Original subtitles

♪♪

(THUNDER CRASHING)

♪ Sometimes some crimes

♪ Go slippin' through the cracks

♪ But these two gumshoes

♪ Are pickin' up the slack

♪ There's no case too big, no case too small

♪ When you need help, just call

♪ Ch-Ch-Ch-Chip 'n Dale's

♪ Rescue Rangers

♪ Ch-Ch-Ch-Chip 'n Dale

♪ When there's danger

♪ No, no, it never fails

♪ Once they're involved

♪ Somehow whatever's wrong gets solved

♪ Ch-Ch-Ch-Chip 'n Dale

♪ Rescue Rangers

♪ Ch-Ch-Ch-Chip 'n Dale

♪ When there's danger

♪ No, no, it never fails

♪ They'll take the clues

♪ And find the wheres and whys and whos

♪ Ch-Ch-Ch-Chip 'n Dale

♪ Rescue Rangers

♪ Ch-Ch-Ch-Chip 'n Dale

♪ When there's danger

♪ Ch-Ch-Ch-Chip 'n Dale ♪

NARRATOR: Previously on Chip 'n Dale's Rescue Rangers.

BOTH: Uh-oh.

Take a moment to appreciate it, gentlemen.

I got the ruby and Drake got the blame.

This beauty is going to the Professor.

He and I have much bigger plans for it.

MOLE: Isn't Mr. Klordane gonna be mad

when he finds the ruby missing?

FAT CAT: Klordane will have his ruby back after I've had my fun.

You've ruined my plans!

And what are you going to do about it, fish-breath?

(GASPING) Run!

Guess old Monterey Jack was too much for them!

(SQUEAKING)

CHIP: Maybe playing detectives wasn't such a good idea after all!

CHIP: Oh, no. We've got to stop the ship.

(GASPS)

(BOTH GRUNTING)

(SQUEAKING)

I know, I know, but it's jammed tight.

We can't slow down.

Then you boys step aside

and let old Monterey Jack have a whack at it.

See? I un-jammed that doohickey for you.

But you un-jammed it the wrong way.

Oops.

We're gonna hit.

Yeah. Like a ton of bricks.

(ALL SCREAMING)

That ride almost beats the time

I rode a walrus over Niagara Falls.

Are you crazy?

The walrus thought so.

Dale. Dale. Wake up.

No, Mommy, I don't wanna go to school today.

Snap out of it. We've got to find Fat Cat and get that ruby back.

Right, Chipper.

Yeah, right.

(SQUEAKING) Right.

You guys are coming along?

You betcha!

That flat-faced, flabby-furred feline submarined our house.

Me and Zipper got a score to settle with him.

(SQUEAKING)

Uh, okay. Follow us.

(SIGHING) That's three times

those rodents have pushed their pointy noses into my business.

How dare they try to take my ruby?

But, boss, isn't it actually Mr. Klordane's ruby?

(GASPING) I forgot. I have to get it back before he misses it.

Paddle. Stroke. Mush. Whatever.

DALE: Say, there's that Klordane guy.

Do you think maybe Fat Cat gave him back the ruby?

Does that answer your question?

Quick. We gotta stop him.

Leave that furball to me, Chipper.

I've got to get this ruby back.

Hold it right there, tuna-breath.

Come on, Monterey.

(WOOZILY) Right with you.

Once Professor Nimnul has the ruby,

we can begin Phase 2 of my plan.

Right, Mr. Klordane. The trains are all set.

(LAUGHING)

You might say the plan's right on track.

(PERCY LAUGHING)

Oh, kitty. You've decided to join me.

We gotta get on that helicopter.

If there are any problems, radio me at Glacier Bay.

(PANTING)

There goes the ruby.

CHIP: And any hope of clearing Detective Drake.

Buck up, boyos.

I know how we can fly after them.

(GRUNTING) What in creation is...

Nervous about flying, are we?

That's silly.

It's a splendid way to travel.

