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1
00:00:03,533 --> 00:00:05,833
(male narrator)
Previously, on a
very special Clone High...
2
00:00:05,833 --> 00:00:07,833
Joan made a pass at Abe,
3
00:00:07,833 --> 00:00:09,900
Cleo made a pass at Joan,
4
00:00:09,900 --> 00:00:11,567
and Abe scored,
5
00:00:11,567 --> 00:00:14,133
but not on the court.
6
00:00:14,133 --> 00:00:16,833
I find sports metaphors
very useful
7
00:00:16,833 --> 00:00:19,400
for making
veiled sexual references.
8
00:00:19,400 --> 00:00:22,300
(Abandoned Pools singing)
* Way, way back in the 1980s
9
00:00:22,300 --> 00:00:25,233
* Secret government employees
10
00:00:25,233 --> 00:00:28,133
* Dug up famous
guys and ladies *
11
00:00:28,133 --> 00:00:31,167
* And made amusing
genetic copies *
12
00:00:31,167 --> 00:00:33,967
* Now the clones
are sexy teens now *
13
00:00:33,967 --> 00:00:36,800
* They're going to make it
if they try *
14
00:00:36,800 --> 00:00:39,800
* Loving, learning,
sharing, judging *
15
00:00:39,800 --> 00:00:46,033
* Time to laugh
and shiver and cry *
16
00:00:46,033 --> 00:00:48,767
* Clone High
17
00:00:48,767 --> 00:00:54,400
* Clone High
18
00:00:56,267 --> 00:00:59,833
Abe, not here.
19
00:00:59,833 --> 00:01:03,400
The first kiss sets the tone
for the whole relationship.
20
00:01:03,400 --> 00:01:05,067
It has to be perfect.
21
00:01:05,067 --> 00:01:08,100
Gosh, Cleo, what else can I do
to make this perfect?
22
00:01:08,100 --> 00:01:11,700
I'm wearing eight magazines'
worth of Drakkar Noir.
23
00:01:11,700 --> 00:01:14,667
Well, I mean, I hate to bring up
my first kiss with JFK.
24
00:01:14,667 --> 00:01:15,667
Please don't.
25
00:01:15,667 --> 00:01:17,267
We were in the back of his van,
26
00:01:17,267 --> 00:01:20,067
parked behind the Laundromat,
empty wine coolers
27
00:01:20,067 --> 00:01:22,467
jabbing into our writhing
naked bodies.
28
00:01:22,467 --> 00:01:23,867
Naked bodies?
29
00:01:23,867 --> 00:01:26,400
Look, Abe, I'm the clone
of Cleopatra,
30
00:01:26,400 --> 00:01:28,333
the most glamorous woman
in history.
31
00:01:28,333 --> 00:01:30,133
I need our first kiss
to be passionate,
32
00:01:30,133 --> 00:01:32,133
dramatic, unexpected,
and ideally,
33
00:01:32,133 --> 00:01:33,600
accompanied by fireworks.
34
00:01:33,600 --> 00:01:35,200
[fireworks popping and hissing]
35
00:01:35,200 --> 00:01:37,167
You know what I'm
in the mood for right now?
36
00:01:38,300 --> 00:01:39,700
A salad.
37
00:01:41,367 --> 00:01:43,067
(Joan)
What do you mean,
you haven't kissed her yet?
38
00:01:43,067 --> 00:01:44,700
What about that night
at JFK's party
39
00:01:44,700 --> 00:01:46,667
when everyone was drinking
non-alcoholic beer?
40
00:01:46,667 --> 00:01:49,800
What a hilarious night.
41
00:01:49,800 --> 00:01:51,833
This is our first kiss
as boyfriend and girlfriend,
42
00:01:51,833 --> 00:01:53,167
and Cleo needs it to be perfect.
43
00:01:53,167 --> 00:01:55,333
But JFK used to just
park his van--
44
00:01:55,333 --> 00:01:56,633
Yeah, yeah.
I heard.
45
00:01:56,633 --> 00:01:58,633
Yeah, so did everyone
in fifth period English.
46
00:01:58,633 --> 00:01:59,700
She's a screamer, Abe.
47
00:01:59,700 --> 00:02:01,167
Enough!
48
00:02:01,167 --> 00:02:04,167
Man, you wanted a kiss,
but instead you got bubkes.
49
00:02:04,167 --> 00:02:05,167
[gasps]
50
00:02:05,167 --> 00:02:06,767
Kiss, bubkes.
51
00:02:06,767 --> 00:02:08,200
I just totally rhymed.
52
00:02:08,200 --> 00:02:09,633
I rhymed!
53
00:02:09,633 --> 00:02:11,067
Wait,
rhymed, rhymed.
54
00:02:11,067 --> 00:02:12,067
[gasps]
55
00:02:12,067 --> 00:02:13,367
I did it again!
56
00:02:13,367 --> 00:02:15,333
What's so great
about accidentally rhyming?
57
00:02:15,333 --> 00:02:18,100
There are no accidents
in rhyming, dog.
58
00:02:18,100 --> 00:02:19,767
You see, rhyming's
a godlike force
59
00:02:19,767 --> 00:02:22,200
that chooses people for stardom.
60
00:02:22,200 --> 00:02:25,333
It happened to Bubba Sparxxx,
and now it is happening to me.
61
00:02:25,333 --> 00:02:29,233
You kind of just rhymed
kiss with kiss, Gandhi.
62
00:02:29,233 --> 00:02:32,933
Please, call me G-Spot.
