All language subtitles for Wiseguy S03E19 - Let Them Eat Cake

- [Narrator] Tonight on Wiseguy.

- My dream for the
town, for all of us,

it's about to be realized.

- Everyone here is
a Stepford wife.

- [Man] Don't worry
about our boy.

You're not gonna find Vince

if Vince doesn't
want to be found.

- If we do it exactly
by the numbers,

we can get Volchek.

- What are you doing here?

- I'm repaying a
debt to a friend.

- What the hell is this place?

- It's the big chill.

- You know where
he is don't you?

- [Man] I don't because
he knows if I knew

and you asked me I'd tell you.

Honesty sucks
doesn't it buckwheat?

(dramatic music)

- [Narrator]
Previously on Wiseguy.

(electricity crackling)

- Vince?

Vince?

- [Vince] No more.

- He's gone, he's
snapped, he took my car.

- This is a collect call.

You owe me and I'm
calling to collect.

- I'm here to help you Frank.

You're not going to find anybody

better than me and you know it.

- This is Roger LoCocco.

You do what he tells you.

- Helmut Zimbrik is
coming here tomorrow.

It's the final hurdle
and we're free.

- Frank, look at this.

Volcheks are one fun family.

- [Frank] Poor bastard thinks
he's creating a dynasty.

(growling)
(screams)

- I got a rundown on Zimbrik.

He's been selling permits for
health facilities for years.

He's under investigation
by the state.

In fact, they're just
about to bust him.

- Well can you get
'em to hold off

until he's done his
deal with Volchek?

- It's already done.

- [Frank] You know I
think the only reason

I'm buying into this
situation is the off chance

that Terranova will
come to his senses.

- [Lifeguard] He's
not coming back Frank.

(somber music)

- The job is making pickups.

We contract the removal
of waste materials

from hospitals and
other health facilities.

The job is what it is.

500 a week, no health
plan, no advancement.

You show up here in the
morning sober, you work.

- And I want to be
paid cash up front.

- With the disappearing
acts I get,

no one gets paid up front.

- Okay but if I
don't get some money

by tonight I'm going
to lose my room.

- What was your last job?

- I did some dock work back
east, you know, odd jobs.

- Another entrepreneur.

I'm not gonna stand
around and wait for you.

You show up here in the morning,

and I'll pay you for the
previous day's work, that help?

- Yeah it does, thanks.

- Any problems on the
job, you take it up

with your field supervisor
but I got to tell ya,

he don't like problems.

- Who's my field supervisor?

- Me.

- Hi Max how are ya?

- Hey I thought you
left, Mr. McPike.

- Believe me Max,
I wish I could.

You know where
sheriff LoCocco is?

- He's overseeing Mr.
Volchek's task force.

- Task force?

- Well this is a very
big day for Lynchborough.

Mr. Volchek's been trying to
get us a hospital for years

and the state's sending a man up

today to see if we need one.

We do, let me tell ya.

All we got now is Doc
Putney and the veterinarian.

Mr. Volchek takes
care of his own.

- Doesn't he just?

- I gotta get a haircut now.

They're free today
if you want one.

- No Max, no thank you.

- It's a beautiful day in
the neighborhood, Frank.

- Do you have any idea
where the hell Volchek is?

- Shouldn't you be in town?

- I spent all night
up there in the fog

and he never came back.

- He's up at the Corvette
Club test driving Michelle.

- [Frank] What time
is Zimbrik due here?

- Couple hours.

- All right then we
need to work quick.

I imagine Zimbrik's
on his way here

to sell a license for
the hospital to Volchek.

If he is we need to know where
and we need to know when.

- He'd have plenty of
privacy up at Transylvania.

- All right we don't
take a chance with that,

'cause we're not
gonna get another one

and the sooner we get Volchek,
the happier I'm gonna be.

I do not like it
here in Lynchborough.

I need to get out.

- I like these people.

They all look like they're out
of a Diane Arbus photograph.

- [Frank] This is
not a photograph.

- No, this is a still life.

- Excuse me is Mr. Volchek here?

- Is he expecting you?

- No but it's very
important, hello.

- Is something wrong?

