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1
00:00:14,823 --> 00:00:16,085
What'd you do?
2
00:00:16,158 --> 00:00:17,250
What?
3
00:00:17,325 --> 00:00:18,917
Don't give me that.
What'd you do?
4
00:00:18,994 --> 00:00:19,961
Nothing.
5
00:00:20,028 --> 00:00:21,620
Mom, I'm trying to study.
6
00:00:21,696 --> 00:00:23,095
Oh.
7
00:00:23,165 --> 00:00:26,601
I'm sure you don't mind
if I, uh...
8
00:00:26,668 --> 00:00:27,726
took a look in here!
9
00:00:29,271 --> 00:00:30,704
Mom, I'm telling you.
10
00:00:30,772 --> 00:00:32,137
We didn't do anything.
11
00:00:32,207 --> 00:00:33,674
Oh, you boys are up
to something.
12
00:00:33,742 --> 00:00:35,141
I can smell it.
13
00:00:37,012 --> 00:00:39,071
If you've broken another window,
14
00:00:39,147 --> 00:00:41,411
it is going to come out of your...
15
00:00:42,817 --> 00:00:43,784
Are you done?
16
00:00:43,852 --> 00:00:45,114
You want to frisk me?
17
00:00:45,187 --> 00:00:48,714
You just consider yourselves lucky...
18
00:00:48,790 --> 00:00:50,621
this time.
19
00:01:06,908 --> 00:01:08,569
That was close.
20
00:01:08,643 --> 00:01:12,170
Either she's losing her touch,
or we're getting better.
21
00:01:12,247 --> 00:01:15,808
Yes, no, maybe
22
00:01:15,884 --> 00:01:18,682
I don't know
23
00:01:18,753 --> 00:01:21,881
Can you repeat the question?
24
00:01:21,957 --> 00:01:23,652
You're not the boss of me now
25
00:01:23,725 --> 00:01:26,956
And you're not so big
26
00:01:27,028 --> 00:01:29,087
You're not the boss of me now
27
00:01:29,164 --> 00:01:31,598
You're not the boss of me now
28
00:01:31,666 --> 00:01:33,566
You're not the boss of me now
29
00:01:33,635 --> 00:01:37,435
And you're not so big
30
00:01:37,505 --> 00:01:40,804
Life is unfair
31
00:01:42,644 --> 00:01:44,407
The good thing about being smart...
32
00:01:44,479 --> 00:01:47,004
is I never have to look up
any phone numbers.
33
00:01:47,082 --> 00:01:49,448
The bad thing is
no one else in the family...
34
00:01:49,517 --> 00:01:51,417
ever bothers to remember anything.
35
00:01:51,486 --> 00:01:53,511
Hey, Francis,
you told me to remind you...
36
00:01:53,588 --> 00:01:55,453
about Mom and Dad's anniversary.
37
00:01:55,523 --> 00:01:57,423
Ah, great. When is it?
38
00:01:57,492 --> 00:01:58,254
Today.
39
00:01:58,326 --> 00:02:00,521
Dude, you're supposed to
remind me before...
40
00:02:00,595 --> 00:02:02,290
so that I can get them something.
41
00:02:02,364 --> 00:02:04,832
That's okay.
We'll put your name on their gift.
42
00:02:04,899 --> 00:02:06,867
Cool. Thanks. I owe you one.
43
00:02:06,935 --> 00:02:08,368
No. You owe me 20.
44
00:02:08,436 --> 00:02:10,301
That's what your share comes to.
45
00:02:10,372 --> 00:02:11,805
You got them an $80 gift?
46
00:02:11,873 --> 00:02:12,805
Uh...
47
00:02:12,874 --> 00:02:14,774
yeah.
48
00:02:23,218 --> 00:02:24,276
Oh, Craig.
49
00:02:24,352 --> 00:02:25,478
Happy anniversary.
50
00:02:25,553 --> 00:02:28,420
16 wonderful years to the same man.
51
00:02:28,490 --> 00:02:30,788
That Hal is one lucky hombre.
52
00:02:30,859 --> 00:02:32,019
You shouldn't have.
53
00:02:32,093 --> 00:02:33,025
Oh, please.
54
00:02:33,094 --> 00:02:35,790
A special gift for a special lady...
55
00:02:35,864 --> 00:02:37,331
on a special day.
56
00:02:37,399 --> 00:02:39,299
No. I mean, really,
you shouldn't have.
57
00:02:39,367 --> 00:02:41,460
Aren't only husbands
supposed to give gifts?
58
00:02:41,536 --> 00:02:43,834
Fine.
Throw it in the trash, then.
59
00:02:43,905 --> 00:02:44,929
Ho-ho-hold on.
60
00:02:45,006 --> 00:02:47,031
Let's see what it is first.
61
00:02:47,108 --> 00:02:48,302
Oh, look at...
62
00:02:48,376 --> 00:02:51,038
- I've been meaning to try this color.
- I know.
