All language subtitles for Sex.2024.WEB-DL.1080p.VIAP.NORViNE.Dream.Eng

"If you, as a human being, have the capacity
to recognize goodness and beauty,

and be excited by it."

"If you have the capacity
to recognize injustice and act on it."

"If you have the capacity to recognize evil
and distance yourself from it."

-I think that's how it went.
-That's beautiful.

Why did that make you uncomfortable?

It wasn't what he said, it was ...

At first it was lovely.
He looked at me and said those words.

But then something changed,
and it felt dark and uncomfortable.

I usually can't remember my dreams,
but this one I remember in detail.

-It's lodged in my body and won't let go.
-And that's uncomfortable?

-Are you into David Bowie?
-No, not at all.

I'm not even positive
it was David Bowie, but ...

It began with me coming out of
the toilet cubicle, wherever this was,

and he stood there washing his hands,
and he looked at me in the mirror.

Our eyes met,
and then he smiled and said that.

Or something along those lines.

At first, I didn't realize it was Bowie.
I thought it was God.

-God?
-Yes, God.

Then I thought it was Anni-Frid from ABBA.

But then I realized it was David Bowie.

And he was washing his hands?
Earlier you said he was on his phone.

It changes. It's strange how dreams change
when you start talking about them.

You fill in the blanks
to create a coherent narrative.

It was Bowie, but whether he was washing
his hands or on the phone, I'm not sure.

Anyway ...

Then he looked at me and smiled,
and then he walked up to me ...

... and then you had sex?

Uh ... no.

What? No. Why would you say that?

But there was something
about the look in his eyes ...

It was calm, firm,
friendly and full of compassion.

It was like I could surrender
all my worries and just ...

He was taking charge from here.

And that felt so good.

It was only when he
walked towards me I realized that he ...

He looked at me as if I was
someone I didn't quite recognize.

Or rather ...

I didn't recognize myself
in his eyes, you know?

I'm not entirely sure.

-I don't really understand it myself.
-So how did he look at you?

It felt like he looked at me
as if I was a woman.

And then ... he said hi ...
or he sang hi, rather. Like, "Hello, you."

And I sang hi back at him.

My voice sounded strange, but that
didn't matter in the dream, somehow.

It was only when I woke up it went
from feeling liberating to feeling ...

... uncomfortable.

How odd, that he looked at you
as if you were a woman.

-Was it sexual?
-No, I ... I don't really know.

No, I've never thought about
being another gender.

Nor have I felt attracted to men.

Those feelings can arise out of the blue
even if you haven't felt them before.

I don't really think they can. Do you?

I think so.

I think ... I don't know
if I should say this.

The thing is ...

I had ...

... sex with a man yesterday.

You did? OK? A ...

A man ... Yesterday?

A client. We were sweeping his chimney.

Terje had left, and I was standing
in the kitchen chatting to this guy.

We'd found some cracks in his chimney.

And then he suddenly asked
if I wanted to have sex with him.

I thought I'd misheard him,
but then he repeated himself.

I was so taken aback I started laughing.

I said no, of course.
Thanks, but no thanks.

But ...

I couldn't get angry with him.
Or maybe I could have ...

It was just completely out of the blue.
Totally bonkers.

I walked out into the street and ...

I gave it some thought, and then ...

... I went back inside.

-And then you had sex?
-Yes.

Wow. Yeah, okay. That's ...

I'm just shocked. Maybe not shocked,
I just didn't know you were gay.

You've never mentioned ... Have you?

No, no. I'm not gay. I know that much.

I've never done anything like that.
That was the first time.

-If you're not gay, why did you do it?
-Good question.

That's the thing.
I'm not sure. Because I ...

But I think it was a bit like your dream.

Something about the way he looked at me.
I've never had ...

... anyone look at me like that,
like they're lusting for me.

-Completely shameless.
-That look, right. I don't know.

I don't think that's exactly
how David Bowie looked at me ...

I know, it was just an association. But you
look uncomfortable. I didn't want that.

But this was a client?
You can't do that.

You can't have sex with clients,
you understand that?

Yes, of course.
I don't know what happened.

But what was it like? Wasn't it weird?

Yeah, it was a different thing altogether.

But it felt good.

It was actually pretty mind-blowing,
to be honest.

You look embarrassed. I'm sorry.

-I get it. It's a bit much.
-It is a bit much, but ...

I guess I think ... I just think ...
I'm not sure quite what to think.

-Aren't you worried about STI's?
-He used a condom.

-When he took me from be...
-Yeah, okay.

But ... didn't it hurt?

Maybe a bit, but no, it was mostly ...

It was peculiar.

-So now you're ...
-What?

-Gay?
-No, no.

I don't plan on doing it again.
But it was nice, in a way.

The feeling that a complete stranger ...

... wanted me like that ...

... and just surrender to it.

No, listen. I'm sorry.

I had actually decided
I wasn't going to say anything.

It's a little ... Yeah, I don't know.

It's funny. I've never experienced
anything like that before.

But it was kind of ...

... sensational for me.

I need to talk about it.

And you're the only one
I can talk to about this.

And my wife, of course.

-You didn't tell her?
-Yes. As soon as I got home.

-How did she take it?
-She was surprised. Astonished.

But that goes for me as well. I was
bewildered, really. Physically as well.

We talked about it. She said
she didn't understand why I did it.

But neither do I, so ...

She wasn't upset? Or angry?

No, she wanted to know
if this was the first time, which it was.

She knows that. If I'd done anything
like that before, I would've told her.

-What was she meant to say?
-What she was meant to say?

You cheated. And with another man.

She could have kicked you out.

Cheated? It was just sex.
I wouldn't consider that cheating.

I don't consider having sex
with someone else cheating.

-What's cheating, then?
-Starting a relationship with someone else.

-Behind her back.
-This is a bit much.

Surely you can hear yourself.

You had sex with a man,

and you describe it
as something that just happened.