63
00:02:32,933 --> 00:02:33,933
Whatever.
64
00:02:33,933 --> 00:02:35,467
Abe, forget Cleo.
65
00:02:35,467 --> 00:02:37,333
I mean, if two people
are in love,
66
00:02:37,333 --> 00:02:42,133
the first kiss will just happen
at the right moment...
67
00:02:42,133 --> 00:02:44,100
like this.
68
00:02:45,167 --> 00:02:47,067
[laughing]
69
00:02:47,067 --> 00:02:48,300
Thanks, Joan.
70
00:02:48,300 --> 00:02:52,367
Your fake infatuation bit
never fails to amuse.
71
00:02:52,367 --> 00:02:54,833
You should join
an improv troupe.
72
00:02:54,833 --> 00:02:57,900
(Principal Scudworth)
Once I implant
these brain-wave transmitters
73
00:02:57,900 --> 00:03:00,933
into the clones' brains,
I will be able
74
00:03:00,933 --> 00:03:05,300
to see and hear everything
they taste and smell.
75
00:03:05,300 --> 00:03:07,767
We'll start with the As.
76
00:03:07,767 --> 00:03:10,533
I've got John Adams.
77
00:03:10,533 --> 00:03:13,100
John Quincy Adams.
78
00:03:13,100 --> 00:03:14,533
Sam Adams.
79
00:03:14,533 --> 00:03:15,567
Abigail--
80
00:03:15,567 --> 00:03:18,300
Damn, there's a lot of Adams!
81
00:03:18,300 --> 00:03:22,433
Now, you know how I like
to perform evil surgery.
82
00:03:22,433 --> 00:03:25,267
Everything
has to be just so.
83
00:03:25,267 --> 00:03:26,733
[saw buzzing]
84
00:03:26,733 --> 00:03:29,233
*
85
00:03:29,233 --> 00:03:32,133
Why, that sounds like
the pizzicato tiptoeing
86
00:03:32,133 --> 00:03:34,333
of a pesky skunk.
87
00:03:34,333 --> 00:03:36,733
Unacceptable!
88
00:03:36,733 --> 00:03:40,100
[chattering]
89
00:03:40,100 --> 00:03:42,067
This isn't a skunk.
90
00:03:42,067 --> 00:03:44,633
Some kind of hissing
novelty candle
91
00:03:44,633 --> 00:03:47,400
for a giant birthday cake.
92
00:03:47,400 --> 00:03:50,167
[loud booming]
93
00:03:50,167 --> 00:03:53,167
Try and catch me, bitch.
94
00:03:53,167 --> 00:03:56,100
[screaming]
95
00:03:58,833 --> 00:04:00,067
Oh, my God!
96
00:04:00,067 --> 00:04:03,067
[lively music]
97
00:04:03,067 --> 00:04:05,733
*
98
00:04:05,733 --> 00:04:08,567
(Cleopatra)
After we have
our perfect first kiss,
99
00:04:08,567 --> 00:04:10,200
I'm gonna
do things to you
100
00:04:10,200 --> 00:04:11,667
that would shock
the college boy
101
00:04:11,667 --> 00:04:13,200
I hooked up with
at cheerleading camp.
102
00:04:13,200 --> 00:04:14,333
Wait, what college boy?
103
00:04:14,333 --> 00:04:17,067
Shh, don't talk.
104
00:04:17,067 --> 00:04:19,467
This moment feels perfect.
105
00:04:19,467 --> 00:04:22,133
Kissably perfect.
106
00:04:22,133 --> 00:04:23,133
Dinger!
107
00:04:23,133 --> 00:04:24,400
[slurring]
Hey, hot lips.
108
00:04:24,400 --> 00:04:27,267
This letter got mixed up
in my disability checks.
109
00:04:27,267 --> 00:04:31,500
You know, I used to be pretty
when I was in school.
110
00:04:31,500 --> 00:04:33,467
Now look at me!
111
00:04:33,467 --> 00:04:35,200
[gasping]
Oh, my God.
112
00:04:35,200 --> 00:04:36,833
I applied to be a dancer
113
00:04:36,833 --> 00:04:40,567
on Ashley Angel from O-Town's
Spring Break Dance Academy.
114
00:04:40,567 --> 00:04:43,867
The Ashley Angel from O-Town?
115
00:04:43,867 --> 00:04:47,833
From TV's gift to pop music
and the world, O-Town?
116
00:04:47,833 --> 00:04:51,433
Wow, he's like the Beatles
and Jesus rolled into one.
117
00:04:51,433 --> 00:04:52,867
If I get in,
it'll look so great
118
00:04:52,867 --> 00:04:54,500
on my college application.
119
00:04:54,500 --> 00:04:56,567
Come on, that show
is just a porn substitute
120
00:04:56,567 --> 00:04:58,667
with questionable
academic value.
121
00:04:58,667 --> 00:05:00,500
No, no.
122
00:05:00,500 --> 00:05:03,733
Since Ashley Angel from O-Town
became dean of admissions,
123
00:05:03,733 --> 00:05:05,933
he's turned it into
a prestigious dance academy
124
00:05:05,933 --> 00:05:08,233
that just happens to have
the cameras running.
125
00:05:09,400 --> 00:05:10,667
[screams]
126
00:05:10,667 --> 00:05:12,300
Oh, I can't believe it!
I'm in!
127
00:05:12,300 --> 00:05:15,100
I'm going to study under
Ashley Angel from O-Town.
128
00:05:15,100 --> 00:05:19,267
But they tape that show far away
on the sunny beaches of Canada.