63
00:02:51,112 --> 00:02:52,909
I saw you eyeing it
a couple weeks ago.
64
00:02:52,981 --> 00:02:54,573
I didn't know
we carried this brand.
65
00:02:54,649 --> 00:02:55,581
We don't.
66
00:02:55,650 --> 00:02:57,242
So where did you see me...?
67
00:02:57,319 --> 00:02:58,411
So, big plans for tonight?
68
00:02:58,486 --> 00:03:01,046
What are you going
to be wearing?
69
00:03:01,122 --> 00:03:03,716
Oh, it's going to be great.
I have the most perfect red dress.
70
00:03:03,792 --> 00:03:05,350
Took me two months
to save up for it,
71
00:03:05,427 --> 00:03:06,758
but it was worth it.
72
00:03:06,828 --> 00:03:10,992
Oh, I've been fantasizing
about this night forever.
73
00:03:24,079 --> 00:03:25,910
[Sighing]
74
00:03:47,402 --> 00:03:48,630
Craig?
75
00:03:48,703 --> 00:03:50,864
Huh? Yeah, uh, say, Lois,
76
00:03:50,939 --> 00:03:51,997
you, uh,
77
00:03:52,073 --> 00:03:54,303
you want to catch a movie
or something over lunch?
78
00:03:54,376 --> 00:03:57,311
They're playing My Best Friend's Wedding
over in Electronics.
79
00:03:57,379 --> 00:03:59,506
- No, thanks. L...
- Fine. Forget it.
80
00:03:59,581 --> 00:04:01,742
Oof.
81
00:04:01,816 --> 00:04:03,044
[Groaning]
82
00:04:03,118 --> 00:04:04,176
I'm okay.
83
00:04:06,054 --> 00:04:08,614
Are you boys almost finished
wrapping our present?
84
00:04:08,690 --> 00:04:10,123
I have to meet your father...
85
00:04:10,191 --> 00:04:12,091
at the restaurant in ten minutes.
86
00:04:12,160 --> 00:04:13,991
More paper.
87
00:04:14,062 --> 00:04:15,620
I get to do the bow.
88
00:04:15,697 --> 00:04:17,995
Why'd she give you
the money to buy the gift?
89
00:04:18,066 --> 00:04:20,296
Because she didn't want
another karate video.
90
00:04:20,368 --> 00:04:21,300
It's ka-ra-te.
91
00:04:21,369 --> 00:04:22,802
I get to do the bow.
92
00:04:22,871 --> 00:04:24,099
What did we get them anyway?
93
00:04:24,172 --> 00:04:25,104
Picture frame.
94
00:04:25,173 --> 00:04:26,105
Brownnoser.
95
00:04:26,174 --> 00:04:27,801
I get to do the bow.
96
00:04:27,876 --> 00:04:29,138
We're not finished yet.
97
00:04:29,210 --> 00:04:31,405
Yeah, but I get to do the bow.
98
00:04:54,836 --> 00:04:56,098
Finished.
99
00:04:56,171 --> 00:04:58,105
Finally.
100
00:04:58,173 --> 00:05:01,006
No! I was supposed
to do the bow.
101
00:05:01,075 --> 00:05:02,303
You should have said something.
102
00:05:02,377 --> 00:05:03,309
I'm telling.
103
00:05:03,378 --> 00:05:05,869
Mom!
104
00:05:05,947 --> 00:05:07,881
No!
105
00:05:07,949 --> 00:05:10,042
Fire?
106
00:05:11,352 --> 00:05:12,284
Fire?
107
00:05:12,353 --> 00:05:14,378
Fire?!
108
00:05:14,456 --> 00:05:15,388
Mom! What...?
109
00:05:15,457 --> 00:05:19,416
This is the most stupid, irresponsible,
dangerous thing you have ever done.
110
00:05:19,494 --> 00:05:21,689
Is this what you want?
111
00:05:21,763 --> 00:05:23,890
Will we have to identify
your charred little bodies...
112
00:05:23,965 --> 00:05:26,297
through their dental records?
113
00:05:26,367 --> 00:05:28,198
I want a straight answer.
114
00:05:28,269 --> 00:05:29,258
Who did this?
115
00:05:29,337 --> 00:05:30,269
Malcolm did it.
116
00:05:30,338 --> 00:05:31,270
Reese did it.
117
00:05:31,339 --> 00:05:33,273
- I didn't do it!
- I didn't do it!
118
00:05:33,341 --> 00:05:36,174
We're going to the dentist?
119
00:05:37,412 --> 00:05:38,970
Who?
120
00:05:42,050 --> 00:05:43,483
I don't like that one anyway.
121
00:05:46,921 --> 00:05:48,650
No. No. Not that one.
122
00:05:50,225 --> 00:05:52,318
They turn me down
They turn me down
123
00:05:52,393 --> 00:05:54,293
They turn, they turn
they turn, they turn
124
00:05:54,362 --> 00:05:55,989
They, they
they, they, they...