It can't be.
You must've thought about it before.

You must've been attracted to men.
It's not something you just do.

Something you do?
I've never thought about it before, truly.

But I've also never been afraid of
or wary of homosexuality.

I've just never been attracted to men.

I'm still not.

-More coffee?
-No, thanks.

What?

I have to say I'm a bit shocked.
I thought I knew you.

Well, you do.
I haven't changed just because I've ...

I hope you don't see it that way.

If so, I regret telling you.

No, we're friends.
You have to tell me what's going on.

I'm just ...

You're completely uninhibited, and I ...

I was embarrassed to walk
next to my pregnant wife,

because people could tell we'd had sex.

Do you really think
I'm completely uninhibited?

I've got my limits.
I wouldn't just do anything.

Do you think I'm completely uninhibited?

I don't really think anything.

-Have you got any more calls today?
-Yes, two.

I need to leave early, I've got this ...

That's another strange thing.

When I woke up from that dream,
there was something about my voice ...

It sounds different.
Can you hear it?

-You sound a bit raspy.
-No, it's more like ...

It's in a different register,

and when I talk,
I constantly need to clear my throat.

-And when I sing ...
-When you sing? When do you sing?

-Oh yeah, you're in that choir.
-That's it.

We have a concert coming up,
and I've got a solo.

So I've got an appointment
with a voice coach.

The conductor recommended her.
I just need to pick up Klaus first.

Voice coach, then marching band practice.

It's non-stop.

Pity we didn't get to
talk more about your dream.

I don't know how much more
there is to say about it.

-When's the concert?
-On Saturday.

We're singing a ...
It's a weird thing, actually ...

The conductor, she's ...
I think she's ... I think she's really good.

But she wants us to sing
more experimental stuff.

Okay? Is this something one can attend?

Well, yeah, but I'm not sure
it's really your cup of tea.

-Isn't that for me to decide?
-Sure, it's open to all.

-Would you rather I didn't come?
-No ...

Come if you want.
Now you're warned.

Well ...

It's ... I was just thinking ... that ...

I'd prefer it if you didn't tell
anyone about that dream.

I won't say anything.

The same goes for what I told you.

I kind of assumed
you'd keep it to yourself.

Yes, of course.

-See you at the pool tomorrow.
-Half past eight?

Half past eight.

Hi!

Hello.

-Did you work from home today?
-No, I came home after lunch.

-I've been out in the garden.
-That's nice.

Are you ready for the garden centre?
Do you know what seeds we need?

Nasturtium and lupin.

-Unless there's something in that box.
-No, there's nothing there.

Are the kids in? I thought we could grab
dinner at IKEA. I just need a shower.

-Didn't you shower at work?
-No, I rushed back.

They'll be home soon.
The school called, by the way.

-Really? Why?
-It was just a minute ago.

It seems Hans Petter has been asking his
classmates how much their parents make.

They didn't like that, then?

I reckon they've had complaints.

But listen ...

What you told me yesterday ...

I can't let it go.

No ...

I think it affected me more
than I realized.

It was the way you told me.
Like it was no big deal.

As if it was good news ...

Good news?

I guess I just ...

-I felt a bit bewildered.
-I didn't know how to react.

But I've been thinking
about it all day, and ...

You've cheated, you know.
With a man.

That doesn't make it okay.

It definitely doesn't feel okay.

It washes over me in waves.

One moment, I'm like, all right.

But then ...

... I just cry. I've been crying all day.

Hey ... Sweetheart.

Sweetie.

I didn't want it to be like this.

Sweetheart.

I understand why
you reacted the way you did.

I did something I've never done before.

Without you knowing.

It threw me too.

-How do you mean?
-I'd never thought I ...

But then I just did it.

I didn't think of it as cheating.

-I still don't.
-What is cheating, then?

I told you straight away.

So cheating is fine as long as
you tell your partner straight away?

For me, cheating is ...

-Cheating is hiding something.
-I've been thinking about this all day.

I don't understand any of it.

How could you do it?

I don't ...

-I don't know.
-And I'm thinking ... Are you gay?

-No!
-Are you sure?

I can't see any other explanation.

Sweetheart.

Having one beer
doesn't make me an alcoholic.

That's not how it works.

And I'm also wondering ...

Do you still love me?
Do you want to be with me?

Yes!

Of course I do!

It's got nothing to do with that.

I'm ... I love you.

There's no one else I love like you.

I've never loved anyone this way.

-I've never been this happy with anyone.
-So why have sex with someone else?

And a man, as well. It's completely ...

I don't understand anything.

How could you just do that?

It might sound strange
to you, but for me ...

They're completely unrelated.
It doesn't mean I care about you any less.

And I didn't think ...

Our love can't ...

... be reduced to just
not having sex with others. Can it?

Or maybe that's how it is?

When I say it out loud,
I realize that maybe it is, but ...

I've looked at it all wrong.

But I don't understand
what made you do it.

I guess I was ... I was turned on.

-I was aroused ...
-You wanted him?

Yes.

Yes, I guess I picked up on it
while we were chatting.

I could feel him looking at me.

At ... at my body.

And then he just asked me, point blank,
if I wanted to have sex with him.

I said no, but when I was outside his house
and had a chance to think, I ...

I realized I was actually really turned on.

And then ... Yeah.

So ...

No, this is ...

I can't make sense of this.

You're saying it wasn't cheating, it was
just sex, it had nothing to do with us.

Would you have felt the same
if it was a woman?

I don't know, really.

No, I don't think so.

I'm sure I wouldn't.

But this was just
something completely different.

The fact that he looked at me ...

... as someone who might
want to have sex with him ...

-That ...
-You were flattered?

Did you enjoy it?

I guess ...

Yes, it felt good.

Yes, it did.

And you didn't think about me?

No, I didn't, to be completely honest.

But you can't just have sex
with everyone you fancy.

I mean, you can, but ...

But ...

But I don't.

I've never done this before.

You know that.