There's not much I
don't know Mr. McPike,

and Mark needs to be protected.

- From who?

- Listen to me like a
good, obedient girl.

- [Woman] Paul p-please!

- You're not always
so obedient are you?

I have some friends of yours.

Little friends of yours.

- [Mark] McPike.

- Where the hell have you been?

You leave me up there
all night last night

and don't even phone me?

- You're upset.

Lacey, get him a robe.

- All right, I have
to leave Lynchborough.

- You can't, that
wasn't the deal.

- Well the deal was I'd
find somebody to help you.

LoCocco is here, there's
no reason for me to stay.

- Do you suppose you could
run a hot bath for us?

- [Woman On TV] I said nothing!

- It's okay Lacey, thank you.

There's a whole other
reason for you to stay.

Things are heating
up with the hospital.

- What things?

- Helmut's coming, a
man with your experience

in these matters
would be invaluable.

- Experience in what matters?

- Frankly I don't trust
him, he's from Seattle.

- Experience in what matters?

- Let's just say that you
both know the value of a buck.

- A crooked license broker?

- I didn't say that.
- What do you want from me?

- Protection from blackmail.

- He's gonna blackmail ya?

- No, not blackmail, the
other one, extortion.

I know enough about
leeches to know

once they're into you,
they can suck you dry.

You're a fed.

You must have
access to equipment

that will allow me to throw
this back into his face

should he try and dupe me.

- What you want me to
record the transaction?

- I'm a rich man, Mr. McPike.

I need protection.

- Let me tell you something,

if Zimbrik finds
out that I am a fed,

he is gonna take his license

and trot right back to Seattle.

This is not a brotherhood!

- Then he won't find out.

I'll tell him you're my
adviser, my spiritual adviser.

Consultant to all
my spiritual needs.

What could be more
spiritual than a hospital?

- Spiritual?

Mhmm.

(sighs)

All right, but I'm
on borrowed time.

I want to know where and when.

- My place, tonight.

You'll need to stay around
for a few days after that,

just until the license is
processed and in my hands.

You can stay at Korslava,
pick a room, there are dozens.

Pick a bed from the
tranquility parlor.

I'll have one
delivered immediately.

This one is nice, Facili.

- All right, a couple
days then it's...

In and out.

- McPike.

Bless you.

- [Man] Thought
you were leaving.

- I'm here on official business.

- The serial killings
are over, McPike.

The suspect confessed and died.

Oh I see, you're just
another hanger on huh?

Mark's got bread,
he's a needy guy,

so you're gonna fly in all
your buddies one at a time

and get everybody's
pocket lined.

(beeping)

- That's my pager.

The deal's taking
place at Korslava.

Volchek wants me to
bug the transaction.

- I'm supposed to run this
up tonight when he calls.

- All right with any
luck this time tomorrow

I'll be looking for Vince and
you'll become invisible again.

- I'm opaque now Frank.

I don't disappear for no one.

And don't worry about our boy.

You're not going to find Vince

if Vince doesn't
want to be found.

- You know where
he is don't you?

- Nope.
- You do.

- I don't because
he knows if I knew

and you asked me I'd tell you.

Honesty sucks,
doesn't it buckwheat?

(marching band music)

♪ Ta-ra-ra-boom-de-ay

♪ It's Helmut Zimbrik Day

♪ We wish that they could stay

♪ And now it's on its way

♪ Ta-ra-ra-boom-de-ay

♪ It's Helmut Zimbrik Day

♪ And we can save the day

♪ But they're here to stay

♪ Ta-ra-ra-boom-de-Ay

♪ It's Helmut Zimbrik Day

♪ We wish that they could stay

♪ And now it's on its way

♪ Ta-ra-ra-boom-de-Ay

♪ It's Helmut Zimbrik Day

♪ And we can save the day

♪ But they're here to stay

♪ Ta-ra-ra-boom-de-Ay

♪ It's Helmut Zimbrik Day

♪ We wish that they could stay

♪ But they're here to stay

(applause)

- Helmut, I'm sure you're
thinking that maybe

Lynchborough has gone a little
overboard with all of this.

But if you knew how
long we've waited

for this hospital and
what we've missed,

I stand here today thinking
about all the people

who the hospital
will be too late for.

Ollie Osterburg's appendicitis
that turned to fatality,

Tommy the tank Braumiller
and the broken leg

that was never mended, nor
was his football career.

Jane Toshida who ran out of time

in an ambulance on
the way to Seattle.

Helmut Zimbrik, two
words, two little words.

I can't help but think
somewhere in some language

they must mean thank you.

(applause)

- Thank you.

I can't take any credit for

what you are about
to do and build here.

I can only think and
pray that someone

up there may be listening.

- The marriage was doomed.

You know, we tried
to make it work

but every attempt
led to disaster.

- Did you try counseling?

The bureau's got some pretty
good shrinks on retainer.

- It was doomed all right?

I didn't need to
hear it from some guy

with initials after
his name, or her name.

You ever been married?

- No.

- See, that's the way it is.

You're stuck here,
you're isolated.

- I get out.

- This really is a nice place.

You know I could grow
penicillin in my loft.

(laughs)

- Mine was like that
too until I fixed it.

- How'd you get past the
regulations and all that stuff?

- I waded through it
until I got what I wanted.

- So what you're telling me,

is that things are
the way they are

because I want it that way.

I like bitching about it.

- Sugar?

(phone rings)

Log 1500 hours, 31490,
report center 12.

- 0129.
- Thanks.

Hey Frank what's up?

- Listen uncle, the state
attorney general's office

should be crystal clear on
the events of this evening.

If we do it exactly
by the numbers,

then we can nail 'em both.

Zimbrik and Volchek.

- I read you loud and clear.

- The money's going to be

in a Lynchborough
high school gym bag.

When they make the pass,
that's when we take 'em.

Then I can go home.

- You got it.

- Any news from Vinnie?

- Needle in a haystack, Frank.

He's gonna have to find us.

- Thanks uncle.

- For what is a
hospital, but a friend?

A building, a shady
tree to rest under.

- Thank you honey.

Kids, don't you love 'em?

(audience laughs)

Now let's segue to Doc Putney.

(applause)

- Whom shall we turn
to when all is lost?

- Give 'em the fish, Doc.

- Lynchborough, heal thyself.

(applause)

Very nice, thank you.

(applause)

- That concludes our
welcoming ceremony.

Let's all go home
now and rest up

for the fireworks
display tonight.

(marching band music)
(cheering)

Everything is all set
up for you at Korslova.

Just you and Michelle,
all to yourselves.

- Michelle?

- Oh salmon.

Big, beautiful pink fish
that swim hundreds of miles

for months at a time
waiting to spawn.

Oh it's a wonder
somewhere along the way

they don't just explode.

(laughs)

- I thought Helmut
looked a little piqued.

- Well perhaps I do
need a little nap.

- I'll send the
limo by around eight

for our candlelight soiree and
the rest of our arrangements.

We'll tidy up the deal.

♪ Ta-ra-ra-boom-de-Ay

♪ It's Helmut Zimbrik Day

♪ And when we say okay

♪ The good life's here to stay

- God.

- [Lacey] Michelle,
show Mr. Zimbrik

to the presidential suite.

- Right this way.

(gentle guitar music)

- Roger LoCocco,
renaissance man.

Sheriff, acrobat, chef.

- Toured with Basie on the vibes

and pen haikus to pestilence.

- [Lacey] Where's Luke?

- Everybody's up at Korslava
working on the Zimbrik feast.

Thought you'd be up there too

leading the hospital countdown.

- What are you doing here?

- I told you, I'm repaying
a debt to a friend.

- Is that debt repaid
when Mark's destroyed?

You bastard.

Mark trusts you.

He thinks you're working
with him, helping him.

This town exists
entirely because of Mark.

If you bring Mark down, this
whole town will crumble.

This town's frozen in time.

Every day is yesterday.

That's why it works.

It may not be the ideal place,

but maybe we're close
and we don't know it.

- You mean like
somewhere between

Walden's pond and Skinner's box?

- How do you explain
the death of ideas

to the man who's been
sent here to kill them?

This town could
have been a utopia.

It was Mark's dream,
and we were close.

It was at a point
where you felt like

when you'd wake up
tomorrow we'd be there.

- Is that why you're
in love with him?

- I loved his ideals.

So simple they're genius,

like Walden's pond.

If he's faltering it's in
learning how to let go.

He's like the father who

doesn't want to let
his kids grow up.

- And you're the mother
of his inventions

with sweets and long
naps to keep him happy.

- There's no
mothering on my part.

I'm no innocent.

It's just that I
wanted it so badly.

- Look ma, I've done
my service as acolyte

at the altar of
ideals and the service

always ends up the same.

Idealism in practice
is pragmatism.

Pragmatism slowly
slides to fatalism.

Running down the wrong
road, pedal to the metal,

pushing your future behind you!

And I'll tell you
something else I know.

You don't know what
the hell he's doing.

Your fatalistic servitude has
rewarded you with exclusion.

All that's left up here
is a big perversion.

Now you're gonna go down with it

regardless of what happens to
Mark but you don't have to.

You don't have to blindly
go down the chute,

just take what you need
to survive and walk away.

(somber music)

- Who's winning boys?

Could I have a minute please?

How's the food here Eddie?

- What the hell do you want?

- I...

Oh, how to start this?

What the hell?

My dream, my dream for
the town, for all of us.

It's about to be realized.

Don't you see?

I can finally relax,
the pressure's off.

Why am I not getting
through to you?

After all these years of
acrimony we can be friends,

real friends again.

I think you'd jump for joy.

- Is that why I'm here again?

You know this could be funny
if it wasn't so tragic.

Look what's become of us.

Look what's become of this town.

Everyone here is a Stepford wife

because of you Mark.

And now, because you say so,

we are going to turn
the clock around.

Like nothing happened.

- Everything is going
to be different.

Sheriff, I need some time here.

- Can't, waiting
for a phone call

from the exterminator
up at Korslava.

- Exterminator?

- Bugs.

- Oh sure, of course, fine.

- Nothing's going
to be different.

You're still going to do
exactly what you want.

- I come here with
news that will bridge

decades of bitterness
and I am confronted by...

I always knew you were
jealous but I thought--

- Get off it!

I envied your money
when we were kids

'cause I was too dumb to realize

all it built was a prison.

- You're jealous of what I've
accomplished for the town.

Jealous of the legacy that
I inherited and enhanced.

- Your dad gave the
hookers toasters

and now you give the
parlor girls Corvettes.

You call that an improvement?

You've done nothing but
narcotize this town.

You've hurt a lot
of people, Mark.

- I never meant to, my
vision was global in nature.

One or two individuals--

- That's like asking
aside from that Jackie,

how'd you like Dallas?

- That's grossly unfair, Ed.

- That's the truth!

- And I suppose
you've done poorly.

- Knock knock who's there?

Rogo the town joke?

That's what you've done to me.

- Whatever I have done to you,

I have already made up for it.

I will be your friend forever,

and when I finally
open this cell

all marks on the slate, both
plus and minus are wiped away.

We will start again.

- You can't forgive yourself.

Forgiveness has
to be given, Mark.

- Take care of my friend
and don't forget his dinner.

(gentle piano music)

- I've been through
this entire place.

Every room Volchek
uses is bugged,

but if I know him the
deal will take place

in the room with
the hospital model.

I'll be wired too, uncle.

- You met Zimbrik yet?

- [Frank] Not until
dinner tonight.

- Agents from the state
attorney general's office

will be monitoring you.

You give the word,
they make the bust.

- Mkay, the word.

The word is appreciable.

Appreciable, appreciable
is the word you got it?

- Yeah we got it Frank.

Listen you could do
this one in the dark.

- Oh uncle, I feel so rusty.

First time in a long
time Vinnie's not the

guy on the other
end of the rope.

- We'll find him.
- Yeah.

- Don't worry Frank.

We'll all pull the rope.

- Thank you uncle.

- Three generations of Volcheks
have frozen the town stiff.

- What are you whining about?

People got jobs, a
parade on the fourth,

stuff you can count on from
the cradle to the grave.

- But people have
to have a chance

to learn to think for
themselves, to make mistakes.

I don't care how
misguided they are.

That's the tradition
we don't have.

- Tell me something, Rogo.

What are the odds of
Volchek relocating

to Houston or Veracruz?

- What do you mean?

- Well, maybe it's
Mussolini time.

Turn 'em upside down, pop him.

- No, no no you've
got it all wrong.

Mark is not a bad man.

You get that thought
right out of your head.

You just don't know him.

His old man's a son
of a bitch though.

Raised Mark so firmly
pressed under his thumb,

he didn't have a chance.

But I tell ya when he
went away to college,

he positively bloomed.

He found out he could
dream, he had ideals.

And he came back from college

and the old man crushed him.

Squash, splat.

No more ideals.

No more dreams.

You just don't know Mark.

- It's wonderful having so
many of my friends together.

It's like Christmas, and
Helmut is our Chris Kringle.

Please sample our poor fare.

Oh not at all, looks delicious.

Are you not joining us baron?

Just a little brandy,
I have already dined.

- [Narrator] That will
be all for now my lord.

- [Narrator] Robert,
Sir Robert, do tell us

what's been happening
on the London stage.

- I produced a play once.

I financed an off off Broadway
play when I was in college.

Lacey was there.

- He was a young, gifted
writer brimming with angst

and we believed in him.

- Opening night, the lead actor

disappeared to do a two part
Kojak and I lost my shirt.

But spiritually it was
the right thing to do,

wasn't it McPike?

McPike.

- Hm?

Mm, mhmm.

- Thank you.

(phone rings)

What?

- LoCocco, bring the bag.
- I'm on my way.

- Wait, how's Rogo?

- He's a trooper.

(laughing)

- Hurry, Helmut's
getting sleepy.

How is everything?

- Well that's the point,
you shouldn't see him.

- I'm feeling better
about this already.

When the money gets here,
if you feel I should proceed

give me a signal, a
word or something.

- How about appreciable?

- I want to be
civilized about this,

but I don't want to get screwed.

He is from Seattle.

- Rogo?

You beeped me sheriff?

- I gotta run something
up to Korslava.

Boss forgot his wallet.

Want you to keep an
eye on the prisoner.

Let him go in 10 minutes.
- Sir?

Yes sir, 10 minutes.

(somber music)

(sighs)

- The Ave Memorial Hospital

will be the jewel in
the Volchek crown.

But it's not just
the hospital is it?

It's a bosom, a big,

bountiful, life sustaining bosom

upon which the people
of Lynchborough
will someday suckle.

No, it's a battleground.

- Maybe you should
give me what I came for

so I can take this poor,
tired creature home.

- Ladies, we need a few moments.

Make yourselves at home.

- What about him?

- Spiritual counsel, Helmut

or perhaps you
folks from Seattle

feel you're above
that sort of thing.

- Humor me, Mark.

- Listen, I'll be
in the kitchen.

Call me if you need me.

- Now I am as anxious as
you are to get on with this,

but I have to be careful.

Now do you have the money?
- It's coming.

When do I get my license?

- 48 hours after I get the
money, you get the license.

You should be able to break
ground at the end of next week.

- I need that.

- Tell him it's a gift from
the people of Lynchborough.

- Yeah I know.

I thought you might
be waiting for this.

A gift from the people
of Lynchborough.

I've grown an appreciable
amount in your eyes.

- From the people of
Lynchborough, we thank you.

- State attorney
general's office.

- Sheriff, are
these men with you?

- No, but unless they have
the proper documentation

I intend to shoot
them for trespassing.

- This is a warrant issued by

state superior court
justice Howell.

- Warrant to arrest...

Well this only
names the hornytoad.

This says nothing
about Mr. Volchek.

- Mr. Zimbrik is under
investigation for conspiracy

to misappropriate
state licenses.

Mr Volchek is
suspected of duplicity.

- On what basis?

Conspiracy to share
with an elected official

a token of the
town's appreciation?

Ice doesn't get any thinner.

Better take what you
got, and don't be greedy.

- But what about my license?

What the hell is going on?

How did those men get here?

My hospital, my money,
where's my money?

- Relax Warbucks.