Especially when you're on your way

to commit the crime of the millennium.

But first, I must reach out and torture someone.

(LAUGHING)

(PHONE RINGING)

Fifth Precinct, Spinelli.

Um, well, we... we don't usually...

But I...

(SPEAKING IN FEMALE TONE) But I heard Detective Drake was in trouble.

I'm his old friend, Ruby.

Well, I don't suppose it would hurt.

Just a moment.

Dash it all. Chip and Dale should have reported back by now.

(GRUNTING)

Oh, I'm afraid the assignment was too big for them.

(DOOR OPENING)

Call for you, Drake.

Somebody named, uh, Ruby.

She sounds gorgeous.

I don't know any Ruby. Drake here.

Why, this is your dear old Ruby.

(HOARSELY) You know, the one I've stolen and you've taken the rap for.

(LAUGHING)

I'm calling to say thanks and so long, sucker.

You slimebag.

You won't get away with this.

Don. What are you doing?

That was Klordane. He's alive. This was all a setup.

Don't you see, Spinelli? That maniac is a-loose.

They gotta let me out of here. Get the key.

Get the key, Spinelli. I'm gonna kill him, I swear to God.

I never thought I'd see Donald Drake crack.

(DRAKE MUTTERING)

Just great.

There isn't a single flight to Glacier Bay.

Now what do we do, Monty?

Monty? Dale?

(SQUEAKING)

First rule of adventurin' is to always grab a bite when you can,

'cause you never know when you'll get your next meal.

Oh, I like that rule.

I remember foragin' for tree fungus once back in the...

(MONTEREY GASPS)

Gosh, Monterey, are you okay?

Cheese.

Monty. W-What's wrong?

(SCREAMING) A rat.

(SLURPING)

(SIGHING)

Cheese.

- (PEOPLE CLAMORING) - Uh-oh.

WOMAN: Oh, that's terrible.

Hey, where have you two been?

Better run for it, Chipper.

Run? Why?

(FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING)

MAN: Take that, you rat.

Just what did you think you were doing back there?

Oh, nothin' to worry about.

Sometimes I sort of have these, uh, cheese attacks, is all.

(SQUEAKING) Sometimes?

Well, most times, I guess.

(SQUEAKING) Oh!

All right, all the time.

I just can't help myself.

When there's a hint of cheddar in the air,

somethin' inside me snaps.

Yeah, his brain.

And this is the guy we're counting on to get us to Glacier Bay.

Oh, not me, Chipper.

I'm takin' you to an old pal of mine.

That's his place over there.

Geegaw Hackwrench,

the greatest pilot in aviation history.

He could set a plane down on a polar bear's nose

in the middle of a blizzard.

DALE: Wowie. He's that good?

You bet your tailwind, Dale.

He's got more flyin' time than a whole herd of geese.

Old Geegaw's helped me on a bushel of adventures.

(GRUNTS)

Adventures? Hot diggity.

Yeah, Geegaw's sure to help us out.

Providin' he's not still mad at me about Zanzibar.

Zanzibar?

What do you mean, mad at you?

What happened in Zanzibar?

Oh, don't give it another thought, Chipper.

I'm sure old Geegaw's forgotten all about the cheese bread.

Then again...

(CHIP MUTTERING)

Hang on, Chip. I'll get you out.

(CHITTERING)

He obviously has not forgotten about Zanzibar.

Now, don't jump to conclusions, Chip-o.

Uh, maybe he just hates door-to-door salesmen.

You can say that again. Look.

Crikey. When did he put all of this in?

One wrong step

and you'll trigger a veritable cornucopia of death and destruction.

CHIP: This is going to be tricky.

Now, follow me and step very, very carefully.

Uh-oh.

(SQUEAKING)

Uh, Monty, I think we should go back and leave, okay?

Leave? Why?

We're already halfway there.

Cheese.

Don't let him go.

(GASPING)

Cheese.

Mmm.

Nice of Geegaw to leave us an appetizer.

