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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:19,410 --> 00:00:22,979 [dramatic orchestral music] 2 00:02:00,685 --> 00:02:03,166 [wind blowing] 3 00:02:08,650 --> 00:02:11,609 [men chattering] 4 00:02:14,656 --> 00:02:15,918 - [Man] Come on Harry. 5 00:02:15,961 --> 00:02:19,226 [men talking over each other] 6 00:02:19,269 --> 00:02:20,966 - All right, all right, all right, all right. 7 00:02:21,010 --> 00:02:22,968 So it's not Gone with the Wind, 8 00:02:23,012 --> 00:02:25,014 but for 60,000 bucks, what do you want? 9 00:02:25,057 --> 00:02:26,363 - A hit? 10 00:02:26,407 --> 00:02:28,626 - Oh, you're cute Benny, you're real cute. 11 00:02:28,670 --> 00:02:31,629 - Hey Harry, they're tired of cheerleaders. 12 00:02:31,673 --> 00:02:33,022 They're tired of nurses. 13 00:02:33,065 --> 00:02:34,415 Now if we're gonna keep making these things, 14 00:02:34,458 --> 00:02:36,504 we need a new gimmick, something fresh. 15 00:02:36,547 --> 00:02:38,288 - [Benny] That's right. 16 00:02:38,332 --> 00:02:40,029 - Hey, we're hardly breaking even. 17 00:02:40,072 --> 00:02:42,727 This is bird doody compared to what we could be making. 18 00:02:42,771 --> 00:02:44,076 - [Benny] That's right. 19 00:02:44,120 --> 00:02:45,208 - [Man] Hey, maybe the bloom's off the rose 20 00:02:45,252 --> 00:02:46,949 with porno, Harry. 21 00:02:46,992 --> 00:02:48,124 Maybe we ought to get into commodities. 22 00:02:48,168 --> 00:02:49,343 - [Benny] That's right. 23 00:02:49,386 --> 00:02:50,953 - Look, what's the matter with you guys? 24 00:02:50,996 --> 00:02:52,346 I made you guys a lot of money. 25 00:02:52,389 --> 00:02:55,653 All right, so the last picture didn't do too well. 26 00:02:55,697 --> 00:02:57,916 The last couple weren't huge hits, but come on. 27 00:02:57,960 --> 00:03:01,398 I got some great ideas, some great ideas. 28 00:03:01,442 --> 00:03:04,880 - Yeah well, come on, let's hear some of them. 29 00:03:04,923 --> 00:03:05,663 - Well, 30 00:03:09,363 --> 00:03:10,886 they're great ideas. 31 00:03:10,929 --> 00:03:13,671 [men mumbling] 32 00:03:17,936 --> 00:03:20,200 [coughing] 33 00:03:28,643 --> 00:03:30,732 - Come on, Harry. 34 00:03:30,775 --> 00:03:32,516 Let's end this misery. 35 00:03:32,560 --> 00:03:34,170 Just sell us the studio. 36 00:03:34,214 --> 00:03:35,432 With all this acreage, 37 00:03:35,476 --> 00:03:38,000 we could put up a beautiful shopping center. 38 00:03:38,043 --> 00:03:39,654 We'd be much better off, right? 39 00:03:39,697 --> 00:03:41,003 - Shopping center? 40 00:03:41,046 --> 00:03:43,962 Come on, look, I told you guys a million times, 41 00:03:44,006 --> 00:03:47,183 as long as my father is alive I'm not selling this studio. 42 00:03:47,227 --> 00:03:48,489 What, do you want me to kill him? 43 00:03:48,532 --> 00:03:51,448 It'd kill him if he knew I was making porno. 44 00:03:51,492 --> 00:03:54,930 He still thinks I'm making the kind of pictures he made. 45 00:03:54,973 --> 00:03:57,454 I mean, look at that old man. 46 00:04:00,805 --> 00:04:04,635 Look, he built this studio from nothing. 47 00:04:04,679 --> 00:04:06,898 He poured his guts into it. 48 00:04:06,942 --> 00:04:08,813 All right, so he wasn't Fox. 49 00:04:08,857 --> 00:04:11,555 He wasn't Warner, hell he wasn't even Republic, 50 00:04:11,599 --> 00:04:16,256 but he kept this studio alive and I'm not selling him out. 51 00:04:16,299 --> 00:04:19,346 - Well, then tell us an idea already. 52 00:04:20,521 --> 00:04:22,436 - Look, Harry, 53 00:04:22,479 --> 00:04:24,960 we have done every kind of filth there is. 54 00:04:25,003 --> 00:04:26,048 Everything, you name it. 55 00:04:26,091 --> 00:04:27,876 Nothing. 56 00:04:27,919 --> 00:04:29,312 - Let's do one about a deer. 57 00:04:29,356 --> 00:04:32,924 Call it, Anything for a Buck, A Stag Film. 58 00:04:32,968 --> 00:04:35,362 [laughing] 59 00:04:40,845 --> 00:04:42,369 I'll just go sit at my desk. 60 00:04:42,412 --> 00:04:43,979 - Look, you're in big trouble, Harry. 61 00:04:44,022 --> 00:04:46,329 And all she can do is make jokes. 62 00:04:46,373 --> 00:04:48,462 - Oh no, I can dance too. 63 00:04:50,986 --> 00:04:51,900 Great, huh? 64 00:04:54,772 --> 00:04:57,166 [soft music] 65 00:04:58,036 --> 00:05:00,169 Well, not in these shoes. 66 00:05:00,212 --> 00:05:01,692 I have tap shoes. 67 00:05:03,085 --> 00:05:05,348 - She just danced in here. 68 00:05:05,392 --> 00:05:07,089 I don't believe it. 69 00:05:07,132 --> 00:05:11,833 She came in, and she told a joke, and she danced. 70 00:05:11,876 --> 00:05:14,488 I'm surprised she didn't sing, too. 71 00:05:14,531 --> 00:05:15,402 - I can sing. 72 00:05:15,445 --> 00:05:17,926 - [Man] Hey, we got business. 73 00:05:21,233 --> 00:05:21,973 - This is turkey doody. 74 00:05:22,017 --> 00:05:24,106 - Oh, come on, Harry. 75 00:05:24,149 --> 00:05:28,023 Let's stop putzing around, now give us an idea. 76 00:05:29,590 --> 00:05:30,591 - All right. 77 00:05:31,418 --> 00:05:32,941 You want an idea? 78 00:05:34,116 --> 00:05:35,900 I'll give you an idea. 79 00:05:37,075 --> 00:05:39,991 Ah Jesus Christ, what an idea! 80 00:05:40,035 --> 00:05:41,471 - Well, what is it? 81 00:05:48,086 --> 00:05:49,044 - You ready? 82 00:05:49,087 --> 00:05:51,133 - We're ready already. 83 00:05:53,309 --> 00:05:54,876 We are going to make 84 00:05:56,138 --> 00:06:00,360 the first porno musical. 85 00:06:02,057 --> 00:06:03,363 - We're what? 86 00:06:03,406 --> 00:06:05,147 - What the fuck are you talking about? 87 00:06:05,190 --> 00:06:06,061 A musical? 88 00:06:06,104 --> 00:06:07,279 A porno musical? 89 00:06:07,323 --> 00:06:08,933 - That's right, a musical. 90 00:06:08,977 --> 00:06:11,719 Look, think about it for a minute, huh? 91 00:06:11,762 --> 00:06:13,895 Look at all that hardcore crap. 92 00:06:13,938 --> 00:06:16,550 People don't need to go to the movies to see hard core. 93 00:06:16,593 --> 00:06:21,076 They want something new, like you said, something different. 94 00:06:21,119 --> 00:06:22,817 They don't want to see any more licking. 95 00:06:22,860 --> 00:06:25,080 They've seen enough licking pictures. 96 00:06:25,123 --> 00:06:27,038 Genitalia, it's boring. 97 00:06:29,214 --> 00:06:31,565 But singing genitalia? 98 00:06:32,304 --> 00:06:34,176 Oh, gentlemen. 99 00:06:35,090 --> 00:06:35,917 Come on. 100 00:06:35,960 --> 00:06:37,875 [guys moaning] 101 00:06:37,919 --> 00:06:38,876 - Of course, you don't know. 102 00:06:38,920 --> 00:06:40,443 Nobody knows, but I'm telling you, 103 00:06:40,487 --> 00:06:42,314 this can revolutionize the business. 104 00:06:42,358 --> 00:06:43,838 - Nah, it's never been done. 105 00:06:43,881 --> 00:06:45,970 - Of course it's never been done. 106 00:06:46,014 --> 00:06:49,191 Have a little vision, vision and foresight. 107 00:06:49,234 --> 00:06:51,280 What, do you think those schmucks uptown just said, 108 00:06:51,323 --> 00:06:54,326 let have color, let's have sound, let's have cinema scope? 109 00:06:54,370 --> 00:06:56,590 No, no, somebody had a vision, 110 00:06:56,633 --> 00:07:01,159 and the rest of the jerks just got on the bandwagon, huh? 111 00:07:01,203 --> 00:07:02,987 Look, Eddie. 112 00:07:03,031 --> 00:07:04,902 We can make film history. 113 00:07:06,251 --> 00:07:08,036 We can be millionaires. 114 00:07:08,079 --> 00:07:09,080 - Yeah, I know. 115 00:07:09,124 --> 00:07:10,734 But can we make any money? 116 00:07:11,518 --> 00:07:12,954 - Can we make any money? 117 00:07:12,997 --> 00:07:17,698 Look, this isn't hype gentlemen, this is the real thing. 118 00:07:17,741 --> 00:07:20,396 Look gentlemen, listen. 119 00:07:20,440 --> 00:07:23,051 [piano music] 120 00:07:23,965 --> 00:07:27,882 ♪ The color, the camera, the lights and the action ♪ 121 00:07:27,925 --> 00:07:30,928 ♪ Can't you see it on the screen ♪ 122 00:07:30,972 --> 00:07:34,976 ♪ The bare breasts, the bare asses passing your way ♪ 123 00:07:35,019 --> 00:07:38,849 ♪ Fellas do you see what I mean ♪ 124 00:07:38,893 --> 00:07:42,026 ♪ This can be the biggest grosser since the word gross ♪ 125 00:07:42,070 --> 00:07:45,987 ♪ And the word gross really says it like it is ♪ 126 00:07:46,030 --> 00:07:50,339 ♪ There is no one, no sir who has ever been close ♪ 127 00:07:50,382 --> 00:07:55,170 ♪ To making such a fortune be his ♪ 128 00:07:55,213 --> 00:08:00,262 ♪ It's the first nudie musical 129 00:08:00,305 --> 00:08:02,525 ♪ What a great thing 130 00:08:02,569 --> 00:08:04,005 ♪ Take them to the brink 131 00:08:04,048 --> 00:08:07,008 ♪ Then have them break out and sing ♪ 132 00:08:07,051 --> 00:08:09,401 ♪ The first nudie musical 133 00:08:09,445 --> 00:08:11,621 ♪ Oh, what a success 134 00:08:11,665 --> 00:08:16,147 ♪ Even the chorus, for us will undress ♪ 135 00:08:16,191 --> 00:08:18,585 ♪ The first nudie musical 136 00:08:18,628 --> 00:08:21,065 ♪ Wow, gee, how swell 137 00:08:21,109 --> 00:08:22,850 ♪ How much money this can make 138 00:08:22,893 --> 00:08:25,069 ♪ You never can tell 139 00:08:25,113 --> 00:08:27,158 ♪ The first nudie musical 140 00:08:27,202 --> 00:08:29,770 ♪ What songs can we use 141 00:08:29,813 --> 00:08:33,948 ♪ Show songs and rock songs even rhythm and blues ♪ 142 00:08:33,991 --> 00:08:36,211 ♪ Can you see it 143 00:08:36,254 --> 00:08:38,953 ♪ We can see it 144 00:08:38,996 --> 00:08:42,130 ♪ Gotta sing, gotta dance 145 00:08:42,173 --> 00:08:44,654 ♪ While I'm taking off my pants ♪ 146 00:08:44,698 --> 00:08:45,655 - That's right. 147 00:08:45,699 --> 00:08:48,615 ♪ Gotta move, gotta croon 148 00:08:48,658 --> 00:08:52,009 ♪ While I'm busting out all over June ♪ 149 00:08:52,053 --> 00:08:57,101 ♪ In the first, very first, nudie musical ♪ 150 00:08:59,669 --> 00:09:02,019 - Gentlemen, just think, 151 00:09:02,063 --> 00:09:03,847 there'll be girls. 152 00:09:03,891 --> 00:09:04,674 - Girls. 153 00:09:09,287 --> 00:09:12,682 [upbeat show tune jazz] 154 00:10:03,167 --> 00:10:08,129 ♪ The first nudie musical 155 00:10:09,783 --> 00:10:14,788 ♪ Genius abounds 156 00:10:16,398 --> 00:10:17,965 ♪ Think how good it's gonna look ♪ 157 00:10:18,008 --> 00:10:20,141 ♪ As good as it sounds 158 00:10:20,184 --> 00:10:22,491 ♪ The first nudie musical 159 00:10:22,534 --> 00:10:24,624 ♪ A masterly thought 160 00:10:24,667 --> 00:10:28,976 ♪ As long as we film fast and never get caught ♪ 161 00:10:29,019 --> 00:10:32,675 ♪ Think of the tickets that are gonna be bought ♪ 162 00:10:32,719 --> 00:10:36,026 ♪ What an idea, so let's go film it real fast ♪ 163 00:10:36,070 --> 00:10:38,463 ♪ The first, very first, and last ♪ 164 00:10:38,507 --> 00:10:41,075 ♪ Nudie musical 165 00:10:50,998 --> 00:10:52,913 - Oh, wonderful! 166 00:10:52,956 --> 00:10:57,874 [talking over each other excitedly] 167 00:10:57,918 --> 00:11:01,443 - Hey Harry, I think we got a winner here, buddy. 168 00:11:01,486 --> 00:11:02,923 - Harry baby, when do we start? 169 00:11:02,966 --> 00:11:04,141 - Right away, Rosie? 170 00:11:04,185 --> 00:11:04,968 - What? 171 00:11:06,056 --> 00:11:07,405 - We got our next project. 172 00:11:07,449 --> 00:11:08,972 Get your pad. - I've got my pad. 173 00:11:09,016 --> 00:11:10,887 - Sit. - I'm sitting. 174 00:11:10,931 --> 00:11:12,628 This is gonna be a good one, I can tell. 175 00:11:12,672 --> 00:11:13,585 - All right, all right, wait. 176 00:11:13,629 --> 00:11:15,718 Now is everybody in? 177 00:11:15,762 --> 00:11:17,285 - Harry, you'd better excuse us. 178 00:11:17,328 --> 00:11:19,940 We're going to have a meeting. 179 00:11:21,506 --> 00:11:22,159 - I think I got 'em, Rosie. 180 00:11:22,203 --> 00:11:23,508 If they go for this, 181 00:11:23,552 --> 00:11:25,946 it's gonna be classy and straight up for now on. 182 00:11:25,989 --> 00:11:27,121 We can make normal pictures again. 183 00:11:27,164 --> 00:11:28,600 - Wouldn't that be great? 184 00:11:28,644 --> 00:11:31,908 Then we wouldn't have to keep your father off the lot. 185 00:11:31,952 --> 00:11:34,606 - Okay Harry, here's the deal. 186 00:11:35,869 --> 00:11:39,742 We'll invest half, and we'll loan half. 187 00:11:39,786 --> 00:11:41,831 - What do you mean, you'll invest half 188 00:11:41,875 --> 00:11:43,398 and you'll loan half? 189 00:11:43,441 --> 00:11:46,749 - I mean, we'll invest half, we'll loan half. 190 00:11:46,793 --> 00:11:48,882 We'll take the studio on the hock, that's the deal. 191 00:11:48,925 --> 00:11:50,535 Take it or leave it. 192 00:11:54,278 --> 00:11:55,715 - What are you pacing for? 193 00:11:55,758 --> 00:11:58,108 You're not gonna do this, they'll screw you. 194 00:11:58,152 --> 00:12:00,894 - I'm screwed if I don't do it. 195 00:12:02,722 --> 00:12:04,375 I don't know, I just, 196 00:12:05,768 --> 00:12:08,815 I just have a feeling about this one. 197 00:12:13,167 --> 00:12:16,213 All right, all right, you got yourself a deal. 198 00:12:18,650 --> 00:12:20,261 All right now, Rosie, take this down. 199 00:12:20,304 --> 00:12:23,786 We're gonna need sets, costumes. 