All language subtitles for The Flintstones S01E04 No Help Wanted 1080p HMAX WEB-DL DDP2 0 H 264-PHOENiX_track3_[eng]

[drum roll]

[whirring]

thud thud

Oh, no.

No, no, no, no, no.

And I made it double or nothing. Oh, no.

[crying]

[chuckles]

Flintstone's a good winner

but he's certainly a poor looser.

[theme music]

[blows whistle]

screech

[siren wailing]

[blows whistle]

vroom

screech

[music continues]

screech

vroom

screech

crash

thud

slam

mwah

[scatting]

Here comes Fred home from work, Dino.

Come on, boy. Come on, greet your daddy. He's home.

[barking]

[panting]

[Dino barking]

[panting]

[barking]

No, no, Dino! No, hold it, boy! Hold it.

Oh! Oh!

thud

[laughing]

slurp slurp slurp

Not now. Stop it, Dino.

[laughing]

Stop it!

You hear that, Dino, stop it.

[laughing continues]

Hi, Fred. Dino sure gave you the big welcome tonight.

What do you mean, tonight?

Dino gives me a big welcome every night. Don't you, boy?

[barking]

[panting]

[Fred laughs]

Dinner ready, sweetheart?

In a minute, Fred. Go sit down.

You know, Wilma, I've been feeling

wonderful this past week.

Must be because I haven't seen

that ungrateful neighbor of ours, Barney Rubble.

Ungrateful? How come?

I'll tell you how come.

I figured that Barney wasn't getting paid enough.

So last week I went to see his boss.

I told him I was Barney's agent.

'And, boy, did I lay it on the line.'

Laid what on the line, Fred?

I told him I was collective bargaining for Barney.

'And unless Barney collected'

a lot of retroactive pay

the bargain was over.

Then I told Barney to put his broom down

and go see his boss.

And then what?

I haven't seen that ingrate Barney since.

He's probably living it up on that big fat raise I got him.

[Fred laughs]

'Who cares?'

To stop seeing him around is worth it.

It's water over the bridge.

Nothing could get me mad.

Not the way I feel. Nothing.

Wilma!

What's the idea? One smelt for dinner?

I thought nothing could get you mad, Fred.

Well, one measly smelt is nothing and I'm mad.

'I need nourishment. I'm a growing man.'

You're growing, alright. You're growing impossible.

'Oh, yeah?'

What happened to the dinosaur steak

I brought home last night?

Well, if you must know

I gave it to Betty and Barney.

Betty and Barney?

'That's right.'

So..

It isn't enough I get the guy more dough.

'He's got to sponge off my wife when my back is turned.'

I'm gonna go see that sponge

and squeeze his ungrateful head.

Fred, just a minute.

Get away from that door, Wilma.

My chivalry is getting thin.

And that's the only thing about you that is getting thin.

Now you listen to me, blabbermouth.

'The reason I gave him the steak is because'

'they haven't had a decent meal all week.'

They're too proud to ask for help.

But the truth is they're flat broke.

Broke? What's Barney doing with all that money I got him?

Are you kidding?

All you got him was a place in the unemployment line.

Huh?

After you got through

shooting off your big mouth

to Barney's boss, he fired Barney.

Gee.

I-I was only trying to help.

Well, you better think of something

that will help Barney or you'll be eating smelt all month.

Okay, Wilma, I'll, I'll-I'll think of something.

Gee.

Me and my big mouth.

knock knock knock

Who is it?

(Fred) 'It's me, Barney. Fred.'

Oh, uh, come on in, Fred.

Uh, uh, the door is open.

How about that guy?

He ain't even sore at me.

Uh, he-hello, Fred. H-how've you been?

Um, y-you're looking well, Fred.

H-h-hiya, Barney. B-Betty.

- Uh, long time no see. - Yeah.

[all chuckle]

Uh, why don't you boys go in the den?

'I'll fix some snacks.'

If I can find any.

gulp

Think nothing of it, Fred, I-I know you meant well

and besides, uh, it wasn't much of a job anyway.

Uh, thanks, Barney. You're a swell guy.

But I lost you a job and I'm gonna get you another.

Yeah? H-how, Fred?

'Well, uh, I gotta an influential friend'

'that could get you a job in a minute.'

No kidding?

It, uh, happens

I'm playing golf with him

tomorrow and you're coming along.

But I don't play golf, Fred.

You don't have to. We'll make it a threesome.

You can caddy, and that way he'll get to know you

and I'll needle him into giving you a job.

Gee, that sounds good. You think it'll work?

Barney, my boy, did I ever give you a bum steer?

- Well-- - Don't answer that, Barney.

Just meet me at the Gravel Beach Golf Course in the mornin'.

(Barney) 'Hey, it sure is a nice place, Fred.'

(Fred) 'Oh, it'll do.'

