Original subtitles

- [Amber] Tonight on Wiseguy.

- The first thing I'd like you to do

is deal with the Terranova problem.

- What Terranova problem?

- He's a criminal.

(light accordion music)

- [Rudy] There is a crisis in this room.

- There are guys out there that aren't so happy.

- If this crisis finds its way into our family

I will return to the business.

You do not want that.

- You came all the way out here to tell us

to leave a guy alone that we ain't even bothering.

(guns firing)

(dramatic music)

(plane engine roaring)

- Oh, it's so wonderful to be home.

Please, can we go faster?

- Look at these potatoes.

- Take the other bridge.

- Look at this traffic.

- Why don't you call him?

- Well, I can't (laughs), oh.

- Dial your number and hit send.

- Send, oh send.

- [Operator] We're sorry, the number you have dialed

is not in service in area code 2-0-1.

- Why am I getting New Jersey?

- You're in the 2-0-1 area code.

- I'm in 7-1-8, I wanted Vincenzo.

- He's in Brooklyn.

- Well, I'm in Brooklyn.

- The phone's in Jersey.

- The phone is right here.

- Technology.

(telephone ringing)

- Grazie.

(telephone ringing)

- Hello.

- Oh, Vincenzo.

- Ma, hey, where are ya?

- [Carlotta] Here.

- Here, where here?

- New York, we're on the way

to drop our things off at Peto's house, then.

(telephone crackling)

Hello, Vincenzo?

- Ma, you there, Ma?

- Noise, only noise.

(telephone crackling)

(telephone ringing)

- Hello?

- Amber, it's me.

Listen, we need a rain check for dinner tonight.

My Ma just got back in town.

- Well, that's great.

Any chance for late dessert?

- Yeah, you can let yourself in.

You got a key.

- Okay, bye.

- [Vinnie] Hey, Ma!

- Vincenzo, Vincenzo!

- [Vinnie] Hey.

(Carlotta giggling)

You look great!

- Oh, I feel great.

I think Europe agrees with me.

Maybe too much (giggles).

- [Vinnie] Hey!

- Vincenzo (chuckles)!

- [Vinnie] Welcome home, welcome home.

- It's good to be home.

Even if it is a little premature, huh.

(all laughing)

- [Vinnie] Hey, Pooch!

What do ya say, Pooch.

How's it going, man?

(speaking in foreign language)

- [Rudy] Let me get my hat.

- [Vinnie] Ma, Ma, what'd you do buy out Europe?

- Oh well, maybe we bought too much (giggles).

- [Rudy] Pooch, get that van unloaded.

- I suppose we can make it home.

Oh my God, these are my things.

It's my mother's from the old country.

- Vincenzo and I thought these things

would make you more comfortable.

- Oh, thank you, thank you (chuckles).

- [Vinnie] Come on guys, let's go.

- Hey, be careful of that!

You go down there.

I'll show you were it goes.

Poochy, I wanna get started on the greenhouse right away.

- [Poochy] I got that under control.

- What's the deal, Mom.

You weren't back for another couple of months yet.

- When do I meet her?

- I knew it, I knew that's why you came back.

- Ah (chuckles)!

- [Poochy] He's building one like the old one.

- That's wonderful.

- These two have been working around the clock

since they heard you were coming back premature (chuckles).

- Poochy, find a good place for my grappa.

What's the kid been doing?

- Eh, he's been keeping a low horizon.

I'll check around.

- Of course I want you to meet her, Ma.

- Tonight, I'll cook some pasta.

- I can't do it tonight.

It's too short of notice.

- [Carlotta] Well tomorrow, for lunch.

- [Vinnie] She works.

- [Carlotta] Oh, she's got a good job.

- Yeah, she's got a very good job.

- Is she Italian?

- No Ma, she's not Italian.

Not all nice people are Italian, you know.

- But she is Catholic?

- [Vinnie] Yeah.

- Is she from our parish?

- [Vinnie] No.

- Well, when am I going to meet her?

- Tomorrow night for dinner.