200 00:12:23,830 --> 00:12:25,396 - Costumes, you mean clothing? 201 00:12:25,440 --> 00:12:26,963 - Yeah, yeah. 202 00:12:27,007 --> 00:12:28,312 Actors. 203 00:12:28,356 --> 00:12:29,923 - Actors? Where are we gonna get people 204 00:12:29,966 --> 00:12:31,925 who can screw and carry a tune? 205 00:12:31,968 --> 00:12:35,406 - We'll advertise, there's plenty of talent in town. 206 00:12:35,450 --> 00:12:40,455 Oh wait, we need someone to choreograph, someone to direct. 207 00:12:41,064 --> 00:12:41,978 - I got the guy. 208 00:12:42,022 --> 00:12:43,066 I got the guy. 209 00:12:43,110 --> 00:12:45,329 - You got the guy, who, what, who? 210 00:12:45,373 --> 00:12:48,593 - My nephew, John Smithee. 211 00:12:50,247 --> 00:12:51,988 - I know it's silly of me to ask Benny, 212 00:12:52,032 --> 00:12:55,383 but has he ever directed a picture before? 213 00:12:55,426 --> 00:12:59,126 - Look, that kid's smart, he'll learn. 214 00:12:59,169 --> 00:13:00,083 - Learn? 215 00:13:00,127 --> 00:13:01,389 Look, listen Benny. 216 00:13:01,432 --> 00:13:02,912 - No, you listen. 217 00:13:03,957 --> 00:13:07,612 Either he does it, or it don't get done. 218 00:13:07,656 --> 00:13:09,049 Right boys? 219 00:13:09,092 --> 00:13:10,485 - Right. 220 00:13:10,528 --> 00:13:11,573 - Yeah, all right, all right, all right. 221 00:13:11,616 --> 00:13:12,443 We'll work it out. 222 00:13:12,487 --> 00:13:14,576 - Don't worry about a thing. 223 00:13:14,619 --> 00:13:16,273 The kid is great. 224 00:13:16,317 --> 00:13:17,840 - Where were we? 225 00:13:17,884 --> 00:13:21,017 - Sets, costumes, actors, script? 226 00:13:22,018 --> 00:13:23,367 - Script. 227 00:13:23,411 --> 00:13:24,194 Script. 228 00:13:26,109 --> 00:13:27,241 Here we are. 229 00:13:27,284 --> 00:13:28,633 Come Come Now. 230 00:13:28,677 --> 00:13:30,679 We got your girls, we got your yaks. 231 00:13:30,722 --> 00:13:33,421 All we have to do is throw in the songs. 232 00:13:33,464 --> 00:13:35,031 - Songs, songwriter. 233 00:13:35,902 --> 00:13:37,642 - A songwriter. 234 00:13:39,557 --> 00:13:40,863 I know the guy. 235 00:13:40,907 --> 00:13:41,864 Good friend of mine, Dick Davis, 236 00:13:41,908 --> 00:13:43,039 not only a good song writer, 237 00:13:43,083 --> 00:13:45,041 he's the biggest pervert I know. 238 00:13:45,085 --> 00:13:48,088 - Dick Davis, songwriter and pervert. 239 00:13:48,131 --> 00:13:50,177 - Well, we gotta be going Harry, 240 00:13:50,220 --> 00:13:52,222 but before we go, 241 00:13:52,266 --> 00:13:54,485 there's just one slight stipulation. 242 00:13:54,529 --> 00:13:55,878 - What's that? 243 00:13:55,922 --> 00:13:58,881 - You gotta stick to the original timetable. 244 00:13:58,925 --> 00:14:02,058 You got two weeks to shoot this masterpiece. 245 00:14:02,102 --> 00:14:05,192 - Two weeks, for a musical, two weeks? 246 00:14:05,235 --> 00:14:06,671 - Don't sweat it, Harry. 247 00:14:06,715 --> 00:14:08,935 You did Kiss My Boots in three days. 248 00:14:08,978 --> 00:14:11,198 - That had eight lines of dialogue and 17 orgasms. 249 00:14:11,241 --> 00:14:14,288 This is a musical, a musical movie. 250 00:14:14,331 --> 00:14:17,204 - Two weeks, Harry, you know the deal. 251 00:14:17,247 --> 00:14:19,902 You go over schedule, you go over budget, 252 00:14:19,946 --> 00:14:21,338 we take over the studio. 253 00:14:21,382 --> 00:14:22,122 You're out. 254 00:14:22,165 --> 00:14:23,166 - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 255 00:14:23,210 --> 00:14:24,994 I know the terms, I know the terms. 256 00:14:25,038 --> 00:14:27,388 - Then let's get the hell out of here, come on. 257 00:14:35,396 --> 00:14:36,397 - Two weeks. 258 00:14:39,095 --> 00:14:39,879 Schmucks. 259 00:14:43,665 --> 00:14:44,361 Rosie! 260 00:14:44,405 --> 00:14:45,188 - What? 261 00:14:47,103 --> 00:14:48,670 - Look, Rosie. 262 00:14:48,713 --> 00:14:50,846 Look, I really stepped in it this time, huh? 263 00:14:50,890 --> 00:14:53,762 But I know I can do it, I know we can do it. 264 00:14:53,805 --> 00:14:56,417 Goddamn it, I'm gonna make my father proud. 265 00:14:56,460 --> 00:14:57,853 - Or dead. 266 00:14:57,897 --> 00:14:59,115 - Yeah. 267 00:14:59,159 --> 00:15:00,812 Look, get the advertisements in the paper. 268 00:15:00,856 --> 00:15:03,598 I want them all out today, all right? 269 00:15:03,641 --> 00:15:06,122 We can do it, we can do it, I know we can do it. 270 00:15:06,166 --> 00:15:08,211 Tell me we can do it. 271 00:15:08,255 --> 00:15:11,388 - We can do it Harry, we can do it, we can do it. 272 00:15:11,432 --> 00:15:14,652 - Get the advertisements in the paper. 273 00:15:19,048 --> 00:15:20,093 Sets, 274 00:15:21,616 --> 00:15:22,399 costumes, 275 00:15:24,662 --> 00:15:27,448 Jesus Christ, two weeks. 276 00:15:31,495 --> 00:15:34,934 [uptempo big band jazz] 277 00:15:37,675 --> 00:15:38,981 - Hey, far out! 278 00:15:46,641 --> 00:15:47,772 - Hey, Arvin? 279 00:15:53,691 --> 00:15:55,867 - I told you never to call me that. 280 00:15:55,911 --> 00:15:58,044 I could kill my mother for naming me that. 281 00:15:58,087 --> 00:15:58,914 You, 282 00:16:00,089 --> 00:16:02,570 you call me, Riff. 283 00:16:05,355 --> 00:16:06,922 - All right already. 284 00:16:06,966 --> 00:16:07,749 Riff. 285 00:16:09,098 --> 00:16:12,710 I think you see West Side Story too many times. 286 00:16:12,754 --> 00:16:15,452 I going to see a man about a film. 287 00:16:19,326 --> 00:16:21,067 - What kind of film? 288 00:16:21,110 --> 00:16:24,287 - I don't know, some kind of musical. 289 00:16:24,331 --> 00:16:27,290 - Just don't touch anybody, that's all. 290 00:16:27,334 --> 00:16:28,335 No touching. 291 00:16:29,814 --> 00:16:33,862 If there's touching, then I'm going to kill somebody. 292 00:16:33,905 --> 00:16:34,994 - What is this? 293 00:16:35,037 --> 00:16:38,127 You think I touch everybody I see? 294 00:16:38,171 --> 00:16:41,696 Arvin, sometimes I think you're some kind of a freak. 295 00:16:41,739 --> 00:16:44,481 - Riff, Riff, look, I'm a tough shit. 296 00:16:44,525 --> 00:16:46,875 Tough shits aren't named Arvin. 297 00:16:48,007 --> 00:16:50,835 - Oh, who cares anyway? 298 00:16:50,879 --> 00:16:52,011 You big burrito. 299 00:16:54,100 --> 00:16:56,580 I love you, and I'm going. 300 00:17:00,062 --> 00:17:01,846 See you later, Arvin. 301 00:17:01,890 --> 00:17:03,848 - Riff, Riff. 302 00:17:09,680 --> 00:17:10,899 Bam! 303 00:17:10,942 --> 00:17:14,033 [upbeat big band jazz] 304 00:17:38,231 --> 00:17:39,058 - Hello. 305 00:17:44,150 --> 00:17:45,716 - Do you know anything about this? 306 00:17:45,760 --> 00:17:47,109 - Oh, just what the ad said. 307 00:17:47,153 --> 00:17:48,676 - Well, do we have to be able to dance? 308 00:17:48,719 --> 00:17:51,113 - Well, yeah, it said, bring tap shoes, 309 00:17:51,157 --> 00:17:54,073 rehearsal clothes, possible nudity, 310 00:17:54,116 --> 00:17:56,945 and they don't want any albinos. 311 00:17:56,988 --> 00:17:58,251 - Is this SAG? 312 00:17:58,294 --> 00:17:59,078 - SAG? 313 00:18:01,950 --> 00:18:02,429 - Hi there. 314 00:18:02,472 --> 00:18:03,560 - Hi. 315 00:18:03,604 --> 00:18:05,345 - My name is George, George Brenner. 316 00:18:05,388 --> 00:18:05,780 What's yours? 317 00:18:05,823 --> 00:18:07,173 - Jane. 318 00:18:07,216 --> 00:18:11,264 - Hey Jane, that's really a beautiful name, Jane. 319 00:18:11,307 --> 00:18:12,917 - Why do I feel if my name was Sonny 320 00:18:12,961 --> 00:18:15,181 that you'd think it was pretty? 321 00:18:15,224 --> 00:18:17,052 - Hey, easy. 322 00:18:20,490 --> 00:18:21,404 - Joy Full. 323 00:18:22,797 --> 00:18:24,277 Oh, Miss Full? 324 00:18:24,320 --> 00:18:25,756 - Oh, that's me. 325 00:18:33,634 --> 00:18:36,376 This is Miss Full, Joy Full. 326 00:18:40,902 --> 00:18:42,033 Do you believe it? 327 00:18:42,077 --> 00:18:43,774 - Yes I do. 328 00:18:43,818 --> 00:18:45,646 Hello, Miss Full. 329 00:18:47,691 --> 00:18:48,475 I'm Harry Schechter. 330 00:18:48,518 --> 00:18:50,259 This is Eddie Smirnoff. 331 00:18:50,825 --> 00:18:52,261 My secretary, Rosie, 332 00:18:52,305 --> 00:18:56,787 and the man at the piano is our composer, Dick Davis. 333 00:18:59,442 --> 00:19:00,226 - Hi. 334 00:19:01,966 --> 00:19:06,971 - Well, would you like tell us a little bit about yourself? 335 00:19:07,015 --> 00:19:08,930 What have you done? 336 00:19:08,973 --> 00:19:12,063 - Oh, I've done fellatio, 337 00:19:13,369 --> 00:19:15,110 and straight fucking, 338 00:19:16,285 --> 00:19:18,896 and some minor beastiality, too. 339 00:19:21,029 --> 00:19:22,683 - Okay. 340 00:19:22,726 --> 00:19:26,513 Well, would you like to do a little something for us? 341 00:19:26,556 --> 00:19:27,340 - Sure. 342 00:19:41,005 --> 00:19:43,182 [panting] 343 00:19:47,447 --> 00:19:49,884 [squealing] 344 00:19:58,109 --> 00:19:58,936 - Thank you. 345 00:19:58,980 --> 00:20:00,155 Thank you, Miss Full. 346 00:20:00,199 --> 00:20:00,982 That was 347 00:20:03,550 --> 00:20:04,333 very good. 348 00:20:05,813 --> 00:20:09,338 Look, I don't know if you know this, 349 00:20:09,382 --> 00:20:10,905 this film has singing and dancing. 350 00:20:10,948 --> 00:20:13,168 Did you bring anything to sing for us? 351 00:20:13,212 --> 00:20:13,995 - No. 352 00:20:15,039 --> 00:20:16,258 - No. 353 00:20:16,302 --> 00:20:18,869 Well, could you just sing scales for us then? 354 00:20:18,913 --> 00:20:19,696 - No. 355 00:20:20,784 --> 00:20:21,698 Yeah, sure. 356 00:20:23,004 --> 00:20:24,484 - Okay, Dick? 357 00:20:24,527 --> 00:20:27,051 [piano music] 358 00:20:27,965 --> 00:20:30,229 ♪ Scale 359 00:20:33,144 --> 00:20:36,235 ♪ Scale 360 00:20:38,106 --> 00:20:40,674 ♪ Scale 361 00:20:40,717 --> 00:20:42,023 - Thank you, thank you. 362 00:20:42,066 --> 00:20:43,285 Thank you, Miss Full. 363 00:20:43,329 --> 00:20:45,896 Well, we'll be in touch, okay? 364 00:20:45,940 --> 00:20:47,898 - Thank you, bye now. 365 00:20:47,942 --> 00:20:48,725 - Bye. 366 00:20:51,206 --> 00:20:52,599 Her orgasm wasn't too bad. 367 00:20:52,642 --> 00:20:53,817 - Are you kidding? 368 00:20:53,861 --> 00:20:55,602 That was the worst orgasm I have ever seen. 369 00:20:55,645 --> 00:20:56,516 - All right, all right. 370 00:20:56,559 --> 00:20:58,648 Let's get on with it then, okay? 371 00:20:58,692 --> 00:20:59,432 ♪ Scale 372 00:20:59,475 --> 00:21:00,998 - Let's get on with it. 373 00:21:01,042 --> 00:21:03,566 ♪ Scale 374 00:21:03,610 --> 00:21:05,481 Juanita Juanita. 375 00:21:05,525 --> 00:21:08,179 - Hey all you wonderful people. 376 00:21:08,223 --> 00:21:10,007 How are you, today? 377 00:21:10,051 --> 00:21:11,531 - Yeah, just fine, fine. 378 00:21:11,574 --> 00:21:12,532 How are you? 379 00:21:12,575 --> 00:21:14,011 - Ready to roll. 380 00:21:15,056 --> 00:21:16,927 - [Harry] Well, what can you do? 381 00:21:16,971 --> 00:21:18,886 - I do a lot of things. 382 00:21:20,104 --> 00:21:22,281 - Well, can you sing for us? 383 00:21:23,282 --> 00:21:26,023 - I would not only like to sing for you, 384 00:21:26,067 --> 00:21:27,982 I like to sing for you. 385 00:21:32,943 --> 00:21:35,772 Are you ready Mister Piano muchacho. 386 00:21:39,559 --> 00:21:40,951 Bueno bueno bueno. 387 00:21:43,389 --> 00:21:47,393 ♪ La cucaracha, la cucaracha 388 00:21:47,436 --> 00:21:50,396 [singing in foreign language] 389 00:21:50,439 --> 00:21:54,138 ♪ La cucaracha, la cucaracha 390 00:21:55,052 --> 00:21:58,969 [singing in foreign language] 391 00:22:02,190 --> 00:22:04,758 - Thank you, thank you very much. 392 00:22:04,801 --> 00:22:06,020 Just a minute. 393 00:22:13,375 --> 00:22:15,290 I'm happy to inform you, Miss Juanita, 394 00:22:15,334 --> 00:22:18,293 that you will have a part in the film. 395 00:22:18,337 --> 00:22:21,122 - I have a part, in the film? 396 00:22:22,123 --> 00:22:24,908 I'm so happy, I'm jumping for joy. 397 00:22:27,781 --> 00:22:30,392 ♪ But touch me 398 00:22:30,436 --> 00:22:33,569 ♪ I'm you 399 00:22:40,446 --> 00:22:42,491 - Very good, very good. 400 00:22:42,535 --> 00:22:44,754 I think we'll be able to work something out. 401 00:22:44,798 --> 00:22:45,973 - [George] Hey, far out. 402 00:22:46,016 --> 00:22:47,975 - Hey, far out, okay, thank you. 403 00:22:49,019 --> 00:22:49,890 Thank you. 404 00:22:49,933 --> 00:22:51,674 Now remember, please remember 405 00:22:51,718 --> 00:22:55,069 to call me at George Brenner, 223-5486. 