Now listen, Barney, this guy, Mr. Boulder

whose bag you're gonna carry

is my private golf pigeon.

'In the business world, very big.'

On the golf course, nothing.

We play every week.

Buck a hole and side bets.

- Can you afford it? - 'Of course I can't.'

But I never lose.

[both laughs]

'Now, now, be nice to him.'

You suggest what clubs to use and stuff like that, eh.

But, Fred, I don't know one club from another.

So much the better. For me.

[both laugh]

Well, mother, get the peanuts out

here comes my pigeon.

(Fred) 'Hiya, Mr. Boulder.'

Good morning, Flintstone. Nice day for golf.

Mr. Boulder, I want you to meet a friend of mine.

(Fred) 'This is Barney Rubble.'

Good morning, Rubble. And what's your handicap?

Well, uh, offhand, I'd say my biggest handicap

is living next door to Fred.

[both laugh]

(Mr. Boulder) 'I like a man with a sense of humor.'

'Don't you, Flintstone?'

Huh? Oh, oh, yeah.

[laughing sarcastically]

Hey, Rubble, Rubble, haven't we met before?

Southampton, Newport, Palm Beach?

Maybe the steam room at the Y?

The Gaiety Bowling Alley?

I'd better explain, Mr. Boulder.

Barney is going to caddy for you.

- 'He needs the money.' - Needs money?

I've heard of people like that, but never thought I'd meet one.

Oh, shucks, there're a lot of us like that, Mr. Boulder.

Yeah.

I lead such a rich, sheltered life.

[drum roll]

- Fore! - What does "fore" mean, Fred?

[chiming]

Don't ever do that!

- Sore head. - 'Quiet!'

[drum roll]

Hey, you got a good curve on it, Fred.

boing

swish swish swish

thud

(Barney) 'Wowie, what a shot, Fred.'

Right back on the tee where you started.

Here you are, Mr. Boulder.

This looks like a pretty good one.

A putter? To drive with?

Yeah, okay, you're the caddy.

'You know this game better than I do.'

[laughing]

Driving with a putter, yet.

Oh, boy, this is gonna be good.

swish

boing

A hole in one!

- Is that good, Fred? - You're a whiz, Rubble.

That's the first hole in one I ever shot.

(Mr. Boulder) 'And I did it with a putter, thanks to you.'

It looks like I'm winning a friend, huh, Fred?

You could still end up even. You're losing me.

[drum roll]

swish

Did you keep your eye on the ball, Fred?

Does that answer

your stupid question?

(Mr. Boulder) 'Hey, Rubble, what'll I do now?'

My ball's down here in this sand trap.

Uh, down in a sand trap.

Let's see, well, uh, try this, Mr. Boulder.

A driver?

[laughing]

A driver in a sand trap. Heh, heh, heh.

You wanna make it double or nothing, Mr. Boulder?

Okay, it's a bet.

[rumbles]

[whirring]

plop plop

Oh, no.

No, no, no, no, no.

And I made it double or nothing. Oh, no.

[crying]

[chuckles]

Flintstone's a good winner

but he's certainly a poor loser.

Well, like you always say, Flintstone

"It's not winning the game that counts

'it's collecting the dough."'

[Mr. Boulder laughs]

Fred, Fred, the job, the job.

Oh, oh, yeah, yeah, the job.

Uh, Mr. Boulder, could you somehow

'get Barney a job, anything at all?'

He's not too, uh, you know..

For Barney, anything.

Tell you what, Barney.

You go see this friend of mine, Rocky Stone.

Now, here's my card. The address is on the back.

And tell him I sent you.

(Barney) 'Oh! Gee, thanks, Mr. Boulder.'

Eh, Edgar, to you, Barney.

[laughs]

'Well, so long, loser. I'll see you next week.'

Yeah, yeah, so long, Mr. Boulder.

Uh, ta-ta, Edgar.

A hole in one. Double or nothing.

Hmm, boy, I was really in the groove today.

Well, he deserves to win at least once.

Only it sure puts me in a mess of sour pickles.

What do you mean, Fred?

The dough I lost was supposed to make

the delinquent payment on the TV set.

I don't dare tell Wilma.

Uh, Fred..

...I'm gonna go see about that job right away.

And-and thanks a lot for helping me.

Yeah, yeah. Good luck, Barney.

"Rocky Stone Inc."

Yep. This is the place.

[knocking on door]

Come in.

Um, Mr. Stone?

(Rocky Stone) 'Yes.'

'What's your complaint, buster?'

Oh, oh, no complaint, sir.

Uh, Mr. Boulder sent me down for a job.

Oh, Mr. Boulder. Well, come right in.

So you're a friend of Mr. Boulder, eh?

- Yeah. - Well, he's a great man.

Very big in the business world.

But I hear he's not so hot with the golf club.