125
00:05:56,064 --> 00:05:57,497
Who?
126
00:05:57,565 --> 00:05:58,896
It wasn't me. It was him.
127
00:05:58,967 --> 00:06:00,059
No, it was...
128
00:06:00,134 --> 00:06:01,726
Okay. Into the hallway.
129
00:06:01,803 --> 00:06:03,293
Think I'm going to puke.
130
00:06:03,371 --> 00:06:05,862
Yeah? Well, it's going to be
the highlight of your evening,
131
00:06:05,940 --> 00:06:09,137
because nobody is going anywhere
until one of you tells me who.
132
00:06:09,210 --> 00:06:10,142
Everything's all set up?
133
00:06:10,211 --> 00:06:11,508
I believe so, sir.
134
00:06:13,715 --> 00:06:15,205
Table seven? Chateau Brut '87?
135
00:06:15,283 --> 00:06:16,511
Hors d'oeuvres medley?
136
00:06:16,584 --> 00:06:18,211
Yes, sir.
137
00:06:19,354 --> 00:06:22,118
Oh, geez, one more thing.
138
00:06:22,190 --> 00:06:23,214
I almost forgot.
139
00:06:23,291 --> 00:06:24,690
Uh, my wife always orders lobster,
140
00:06:24,759 --> 00:06:26,590
so could you have
the chef slip this...
141
00:06:26,661 --> 00:06:29,152
on the lobster's claw
just before you serve it?
142
00:06:29,230 --> 00:06:32,290
She gets such a kick
out of stuff like that.
143
00:06:32,367 --> 00:06:34,301
And so do I, for that matter.
144
00:06:34,369 --> 00:06:35,996
Not a problem, sir.
145
00:06:37,438 --> 00:06:39,633
The violinist has our song?
146
00:06:39,707 --> 00:06:41,766
He received the sheet music
this morning.
147
00:06:41,843 --> 00:06:44,607
Good.
Good, good, good, good.
148
00:06:44,679 --> 00:06:46,613
You would be surprised
how many times I've heard...
149
00:06:46,681 --> 00:06:49,548
"Tears of a Clown"
just butchered.
150
00:06:49,617 --> 00:06:50,549
Tell her.
151
00:06:50,618 --> 00:06:52,108
You tell her.
152
00:06:52,186 --> 00:06:53,118
Who?
153
00:06:53,187 --> 00:06:54,677
- Malcolm!
- Reese!
154
00:06:54,756 --> 00:06:56,280
Closer to the wall.
155
00:06:56,357 --> 00:06:58,348
Wait, Mom. Seriously.
156
00:06:58,426 --> 00:07:00,257
It reeks over here.
157
00:07:00,328 --> 00:07:01,556
I can't help it.
158
00:07:01,629 --> 00:07:04,598
Into the TV room. Let's go.
159
00:07:04,666 --> 00:07:08,898
Come on, come on
160
00:07:08,970 --> 00:07:13,168
Come on, come on
161
00:07:13,241 --> 00:07:16,267
Come on, come on
162
00:07:16,344 --> 00:07:17,606
Come on...
163
00:07:17,679 --> 00:07:20,443
I'll give you five dollars
if you tell Mom you did it.
164
00:07:20,515 --> 00:07:21,482
You tell her.
165
00:07:21,549 --> 00:07:23,176
You did it,
'cause I didn't do it.
166
00:07:23,251 --> 00:07:24,183
I really didn't.
167
00:07:24,252 --> 00:07:26,243
- What are you eating?
- Nothing.
168
00:07:26,321 --> 00:07:28,653
Why don't you guys shut up
so I can think of something?
169
00:07:28,723 --> 00:07:29,985
What's there to think of?
170
00:07:30,058 --> 00:07:31,548
There's nothing we can do.
171
00:07:31,626 --> 00:07:33,116
I've never seen Mom so mad.
172
00:07:33,194 --> 00:07:34,286
Me either.
173
00:07:34,362 --> 00:07:35,420
Reese is right.
174
00:07:35,496 --> 00:07:36,861
We're out of our league.
175
00:07:36,931 --> 00:07:38,193
There's only one person...
176
00:07:38,266 --> 00:07:40,826
who ever had Mom this mad
at them and survived.
177
00:07:42,403 --> 00:07:44,371
Hello.
178
00:07:44,439 --> 00:07:47,431
- She has your heads where?
- Under the couch.
179
00:07:47,508 --> 00:07:49,476
All because Reese
won't admit he did it.
180
00:07:49,544 --> 00:07:50,602
You admit it.
181
00:07:50,678 --> 00:07:51,474
I didn't do it.
182
00:07:51,546 --> 00:07:53,013
- Neither did I.
- Liar.
183
00:07:53,081 --> 00:07:55,811
Chill. You are not going to get anywhere
fighting with each other.
184
00:07:55,883 --> 00:07:57,942
First of all,
you all burned the dress.