129
00:05:19,267 --> 00:05:21,300
What about us?
130
00:05:21,300 --> 00:05:22,367
[screams]
131
00:05:22,367 --> 00:05:24,733
Ashley Angel
from O-Town!
132
00:05:24,733 --> 00:05:26,467
Oh! Oh, it's so cold.
133
00:05:26,467 --> 00:05:27,467
Oh, it's so cold.
134
00:05:27,467 --> 00:05:28,900
I like it.
135
00:05:28,900 --> 00:05:33,200
Ashley Angel from O-Town, eh?
136
00:05:33,200 --> 00:05:37,867
* For purple
mountains' majesty *
137
00:05:37,867 --> 00:05:42,400
* Above the fruited plain
138
00:05:42,400 --> 00:05:44,767
[laughing]
139
00:05:44,767 --> 00:05:46,233
Fruited plain!
140
00:05:46,233 --> 00:05:47,633
Fruit!
141
00:05:47,633 --> 00:05:49,467
It has two meanings!
142
00:05:49,467 --> 00:05:52,400
[laughing]
143
00:05:55,067 --> 00:05:56,267
[coughing]
144
00:05:56,267 --> 00:05:57,967
JFK, man,
you got to help me.
145
00:05:57,967 --> 00:05:58,967
Oh, God!
146
00:05:58,967 --> 00:06:00,200
You're the only dude I know
147
00:06:00,200 --> 00:06:02,267
who has a recording studio
in his crib.
148
00:06:02,267 --> 00:06:04,200
What are you talking
about, bald nerd?
149
00:06:04,200 --> 00:06:07,067
I got to lay down a rap demo
for Ashley Angel from O-Town.
150
00:06:07,067 --> 00:06:08,367
Who?
151
00:06:08,367 --> 00:06:09,900
He's that teen idol
from that boy band.
152
00:06:09,900 --> 00:06:10,967
- 'NSYNC?
- No.
153
00:06:10,967 --> 00:06:12,067
- Backstreet Boys?
- No.
154
00:06:12,067 --> 00:06:13,467
- 98 Degrees?
- No.
155
00:06:13,467 --> 00:06:15,067
- Menudo?
- No.
156
00:06:15,067 --> 00:06:16,500
He's in the band O-Town.
157
00:06:16,500 --> 00:06:18,067
Oh, you mean
the superstar
158
00:06:18,067 --> 00:06:20,400
who hosts the spring break
dance academy?
159
00:06:20,400 --> 00:06:21,967
His connections
to the music industry
160
00:06:21,967 --> 00:06:23,933
will help me fulfill
my weeklong dream
161
00:06:23,933 --> 00:06:26,200
of becoming an international
rap sensation.
162
00:06:26,200 --> 00:06:27,767
No can do!
163
00:06:27,767 --> 00:06:30,600
I'm recording my annual
Fourth of July album
164
00:06:30,600 --> 00:06:33,067
and laughing at gay lyrics.
165
00:06:33,067 --> 00:06:34,267
Check this out!
166
00:06:34,267 --> 00:06:39,267
G-Spot rocks the G-spot!
G-Spot rocks the G-spot.
167
00:06:39,267 --> 00:06:41,633
Wow, that rhymed.
168
00:06:41,633 --> 00:06:45,167
Say hello to the next
Bubba Sparxxx!
169
00:06:46,633 --> 00:06:48,067
(woman)
This is the final
boarding announcement
170
00:06:48,067 --> 00:06:49,700
for flight 100 to Canada City.
171
00:06:49,700 --> 00:06:55,200
Cleo!
172
00:06:55,200 --> 00:06:56,867
[gasps]
173
00:06:56,867 --> 00:06:59,533
Don't get on that plane.
174
00:06:59,533 --> 00:07:01,800
Abe, what are you doing here?
175
00:07:01,800 --> 00:07:06,167
Stopping you from making
the biggest mistake of my life.
176
00:07:06,167 --> 00:07:09,233
Abe, if you
ask me to stay,
177
00:07:09,233 --> 00:07:12,467
you'll be stomping out
the fire of my dreams.
178
00:07:12,467 --> 00:07:16,567
The only fire I care about
is the flame of our love.
179
00:07:16,567 --> 00:07:18,100
And I couldn't live
if you passed
180
00:07:18,100 --> 00:07:20,400
that burning sensation
to another guy.
181
00:07:20,400 --> 00:07:22,267
Look, Abe, I'd like
nothing more
182
00:07:22,267 --> 00:07:24,867
than to let you feel me up
like you were my dentist,
183
00:07:24,867 --> 00:07:27,100
but I care too much
about our future together.
184
00:07:27,100 --> 00:07:28,367
Back up.
What dentist?
185
00:07:28,367 --> 00:07:29,733
Dr. Tucker?
186
00:07:29,733 --> 00:07:35,067
All that matters is you,
is us, is now.
187
00:07:35,067 --> 00:07:38,067
[both breathing shakily]
188
00:07:39,400 --> 00:07:40,833
All aboard!
189
00:07:40,833 --> 00:07:42,933
All aboard for Canada City!
190
00:07:44,900 --> 00:07:47,267
Can you at least take
the jacket I gave you?
191
00:07:47,267 --> 00:07:49,100
Oh, Abe, I'll
wear it on TV.
192
00:07:49,100 --> 00:07:50,567
I promise.
193
00:07:50,567 --> 00:07:53,067
It'll be our secret message.
194
00:07:53,067 --> 00:07:55,467
Part of you is inside of me.