Uh, yes, sir, uh, he said

that-that you would give me a job.

Oh, and he is right, son. You've got a job.

I have? Gee, thanks, Mr. Stone.

Well, what'll I do?

Well, now, first, let me explain something.

'A lot of people think our business is cruel.'

'But they're wrong.'

You see that picture hanging on the wall?

Uh-huh.

(Barney) 'Throwing people to the hungry lions.'

(Mr. Stone) 'Yeah, now, that's cruel, sir.'

You keep that picture in mind while you're doing your job.

- But what is my job? - Uh, look at the picture.

I am, I am.

You're going to repossess furniture.

- Repossess furniture? - Someone's got to do it.

Think of all the cheats who won't pay what they owe.

Think of how they laughed when we trusted them.

'How we took their word in good faith.'

Yeah.

Hey, they can't get away with it.

(Rocky Stone) 'Right!'

And here's your first assignment.

A real tough one.

Refuses to pay up on his TV set.

- Why, the welsher. - 'Right.'

Get the money or bring back the set.

Right.

Now, raise your right hand and read the oath.

Um..

"Neither rain nor snow, nor threats of tears

'"shall deter this collector'

from the completion of his contemptible duty."

It kind of gets you right here, doesn't it?

Kind of gets me right here.

Yeah, okay now. TV or not TV.

That's a gag we have in the trade.

[laughs]

[chuckles]

[sighs]

I'll start small. A TV set first.

And I'll work my way up to pianos

bedroom sets, houses.

Who knows?

Now, let's see where that deadbeat lives

who won't pay up on his TV set.

"Fredrick Flintstone

201 Cobblestone Lane."

Fr-Fred?

Oh, no. And he helped me get this job.

Oh, what will I do?

I just can't go in and take my best friend's TV.

And-and yet, I need this job.

Besides, I took the oath.

I pledged allegiance to the hungry lions.

I-I just can't fail on my first assignment.

Hey, maybe Fred can pay.

He always has some dough stashed away

for sweepstake tickets or somethin'.

[gun firing on TV]

(man on TV) 'They went that-a-way.'

- 'Which-a-way?' - 'That-a-way.'

Hi, Fred.

Oh, hello, Barney. Come on in. Pull up a chair.

You want to try some of this Sabretooth Tiger milk?

Uh, no, thanks, Fred.

Guy on TV recommends it for fallen arches.

I'm not sure if you're supposed to drink it

or soak your feet in it.

[Fred laughs]

Uh, you sure like your TV set, don't you, Fred?

You bet, I'd rather lose my right arm

than miss my TV programs.

Oh, I was afraid of that.

(Fred) 'Hey! Hey, look'

here comes the fellow with the stiff leg

that helps the sheriff out.

Speaking of sheriffs, uh..

...did you make that delinquent payment on the TV set yet?

Are you kidding?

I lost that money to Mr. Boulder

trying to help you get a job.

Yeah, I know, Fred, and I appreciate it.

But you must have a few bucks

stashed away in your bowlin' ball bag?

Quiet, you fathead.

You want Wilma to hear you?

'Now knock it off about my financial rating.'

Don't you have any money, Fred?

What is this? Am I on a witness stand?

'Who do you think you are? Perry Gunite or something?'

I'm broke.

B-R-O-K, broke.

'Now shut up about me.'

Let's talk about you.

Did you get the job Mr. Boulder sent you to see about?

Yeah, yeah, I got it.

Well, you don't seem too happy about it.

I'm not. I'm quitting.

Quitting? Oh, no, you're not.

You want me to get in bad with Mr. Boulder?

'What's the matter with the job?'

I don't know. It, uh, it goes against my grain.

(Fred) 'Look who's got a grain.'

'You see this?'

'How would you like those knuckles to rub up'

'against the grain of your wooden head?'

- Oh! Fred. - 'Oh! Fred, nothing.'

What could be wrong with a job you had for an hour?

I would have to do something ruthless, Fred.

So what? In business you got to be ruthless.

You gotta use every trick in the book.

When fighting fair don't work, fight dirty.

But, but how about friendship, Fred?

'Friendship? Ah..'

Your only friend is a buck.

And the more bucks you got

the more friends you got.

'You are a soldier in the business army now.'

Your boss is your commander.

When he says, "charge," you charge!

Trample the enemy or be trampled!

You do whatever your job calls for.

- 'That's your duty.' - Yes, sir.

And thanks for the advice, Fred.

For a guy that digs ditches

you sure know the business world.

Just a minute, Barney. Let me open the door for you.

Thanks, Fred. Thanks for everything.

[laughs]

Oh, that Barney is like putty in my hands.

Now, let's see. There's a fight on Channel 15.

Hey, Barney!

Barney, are you nuts?

Where are you going with my TV set?

I'm repossessing it, Fred. That's my new job.