185
00:07:58,019 --> 00:07:59,008
I didn't.
186
00:07:59,087 --> 00:08:00,019
Hey, you all did it.
187
00:08:00,088 --> 00:08:01,282
You have to stay together.
188
00:08:01,356 --> 00:08:02,482
You have to stay united.
189
00:08:02,557 --> 00:08:03,922
United against who?
190
00:08:03,992 --> 00:08:04,686
My mom.
191
00:08:04,759 --> 00:08:06,351
Nice.
192
00:08:06,427 --> 00:08:09,328
No one broke so far,
so you should be proud of yourselves.
193
00:08:09,397 --> 00:08:11,024
- Did she do the toy thing yet?
- Yep.
194
00:08:11,099 --> 00:08:12,464
- Spinning?
- Uh-uh.
195
00:08:12,533 --> 00:08:15,468
Okay. Good.
I think I know where she's going.
196
00:08:15,536 --> 00:08:16,867
Separate interviews.
197
00:08:16,938 --> 00:08:18,997
Listen, when she gets you alone,
198
00:08:19,073 --> 00:08:21,837
she's going to pretend
she's on your side.
199
00:08:21,909 --> 00:08:23,171
She's not.
200
00:08:23,244 --> 00:08:25,712
Go ahead.
201
00:08:25,780 --> 00:08:27,907
It's a name brand.
202
00:08:35,556 --> 00:08:36,921
I'm not mad at you.
203
00:08:36,991 --> 00:08:38,720
I know you didn't do this.
204
00:08:38,793 --> 00:08:39,919
You're a good boy.
205
00:08:39,994 --> 00:08:42,554
But I want you to help me
find out who did.
206
00:08:42,630 --> 00:08:44,063
This is serious.
207
00:08:44,132 --> 00:08:46,896
One of your brothers could have
burned the house down.
208
00:08:46,968 --> 00:08:49,664
And for that,
he will be severely punished.
209
00:08:49,737 --> 00:08:53,264
But the one who helps me
will be a very happy boy.
210
00:08:53,341 --> 00:08:55,935
And I want that to be you.
211
00:08:56,010 --> 00:08:59,377
'Cause you've always
been the best one.
212
00:08:59,447 --> 00:09:01,210
You've always been the best one.
213
00:09:01,282 --> 00:09:04,479
You have always been the best one.
214
00:09:04,552 --> 00:09:06,986
Mom, honestly,
I don't know who did it.
215
00:09:07,055 --> 00:09:07,987
I don't know.
216
00:09:08,056 --> 00:09:08,886
Don't know.
217
00:09:11,159 --> 00:09:13,286
Well, I guess you boys think...
218
00:09:13,361 --> 00:09:15,761
you've got your old mom
over a barrel, huh?
219
00:09:15,830 --> 00:09:17,661
Well, we'll just see about that.
220
00:09:17,732 --> 00:09:21,862
If you boys want to play,
221
00:09:21,936 --> 00:09:25,838
we can play all night long.
222
00:09:53,534 --> 00:09:54,660
Sir?
223
00:09:54,736 --> 00:09:55,668
Hmm? Oh.
224
00:09:55,737 --> 00:09:57,500
Thank you. Thank you.
225
00:09:57,572 --> 00:10:00,006
Oh, can I have another
vodka martini, please?
226
00:10:00,074 --> 00:10:01,268
Very good.
227
00:10:01,342 --> 00:10:04,140
This time,
let's go olive, onion, olive.
228
00:10:04,212 --> 00:10:05,179
Whatever.
229
00:10:08,316 --> 00:10:11,479
[Busy Signal]
230
00:10:14,122 --> 00:10:16,056
W-What's that?
I can't hear you.
231
00:10:16,124 --> 00:10:18,115
She's killing us!
232
00:10:18,192 --> 00:10:19,853
[Whimsical Laughter]
233
00:10:19,927 --> 00:10:22,896
* Nice is good, mean is bad *
234
00:10:22,964 --> 00:10:25,865
Don't be mean
'cause mean is bad
235
00:10:25,933 --> 00:10:28,060
Nice is better than mean
236
00:10:28,136 --> 00:10:30,969
- [Groaning]
- Hugs are good, thugs are bad
237
00:10:31,038 --> 00:10:34,599
Why does she have
to ruin everything I love?
238
00:10:34,675 --> 00:10:37,166
Francis, I'm just going
to tell her I did it.
239
00:10:37,245 --> 00:10:40,237
I know it wasn't me,
but anything is better than this.
240
00:10:40,314 --> 00:10:42,043
- Oh, go...
- ** [Music Over Phone]
241
00:10:42,116 --> 00:10:43,310
That's bad.
242
00:10:43,384 --> 00:10:45,648
They tried that psych-ops stuff
on Noriega.
243
00:10:45,720 --> 00:10:49,053
They said that by the end
he wanted to cut his own ears off.
244
00:10:49,123 --> 00:10:50,852
Malcolm, you cannot crack now.