This is completely insane.

-Where are you going?
-I don't know.

I'm going to do some more work.

You should take that shower.

Dad?

I've been thinking about
starting my own YouTube channel.

What do you think about that?

Nothing as of yet.

-Why do you want to do that?
-I feel like my grades aren't good enough.

Stop it.
You're getting B's across the board.

Yeah, but I'm not getting any A's.

I'm nowhere near the top of the class.

I'm mediocre.

-Alice has a YouTube channel.
-Put away your phone.

You're not mediocre ...

-Does Alice have a YouTube channel?
-Yes.

-Why does she have that?
-I don't know ...

I guess she's figured out
there's money to be made.

But is she making money?

No, not yet.
But she has a lot of viewers.

She says lots of brands have asked
her to talk about their products.

"A lot of", not "lots of".

-What does she talk about?
-All kinds of things.

She talks about
what she likes and dislikes.

She talks about
her mental health problems.

If she buys a new eyeliner,
she makes a video about it.

But she also talks about
things we've done in class.

She'll repeat normal,
funny stuff someone said.

She doesn't come up with much of it
herself. Almost nothing, actually.

But when she repeats something
I said on her YouTube videos,

it becomes more ...

Not more important, exactly,
but ... it becomes something.

You know?

Yeah. I guess ...

Anyway. I think her skin
has improved as well.

As a result of her YouTube channel?

-Is that why you want to start one?
-No. My skin isn't that bad, is it?

But I need to make a living.
What else can I do?

Without good grades,
I won't get a good job. Or a pension.

-Pension?
-Yeah.

-Why are you talking about your pension?
-Someone talked about it in class.

Jesus, you're thirteen!
You can't be talking about your pension!

-What should we talk about, then?
-That's not what matters.

Pension, comparing yourself to others ...
None of that matters.

You've got great grades.

Compared to who?
I think about it all the time.

I'm ... I'm not good enough.

Yes. You are.

You can't be so hard on yourself.
Where has this come from?

I guess we're to blame
for how you've turned out.

-It's not your fault.
-Yes. All the bad stuff is our fault.

-Now you're being hard on yourself.
-You saying that is also our fault.

-So no YouTube channel.
-No, that's ...

-I think ...
-All right.

-Are you still working?
-Yes.

Am I interrupting?

When you said that you're in more pain
than you've ever been in ...

That just kills me.

I didn't want it to be like this.

I'm sorry.

Is there anything I can do?

I don't know ...

Why are you wearing jogging bottoms?
We're going to the garden centre.

I'll change before we leave.

-Hey ...
-I don't know.

I think what hurts the most is that ...

I don't know you ...

... anymore.

I don't know who you are.
I can't trust you.

Maybe that's not a big deal, but ...

What if you want to do this again?

I won't. I told you.

How can you say that? You just did it.

And you said you liked it.
How can I trust you?

Because I'm telling you.

-I promise.
-You can't make that promise.

Sexual urges aren't
that easily controlled.

Okay? Wait ... Why not?

That's just the way it is.

Is it? Okay.

-You're just full of cliches.
-Oh really?

That's just nonsense.

You know that.

Of course you can control
your sexual urges.

And we've been ... Think about it,
we've been together for twenty years.

I've been trustworthy the whole time.
Why can't you believe me now?

I just ...

I'm not even sure
I want you to promise me.

Definitely not if it's
just because you think I can't handle it.

I want you to be free
to do whatever you want.

That's what love is. Loving someone
unconditionally, setting them free.

"If you love somebody, set them free."

I'm not doing that if I make you
promise me something against your will.

But I want to do it.
I want to do it because I love you.

Because I don't want you
to feel insecure and sad. What?

I wanted you to say that you
wouldn't do it because you didn't want to.

That would have been better
than you doing it because ...

... it makes me feel insecure and sad.

That just makes me feel fragile.

What you're really saying
is that you might do it again,

if I wasn't so weak.

What are you thinking?

-It was just sex.
-Just sex?

It's not "just sex" for me.

It's the most intimate thing we do.
It's what we share.

It's what you and I share.

We're never as close as when we have sex.

Don't you agree?

-Why are you so quiet?
-Because ...

If you're not even nodding, it feels like
you disagree or you're hiding something.

I'm sorry. But to me, intimacy is ...
this, what we share between us.

This is what's intimate to me. Not sex.

Well, sex is also intimate,
but that's just physical.

That's still there.
That's not disappeared just because ...

But ... Sorry, you weren't finished.

Just because I did that with him.

But that's precisely the point.

Now you've shared that with someone else.

Take your face when you're coming.

You look so vulnerable,
and it's the closest I ever feel to you.

I want to be the only one who sees that.

I just ... I don't think I've ever ...

Maybe there's a vulnerability there,
but it's not ...

You want to own that facial expression?

It sounds horrible
when you say it like that.

I just want to be the only one who ...
There's nothing strange about that.

No, but ... When I go to
the chiropractor or the barber,

that's also someone else touching me.

But you can't compare those.

You can't compare sex
and physical treatment.

Both involve someone else touching me,
causing reactions and facial expressions.

That's not the same.
You know what I mean.

What about me?
What about my face when I come?

-Do you want someone else to see that?
-I guess not ...

I don't think
I've thought about it that way.

We're so close when you come,
so I don't really know what you look like.

That's because you close your eyes.

Do I?

Maybe I do.

I feel you in my body, of course,
but your face ... I don't know.

You must have seen it.

I can't think straight right now.

-Did you see his facial expression?
-No.

But you ... felt him in your body?

I have to ask. I don't know how
men have sex with each other.

-Like, what did you do?
-What we did?

No, I mean ...

I don't know if I want to talk about it.

Why not? You don't usually
mind talking about sex.

No.

He started ...

He started ...

... by touching me.

My groin.

Outside my trousers. And then ...

Did you touch him back?

What else?

Then, he ...

Then he undid my fly and ...

This is unnecessary.
You can imagine what happened.