Your job? Taking my TV set?

Yeah, Fred. You told me to be ruthless, remember?

Ruthless?

You bring this set back or you'll be toothless.

Fred, what are you and Barney doing with our TV set?

Uh, uh, nothin', nothing, Wilma. Nothing.

We're airing out the aerial, like.

Put it back.

I want no fooling around with that set now that it's paid for.

Paid for.

Okay, Wilma. We got it back.

And as for you

out of my house, you Benedict Whosis.

But, Fred, I'm in the business army now.

(Fred) 'Okay, soldier, retreat!'

screech

Or they'll be blowing taps for you.

Business army, huh?

Hmm, well.

Since an army travels on its stomach

a nice sandwich would be in order.

And, uh, I'll try some more of that

Sabretooth Tiger milk, too.

♪ Dada-de-bababuu ♪

♪ Ba-ba-bum ♪

Here's my chance.

♪ Hu-baba-boo daba-doo-di-do ♪

Uh-oh, here comes Fred.

I better hide or he'll skin me alive.

♪ Bababa-boo-boo-bababa-boo ♪

[grunts]

Now how did that get here?

I could've sworn I put it on the stand.

'Nope, I didn't.'

'Barney's got me so upset'

I can't remember what I'm doing.

Nothing wrong with my muscles, though.

This set feels light as a feather.

Yeah, now it's back where it should be.

I hope it's working after all that hassling around.

click

Do you have trouble sleeping at night?

It may be because you're a deadbeat.

Pay up those annoying TV bills

with one big payment

and get a good night's sleep.

Alright, wise guy.

Get out of my set!

(Barney) I gotta take it back, Fred.

Okay, Barney.

I'll get you out the hard way

even if I have to wreck this set.

(Barney) 'It's my duty, Fred. So long.'

Hey, come back here, Barney!

screech

Hey kid, did you see a TV set

run past here?

A TV set running?

Never mind, kid. I see it.

Huh! The more I see of grown-ups

the more I want to stay being a wittle kid.

(Fred) 'Come back here, you double-crosser.'

Give me back my set!

Come on, Barney. Where are you hiding?

Ahem, uh, any particular model you're looking for?

Yeah, one with human legs.

Oh! What a business.

I try to keep a big stock.

The customers always want something else.

[sobbing]

- Ah-hah! There you are! - Huh?

Wait till I get my hands on you.

Well, what do you know? I had one.

I got a bigger stock than I thought.

(Barney) 'Listen to reason, Fred.'

boing

(Fred) 'Got you! Now get out of that set!'

bam bam bam

I got a good mind to smack you on the schnozzola.

(Wilma) 'Fred!'

What are you doing downtown with our TV set?

Uh, well, I-I..

That is, you see..

Oh! Shucks. Tell her the whole story, Barney.

- You mean the truth? - 'Yeah, I give up.'

Go ahead, Barney. I'm listening.

And that's the whole story, Wilma.

Aren't you ashamed, Fred?

(Wilma) 'Taking it out on Barney when it's all your fault.'

Take the set back, Barney. It's your job.

- 'And no hard feelings.' - Gee, thanks, Wilma.

- No hard feelings, Fred? - Yeah.

And as for you, playboy golfer

you are coming with me so I can keep an eye on you.

I still say that Barney is a false friend.

It's like that old proverb.

"He who steals my TV

steals all."

crash

'Wilma.'

My TV. It's back.

It came home. Ha-ha.

It is home.

(Wilma) 'Here's a note for you, Fred.'

(Fred) 'What does it say?'

"Dear Fred

"I got an advance on my first week's salary

"and paid your TV bill.

"Don't worry about returning the money.

I just don't want to lose your friendship."

Signed, Barney.

And that's your false friend, Fred.

Oh! That crazy guy.

- Hiya, Fred. - 'Barney. Hiya, pal.'

- No hard feelings, Fred? - Of course not, Barney.

Come on in. I'll fix you some Sabretooth Tiger milk.

Yeah, yeah, come on in, pal.

Fred, you understand I was, uh

uh, just doing my job?

I know, Barney, sure. And I apologize.

(Barney) 'I'm sure glad you feel that way, Fred.'

Because when I went back to the office

they gave me another memo on you.

Something about an overdue payment on your golf clubs.

It sure is nice to see the boys making up.

Out! Out! Out!

And don't ever come back!

bang bang

(Barney) 'Oh! Be reasonable, Fred. I got to take 'em back.'

Touch one golf club in my bag

and I'll mash your head in with a mashie.

(Barney) 'Oh! Come on, Fred. It's my job.'

'You told me to be ruthless.'

Well, they were friends for about five minutes.

And that's about par for the course.

[theme music]

[yawns]

[music continues]

clink clink

thud

slam

Wilma!

Wilma!

Come on, Wilma. Open this door.

Wilma!