245
00:10:50,925 --> 00:10:53,393
She will own you
for the rest of your life.
246
00:10:53,461 --> 00:10:55,019
Now, listen to me, Malcolm.
247
00:10:55,096 --> 00:10:57,121
You have to do
exactly what I say.
248
00:10:57,198 --> 00:10:59,530
Nice is good, mean is bad
249
00:10:59,600 --> 00:11:02,262
Don't be mean
'cause mean is bad
250
00:11:02,336 --> 00:11:04,395
Nice is better than mean
251
00:11:04,472 --> 00:11:05,404
Hugs are good
252
00:11:05,473 --> 00:11:07,407
Thugs are bad
253
00:11:07,475 --> 00:11:10,171
* Don't be a thug
'cause thugs are bad *
254
00:11:10,244 --> 00:11:13,008
Hugs are better than thugs
255
00:11:13,080 --> 00:11:14,672
- Smart is good...
- Did you see that?
256
00:11:14,749 --> 00:11:16,683
- Hooray!
- Francis is a genius!
257
00:11:16,751 --> 00:11:18,844
Come on! Sing louder!
258
00:11:18,920 --> 00:11:21,480
* Nice is good, mean is bad *
259
00:11:21,556 --> 00:11:23,990
* Don't be mean
'cause mean is bad *
260
00:11:24,058 --> 00:11:25,616
* Nice is better than... *
261
00:11:25,693 --> 00:11:27,285
Oh, your grandmother
and all your friends...
262
00:11:27,361 --> 00:11:30,159
are just going to love this
at your next birthday party.
263
00:11:31,332 --> 00:11:32,299
You're kidding me.
264
00:11:32,366 --> 00:11:33,731
Okay, just hang in there.
265
00:11:33,801 --> 00:11:35,234
Give me a minute to think.
266
00:11:35,303 --> 00:11:36,736
Damn, she's good.
267
00:11:36,804 --> 00:11:38,101
Did they crack?
268
00:11:38,172 --> 00:11:39,764
Nah, Dewey faked a stomach cramp.
269
00:11:39,841 --> 00:11:40,865
Bought them some time.
270
00:11:40,942 --> 00:11:42,102
Good man.
271
00:11:42,176 --> 00:11:44,508
Man, if we would have had
your mom in 'Nam,
272
00:11:44,579 --> 00:11:47,241
there'd be a McDonald's
in Hanoi Square right now.
273
00:11:47,315 --> 00:11:49,749
Dude, there is a McDonald's
in Hanoi Square.
274
00:11:49,817 --> 00:11:51,910
All right.
275
00:11:53,254 --> 00:11:55,222
[Busy Signal]
276
00:11:58,426 --> 00:12:00,257
Franklin, I'm ready to order.
277
00:12:00,328 --> 00:12:01,522
Are you sure, sir?
278
00:12:01,596 --> 00:12:04,429
Mm-hmm. You see,
in our family we have a saying.
279
00:12:04,498 --> 00:12:06,363
"After an hour, eat without her.
280
00:12:06,434 --> 00:12:08,868
If it's any longer,
something's wronger."
281
00:12:08,936 --> 00:12:10,335
Very catchy, sir.
282
00:12:10,404 --> 00:12:14,340
Well, when life gives you lemons
make lemonade, Franklin.
283
00:12:14,408 --> 00:12:16,137
Do you have any lemonade?
284
00:12:16,210 --> 00:12:17,142
No, sir.
285
00:12:17,211 --> 00:12:18,508
Oh. Do you have lemons?
286
00:12:18,579 --> 00:12:19,876
Yes, sir.
287
00:12:19,947 --> 00:12:23,508
Well, throw one in another martini
and let's hear those specials.
288
00:12:27,855 --> 00:12:29,755
[Reese]
What's she doing?
289
00:12:29,824 --> 00:12:31,052
Can't tell.
290
00:12:31,125 --> 00:12:32,057
Maybe she left.
291
00:12:32,126 --> 00:12:35,061
Yeah, I'm sure she's gone out
to buy us all presents.
292
00:12:35,129 --> 00:12:36,221
Hooray.
293
00:12:36,297 --> 00:12:38,492
It's just too quiet out there.
294
00:12:38,566 --> 00:12:40,193
It's driving me crazy.
295
00:12:40,268 --> 00:12:42,566
Maybe we should sing some more.
296
00:12:42,637 --> 00:12:43,934
Shut up, Dewey.
297
00:12:53,314 --> 00:12:56,044
I wonder how many holes
are up in those tiles.
298
00:12:56,117 --> 00:12:58,244
186,480.
299
00:12:58,319 --> 00:13:00,753
You counted all those?
300
00:13:00,821 --> 00:13:04,257
No, you just count one tile's holes
across and down.
301
00:13:04,325 --> 00:13:07,488
Multiply it, then multiply it
again by the number of tiles.
302
00:13:10,031 --> 00:13:12,329
You're doing that more and more.