No, I can't. I want you to tell me.

All right. Well, he ...

He started ... touching me, on my ...

Did you undo his fly as well?

Did you kiss him?

-Yeah, I had to.
-You had to?

Well, I did.

And then ...

Did you just stand there
and touch each other?

Did you do anything else?
Please answer me.

Please.

We stood like that for a bit, and then ...

-And then, I guess he took me from behind.
-You "guess"?

He fucked you in the ass?

Did you have anal sex?

Yes.

Yeah, I ...

Was he ...

Or, what did he look like?

He was a bit older than me.

Taller.

His hair was thinning.

Fat? Skinny?

A bit stockier than me.

-Was he handsome?
-Handsome? No ...

Quite charming, I guess.

-He was very friendly.
-Friendly?

Wasn't it painful?

Yes, a bit, maybe. At first.

And then it felt good?

Did he come?

And you, did you come too?

But...

It's... What was it like ...

Was your ass sore afterwards?

Yeah, I guess. A bit.

A bit?

I don't want to talk about this.

Surely you can tell me
whether your ass was sore after?

Yes, it was a bit sore.

-Hello!
-Hi!

I'm done talking about this.

It was just completely different. Okay?

I'm not going to do it again.

What's up?

I can explain.

My son here is in a marching band
and I sing in a choir.

Several of the people in the choir
have children in the marching band.

Because the choir conductor
also conducts the marching band.

She's recruited us,
and she's very ambitious.

Now we're having a joint concert,
and I'm singing a solo.

And that ...
I don't have much of a voice ...

What kind of choir is it? A church choir?

It's just a normal choir.

But over the last few days,
my voice has sounded so different.

-Different?
-It just changed all of a sudden.

-Changed how?
-Have you seen this before?

-How has it changed?
-It's become ... more ...

It's drier, and higher, and further back.

It's hard to explain.
It's just the past few days.

Has something happened?
Something that might have stressed you out?

I'm not a psychologist,
but it's not unheard of

for people to have experiences
which deeply affect them.

Not necessarily anything traumatic,
just something that ...

Something stress-inducing,
which can affect the voice.

Uh ... I don't know, really.

I sing in the shower, and yesterday
my voice suddenly sounded so different.

I feel like my speaking voice
has changed as well.

Your speaking voice too?
Do you have a sore throat?

No, it's not really that.

You wouldn't know if I sound different,
since we've never met before.

Does he sound different to you?

Not really. Maybe a bit higher?

Let's hear it, then.

-If you ...
-What do you want me to sing?

Anything. Sing whatever
you were singing in the shower.

Ingerid Sletten from Sildejord
Had neither silks nor fur

Just a little cap made of coloured wool
That her mother had given to her

Great!
But when you were singing now ...

It sounds like
you might have a tongue blockage.

The tongue is a muscle,
and if it tenses up for whatever reason,

it can become
an obstruction in the oral cavity.

And that can affect
the sound of your voice.

Let's see.

Can you just stick your tongue out?

-Like this?
-Is that as far as it goes?

I'm going to stretch it
and see if the muscle relaxes.

Does it hurt?

It's uncomfortable,
but I can feel it relaxing.

If you can get rid of
whatever is causing that resistance,

you will have greater control
of your voice.

Okay.
But what's caused this? A tense tongue?

It could be a number of things.
But it's most likely up here.

And here.

And maybe here.

I don't want to harp on
about the stress thing, but ...

Our lives are full of events
we have to react to in some way.

And even if it's not something major,
it can still feel challenging.

Have you heard about or read
anything by Hannah Arendt?

No.

She was a philosopher.

I just finished this book,
and I recommend it to everyone.

She ... wrote a lot about freedom.

What freedom is and how to attain it.

And she draws a distinction
between the social and public spheres.

In the social sphere,
we are preoccupied with

identity and belonging to a group.

We're concerned with fitting in
and being acknowledged.

But Arendt thinks
humans are so much more.

And that we shouldn't be reduced to
whatever is acceptable to a small group.

She argued that everyone
is unique as individuals

and that we need to be
part of a greater community

which allows for
differences and disagreement.

where we can be
subjectively thinking individuals.

And that is the public sphere.

So whereas the social sphere is fertile
soil for totalitarianism and fascism,

the public sphere facilitates
the liberation of the individual.

That's in brief,
and in my own words, but ...

Is God a part of
the social or the public sphere?

God? I don't know.

I don't believe in God.

Maybe both.

But how does that relate
to the voice, do you think?

I just ...

There was just something about you
when you walked in.

I'm sorry.

Anyway, take the book.
I've already read it.

Are you ready to give it another go?

Yes.

Stick your tongue out.

That's it.

Why did you lie to the singing teacher?

You usually sing "Tell me the old, old story
Of unseen things above"

-I guess I didn't remember it.
-But you sing it in the shower every day.

Hey! We need a couple of strong men
to help us carry this fridge.

Could you lend us a hand?

Yeah, I reckon that's doable.

I've got it.

-Grab the other end.
-Hold on.

Brilliant, lads.

Brilliant.

Just put it here, and my husband
will do the rest when he comes home.

Lucky for us that you walked by.

Good stuff.

-They didn't even say thank you.
-They didn't?

They just said "great" and "brilliant".

-Is your hand all right?
-I think it got trapped.

But you can move it?
At least it's not broken, then.

A kind of portal.

-A pergola, you mean?
-Yes, that's it.

The same colour as the house?

That would be cool.

We could extend the deck.

Maybe we could put
vegetable containers over there.

Is that an idea? The boys might enjoy it.

Would you like to grow tomatoes?

It would be fun for them
to watch them grow in spring.

I can't think about gardening right now.

-What's the matter?
-I just ...

If it was me
who had slept with someone else.

How would you have reacted?

-You did.
-No, I didn't.

You did.

When we first started going out,
you slept with your ex.

That was just to make sure.
It didn't mean anything.