406 00:22:56,026 --> 00:23:00,553 And please remember to call, even if I don't get the part. 407 00:23:00,596 --> 00:23:03,556 ♪ So touch me 408 00:23:03,599 --> 00:23:06,776 ♪ I'm you 409 00:23:09,997 --> 00:23:12,695 [Rosie cackling] 410 00:23:14,088 --> 00:23:16,482 [piano music] 411 00:23:16,525 --> 00:23:17,787 ♪ I wanna fuck I wanna suck 412 00:23:17,831 --> 00:23:19,485 ♪ But you're a schmuck I'm outta luck ♪ 413 00:23:19,528 --> 00:23:21,008 ♪ You can't suck or drive a truck ♪ 414 00:23:21,051 --> 00:23:23,532 ♪ Or pass the buck or eat a duck it's nip and tuck ♪ 415 00:23:23,576 --> 00:23:27,057 ♪ All the way 416 00:23:27,101 --> 00:23:29,973 ♪ So I think the only thing to do ♪ 417 00:23:30,017 --> 00:23:32,411 ♪ Is turn gay 418 00:23:36,240 --> 00:23:37,546 - [Harry] Next. 419 00:23:38,634 --> 00:23:41,028 What have you done, Miss Jones? 420 00:23:41,071 --> 00:23:43,378 - Well, not too much. 421 00:23:43,422 --> 00:23:45,424 I just got out here from Indiana. 422 00:23:46,729 --> 00:23:49,863 - Well, do you know what kind of movie this is? 423 00:23:49,906 --> 00:23:52,039 - Well no, not really. 424 00:23:52,082 --> 00:23:54,302 I just want to do a movie. 425 00:23:55,825 --> 00:23:57,348 - Well, do you sing and dance? 426 00:23:57,392 --> 00:23:59,307 - [Miss Jones] Oh yes, I do. 427 00:23:59,350 --> 00:24:01,614 - Are you willing to perform in the nude? 428 00:24:03,354 --> 00:24:04,443 - Well, sure. 429 00:24:05,835 --> 00:24:08,185 As long as I don't have to take my clothes off. 430 00:24:11,101 --> 00:24:13,452 - Excuse me for a minute. 431 00:24:13,495 --> 00:24:16,150 She's perfect for the ingenue in this film. 432 00:24:16,193 --> 00:24:18,239 - What ingenue in this film? 433 00:24:18,282 --> 00:24:20,589 There is no ingenue in this film. 434 00:24:20,633 --> 00:24:22,286 - But there's going to be an ingenue in this film 435 00:24:22,330 --> 00:24:24,463 and she's perfect for it. 436 00:24:26,769 --> 00:24:29,685 Miss Jones, you have the part, if you want it. 437 00:24:29,729 --> 00:24:30,512 - I do? 438 00:24:32,732 --> 00:24:35,517 Now, Rosie will call you and give you all the details. 439 00:24:35,561 --> 00:24:36,431 Okay? 440 00:24:36,475 --> 00:24:38,999 Oh thank you, thank you so much. 441 00:24:40,000 --> 00:24:41,349 Who is next? 442 00:24:41,392 --> 00:24:43,917 - That's it, thank God. 443 00:24:43,960 --> 00:24:44,918 - Gee. 444 00:24:44,961 --> 00:24:46,310 Well I gotta get up to the office. 445 00:24:46,354 --> 00:24:49,531 Benny's bringing around his nephew, 446 00:24:50,358 --> 00:24:51,968 I'm supposed to meet him up there. 447 00:24:52,012 --> 00:24:55,450 - Boy, did you believe that nude Buck and Wings? 448 00:24:55,494 --> 00:24:59,541 What about the world's only nude one man band? 449 00:24:59,585 --> 00:25:02,979 - Wasn't as bad as the guy with the plastic extension piece. 450 00:25:03,023 --> 00:25:04,590 - I kinda liked him. 451 00:25:05,504 --> 00:25:06,940 - He could play a great game of snooker. 452 00:25:06,983 --> 00:25:08,028 - True. 453 00:25:09,856 --> 00:25:12,772 [soft piano music] 454 00:25:19,953 --> 00:25:25,045 ♪ I just got out here from Indiana ♪ 455 00:25:25,088 --> 00:25:29,789 ♪ I hit this big town today 456 00:25:29,832 --> 00:25:34,097 ♪ I came to be in the moving pictures ♪ 457 00:25:34,141 --> 00:25:38,537 ♪ At my first try what did they say ♪ 458 00:25:38,580 --> 00:25:43,063 ♪ They said yes so I guess I'm on my way ♪ 459 00:25:43,106 --> 00:25:44,543 ♪ And though I know this movie 460 00:25:44,586 --> 00:25:49,460 ♪ Is not exactly what you call class A at all ♪ 461 00:25:49,504 --> 00:25:54,030 ♪ That's not the way at all I feel ♪ 462 00:25:54,074 --> 00:25:57,556 [upbeat orchestral music] 463 00:25:59,645 --> 00:26:05,389 ♪ Everything's going, I'm moving not slowing down ♪ 464 00:26:05,433 --> 00:26:10,438 ♪ And my world is looking fine 465 00:26:10,917 --> 00:26:16,009 ♪ I found the luck that I knew I would need ♪ 466 00:26:16,052 --> 00:26:21,057 ♪ And the lights and the smiles will be mine ♪ 467 00:26:22,450 --> 00:26:27,542 ♪ Shy, unprotected, and yet I expected ♪ 468 00:26:27,586 --> 00:26:32,591 ♪ To make my own name, my own way ♪ 469 00:26:33,635 --> 00:26:38,597 ♪ Frightened and scared, but it all worked out right ♪ 470 00:26:38,640 --> 00:26:43,602 ♪ There'll be lights, there'll be smiles every day ♪ 471 00:26:48,084 --> 00:26:54,961 ♪ And they warned me this town would be ♪ 472 00:26:55,004 --> 00:27:01,924 ♪ Very hard, and full of sad, lonely nights ♪ 473 00:27:01,968 --> 00:27:05,145 ♪ But it's just the opposite 474 00:27:05,188 --> 00:27:10,367 ♪ And its bright neon calls me on ♪ 475 00:27:10,411 --> 00:27:18,680 ♪ Look at those beautiful lights ♪ 476 00:27:20,334 --> 00:27:23,554 ♪ They tell me 477 00:27:23,598 --> 00:27:28,472 ♪ Everything's fine now the world can be mine now ♪ 478 00:27:28,516 --> 00:27:33,521 ♪ My past, it's a thing of the past ♪ 479 00:27:33,956 --> 00:27:38,526 ♪ Dull, dreary days are all done for me now ♪ 480 00:27:38,569 --> 00:27:43,574 ♪ I'll have lights, I'll have smiles now at last ♪ 481 00:27:43,879 --> 00:27:46,360 ♪ There'll be smiles, there'll be lights ♪ 482 00:27:46,403 --> 00:27:48,841 ♪ There'll be beautiful nights 483 00:27:48,884 --> 00:27:53,889 ♪ There'll be beautiful sights to see ♪ 484 00:27:54,455 --> 00:27:59,112 ♪ There'll be lights, there'll be smiles ♪ 485 00:27:59,155 --> 00:28:05,161 ♪ Just for me 486 00:28:15,998 --> 00:28:18,000 - I don't know, I don't know. 487 00:28:18,044 --> 00:28:19,828 Look, all I know is he's got this nephew 488 00:28:19,872 --> 00:28:21,743 who thinks he's a director. 489 00:28:23,049 --> 00:28:26,095 I got no choice, no nephew, no money. 490 00:28:26,139 --> 00:28:28,576 He's probably some overweight, heavy breathing, 491 00:28:28,619 --> 00:28:31,274 sadomasochistic, necrophiliac, Nazi rapist. 492 00:28:31,318 --> 00:28:32,232 I mean, look at Benny, right? 493 00:28:32,275 --> 00:28:33,450 [knocking on door] 494 00:28:34,538 --> 00:28:35,975 Wait, hold on, I ordered some lunch. 495 00:28:36,018 --> 00:28:37,890 I think the guys here, come on in, 496 00:28:37,933 --> 00:28:40,544 come in, come in, come in, come in, 497 00:28:40,588 --> 00:28:41,981 put it right in here on the desk. 498 00:28:42,024 --> 00:28:44,244 I hope they put the cream in at this time. 499 00:28:44,287 --> 00:28:45,462 Where's the sandwich? 500 00:28:45,506 --> 00:28:48,074 You didn't forget the sandwich, did you? 501 00:28:48,117 --> 00:28:50,119 Where's the coffee, I don't even see the coffee. 502 00:28:50,163 --> 00:28:52,165 Look, hold on for a second. 503 00:28:52,208 --> 00:28:53,601 What kind of delivery service is this, anyway? 504 00:28:53,644 --> 00:28:55,298 You get back to that slop factory you work for 505 00:28:55,342 --> 00:28:56,996 and you tell them to bring me what I ordered. 506 00:28:57,039 --> 00:28:58,911 And hurry it up, okay? 507 00:29:02,741 --> 00:29:03,916 You wouldn't believe it, you order some lunch, 508 00:29:03,959 --> 00:29:05,874 they send some kid up here with nothing. 509 00:29:05,918 --> 00:29:07,397 I mean the kid brought nothing. 510 00:29:07,441 --> 00:29:08,224 The kid- 511 00:29:10,836 --> 00:29:12,141 Oh shit. 512 00:29:12,185 --> 00:29:15,884 Oh shit, I'll call you back later. 513 00:29:17,451 --> 00:29:18,234 Hey kid! 514 00:29:20,367 --> 00:29:22,543 Are you Benny's nephew? 515 00:29:22,586 --> 00:29:23,762 Look, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. 516 00:29:23,805 --> 00:29:25,024 I'm Harry Schechter. 517 00:29:25,067 --> 00:29:26,286 It's very nice to meet you. 518 00:29:26,329 --> 00:29:29,768 Just come on in and sit, pull up a chair. 519 00:29:34,598 --> 00:29:36,035 Look, I'm sorry I didn't know who you were. 520 00:29:36,078 --> 00:29:37,253 I was expect- 521 00:29:54,923 --> 00:29:56,403 a delivery service. 522 00:29:57,273 --> 00:29:59,580 I thought your Uncle Benny was coming with you. 523 00:29:59,623 --> 00:30:01,974 - Oh, he was, but he couldn't, 524 00:30:03,192 --> 00:30:03,932 come. 525 00:30:05,107 --> 00:30:08,154 Was something about seeing some Dolly, 526 00:30:08,197 --> 00:30:09,982 or maybe it was Hello Dolly. 527 00:30:10,025 --> 00:30:12,985 [laughing] 528 00:30:19,165 --> 00:30:20,688 He couldn't come. 529 00:30:24,387 --> 00:30:25,171 - Yeah. 530 00:30:27,390 --> 00:30:30,132 Well it's John, isn't it? 531 00:30:30,176 --> 00:30:31,699 - What is? 532 00:30:31,742 --> 00:30:33,005 - Your name? 533 00:30:33,048 --> 00:30:34,049 - It's John. 534 00:30:34,963 --> 00:30:36,878 - Wonderful. 535 00:30:36,922 --> 00:30:39,794 Now, John, as you know, 536 00:30:39,838 --> 00:30:41,317 your Uncle Benny got you this job, 537 00:30:41,361 --> 00:30:45,582 and as you know, and as I know, 538 00:30:45,626 --> 00:30:48,020 you've never directed a picture before, 539 00:30:48,063 --> 00:30:49,978 but that's okay, that's okay. 540 00:30:50,022 --> 00:30:51,588 He says you're willing to learn. 541 00:30:51,632 --> 00:30:52,894 Right? - Right. 542 00:30:54,026 --> 00:30:55,070 - Right. 543 00:30:56,855 --> 00:30:59,683 I really didn't know you were this young. 544 00:30:59,727 --> 00:31:01,033 - Oh, I just look young. 545 00:31:01,076 --> 00:31:02,295 I'm really 23. 546 00:31:03,949 --> 00:31:05,864 - 23? 547 00:31:13,045 --> 00:31:14,873 Now look, John. 548 00:31:14,916 --> 00:31:16,483 I don't know if your Uncle Benny told you 549 00:31:16,526 --> 00:31:18,833 about the kind of picture we're making. 550 00:31:18,877 --> 00:31:20,617 - He said it was a musical. 551 00:31:20,661 --> 00:31:21,705 - Yeah, well it is a musical, 552 00:31:21,749 --> 00:31:24,447 but it's not an ordinary musical, 553 00:31:25,927 --> 00:31:28,321 it's a tits and ass musical. 554 00:31:30,453 --> 00:31:31,802 - Tits and ass? 555 00:31:33,369 --> 00:31:35,415 - A pornographic musical. 556 00:31:36,982 --> 00:31:40,855 - A pornograph? [laughing] 557 00:31:45,468 --> 00:31:47,166 - Look John, 558 00:31:47,209 --> 00:31:50,038 I know you have a wealth of sexual experience, 559 00:31:50,082 --> 00:31:52,998 and a panorama of sexual knowledge, 560 00:31:53,041 --> 00:31:55,652 but to be honest on the outside, 561 00:31:58,003 --> 00:31:59,482 you look innocent, 562 00:31:59,526 --> 00:32:04,009 you know like you don't know your ass from your elbow. 563 00:32:04,052 --> 00:32:06,315 - Oh, I know I give the appearance of 564 00:32:06,359 --> 00:32:09,449 being very innocent but I really do have a wealth of 565 00:32:12,060 --> 00:32:14,976 sexual experience and a panorama of 566 00:32:17,152 --> 00:32:17,936 knowledge. 567 00:32:20,068 --> 00:32:20,895 - Fine. 568 00:32:22,636 --> 00:32:25,160 But we only have two weeks to make this picture. 569 00:32:26,509 --> 00:32:29,817 Now, tomorrow you're gonna be meeting the cast. 570 00:32:29,860 --> 00:32:31,775 Now most of them are veterans. 571 00:32:31,819 --> 00:32:33,429 - Is Chill Wills in it, Andy Devine? 572 00:32:33,473 --> 00:32:35,649 - No, no, no, John, a veterans of many porno films. 573 00:32:35,692 --> 00:32:37,172 So when you go in there tomorrow, 574 00:32:37,216 --> 00:32:40,959 you gotta act like you know what you're talking about. 575 00:32:41,002 --> 00:32:44,005 You gotta be gutsy, you gotta use filthy language. 576 00:32:44,049 --> 00:32:45,920 Otherwise they're gonna walk all over you. 577 00:32:47,356 --> 00:32:50,011 Now, this picture has everything, John, we got your, 578 00:32:50,055 --> 00:32:54,233 tits, ass, fucking, fondling, oral sex. 579 00:32:59,151 --> 00:33:01,936 You don't have anything against oral sex, do you, John? 580 00:33:02,937 --> 00:33:06,071 - No, I like to talk about sex as much as the next fellow. 581 00:33:09,074 --> 00:33:11,424 - Oh boy, are we in trouble. 582 00:33:11,467 --> 00:33:12,555 - Why? 583 00:33:12,599 --> 00:33:15,689 - Listen, like I said, 584 00:33:15,732 --> 00:33:18,605 we both know you're a dean on sexual matters, 585 00:33:18,648 --> 00:33:20,259 but when you go in there tomorrow, 586 00:33:20,302 --> 00:33:22,391 you gotta act like you know what you're doing. 587 00:33:22,435 --> 00:33:25,699 You gotta pretend to know how to make a picture, huh? 588 00:33:25,742 --> 00:33:28,136 You gotta, you gotta be strong. 589 00:33:28,180 --> 00:33:31,966 You gotta let them know who's boss. 590 00:33:32,010 --> 00:33:33,011 Now go home, 591 00:33:34,838 --> 00:33:36,710 go home, read, 592 00:33:38,973 --> 00:33:39,974 do research. 593 00:33:41,106 --> 00:33:42,672 See Deep Throat, I don't know. 594 00:33:42,716 --> 00:33:44,935 - Deep what? - Deep Throat. 595 00:33:46,111 --> 00:33:46,894 Look. 596 00:33:46,937 --> 00:33:48,330 - Where is that playing? 