303
00:13:12,400 --> 00:13:13,332
Doing what?
304
00:13:13,401 --> 00:13:14,834
That brain thing.
305
00:13:14,902 --> 00:13:18,633
Are you just going to keep
getting smarter and weirder?
306
00:13:18,706 --> 00:13:20,003
I don't know.
307
00:13:20,074 --> 00:13:22,599
Well, can you tone it down a little bit?
308
00:13:22,677 --> 00:13:24,736
'Cause I can't keep up
with all these butt-kickings.
309
00:13:24,812 --> 00:13:26,643
What are you talking about?
310
00:13:26,714 --> 00:13:29,478
Well, at least twice a day
I have to whoop-ass...
311
00:13:29,550 --> 00:13:31,484
on some kid calling you a weirdo.
312
00:13:31,552 --> 00:13:33,144
Honestly, it's exhausting.
313
00:13:33,220 --> 00:13:36,189
You beat up people
'cause they call me a weirdo?
314
00:13:36,257 --> 00:13:38,248
The last kid,
he was a freak anyways.
315
00:13:38,326 --> 00:13:40,692
He was in no position
to throw out names.
316
00:13:41,996 --> 00:13:42,792
Thanks.
317
00:13:42,863 --> 00:13:44,262
For what?
318
00:13:44,332 --> 00:13:47,301
Nothing.
319
00:13:49,904 --> 00:13:51,098
Hey.
320
00:13:51,172 --> 00:13:52,969
What am I thinking right now?
321
00:13:53,040 --> 00:13:55,031
I'm smart. I'm not psychic.
322
00:13:55,109 --> 00:13:58,169
Can you understand
what dogs are saying?
323
00:13:58,245 --> 00:13:59,303
No.
324
00:13:59,380 --> 00:14:00,438
I can.
325
00:14:00,514 --> 00:14:01,572
[Mom]
Oh, boys
326
00:14:08,990 --> 00:14:12,653
I don't know who put you up to
this sticking-together garbage,
327
00:14:12,727 --> 00:14:14,194
but I don't like it.
328
00:14:14,261 --> 00:14:17,321
Therefore, you have forced me
to do something terrible.
329
00:14:18,299 --> 00:14:20,733
Say good-bye
to a cherished family member.
330
00:14:21,902 --> 00:14:23,893
Who?
331
00:14:23,971 --> 00:14:25,336
[All]
No!
332
00:14:27,408 --> 00:14:29,273
- Mom, no!
- Uh-uh-uh.
333
00:14:29,343 --> 00:14:30,469
Don't you dare.
334
00:14:30,544 --> 00:14:32,876
[Knocking]
335
00:14:32,947 --> 00:14:35,177
And don't move a muscle.
336
00:14:40,054 --> 00:14:41,112
Hi, Lois.
337
00:14:41,188 --> 00:14:42,450
Look, Ed, uh, it's 9:00.
338
00:14:42,523 --> 00:14:44,047
I'm a little busy right now.
339
00:14:44,125 --> 00:14:45,456
You see,
there is the problem.
340
00:14:45,526 --> 00:14:47,790
It's 9:00 at night
and I keep hearing screaming.
341
00:14:47,862 --> 00:14:50,296
Now this didn't sound like
your normal screaming.
342
00:14:50,364 --> 00:14:52,161
It was more like
killing screaming.
343
00:14:52,233 --> 00:14:53,598
I'm not one to complain...
344
00:14:53,667 --> 00:14:54,793
That's why we like you.
345
00:14:59,807 --> 00:15:02,742
[Panting]
346
00:15:02,810 --> 00:15:07,611
In your room now.
347
00:15:10,451 --> 00:15:11,782
[Admiring Whistle]
348
00:15:11,852 --> 00:15:13,444
Nice place you got here.
349
00:15:13,521 --> 00:15:14,647
Thank you, sir.
350
00:15:14,722 --> 00:15:17,418
I like to, uh,
create an atmosphere.
351
00:15:17,491 --> 00:15:19,686
Did you enjoy your meal, sir?
352
00:15:19,760 --> 00:15:22,285
Well... if you can call four olives,
two onions...
353
00:15:22,363 --> 00:15:24,160
and a whole lot of alcohol a meal,
354
00:15:24,231 --> 00:15:25,493
then, yes.
355
00:15:25,566 --> 00:15:27,158
Very good, sir.
356
00:15:28,269 --> 00:15:29,395
Uh...
357
00:15:29,470 --> 00:15:31,597
what have you got
in the cologne department?
358
00:15:31,672 --> 00:15:34,266
Um, were you looking
for anything in particular?
359
00:15:34,341 --> 00:15:37,037
Well, I've been thinking
about a signature scent.
360
00:15:37,111 --> 00:15:40,046
You see, I'd like to leave a room
and have people say,
361
00:15:40,114 --> 00:15:41,911
"Boy, it smells like Hal in here"
362
00:15:41,982 --> 00:15:43,210
but...