You were really upset and frustrated.

It was just weird that you had to sleep
with him to decide you wanted me.

I didn't understand how that
could help you decide one way or another.

What if the sex had been really good?

Would you have chosen him?

What was the reasoning?

You can't choose your partner
based on how good the sex is.

If so, relationships
would change from week to week.

Before we met,
we had sex with lots of people.

That didn't matter.
It was meaningless sex.

You said that too. It was just sex.

Now it suddenly means everything?

I don't understand what's changed.
Suddenly it's the only thing that matters.

It's because ...

That was so long ago.
Everything is different now.

I know that,
I'm just trying to understand ...

Why is it impossible
to think like that now?

What's changed? Is it our morals?

What?

-Answer me, please.
-I have to think.

I don't know what to say.

But it's definitely not about morals.

It's about the fact
that we decided to get married.

Marriage isn't just about
restricting our sexuality.

No, it's about being a couple.

Of course.

I don't know why I'm saying all this ...

... all this nonsense.

There you are!

Doesn't that hurt?

It looks painful.

What ... What is this?

A dreamcatcher. A gift from Louise.

She bought them for everyone on holiday.

Do you think it's ugly? I like it.

-Who is Louise again?
-The girl who started before Christmas.

She's been on sick leave.
She got sick almost immediately.

Very sweet girl. I've told you about her.

She looks a bit like Marit Bjørgen. And her
partner had gender-affirming surgery.

Oh yeah ...

Must be weird not recognizing
your own reflection in the mirror.

It's about more than your reflection,
don't you think?

It's not about the haircut or the face.

It's about the inside. Or maybe the eyes.

And you do whatever is necessary
to make the inside match the outside.

At its core, it's about getting to
a place where you feel free.

Isn't that why you're stretching
your tongue? To be free?

-Free from what?
-Free from, free to. I don't know.

I don't hear a difference in your voice,
but something is clearly bothering you.

Sing something.

-Tell me the old, old story
-Of unseen things above ... Yes?

Tell me the old, old story
Of unseen things above

Of Jesus and His glory
Of Jesus and His love

Yeah, you sound completely fine.

-Is there something else?
-Now you remember it.

But you couldn't
in front of the voice coach.

And you avoided telling her
it was a church choir.

-Were you embarrassed?
-No!

People are just so prejudiced.

Maybe it was a bit cowardly.
It just didn't feel right.

It's not always that easy.

I understand.
Don't think of it as cowardly.

-How's your hand?
-I can't even grab the shampoo bottle.

-Is it sprained?
-I hope not. I've got so much to do.

Sewing and playing.

I can't play the cornet like this.

If it's not better tomorrow,
we'll go see the doctor.

It has to be.

Sleep tight. Good night.

Hans Petter doesn't understand why
you can't ask people how much they make.

What did you tell him?

He doesn't understand
why it offends people.

But I think it was
quite uncomfortable for him in the end.

He thought we were making a lot.

But it turns out most of
the other parents make a lot more.

Can you keep your pants on?

Hey ...
It can't be like this.

Can you please forgive me?

Do you think you could?

I'll never do it again. I promise.

The libido is so strong,
I don't think you can control it.

-If so, it could happen to you too.
-No.

I don't want to have sex with anyone else.

That's the difference between us.
I don't, but you do.

No, I don't.

I don't know what else I can say.

Desire is ... something that just
comes over you, out of the blue.

It's not something you can control.

I could suddenly want ... lots of things.

But feeling desire
is not the same as acting on it.

Acting on that desire is a choice.

But I don't know if I can promise
to never desire anyone else.

If you want to ... own both
my body and my thoughts.

Do you know what?

I want you to own it.

If that makes you happy.

I want you to be happy.
It's the only thing I want.

-I want you to be happy too.
-But I'm happy when you're happy.

But that ... That's not good.

The worst part is ...

The worst part is that
a part of me ... is jealous of you.

I can admit that I've had thoughts ...

I've wanted to do something like that too.

But when you did that,

it was so damned ...

It's so damned painful
being on the other side.

I didn't realize it would hurt this much.

Maybe that's it.
I'm sure you didn't either.

No, not at all.

That's the awful thing,
because in theory ...

And this is the truth ...

In principle, I think
we should both have that freedom.

But if that freedom is so painful ...

Can I endure that?

Right now, I don't know if I want to be
in this relationship anymore.

What do you mean?

Do you want to break up?

I just don't understand
how we can ... move past this.

I don't know.

I feel completely ...

Completely lost.

Hey.

No, please don't. I can't. I'm sorry.

-Do you want me to sleep somewhere else?
-Yes, maybe.

No, you stay.

I can't lie in this bed.

What is it?

My dreams ...

They've been unsettling lately.

What are they about?

I'm dreaming that I ...

Is the skin peeling on your back?

-What?
-Yes!

Your skin is really dry.
Is it dry elsewhere as well?

Look at this!

That's a bit unpleasant.

-Maybe it's psoriasis or something.
-What?

You should get it checked out.

Hey!

-Is something wrong?
-No.

How's your hand?

It's so painful I can't button my shirt.

My goodness. Let me see.

Is it swollen?

It's not broken, at least.

Can you take Klaus
to the doctor this afternoon?

Then you can ask about
the skin thing while you're there.

-This is my old shirt.
-Yes?

I'm off to work.
Will you take the kids to school?

How are you doing?

I'm confused.

-I think I need to talk to someone.
-You can talk to me.

Someone else.
I'm meeting Hanne after work.

I see.

Are you going to tell her everything?

Yes ...

-Are you uncomfortable with that?
-It's just that it's about me.

It's about me too.

Where are you meeting her?
Are you having dinner?

We're just getting coffee
at a café near work.

I'll let you know
if we end up getting dinner.

Bye.

Hey.

-Were you in a good mood that day?
-What do you mean?

Yeah, I guess. Why do you ask?

Your back is straight
when you're in a good mood.