597 00:33:48,374 --> 00:33:50,071 - I know we're gonna be pals, John. 598 00:33:50,115 --> 00:33:53,074 And it's just gonna be great. 599 00:33:53,118 --> 00:33:55,990 Now I want you to call me Harry. 600 00:33:57,252 --> 00:33:58,036 - Harry. 601 00:34:00,125 --> 00:34:03,302 - You can call me Mister Schechter. 602 00:34:03,345 --> 00:34:04,999 All right, now I want you to be here tomorrow, 603 00:34:05,043 --> 00:34:08,437 one o'clock, Stage 8, check the production, okay? 604 00:34:08,481 --> 00:34:09,786 - Schechner. 605 00:34:09,830 --> 00:34:10,831 - Schechter. 606 00:34:12,311 --> 00:34:13,399 Schechter. 607 00:34:14,052 --> 00:34:15,053 Schechter. 608 00:34:16,315 --> 00:34:17,664 - Where's that? 609 00:34:18,795 --> 00:34:21,450 It's here, John, it's right here. 610 00:34:22,582 --> 00:34:23,757 All right now, great. 611 00:34:23,800 --> 00:34:26,151 Now it was really nice meeting you, John, 612 00:34:26,194 --> 00:34:28,066 and I couldn't be happier. 613 00:34:28,109 --> 00:34:30,459 It's gonna be great, it's gonna be just great. 614 00:34:30,503 --> 00:34:31,286 - Great. 615 00:34:33,027 --> 00:34:34,028 - Okay? 616 00:34:34,072 --> 00:34:35,464 - Okay, thanks, Mister Schechner. 617 00:34:35,508 --> 00:34:36,509 - Schechter. 618 00:34:38,076 --> 00:34:39,033 Goodbye, John. 619 00:34:40,817 --> 00:34:42,993 [chuckling] 620 00:34:44,038 --> 00:34:46,649 [piano music] 621 00:34:53,047 --> 00:34:55,005 - Yeah, I worked for him once before. 622 00:34:55,049 --> 00:34:57,486 Kung Fu Sex Slaves. 623 00:34:57,530 --> 00:34:59,009 - Oh yeah. 624 00:34:59,053 --> 00:35:00,402 You were the one that did it going up the ladder. 625 00:35:00,446 --> 00:35:01,447 - Yeah. 626 00:35:01,490 --> 00:35:03,013 - You were great. 627 00:35:03,057 --> 00:35:04,624 - Oh, thank you. 628 00:35:04,667 --> 00:35:07,844 ♪ La cucaracha, la cucaracha 629 00:35:07,888 --> 00:35:10,151 [singing in foreign language] 630 00:35:10,195 --> 00:35:13,589 ♪ La cucaracha, la cucaracha 631 00:35:13,633 --> 00:35:16,766 - Hi there, my name is George, George Brenner. 632 00:35:16,810 --> 00:35:17,550 What's yours? 633 00:35:17,593 --> 00:35:18,812 - Juanita. 634 00:35:18,855 --> 00:35:21,902 - Juanita, that's a lovely name. 635 00:35:21,945 --> 00:35:24,557 - Thank you very much. 636 00:35:24,600 --> 00:35:26,820 [ringing] 637 00:35:28,387 --> 00:35:32,130 - You got something else you wanted to say? 638 00:35:33,435 --> 00:35:35,611 - No, I think that's about it. 639 00:35:36,699 --> 00:35:38,440 ♪ Every time 640 00:35:38,484 --> 00:35:40,094 Oh, bullshit. 641 00:35:43,532 --> 00:35:45,012 - You wouldn't believe it. 642 00:35:45,055 --> 00:35:47,971 He looks like he just got out of high school, and dumb. 643 00:35:48,015 --> 00:35:49,712 - A real talent, huh? 644 00:35:50,931 --> 00:35:52,802 - Look at these people. 645 00:35:57,067 --> 00:35:59,592 Oh, we're gonna need a miracle. 646 00:35:59,635 --> 00:36:01,681 - Hello, Mister Schechter. 647 00:36:01,724 --> 00:36:03,509 Mary La Rue, remember? 648 00:36:04,814 --> 00:36:08,253 I want to thank you for casting me in your picture. 649 00:36:08,296 --> 00:36:10,516 - Well, you're very talented, Miss La Rue. 650 00:36:12,126 --> 00:36:13,171 Excuse me. 651 00:36:15,303 --> 00:36:16,870 - Oh, he's sweet. 652 00:36:17,740 --> 00:36:19,307 He's my kind of man. 653 00:36:20,178 --> 00:36:23,093 I think that I'm probably his kind of woman, too. 654 00:36:23,137 --> 00:36:23,877 - Really? 655 00:36:25,487 --> 00:36:30,275 - Listen honey, since I am one of the leads in this picture, 656 00:36:30,318 --> 00:36:31,928 well, in my last picture, 657 00:36:31,972 --> 00:36:34,670 they sort of gave me my own little dressing room, 658 00:36:34,714 --> 00:36:38,065 so I didn't have to be around all the people. 659 00:36:38,108 --> 00:36:40,067 Do you think we could arrange that? 660 00:36:40,894 --> 00:36:44,071 - Well honey, we do have a dressing room, 661 00:36:44,114 --> 00:36:46,769 but it's not real close to the set. 662 00:36:46,813 --> 00:36:48,031 - Oh, that's quite all right. 663 00:36:48,075 --> 00:36:49,250 Where exactly is it? 664 00:36:49,294 --> 00:36:50,164 - New York. 665 00:36:51,731 --> 00:36:52,906 - Now, do you have all the information? 666 00:36:52,949 --> 00:36:53,950 - Yeah. 667 00:36:53,994 --> 00:36:55,561 - Okay, you got this stuff here? 668 00:36:55,604 --> 00:36:56,605 All right, now it's great 669 00:36:56,649 --> 00:36:58,085 to have you on the picture, Eunice. 670 00:36:58,128 --> 00:37:00,261 - You know I love working with you, Mister Schechter. 671 00:37:00,305 --> 00:37:02,394 - Look, how have you been? 672 00:37:02,437 --> 00:37:04,047 - Well, aside for my emotional, social, 673 00:37:04,091 --> 00:37:07,355 and sexual life, I've been great, just great. 674 00:37:07,399 --> 00:37:09,052 - Same old Eunice. 675 00:37:09,096 --> 00:37:10,576 Get this one too. 676 00:37:10,619 --> 00:37:13,361 All right, now the director should be here any minute. 677 00:37:13,405 --> 00:37:15,058 - Oh, who is it this time? 678 00:37:15,102 --> 00:37:16,364 - John Smithee. 679 00:37:17,583 --> 00:37:19,541 - John Smithee? 680 00:37:48,353 --> 00:37:49,528 - Oh shit! 681 00:37:53,662 --> 00:37:55,751 - Has he said, oh shit, yet? 682 00:37:55,795 --> 00:37:57,275 - All right, everyone sit down. 683 00:37:57,318 --> 00:37:59,015 Just sit down. 684 00:37:59,059 --> 00:38:00,452 What the hell is this? 685 00:38:00,495 --> 00:38:01,888 - Do you think it's too much? 686 00:38:01,931 --> 00:38:04,064 I mean, I saw a picture in a film book on directors. 687 00:38:04,107 --> 00:38:05,457 Nifty, isn't it? 688 00:38:05,500 --> 00:38:07,110 - Nifty, oh yeah, it's great, it's great, 689 00:38:07,154 --> 00:38:09,983 only we're not doing The Blue Angel, John. 690 00:38:11,158 --> 00:38:12,377 - You don't like it. 691 00:38:12,420 --> 00:38:13,334 You hate it. 692 00:38:14,335 --> 00:38:15,249 You think I look like an idiot. 693 00:38:15,293 --> 00:38:17,077 - Look, don't get crazy, John. 694 00:38:17,120 --> 00:38:19,775 I think that if you just took off 695 00:38:20,559 --> 00:38:21,690 the beret and 696 00:38:22,996 --> 00:38:25,433 the scarf and the jodhpurs, 697 00:38:25,477 --> 00:38:27,479 look, I don't know, just don't lose your confidence. 698 00:38:27,522 --> 00:38:30,133 Just get in there and talk to 'em, like we said yesterday. 699 00:38:30,177 --> 00:38:30,960 Okay? 700 00:38:32,005 --> 00:38:34,094 - I'll try Mister Schechner. 701 00:38:34,137 --> 00:38:35,008 - It's Schechter. 702 00:38:35,051 --> 00:38:36,052 - Schechter. 703 00:38:39,404 --> 00:38:40,100 - Okay. 704 00:38:41,188 --> 00:38:42,755 First, I'd like to welcome you all 705 00:38:42,798 --> 00:38:46,933 and say how happy I am to have you in the picture. 706 00:38:46,976 --> 00:38:49,501 You all know what kind of a movie we're making. 707 00:38:49,544 --> 00:38:52,068 And we have hardly any time at all to shoot this picture, 708 00:38:52,112 --> 00:38:56,595 but if we all work together, I know we can pull it off. 709 00:38:58,205 --> 00:38:58,988 We, 710 00:39:01,948 --> 00:39:04,385 that is to say are very fortunate 711 00:39:04,429 --> 00:39:06,605 to have a very talented director. 712 00:39:06,648 --> 00:39:09,390 And I know he wants to say a few words. 713 00:39:09,434 --> 00:39:13,568 I'd like you all to meet John Smithee. 714 00:39:14,264 --> 00:39:17,093 [group applauding] 715 00:39:33,109 --> 00:39:33,893 Talk. 716 00:39:43,293 --> 00:39:44,077 - Hello. 717 00:39:45,948 --> 00:39:47,080 My name is J... 718 00:39:54,000 --> 00:39:55,871 John Smithee, 719 00:39:56,611 --> 00:39:59,832 and I will be directing this film. 720 00:40:00,702 --> 00:40:01,921 We will, of course shoot it 721 00:40:01,964 --> 00:40:05,533 at the ratio of 1.85 to 1, using a camera. 722 00:40:09,102 --> 00:40:09,885 Fuck. 723 00:40:11,452 --> 00:40:14,194 It will of course be montages, flash cuts, fade outs, 724 00:40:14,237 --> 00:40:15,848 add-ins, an occasional pan, 725 00:40:15,891 --> 00:40:18,416 always of course, using the camera. 726 00:40:19,765 --> 00:40:21,506 Eisenstein and I work very much the same way, 727 00:40:21,549 --> 00:40:22,637 and he, of course, continues 728 00:40:22,681 --> 00:40:25,553 to make great moneymaking pictures. 729 00:40:26,554 --> 00:40:30,297 - Oh, please God, why me? 730 00:40:30,340 --> 00:40:32,081 - Now, as Mister Sheckler said, 731 00:40:32,125 --> 00:40:33,735 we don't have a lot of time. 732 00:40:33,779 --> 00:40:36,608 So I will, of course expect hard work, cooperation, 733 00:40:36,651 --> 00:40:40,525 diligence, photography, sound, and color. 734 00:40:40,568 --> 00:40:43,397 Shit, we can make a fucking good bitch of a bastard movie, 735 00:40:43,441 --> 00:40:45,486 if we all pull together and work 736 00:40:45,530 --> 00:40:48,315 as a whore-loving cunt penis team. 737 00:40:52,014 --> 00:40:53,059 Thank you. 738 00:41:02,285 --> 00:41:04,679 [laughing] 739 00:41:06,812 --> 00:41:08,074 - All right, all right, everyone. 740 00:41:08,117 --> 00:41:10,119 Take five, take five, 741 00:41:10,163 --> 00:41:12,470 and then we'll get to work. 742 00:41:14,515 --> 00:41:15,864 - How was I? 743 00:41:15,908 --> 00:41:18,476 - You were wonderful John, you were just wonderful. 744 00:41:18,519 --> 00:41:19,477 - Marvelous. 745 00:41:20,347 --> 00:41:21,087 - I was? 746 00:41:21,130 --> 00:41:22,349 - Oh, yes yes. 747 00:41:29,748 --> 00:41:31,967 [tapping] 748 00:41:42,587 --> 00:41:46,068 - Oh, okay, kids, gather around here, all right? 749 00:41:46,112 --> 00:41:49,202 This is Dick Davis, our composer. 750 00:41:49,245 --> 00:41:53,032 And he's gonna be teaching you the songs as he writes them. 751 00:41:53,075 --> 00:41:54,163 Dick? 752 00:41:54,207 --> 00:41:56,035 - I just wrote this five minutes ago, 753 00:41:56,078 --> 00:42:00,039 it's gonna be a big production number, the title song. 754 00:42:00,082 --> 00:42:02,781 So let's learn it, one, two, three, four. 755 00:42:02,824 --> 00:42:05,305 ♪ Come, come now 756 00:42:05,348 --> 00:42:08,961 ♪ The boys are late, late, late ♪ 757 00:42:09,004 --> 00:42:12,921 ♪ Working on you far ahead, but now ♪ 758 00:42:12,965 --> 00:42:14,880 ♪ And I'm telling you 759 00:42:14,923 --> 00:42:15,968 Shit. 760 00:42:17,447 --> 00:42:19,058 ♪ And I'm telling you dear, that it better be now ♪ 761 00:42:19,101 --> 00:42:23,018 ♪ Or I won't be able to stop so come, come now ♪ 762 00:42:23,062 --> 00:42:24,063 Got it gang? 763 00:42:30,373 --> 00:42:33,986 [singing in the distance] 764 00:42:59,664 --> 00:43:01,491 - Ready, and. 765 00:43:16,724 --> 00:43:18,204 - How do you do it? 766 00:43:18,987 --> 00:43:21,468 How do you attract all of those men? 767 00:43:21,511 --> 00:43:22,904 I sure wish I could do it. 768 00:43:22,948 --> 00:43:24,384 - Well, honey, 769 00:43:24,427 --> 00:43:27,126 some of us were born with it and some of you weren't. 770 00:43:28,083 --> 00:43:29,824 You're a great script girl. 771 00:43:29,868 --> 00:43:31,478 Do what you do best. 772 00:43:35,351 --> 00:43:36,918 - Hi baby. 773 00:43:36,962 --> 00:43:38,050 How you doing? 774 00:43:38,093 --> 00:43:39,617 That's really hard work, huh? 775 00:43:39,660 --> 00:43:40,922 Glad we got a break. 776 00:43:40,966 --> 00:43:42,968 You know, I don't think we've been introduced. 777 00:43:43,011 --> 00:43:43,751 My name is. 778 00:43:43,795 --> 00:43:44,926 - George Brenner, I know. 779 00:43:44,970 --> 00:43:46,754 I heard you telling everybody else. 780 00:43:46,798 --> 00:43:48,016 - Oh. 781 00:43:48,060 --> 00:43:51,280 ♪ I'm not the bomb, I'm not a cripple ♪ 782 00:43:51,324 --> 00:43:56,329 ♪ So tell me why won't you let me hold your nipple ♪ 783 00:43:57,635 --> 00:43:59,462 - No, wait a minute, wait a minute. 784 00:43:59,506 --> 00:44:00,289 Action. 785 00:44:08,907 --> 00:44:11,083 - Is this where I give head? 786 00:44:11,126 --> 00:44:11,910 - Head? 787 00:44:13,999 --> 00:44:15,000 What's head? 788 00:44:20,614 --> 00:44:21,876 - Can you believe it? 789 00:44:21,920 --> 00:44:24,226 And we start tomorrow, there's so much to do. 790 00:44:24,270 --> 00:44:27,839 - Well, that director you hired isn't exactly Mister Speed. 791 00:44:27,882 --> 00:44:29,841 - I didn't hire him, he was a gift. 792 00:44:29,884 --> 00:44:31,973 Listen, I had no choice. 793 00:44:32,017 --> 00:44:33,932 I mean, we got to finish this picture on time. 794 00:44:33,975 --> 00:44:36,412 That's all there is to it, no matter what. 795 00:44:36,456 --> 00:44:38,676 Well, I gotta be off. 796 00:44:38,719 --> 00:44:40,982 I got to have dinner with that Mary La Rue tonight. 