195
00:07:57,167 --> 00:08:02,667
Cleo!
196
00:08:03,767 --> 00:08:05,800
Don't get on that plane...
197
00:08:05,800 --> 00:08:07,067
yet!
198
00:08:07,067 --> 00:08:08,533
First, take this demo
199
00:08:08,533 --> 00:08:10,467
to give to Ashley Angel
from O-Town.
200
00:08:10,467 --> 00:08:12,933
Ew! Get away from me.
201
00:08:14,767 --> 00:08:16,233
Now get on that plane!
202
00:08:16,233 --> 00:08:19,100
Bu--oh.
203
00:08:19,100 --> 00:08:21,867
Hey, man, thanks
for stalling her.
204
00:08:23,533 --> 00:08:26,200
Can I borrow ten bucks
for an airport cookie?
205
00:08:30,267 --> 00:08:31,500
*
206
00:08:31,500 --> 00:08:34,067
Man, I can't believe
the only way
207
00:08:34,067 --> 00:08:36,400
I can see my girlfriend
is on TV.
208
00:08:36,400 --> 00:08:38,767
[sighs]
I know how you feel, man.
209
00:08:38,767 --> 00:08:42,233
*
210
00:08:42,233 --> 00:08:44,300
Abe, be realistic.
211
00:08:44,300 --> 00:08:45,867
I'll bet Cleo's
already hooked up
212
00:08:45,867 --> 00:08:47,433
with Ashley Angel
from O-Town.
213
00:08:47,433 --> 00:08:48,600
Wrong-o!
214
00:08:48,600 --> 00:08:50,867
We made a deal
to remain faithful.
215
00:08:50,867 --> 00:08:53,433
No touching
below the eyebrows.
216
00:08:53,433 --> 00:08:54,700
[laughs]
217
00:08:54,700 --> 00:08:58,067
Abe, all celebrities
are completely hairless.
218
00:08:58,067 --> 00:08:59,567
They put the eyebrows on
in editing
219
00:08:59,567 --> 00:09:02,767
to make sure the actors make
the right facial expressions.
220
00:09:02,767 --> 00:09:05,667
We'll see who's laughing
when Cleo's wearing
221
00:09:05,667 --> 00:09:09,900
my letterman's jacket
on a cable TV show,
222
00:09:09,900 --> 00:09:12,267
which, coincidentally,
is starting right now.
223
00:09:12,267 --> 00:09:13,833
*
224
00:09:13,833 --> 00:09:15,300
(Ashley)
What's up?
225
00:09:15,300 --> 00:09:18,400
Welcome to sunny Canada,
where it's always spring break.
226
00:09:18,400 --> 00:09:20,300
It is I,
Ashley Angel from O-Town,
227
00:09:20,300 --> 00:09:22,233
and I command you to do dance.
228
00:09:22,233 --> 00:09:25,233
[girls grunting and panting]
229
00:09:25,233 --> 00:09:28,700
I can't believe my eyes.
230
00:09:28,700 --> 00:09:31,300
She's not wearing my jacket!
231
00:09:31,300 --> 00:09:35,833
*
232
00:09:35,833 --> 00:09:37,100
Hey, mate, would it be cool
233
00:09:37,100 --> 00:09:39,533
if I played this random demo
on live TV?
234
00:09:39,533 --> 00:09:42,167
Sure, teen dance shows
are all about taking chances
235
00:09:42,167 --> 00:09:43,633
on undiscovered
young artists.
236
00:09:43,633 --> 00:09:45,067
[whirring]
237
00:09:45,067 --> 00:09:47,633
[funky music]
238
00:09:47,633 --> 00:09:49,533
(Ghandi)
Aww...
239
00:09:49,533 --> 00:09:51,133
Oh, yeah.
240
00:09:51,133 --> 00:09:52,900
*
241
00:09:52,900 --> 00:09:53,933
Uh-huh.
Uh-huh.
242
00:09:53,933 --> 00:09:56,467
*
243
00:09:56,467 --> 00:09:58,967
* G-Spot rocks the G-spot
244
00:09:58,967 --> 00:10:01,633
* G-Spot
rocks the G-spot *
245
00:10:01,633 --> 00:10:03,133
* What's my name? *
246
00:10:03,133 --> 00:10:04,167
(all)
G-Spot!
247
00:10:04,167 --> 00:10:05,700
(Gandhi)
* What do I rock?
248
00:10:05,700 --> 00:10:06,867
(all)
The G-spot!
249
00:10:06,867 --> 00:10:08,333
(Ghandi)
* G-Spot rocks the G-spot.
250
00:10:08,333 --> 00:10:11,933
So, scholar dancers,
you think this bad boy's a hit?
251
00:10:11,933 --> 00:10:13,033
[crowd cheering]
252
00:10:13,033 --> 00:10:13,967
(Gandhi)
* What's my name? *
253
00:10:13,967 --> 00:10:15,000
(all)
G-Spot!
254
00:10:15,000 --> 00:10:16,267
(Gandhi)
* What do I rock?
255
00:10:16,267 --> 00:10:17,300
* G-spot!
256
00:10:17,300 --> 00:10:19,800
* G-Spot rocks the G-spot
257
00:10:19,800 --> 00:10:22,167
(Cleopatra)
Abe, did you see me on TV?
258
00:10:22,167 --> 00:10:25,233
I saw you,
but you know what I didn't see?
259
00:10:25,233 --> 00:10:26,833
My letterman's jacket!
260
00:10:26,833 --> 00:10:28,333
And you know
where I didn't see it?