Bursting with confidence.
That's very attractive.

It's like you're open
to anyone or anything.

My mum used to call it being easy.

I don't know.

Why are you so stupid?

This is a fire trap in its current state.

-Shall I come up?
-Yes.

I think you should.

Okay.

Hey.

Are you alright?

I'm sorry, I had a dizzy spell.
I started shaking.

I see. Terje is on a job around the corner.
Why didn't you call him?

He was going to the hardware store,
so I thought I'd rather call you.

Okay. Do you want help getting down,
or should we just sit for a bit?

People are so strange. These people
had covered the fireplace with wallpaper.

-I've seen that before.
-I know, it just upset me.

And all day I've been thinking about
what I told you yesterday.

My wife and I
were talking all night last night.

-I've hardly slept.
-I thought it might be that.

It wasn't that easy after all?

Maybe I shouldn't have told her.

But that wouldn't have felt right.

Then it would feel like cheating.

-Am I way off base?
-I don't know ...

At least you know what you're feeling.

Still, I can't quite believe
you thought it would be that easy.

That was perhaps a tad naive.

You tried to do the impossible.

I haven't tried to do anything.

I'm so worried
everything is ... unravelling.

No, that's ... Well, maybe ...

If it's any consolation,
you're not the only one.

-Did you dream you were a woman again?
-Yes. Well, not that I was a woman, but ...

... that people look at me
as if I were a woman.

-But it was the same dream?
-Yes. Or no. David Bowie was there.

Or he showed up after a while.
We were at a party, on this sofa, and I ...

And you were there. All the lads were there,
just laughing and joking.

Then David Bowie walks in
with someone else.

He spots me across the room
and comes over.

He looks at me
as if he's really happy to see me.

I stand up and give him a hug.

And I can tell you all
are impressed that I know him.

And ...

He puts his hand out, and I take it,
and then we walk out into something ...

... green ... and bright ...

And as we're walking,
it feels like I'm growing taller.

This sounds completely nuts,
but for me ...

He put his hand on my back like this
and pushed me forwards.

And I can feel something
in my body, a lightness.

A possibility that ...

-But when I wake up ...
-It's uncomfortable.

It actually sounds really nice.

They're all nice things.

You're so open.

What's your opinion of me?
What do you think about me?

My opinion of you?

You're a really nice bloke.

-Yeah?
-You're funny.

You're a great superior.
Always very clear.

Caring.

And you're Christian.
Maybe that's part of it.

-Do I talk about that a lot?
-No, never, really.

I don't think it affects
my opinion of you.

But maybe it affects you.

How's your wife doing?

She's devastated. I can't blame her.

I've hurt her in a way that ...

She's going to talk to
one of her girlfriends about it today.

I don't know.

I understand why she needs it, but ...

It still feels like a betrayal.

-But you've talked to me about it.
-I don't know what her version is like.

How it'll make me look.

She could say ...

I don't think that's fair.

You have to trust that she talks
about you the way you talk about her.

I can see why she needs to discuss it
with someone, get another perspective.

What's her friend like?

My wife says your life is shaped
by those you speak to.

So you have to talk to people who make
the world bigger, not smaller.

I don't know ...

Her name is Hanne. I guess she's ...

... someone who makes the world smaller.

-How was school today?
-Alice got her period.

She had really bad cramps.

She's making a YouTube video about it.

Oh.

-Does she talk to you about it?
-That's not so strange, is it?

She says I give her the best feedback.

But when it comes to her period, I don't ...

I asked her to describe the pain,
and she said she was nauseous

and that it felt like she'd eaten metal.

And that she had cramping
all the way down her legs.

And she has to deal with that
her whole life. That seems unfair.

Not her whole life. It stops at a point.

-Mum still gets her period?
-Yes.

But in a couple of years,
she'll go through menopause.

And then ...

... that part ...

... will be over.

How did you respond?
What did you say?

I told her ...

What you tell me
when I think about death.

One day we'll all die,
but on all the others we will not.

-You told her that?
-I told her she should think that way.

Some days you're on your period,
but every other day, you're not.

Klaus Melbye?

Yes.

I'll bandage it, and you can buy
a splint at the chemist.

And it might be a good idea
to take some pain killers.

-Like ibuprofen?
-Or Voltarol. Do you usually take ibuprofen?

He doesn't take anything.

A girl in my class takes it.
She says it works.

-Oh yeah?
-For the period pains, you mean?

Yeah. Can you do anything
to relieve really bad period pains?

Does your friend have that?

-Really bad.
-I see.

If they're really bad,
she should see a doctor.

Since it signals fertility, some cultures
regard period pains as holy.

They think our fertility
makes women goddesses.

So the period and the pain
becomes a celebration of that.

The pain is to be endured bravely.

It will strengthen you as a goddess.

It's quite powerful and optimistic.
Can you tell your friend that?

-If your mum heard that ...
-Would she disagree?

I don't think she subscribes
to the goddess stuff.

She's Christian.

I think it's more that ...

... her periods are tough,
and that she doesn't feel like a goddess.

I don't personally subscribe
to the goddess theory myself.

But I can see their point,
because giving birth is a special thing.

To have your body become
the arena for the drama that is childbirth,

that's indescribable.

The body becomes a battlefield, of sorts.

There are limits,
but we want to be conquered.

It's a unique feeling of being nature.

And having sex
during the last trimester is ...

That's very special. That your body
can accommodate three people.

That is ... Oh, well.

That's what our periods promise.

So I have to say I miss it a little.

Right.
You've got children?

A daughter who's a surveyor
and a son who wants to be a comedian.

He hasn't got a funny bone in his body, but
I've understood that's not a requirement.

But my daughter, she's funny.

She gave me those images on the wall.
Do you see what it is?

It's a pair of ducks.

And if you see ducks at the doctor's,
they might be quacks.

I'll write you
a prescription for Voltarol.

And I'll refer you to get x-rays.

Aren't you going to ask about your back?