797 00:44:41,026 --> 00:44:41,940 It's important, she said. 798 00:44:41,983 --> 00:44:44,072 - Well, give her my best. 799 00:44:46,771 --> 00:44:48,033 - I get the feeling you're not 800 00:44:48,076 --> 00:44:50,165 terrifically fond of Miss La Rue. 801 00:44:50,209 --> 00:44:52,951 - Are you kidding? She's terrific. 802 00:44:52,994 --> 00:44:55,997 She has all the qualities I admire most in a woman. 803 00:44:56,041 --> 00:44:58,913 She's opportunistic, pushy, 804 00:44:58,957 --> 00:45:01,176 self-centered and a bitch. 805 00:45:01,220 --> 00:45:02,874 Enjoy Harry. 806 00:45:02,917 --> 00:45:04,049 - Thanks a lot. 807 00:45:04,092 --> 00:45:05,441 Look, stick around and see if the guys 808 00:45:05,485 --> 00:45:07,487 finish up on time, okay? 809 00:45:08,357 --> 00:45:09,141 See ya. 810 00:45:10,882 --> 00:45:12,100 - I'll just stick around 811 00:45:12,144 --> 00:45:15,713 and see that these guys finish up on time. 812 00:45:16,975 --> 00:45:19,760 Okay guys, I'm just gonna stick around 813 00:45:19,804 --> 00:45:23,677 and see that you all finish up on time. 814 00:45:23,721 --> 00:45:27,072 [upbeat orchestral music] 815 00:45:28,203 --> 00:45:29,422 - Quiet, quiet. 816 00:45:30,466 --> 00:45:32,599 Quiet down, let's have a rehearsal. 817 00:45:32,642 --> 00:45:33,426 Places. 818 00:45:40,868 --> 00:45:42,609 - Mister Smithee? 819 00:45:42,652 --> 00:45:43,871 In this scene, you want me to do 820 00:45:43,915 --> 00:45:46,874 just a regular ordinary orgasm, right? 821 00:46:03,499 --> 00:46:05,371 - I think in the scene, 822 00:46:09,984 --> 00:46:12,378 I think in this number, you, 823 00:46:14,728 --> 00:46:16,948 let me just line up the shot. 824 00:46:19,124 --> 00:46:22,562 - They want one on the set tomorrow, oh. 825 00:46:27,219 --> 00:46:28,568 - Oh shit. 826 00:46:34,008 --> 00:46:35,705 Listen, John? 827 00:46:35,749 --> 00:46:37,229 Could you do us a big favor? 828 00:46:37,272 --> 00:46:39,492 - Yes, yes, yes, Mister Schechter, what? 829 00:46:39,535 --> 00:46:41,886 - Could you run out and get us some donuts? 830 00:46:41,929 --> 00:46:44,932 You know, we could really use some energy food. 831 00:46:44,976 --> 00:46:45,803 - Donuts? 832 00:46:46,847 --> 00:46:48,109 What about the rehearsal? 833 00:46:48,153 --> 00:46:49,719 What about the shot? 834 00:46:49,763 --> 00:46:51,025 - We'll just hold everything just the way it is 835 00:46:51,069 --> 00:46:52,722 till you get back. 836 00:46:54,028 --> 00:46:55,073 - You're sure? 837 00:46:55,116 --> 00:46:58,816 - Of course, you just take your time. 838 00:46:58,859 --> 00:47:02,254 John, I think you should get one donut of every kind, 839 00:47:02,297 --> 00:47:03,821 you know, just in case. 840 00:47:03,864 --> 00:47:05,213 And if they're out, 841 00:47:05,257 --> 00:47:08,782 I think you'd better go to another store, okay? 842 00:47:08,826 --> 00:47:10,958 - Okay. - All right. 843 00:47:11,002 --> 00:47:11,829 John. 844 00:47:16,572 --> 00:47:20,141 [light instrumental music] 845 00:47:32,023 --> 00:47:33,807 All right, everyone, 846 00:47:33,851 --> 00:47:35,853 here's the way we're gonna do it, place. 847 00:47:35,896 --> 00:47:38,072 - [Man] Orgasm, take one. 848 00:47:38,116 --> 00:47:40,335 [moaning] 849 00:47:42,860 --> 00:47:45,210 [piano music] 850 00:47:50,258 --> 00:47:52,043 ♪ Orgasm's 851 00:47:52,086 --> 00:47:58,005 ♪ A short spasm of love, sweet love ♪ 852 00:47:58,049 --> 00:47:59,833 ♪ Orgasm 853 00:47:59,877 --> 00:48:01,661 ♪ Sure has 'em 854 00:48:01,704 --> 00:48:05,665 ♪ Doin' it nicely, doin' it nightly ♪ 855 00:48:05,708 --> 00:48:09,060 ♪ Doin' it nicely nightly 856 00:48:14,543 --> 00:48:17,590 - [Man] Lesbian Butch Dyke, take one. 857 00:48:19,374 --> 00:48:21,899 - No, I don't smoke. 858 00:48:32,344 --> 00:48:33,954 No, I don't drink. 859 00:48:37,305 --> 00:48:38,916 - Just relax, honey. 860 00:48:40,830 --> 00:48:44,486 All I want to do is touch you. 861 00:48:46,271 --> 00:48:47,141 Caress you. 862 00:48:49,187 --> 00:48:49,970 Kiss you. 863 00:48:54,627 --> 00:48:57,108 Do dirty things to your body. 864 00:48:59,414 --> 00:49:03,157 Just think of me as a friend. 865 00:49:04,289 --> 00:49:05,855 - Are you a homo? 866 00:49:07,727 --> 00:49:09,511 - You bet your nipple. 867 00:49:10,338 --> 00:49:13,646 [dramatic piano music] 868 00:49:16,040 --> 00:49:18,129 ♪ Oh, lesbian, butch, dyke 869 00:49:18,172 --> 00:49:20,044 ♪ You can call it what you like ♪ 870 00:49:20,087 --> 00:49:24,352 ♪ But it's what I am and what I'll always be ♪ 871 00:49:24,396 --> 00:49:26,441 ♪ Oh, lesbian, butch, dyke 872 00:49:26,485 --> 00:49:28,443 ♪ And that's why they call me Mike ♪ 873 00:49:28,487 --> 00:49:32,447 ♪ And not Jane or Susan or Penelope ♪ 874 00:49:32,491 --> 00:49:37,017 ♪ I have a leaning towards a meaningful new tete a tete ♪ 875 00:49:37,061 --> 00:49:39,541 ♪ But if there's a man in the vicinity ♪ 876 00:49:39,585 --> 00:49:43,545 ♪ And if he infers he'd like to get in it he ♪ 877 00:49:43,589 --> 00:49:47,201 ♪ Not only won't, the only thing he'll get ♪ 878 00:49:47,245 --> 00:49:49,725 ♪ is a lesbian, butch, dyke 879 00:49:49,769 --> 00:49:51,466 ♪ You can call it what you like ♪ 880 00:49:51,510 --> 00:49:53,947 ♪ But it's what I am 881 00:49:53,991 --> 00:49:58,996 ♪ It's what I am and what I'll always be ♪ 882 00:50:02,303 --> 00:50:03,652 ♪ Ole 883 00:50:07,874 --> 00:50:09,963 - Done some great work, John. 884 00:50:10,007 --> 00:50:12,618 - Oh, thank you, Mister Schechter. 885 00:50:12,661 --> 00:50:14,054 I really don't remember doing all of it, 886 00:50:14,098 --> 00:50:16,665 but I guess that can happen during creative fervor, 887 00:50:16,709 --> 00:50:17,840 huh, Mister Schechter? 888 00:50:17,884 --> 00:50:19,059 - It's all yours, John. 889 00:50:19,103 --> 00:50:21,018 You just keep up the good work. 890 00:50:21,061 --> 00:50:22,367 - Oh, I'll try Mister Schechter. 891 00:50:22,410 --> 00:50:23,890 - That's my boy. 892 00:50:23,933 --> 00:50:25,848 Now you better go get ready for tomorrow's work, okay? 893 00:50:25,892 --> 00:50:27,067 - Right. Okay. 894 00:50:37,730 --> 00:50:38,948 - What were you going to do for dinner? 895 00:50:38,992 --> 00:50:40,559 - I was gonna eat. 896 00:50:40,602 --> 00:50:41,603 - Would you like to go out? 897 00:50:41,647 --> 00:50:43,562 - Sure, what time? 898 00:50:43,605 --> 00:50:45,433 - Pick you up at seven. 899 00:50:45,477 --> 00:50:46,695 - It is seven. 900 00:50:48,915 --> 00:50:50,090 - Then I'm here. 901 00:50:50,134 --> 00:50:51,700 You ready? - Yeah. 902 00:50:51,744 --> 00:50:53,050 Sorry I took so long. 903 00:50:53,093 --> 00:50:54,051 - It's okay. 904 00:50:58,055 --> 00:51:00,840 [crowd murmuring] 905 00:51:15,507 --> 00:51:16,638 - Well, yes. 906 00:51:16,682 --> 00:51:19,815 You know, I believe in a fluid camera, 907 00:51:19,859 --> 00:51:22,035 you know a Minellian camera. 908 00:51:23,776 --> 00:51:25,212 - Who gives a shit? 909 00:51:29,999 --> 00:51:33,655 - You know, I believe in a, you know, a fluid camera, 910 00:51:33,699 --> 00:51:35,744 a Minellian camera. 911 00:51:35,788 --> 00:51:37,094 - Oh, me too. 912 00:51:39,966 --> 00:51:41,924 - Oh Harry please. 913 00:51:41,968 --> 00:51:42,708 - Look, you got a finger number, 914 00:51:42,751 --> 00:51:44,188 you got to have fingers. 915 00:51:44,231 --> 00:51:46,103 - Oh please I beg of you Harry, cut the finger number. 916 00:51:46,146 --> 00:51:47,887 Look at this, look, you can't. 917 00:51:47,930 --> 00:51:49,584 - Look at this. 918 00:51:49,628 --> 00:51:51,195 Look at this. 919 00:51:51,238 --> 00:51:53,110 They're all standing around eating donuts. 920 00:51:53,153 --> 00:51:54,894 - Now, now, Harry, you promised me 921 00:51:54,937 --> 00:51:56,635 you weren't going to get excited. 922 00:51:56,678 --> 00:51:57,940 - Yeah, you're right, It's only nine o'clock. 923 00:51:57,984 --> 00:51:59,159 That means they've only been standing around 924 00:51:59,203 --> 00:52:00,987 eating donuts for two hours. 925 00:52:01,030 --> 00:52:02,075 John! 926 00:52:04,208 --> 00:52:05,861 - I'm coming, I'm coming. 927 00:52:05,905 --> 00:52:06,906 I'll be right. 928 00:52:06,949 --> 00:52:09,822 Oh wait, wait, let me just get you. 929 00:52:11,258 --> 00:52:12,259 - Come here. 930 00:52:14,783 --> 00:52:16,524 - Yes, Mister Schechner yes, 931 00:52:16,568 --> 00:52:18,570 good morning, hello, how are you? 932 00:52:18,613 --> 00:52:19,527 Donut? 933 00:52:19,571 --> 00:52:20,746 - I don't think so, John. 934 00:52:20,789 --> 00:52:22,095 - Really? 935 00:52:22,139 --> 00:52:23,444 I mean, I got them on my way in this morning, 936 00:52:23,488 --> 00:52:26,099 so I wouldn't have to leave the, you know, the- 937 00:52:26,143 --> 00:52:27,622 - Set? 938 00:52:27,666 --> 00:52:29,058 - Set, yes, sorry, are you sure you wouldn't like one? 939 00:52:29,102 --> 00:52:30,016 I mean, because I've got all kinds here. 940 00:52:30,059 --> 00:52:32,192 I got glazed, glazed, 941 00:52:32,236 --> 00:52:34,847 I must've got a glazed box. 942 00:52:34,890 --> 00:52:36,762 - John, would you put them down now? 943 00:52:36,805 --> 00:52:38,938 I think that we're supposed to be doing a number here, 944 00:52:38,981 --> 00:52:39,808 don't you think? 945 00:52:39,852 --> 00:52:41,245 Why isn't anything going on? 946 00:52:41,288 --> 00:52:42,855 I'm talking, John, what are you doing? 947 00:52:42,898 --> 00:52:45,074 - I'm trying to, I can't find any place to put the donuts. 948 00:52:45,118 --> 00:52:46,902 - Just drop them, John. 949 00:52:46,946 --> 00:52:48,904 Just drop, look, just drop them on the floor. 950 00:52:48,948 --> 00:52:51,298 Drop them on the floor, John. 951 00:52:51,342 --> 00:52:53,082 - They'll get dirty. 952 00:52:53,126 --> 00:52:55,041 - I'll handle this. 953 00:52:55,084 --> 00:52:56,956 Give me the donuts, John. 954 00:52:58,131 --> 00:52:59,567 - I thought you didn't want any? 955 00:53:01,917 --> 00:53:05,051 - I think what Harry is trying to say here, 956 00:53:05,094 --> 00:53:06,835 is that you'd better start 957 00:53:06,879 --> 00:53:09,229 rehearsing everyone for the number. 958 00:53:09,273 --> 00:53:10,883 I think that's what Harry's trying to say. 959 00:53:10,926 --> 00:53:13,625 Only Harry's having a seizure at the moment. 960 00:53:13,668 --> 00:53:14,887 - Right. 961 00:53:14,930 --> 00:53:16,932 Then what I'll do is I'll start rehearsing 962 00:53:16,976 --> 00:53:19,413 and I'll get the number, right. 963 00:53:20,240 --> 00:53:21,415 - All right, let's get this rehearsal, 964 00:53:21,459 --> 00:53:22,851 all right, now this is the dildo number. 965 00:53:22,895 --> 00:53:24,592 Every dildo works, all right? 966 00:53:24,636 --> 00:53:25,985 - Okay, okay, everybody. 967 00:53:26,028 --> 00:53:27,291 Dildos. 968 00:53:27,334 --> 00:53:28,466 Mary, let's go. 969 00:53:28,509 --> 00:53:30,816 - It's Miss La Rue to you, bozo. 970 00:53:31,860 --> 00:53:32,861 Hello Harry. 971 00:53:43,611 --> 00:53:45,570 - I got dibs on the crane for rehearsal. 972 00:53:46,614 --> 00:53:48,225 - Dibs on the crane? 973 00:53:51,053 --> 00:53:52,141 - How's it going, Harry. 974 00:53:52,185 --> 00:53:53,839 - Oh, great, great. 975 00:53:53,882 --> 00:53:56,015 - Hey listen, can I see you for a minute? 976 00:53:56,058 --> 00:53:57,146 - Yeah, what's up? 977 00:53:58,322 --> 00:54:00,367 - Benny is very upset about the script. 978 00:54:00,411 --> 00:54:01,673 Guy's come up with some great jokes 979 00:54:01,716 --> 00:54:03,457 and he thinks they'll really help the picture. 980 00:54:03,501 --> 00:54:04,850 He wants you to come over and hear 'em. 981 00:54:04,893 --> 00:54:05,938 - Jokes, what is he talking about, jokes? 982 00:54:05,981 --> 00:54:07,505 He wants jokes? 983 00:54:07,548 --> 00:54:09,594 Tell him to come down here, I'll put him in the picture. 984 00:54:09,637 --> 00:54:11,160 - That's just it, Harry. 985 00:54:11,204 --> 00:54:14,033 If you don't go see him, he will come down here. 986 00:54:15,295 --> 00:54:17,036 - All right, all right. 987 00:54:17,732 --> 00:54:19,299 I'll give him five minutes, all right. 988 00:54:19,343 --> 00:54:20,474 Just wait here, okay? 989 00:54:20,518 --> 00:54:22,084 Look Rosie, you gotta help me out here. 990 00:54:22,128 --> 00:54:23,390 This is an incredibly important number. 991 00:54:23,434 --> 00:54:25,174 So stay here, watch everything. 992 00:54:25,218 --> 00:54:26,567 Make sure you handle it, okay? 993 00:54:26,611 --> 00:54:28,047 I love you, I love you. 994 00:54:28,090 --> 00:54:29,091 Okay, come on Eddie. 995 00:54:29,135 --> 00:54:30,919 Let's get out of here. 996 00:54:31,877 --> 00:54:33,661 - Okay, everybody. 997 00:54:33,705 --> 00:54:35,272 This is a full rehearsal. 