McPike says you're bacon
and you're squealing

about a lousy 200 grand?

We saw those flatheads
sneaking around the bushes

and we figured your boy
Helmut was being tailed

so he sent me out to the
blazer to get something heavy.

A thank you would be nice.

- For what?

For keeping me out of jail?

My hospital is gone.

Who cares about freedom?

- Mark!

- Well you just
interfered with a

federal investigation
in a big way.

- Give him a minute to
digest itself Frank.

- You know that is
a very sick man.

He's probably sucking on
a hunting rifle right now.

- You know where he
went as well as I do,

out to that stone obsession he
built for his male parentage.

He owes him an apology.

A big one.

- How could I be so stupid?

To let them in,
let outsiders in?

You warned me, Dad.

You told me, you told
me this would happen.

The river, the ice was melting.

Our dream of walking the
river again is no more.

All my life, you've lived
with my disappointments

and now in death

I disappoint you again.

Please don't hate me.

Don't hate me Daddy.

- Mark, you can't let go.

You can't give up.

- I failed them Julie,
they've given me so much

and now I've blown
my only chance

of giving them
something in return.

- Don't say that.

You haven't failed them.

You're not a failure, Mark.

- He's the biggest
failure I know.

Has everything money can
buy, except friendship.

- Oh go ahead Eddie, tell me
what's wrong with my life.

In addition to being insightful

it should offer a much
needed laugh or two.

- What the hell is this place?

- It's the big chill.

- Your grandpapa Asmar.

And there's your dad Harvard.

Empty.

Mark?

Mark, what have you
done to your folks?

- Nothing you'd understand,
nor does it matter now.

- You can't give up hope, Mark.

- Hope for what?

To bring them back to life?

- If he doesn't have
hope, he has nothing

'cause that's what
you've left him Rogo!

You and your so-called friends!

- I don't want to hear
about friendship from you.

Mark and I grew up together.

The difference is
we played as kids,

you treat him like one.

- You can't arrest this guy,
you don't know who he is.

- That is not your decision.

- He's weird, but
he's not dangerous.

You pull him out
of Lynchborough now

and this town will
be swallowed up

by the first corporate
raider that smells blood.

- Death is a very
misunderstood phenomenon.

It can be beaten with
time, with money.

- You sick bastard,
you believe that.

What's happened to you?

- What's happened to you, Ed
Rogosheske, the town crier?

The sky is falling,
everything sucks,

I've ruined Lynchborough!

- I was just trying to do
what's right for the town.

- What's right for the
town is pre-destined.

It's halfwits and selfish people

who want a Volchek at the wheel.

They don't give a
damn about his needs

or even who he is.

- I know who he is, at
least I thought I did.

The date of my accident.

You had this made for me?

You didn't think I was going
to survive the accident?

I'm alive Mark, this
contraption's a joke!

- It's not a joke, Ed.

It's your arm and leg.

(sighs)
- Damn.

- Cryonically preserved
at great expense

'til modern medicine
catches up with our dreams

and makes you whole again.

That's friendship, Eddie.

- I don't want my limbs,
I don't want 'em back!

I don't want my limbs back,
I've made my adjustments!

- Rogo!

- I want my friend back!

I just want my friend back.

(somber music)

(pleasant music)

- Well uncle, nothing's changed

except for the fact that
Volchek trusts me more

now that I kept
him out of prison.

- It was out of
your control, Frank.

I mean his guy caught wind of it

and swapped the cash,
what could you do?

- I don't know.

- What are you gonna do?

- I don't know.

I'll have to think about it,

but the fact of the matter is

if I bring him in on anything

this town will
shrivel up and die.

I don't know that I'm
prepared to do that.

- You want me there Frank?

- No, I'm all right.

And Vince?

- Absolutely nothing, buddy.

- Okay.

I'll be in touch.

- Is there anything I can do?

- No.

No.

McPike wants to go it alone.

(sighs)

And Vinnie, he's too
good to be found.

- You're his lifeguard, Dan.

At some point instinct
and intuition have
to come into play.

Nobody knows him
better than you.

Are you sure you don't
know where he is?

(sighs)

(somber music)

(dramatic music)