(SMACKING LIPS)

CHIP: Th-That's not all he left.

Don't do it, Geegaw.

Is this how he treats his friends?

Wait. It's your old pal, Monterey Jack.

(ALL SCREAMING)

Listen, Geegaw, I'm sorry.

GADGET: Monterey.

Golly. Have I ever missed you.

BOTH: That's Geegaw Hackwrench?

(MUMBLING)

No. Uh, it's, uh...

It's me, Gadget.

Gadget? Geegaw's little girl?

Why, the last time I saw you, you were knee-high to a knee.

Well, I've grown up some.

- I'll say. - And how.

Hi, there. I'm Gadget.

Oh, you know that already.

Hmm. What comes next? Oh, what's your name?

Uh, I'm Chip.

And I'm Dale.

Pleased to meet you.

Say, you're not salesmen, are you?

- Uh, no. - No.

Oh, good. That's why I built all those traps.

I think young Gadget's elevator doesn't go to the top floor.

You made all this stuff?

Oh, sure.

See, I've got this mind-bashingly high IQ

and I get bored easily,

so I invent all sorts of things out of spare parts.

Wanna see my sprocket collection?

Uh, no, that's all right, Gadget.

Actually, we're lookin' for your dad.

Um, he's not here.

Oh. When is he gonna get back?

(GRUNTS)

He's not coming back.

I lost him over a year ago.

Sorry, Gadget.

Old Geegaw was one of the best.

He'll be missed.

He already is.

Oh, excuse me. You're all standing.

Here, let me make you a chair.

That's okay, Gadget, love. Don't go to the trouble.

Oh, no trouble. It'll only take a second.

I guess we'll just have to find another way to get to Glacier Bay.

It's a shame.

And I was countin' on flyin' in the old Screamin' Eagle again.

Oh, Dad's plane is still here.

Well, actually, it's up there.

CHIP AND DALE: Wow.

GADGET: It was an experimental model from the Ultra-Flight Laboratories.

MONTEREY: The Screamin' Eagle. Coo! What a sight.

Oh, I remember the times me and Geegaw had in this joey.

Solid as an armadillo's backside.

Oh, that reminds me.

Dad said he wanted you to have it.

Honest?

Zowie. Guns and everything.

Now we'll get to Glacier Bay in no time.

Uh, you do know how to fly, don't you?

Not precisely,

but I went up with Geegaw enough times to get the hang of it.

(THUDDING)

MONTEREY: Um, maybe I could use a refresher course.

(SIGHING)

Oh, I forgot to mention, I made a few modifications.

Modifications?

Don't you just love ejection seats?

Now how are we gonna fly the plane?

Hey, I know. I'll do it.

Now, in 20 seconds,

the dynamite will go off and launch us right up this ramp.

Um, through the skylight?

The skylight? Oh, silly me. I forgot to open it.

What?

Now, where's that switch?

MONTEREY: Ten. Nine.

Uh, Gadget.

There. Oops. Eight.

Help. I want out. Let me out. Seven. Six.

- MONTEREY: Five. - Let me out.

Four. Three.

Oh, that's right. Dad was left-handed.

MONTEREY: Two. One.

(ALL SCREAMING)

Golly, that was close.

You can sit up now.

No, I was wrong. Better duck back down.

(ALL SCREAMING)

Mama.

(GASPING) I can't believe it. I'm all here.

And little Zipper, too.

Hitching a ride on an airliner was a swell idea, Gadget.

Although it might have been nice to have a little warnin'.

Hey. Lookit there.

What do you think those things are?

They're a place to start looking for clues.

Can you land us there, Gadget?

Roger Wilbury.

GADGET: Well, everyone, welcome to Glacier Bay.

(TIRES SQUEALING)

Beautiful touchdown, Gadget.

Light as a feather. Ha!

Just like your dad.

You really think so, Monty?

Too right.

'Course, when Geegaw landed on ice,

he usually used skis instead of wheels.