261
00:10:28,333 --> 00:10:29,600
On you!
262
00:10:29,600 --> 00:10:31,067
(Cleopatra)
What are you talking about?
263
00:10:31,067 --> 00:10:32,933
Of course I was wearing
your jacket.
264
00:10:32,933 --> 00:10:33,933
[Cleopatra laughs]
265
00:10:33,933 --> 00:10:34,933
Who's there with you?
266
00:10:34,933 --> 00:10:36,133
(Cleopatra)
Just Ashley.
267
00:10:36,133 --> 00:10:39,133
[laughing]
Stop tickling me. Stop!
268
00:10:39,133 --> 00:10:42,833
You call Professor Angel
by his first name?
269
00:10:42,833 --> 00:10:44,800
Hey, let me talk
to that dog.
270
00:10:44,800 --> 00:10:46,367
Don't worry, dog,
Cleo's in good hands.
271
00:10:46,367 --> 00:10:47,833
She's a real party girl.
272
00:10:47,833 --> 00:10:51,133
Well, don't expect her to party
with you, Professor.
273
00:10:51,133 --> 00:10:52,533
We have an agreement.
274
00:10:52,533 --> 00:10:54,633
Nothing below the eyebrows.
275
00:10:54,633 --> 00:10:56,300
Eyebrows?
276
00:10:56,300 --> 00:10:59,833
Dog, I'm an incredibly huge,
unbelievably famous celebrity.
277
00:10:59,833 --> 00:11:01,400
I'm completely hairless.
278
00:11:01,400 --> 00:11:02,833
So it's true!
279
00:11:04,100 --> 00:11:06,433
You've made a cuckold
out of me.
280
00:11:06,433 --> 00:11:07,733
Abe, wait!
281
00:11:07,733 --> 00:11:10,967
Send back my
letterman's jacket, Cleo.
282
00:11:10,967 --> 00:11:14,133
I'll need it to wipe my broken
heart off the floor...
283
00:11:14,133 --> 00:11:16,833
and to wear when it's chilly.
284
00:11:16,833 --> 00:11:19,867
My evil surgery certainly
won't be disturbed
285
00:11:19,867 --> 00:11:22,267
in this expensive china store.
286
00:11:22,267 --> 00:11:26,067
(Skunky-Poo)
Yoo-hoo!
287
00:11:26,067 --> 00:11:28,933
[siren blaring]
288
00:11:28,933 --> 00:11:30,700
[heart thumping]
289
00:11:30,700 --> 00:11:32,933
*
290
00:11:32,933 --> 00:11:36,067
Ma'am, I believe
this lipstick of dynamite
291
00:11:36,067 --> 00:11:37,300
belongs to you.
292
00:11:37,300 --> 00:11:39,067
*
293
00:11:39,067 --> 00:11:40,233
[loud booming]
294
00:11:40,233 --> 00:11:42,667
[screaming]
295
00:11:42,667 --> 00:11:45,233
That dynamite
really smarts!
296
00:11:45,233 --> 00:11:48,967
[screaming]
297
00:11:54,200 --> 00:11:57,100
[glass shattering]
298
00:11:58,167 --> 00:12:00,367
G-Spot, you claim
rhyming chose you,
299
00:12:00,367 --> 00:12:03,267
yet you have only one song,
which has only one rhyme,
300
00:12:03,267 --> 00:12:06,100
which is actually just
the same word repeated.
301
00:12:06,100 --> 00:12:08,567
Are you at least trying
to write another song?
302
00:12:08,567 --> 00:12:10,233
(Ghandi on recording)
* G-Spot rocks the G-spot
303
00:12:10,233 --> 00:12:11,867
[dolphin chirping]
304
00:12:11,867 --> 00:12:15,100
I could ask you
the same question.
305
00:12:15,100 --> 00:12:18,067
Are you trying
to write a hit song?
306
00:12:18,067 --> 00:12:19,500
I'm a reporter.
307
00:12:19,500 --> 00:12:20,967
(Ghandi on recording)
* G-Spot rocks the G-spot
308
00:12:20,967 --> 00:12:22,800
(woman)
This is the final
boarding announcement
309
00:12:22,800 --> 00:12:25,500
for flight 100
to Exclamation, USA.
310
00:12:25,500 --> 00:12:33,500
* Cleo!
311
00:12:33,500 --> 00:12:34,567
[gasps]
312
00:12:34,567 --> 00:12:36,567
Don't get on that plane.
313
00:12:36,567 --> 00:12:39,367
Ashley, what are you doing here?
314
00:12:39,367 --> 00:12:42,667
Stopping you from making
the biggest mistake of my life.
315
00:12:42,667 --> 00:12:44,700
I want to stay,
but I have to
316
00:12:44,700 --> 00:12:46,800
make things right
with my boyfriend...
317
00:12:48,700 --> 00:12:49,800
Abe.
318
00:12:49,800 --> 00:12:51,767
But you've got
so much talent, dog.
319
00:12:51,767 --> 00:12:54,100
I knew it the moment I felt you
grinding into my business.
320
00:12:54,100 --> 00:12:55,533
All aboard!
321
00:12:55,533 --> 00:12:58,767
All aboard
for Exclamation, USA.
322
00:13:00,200 --> 00:13:02,133
The girls who dance
on beach shows
323
00:13:02,133 --> 00:13:04,067
always achieve greatness.
324
00:13:04,067 --> 00:13:07,433
Look at Jenny McCarthy
and Maya Angelou.