363
00:15:43,284 --> 00:15:43,943
in a nice way.
364
00:15:44,018 --> 00:15:45,076
Right. Yeah.
365
00:15:45,152 --> 00:15:47,712
Uh, let's see... you...
366
00:15:47,788 --> 00:15:50,154
you strike me as a...
367
00:15:50,224 --> 00:15:51,452
sandalwood.
368
00:15:51,525 --> 00:15:52,617
Sandalwood, huh?
369
00:15:52,693 --> 00:15:53,785
Sandalwood.
370
00:15:53,861 --> 00:15:55,886
Let's give it a smell-see, shall we?
371
00:15:55,963 --> 00:15:58,955
Huh?
372
00:15:59,033 --> 00:16:00,159
Yes.
373
00:16:00,234 --> 00:16:01,496
That's quite nice.
374
00:16:01,569 --> 00:16:02,501
Hit me.
375
00:16:02,570 --> 00:16:04,435
Here we go.
376
00:16:04,505 --> 00:16:07,599
Oh, that's...
that is quite nice.
377
00:16:07,675 --> 00:16:08,664
Ooh!
378
00:16:08,742 --> 00:16:10,334
You do a service
to your craft, sir.
379
00:16:10,411 --> 00:16:12,538
This man is a genius.
380
00:16:16,150 --> 00:16:17,481
Snooty bastard.
381
00:16:17,551 --> 00:16:20,486
You'd think this place would
be the great equalizer, huh?
382
00:16:20,554 --> 00:16:23,284
You know,
even a king looks like a fool...
383
00:16:23,357 --> 00:16:25,018
when he's answering
nature's call.
384
00:16:25,092 --> 00:16:26,491
Am I right?
Of course I'm right.
385
00:16:26,560 --> 00:16:27,754
Well.
386
00:16:27,828 --> 00:16:29,022
It's been a pleasure.
387
00:16:30,664 --> 00:16:32,097
Oh.
388
00:16:32,166 --> 00:16:34,100
Sorry.
389
00:16:34,168 --> 00:16:35,192
Have a good evening.
390
00:16:36,270 --> 00:16:37,396
Uh, sir.
391
00:16:37,471 --> 00:16:39,268
Yes.
392
00:16:42,109 --> 00:16:44,407
Thank you for making
eye contact with me.
393
00:16:47,548 --> 00:16:50,711
Boys, I just,
I don't know what to do anymore.
394
00:16:50,784 --> 00:16:52,911
I don't want to punish anyone.
395
00:16:52,987 --> 00:16:54,648
All I want is the truth.
396
00:16:54,722 --> 00:16:59,159
I don't know how things got this far,
but I just want it to stop.
397
00:17:01,262 --> 00:17:02,991
Naw, they'll never buy it.
398
00:17:17,578 --> 00:17:18,840
Oh, my God. Hal.
399
00:17:22,082 --> 00:17:23,242
They saved the TV.
400
00:17:23,317 --> 00:17:24,614
All right! Yeah! Yeah!
401
00:17:24,685 --> 00:17:26,778
Beautiful work. Beautiful.
402
00:17:26,854 --> 00:17:28,651
You have her exactly
where you want her...
403
00:17:28,722 --> 00:17:29,711
totally crazy.
404
00:17:29,790 --> 00:17:31,314
Now it's time
to take the offensive.
405
00:17:31,392 --> 00:17:32,620
The offensive?
406
00:17:32,693 --> 00:17:34,058
Exactly. She won't...
407
00:17:34,128 --> 00:17:35,322
Wait a minute.
408
00:17:35,396 --> 00:17:36,829
Did you hear breathing?
409
00:17:36,897 --> 00:17:37,659
What?
410
00:17:39,533 --> 00:17:40,591
Mom?
411
00:17:48,742 --> 00:17:49,674
Malcolm.
412
00:17:49,743 --> 00:17:52,974
Would you hang up the phone, please?
413
00:17:53,047 --> 00:17:54,105
Hi, Mom.
414
00:17:54,181 --> 00:17:55,307
Happy anniversary.
415
00:17:55,382 --> 00:17:56,610
Not good! Not good!
416
00:17:56,684 --> 00:17:57,878
What is it? What?
417
00:17:57,952 --> 00:17:59,010
Mom! Phone!
418
00:17:59,086 --> 00:18:00,610
Oh! Oh, man. Oh, man.
419
00:18:00,688 --> 00:18:01,882
We're gonna die!
420
00:18:01,956 --> 00:18:02,980
That's it.
421
00:18:03,057 --> 00:18:03,989
I got to run away.
422
00:18:04,058 --> 00:18:04,990
Wait!
423
00:18:05,059 --> 00:18:06,083
We can get out of this.
424
00:18:06,160 --> 00:18:07,787
You have to use
that brain of yours.
425
00:18:07,861 --> 00:18:08,793
Think.