Skis? I knew I forgot something.

Hang on.

(GASPS)

Dale. Are you all right?

(IMITATING SANTA CLAUS LAUGHING)

Ouch!

Oh, cheer up, Gadget.

There's one good thing about a landing like this.

You can only do it once.

(SHIVERING)

GADGET: No, I'm sorry, Monterey,

but I think you should know I'm extraordinarily depressed.

Can't you see?

No matter what I do, I'll never be as good as my father was.

You need Geegaw Hackwrench, not Gadget.

Oh, gee, Gadget,

buck up.

It's not the end of the world,

just, uh, the end of the plane.

Dad never would have crashed it.

But that's the point, Gadget.

Your father was a flyer.

You're an inventor.

And that's what we need now, an inventor.

You do? Golly, you're right.

Why, I'll have this plane shipshape in no time.

Well, actually, it should be planeshape, shouldn't it?

That-a-girl.

Thank you, everybody.

Right. Now the rest of us can go get that ruby.

Hang on. If you wait a second, I can save you a walk.

I have schedules to meet, Professor.

Isn't it ready yet?

Really, Mr. Klordane, you must be patient.

True genius cannot be rushed.

Hurried, hastened and sped up, yes.

Anyway, it's ready for the ruby.

At last, I can complete my devious creation,

the Klordane Cannon-Laser 13.

Yours? I, Professor Norton Nimnul,

am the devious genius around here,

and I have great plans for the Nimnul Cannon-Laser 13.

I remind you, Professor, that without my ruby,

your precious laser is just a big, overgrown flashlight.

Big and overgrown? Yes, that's just what it is.

Now, get started.

(ALL LAUGHING)

I've gotta hand it to that Gadget.

This iceboat handles like a dream.

Sturdy, too.

What's taking so long?

(MOCKING) "What's taking so long?"

I just have to calibrate the ruby.

(HUMMING)

Ah! Perfect pitch.

How are we gonna get the ruby now?

We'll sneak in and take it.

That's if you can reach it.

Come on, baby.

One small step for a machine, one giant leap for evil scientists.

That-a-girl.

Now, let's show them what you've got.

Blimey, what's that loony up to?

How's that for an overgrown flashlight?

Excellent, Professor. But will it fly?

Will it fly? You just watch.

Fly? Now what's he talkin' about?

(LAUGHING)

(SHUDDERING) What's going on?

Yes. Yes.

They'll never laugh at Norton Nimnul again.

I don't believe it.

MONTEREY: Yeah, the world's largest ice cube.

DALE: Boy, think how many snow cones you could make from that.

Well, Professor Nimnul, it looks like

you've earned your keep after all.

Now's our chance, while the laser's on the ground.

KLORDANE: I trust you'll see that the glacier is delivered on schedule?

A simple matter for a super-genius like myself, Mr. Klordane.

Just keep on your toes.

I'm not paying you to get overconfident.

(FAT CAT YOWLING) Oh, by the way, I'm going to leave my cat with you.

At least there'll be someone with intelligence guarding my laser.

Oh, what a nice little kitty.

(FAT CAT GROWLING)

(CHOMPING)

Now that I have my laser and my ice,

it's time for Phase 3 of my master plan.

Ta-ta.

His laser?

Oh, don't worry, baby.

Professor Nimnul won't let him put his nasty hands on you.

(GASPING) There are rodents on my laser.

Get off. Get off.

If I get any colder, I'll need a heating pad just to freeze.

You're a cat. Rodents are your department.

That idiot.

No one uses Fat Cat as a common mouser.

But in this case, I'll make an exception.

They're onto us now, mates. Grab that ruby and let's run.

(ALL SCREAMING)

(ALL GASPING)

I've faced tougher odds and never lost me head.

But you mates are sure puttin' a strain on me tail.

Oh, good. I was afraid you'd left.

I just wanted to say

it's been nice snowing you.

(ALL GASPING)

(NARRATOR SPEAKING)