325
00:13:07,433 --> 00:13:09,533
Don't you want
to be a star, dog?
326
00:13:09,533 --> 00:13:10,900
Of course.
327
00:13:10,900 --> 00:13:12,433
Everyone wants that,
328
00:13:12,433 --> 00:13:15,067
except ugly people who are
ashamed of the way they look.
329
00:13:16,200 --> 00:13:17,733
Then stay with me.
330
00:13:17,733 --> 00:13:20,633
We'll party on the beaches
of Canada every day,
331
00:13:20,633 --> 00:13:22,100
just you and me...
332
00:13:22,100 --> 00:13:24,200
[crowd cheering]
333
00:13:24,200 --> 00:13:25,500
And them.
334
00:13:25,500 --> 00:13:26,867
They follow me everywhere.
335
00:13:26,867 --> 00:13:27,867
[crowd cheering]
336
00:13:27,867 --> 00:13:30,367
I think my manager
pays them.
337
00:13:34,500 --> 00:13:37,400
[melancholy music]
338
00:13:37,400 --> 00:13:38,400
Surprise!
339
00:13:38,400 --> 00:13:39,400
[screams]
340
00:13:39,400 --> 00:13:40,567
You're not my science book!
341
00:13:40,567 --> 00:13:42,200
[metal clanging]
342
00:13:42,200 --> 00:13:44,267
Baby, I came back
to be with you,
343
00:13:44,267 --> 00:13:46,067
but you're not you.
344
00:13:46,067 --> 00:13:48,167
Where's the you
who gave me flowers,
345
00:13:48,167 --> 00:13:50,667
who massaged my thighs?
346
00:13:50,667 --> 00:13:52,500
Oh wait, that was
my tennis instructor.
347
00:13:52,500 --> 00:13:54,067
You lied, baby.
348
00:13:54,067 --> 00:13:56,067
You didn't wear
the letterman's jacket.
349
00:13:56,067 --> 00:13:57,600
Baby, I did wear it.
350
00:13:57,600 --> 00:13:58,933
I swear it, baby.
351
00:13:58,933 --> 00:14:01,633
Baby, I watched the show.
352
00:14:01,633 --> 00:14:03,300
I have eyes, you know.
353
00:14:03,300 --> 00:14:06,433
They're right under
my eyebrows!
354
00:14:06,433 --> 00:14:07,767
[gasps]
355
00:14:07,767 --> 00:14:10,633
[crying]
356
00:14:10,633 --> 00:14:13,467
*
357
00:14:13,467 --> 00:14:17,400
Everyone knows
skunks love free bacon.
358
00:14:17,400 --> 00:14:20,367
So when Skunky-Poo comes
to sample the treats,
359
00:14:20,367 --> 00:14:23,367
it won't be bacon
he'll get a taste of.
360
00:14:23,367 --> 00:14:25,767
Rather, it'll be
his own medicine!
361
00:14:26,867 --> 00:14:30,967
*
362
00:14:30,967 --> 00:14:32,600
[laughing and wheezing]
363
00:14:32,600 --> 00:14:33,867
*
364
00:14:33,867 --> 00:14:35,133
Ha-ha!
365
00:14:35,133 --> 00:14:37,167
*
366
00:14:37,167 --> 00:14:38,333
[pen squeaking]
367
00:14:39,767 --> 00:14:42,300
Free bacon for Scudworths?
368
00:14:42,300 --> 00:14:44,333
Why, I'm a Scudworth.
369
00:14:48,967 --> 00:14:49,967
[thud]
370
00:14:49,967 --> 00:14:52,867
Oh, my God!
The agony!
371
00:14:52,867 --> 00:14:54,233
Nothing could be worse
372
00:14:54,233 --> 00:14:57,900
than the pain I feel
at this moment!
373
00:14:57,900 --> 00:14:59,667
But at least I still have
374
00:14:59,667 --> 00:15:02,167
this bacon to enjoy.
375
00:15:04,833 --> 00:15:06,133
[loud booming]
376
00:15:06,133 --> 00:15:09,067
[screaming]
377
00:15:12,867 --> 00:15:14,767
[screaming]
Why, Skunky, why?
378
00:15:14,767 --> 00:15:16,100
(Ghandi on recording)
* G-Spot rocks...
379
00:15:16,100 --> 00:15:18,067
How do you put out an album
for every holiday,
380
00:15:18,067 --> 00:15:20,067
and I can't even
think of another song?
381
00:15:20,067 --> 00:15:22,667
You just gave me a great idea!
382
00:15:22,667 --> 00:15:27,667
What if we take a sample
of a song that already exists,
383
00:15:27,667 --> 00:15:31,233
and you rap over that sample?
384
00:15:31,233 --> 00:15:33,067
I call it...
385
00:15:33,067 --> 00:15:34,933
song-taking!
386
00:15:34,933 --> 00:15:37,067
Uh, wouldn't that be against
387
00:15:37,067 --> 00:15:39,333
the rapper's code
of originality?
388
00:15:41,733 --> 00:15:44,733
That's not dancing.
It's filth!
389
00:15:44,733 --> 00:15:46,933
It's letterman-jacketless filth!
390
00:15:48,233 --> 00:15:50,100
And I don't condone it!
391
00:15:50,100 --> 00:15:52,600
Abe, you need
to forget about Cleo
392
00:15:52,600 --> 00:15:55,200
and find yourself
a new girl.
393
00:15:55,200 --> 00:15:56,133
[clears throat]
394
00:15:57,233 --> 00:15:58,833
You're right,
Joan of Arc.