998 00:54:35,315 --> 00:54:37,012 Everything works. 999 00:54:37,056 --> 00:54:38,710 - Lights, cameras, action. 1000 00:54:38,753 --> 00:54:39,972 - Take him up. 1001 00:54:43,192 --> 00:54:45,020 Music, Dick. 1002 00:54:45,064 --> 00:54:46,326 And action, Mary. 1003 00:54:48,023 --> 00:54:49,068 Oh belles. 1004 00:54:49,895 --> 00:54:54,900 [birds singing] [piano music] 1005 00:55:02,603 --> 00:55:07,608 ♪ We're just dancing dildos are we ♪ 1006 00:55:09,001 --> 00:55:13,962 ♪ Dancing you see just for you 1007 00:55:15,007 --> 00:55:19,881 ♪ We're just dildos out on a spree ♪ 1008 00:55:20,926 --> 00:55:25,931 ♪ Happy to be here with you 1009 00:55:27,280 --> 00:55:32,285 ♪ Dancing dildos we meet the test ♪ 1010 00:55:33,242 --> 00:55:38,247 ♪ We'll stand up tall and then you do the rest ♪ 1011 00:55:38,291 --> 00:55:39,466 ♪ And then 1012 00:55:39,510 --> 00:55:45,951 ♪ Dancing dildos aren't we gay, yes sir ♪ 1013 00:55:45,994 --> 00:55:50,999 ♪ Dancing all night and all day ♪ 1014 00:55:51,609 --> 00:55:56,570 ♪ Dancing dildos, dancing our life away ♪ 1015 00:55:57,658 --> 00:56:00,444 ♪ Wouldn't you like to play 1016 00:56:00,487 --> 00:56:05,927 ♪ Come on and dance with us 1017 00:56:07,015 --> 00:56:08,974 [humming] 1018 00:56:14,283 --> 00:56:16,677 - Belles, push your buttons. 1019 00:56:18,157 --> 00:56:20,768 [kazoo music] 1020 00:56:33,172 --> 00:56:34,129 - John. 1021 00:56:34,173 --> 00:56:35,914 John, stop the crane. 1022 00:56:35,957 --> 00:56:37,002 John. 1023 00:56:37,045 --> 00:56:41,049 - Take me up. - John! [screaming] 1024 00:56:42,137 --> 00:56:43,443 - Take me down. 1025 00:56:48,927 --> 00:56:50,450 - Rope burns. 1026 00:56:50,494 --> 00:56:51,277 My hands. 1027 00:56:51,320 --> 00:56:53,105 All right John, John? 1028 00:56:53,148 --> 00:56:55,194 No, no, John. 1029 00:56:57,196 --> 00:56:58,415 No, no. 1030 00:57:14,518 --> 00:57:16,607 - Ow! Dildo jerk. 1031 00:57:22,961 --> 00:57:25,006 [crashing] 1032 00:57:31,099 --> 00:57:33,362 [indistinct] 1033 00:57:36,409 --> 00:57:37,410 - John, cut. 1034 00:57:44,243 --> 00:57:47,115 [muffled speaking] 1035 00:57:50,771 --> 00:57:52,556 We've gotta get Harry. 1036 00:57:52,599 --> 00:57:55,123 [crew yelling] 1037 00:58:01,216 --> 00:58:03,305 - Put down for a closeup. 1038 00:58:14,578 --> 00:58:15,666 - Cut. 1039 00:58:15,709 --> 00:58:17,319 Cut, stop the music! 1040 00:58:18,756 --> 00:58:20,148 I will not do the scene 1041 00:58:20,192 --> 00:58:23,543 until these damn dildos know their steps. 1042 00:58:23,587 --> 00:58:25,502 I am an actress. 1043 00:58:25,545 --> 00:58:27,416 I've studied with Strasberg, 1044 00:58:27,460 --> 00:58:29,723 and I don't need this shit. 1045 00:58:33,814 --> 00:58:36,208 I'm going to my dressing room. 1046 00:58:39,907 --> 00:58:41,082 - John? 1047 00:58:41,126 --> 00:58:42,344 - Yes. 1048 00:58:42,388 --> 00:58:44,912 - John, I think we need another rehearsal. 1049 00:58:44,956 --> 00:58:48,916 You'd better go and talk to Mary and see what you can do. 1050 00:58:48,960 --> 00:58:49,743 You. - I? 1051 00:58:50,614 --> 00:58:53,399 - You are the director. 1052 00:58:59,013 --> 00:59:01,450 [hammering] 1053 00:59:07,282 --> 00:59:10,590 - What is it you little twerp? 1054 00:59:10,634 --> 00:59:12,157 - Excuse me, Miss La Rue. 1055 00:59:12,200 --> 00:59:15,726 I know you and I have the utmost respect 1056 00:59:15,769 --> 00:59:17,945 for each other as professionals. 1057 00:59:17,989 --> 00:59:20,557 - Who said you could come in my room? 1058 00:59:20,600 --> 00:59:22,776 Get back behind that line. 1059 00:59:26,780 --> 00:59:27,912 - I'm sorry. 1060 00:59:27,955 --> 00:59:30,610 Look, can we talk nicely about this? 1061 00:59:30,654 --> 00:59:32,177 - No, we cannot. 1062 00:59:32,220 --> 00:59:33,482 - But. 1063 00:59:33,526 --> 00:59:38,139 - Look, John, I think we need some more donuts. 1064 00:59:38,183 --> 00:59:38,923 I'll talk her. 1065 00:59:38,966 --> 00:59:40,968 - Donuts, great. - Great. 1066 00:59:44,058 --> 00:59:46,278 Now what's this, huh? 1067 00:59:46,321 --> 00:59:50,021 - Harry, I'm so glad you came to talk to me. 1068 00:59:50,064 --> 00:59:53,546 I don't like any of the other people on this picture. 1069 00:59:53,590 --> 00:59:55,940 - That's okay, they don't like you either. 1070 00:59:55,983 --> 00:59:57,028 Now listen, sweetheart. 1071 00:59:57,071 --> 00:59:58,899 I got a picture to make here. 1072 00:59:58,943 --> 01:00:01,249 I can't replace you, you're in too much footage already. 1073 01:00:01,293 --> 01:00:03,687 And then you throwing me way behind schedule. 1074 01:00:03,730 --> 01:00:05,993 And I was behind schedule even before there was a schedule, 1075 01:00:06,037 --> 01:00:09,388 so stop jerking around, okay? 1076 01:00:09,954 --> 01:00:11,608 - Well, that does put us 1077 01:00:11,651 --> 01:00:14,741 in a bit of a predicament, doesn't it? 1078 01:00:15,394 --> 01:00:16,656 Kiss me, Harry. 1079 01:00:19,050 --> 01:00:22,009 I said, kiss me, Harry, 1080 01:00:22,053 --> 01:00:23,924 then I'll do the scene. 1081 01:00:27,536 --> 01:00:28,320 - Oh shit. 1082 01:00:33,064 --> 01:00:35,414 [clapping] 1083 01:00:37,068 --> 01:00:38,678 - Real cute Harry. 1084 01:00:38,722 --> 01:00:40,114 You ought to be in the picture. 1085 01:00:40,158 --> 01:00:41,855 - Look, now get in there and do this scene, okay? 1086 01:00:41,899 --> 01:00:44,902 - Anything you say, Harry. 1087 01:00:44,945 --> 01:00:47,034 Not his type of woman, huh? 1088 01:00:47,078 --> 01:00:49,123 Tough titty, isn't it? 1089 01:00:49,167 --> 01:00:51,038 - That's what I've heard. 1090 01:00:51,082 --> 01:00:53,606 - Ooh, real cute honey. 1091 01:00:54,912 --> 01:00:56,348 - Thanks, honey. 1092 01:01:00,395 --> 01:01:02,223 - She's blackmailing me, do you believe it? 1093 01:01:02,267 --> 01:01:03,094 - No. 1094 01:01:06,750 --> 01:01:09,013 - [Man] Perversion, take one. 1095 01:01:21,373 --> 01:01:24,463 - Hello, all you wonderful perverts. 1096 01:01:24,506 --> 01:01:27,640 I am so happy to be with you tonight. 1097 01:01:31,600 --> 01:01:33,951 [piano music] 1098 01:01:35,866 --> 01:01:37,868 ♪ Perversion 1099 01:01:37,911 --> 01:01:42,307 ♪ Anything goes 1100 01:01:42,350 --> 01:01:44,352 ♪ You name it, I'm game it 1101 01:01:44,396 --> 01:01:48,835 ♪ Wouldn't matter what game you chose ♪ 1102 01:01:48,879 --> 01:01:53,884 ♪ I'll play hard to get if that gets you hard ♪ 1103 01:01:55,755 --> 01:01:59,019 ♪ I'll be the queen or I'll be the king ♪ 1104 01:01:59,063 --> 01:02:02,544 ♪ You deal the cards 1105 01:02:03,807 --> 01:02:06,200 ♪ Perversion 1106 01:02:06,244 --> 01:02:10,770 ♪ Whatever's fair 1107 01:02:10,814 --> 01:02:12,772 ♪ Give voice to a choice you 1108 01:02:12,816 --> 01:02:17,385 ♪ Wouldn't ordinarily dare 1109 01:02:17,429 --> 01:02:22,303 ♪ Some horseplay or a bit of coitus ♪ 1110 01:02:23,696 --> 01:02:27,047 ♪ We'll be so wild if they ever arrest us ♪ 1111 01:02:27,091 --> 01:02:31,051 ♪ They'll never acquit us 1112 01:02:31,095 --> 01:02:34,315 ♪ So bind me and tie me 1113 01:02:34,359 --> 01:02:38,015 ♪ Free me and fly me 1114 01:02:38,058 --> 01:02:41,235 ♪ Pay up and buy me 1115 01:02:41,279 --> 01:02:45,065 ♪ Or do something worse 1116 01:02:45,109 --> 01:02:50,114 ♪ As long as it's perverse 1117 01:02:53,465 --> 01:02:55,641 ♪ Perversion 1118 01:02:55,684 --> 01:02:59,950 ♪ Isn't it fun 1119 01:02:59,993 --> 01:03:01,865 ♪ To do things, such new things ♪ 1120 01:03:01,908 --> 01:03:06,347 ♪ Things that people think can't be done ♪ 1121 01:03:06,391 --> 01:03:11,962 ♪ I'll wear black lace and naughty, sexy regalia ♪ 1122 01:03:13,093 --> 01:03:19,230 ♪ Or if you like you can dress up in that paraphernalia ♪ 1123 01:03:20,274 --> 01:03:23,625 ♪ So let's just not sit here 1124 01:03:23,669 --> 01:03:26,846 ♪ Let's get down to it here 1125 01:03:26,890 --> 01:03:30,763 ♪ It won't hurt a bit here 1126 01:03:30,807 --> 01:03:34,114 ♪ Or maybe it will 1127 01:03:34,158 --> 01:03:37,814 ♪ Perversion my old thrill 1128 01:03:55,092 --> 01:03:57,921 [phone ringing] 1129 01:03:57,964 --> 01:03:59,226 - Screening room. 1130 01:04:01,925 --> 01:04:03,056 Eddie. 1131 01:04:03,100 --> 01:04:04,841 Eddie, what are you talking about? 1132 01:04:04,884 --> 01:04:06,146 Eddie, Eddie. 1133 01:04:06,190 --> 01:04:08,018 I can't go to the goddamn racetrack with you. 1134 01:04:08,061 --> 01:04:09,019 I'm trying to make a picture here. 1135 01:04:09,062 --> 01:04:10,063 Wait, wait, hold on. 1136 01:04:10,107 --> 01:04:11,151 What's the matter? 1137 01:04:11,195 --> 01:04:12,022 - It's chaos down there. 1138 01:04:12,065 --> 01:04:12,587 - Goodbye Eddie. 1139 01:04:12,631 --> 01:04:14,111 - What, what? 1140 01:04:14,154 --> 01:04:16,896 - It's Mary La Rue, she scared the actor that has to, 1141 01:04:16,940 --> 01:04:19,507 he can't seem to make it get, he can't get. 1142 01:04:19,551 --> 01:04:20,944 - Oh, shit. 1143 01:04:20,987 --> 01:04:24,077 - Harry, I've gotta get out of this business. 1144 01:04:24,121 --> 01:04:25,252 - Now. 1145 01:04:25,296 --> 01:04:27,602 Think about the scene, 1146 01:04:28,212 --> 01:04:30,083 and action. 1147 01:04:30,867 --> 01:04:34,044 - [Man] Scene swats on nerve, take 12. 1148 01:04:52,018 --> 01:04:54,934 - Will you get that thing up already? 1149 01:04:54,978 --> 01:04:55,935 Come on, boy. 1150 01:04:55,979 --> 01:04:57,023 Come on, up. 1151 01:04:57,067 --> 01:04:58,895 Up, up, come on. 1152 01:04:58,938 --> 01:05:00,200 Come on, come on. 1153 01:05:00,984 --> 01:05:02,159 Oh cut, cut. 1154 01:05:02,202 --> 01:05:02,899 - All right, all right. 1155 01:05:02,942 --> 01:05:04,509 What's the problem here? 1156 01:05:04,552 --> 01:05:07,555 - I wouldn't work with this bitch if my life depended on it. 1157 01:05:07,599 --> 01:05:09,514 Get yourself another penis. 1158 01:05:10,602 --> 01:05:12,909 - Well, you've really done it this time, haven't you? 1159 01:05:12,952 --> 01:05:15,085 - No, but I'd like to. 1160 01:05:15,128 --> 01:05:16,956 Why don't you do the scene, Harry? 1161 01:05:17,000 --> 01:05:18,392 - Yeah Harry, why don't you do the scene? 1162 01:05:18,436 --> 01:05:19,785 - Look, would you get on the phone? 1163 01:05:19,828 --> 01:05:21,961 Get me a stunt cock, one that doesn't scare easily. 1164 01:05:22,005 --> 01:05:23,093 - Stunt cock? 1165 01:05:23,136 --> 01:05:24,921 Did you just ask me for a stunt cock? 1166 01:05:24,964 --> 01:05:27,967 - Stunt cock. - Stunt cock. 1167 01:05:28,011 --> 01:05:30,927 Where can I find that, in the Yellow Pages? 1168 01:05:32,015 --> 01:05:33,451 - In the meantime, Harry, 1169 01:05:33,494 --> 01:05:35,192 why don't you come on up to my dressing room? 1170 01:05:35,235 --> 01:05:36,628 - Look, don't make me get violent. 1171 01:05:36,671 --> 01:05:38,325 Just be ready to do the scene, okay? 1172 01:05:38,369 --> 01:05:39,674 You understand? 1173 01:05:39,718 --> 01:05:42,025 - Oh, I love it when you get angry, Harry. 1174 01:05:42,068 --> 01:05:45,028 Admit it Harry, we're perfect for each other. 1175 01:05:45,071 --> 01:05:46,986 Even our names, 1176 01:05:47,030 --> 01:05:48,770 Harry and Mary. 1177 01:05:51,121 --> 01:05:53,166 - Just be ready to do the scene. 1178 01:06:01,131 --> 01:06:03,960 [people chatting] 1179 01:06:19,062 --> 01:06:20,193 - Pardon me? 1180 01:06:20,237 --> 01:06:21,716 This is stage five, isn't it? 1181 01:06:21,760 --> 01:06:22,979 - Yeah. 1182 01:06:23,022 --> 01:06:23,805 - Good. 1183 01:06:34,991 --> 01:06:38,037 - Are you always like that? 1184 01:06:38,690 --> 01:06:39,996 - Yeah, always. 1185 01:06:41,867 --> 01:06:43,260 - John? 1186 01:06:43,303 --> 01:06:44,913 Here's a stunt cock. 1187 01:06:49,005 --> 01:06:51,442 - Your stunt cock is here. 1188 01:06:51,485 --> 01:06:54,010 Your stunt cock is here. 1189 01:06:54,053 --> 01:06:55,054 - Ah. 1190 01:07:03,323 --> 01:07:05,499 Now, Mister, 1191 01:07:05,934 --> 01:07:07,980 I'm sorry, I didn't catch your name. 1192 01:07:08,024 --> 01:07:09,416 - Henry Schlong. 1193 01:07:10,591 --> 01:07:11,375 - Schlong? 1194 01:07:12,550 --> 01:07:13,681 That Chinese? 1195 01:07:14,943 --> 01:07:16,162 Now in the scene, 1196 01:07:17,598 --> 01:07:18,991 you know, I, 1197 01:07:19,035 --> 01:07:22,908 I wouldn't wear the dark glasses or the hat because, 1198 01:07:22,951 --> 01:07:27,826 in the scene you're supposed to be a, you know, making love. 1199 01:07:27,869 --> 01:07:29,132 - I'm not here for making love. 1200 01:07:29,175 --> 01:07:30,568 I'm here for fucking. 1201 01:07:30,611 --> 01:07:33,092 I do this eight hours a day. 1202 01:07:33,136 --> 01:07:35,747 [laughing] 1203 01:07:35,790 --> 01:07:36,878 - Now in this scene. 