No, that's ...

Is there something with your back?
I've got time.

I suddenly got this annoying ...

Swap seats, and I'll look at it.

I've had some skin changes.

Let's see here.

I just have to lift this up.

You've got dry skin.

You're shedding the outer skin,
and underneath it's all healthy skin.

Nothing red or sore.
No signs of eczema or psoriasis.

Isn't it a bit odd?
I haven't been out in the sun or anything.

Just use moisturizer and a high
SPF cream if you're working outdoors.

And I'd hold off on getting
a tattoo for the moment.

That's not an issue.

-I'd like one.
-Would you?

-I think that's nonsense.
-Why?

People should do what they want,
but I think the skin is fine as it is.

People get tattoos
because it makes them feel special,

but no matter how special the tattoo is,
it covers up something truly unique.

All the marks and irregularities
which make our skin completely unique.

I'm not a fan.

We have a teacher who's got a tattoo
which says, "I love my family".

Sounds like serious phantom pains
disguised as empathy.

I can see her waking up one day feeling like
she's tattooed a stranglehold on herself.

Then she'll ask me
to remove her family with lasers.

Can I tell you about a patient I had once?
Or two patients. It was a couple.

Architects, both of them.

They met and fell in love
studying architecture.

After graduating,
they bought a flat and moved in together.

I considered their relationship
to be rock solid.

They had similar tastes,
they dressed and spoke the same way.

They frequently discussed politics

and wanted a society with higher
taxes and redistribution of wealth.

Yet they had to admit
they felt safer on the right.

Even after several years, they were still
in love and never tired of each other.

And like all couples, they liked different
things about each other's bodies.

One had a beautiful line
going from his shoulder

which never failed
to arouse his boyfriend.

There was a mole
on the back of his shoulder

which made him weak in the knees.

And for his birthday, what do you get your
architect boyfriend who has everything?

Our architect wanted to give him
something personal, an act of devotion.

An act expressing
his bottomless love for his boyfriend.

And since he knew that his boyfriend
was mad about the back of his shoulders,

he went ahead and had it tattooed

with the three words he knew
his boyfriend cherished above all others.

The excitement was not
as immediate as he had hoped.

The birthday boy
was disappointed at first,

as you can be when you get
a present you didn't really want.

He tried to smile,
even though he felt his boyfriend

had defaced
the most beautiful part of his body.

It felt like a betrayal.

He also thought the typeface was wrong.

And since he couldn't
tell him how he really felt,

he said it was a weird choice
to go with a Le Corbusier typeface

for a Frank Lloyd Wright tattoo.

He heard how cruel it sounded.

He knew that the worst thing you can tell
a newly tattooed architect is

that he chose the wrong typeface.

The newly tattooed wept with regret.

He said he'd been thrown off by the
aggressive interior of the tattoo parlour.

And that the tattoo artist had been
much more attractive than he'd expected.

But whatever the reasons,
it was too late for regrets.

It was irreversible.

Like an accident.

Who is Frank Lloyd Wright?

A famous American architect.

Did he come to you to get it removed?
Did they break up?

No. Luckily, people aren't that shallow.
It takes more than that.

And they loved each other.

The man the tattoo was meant to honour,
learned to appreciate it.

He grew to regard it with tenderness.

The reason they came to see me
was something else entirely.

Unfortunately.

-I still want a tattoo.
-I kind of want one too, now.

Hi. Are you home?

-I thought you were meeting Hanne?
-I just got home.

-Where have you been?
-I've just been ...

... walking around all afternoon.

-What about the kids?
-They're next door. They called.

-Are you writing?
-Yeah, it's ...

Yeah, I ...

-Where did you walk?
-Just around. Downtown.

I sat on the pier by City Hall for a bit.

A bride and groom came
and wanted a photo with me.

You know, it's considered good luck

to meet a chimney sweep
on your wedding day.

Did you have sex with them too?

I'm sorry. That was ...

I'm sorry.

How was it seeing Hanne?

It was enlightening.

-What did she say?
-She thinks it's grounds for divorce.

If Knut had come home and told her that,
she'd have kicked him out.

But you know, that's Hanne.

You don't think that way?

No.

But it felt good talking to someone else.

I've been so tense.

My body has tensed up.

I began crying as soon
as I started talking about it.

But after a while, I could feel how saying
it out loud had loosened something.

By the end, we just
sat there laughing, all three of us.

-It felt nice.
-Laughing?

All three of you?

Hanne brought a friend, Bjørn.

So you told him everything too?

Well, he was there.

He's a psychologist,
so he had his own take on it.

-Is that so? And what was that?
-He mostly just asked questions.

He said I needed to organise my thoughts

and claim ownership of the narrative.

-Ownership of the narrative?
-The story, then.

This isn't a story. It's something
that's happened to us, our lives.

Is that work you're doing?

Nope.

Bjørn said it might help if I wrote down
what I'm thinking and feeling.

I guess that's not something
you want me to read.

Would you want me to read it?

Read away.

"It's what he does
rather than what he says ..."

It sounds dumb when you read it out loud.

What do you mean by that? What I do,
not what I say? I say lots of things.

Right now, what you're saying
doesn't mean that much.

It's what you do,
your actions, I care about.

Maybe that's why I was so hurt.

When you cheated, it was an action
that excluded me completely.

I wasn't part of your world
when you gave your body to someone else.

Did you write that down?
That I gave my body to someone else?

I've written everything. The whole story.

Everything you told me. Everything
that happened at that guy's house.

The whole story? In your own words?

Of course it's in my own words.

Hey. What are you thinking right now?

I don't know.

It's like you're making it your story,
in a way.

This happened to me too.

-What are you guys doing up so early?
-Klaus got up at five.

-How's the hand?
-Better.

I took down that dream catcher.

Why? Don't you like it?

Turn it inside out and check.

What would you think if I told you that I
keep dreaming I meet David Bowie,

and that he looks at me as if I'm a woman?