395
00:15:58,833 --> 00:16:02,333
I'm gonna turn off this tape
and find another girl,
396
00:16:02,333 --> 00:16:04,067
possibly a redhead.
397
00:16:04,067 --> 00:16:06,067
Yes, yes, yes,
yes, yes, yes!
398
00:16:06,067 --> 00:16:07,400
Wait, what's that?
399
00:16:07,400 --> 00:16:08,867
VCR, pause tape.
400
00:16:08,867 --> 00:16:10,967
What's that
around Cleo's neck?
401
00:16:10,967 --> 00:16:13,867
The world's
ugliest necklace.
402
00:16:13,867 --> 00:16:17,600
Probably a gift
from Ashley Angel from O-Town.
403
00:16:17,600 --> 00:16:20,067
VCR, zoom in
on Cleo's necklace.
404
00:16:20,067 --> 00:16:22,433
[mechanical beeping]
405
00:16:22,433 --> 00:16:23,567
My jacket!
406
00:16:23,567 --> 00:16:25,233
Joan, she did wear it!
407
00:16:25,233 --> 00:16:26,767
Whoo-hoo-hoo!
408
00:16:26,767 --> 00:16:27,800
Lucky me!
409
00:16:27,800 --> 00:16:29,600
No. No, no.
It doesn't count!
410
00:16:29,600 --> 00:16:31,900
The arms--the arms
aren't even through the sleeves!
411
00:16:31,900 --> 00:16:35,467
She violated the spirit
of your agreement.
412
00:16:35,467 --> 00:16:37,367
Telephone, dial Cleo's number.
413
00:16:37,367 --> 00:16:38,367
[beeping]
414
00:16:38,367 --> 00:16:39,867
Yo.
415
00:16:39,867 --> 00:16:41,100
Is Cleo there?
416
00:16:41,100 --> 00:16:43,100
[slurring]
Cleo's at the airport.
417
00:16:43,100 --> 00:16:46,567
She's going back to be
with Ashley Angel from O-Town.
418
00:16:46,567 --> 00:16:50,733
But I'm here, Abe,
if you want to party.
419
00:16:50,733 --> 00:16:51,833
Ew.
420
00:16:51,833 --> 00:16:57,800
Cleo!
421
00:16:57,800 --> 00:16:59,067
[gasps]
422
00:16:59,067 --> 00:17:01,800
Don't get on that plane.
423
00:17:01,800 --> 00:17:03,600
[gasps]
424
00:17:03,600 --> 00:17:04,600
[gasps]
425
00:17:04,600 --> 00:17:08,067
Buddy Holly!
426
00:17:08,067 --> 00:17:10,133
Is there any room on your plane?
427
00:17:10,133 --> 00:17:11,367
Well, let me see.
428
00:17:11,367 --> 00:17:13,433
It's me, Ritchie Valens,
the Big Bopper,
429
00:17:13,433 --> 00:17:18,300
Jim Croce, Stevie Ray Vaughan,
and half of Lynyrd Skynyrd.
430
00:17:18,300 --> 00:17:20,767
Yeah, I guess there's room
for one more.
431
00:17:20,767 --> 00:17:21,967
[clattering]
432
00:17:23,067 --> 00:17:25,133
Oh...
433
00:17:25,133 --> 00:17:26,467
okay.
434
00:17:26,467 --> 00:17:30,067
Abe!
435
00:17:30,067 --> 00:17:32,067
Don't get on that plane.
436
00:17:32,067 --> 00:17:33,967
I can't stand
to not see you
437
00:17:33,967 --> 00:17:36,400
not make the biggest mistake
of one of our lives.
438
00:17:36,400 --> 00:17:37,400
What?
439
00:17:37,400 --> 00:17:39,067
Huh?
None of that matters.
440
00:17:39,067 --> 00:17:41,800
Cleo's flight has
a layover in Atlanta City.
441
00:17:41,800 --> 00:17:44,467
If we drive,
we can meet her there,
442
00:17:44,467 --> 00:17:46,767
and it'll save you
three days' travel time.
443
00:17:46,767 --> 00:17:47,767
[exasperated sigh]
444
00:17:47,767 --> 00:17:49,100
And about $90.
445
00:17:49,100 --> 00:17:50,200
Done.
446
00:17:50,200 --> 00:17:51,300
Thanks, pal.
447
00:17:51,300 --> 00:17:52,767
Let's roll!
448
00:17:52,767 --> 00:17:57,367
Scudworth!
449
00:17:57,367 --> 00:17:59,233
Don't get on that plane!
450
00:18:03,100 --> 00:18:11,300
Cleo!
451
00:18:11,300 --> 00:18:12,433
[gasps]
452
00:18:12,433 --> 00:18:15,133
Don't get on that plane!
453
00:18:15,133 --> 00:18:18,067
I saw the necklace, Cleo.
I saw it!
454
00:18:18,067 --> 00:18:19,300
Oh, Abe.
455
00:18:19,300 --> 00:18:21,433
I wore the jacket
in Ashley's hot tub,
456
00:18:21,433 --> 00:18:22,433
and it shrank.
457
00:18:22,433 --> 00:18:24,967
Ashley's hot tub?
458
00:18:24,967 --> 00:18:27,067
All that doesn't matter, baby.
459
00:18:27,067 --> 00:18:28,667
Just come home with me.
460
00:18:28,667 --> 00:18:30,500
We'll start a new life together.
461
00:18:30,500 --> 00:18:32,800
Abe, I want that
more than anything.