426
00:18:08,862 --> 00:18:09,794
Think!
427
00:18:09,863 --> 00:18:13,196
All I can think about
is how hard he's twisting my nipple.
428
00:18:13,267 --> 00:18:14,564
Ow!
429
00:18:14,635 --> 00:18:15,897
Okay.
430
00:18:15,970 --> 00:18:17,369
Think. Think.
431
00:18:18,639 --> 00:18:19,697
I got it.
432
00:18:30,284 --> 00:18:31,842
Oh. Mmm. Here it is.
433
00:18:31,919 --> 00:18:33,181
That's our song.
434
00:18:33,254 --> 00:18:35,722
- Not our song.
- [Laughing]
435
00:18:35,789 --> 00:18:37,188
Can I have...?
436
00:18:37,258 --> 00:18:38,885
Another one...
437
00:18:40,427 --> 00:18:42,452
I cannot believe you, Francis.
438
00:18:42,529 --> 00:18:45,623
You think you are so clever
turning them against me, don't you?
439
00:18:45,699 --> 00:18:47,326
No, Mom.
440
00:18:47,401 --> 00:18:49,562
We did not send you to Marlin Academy
so that you can undermine...
441
00:18:49,637 --> 00:18:50,831
my authority long-distance.
442
00:18:50,904 --> 00:18:53,065
Why did you send me?
443
00:18:53,140 --> 00:18:55,370
Well, it was not so that you
could undermine my authority.
444
00:18:55,442 --> 00:18:58,741
And if I am not mistaken,
you are undermining my authority.
445
00:18:58,812 --> 00:18:59,938
What are you doing?
446
00:19:00,014 --> 00:19:02,881
Spending your anniversary at home
fixating on a stupid dress.
447
00:19:02,950 --> 00:19:04,315
Is that what you wanted
to do tonight?
448
00:19:04,385 --> 00:19:06,376
What am I supposed to do, Francis?
Let it go?
449
00:19:06,453 --> 00:19:08,978
Yes. That is exactly
what you should do... let it go.
450
00:19:09,056 --> 00:19:11,752
But you can't,
'cause you can never let anything go.
451
00:19:11,825 --> 00:19:15,522
I can, too, let things go.
452
00:19:15,596 --> 00:19:16,722
- Fine.
- I can.
453
00:19:16,797 --> 00:19:18,264
- Fine.
- I can!
454
00:19:18,332 --> 00:19:19,697
Okay. Forget I said anything.
455
00:19:22,970 --> 00:19:24,460
I cannot talk to you anymore.
456
00:19:24,538 --> 00:19:25,766
Ooh, you make me so mad.
457
00:19:25,839 --> 00:19:27,898
Sometimes I just want
to break your neck.
458
00:19:27,975 --> 00:19:29,704
Did you get the cookies
I sent you?
459
00:19:29,777 --> 00:19:31,005
Yeah, they were great.
460
00:19:31,078 --> 00:19:32,739
Good.
461
00:19:32,813 --> 00:19:34,747
[Crashing And Breaking]
462
00:19:46,427 --> 00:19:50,727
I swear to God, on paper,
this was a great idea.
463
00:19:54,668 --> 00:19:55,862
All right, that's it.
464
00:19:55,936 --> 00:19:58,029
Get dressed...
we're going to dinner.
465
00:19:58,105 --> 00:20:00,630
Oh, my God, it did work.
466
00:20:00,708 --> 00:20:02,039
What?
467
00:20:02,109 --> 00:20:04,236
Dinner. I won't have you boys
starving to death.
468
00:20:04,311 --> 00:20:07,303
The last thing I need is a bunch
of social workers and reporters...
469
00:20:07,381 --> 00:20:08,575
tearing up the front lawn.
470
00:20:08,649 --> 00:20:10,674
Now, hurry up before
I change my mind.
471
00:20:10,751 --> 00:20:11,945
What about the dress?
472
00:20:13,020 --> 00:20:15,181
I really liked that dress.
473
00:20:25,833 --> 00:20:28,393
[Hal]
Hey, thanks for the ride, Tony.
474
00:20:28,469 --> 00:20:31,302
[Tony]
Any time, Hal!
475
00:20:31,372 --> 00:20:33,203
Hello!
476
00:20:35,042 --> 00:20:36,304
Honey?
477
00:20:37,711 --> 00:20:38,973
Boys?
478
00:20:39,046 --> 00:20:40,775
Anybody home?
479
00:20:41,949 --> 00:20:43,211
Hotcha!
480
00:20:44,685 --> 00:20:47,552
This evening just keeps getting
better and better.
481
00:21:02,102 --> 00:21:03,160
Hmm.
482
00:21:18,452 --> 00:21:19,680
Oh! No.
483
00:21:19,753 --> 00:21:23,052
Okay. Oh. Jeezle.
484
00:21:23,123 --> 00:21:25,057
Not again.
485
00:21:25,125 --> 00:21:26,717
[Flushing]
29955
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