I'll take you all out.

(Carlotta laughs)

Well, let him go see his lady friend,

or there'll be no need for dinner, go, go.

- All right, you happy, huh, tomorrow for dinner?

- [Carlotta] Yeah.

- Okay, it's good to have you home, Ma.

- Thank you, darling, good to be home.

- Okay, I'll see you later.

- [Carlotta] Yeah, good.

- [Rudy] Vincenzo.

- Oh, he looks terrible.

I should've never left.

- [Vinnie] Hi.

- Hi, sorry, I ate the whole thing.

It was so good.

- [Vinnie] Ah, that's all right.

I lost my appetite anyway.

- What happened?

- Ah, my mother.

She wants us to have dinner with her

and Don Aiuppo tomorrow night.

- So, that's nice.

- Oh yeah, well, we'll see how nice.

- You worried about my table manners?

- No, you're not the one I'm worried about.

- So, what could go wrong?

I'll be the picture of decorum tomorrow.

(light piano music)

(light orchestral music)

(water splashing)

♪ Then I'll know just what to do ♪

♪ Oh, wrap it up and give it all to you ♪

♪ Oh, oh, wrap it up and give it all to you ♪

(Amber gasps)

- Ma, Ma, would you talk to me, please?

You know, it's not what you think it is.

- [Carlotta] I don't have to think, I can see.

- You know, you're not being fair about this.

- [Carlotta] I don't want to talk about it.

- Oh, you don't wanna talk about it.

It was important enough for you

to come all the way back from Italy.

- To meet a nice girl.

- Amber is a nice girl.

- Nice girl, naked and wet.

- [Vinnie] I heard that.

- Mm, it smells great in here.

Can I help you with breakfast Mrs. Aiuppo?

- I've been making my son breakfast for 30 years.

- I'm really sorry.

This wasn't exactly the way

I was expecting our first meeting either.

I just hope I haven't offended you.

I hope we can see each other again.

- That's right, for dinner, right Ma?

We're all gonna have dinner together, right Ma?

- It was Rudy's idea.

- Well, I'm very much looking forward

to meeting your husband.

- She's older than you.

She dyes her hair.

- Well, so what Ma?

She's a mature woman.

She can do what she wants.

- Well, why isn't she married?

- 'Cause she's a widow, that's why?

- Oh, she's a young widow.

What did she do, work him to death?

- Oh Ma, will you please.

- Does she know you're a policeman?

- No, she doesn't know I'm a policeman.

- So, she thinks you're a gangster?

What kind of mature woman dates a gangster?

Vincenzo looks so bad.

The house looks bad.

Maybe if I'd been here it wouldn't have happened.

- You're gonna ruin your dinner.

- I'm doing nothing, I'm uh, powdering.

- Carlotta, all I've been listening to is you fretting.

You're gonna scare that poor girl away.

- Well good, she's not for Vincenzo.

She's an older woman.

- That shows Vincenzo is a man.

He ain't out chasing girls.

- She's been married.

she's in the music business.

- That makes her an interesting person.

(Carlotta scoffs)

(chuckles) Which one do you like?

- You know, Vincenzo has never

talked about a girl in his life

the way he talks about this one.

I just don't understand it.

- Why should you understand what they don't understand?

(chuckles) Which one?

- This.

- Carlotta, go put on your dress.

You come back, you show me how beautiful you are.

(Carlotta sighs)

Trust your son Carlotta and give the girl a chance.

- The kid hasn't been doing much.

He was in the rag trade about a minute and a half,

and he bought some record company.

Sold his interest to his partner.

Some brasciole named Bobbie Travis.

Didn't do much before that.

Now, he does nothing.

- Oh Carlotta, you look beautiful.

You in better spirits?

- No.

- You might at least try to put on a little smile.

(Rudy mumbling)

(light piano music)

- I don't know, it must be something in my blood,

but even with all the aggravation I just,

I can't imagine myself doing any other kind of work.

- You like your work, that's good.

Obviously, it likes you.