How do you interpret that?
That it's a suppressed wish?

It just does something to me.

-Something bad?
-Maybe not.

-Oh no!
-It feels like ...

It's inside out.
You have to undo it.

That goes on the other side.

Do you ever feel like life is just about
limiting and constricting yourself?

This sounds a bit like a mid-life crisis.

Maybe that's it.
I'll stop going on about it.

No, keep talking.

So he looks at you like you're a woman.
Do you feel like you're a woman?

No, I ... Or, what does that feel like?

How do I explain that?

Does it feel like something's wrong
with your body?

Is there a dissonance between
how your body feels and how it looks?

No, I'm ...

I'm reasonably happy with my body.

And you don't have an urge
to put on women's clothes?

Not at all.

It's not about that.

It feels like it goes deeper than that.
It's hard to explain.

I think it's the fact that he looks at me
in a way no one has ever done.

And it's so powerful that
it's still in my body when I wake up.

It stays with me all day.

In what way? Is it uncomfortable?

At first, I thought so,
because it was such a new feeling, but ...

... now I kind of like it.

It's like I see things differently
because someone looked at me differently.

Don't tell anyone this,
but a mate from work, he ...

He had sex with another guy.

-And I think that ...
-Was it ...?

Yes, but don't ask who.

Don't ask. The point is,
he's not actually gay.

No? I think that's up for debate
if he had sex with another man.

Homosexuality isn't just
an identity, it's also an activity.

One he has participated in if he has,
indeed, had sex with another man.

That's how you see it.

But we were talking about me, and I ...

When he told me
about this sexual encounter,

he said that he'd never had anyone look
at him the way this guy looked at him.

It had nothing to do with me,
but I could relate to that bit, you know?

Not really.

This isn't about sex, with you?

No, it doesn't.

It's about ...

... expectations. That ...

You're used to people expecting so much,
and then you try to live up to that.

It felt good to be looked at
without those expectations.

What are you thinking?

I don't quite understand ...

So he looks at you as if you were a woman.

I don't understand
what's so liberating about that.

Being objectified or defined by others
is not something I've ever enjoyed.

Maybe it's not that
he's looking at me as if I'm a woman,

but that he's looking at me
as neither woman nor man.

That he just looks straight to my core.

It's such a benevolent,
open gaze, without reservation.

There were no expectations.
I was free to be whoever I want.

Whoever that is.

Sounds more like God than Bowie.

If we were able to meet
each other with the assumption

that love is the way and the goal.

If we were able
to meet each other in that spirit,

we would be much freer
in our interactions.

If we approached every situation
as an opportunity to do good.

Like the guy on the radio who said the only
thing worth competing in is kindness.

It's hard to imagine,
but it's a scenario in which everyone wins.

I don't think you should look
at these dreams as a problem.

You could think of it as something nice.

Think of it as God's way of saying
you can contain everything.

You can rest in that knowledge.

-What are you making?
-Your outfit.

It's going to look great.

The fact that she's told others about it
and written about it

makes me really sad.

Maybe I'm being childish,
but it really threw me off-balance.

It didn't feel like mine anymore.

I feel like that around eloquent people.

They're in control of the situation.
They have the power, while I'm just ...

-Maybe it's because I'm dyslexic.
-I'm dyslexic as well.

I still have words ...

I don't know.

I have to ask:
Are you sure you're not gay?

You've asked me that already.
As has my wife.

Maybe you don't believe me,

I think you can have sex
with a man without being gay.

Do you think I was wrong to do it,
from a moral standpoint?

-Because I'm Christian?
-Yes.

I don't think Jesus
came to earth in order to ...

... protect the nuclear family
or interfere with people's love lives.

On the contrary.

I'm just really glad you felt
comfortable sharing it with me.

That you trust me even if I'm Christian.

But that's also why I trust you.

I often think about
when you told me you were Christian.

It looked like that was difficult for you.

And I can understand that.

But that you found the courage
to tell me meant an awful lot.

I thought about that when deciding
to tell you this. I wasn't sure.

But then I thought:

Admitting you're Christian must be worse
than admitting you've slept with a man.

It meant so much to me
that you trusted me enough to tell me.

But do you think it was
wrong of me to do that?

I'm not sure how to respond.

You hurt your wife.

I can't approve of that.

No, me neither.

But you wish it wouldn't have hurt her?

Yeah, I guess that's true.

I guess I wish that too.

Because when you told me, it seemed like
you'd had a wonderful experience.

-I don't know how wonderful it was.
-Sensational, was the word you used.

And when you experience
something really wonderful,

you should be able to appreciate it.

Even if you feel like your wife
has diminished it by talking about it,

you don't have to do the same.

It was your experience.

You remember being penetrated.

You can keep that to yourself.

Treasure it in your heart,
like the Virgin Mary.

The boys are in the car.
Are you ready to go?

Can I say something before we go?

Sorry to keep harping on about this.

If we are going to be completely free ...

Give each other that freedom ...

Live without limitations,
commitments or obligations ...

But we're still a couple, like you said.

Yes ...

We have love for one another.

That is an obligation
whether we want to or not.

Love feels so fragile. So transient.

Yeah ... Is it hard to trust it?

What if you think of ...

... love as a choice?

That I've chosen you.

And you've chosen me.

Yeah ...

Maybe.

-Hi!
-Hello.

Wow!

-It's my outfit.
-I see.

-My son made it.
-Really? That's impressive!

-With a sprained hand, to boot.
-It looks professional.

-Is it just you?
-No, my wife and kids are here.

-Hello.
-Hi.

-You look great.
-Thanks.

-Hi!
-Hi.

Well? Are you ready?

Well, I ...

-Are you nervous?
-A bit excited, maybe.

Good luck.

His son made the outfit.

For I know

the plans I have

for you

declares the Lord

Plans for welfare

And not for evil

To give you a future and a hope

For I know the plans

I have for you

To give you a future and a hope

Subtitles by Nortext