462
00:18:32,800 --> 00:18:35,767
But, you see, when I'm 25
and looking back on my life,
463
00:18:35,767 --> 00:18:39,700
I don't want to regret
not getting on this plane.
464
00:18:39,700 --> 00:18:41,733
[whispering]
You were the one.
465
00:18:45,800 --> 00:18:48,800
[melancholy music]
466
00:18:48,800 --> 00:18:53,800
*
467
00:18:53,800 --> 00:19:00,367
(man)
* I, I don't wanna forget *
468
00:19:00,367 --> 00:19:05,067
* How we got this far
469
00:19:05,067 --> 00:19:06,433
[screams]
470
00:19:06,433 --> 00:19:07,600
Cleo!
471
00:19:07,600 --> 00:19:09,900
But I--
how did you--
472
00:19:09,900 --> 00:19:12,500
Love works
in mysterious ways.
473
00:19:12,500 --> 00:19:13,500
But you were just--
474
00:19:13,500 --> 00:19:15,733
Shh.
475
00:19:15,733 --> 00:19:19,833
(man)
* I close my eyes
and drift away *
476
00:19:19,833 --> 00:19:22,800
[fireworks popping and hissing]
477
00:19:22,800 --> 00:19:24,467
Thanks, Joan.
478
00:19:24,467 --> 00:19:27,467
I'm kissing my girlfriend
because of you.
479
00:19:27,467 --> 00:19:28,733
*
480
00:19:28,733 --> 00:19:31,167
Dinger.
481
00:19:31,167 --> 00:19:33,567
Yo, cabana boy!
482
00:19:33,567 --> 00:19:37,400
Bring me a hot dog
with a side of catsup!
483
00:19:37,400 --> 00:19:40,200
*
484
00:19:40,200 --> 00:19:43,900
This catsup will really
spice up my dog.
485
00:19:43,900 --> 00:19:45,167
*
486
00:19:45,167 --> 00:19:46,567
Darn it.
487
00:19:46,567 --> 00:19:50,933
It seems to be blocked
by some sort of lit fuse.
488
00:19:50,933 --> 00:19:51,933
[loud booming]
489
00:19:51,933 --> 00:19:53,400
[screaming]
490
00:19:56,700 --> 00:19:58,533
[screaming]
491
00:19:58,533 --> 00:20:00,200
Ah-ha!
492
00:20:00,200 --> 00:20:03,633
*
493
00:20:03,633 --> 00:20:07,667
It is I,
Ashley Angel from O-Town.
494
00:20:07,667 --> 00:20:10,633
Anyway, I'm here
with a brand-new video.
495
00:20:10,633 --> 00:20:14,667
It's G-Spot's follow-up,
"UR A G Old Flag."
496
00:20:14,667 --> 00:20:16,133
*
497
00:20:16,133 --> 00:20:18,500
Oh, yeah.
498
00:20:18,500 --> 00:20:22,233
(JFK)
* You're a grand old flag,
you're a high-flying flag *
499
00:20:22,233 --> 00:20:23,733
Flag.
500
00:20:23,733 --> 00:20:25,467
(JFK)
* And forever in peace
may you wave *
501
00:20:25,467 --> 00:20:27,100
Wave, ya'll.
502
00:20:27,100 --> 00:20:30,133
(JFK)
* You're the emblem
of the land I love *
503
00:20:30,133 --> 00:20:31,567
Emblem.
504
00:20:31,567 --> 00:20:33,467
(JFK)
* The home of the free
and the brave *
505
00:20:33,467 --> 00:20:35,200
Uh-huh, uh-huh,
uh-huh, uh-huh.
506
00:20:35,200 --> 00:20:38,100
(JFK)
* Every heart beats true
for the red, white, and blue *
507
00:20:38,100 --> 00:20:39,700
One time,
two time.
508
00:20:39,700 --> 00:20:42,400
(JFK)
* Where there's never
a boast or brag *
509
00:20:42,400 --> 00:20:43,900
Do the Bartman.
510
00:20:43,900 --> 00:20:46,533
(JFK)
* Should auld acquaintance
be forgot *
511
00:20:46,533 --> 00:20:48,067
Uh-huh.
Uh-huh.
512
00:20:48,067 --> 00:20:50,433
(JFK)
* Keep your, uh, eye
on the grand old flag *
513
00:20:50,433 --> 00:20:52,000
Oh, yeah.
Flag!
514
00:20:52,000 --> 00:20:56,633
(narrator)
Next time,
on a very special Clone High...
515
00:20:56,633 --> 00:20:59,233
* Bow-chicka-bow-bow
516
00:20:59,233 --> 00:21:01,267
* Bow-chicka-bow-bow
517
00:21:01,267 --> 00:21:03,667
Girl fight.
518
00:21:03,667 --> 00:21:06,300
(Abandoned Pools singing)
* Way, way back in the 1980s
519
00:21:06,300 --> 00:21:09,233
* Secret government
employees *
520
00:21:09,233 --> 00:21:11,967
* Dug up famous
guys and ladies *
521
00:21:11,967 --> 00:21:14,967
* And made amusing
genetic copies *
522
00:21:14,967 --> 00:21:17,867
* Now the clones
are sexy teens now *
523
00:21:17,867 --> 00:21:20,833
* They're gonna make
it if they try *
524
00:21:20,833 --> 00:21:23,700
* Loving, learning,
sharing, judging *
525
00:21:23,700 --> 00:21:29,867
* Time to laugh and
shiver and cry *
526
00:21:29,867 --> 00:21:32,800
* Clone High
32836
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