All language subtitles for Wiseguy S03E13 - Meet Mike McPike

- [Man] Tonight on Wiseguy.

- Frank, your wife.

- What's the matter?

- Something has to be done!

They threatened to
call the police.

- It's my father.

He's cantankerous,
he's unruly, he's rude,

treats women like squeeze toys.

- Shove your concern!

- I'm sure we can
reach a compromise.

- Compromise this!

- If you'll sign a
release form in my office,

you can take him with you.

- When you gonna get back
with your wife and son?

- [Man] I'll handle
my own problems, Pop.

- I'm not leaving
this house until you

get your life straightened out.

(exciting energetic music)

- And as these figures indicate,

deficits for the first
half of the fiscal year

are grossly disproportionate
with projections.

That must be addressed.

I would like this
discussion to proceed in a

confabulatory manner.

All regional directors will
present their budget reports

and fiscal requests
for the third quarter.

As you can see,
field expenditures
are running rampant.

The confluence of
escalating cost indices

relative to broad based
intelligence operations

does not indicate an equitable
return for dollars spent.

I allow an annual
budget by comparison

with other intelligent services
is a mere chicken feed.

(phone ringing)

- Paul Wilkerson.

Yeah, hang on.

Frank, your wife,
she says it's urgent.

- Jenny, is it Drake,
what's the matter?

- Something has to be done.

They've threatened
to call the police.

(sighing)

- You know, first of all, Jenny,

I'm sure they're exaggerating.

Second of all, I'm in
an important meeting.

- I am in the middle of
something here too, Frank,

this is not fair to me.

- What the hell's that
noise in the background?

- Will you for once put your
family ahead of your work?

Take responsibility!

- Can we help?

- No, I'm sorry,
sir, it's personal.

- Wait a minute.

- I gotta go, Vince.

Where the hell is the elevator?

- I'll go with you.

- Listen, I can
handle it, all right.

- Well, Frank--

- Will you just back off me!

I'm sorry, Vince.

I'm sorry, I'm just
up suffocating here.

- What's the matter with you?

- It's my father.

- Your father?

You told me your
father was dead.

- No, my father isn't
dead, he's alive,

he's very much alive.

(groaning)

- Ruin the surprise.

It's the surprise is
anybody can eat this.

- Mr. McPike, that
meal was prepared by

a trained nutritionist.

- Then feed it to
a trained seal.

We want real food.

- [Man] Yeah!

- We still got teeth.

- Listen, you aging delinquent.

You are disrupting
everyone's schedule.

This is lunch session.

- Lunch session, schnup session.

What are we, in diapers?

- [Man] Yeah.

- No offense, Gerdy.

(laughing)

- Come on, big Mike, chill out.

Open the doors.

- Would you eat this, Grudel?

- Not in a bet.

- [Man] Yeah, see.

- Don't we pay good
money to live here?

- [Crowd] Yeah!

- Can't we eat real
food whenever we want?

- [Crowd] Yeah!

- And sleep whenever we want.

- [Crowd] Yeah!

- And make love
whenever we want.

- [Crowd] Yeah!

(cheering)

- What's he routing for?

- He just won't
come out, Mr. Tower.

(light knocking)

- Mike, I wanna assure
you, the staff understands

and sympathizes.

Your concerns are our concerns.

- Shove your concern.

- Okay, if you'll
unlock the door,

I'm sure we can
reach a compromise.

- Compromise this!

(crowd cheering)

We want food, we want food!

- [Crowd] We want
food, we want food!

We want food, we want food!

We want food, we want food!

We want food!

- Pizzas, where they want it?

- Friendship Grove didn't
authorize that order.

- I did, pay the man.

- It's 47.50 without tip.

- Take a hike, I'm
not paying for it.

- Pay him, Tower, and
I'll open the doors.

- No way!

- We want pizza!

- [Crowd] We want
pizza, we want pizza!

We want pizza, we want pizza!

We want pizza, we want pizza!

(sirens ringing)

- All right, I'll
be back in a minute.

- Frank.

- I can handle it.