1204 01:07:36,922 --> 01:07:38,837 - He knows what to do, dipshit. 1205 01:07:38,880 --> 01:07:40,317 - Oh, very well. 1206 01:07:40,360 --> 01:07:42,014 Shall we get a rehearsal? 1207 01:07:42,058 --> 01:07:43,102 - Rehearsal? 1208 01:07:43,146 --> 01:07:45,844 Just roll the goddamn camera. 1209 01:07:45,887 --> 01:07:47,193 - Fine, 1210 01:07:47,237 --> 01:07:49,369 lights, cameras. 1211 01:07:50,022 --> 01:07:51,110 - Knock it off. 1212 01:07:51,154 --> 01:07:52,590 Action. 1213 01:07:56,028 --> 01:07:58,770 - [Man] Cock inserts, take one. 1214 01:07:58,813 --> 01:08:01,251 [Mary moaning] 1215 01:08:02,513 --> 01:08:05,168 - You say you're always like this. 1216 01:08:05,211 --> 01:08:06,995 - Always. 1217 01:08:07,039 --> 01:08:08,910 Something about my body chemistry. 1218 01:08:08,954 --> 01:08:10,869 I have a perpetual erection. 1219 01:08:11,957 --> 01:08:14,394 [Mary moaning] 1220 01:08:43,249 --> 01:08:45,686 - [Man] We ran out of film, cut. 1221 01:08:47,993 --> 01:08:50,082 - John, you ran out of film. 1222 01:08:50,126 --> 01:08:52,998 [Mary still moaning] 1223 01:08:58,438 --> 01:08:59,222 - Cut. 1224 01:09:01,180 --> 01:09:04,096 [Mary moaning] 1225 01:09:04,140 --> 01:09:06,316 [coughing] 1226 01:09:06,359 --> 01:09:07,143 Cut. 1227 01:09:14,193 --> 01:09:15,890 Why disturb them? 1228 01:09:15,934 --> 01:09:17,979 We'll tell them later. 1229 01:09:33,125 --> 01:09:33,908 - See ya. 1230 01:09:35,301 --> 01:09:39,262 - God, wouldn't you love to have somebody like him? 1231 01:09:39,305 --> 01:09:41,655 God, I sure would. 1232 01:09:41,699 --> 01:09:43,962 - He was just so big. 1233 01:09:45,050 --> 01:09:47,574 He was just so big. 1234 01:09:53,189 --> 01:09:56,975 - Yeah, well you got someone better, right? 1235 01:09:57,018 --> 01:09:57,932 - Oh right. 1236 01:09:59,020 --> 01:10:00,892 But he was just so big. 1237 01:10:01,719 --> 01:10:03,199 It was just so big. 1238 01:10:05,418 --> 01:10:08,073 [funky music] 1239 01:11:16,663 --> 01:11:18,883 - Well, it's not bad, not bad. 1240 01:11:18,926 --> 01:11:19,797 But we're so far behind. 1241 01:11:19,840 --> 01:11:21,102 We only have two days left, 1242 01:11:21,146 --> 01:11:24,454 and that dumb kid just keeps hanging around. 1243 01:11:24,497 --> 01:11:26,194 - Why don't you send him on some more errands? 1244 01:11:26,238 --> 01:11:27,805 - Where can I send him? 1245 01:11:27,848 --> 01:11:30,938 We got 8 million donuts piled up in the back of the stage. 1246 01:11:39,077 --> 01:11:40,644 I got it. 1247 01:11:40,687 --> 01:11:41,427 - What? 1248 01:11:42,515 --> 01:11:45,518 - We'll send him for script changes. 1249 01:11:45,562 --> 01:11:47,128 - Script changes? 1250 01:11:48,042 --> 01:11:49,130 - To Wanda's. 1251 01:11:50,175 --> 01:11:50,958 - Wanda. 1252 01:11:52,395 --> 01:11:53,831 John? 1253 01:11:53,874 --> 01:11:56,007 [laughing] 1254 01:12:01,404 --> 01:12:03,536 - Wanda, oh Wanda? 1255 01:12:03,580 --> 01:12:04,755 Wanda? 1256 01:12:11,414 --> 01:12:12,197 Excuse me. 1257 01:12:13,024 --> 01:12:14,330 I'm supposed to 1258 01:12:15,940 --> 01:12:19,291 pick up some script changes from someone named, 1259 01:12:20,684 --> 01:12:21,467 Wanda. 1260 01:12:23,034 --> 01:12:24,035 - Sure, honey. 1261 01:12:24,078 --> 01:12:25,297 We understand. 1262 01:12:26,994 --> 01:12:29,954 - But Wanda's a little busy right now. 1263 01:12:32,217 --> 01:12:36,395 - Could, could, could, could one of you give it to me? 1264 01:12:36,439 --> 01:12:37,875 - You bet, sugar. 1265 01:12:47,711 --> 01:12:50,714 ♪ Hello honey, what'cha doin' tonight ♪ 1266 01:12:50,757 --> 01:12:55,762 ♪ I haven't seen you around here, you must be new ♪ 1267 01:12:56,023 --> 01:12:58,852 ♪ Hello honey, what'cha doing tonight ♪ 1268 01:12:58,896 --> 01:13:03,901 ♪ Because whatever it is I'd like to do it with you ♪ 1269 01:13:05,511 --> 01:13:07,905 ♪ You've got a nice face, nice smile ♪ 1270 01:13:07,948 --> 01:13:10,429 ♪ C'mon up to my place for a while ♪ 1271 01:13:10,473 --> 01:13:13,258 ♪ Don't you see now how the time is right ♪ 1272 01:13:13,301 --> 01:13:17,175 ♪ So tell me honey what'cha doin' tonight ♪ 1273 01:13:17,218 --> 01:13:19,307 - Oh, I was just leaving. 1274 01:13:20,396 --> 01:13:23,529 ♪ Hello honey, what'cha doin' tonight ♪ 1275 01:13:23,573 --> 01:13:28,534 ♪ You want an evening's worth of fun you just say the word ♪ 1276 01:13:28,578 --> 01:13:31,494 ♪ C'mon, honey, what'cha doin' tonight ♪ 1277 01:13:31,537 --> 01:13:36,281 ♪ 'Cause if you feel uptight, we're gonna get that cured ♪ 1278 01:13:36,324 --> 01:13:38,065 ♪ Whoa, whoa, whoa 1279 01:13:38,109 --> 01:13:40,285 ♪ It could be so nice with you tonight ♪ 1280 01:13:40,328 --> 01:13:42,853 ♪ Believe me babe the price is right ♪ 1281 01:13:42,896 --> 01:13:45,899 ♪ C'mon, honey, you just fight that fright ♪ 1282 01:13:45,943 --> 01:13:49,947 ♪ And tell me honey what'cha doin' tonight ♪ 1283 01:13:49,990 --> 01:13:50,991 - Thank you. 1284 01:13:53,167 --> 01:13:56,170 ♪ I've got an empty room just sitting there ♪ 1285 01:13:56,214 --> 01:14:01,001 ♪ And I would like to fill it up with you ♪ 1286 01:14:01,045 --> 01:14:04,831 ♪ It hasn't got a sofa, it hasn't got a chair ♪ 1287 01:14:04,875 --> 01:14:09,140 ♪ It's only got one piece of furniture but it'll do ♪ 1288 01:14:09,923 --> 01:14:13,797 ♪ Hello, honey, what'cha doin' tonight ♪ 1289 01:14:18,279 --> 01:14:21,805 ♪ Hello, honey, what'cha doin' tonight ♪ 1290 01:14:26,287 --> 01:14:30,944 ♪ Nice face, nice smile, c'mon up to my place for a while ♪ 1291 01:14:30,988 --> 01:14:33,643 ♪ Don't you see now how the time is right ♪ 1292 01:14:33,686 --> 01:14:36,820 ♪ So tell me honey what'cha doin' tonight ♪ 1293 01:14:36,863 --> 01:14:38,865 - I'm having dinner with my mother. 1294 01:14:38,909 --> 01:14:41,041 ♪ Honey what'cha doin' tonight 1295 01:14:41,085 --> 01:14:42,652 - I'd really love to stay. 1296 01:14:42,695 --> 01:14:45,655 ♪ Honey what'cha doin' tonight 1297 01:14:45,698 --> 01:14:46,699 - Call girls. 1298 01:14:46,743 --> 01:14:49,049 ♪ Honey what'cha doin'... 1299 01:14:53,140 --> 01:14:57,188 ♪ tonight 1300 01:15:00,017 --> 01:15:01,714 ♪ Tonight 1301 01:15:06,110 --> 01:15:09,113 - Oh la la, la la la la la la la la. 1302 01:15:12,551 --> 01:15:15,162 Oh yeah, far out. 1303 01:15:15,641 --> 01:15:16,468 Oh, right. 1304 01:15:18,949 --> 01:15:21,168 [yawning] 1305 01:15:23,519 --> 01:15:25,433 - Cut, cut cut cut. 1306 01:15:25,477 --> 01:15:28,785 Mary, Mary, what are you doing? 1307 01:15:28,828 --> 01:15:31,570 Oh Harry honey, I hate to be a pooper, 1308 01:15:31,614 --> 01:15:34,007 but with a cock in me. 1309 01:15:34,051 --> 01:15:36,183 - Why should now be any different? 1310 01:15:37,271 --> 01:15:38,882 - Listen you bitch, 1311 01:15:38,925 --> 01:15:42,015 I've had just about all I can take of you. 1312 01:15:42,059 --> 01:15:45,366 - You know, somehow I don't mind being called a bitch, 1313 01:15:45,410 --> 01:15:47,978 especially when it comes from the original. 1314 01:15:49,022 --> 01:15:51,808 - Harry, are you going to allow this person 1315 01:15:51,851 --> 01:15:53,984 to talk to me like this? 1316 01:15:54,027 --> 01:15:55,942 After all I am the star. 1317 01:15:56,943 --> 01:15:59,032 How dare you talk to me like that. 1318 01:15:59,076 --> 01:16:01,208 Do you know who I am? 1319 01:16:01,252 --> 01:16:03,471 - Why, can't you remember? 1320 01:16:05,996 --> 01:16:06,997 - Get out of here. 1321 01:16:07,040 --> 01:16:07,867 - You get outta here. 1322 01:16:07,911 --> 01:16:08,912 - What? 1323 01:16:08,955 --> 01:16:10,566 You heard me, I've had it with you. 1324 01:16:10,609 --> 01:16:11,958 - Oh, but Harry honey. 1325 01:16:12,002 --> 01:16:14,439 - Don't give me any of that Harry honey bullshit. 1326 01:16:14,482 --> 01:16:15,396 You are the one who's getting out of here, 1327 01:16:15,440 --> 01:16:16,746 and you're getting out now. 1328 01:16:16,789 --> 01:16:18,051 Now you're fired. 1329 01:16:18,095 --> 01:16:19,139 Get outta here. 1330 01:16:20,880 --> 01:16:22,360 - Well, I never. 1331 01:16:22,403 --> 01:16:23,491 - Oh, really? 1332 01:16:24,797 --> 01:16:25,581 - Fag! 1333 01:16:30,281 --> 01:16:33,806 [somber harmonica music] 1334 01:16:36,287 --> 01:16:37,941 - Okay everyone, it's a wrap. 1335 01:16:37,984 --> 01:16:39,899 I'll see you all tomorrow at seven. 1336 01:16:40,900 --> 01:16:42,510 - [Man] It's a wrap. 1337 01:16:46,253 --> 01:16:47,907 - I'm sorry, Harry. 1338 01:16:50,693 --> 01:16:52,477 - It's not your fault. 1339 01:16:53,696 --> 01:16:56,176 She had it coming for a long time, anyway. 1340 01:17:02,095 --> 01:17:03,401 I got no star. 1341 01:17:04,402 --> 01:17:05,882 I got one day left. 1342 01:17:10,930 --> 01:17:13,019 Those sons of bitches are gonna win. 1343 01:17:14,368 --> 01:17:15,805 - No, they're not. 1344 01:17:15,848 --> 01:17:18,851 You'll think of something, you always do. 1345 01:17:18,895 --> 01:17:20,200 - Yeah. 1346 01:17:20,244 --> 01:17:21,898 Something will work out. 1347 01:17:21,941 --> 01:17:24,204 Or I can be shopping here in a couple of months. 1348 01:17:33,736 --> 01:17:35,694 Schechter not Schechner. 1349 01:17:37,261 --> 01:17:39,655 [mumbling] 1350 01:17:40,830 --> 01:17:43,354 [tingling music] 1351 01:17:43,397 --> 01:17:44,529 I've got it. 1352 01:17:44,572 --> 01:17:46,574 Goddamn it, I've got it. 1353 01:17:51,536 --> 01:17:54,408 - I'll go back to the House of Pies [indistinct]. 1354 01:17:54,452 --> 01:17:56,062 I still have that outfit. 1355 01:17:56,106 --> 01:17:56,846 I ended up. 1356 01:17:56,889 --> 01:17:59,718 [phone ringing] 1357 01:18:00,588 --> 01:18:01,720 Hello? 1358 01:18:01,764 --> 01:18:03,113 - [Harry] I got it, Rosie I got it. 1359 01:18:03,156 --> 01:18:05,985 - Well, I didn't give it to you. 1360 01:18:12,775 --> 01:18:15,125 [phone ringing] 1361 01:18:15,168 --> 01:18:16,039 - Harry? 1362 01:18:16,082 --> 01:18:17,214 I'm sorry, I was still asleep. 1363 01:18:17,257 --> 01:18:18,606 What is it? 1364 01:18:18,650 --> 01:18:19,912 - Look Rosie, I figured out what's gonna save us. 1365 01:18:19,956 --> 01:18:21,697 I figured out who's gonna do the number. 1366 01:18:21,740 --> 01:18:23,481 - [Rosie] You did, great, who? 1367 01:18:23,524 --> 01:18:25,613 - Three guesses. 1368 01:18:25,657 --> 01:18:27,050 - Harry, it's 3:30 in the morning. 1369 01:18:27,093 --> 01:18:28,138 Don't play three guesses 1370 01:18:28,181 --> 01:18:30,053 with a person at 3:30 in the morning. 1371 01:18:30,096 --> 01:18:31,402 Who's gonna do the number? 1372 01:18:31,445 --> 01:18:32,185 - You. 1373 01:18:33,447 --> 01:18:35,754 - Harry, you must be having a very bad dream. 1374 01:18:35,798 --> 01:18:37,060 Go back to sleep. 1375 01:18:37,103 --> 01:18:38,061 - Oh no, no, no dream. 1376 01:18:38,104 --> 01:18:39,236 Now look, come on. 1377 01:18:39,279 --> 01:18:41,107 You've seen the routine a hundred times. 1378 01:18:41,151 --> 01:18:42,805 I've seen you tap dance, I know you can do it. 1379 01:18:42,848 --> 01:18:44,154 Come on, if you don't do the number, 1380 01:18:44,197 --> 01:18:46,112 you're gonna make my father a very unhappy man. 1381 01:18:46,156 --> 01:18:47,984 And at 85, he doesn't need the aggravation. 1382 01:18:48,027 --> 01:18:49,942 Now, come on, there's no pressure. 1383 01:18:49,986 --> 01:18:51,770 Just take your time. 1384 01:18:51,814 --> 01:18:52,989 Okay, times up Rosie. 1385 01:18:54,164 --> 01:18:56,862 - Harry, I can't, really. 1386 01:18:56,906 --> 01:19:00,692 - Please, please, please, Rosie for me. 1387 01:19:00,736 --> 01:19:01,780 - You got it. 1388 01:19:01,824 --> 01:19:03,956 Gee, I'm glad there was no pressure. 1389 01:19:04,000 --> 01:19:05,828 - [Harry] Rosie, I love you. 1390 01:19:05,871 --> 01:19:07,917 - I love you too, Harry. 1391 01:19:07,960 --> 01:19:09,048 - Okay, all right, now go back to sleep, 1392 01:19:09,092 --> 01:19:10,006 I'm gonna call George and tell him 1393 01:19:10,049 --> 01:19:11,268 you're doing the number with him. 1394 01:19:11,311 --> 01:19:12,051 Okay, bye. 1395 01:19:12,095 --> 01:19:12,878 - Bye. 1396 01:19:18,057 --> 01:19:19,450 Oh shit. 1397 01:19:26,631 --> 01:19:27,806 - Thanks a lot, Jay. 1398 01:19:27,850 --> 01:19:29,025 See you later. 1399 01:19:33,943 --> 01:19:36,075 - God, 5:00 a.m. 1400 01:19:44,388 --> 01:19:47,739 Hi there, what are you doing out this late all alone? 1401 01:19:47,783 --> 01:19:50,568 My name is George, George Brennan. 1402 01:19:51,569 --> 01:19:53,049 - Give me your money. 1403 01:19:53,092 --> 01:19:55,268 - My, you have a deep voice. 1404 01:19:58,706 --> 01:20:01,274 Didn't even tell me your name, ya creep. 1405 01:20:01,318 --> 01:20:04,364 I don't believe it, mugged in front of my own building. 