in the end.
641
00:26:18,160 --> 00:26:21,440
Well, that's weddings, though,
innit, really?
642
00:26:21,440 --> 00:26:22,800
Not all of 'em.
643
00:26:24,120 --> 00:26:26,160
Do you know what
I don't get, though?
644
00:26:26,160 --> 00:26:29,240
I mean, that Digga...
645
00:26:29,240 --> 00:26:31,080
..he knew that she
wasn't right for him
646
00:26:31,080 --> 00:26:33,240
and yet he still went ahead with it.
647
00:26:33,240 --> 00:26:36,600
How many times?
They're not real weddings.
648
00:26:38,680 --> 00:26:40,400
Yeah, but...
649
00:26:38,680 --> 00:26:40,400
SHE SIGHS
650
00:26:41,520 --> 00:26:43,160
..why do it at all?
651
00:26:43,160 --> 00:26:46,040
Do you know what I mean?
It's just daft.
652
00:26:46,040 --> 00:26:48,680
Well, just if two people are happy,
653
00:26:48,680 --> 00:26:51,360
just...get on with your life, innit?
Just...
654
00:26:52,880 --> 00:26:54,120
..just get on.
655
00:26:56,640 --> 00:26:58,840
Right, I'm off to bed.
656
00:27:00,680 --> 00:27:02,200
Press start on the microwave.
657
00:27:02,200 --> 00:27:05,040
You're six minutes away
from a top jalfrezi.
658
00:27:05,040 --> 00:27:07,440
Antacids are in the bathroom
cupboard.
659
00:27:07,440 --> 00:27:09,040
Night, love. See you.
73925
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese