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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:10,433 --> 00:00:11,467 - Caitlin? 2 00:00:11,533 --> 00:00:13,100 - No, it's Josh. Hi. 3 00:00:13,167 --> 00:00:14,667 - Josh? 4 00:00:14,733 --> 00:00:16,733 Uh, what's wrong? - Nothing's wrong. 5 00:00:16,800 --> 00:00:18,700 Uh, I'm in Ireland, actually, 6 00:00:18,767 --> 00:00:20,333 with, uh--with Clare. 7 00:00:20,400 --> 00:00:22,000 - Hi, Liza! 8 00:00:22,067 --> 00:00:23,567 - Uh, hi, Clare. 9 00:00:23,633 --> 00:00:25,067 Ireland. Wow. 10 00:00:25,133 --> 00:00:26,667 - Yeah, I got here yesterday. 11 00:00:26,733 --> 00:00:29,367 I kind of missed her, you know? 12 00:00:29,433 --> 00:00:30,800 Wasn't ready to let her go. 13 00:00:30,867 --> 00:00:32,567 - That's so sweet. - Yeah. 14 00:00:32,633 --> 00:00:34,000 But I can't stay here forever, 15 00:00:34,067 --> 00:00:36,067 so I figured the only way 16 00:00:36,133 --> 00:00:39,533 we could keep dating... is if I marry her. 17 00:00:39,600 --> 00:00:41,200 - What? You're gonna marry Clare? 18 00:00:41,267 --> 00:00:42,767 - Yeah. It's the only way to know 19 00:00:42,833 --> 00:00:44,133 what we've got, you know? 20 00:00:44,200 --> 00:00:45,800 Plus, she'll get a green card 21 00:00:45,867 --> 00:00:47,267 so she can keep working back in New York-- 22 00:00:47,333 --> 00:00:49,433 - Josh, are you sure? 23 00:00:49,500 --> 00:00:52,067 A green card marriage is still a marriage. 24 00:00:52,133 --> 00:00:53,800 - I know what I'm doing, all right? 25 00:00:53,867 --> 00:00:55,667 You're responsible for all of this, 26 00:00:55,733 --> 00:00:58,000 so it would mean a lot to me-- 27 00:00:58,067 --> 00:01:00,933 to both of us, really-- 28 00:01:01,067 --> 00:01:02,733 if you were here. 29 00:01:02,800 --> 00:01:05,467 - Here? You mean there? In Ireland? 30 00:01:05,533 --> 00:01:08,600 - I kind of need you, Liza. 31 00:01:12,733 --> 00:01:14,200 - Maggie. Maggie, wake up. 32 00:01:14,267 --> 00:01:16,400 - What? What, is--is there a fire? 33 00:01:16,467 --> 00:01:17,933 - Sort of. Pack your bags. 34 00:01:18,067 --> 00:01:19,333 We're going to Ireland. 35 00:01:19,400 --> 00:01:20,767 - What? 36 00:01:25,833 --> 00:01:28,467 - Josh is going to marry Clare? 37 00:01:28,533 --> 00:01:30,200 - This weekend. Green card. 38 00:01:30,267 --> 00:01:31,933 - I mean, at least we know she's not pregnant. 39 00:01:32,067 --> 00:01:33,733 They've only been dating, like, three weeks. 40 00:01:33,800 --> 00:01:35,067 - That's you, always looking on the bright side. 41 00:01:35,067 --> 00:01:37,433 - Morning, Liza. Peters. 42 00:01:37,500 --> 00:01:41,600 - Ugh, I wish I could see the bright side in that. 43 00:01:41,667 --> 00:01:42,867 - I'll be back on Monday. 44 00:01:42,933 --> 00:01:44,633 So sorry for the late notice. 45 00:01:44,700 --> 00:01:47,200 But everything is in order on "Marriage Vacation." 46 00:01:47,267 --> 00:01:49,067 - So you're taking one. Interesting. 47 00:01:49,133 --> 00:01:50,133 - Not exactly. 48 00:01:50,200 --> 00:01:52,200 Uh, Josh asked me to-- 49 00:01:52,267 --> 00:01:53,800 - Oh, my God, the boy chasing. 50 00:01:53,867 --> 00:01:55,200 Will you never learn? 51 00:01:55,267 --> 00:01:56,867 Take it from a newly single woman. 52 00:01:56,933 --> 00:01:58,967 Men are nothing but a distract-- 53 00:01:59,067 --> 00:02:00,800 - Morning, Diana. I just want to say 54 00:02:00,867 --> 00:02:02,667 how excited I am to be working with you. 55 00:02:02,733 --> 00:02:05,533 And congrats again on the Pubbie. 56 00:02:05,600 --> 00:02:08,200 - Marketing is really... my passion. 57 00:02:08,267 --> 00:02:10,067 - Oh, mine too. That's where I got started. 58 00:02:10,100 --> 00:02:11,867 You can't believe the number of duds 59 00:02:11,933 --> 00:02:13,233 that I've gotten on the best-seller list 60 00:02:13,300 --> 00:02:15,067 with a good campaign. 61 00:02:15,100 --> 00:02:16,600 - Yes! I know exactly what you're talking about. 62 00:02:16,667 --> 00:02:18,067 We are the unsung heroes! 63 00:02:21,433 --> 00:02:22,600 Don't you have a plane to catch? 64 00:02:37,133 --> 00:02:39,267 - Hey! - Hi! 65 00:02:39,333 --> 00:02:40,733 - You made it! 66 00:02:40,800 --> 00:02:42,500 - Hey! Google Maps said an hour, 67 00:02:42,567 --> 00:02:43,833 but the sheep in front of us said three, so... 68 00:02:43,900 --> 00:02:45,367 - Yeah, that's Ireland for you. 69 00:02:45,433 --> 00:02:47,667 - Hi. - Hey! 70 00:02:47,733 --> 00:02:50,133 Maggie, Liza, this is my mum, Noreen. 71 00:02:50,200 --> 00:02:51,800 - Hello. - Hi. Nice to meet you. 72 00:02:51,867 --> 00:02:53,867 - Ah, you're so... - Oh, hi. 73 00:02:53,933 --> 00:02:55,567 - Mum, will you take a picture? 74 00:02:55,633 --> 00:02:57,700 - Oh, yeah. - Oh, sure. 75 00:02:57,767 --> 00:02:58,867 Okay. 76 00:02:58,933 --> 00:03:00,667 - Oh, okay. 77 00:03:00,733 --> 00:03:01,867 - Say, "Tinahely." 78 00:03:01,933 --> 00:03:03,600 all: Tinahely! 79 00:03:03,667 --> 00:03:05,667 - Golly. 80 00:03:05,733 --> 00:03:08,100 Clare, let's book an actual photographer for the wedding. 81 00:03:08,167 --> 00:03:10,067 Oh, and we need to get the caterer's quote down 82 00:03:10,133 --> 00:03:11,767 and find a band. 83 00:03:11,833 --> 00:03:13,867 God, so much to do before we get these two lovebirds 84 00:03:13,933 --> 00:03:15,933 in front of Father Flannery. 85 00:03:16,067 --> 00:03:18,867 - You guys are going to a lot of effort for this. 86 00:03:18,933 --> 00:03:20,900 - Yeah, of course. - Yeah, why wouldn't we? 87 00:03:20,967 --> 00:03:22,333 - Because it's just for a green-- 88 00:03:22,400 --> 00:03:24,400 - Green--yeah, a green-- a green wedding. 89 00:03:24,467 --> 00:03:26,667 In America, everyone likes to be "green." 90 00:03:26,733 --> 00:03:28,800 Not wasteful, eco-friendly sort of thing. 91 00:03:28,867 --> 00:03:30,233 - Right. - Oh. 92 00:03:30,300 --> 00:03:32,067 Well, in Ireland, we like to have fun. 93 00:03:32,067 --> 00:03:33,267 And follow tradition. 94 00:03:33,333 --> 00:03:35,433 I best be off. 95 00:03:35,500 --> 00:03:37,100 I'll leave it to Clare to give you the tour. 96 00:03:37,167 --> 00:03:38,267 - Bye. - See you later. 97 00:03:38,333 --> 00:03:40,067 - Bye, Mum. - Bye. 98 00:03:41,633 --> 00:03:44,433 - Yes, this is still a green card wedding, 99 00:03:44,500 --> 00:03:46,800 but no one here knows about that. 100 00:03:46,867 --> 00:03:48,067 - What? How? - You're kidding. 101 00:03:48,067 --> 00:03:49,567 - As soon as Mum found out, 102 00:03:49,633 --> 00:03:51,533 she went into mother-of-the-bride overdrive. 103 00:03:51,600 --> 00:03:52,900 - Well, wouldn't it be easier 104 00:03:52,967 --> 00:03:55,067 just to be honest with her? 105 00:03:55,133 --> 00:03:57,067 I'll shut up. 106 00:03:57,133 --> 00:03:59,200 - I know we should have been, but it's too late now. 107 00:03:59,267 --> 00:04:01,500 So it's gonna be a traditional country wedding 108 00:04:01,567 --> 00:04:02,933 with all the trimmings. 109 00:04:03,067 --> 00:04:05,067 - Josh, anything I can do to help? 110 00:04:05,133 --> 00:04:07,400 I mean, could go suit shopping with you or... 111 00:04:07,467 --> 00:04:09,633 - Uh, no. I think we got it. 112 00:04:09,700 --> 00:04:11,200 Come on, Mags, let's get you checked in. 113 00:04:11,267 --> 00:04:12,700 - Oh, okay. Awesome. 114 00:04:12,767 --> 00:04:14,700 - Do you want to head up to Dublin with me? 115 00:04:14,767 --> 00:04:15,933 - Dublin? 116 00:04:16,067 --> 00:04:17,933 Yeah, I'd--I'd love to! 117 00:04:18,067 --> 00:04:19,600 - I've got to pick up my dress. 118 00:04:20,767 --> 00:04:22,833 - Wonderful. Okay. 119 00:04:26,233 --> 00:04:28,200 - Charles, Zane has some fascinating ideas 120 00:04:28,267 --> 00:04:29,633 for "Marriage Vacation." 121 00:04:29,700 --> 00:04:31,967 - "Marriage Vacation" is not his book. 122 00:04:32,067 --> 00:04:33,933 It's my book and Liza's. 123 00:04:34,067 --> 00:04:35,300 - Is Liza joining us? 124 00:04:35,367 --> 00:04:37,467 - Ah. I meant to tell you, she is-- 125 00:04:37,533 --> 00:04:39,167 - Chasing Josh around Ireland. 126 00:04:41,600 --> 00:04:43,067 - Really? - I know. 127 00:04:43,133 --> 00:04:44,467 Leave without pay, obviously. 128 00:04:44,533 --> 00:04:46,067 - She's working remotely. 129 00:04:46,133 --> 00:04:47,833 She put this marketing deck together. 130 00:04:47,900 --> 00:04:49,067 - Thanks for the segue, Peters. 131 00:04:49,100 --> 00:04:50,600 - No, I wasn't finished. I-- 132 00:04:50,667 --> 00:04:51,967 - "Good Morning America" is interested 133 00:04:52,067 --> 00:04:53,333 in promoting the book. 134 00:04:53,400 --> 00:04:54,867 Their producer, Cece Jones-- 135 00:04:54,933 --> 00:04:56,800 - Charles, Cece is my contact. 136 00:04:56,867 --> 00:04:58,367 I met her at The Nest a few weeks ago-- 137 00:04:58,433 --> 00:05:00,800 - Cece and I are old friends. 138 00:05:00,867 --> 00:05:02,367 She can give us two segments, 139 00:05:02,433 --> 00:05:03,800 with hero shots of the book cover 140 00:05:03,867 --> 00:05:05,667 in and out of commercial breaks. 141 00:05:05,733 --> 00:05:07,067 And she wants to include 142 00:05:07,133 --> 00:05:08,767 the real-life "Marriage Vacation," 143 00:05:08,833 --> 00:05:10,800 with you, Charles, onstage with Pauline. 144 00:05:10,867 --> 00:05:13,067 Her return. Your reconciliation-- 145 00:05:13,067 --> 00:05:15,100 - Absolutely not. 146 00:05:16,533 --> 00:05:18,333 - But I thought you two were back together. 147 00:05:18,400 --> 00:05:20,333 - We're selling a book, Zane, 148 00:05:20,400 --> 00:05:23,333 not exploiting Charles' family for sales. 149 00:05:23,400 --> 00:05:24,900 - Kelsey's right. 150 00:05:24,967 --> 00:05:26,667 This is a little close to home for me. 151 00:05:26,733 --> 00:05:28,533 - Of course. 152 00:05:28,600 --> 00:05:30,933 But I thought the angle that Empirical was taking-- 153 00:05:31,067 --> 00:05:32,867 - Millennial. 154 00:05:32,933 --> 00:05:35,800 - Millennial was taking was that the book is about... 155 00:05:35,867 --> 00:05:38,467 two people finding their way back to each other. 156 00:05:38,533 --> 00:05:40,233 - Wow. 157 00:05:40,300 --> 00:05:42,100 Way off. 158 00:05:42,167 --> 00:05:45,367 - Charles, having Pauline and you on "GMA" would... 159 00:05:45,433 --> 00:05:47,133 help sell the narrative. 160 00:05:47,200 --> 00:05:48,700 - I don't think so. 161 00:05:48,767 --> 00:05:50,367 - Maybe we could let them get a shot of you 162 00:05:50,433 --> 00:05:52,333 by the side of stage, just a nod and wave. 163 00:05:52,400 --> 00:05:53,933 - I'll think about it. We'll see. 164 00:05:54,067 --> 00:05:55,667 - Regardless, I'll lock it in with Cece. 165 00:05:55,733 --> 00:05:57,600 Peters, shall we? 166 00:05:57,667 --> 00:05:59,167 - Already dialing. 167 00:06:02,133 --> 00:06:04,500 - So you and Pauline are back together? 168 00:06:04,567 --> 00:06:06,633 - Uh, well, I wouldn't-- I wouldn't say that exactly. 169 00:06:06,700 --> 00:06:08,467 Uh, but she did move back in. 170 00:06:08,533 --> 00:06:11,267 Uh, the guest room. You know, for the girls. 171 00:06:11,333 --> 00:06:12,933 - Typical. 172 00:06:13,067 --> 00:06:15,733 Richard and I have recently parted ways. 173 00:06:15,800 --> 00:06:17,600 - Hmm. 174 00:06:17,667 --> 00:06:19,733 - We're like ships in the night. 175 00:06:25,533 --> 00:06:26,767 - Say, "Oscar Wilde." 176 00:06:26,833 --> 00:06:29,200 - Oscar Wilde! Yay! 177 00:06:29,267 --> 00:06:31,633 Oh, so many photos. My face hurts. 178 00:06:31,700 --> 00:06:33,867 - Oh, I know. It's for the wedding book. 179 00:06:33,933 --> 00:06:35,467 - The photo album? 180 00:06:35,533 --> 00:06:37,133 - Uh, no, it's-- it's the book of evidence 181 00:06:37,200 --> 00:06:39,300 we need to apply for my green card. 182 00:06:39,367 --> 00:06:42,967 We need photos, receipts, ticket stubs. 183 00:06:43,067 --> 00:06:44,667 - Ugh, that sounds like a lot of work. 184 00:06:44,733 --> 00:06:47,500 - Yeah, and then immigration will interrogate us 185 00:06:47,567 --> 00:06:50,333 about the validity of our marriage... 186 00:06:50,400 --> 00:06:52,200 our friends too. 187 00:06:52,267 --> 00:06:54,600 That's actually what I wanted to talk to you about. 188 00:06:54,667 --> 00:06:57,733 If they ask you any questions... 189 00:06:57,800 --> 00:06:59,300 - Me? 190 00:06:59,367 --> 00:07:02,700 - Yeah, I mean, you and Josh are so close. 191 00:07:02,767 --> 00:07:04,733 So if--if they ask you, can you tell them 192 00:07:04,800 --> 00:07:07,600 that we got married because we love each other? 193 00:07:07,667 --> 00:07:09,867 - But are you in love with Josh? 194 00:07:09,933 --> 00:07:11,933 - Well, I-I love that he's willing to do this 195 00:07:12,067 --> 00:07:15,667 so I can follow my dreams in the States. 196 00:07:15,733 --> 00:07:19,067 He's amazing, right? 197 00:07:19,067 --> 00:07:20,600 - Yeah, he is. 198 00:07:22,200 --> 00:07:24,867 I can say, um--I can say whatever you need me to say. 199 00:07:24,933 --> 00:07:26,800 - Thanks. 200 00:07:26,867 --> 00:07:29,500 And if they ask you how long we've been together, 201 00:07:29,567 --> 00:07:32,733 could you say six months instead of one? 202 00:07:32,800 --> 00:07:35,133 Six is just more... 203 00:07:35,200 --> 00:07:39,067 - Yeah, it is. Six times more. 204 00:07:39,100 --> 00:07:40,900 - I know it's a lie, 205 00:07:40,967 --> 00:07:43,200 but it's a tiny white lie, 206 00:07:43,267 --> 00:07:48,067 like the one you had to tell to, you know, get your job. 207 00:07:48,067 --> 00:07:49,533 - You know about that? 208 00:07:49,600 --> 00:07:50,800 - Yeah, of course. 209 00:07:50,867 --> 00:07:52,233 Josh and I are getting married. 210 00:07:52,300 --> 00:07:54,367 We don't keep secrets from each other. 211 00:07:54,433 --> 00:07:57,333 - Including this? Josh knows you're asking me to do this? 212 00:07:57,400 --> 00:07:59,867 - Knows? Liza, it was his idea. 213 00:08:00,067 --> 00:08:03,567 That's why he wants you here, to bolster our story. 214 00:08:03,633 --> 00:08:05,333 - Really? - Yeah. 215 00:08:05,400 --> 00:08:08,867 From what he's told me, you kind of owe him this, right? 216 00:08:08,933 --> 00:08:11,667 - Him or you? 217 00:08:11,733 --> 00:08:14,367 - Us. 218 00:08:26,600 --> 00:08:28,900 - Josh only invited me here so I would lie for him. 219 00:08:28,967 --> 00:08:30,767 - There goes my peaceful nature walk. 220 00:08:30,833 --> 00:08:32,967 Why did I ever leave Brooklyn? I always regret it. 221 00:08:33,067 --> 00:08:34,567 - Sorry, it's just, it's so insane! 222 00:08:34,633 --> 00:08:36,067 I'm not gonna lie to Homeland Security. 223 00:08:36,100 --> 00:08:37,333 It's a felony. 224 00:08:37,400 --> 00:08:38,900 - That doesn't sound like Josh. 225 00:08:38,967 --> 00:08:40,633 He hates lying, and he hates liars. 226 00:08:40,700 --> 00:08:42,900 I mean, what the hell is really bugging you, girl? 227 00:08:42,967 --> 00:08:45,467 - I just wish he'd asked me himself. 228 00:08:45,533 --> 00:08:47,233 Something just doesn't feel right about this. 229 00:08:47,300 --> 00:08:48,933 - Oh, don't make trouble. You're not here 230 00:08:49,067 --> 00:08:51,067 to "My Best Friend's Wedding" this wedding. 231 00:08:51,133 --> 00:08:52,900 - I'm not, and I won't. 232 00:08:52,967 --> 00:08:54,233 It's just, he's barely said 233 00:08:54,300 --> 00:08:55,767 two words to me since I got here. 234 00:08:55,833 --> 00:08:57,567 I just feel like this whole marriage 235 00:08:57,633 --> 00:08:59,100 is a reaction to everything that's happened between us. 236 00:08:59,167 --> 00:09:00,500 - Wait, Liza! 237 00:09:00,567 --> 00:09:01,733 - And I think he's rushing into I. 238 00:09:01,800 --> 00:09:04,600 - I'm back here! Oh, no! 239 00:09:04,667 --> 00:09:05,933 - Oh, my God! 240 00:09:06,067 --> 00:09:08,067 - I'm sinking! 241 00:09:08,067 --> 00:09:09,500 Oh! 242 00:09:09,567 --> 00:09:12,633 I--oh, no! - You're in a peat bog! 243 00:09:12,700 --> 00:09:14,400 - I read about that in the in-flight magazine! 244 00:09:14,467 --> 00:09:15,633 It can swallow a horse! 245 00:09:15,700 --> 00:09:17,467 - Um, I can't-- 246 00:09:17,533 --> 00:09:18,800 Okay, I'm gonna go get help! 247 00:09:18,867 --> 00:09:19,933 You stay there! 248 00:09:20,067 --> 00:09:22,467 - Hurry! 249 00:09:22,533 --> 00:09:24,367 - Ugh, it smells like ass. 250 00:09:24,433 --> 00:09:25,500 Ugh! 251 00:09:35,200 --> 00:09:37,067 Ooh! - Oh, God. 252 00:09:40,667 --> 00:09:44,167 - Oh, thanks again, Noreen. Lifesaver. 253 00:09:44,233 --> 00:09:45,833 - Oh, I could have been a bog body. 254 00:09:45,900 --> 00:09:47,367 - Ha. It happens all the time. 255 00:09:47,433 --> 00:09:49,667 We lost our best calf in that bog last week. 256 00:09:49,733 --> 00:09:52,633 - Oh, you're soaked through. 257 00:09:52,700 --> 00:09:54,100 - Well, my place is just over the hill. 258 00:09:54,167 --> 00:09:55,533 You're welcome to clean up there. 259 00:09:55,600 --> 00:09:57,467 You could probably do with some hot tea. 260 00:09:57,533 --> 00:09:59,100 - Or an Irish coffee. 261 00:09:59,167 --> 00:10:00,600 - Strongest in the village. 262 00:10:00,667 --> 00:10:01,833 - Sold. 263 00:10:01,900 --> 00:10:03,667 - You go. I got to find Josh. 264 00:10:03,733 --> 00:10:05,733 - Yeah, good luck. And watch your step. 265 00:10:09,733 --> 00:10:11,100 - And welcome back to "Good Morning America." 266 00:10:11,167 --> 00:10:12,800 We are here with Pauline Turner-Brooks, 267 00:10:12,867 --> 00:10:14,667 who has written this incredible book 268 00:10:14,733 --> 00:10:16,200 called "Marriage Vacation." 269 00:10:16,267 --> 00:10:17,967 - And not just a book but what seems 270 00:10:18,033 --> 00:10:19,967 a thinly veiled version of her very own life, 271 00:10:20,033 --> 00:10:21,467 her own marriage. 272 00:10:21,533 --> 00:10:22,833 - So, I mean, technically, this is fiction, 273 00:10:22,900 --> 00:10:24,633 but how about we call it "faction"? 274 00:10:24,700 --> 00:10:27,300 - Oh, my God, I love that. "Faction." Can I quote you? 275 00:10:27,367 --> 00:10:29,233 So, uh, this is a story about a woman... 276 00:10:29,300 --> 00:10:33,100 - This is quite the coup. 277 00:10:33,167 --> 00:10:35,400 Your ex is a smooth operator. 278 00:10:35,467 --> 00:10:37,000 - He is not my ex. 279 00:10:37,067 --> 00:10:39,100 - Your F-U buddy, then? 280 00:10:39,167 --> 00:10:43,100 - It's just F. And no. 281 00:10:44,400 --> 00:10:46,133 - Pauline is a natural. I think it's going great. 282 00:10:46,200 --> 00:10:48,200 - And I think it's not what we agreed on. 283 00:10:48,267 --> 00:10:50,700 I asked for juicy content, Zane. Juicy. 284 00:10:50,767 --> 00:10:52,167 We're stretching, and we haven't even made it 285 00:10:52,233 --> 00:10:53,733 to the first commercial break. 286 00:10:53,800 --> 00:10:55,333 I should have pulled the segment the second 287 00:10:55,400 --> 00:10:57,100 the sexy husband refused to go on the air. 288 00:10:57,167 --> 00:10:58,500 - Not gonna happen, sorry. 289 00:10:58,567 --> 00:10:59,733 - I'm cutting it, then. Sorry. 290 00:10:59,800 --> 00:11:01,567 - Wait. Okay, look. 291 00:11:01,633 --> 00:11:03,067 He told me no yesterday, 292 00:11:03,133 --> 00:11:06,067 but maybe if they ask nicely on the air... 293 00:11:06,133 --> 00:11:07,667 - Did you just give me permission? 294 00:11:07,733 --> 00:11:08,700 - Mm... 295 00:11:11,367 --> 00:11:13,200 - Zane, what is going on? 296 00:11:13,267 --> 00:11:14,700 What did you just say to Cece? 297 00:11:18,067 --> 00:11:21,067 - Pauline, I've been told your husband is here. 298 00:11:21,100 --> 00:11:22,800 - He is? - Oh, yes. 299 00:11:22,867 --> 00:11:24,933 - How supportive, after all the intimate details 300 00:11:25,067 --> 00:11:26,300 you revealed about him in this book. 301 00:11:26,367 --> 00:11:28,467 - Oh, well, that is a character. 302 00:11:28,533 --> 00:11:29,900 - But he's here? Where is he? 303 00:11:29,967 --> 00:11:31,733 - Um, he's... - Where? Where? 304 00:11:31,800 --> 00:11:33,367 Oh, that's him? 305 00:11:33,433 --> 00:11:35,167 - Come on out. We'd love to talk to you. 306 00:11:35,233 --> 00:11:36,933 Audience, wouldn't we love to hear from Charles? 307 00:11:37,067 --> 00:11:39,067 - Oh, he doesn't-- 308 00:11:39,067 --> 00:11:40,800 He's a little shy. - Come on out. 309 00:11:40,867 --> 00:11:43,400 - Come on! - They want to hear from you. 310 00:11:43,467 --> 00:11:46,600 - Oh, my God. 311 00:11:46,667 --> 00:11:48,600 - Welcome. 312 00:11:51,367 --> 00:11:53,300 - So tell me about yourself, Maggie. 313 00:11:53,367 --> 00:11:55,867 - Well, I'm born in Queens. 314 00:11:55,933 --> 00:11:57,567 I'm an artist. I'm gay-- 315 00:11:57,633 --> 00:11:59,800 - Oh! - You sound surprised. 316 00:11:59,867 --> 00:12:01,767 I mean, they do have lesbians here in Ireland, right? 317 00:12:01,833 --> 00:12:03,367 - We call them nuns. 318 00:12:03,433 --> 00:12:05,800 I was reacting to "artist." 319 00:12:05,867 --> 00:12:08,867 'Cause I sort of fancy myself as being one too. 320 00:12:08,933 --> 00:12:10,533 Not on your level, now. 321 00:12:10,600 --> 00:12:12,533 Can I show you something? 322 00:12:14,433 --> 00:12:16,133 - What are we looking at here again? 323 00:12:17,700 --> 00:12:19,467 Ever since Clare's father passed away, 324 00:12:19,533 --> 00:12:22,067 I keep painting this same landscape. 325 00:12:22,067 --> 00:12:25,300 It's this image that just comes to me in my dreams. 326 00:12:25,367 --> 00:12:27,400 These two rounded hills, 327 00:12:27,467 --> 00:12:30,167 and then there's this valley where they meet, 328 00:12:30,233 --> 00:12:34,133 and right in the center, there's an opening or a cave. 329 00:12:34,200 --> 00:12:36,067 I can't explain it. 330 00:12:36,133 --> 00:12:37,867 I've never been in there, but I'd love to. 331 00:12:37,933 --> 00:12:39,167 I really would. 332 00:12:42,167 --> 00:12:44,600 And what's that pink thing? 333 00:12:44,667 --> 00:12:46,800 - A boulder, I guess. 334 00:12:46,867 --> 00:12:49,067 Just a round little nubby sort of thing 335 00:12:49,133 --> 00:12:51,267 right on top of the cave. 336 00:12:51,333 --> 00:12:53,100 You can touch it if you want. 337 00:12:53,167 --> 00:12:55,300 Actually, no. It's still wet. 338 00:12:58,233 --> 00:13:00,367 You know... 339 00:13:00,433 --> 00:13:02,533 ever since I lost my husband, 340 00:13:02,600 --> 00:13:07,133 I've thought about being a nun. 341 00:13:07,200 --> 00:13:08,933 - No shit. 342 00:13:12,433 --> 00:13:14,067 - Sláinte! 343 00:13:14,067 --> 00:13:15,467 - Well, there's no turning back now, man. 344 00:13:15,533 --> 00:13:17,200 - Yeah. - Your goose is cooked! 345 00:13:17,267 --> 00:13:19,933 - Remember, if you hurt her, we'll kill you. 346 00:13:20,067 --> 00:13:20,933 - Yeah. - Yeah? 347 00:13:21,067 --> 00:13:22,167 - Yeah. 348 00:13:22,233 --> 00:13:23,567 Yeah, I got it. 349 00:13:26,067 --> 00:13:28,133 - Josh. - Oh. 350 00:13:28,200 --> 00:13:30,467 - There you are. - Hey. What's up, Liza? 351 00:13:30,533 --> 00:13:33,533 - Hey. I feel like you've been avoiding me 352 00:13:33,600 --> 00:13:34,600 ever since I got here. 353 00:13:34,667 --> 00:13:36,333 - No! No, no, no, no. 354 00:13:36,400 --> 00:13:39,500 This--this has been totally wild. 355 00:13:39,567 --> 00:13:41,400 Way more than what I expected. 356 00:13:41,467 --> 00:13:43,567 - Yeah, me too. - Yeah. 357 00:13:43,633 --> 00:13:46,667 - I'm, um--I'm starting to feel a little set up here, actually. 358 00:13:46,733 --> 00:13:49,267 - Oh. Oh, you mean 'cause of the whole "six month" thing. 359 00:13:49,333 --> 00:13:50,600 Yeah. 360 00:13:50,667 --> 00:13:52,200 Look, if you don't want to do it, 361 00:13:52,267 --> 00:13:53,500 it's totally cool. 362 00:13:53,567 --> 00:13:55,367 I understand. 363 00:13:55,433 --> 00:13:56,833 I mean, I don't-- I don't want to make you 364 00:13:56,900 --> 00:13:58,933 feel uncomfortable or anything. 365 00:13:59,067 --> 00:14:01,733 - It does make me feel a little uncomfortable, actually. 366 00:14:01,800 --> 00:14:05,200 This is a very official lie. 367 00:14:05,267 --> 00:14:06,733 Homeland Security? 368 00:14:06,800 --> 00:14:09,967 - So what you're basically saying is, 369 00:14:10,067 --> 00:14:13,533 you'll lie for yourself, but you won't lie for me. 370 00:14:13,600 --> 00:14:15,733 - Am I lying for you? 371 00:14:15,800 --> 00:14:17,433 Or am I lying to get Clare a green card? 372 00:14:17,500 --> 00:14:22,400 - What? This is-- this isn't for her, Liza. 373 00:14:22,467 --> 00:14:24,800 This is for us. 374 00:14:24,867 --> 00:14:27,267 So we can be together in New York City 375 00:14:27,333 --> 00:14:29,300 and see where this leads. 376 00:14:29,367 --> 00:14:31,300 Shit, really? 377 00:14:31,367 --> 00:14:33,200 I mean, who do you think Clare is? 378 00:14:33,267 --> 00:14:35,533 - I don't know, Josh, and I don't think you know either. 379 00:14:36,833 --> 00:14:39,467 If you don't want to be here, 380 00:14:39,533 --> 00:14:42,333 just go home. 381 00:14:42,400 --> 00:14:45,433 - * I can't see clear anymore * 382 00:14:45,500 --> 00:14:49,167 * Throw me a lifeline * 383 00:14:51,933 --> 00:14:53,100 - * Ah, ah, ah, ah-ah-ah * 384 00:14:53,167 --> 00:14:54,367 * Ah-ah, ah-ah-ah * 385 00:14:54,433 --> 00:14:56,400 * Ah, ah, ah-ah-ah * 386 00:14:56,467 --> 00:14:58,400 - That is not what we had planned. 387 00:14:58,467 --> 00:14:59,867 - I'm so sorry, Charles. 388 00:15:00,067 --> 00:15:01,800 Cece just got out of control, okay? 389 00:15:01,867 --> 00:15:03,233 Didn't she, Peters? 390 00:15:03,300 --> 00:15:04,567 - Why are you asking me? 391 00:15:04,633 --> 00:15:06,067 I had nothing to do with that. 392 00:15:06,100 --> 00:15:07,767 - Seriously? She's your connection, 393 00:15:07,833 --> 00:15:09,133 and this is your book. 394 00:15:09,200 --> 00:15:10,667 Look, I'm not gonna point fingers. 395 00:15:10,733 --> 00:15:12,833 - I don't like what's happening here. 396 00:15:12,900 --> 00:15:14,300 - Neither do I. 397 00:15:14,367 --> 00:15:15,433 - I just helped your book. 398 00:15:15,500 --> 00:15:17,967 - Zane, let me catch you up. 399 00:15:18,067 --> 00:15:20,367 I've already had two "New York Times" best sellers 400 00:15:20,433 --> 00:15:22,433 and turned an advice book from a dog 401 00:15:22,500 --> 00:15:24,700 into a million-dollar franchise. 402 00:15:24,767 --> 00:15:26,133 I don't need your help. 403 00:15:32,667 --> 00:15:34,700 - Thank you for being such a good sport, 404 00:15:34,767 --> 00:15:36,567 answering all those questions. 405 00:15:36,633 --> 00:15:39,067 - They made it sound like we reconciled. 406 00:15:39,067 --> 00:15:43,767 - It's not the craziest idea in the world. 407 00:15:43,833 --> 00:15:45,700 Is it? 408 00:15:47,967 --> 00:15:53,267 - I think that we are still a... work in progress. 409 00:15:55,100 --> 00:15:56,333 - Fair enough. 410 00:16:00,233 --> 00:16:02,100 Oh, my God. 411 00:16:02,167 --> 00:16:03,567 From Diana. 412 00:16:03,633 --> 00:16:06,633 The "GMA" page is blowing up. 413 00:16:09,167 --> 00:16:10,300 Wow. 414 00:16:13,067 --> 00:16:16,067 I guess it did go well. 415 00:16:26,067 --> 00:16:28,333 - Hey, we should go. Josh doesn't want me here. 416 00:16:28,400 --> 00:16:31,067 - You just want to slip away and pull an Irish good-bye? 417 00:16:31,100 --> 00:16:32,633 - It was a bad idea to come. Besides, everyone here 418 00:16:32,700 --> 00:16:34,200 is so drunk, they won't even notice. 419 00:16:34,267 --> 00:16:35,900 - A bad idea to support Josh? 420 00:16:35,967 --> 00:16:37,900 You keep on saying, "We're friends." 421 00:16:37,967 --> 00:16:40,367 So prove it. Be a friend. 422 00:16:40,433 --> 00:16:42,500 Be the best man that he needs you to be. 423 00:16:42,567 --> 00:16:44,900 - Liza, Maggie, this is Fiona. 424 00:16:44,967 --> 00:16:46,500 - Hi! - Hi. 425 00:16:46,567 --> 00:16:49,633 - Liza! - Oh! Hi. 426 00:16:49,700 --> 00:16:51,867 - I've only seen you on Clare's Instagram, 427 00:16:51,933 --> 00:16:54,833 but I already feel like I know you, you know? 428 00:16:54,900 --> 00:16:58,367 - Fiona's my oldest friend. She's also very, very drunk. 429 00:16:58,433 --> 00:16:59,867 - Shut up, Clare. 430 00:17:00,067 --> 00:17:01,167 Come. Let's show these Yanks how to dance. 431 00:17:01,233 --> 00:17:02,767 - Uh, let's not. 432 00:17:02,833 --> 00:17:04,133 - Please! 433 00:17:04,200 --> 00:17:06,433 - Ugh, fine. Not without Liza. 434 00:17:06,500 --> 00:17:08,133 - Oh, no. No, no, no, no. - Come on. 435 00:17:08,200 --> 00:17:10,600 - Okay. 436 00:17:10,667 --> 00:17:12,567 - Now point your toes. 437 00:17:12,633 --> 00:17:14,433 And up, two, three, four, 438 00:17:14,500 --> 00:17:15,500 five, six, seven. 439 00:17:15,567 --> 00:17:16,633 Up, two, three, four, 440 00:17:16,700 --> 00:17:18,067 five, six, seven. 441 00:17:18,133 --> 00:17:20,500 - Liza, keep your arms down. 442 00:17:20,567 --> 00:17:21,967 It's tradition. - Okay. 443 00:17:22,067 --> 00:17:23,267 - It's because the priests thought 444 00:17:23,333 --> 00:17:24,833 if girls moved their upper body, 445 00:17:24,900 --> 00:17:26,700 it would "inflame the boys." 446 00:17:27,833 --> 00:17:29,133 - You can't move your arms 447 00:17:29,200 --> 00:17:30,567 without shaking your dirty pillows. 448 00:17:30,633 --> 00:17:32,067 - Isn't the whole point of dancing 449 00:17:32,100 --> 00:17:33,967 to shake your dirty pillows? 450 00:17:39,367 --> 00:17:40,600 - That's more like it! 451 00:17:40,667 --> 00:17:42,433 - Now we're in Ireland! 452 00:17:44,900 --> 00:17:48,367 - What's going on? - It's a Riverdance-off. 453 00:18:03,433 --> 00:18:06,633 - And so I want to thank you all for being here. 454 00:18:06,700 --> 00:18:08,700 To my family. 455 00:18:08,767 --> 00:18:10,300 And, uh, to Liza. 456 00:18:10,367 --> 00:18:13,433 She fixed me up with Josh, and... 457 00:18:13,500 --> 00:18:15,800 Well, how do you thank someone 458 00:18:15,867 --> 00:18:16,867 for the love of your life? 459 00:18:16,933 --> 00:18:18,167 - Oh, come on. 460 00:18:18,233 --> 00:18:19,767 I didn't do that much. 461 00:18:19,833 --> 00:18:22,467 Just said he wasn't a jerk, basically. 462 00:18:22,533 --> 00:18:27,800 - Now I'd like to make a speech. 463 00:18:27,867 --> 00:18:32,667 I've been in a little Instagram K-hole the last couple of days, 464 00:18:32,733 --> 00:18:36,433 and I found out something pretty interesting. 465 00:18:36,500 --> 00:18:38,567 This isn't a love match. 466 00:18:38,633 --> 00:18:41,967 Clare just met Josh, like, last month. 467 00:18:42,067 --> 00:18:45,233 This whole thing is for a green card, 468 00:18:45,300 --> 00:18:48,567 'cause Clare hates us and hates Ireland. 469 00:18:48,633 --> 00:18:51,067 - Fiona, stop! - It's all lies! 470 00:18:51,100 --> 00:18:54,500 How can you love someone you met one month ago? 471 00:18:55,733 --> 00:18:57,267 - Is any of that true, Clare? 472 00:19:00,767 --> 00:19:03,167 - They met six months ago! 473 00:19:03,233 --> 00:19:05,600 And I should know, because I am the one who introduced them 474 00:19:05,667 --> 00:19:08,267 and watched them fall in love. 475 00:19:09,233 --> 00:19:10,733 And he asked her to marry him. 476 00:19:12,100 --> 00:19:14,400 And when someone you love that much proposes, 477 00:19:14,467 --> 00:19:15,800 you say yes. 478 00:19:19,067 --> 00:19:22,167 Believe me, you say yes. 479 00:19:22,233 --> 00:19:24,533 So I think we should raise a glass 480 00:19:24,600 --> 00:19:27,833 to the happy couple. 481 00:19:27,900 --> 00:19:29,833 To Clare and Josh! 482 00:19:29,900 --> 00:19:31,567 all: To Clare and Josh! 483 00:19:31,633 --> 00:19:35,733 - * Ooh-ooh-ooh, ooh, ooh * 484 00:19:35,800 --> 00:19:37,833 - Thank you, Liza. 485 00:19:37,900 --> 00:19:38,967 Thank you. 486 00:19:44,433 --> 00:19:47,167 - So, Charles, did you get any vacation during all of this? 487 00:19:47,233 --> 00:19:49,767 - Uh, I, uh-- I went to the Hamptons once. 488 00:19:49,833 --> 00:19:52,867 - Hamptons once. Now, was that business or pleasure? 489 00:19:52,933 --> 00:19:56,500 - Uh, strictly business. - Strictly business. 490 00:19:56,567 --> 00:20:00,300 Okay, and are you two back together as a family now? 491 00:20:00,367 --> 00:20:02,400 - We are working on it. 492 00:20:02,467 --> 00:20:03,733 - We love hearing that, right, everybody? 493 00:20:03,800 --> 00:20:05,500 Yeah. 494 00:20:05,567 --> 00:20:07,167 Pauline and Charles, we are so grateful 495 00:20:07,233 --> 00:20:08,300 you are joining us today. 