(light piano music)

It's nice to know what you wanna do

with your life, hey Vincenzo?

- Yeah, yeah, I guess it is, yeah.

(light piano music)

- I proposed to Carlotta at this very table.

Vinnie was there,

and when she said yes, oh oh.

I was the happiest man in the world.

Three of us at this table, we've been widowed.

- It's a strange kind of loneliness

when someone you love dies.

It's hard to explain.

- A smart woman can get through it,

if she knows the difference between love and loneliness.

Doesn't confuse them with the first thing

that comes along with two legs.

- Come on with your two legs.

You need to dance.

(light violin music)

- Amber, I swear, I don't know what's gotten into my mother.

- I think it's kind of sweet.

- [Vinnie] Sweet?

- Yeah, Vinnie, she's just being a good mother.

(light violin music)

- What are they doing?

- Carlotta, let them be, I like her.

- Oh, I know what you like.

- Her qualities, strength, character, a good heart.

You know, you spoiled Vincenzo.

He wants in his woman what he sees in you.

- Oh, Vincenzo's not ready for marriage.

- Hey, you cut short a trip, my greenhouse isn't even ready,

and all the way back on that jet I gotta listen

to wedding plans and names for your grandchildren.

Carlotta, the only one talking about marriage is you.

- Please, I want to apologize for ruining dinner.

- You didn't ruin dinner, Mrs. Aiuppo.

- [Carlotta] Rudy, I would like to speak to Vincenzo.

- Care to dance?

(light violin music)

- Oh Vincenzo, I'm no happier with my behavior than you are.

I'm worried about losing you.

- Ma, you're not losing me.

- Vincenzo, if you two

are serious about each other, tell me.

- Ma, we don't even know the answer to that ourselves.

We're just having a good time getting to know each other.

I can't see into the future.

- Rudy has given up one life for another,

because he loves me.

I love him, but the heart must have a practical side.

Rudy and I know many things about each other.

When I fell in love with him I knew exactly who he was.

You mustn't fall in love in the middle of a lie, Vincenzo.

It isn't fair to anyone.

(light accordion music)

- [Amber] You know, it turned out

to be a really nice evening.

- Yeah, it really did.

Amber, I got something to tell ya.

I'm a cop.

(dramatic music)

- Hey everybody, he's a cop!

Vinnie Terranova's a cop!

- Amber!

- A cop!

(dramatic music)

Vinnie, are you all right?

You wanna sit down?

- No, no, I just wanna get this off my chest.

I'm a cop

You're under arrest.

Spread 'em, spread 'em!

You have the right to remain silent.

- You're a cop?

- [Vinnie] Anything you say can

and will be used against you in a court of law.

- I hate you.

- You have a right to an attorney.

If you can't afford one, one will be provided for you.

Do you understand these rights

as I've explained them to you?

- Vinnie, Vinnie, are you all right, what's wrong?

- Nothing, nothing, um, it's not important.

Can I get a beer?

- Yeah.

(doorbell ringing)

This has to be for you.

- [Vinnie] Who is it?

- Good morning.

- How'd you get up here?

Don't they screen people at the door anymore?

- Vincenzo, we need to talk.

- Come on in.

- I had a very enjoyable evening.

I wanna apologize for my wife's behavior.

- Oh, you don't need to apologize.

She only wants the best for her son.

If you'll excuse me, I have an early business meeting.

- Poochy will take you where you wanna go.

- [Amber] No, no, that's not necessary.

- Of course it's not necessary,

but I have a car available,

and I'd like to talk to Vinnie alone, huh?

- Okay, thank you.

Okay Poochy, let's go.

- Nice girl, smart, pretty.

- She's not a girl, she's a woman.

- To me, she's a girl.

Vinnie, I don't like to see

you and your mother acting like this.

- You think I like it?

- Amber was not exactly what Carlotta expected.

A woman older than you.

A woman with her own business.

A business known for its flamboyance.

A widow, your mother wasn't counting on that.

This the husband?

- [Vinnie] Yes.

- Your mother know this?