- I pay 2,000 a month and
when the going gets rough,

you call the cops.

It's the police state.

Why did you call him?

- Open the door.

(groaning)

- Are you the police?

- No, he's not the
cop, he's a FED.

(laughing)

And the best a guy
could do for a son.

It's about time you came
to visit the old man, huh.

- He has your eyes.

- Yeah, all four of them.

- Pop, you wanna sit down
while I sort this out?

(laughing)

- Francis here likes
to give orders.

- I'm Nelson Tower,
Chief Administrator here

at Friendship Grove.

Can we speak privately?

- I'm not leaving until
somebody pays for these pies.

- How much you say
the pizzas cost?

- 47.50 plus tip.

- I got it, it's
worth every penny.

I'm a little short, son.

(grunting)

- End the riot.

- If you'll sign a
release form in my office,

you can take him with you.

- Release form?

You think you could stay out
of trouble for five minutes

while I take care of this?

You mean to tell me that
this is about pizza?

I mean, I thought
people were pretty much

on their own here.

- A piece of pizza's not
as benign as it appears.

Your father is
clearly able to handle

this kind of a diet, but
not all of our residents

are so lucky.

Their digestive systems are
in a phase of deterioration.

Something as harmless
as a slice of pepperoni

can accelerate that process.

- All right look,
I will talk to him.

I promise there won't
be anymore pizza riots.

- I wish it were so simple.

I've been reading
your father's records

at the other facilities
that he stayed in.

The pattern of
behavior is the same,

only now it's getting worse.

- What do you mean?

- He's harassing the
female population.

- You mean...

Well, a little sexual
activity at his age,

I mean, it's a healthy
thing, isn't it?

- Many of our women are
extremely vulnerable,

recent widows, all
alone in the world,

they crave affection.

Your father is preying on them.

- Do the women complain?

I'm sorry.

- That's not the major problem.

He disappears for
days at a time.

He's free to come and go
as he wants, of course,

but we're still
responsible for him.

And he sets a bad example.

- Oh, that's business as usual.

- Mr. McPike, there is a
nine month waiting list

to get into Friendship Grove.

Your father does not need
the service we provide.

But clearly, he doesn't
want to live alone.

- I'm his only family.

Sometimes I work 24 hours
a day, my job takes me out

of town for weeks at a time.

- The world moves too fast,

there's not enough time,

that's why we have a
nine month waiting list.

In any event, we're not
equipped to handle him.

I'm sorry.

- Some old dude, I'm
gonna miss his wildness.

Life will be easier without him.

- Yeah, easier for who?

- Tonight I gotta pay the
price of those pizza pies.

Juggling bed pans and
(mumbles), gonna get ugly.

- Where is he?

- Saying his goodbyes.

- You take care of yourself.

- Shrewsbury's not
the end of the world,

right around the corner
from the bread bank.

- Huh?

- It's real simple.

Just hop down 35,
you'll find it.

- Find what, Adele?

- My daughter's house,
she's taking me in.

- The one you hate?

- (mumbles) who breeds contempt,

but she's the only one
who can do my hair right.

So, come see me.

- It's the last of his things.

- What am I gonna
do with this weed?

Let's hit the road.

(engine revving)

- Ah, he's sleeping like a baby.

If he can't stand
all those rules,

why doesn't he just live alone?

(laughing)

- Who's he gonna torment?

You know, three years ago,
he sold everything he had

and checked into
an old age home.

Oh, thank god I'm off the hook.

Now I'm in hell.

- He looks pretty
calm right now.

- Yeah, you give
him a few miles.

This isn't nothing new, Vince.

The man has an
authority problem.

He's gone through a few
dozen careers in a lifetime,

railroad man, wildcat
driller, worked on a tugboat,

even had a trucking
company one time,

went up against the union,
almost got our house burnt down.

- Jack of all trades,
master of none, right?

- Oh no, master of all trades.

That's why he won't
listen to anybody.

Big Mike McPike.

Living with big Mike was like
living in a bowling alley.

He'd take issue with anything
just to start an argument.

Belligerent, he's
cantankerous, he's unruly,

he's rude, treats women
like squeeze toys,

meaner than a snake.

Yeah, he's one hell of a guy.

- Hey, you can't just
throw the guy out in

the street, Frank.

(grunting)

I'll tell you what, I'll help
you find a place for him.

- No.

- [Vince] I got the time.

- No, it's my problem,
I'll take care of it.

- Why don't you let him
bunk with you for a while?

You hate living alone, how
much space could he take up?

- My old man fills up a
room pretty damn quick.

Vince, you and I didn't
grow up the same way.

With you, everything's family,
it's hugs, it's kisses,

you go over to mama's
house for sauce on Sundays.

I didn't have that,
I wish I had that,

I wish I had just one
little bit of that.

But I didn't, not even close.

And the reason for that is
asleep there in the backseat.

- [Mike] Where am I?

- You're in my car, pop.

- Who's this guy?

- This is my friend,
Vince, you met him.

- How you doing?

- Like a (mumbles).

- Dad!
(laughing)

- Frances ever arrest you?

- Every chance he gets.

- Don't encourage him.

- Where are we going?

- You're gonna stay
with me for a few days.

- He's staying too?

- No, Vince is not staying.

We're taking him to
the train station.

(groaning)

- It's too bad you (mumbles).

At least he was, he was fun.

This isn't your house.

- You never been
here before, dad.

- Where's the boy, asleep?

Jenny?

Wake them up, I'd
like to see everybody!

- Jenny and I are
not together anymore.

- What the hell does that mean?

- That means we're separated.

It's a long involved
story and frankly,

it's none of your business.

- [Mike] What'd you
do, run her off?

- I don't wanna go into it, Pop.

- How long has it been?

- OH, 15 months, two weeks,
give or take a couple days.

Not that it bothers me.

- How come this is the first
time I'm hearing about it?

- It's my family,
I'll take care of it.

- How's the boy?

- Drake's a good kid, he
rolls with the punches

the best he can.

- That's nothing to be proud of.

- You know, not everybody
rolls along their life

like you do, pop, some
people aren't afraid

to stop and face the music.

- I've never been afraid
of anything in my life.

- No, god forbid.

No, no thanks.

Listen, we have a
big day tomorrow.

What do you say I
show you your room?

- How could you let
a great girl like

that get away from you?

I knew this was gonna happen!

It's a damn full of yourself
with that job of yours.

What are you doing, god's work?

- You know, just this one time,

let's accept the fact
that you don't know

what the hell you're talking
about, and let it go at that.

It's too late for
this conversation in
more ways than one.

- Jenny was the cutest
thing you ever brought home.

She loved you to pieces.

Not that I ever
could figure out why!

- All right, you
can take the bed.

The hangers are in the closet.

- I wanna know what happened.

- Why dad, so you can make
some more absurd accusations?

- So, I can do something to
help get her back for you.

- That's not possible, dad,
even for the invincible.

- 43 years old and I'm
still fixing your messes.

- 44.

- That girl knew how
to have a good time

and you broke her spirit.

- The bedroom gets
cold at night.

- I don't want your bedroom,
the floor's good enough for me.

- Yeah, well, not for your back.

- My back's the strongest
thing in this house.

- Uh.

Yeah, pop.

You got the back,
I got the spine.

- You could've learned a
thing or two from that girl.

- Life is not all fun and games.

- No, and it's no damn
master thesis either.

You complicate everything!

- Leave me alone.

- She knew how to let her
hair down and enjoy life,

and you ran her off!

- She is an alcoholic,
you stupid bastard!

The woman almost died!

(slow solemn music)

- Damn it, I'm your
father, I could've helped.

- What, dad?

What could you have
done that I didn't try?

She was sick.

- Not Jenny.

- Yeah, Jenny, sweet,
adorable Jenny.

She crawled into a bottle
and she wouldn't come out

for anyone, not for
me, not for her son,

and for damn sure
not mile a minute

indestructible Mike McPike.

Let me tell you something,
the only thing that saved her

was a liver transplant and
I had to beg her to have it.

She wanted to die,
dad, she welcomed it.

And when she got back on her
feet again, she turned me out.

She had a new liver, a new life,

and too much resentment for me.

I put my job, I put everything
I believed in on the line

to save her and
she turned me out.

And it eats at me,
dad, it eats at me.

It eats at me every
minute of everyday.

But there you are.

(soft slow music)

(sizzling)

- Burn you some?

- No.

- What, are you worried
about your arteries?

- I just want cereal.

- I think you're worried
about your arteries.

I've been eating the same
breakfast for 70 odd years

and I'm as healthy as a horse.

- Yes, dad.

- [Mike] You're out of beer.

- Yup.

- That looks real tasty if
you're a damn barn animal.

(grunting)

- Look pop, we're gonna be
living together for a while.

- I wanna be out of
here as soon as I can.

- Yeah right, well
right now you're here.

What do you say we
start over again?

I'm sorry about last night.

- What are you doing about
getting back with Jenny?

- That case is closed, I don't
wanna talk about it anymore.

Besides, we're talking
about your life.

What do you wanna do?

- I thought we drive
down to Atlantic City

and take in a couple of
casinos and see a show.

Maybe Vinny would
like to tag along?

- No, no, I'm going to
take a couple days off work

so I can get you relocated.

We don't have the time,
we have to move fast.

- Oh, crime would be running
rampant in the eastern seaboard

because I need a home.

- I made a list of homes that
we can call after breakfast.

- You know what's wrong with
you, you're a control freak,

that's why you're a cop.

You like to tell
people how to live.

That's why your wife
booted your ass.

- We're talking about
finding you a place to live.

- I'll find my own
damn place to live.

What I wanna know is
when you're going to get

back with your wife and son.

- I'll handle my
own problems, pop.

- I can handle my own problems.

When you gonna dump that
holier than thou malarkey?

That sanctimonious
attitude is what's got you

living alone here,
in Shrewsbury.

- What are you, an expert?

Why should I listen
to anything you say?

Your track record with
relationships flat out sucks!

- Could be.

But I'm not leaving
this house until you

get your life straightened out.

(soft jazzy music)

(knocking)

- It's about time.

- Hi, Frank.

- Vince.

- What's the matter with you,
Frank, you look like a wreck?

- I am a wreck.

Now listen, stay in the house,

don't let him out of your sight.

- Okay.

What'd Jenny say?

- The Wonder Woman can
spare me a moment of

her precious time if I come now.

- No problem.

- Vince, don't let him
know you're watching him.

- Frank, Frank, that's
what I do, remember?

- I'm ready when you...

Oh, hey, all right, now we're
the Three Musketeers again.

- I'll be back in
a little while.

- I thought we were going out.

- We will, pop,
we'll go out later.

- I'll see you later, Frank.

- Yeah.

- How you been, Mike?

What is this for?

- That's what they pay
babysitters now a days.

You're relieved of your duty.

- What you talking
about babysitting,

I'm here to watch
a football game.

- Yeah, where did you come
from, where do you live?

- Brooklyn.

- You don't have
TV's in Brooklyn?

You're really gonna
waste the afternoon

watching the boob tube?

- Hey, it's gonna
be a great game.

- So we oughta
watch it in a bar.

- Frank wants us to wait here.

- You Frank's yes man?

- Look, it will be great,
we'll watch the game,

we'll get some Chinese
food at half time.

- Gee, let's live it up.

(knocking)

- Yes, may I help you?

- Who are you?

- I'm Wade, I work here.

- Doing what?

- I specialize in the
preparation of Japanese

and American Indian cuisine.

Can I ask who you are?

- Oh yeah, sure.

(grinding)

Hi, Jenny!

- Hi, Frank, what do you
wanna talk to me about?

- You think we
could talk outside?

- I can't leave
this little congeal.

- I need to talk to you alone.

- All right, just
let me finish this.

Wait for me outside,
you're in the way.

(grinding)

- You call that hitting?

They play they got hernias.

- What are you talking about,

they're still scraping
a guy off the turf.

- It's nothing compared
to the players in my day.

Sam Huff, Ray Nitschke.

They played like
murderers out on parole.

- They wouldn't even
make the first cut today.

- Well, your generation's
a bunch of prima donnas.

- The athletes today are
scientifically trained,

there's no comparison,
they're bigger,

they're stronger,
they're faster.

- No comparison is right.

Today they get multimillion
dollar contracts

and go on the disable
list every time they

sprain a little pinky.

They should be
wearing miniskirts.

- Well, it's almost halftime,
I'll order our lunch.

- Ah, you see, that's what's
wrong with today's youth.

They want everything
handed to them.

Get all the stimulation
they need transmitted

into their homes instead of
living a life of their own.

Look at this, two
healthy men sitting here,

watching other men doing.

- We are not going out.

GO ahead, have another beer.

- I got you by what, 40 years?

- [Vince] I'll order lunch now.

- I'm still (mumbles)
than you are.

- All right, Mike,
whatever you say.

- I can prove it.

- Forget it.

- What about a, a little
test of strength, huh?

- What the hell are you doing?

- All you gotta do is
pull my head off the floor

far enough to make
the quarter slide off.

- What, are you kidding me?

- I got 50 bucks
says you can't do it.

- Mike, I don't want your money.

- If you win, we
watch the second half.

I win, you take me to lunch.

- [Vince] Where?

- Someplace close.

- Just out to lunch, right?

- One hours tops,
we'll be back before

Francis knows a thing.

I gotta get out of this place.

- All right, fine, fine.

(groaning)

All right, this time for sure.

- It could use another coat
of weatherproof in here.

- Yeah, it's on
Drake's list of chores.

- Good.

It was a big help
when we built it.

So, I see you've finally
found what the room

with the oven is for, huh?

- Not that there was
ever anyone to cook for.

You know, I realize
that the alcohol was

really blinding my senses.

I haven't had this
much energy in years.

Business is great and
everything's falling into place.

- Well, that's just peachy.

- Yeah, it is, and I'd
like to keep it that way.

- All right.

You just (mumbles) to give
me a moment of your time,

I'll tell you what
I have to say and

then you can get
right back to it.

Now, Big Mike is
staying with me until

I can find him a new home.

- And?

- And I'm getting to it.

And he's got it in his
mind that my life is

messed up because
we're separated.

He's not gonna leave until
we're back together again.

So I thought that if it
appeared a reconciliation

were taking place--

- Frank!

- You know what, I would rather
crawl across broken glass

than ask you for anything.

But anything short of bloodshed,

I don't know how to get
him out of my house!

- I can't lie like that.

Half of my life was
a charade, Frank.

I speak from experience,
delusions don't help anyone.

- Let me tell you
something, it his delusion,

it is not my delusion.

He thinks he can help us,
his whole life he's diluted

himself into thinking
he has the Midas touch,

that he can swoop down
like the conquering hero

and make everything
all right again.

He can't fix us,
Jenny, you know it,

and believe me, I know it.

The problem is he doesn't!

- Jen!

- Will you let me
tell you something,

you are in my kitchen,
I paid for that kitchen!

- Cream or half and
half for the base?

- Half and Half is
great, it's great.

I gotta go.

- Jenny!

Please.

Here's one dinner, I am not
asking you for the world.

- One dinner.

(playful music)

- Hey, cutie.

- Mike, why don't we
order some lunch, huh?

- Huh?

Yeah, sure, what about
a pitcher of beer.

(lighthearted music)

- I thought you were broke.

- Emergency reserve.

- Why don't you
ease up on the cash?

- I believe in
supporting the odds.

- How about dancing some
of that over this way.

- Amateur night's
Thursday, cowboy.

- She knows a good
time when she sees it.

- Why don't you take
the old man back

to the nursing home?

- Hey, why don't you
watch your mouth.

- You keep talking like that and

you won't make it
to the golden ears.

- He's not afraid
of you, candy asses.

- Take your best shot!

- Let's just calm down, okay.

Mike, let's get the
hell out of here, huh.

Come on, it's not worth it.

- No kid, you're
right, it's not.

It's all we got.

(people talking)

(glass clanking)

- Vince!

- Thanks a lot, Frank.

- He got you with the
quarter trick, didn't he?

Dad, Drake, dinner's ready.

- Hey, this looks
wonderful, kid, as always.

I'm hungry as a bear.

(laughing)

- Well, there's plenty,
Mike, so don't be shy.

- I love home cooked food.

- See you soon, grandpa.

- You can count on it, Pal.

- Wait a second,
where are you going?

- I'm going to the
rink with the guys.

- No, you're not sport
shoes, you come over here

and sit down and eat dinner
with your grandfather.

- Hey, come on, let him go.

A bunch of old folks
sitting around talking,

what kind of fun
is that for a kid?

- Dad.

- Uh.

- Let him go.

Let him see his old pals.

- Just be home early.

- I will.

- [Mike] I hope this
wasn't a lot of work.

- No trouble at all.

- She's one in a million, Frank.

- One in a million, dad,
I've always said that.

- So.

When you two gonna get
back together, huh?

- Well, Mike, we have a lot
of things to work through,

we're just taking it
one step at a time.

- Yeah, that's the way to do it.

- As long as there's progress.

- There's progress.

- [Mike] Well, when you
gonna start moving back in?

- Soon.

- [Mike] How soon?

- Soon, it's hard to put a
date on a thing like that, dad.

Peas?

- Month or two months?

- Mike--

- Don't say it, kids, I know
lip service when I hear it.

This dinner's a sham.

Not that I don't
appreciate a good meal.

- Hey, don't blame
her, it was my idea.

- I figured that.

- Yeah, it was a
scam, dad, but see,

we did it for you.

You know, you drop in my
lap out of one of your

disappearing acts and
you expect everything

to be just the way
you remembered it.

- I'm a kid, you
have to lie to me?

- No, you see the world
goes on, things change.

Some things get better,
some things get worse.

Jenny, we got worse.

We don't need your
prodding, your coaching,

or holding me
hostage in my house.

- Frank.

- No, don't Frank me.

You know, I'm really tired
of taking it on the chin

and for trying to
do what's right.

- What's right according to you.

- I am not the sole creator
of crap in this house.

For 19 years you leaned on
me, and I let you do it,

because everything you
did led me to believe

that's what you wanted.

- I don't think
this is the time.

- It is the time!

The only time we talk
is when I drop Drake off

or pick him up.

- I agreed to have dinner,
not cater your epiphany.

- New concepts catering.

The only new concept here
is that you're sober.

- Hey!

- I don't need this,
my life works now!

- You just traded one
compulsion for another.

- Quit jumping on her!

- You stay out of this!

- I'm still your father.

- You were a booming
voice that came and went

with the prevailing wind.

- You and your mother
always had food on the table

and clothes on your back.

- So, paying the
light bill fulfills

your responsibilities, pop?

- [Mike] You turned
out all right.

- No, no, I'm not.

You look at me, I'm a
mess, I'm 44 years old,

my wife doesn't have time,
my son doesn't respect me,

and I just have an annoying
acquaintance with my father.

- You should thank
your lucky stars.

I didn't want you
to turn out like me,

bouncing around,
jumping from job to job.

- You save the confession,
after 40 years,

I don't give a damn.

- Well, you better
give a damn, boy.

You're not a quitter,
you never were!

You two still have time.

- I don't want time, I didn't
quit my marriage, Jenny,

and I'm tired of groveling
trying to save it.

I admit defeat.

- All right, all
right, it's my fault.

I am the one who walked,
I'm the reason you guys

are yelling at each other.

Now, can we eat this please?

- He must've done
something wrong to lose

a good woman like you.

- You were a good
provider, Frank,

and you are a good father.

I don't wanna ever
hear you say that about

Drake again, he worships
the ground you walk on.

The breakdown was
between you and me!

Drake is an innocent who
is not siding with anyone.

- Where are you going?

- This talk's going nowhere,
I'm not going with it.

- Dad!

- I'll be out in the
car when you're done.

- Oh, go on, pop,
quitting again.

- I'm not quitting,
I'm defeated.

You guys are hopeless.

- Frank, Drake loves you.

You guys have a lot
of years to work out

what's wrong between you.

And it's not too late for
you and your father either.

- No.

On that one, I do admit defeat.

(slow sad music)

(alarm ringing)

(coughing)

Dad.

Dad!

I wanna get going
before traffic gets bad.

All right, let's go.

Rise and shine.

Dad!

(slow intriguing music)

Dad!

Jenny, it's Frank,
have you seen dad?

- No, what's wrong?

- I don't know, he must've
gone out early this morning.

- Well, he hasn't shown up here.

- All right, if you hear
from him, give me a call.

- I will, you too.

- Thank you.

(slow solemn music)

Pop.
(groaning)

Another disappearing act.

(phone ringing)

Hello.

Hello?

- It's bad luck I remember
him mentioning your name

and where you lived.

- I'm sorry for the
inconvenience, Ms. Tildshaw.

- I just hope your
father's all right.

He rang the doorbell,
when I answered the door,

he didn't recognize me at all.

Wouldn't even come in the house.

I didn't wake him up, I thought
as long as he's sleeping.

- I appreciate the phone call.

Pop.

Pop.

- What the hell you doing here?

- Give me your hand.

Come on, come on.

Watch your coat.

- Thanks.

- How long's this been going on?

- You're making too much of it.

- You end up 40 miles away,
don't know how you got there

and I'm making too
much out of it.

How long, dad?

- Mmm, off and on
for a while now.

You happy?

- What happens, do you get
confused, do you black out?

- Uh, I just, I just
start out in one direction

and end up in the other.

I never stopped to examine it.

- Maybe you should.

- Why, I know what it
is, I'm getting old.

- Well, maybe it's
not that simple.

Maybe there's
something you could do,

you could see a specialist.

- I don't need a doctor
to tell me what it is,

I know what it is.

It's the beginning of the end,

and the end is where
we're all headed.

I'm all right.

- Maybe you should stay
with me for a while.

(laughing)

- We'll end up
killing each other.

- Yeah, we probably would.

I don't want anything
to happen to you.

You're my dad.

- I, I think we should
find me a place.

Don't you, Frank?

I can be a hell
of a lot of work.

- We could get
somebody to come in.

- Frank, it's better this way.

You've got your
life, such as it is,

I've got mine.

I operate better in
my own environment

with a ratio of ladies
is more in my favor.

Don't smile, Frank, I
hate it when you do that.

Look at this place, how
do you expect me to live

in a dump like this?

- Quietly, I hope.

Dad, that should
just about do it.

- The closet's too small.

- The place shows promise.

- It's a hell hole like
the rest of the traps.

Like throwing money away.

- Well, at least
you won't be living

halfway across the state.

- Not that I've
ever been invited.

- Dad, you are invited anytime
you would like to come.

Just give me a little warning.

- Mr. McPike?

- Yes?

- Yes?

I believe she's
referring to me, Francis.

- You must be the new neighbor.

I'm Georgia, I'm right nextdoor.

- Yeah, Michael McPike.

If you're an example of
the scenery around here,

I've obviously made
a very good decision.

- Stop by sometime.

- I hate it when they
throw themselves at me.

- Yes, sir.

Well dad.

(slow peaceful music)

- Francis.

- You take care of yourself.

- Yeah.

You save it, Francis,
I'm not dying.

(slow sad music)

You get out of here before
you give me indigestion.

- I just wanted to call and
thank you for your help.

- [Jenny] It's okay, Frank.

How's he doing?

- Well, he's settled, as
much as that's possible.

- Does he like his new home?

- Oh, you know, too many rules,

food's lousy, not enough women.

He's in his element.

(laughing)

- Oh, I'm glad it worked out,

must be nice to have
things back to normal, huh?

- Yeah.

And thank you for dinner.

I'll talk to you soon.

- Okay.

- What $134?

- [Woman] Hi, sailor,
I'm glad you called.

We're gonna have fun.

I'm naked, are you?

(light playful music)

(exciting dramatic music)

(inspirational music)