1406 01:20:04,408 --> 01:20:05,104 All right. 1407 01:20:06,236 --> 01:20:08,368 - Mugged in front of his own building. 1408 01:20:08,412 --> 01:20:10,718 I don't believe it, if it's not one thing, it's another. 1409 01:20:10,762 --> 01:20:12,024 How the hell can you make a picture around here. 1410 01:20:12,068 --> 01:20:13,330 - Stop pacing. 1411 01:20:13,373 --> 01:20:15,419 His eye can't be all that bad. 1412 01:20:15,462 --> 01:20:16,246 - George? 1413 01:20:19,945 --> 01:20:22,992 All the makeup in the world isn't going to cover that thing. 1414 01:20:24,732 --> 01:20:25,951 About the only good thing that's happened 1415 01:20:25,995 --> 01:20:27,910 is that John hasn't showed up. 1416 01:20:27,953 --> 01:20:29,955 - Maybe he's still at Wanda's. 1417 01:20:29,999 --> 01:20:31,000 - All night? 1418 01:20:49,757 --> 01:20:51,759 - Hi girls, how are you? 1419 01:20:53,065 --> 01:20:55,241 That's a nice set of knockers you got there. 1420 01:20:55,285 --> 01:20:56,068 Beep beep. 1421 01:20:58,331 --> 01:21:01,465 Well, what are we all standing around for, huh? 1422 01:21:01,508 --> 01:21:05,904 What are we gonna do today, another fuck scene? [laughing] 1423 01:21:05,948 --> 01:21:07,863 Well, God let's get started 1424 01:21:07,906 --> 01:21:11,779 before that fart Harry gets down here. [laughing] 1425 01:21:11,823 --> 01:21:13,869 - What did you say, John? 1426 01:21:17,220 --> 01:21:19,439 [laughing] 1427 01:21:19,483 --> 01:21:21,485 - Mister Schechter. 1428 01:21:21,528 --> 01:21:22,965 I'm sorry I'm late. 1429 01:21:24,488 --> 01:21:27,970 That place you sent me to, that was some place. 1430 01:21:28,013 --> 01:21:29,885 I want to thank you. 1431 01:21:29,928 --> 01:21:31,408 - You're welcome. 1432 01:21:32,496 --> 01:21:34,933 - Heard about your problem, Harry. 1433 01:21:34,977 --> 01:21:36,892 What's happening? 1434 01:21:36,935 --> 01:21:39,024 - Well, it looks like we can't finish the picture, 1435 01:21:39,068 --> 01:21:41,635 so you tell me what's happening. 1436 01:21:43,072 --> 01:21:45,988 - Well, Benny and the boys and me have decided, 1437 01:21:46,031 --> 01:21:48,642 according to the terms of our contract, 1438 01:21:48,686 --> 01:21:51,254 well, you know, we're taking over the studio. 1439 01:22:01,786 --> 01:22:04,789 - Well, we almost made it didn't we? 1440 01:22:19,543 --> 01:22:22,285 I want to thank you all very much. 1441 01:22:30,858 --> 01:22:34,210 You'll be working for your Uncle Benny now, John. 1442 01:22:34,253 --> 01:22:35,733 - Wait a minute, I don't want to work for my Uncle Benny. 1443 01:22:35,776 --> 01:22:36,995 I hate my Uncle Benny. 1444 01:22:37,039 --> 01:22:39,867 My uncle Benny is a shit hook for doing this. 1445 01:22:39,911 --> 01:22:42,044 I can't do this picture without you here. 1446 01:22:42,087 --> 01:22:44,872 - Well John, I'm afraid there's nothing I can do about it, 1447 01:22:47,223 --> 01:22:48,137 But thanks. 1448 01:22:52,228 --> 01:22:54,012 - Wait a minute, wait a minute, Mister Schechter, 1449 01:22:54,056 --> 01:22:55,361 I have an idea. 1450 01:22:56,710 --> 01:22:58,277 I have an idea. 1451 01:22:58,321 --> 01:23:01,585 - Hey John boy, I think your Uncle Benny wants to see you. 1452 01:23:01,628 --> 01:23:03,674 And I mean, now. 1453 01:23:03,717 --> 01:23:07,025 - Mister Schechter, you can do the number. 1454 01:23:07,069 --> 01:23:08,548 - What, are you nuts? 1455 01:23:08,592 --> 01:23:10,986 - You know the routines better than anyone. 1456 01:23:11,029 --> 01:23:12,857 - He's right Harry, you know the routine. 1457 01:23:12,900 --> 01:23:14,293 - You're nuts. 1458 01:23:14,337 --> 01:23:16,165 Oh, I'm nuts, and I'm doing the number. 1459 01:23:16,208 --> 01:23:18,776 So unless you're nuts and you do the number, 1460 01:23:18,819 --> 01:23:21,126 You're gonna lose the studio, Harry. 1461 01:23:24,216 --> 01:23:25,000 - Rosie. 1462 01:23:26,914 --> 01:23:29,047 You got yourself, a new costar. 1463 01:23:29,091 --> 01:23:30,701 [crowd cheering] 1464 01:23:30,744 --> 01:23:33,095 - Look Mister Schechter, 1465 01:23:33,138 --> 01:23:35,619 I don't want you to worry about a thing, 1466 01:23:35,662 --> 01:23:38,100 because with my direction, you won't have to worry. 1467 01:23:38,143 --> 01:23:40,058 I'll take care of you. 1468 01:23:40,102 --> 01:23:41,625 - John boy, 1469 01:23:41,668 --> 01:23:44,889 are we really gonna need donuts today? 1470 01:23:44,932 --> 01:23:45,716 Go on. 1471 01:23:47,457 --> 01:23:48,240 - Right. 1472 01:23:51,026 --> 01:23:52,157 - Sorry Eddie, for this number, 1473 01:23:52,201 --> 01:23:54,507 it's gonna be a closed set. 1474 01:23:56,901 --> 01:23:58,337 Now listen, everybody. 1475 01:23:58,381 --> 01:24:00,731 We gotta pull together here and be like a family. 1476 01:24:00,774 --> 01:24:01,949 George, I'm gonna need your help. 1477 01:24:01,993 --> 01:24:03,038 I gotta brush up on the steps. 1478 01:24:03,081 --> 01:24:05,692 All right, everyone, let's go! 1479 01:24:14,310 --> 01:24:16,268 - Good evening, Mister and Missus America, 1480 01:24:16,312 --> 01:24:18,879 Navy Morgan in Hollywoodland, USA. 1481 01:24:18,923 --> 01:24:22,361 Tonight, we're attending the premier of a new Schechner, 1482 01:24:22,405 --> 01:24:24,842 I'm sorry, Schechter Studios production 1483 01:24:24,885 --> 01:24:27,627 of a brand new kind of musical. 1484 01:24:27,671 --> 01:24:30,543 The first, all singing, all dancing, porno, 1485 01:24:30,587 --> 01:24:32,589 the title, Come Come Now. 1486 01:24:32,632 --> 01:24:33,938 The crowds are outside. 1487 01:24:33,981 --> 01:24:35,548 You probably can hear them in the background, 1488 01:24:35,592 --> 01:24:37,768 and they're beginning to come into the door now. 1489 01:24:37,811 --> 01:24:42,033 Let's all go into the theater now and see, Come Come Now. 1490 01:24:42,512 --> 01:24:46,081 [dramatic orchestral music] 1491 01:24:47,430 --> 01:24:50,650 [audience applauding] 1492 01:24:57,962 --> 01:25:01,052 [show tune band music] 1493 01:25:01,096 --> 01:25:04,099 [audience laughing] 1494 01:25:37,044 --> 01:25:38,350 ♪ Let 'em eat cake 1495 01:25:38,394 --> 01:25:40,265 ♪ Let 'em eat hog dogs 1496 01:25:40,309 --> 01:25:41,832 ♪ Let 'em eat ol' hamburgers 1497 01:25:41,875 --> 01:25:43,790 ♪ If they haven't got dogs 1498 01:25:43,834 --> 01:25:48,795 ♪ Let 'em eat anything they feel they're due ♪ 1499 01:25:49,753 --> 01:25:54,714 ♪ Let 'em eat cake, but let me eat you ♪ 1500 01:25:57,108 --> 01:25:58,762 ♪ Let 'em eat cake 1501 01:25:58,805 --> 01:26:00,546 ♪ Let 'em eat hors d'oeuvres 1502 01:26:00,590 --> 01:26:01,939 ♪ And if they polish off all that ♪ 1503 01:26:01,982 --> 01:26:03,984 ♪ We'll give 'em some more d'oeuvres ♪ 1504 01:26:04,028 --> 01:26:09,033 ♪ Let 'em eat bagels, cream cheese, and lox ♪ 1505 01:26:10,077 --> 01:26:16,910 ♪ Let 'em eat cake, but let me, eat, that old proverbial box ♪ 1506 01:26:19,435 --> 01:26:24,440 ♪ People who eat lots of food tend to grow obese ♪ 1507 01:26:26,050 --> 01:26:31,011 ♪ Then they have to diet, that's the catch ♪ 1508 01:26:32,709 --> 01:26:37,714 ♪ But me I always eat my fill eat and never cease ♪ 1509 01:26:39,716 --> 01:26:45,548 ♪ But I never gain that weight, for I dine on snatch ♪ 1510 01:26:47,027 --> 01:26:50,205 ♪ Oh, what a diet, you've really got to try it ♪ 1511 01:26:50,248 --> 01:26:51,684 ♪ Let 'em eat cake 1512 01:26:51,728 --> 01:26:53,382 ♪ Let 'em eat rabbit 1513 01:26:53,425 --> 01:26:54,948 ♪ Let 'em eat chocolate-covered ants ♪ 1514 01:26:54,992 --> 01:26:56,907 ♪ If that is their habit 1515 01:26:56,950 --> 01:27:01,955 ♪ Let 'em eat anything they feel they're due ♪ 1516 01:27:02,913 --> 01:27:07,265 ♪ Let 'em eat cake, but let me eat ♪ 1517 01:27:07,309 --> 01:27:08,571 ♪ When I want to stuff my face 1518 01:27:08,614 --> 01:27:10,399 ♪ I just call my best friend Grace ♪ 1519 01:27:10,442 --> 01:27:12,096 ♪ Let me eat 1520 01:27:12,139 --> 01:27:13,793 ♪ Ask me dear what gets me high ♪ 1521 01:27:13,837 --> 01:27:15,491 ♪ It is your sweet honey pie 1522 01:27:15,534 --> 01:27:19,495 ♪ Let me eat you 1523 01:29:25,185 --> 01:29:30,190 ♪ Let 'em eat cake 1524 01:29:31,670 --> 01:29:36,675 ♪ Let 'em eat cake 1525 01:29:37,372 --> 01:29:44,770 ♪ But let me eat you 1526 01:29:53,953 --> 01:29:58,262 [audience applauding and cheering] 1527 01:30:01,526 --> 01:30:05,095 [light orchestral music] 1528 01:30:11,884 --> 01:30:13,712 - Harry, Harry. 1529 01:30:13,756 --> 01:30:15,758 - Congratulations, Miss Jones, you're gonna be a big star. 1530 01:30:15,801 --> 01:30:17,107 Here's my card. 1531 01:30:17,150 --> 01:30:18,369 - Hey, Juanita. 1532 01:30:18,413 --> 01:30:21,372 Where'd you get the name, The Cuban Comer? 1533 01:30:21,416 --> 01:30:23,766 - She got it from me. 1534 01:30:23,809 --> 01:30:26,203 You want to make something of it? 1535 01:30:26,246 --> 01:30:28,074 - George, George Brenner. 1536 01:30:28,945 --> 01:30:31,991 ♪ So touch me 1537 01:30:32,035 --> 01:30:34,429 ♪ I'm you 1538 01:30:34,472 --> 01:30:36,126 - Yes, actually my, you know, 1539 01:30:36,169 --> 01:30:37,954 my camera style derives more from Eisenstein 1540 01:30:37,997 --> 01:30:40,957 than Von Sternberg, but if you look closely, 1541 01:30:41,000 --> 01:30:44,003 I think you will find that there are undeniable traces. 1542 01:30:44,047 --> 01:30:45,918 - Let's talk about it on Monday. 1543 01:30:45,962 --> 01:30:48,834 We gotta talk about the sequel. 1544 01:30:48,878 --> 01:30:50,662 Come, Come Again. 1545 01:30:51,968 --> 01:30:53,099 If we hurry, we can do it in a month. 1546 01:30:53,143 --> 01:30:54,840 - Yeah sure, and when we talk about it, 1547 01:30:54,884 --> 01:30:59,366 we'll also talk about a new contract, right boys? 1548 01:30:59,410 --> 01:31:00,759 - Right. 1549 01:31:01,978 --> 01:31:03,501 - Get outta here. 1550 01:31:13,468 --> 01:31:15,078 We did it. 1551 01:31:15,121 --> 01:31:17,472 We're a hit, can you believe it? 1552 01:31:17,515 --> 01:31:18,647 From now on it's going to be 1553 01:31:18,690 --> 01:31:21,214 class A and straight up, huh, right? 1554 01:31:21,258 --> 01:31:22,607 - Right. 1555 01:31:22,651 --> 01:31:23,956 And we can let your father back on the lot again? 1556 01:31:24,000 --> 01:31:25,480 - Of course. 1557 01:31:25,523 --> 01:31:26,872 But wait, I've got a great idea for a new picture, too. 1558 01:31:26,916 --> 01:31:28,918 I thought of it the other day. 1559 01:31:28,961 --> 01:31:32,791 So it's going to be a Shakespearian porno. 1560 01:31:32,835 --> 01:31:35,185 We'll call it The Taming of the Blue. 1561 01:31:35,228 --> 01:31:36,142 - No, Harry. 1562 01:31:36,186 --> 01:31:36,882 - No? - No. 1563 01:31:36,926 --> 01:31:38,188 - You don't like that? 1564 01:31:38,231 --> 01:31:39,319 - All right, wait, I've got some other ones. 1565 01:31:39,363 --> 01:31:41,234 I got some great ideas. 1566 01:31:43,672 --> 01:31:45,761 How about this one? 1567 01:31:45,804 --> 01:31:48,415 Sort of a light romantic comedy, 1568 01:31:49,895 --> 01:31:52,158 about a young, hot shot producer 1569 01:31:52,202 --> 01:31:55,640 who marries his dancing secretary? 1570 01:31:58,164 --> 01:31:59,426 You like that one? 1571 01:31:59,470 --> 01:32:01,080 - That one I like. 1572 01:32:08,087 --> 01:32:08,914 - Shall we? 1573 01:32:08,958 --> 01:32:10,002 - Oh, yes. 1574 01:32:13,440 --> 01:32:17,619 [light romantic orchestral music] 1575 01:32:39,771 --> 01:32:42,252 ♪ Will I be boring 1576 01:32:42,295 --> 01:32:45,081 ♪ Or will you be ignoring 1577 01:32:45,124 --> 01:32:50,086 ♪ The things I say 1578 01:32:51,087 --> 01:32:54,046 ♪ Oh, I wish there were 1579 01:32:54,090 --> 01:33:01,532 ♪ Something pat that I could run up and say to you now ♪ 1580 01:33:03,099 --> 01:33:09,366 ♪ But I get stuck and I don't know ♪ 1581 01:33:09,409 --> 01:33:14,414 ♪ How to say what I mean 1582 01:33:15,981 --> 01:33:20,507 ♪ You make me smile and laugh 1583 01:33:20,551 --> 01:33:22,901 ♪ Doesn't sound like much 1584 01:33:22,945 --> 01:33:26,992 ♪ But it's simple things 1585 01:33:27,036 --> 01:33:29,908 ♪ A look, a touch and I 1586 01:33:29,952 --> 01:33:35,522 ♪ Feel so warm I feel so right inside ♪ 1587 01:33:35,566 --> 01:33:42,355 ♪ You bring me out and I don't have to hide ♪ 1588 01:33:42,399 --> 01:33:47,404 ♪ Anymore 1589 01:33:48,884 --> 01:33:51,016 ♪ Anymore 1590 01:33:51,060 --> 01:33:55,151 ♪ You make me smile and laugh 1591 01:33:55,194 --> 01:33:58,023 ♪ Doesn't sound like much 1592 01:33:58,067 --> 01:34:01,940 ♪ But it's simple things 1593 01:34:01,984 --> 01:34:04,813 ♪ A look, a touch and I 1594 01:34:04,856 --> 01:34:09,252 ♪ Feel so warm I feel so right inside ♪ 110489