496 00:20:13,167 --> 00:20:14,533 - Wrong room, Josh. 497 00:20:14,600 --> 00:20:17,433 - Nope. Right room. 498 00:20:17,500 --> 00:20:19,100 - Josh, what are you doing here? 499 00:20:22,167 --> 00:20:23,733 I don't know. 500 00:20:23,800 --> 00:20:25,500 I don't know what I'm doing. 501 00:20:25,567 --> 00:20:28,733 - You don't have to do anything you don't want to do. 502 00:20:28,800 --> 00:20:30,833 Follow your heart. 503 00:20:30,900 --> 00:20:32,967 - You're right. 504 00:20:42,767 --> 00:20:45,033 It's you, Liza. 505 00:20:45,100 --> 00:20:46,967 It's always been you. 506 00:20:47,033 --> 00:20:53,367 - * We spent some time together walking * 507 00:20:53,433 --> 00:20:56,700 * Spent some time just talking * 508 00:20:56,767 --> 00:20:58,367 - Josh, we can't. 509 00:20:58,433 --> 00:21:00,800 We can't do this. You know why. 510 00:21:00,867 --> 00:21:02,900 Please, I can't give you the life that you want. 511 00:21:02,967 --> 00:21:04,167 - No, no, no. 512 00:21:04,233 --> 00:21:06,167 The life that I want 513 00:21:06,233 --> 00:21:08,600 is any life with you. 514 00:21:08,667 --> 00:21:13,300 - * And told me what we could be * 515 00:21:13,367 --> 00:21:15,467 - I have to tell Clare that I can't marry her. 516 00:21:15,533 --> 00:21:16,900 - Josh. 517 00:21:18,400 --> 00:21:20,900 Maybe not right this second. 518 00:21:20,967 --> 00:21:23,700 Can I just sit here for a sec? 519 00:21:23,767 --> 00:21:25,900 - All right, let me get you a glass of water, okay? 520 00:21:33,767 --> 00:21:36,967 - * There's nothing like you and I * 521 00:21:37,067 --> 00:21:41,567 * There's nothing like you and I * 522 00:21:41,633 --> 00:21:44,467 * Nothing like * 523 00:21:44,533 --> 00:21:49,433 * You and I * 524 00:21:53,100 --> 00:21:56,700 * Nothing like you and I * 525 00:22:10,800 --> 00:22:12,567 - Hey. - Hurry up! 526 00:22:12,633 --> 00:22:14,233 We were supposed to be downstairs in ten 527 00:22:14,300 --> 00:22:15,967 ten minutes ago. 528 00:22:16,067 --> 00:22:17,900 - Oh. Uh, yeah, I'm not so sure about that. 529 00:22:17,967 --> 00:22:19,300 I don't think there's gonna be a wedding. 530 00:22:19,367 --> 00:22:20,900 - What? 531 00:22:20,967 --> 00:22:23,233 - Yeah, Josh came over here last night and-- 532 00:22:23,300 --> 00:22:25,300 - Have you seen outside? 533 00:22:27,133 --> 00:22:30,500 - Oh. Mwah. Good. - Good to see you. 534 00:22:30,567 --> 00:22:32,633 - But he was gonna tell Clare it was off. 535 00:22:32,700 --> 00:22:34,833 - Well, he's got a funny way of showing it. 536 00:22:34,900 --> 00:22:36,900 Come on, get dressed. I want to get a good seat. 537 00:22:42,400 --> 00:22:44,867 Sorry. Thanks. 538 00:22:47,300 --> 00:22:48,333 - Mobile. 539 00:22:48,400 --> 00:22:49,433 - Huh? 540 00:22:49,500 --> 00:22:51,433 - It's a no-phone ceremony. 541 00:22:51,500 --> 00:22:53,767 - Right. Sure. 542 00:23:02,133 --> 00:23:03,933 Hey. 543 00:23:04,067 --> 00:23:05,900 - Hi. 544 00:23:05,967 --> 00:23:08,067 - What happened? 545 00:23:08,100 --> 00:23:12,100 - Look, I keep-- 546 00:23:12,167 --> 00:23:14,467 I keep coming back to you, Liza, 547 00:23:14,533 --> 00:23:17,833 even when I know I should move on. 548 00:23:17,900 --> 00:23:23,233 And...I-- 549 00:23:23,300 --> 00:23:25,700 I need to put a ring between us. 550 00:23:42,100 --> 00:23:44,067 - This feels really weird. 551 00:23:44,100 --> 00:23:45,767 - Yeah. 552 00:23:45,833 --> 00:23:48,133 The groom slept with his best man last night. 553 00:23:49,667 --> 00:23:51,500 - Just slept, but still. 554 00:23:51,567 --> 00:23:54,600 - Well, I screwed the mother of the bride. 555 00:24:31,533 --> 00:24:33,067 - In the Celtic tradition, 556 00:24:33,067 --> 00:24:34,700 this knot represents 557 00:24:34,767 --> 00:24:37,200 the bond of your marriage 558 00:24:37,267 --> 00:24:40,900 and the joining together of your souls for life. 559 00:24:40,967 --> 00:24:46,100 Will you seek to never give cause to break that bond? 560 00:24:46,167 --> 00:24:49,133 both: We shall never do so. 561 00:24:49,200 --> 00:24:52,567 - And so the binding is complete. 562 00:24:57,900 --> 00:25:01,833 - * I'm bad at love, ooh-ooh * 563 00:25:01,900 --> 00:25:04,100 * But you can't blame me for trying * 564 00:25:04,167 --> 00:25:05,933 * You know I'd be lying * 565 00:25:06,067 --> 00:25:10,233 * Saying you were the one, ooh-ooh * 566 00:25:10,300 --> 00:25:12,200 * That could finally fix me * 567 00:25:12,267 --> 00:25:14,100 * Looking at my history * 568 00:25:14,167 --> 00:25:19,367 * I'm bad at love, ooh-ooh * 569 00:25:19,433 --> 00:25:22,933 * Oh, oh * 40036

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