- No.

- Any children?

- No, no.

- No need for your mother to know.

- Oh, please.

- Vinnie, your mother and I were raised in a time

when people stuck with their own people,

people their own blood.

Now, anything goes and who's to say what's right?

If two people are good together that's what's important.

Let's talk about you.

- About me?

- You've been dabbling in our business.

- I am not in our business.

- So far, you have failed in the diamond trade

and the music business.

- I did not fail.

- You didn't succeed.

You have nothing to show for your efforts.

Vinnie, dabbling is fine for a single, young man,

but if a man is gonna raise a family he has to be serious.

He has to think more about leaving something behind

for the family, for their future.

Now, if a man is going to be truly successful

he has to have an understanding with a powerful man.

- But I thought you were out of the business.

- I am, I am, but I still have the influence to help you.

If you were some Pinocchio, I wouldn't lift a hand,

but like it or not, I married your mother.

You are stuck with me and there are certain people

who might not understand that.

(light violin music)

(singing in foreign language)

- Why do you stop?

(speaking in foreign language)

- My old friend.

Who has died?

- Joey Boats, they shot him five times

while he sat in his Cadillac.

- No kidding?

- When?

- [Tony] Just this morning.

- He loved that Cadillac.

- Hey Pooch.

- You know Vinnie Terranova, my stepson.

Say hello to Anthony Ziffo.

- Mr. Ziffo.

- Tony, please.

Vinnie, Joey Grosset.

Jimmy Novovich, Patsy Pallalo, Sylvester Pastornic.

Tommy Striani, and uh, Mr. Callahan,

and Albert, Albert Cerrico.

- Al Cerrico.

- How ya doin'?

- All right, how are you?

- Okay.

- Hey Rico, I need sette.

(choral music)

- Mrs. Terr,

Mrs. Terranova, I'm in love with your son,

and I want him to be happy, just like you do.

I may not be the woman you would like for your son,

but sometimes when these things happen, they just happen.

Vinnie and I didn't will this anymore than you did.

I don't wanna take your son away from you.

It's not easy for either of us.

(choral music)

- Right in his driveway, his family heard the shots.

Poor Joey Boats.

I think it was the Asians.

He was doing something with the Asians, hey Albert?

- It wasn't the Asians.

But hey, Joey's dead and uh, I'll provide for his family.

- It is only proper.

Too much of what goes on now is no longer proper.

It's a sad thing for me.

- Well, you retired with dignity.

There's none of that left.

No dignity, no self-respect.

We can't even talk amongst ourselves like men,

because other men are listening.

- Well, that's a great excuse to sit and do nothing.

- Nobody's sitting, we got business.

- What kind of business?

I hear you're in the boat business now.

- Gotta deal for you anytime.

- I'm here.

- Stop it, enough.

I did not come here for this.

- What did you come here for, nostalgia?

- What's wrong with nostalgia?

- Well, for old men, nothing.

For young men, it's death,

and uh, well this uh, this thing of ours

has become the contemplation room at Calvary.

- Hey, Albert.

- Hey Don Antonio, I'm happy with what I got.

- So, what's the problem?

- Well, the problem is uh,

there are guys out there that aren't so happy.

- Yeah so, what do you want?

You wanna go outside and declare yourself?

- No, I say that to this room.

- Hey, what is this, a festival of buffoons?

It's our club, where differences should be discussed

in an atmosphere of mutual respect.

- Excuse us, Don, about the death of uh, Joey Boats, it eh.

- Left us all a little dingy.

(men laughing)

- He sure loved that Cadillac.

(men laughing)

- This is better.

It's much better to laugh and go forward.

I am very happy to be back in America with my family.

Vincenzo, he's my stepson, is in love.

His mother (chuckles),

his mother's thinking about grandchildren.

Now, these things tend to push a young man into marriage.

I began to think what a joy it would be to me

to have my old friends gather to such a happy occasion.

Then it occurred to me

that such an event might be misinterpreted.

There should be a marriage or not?

I don't want my friendship with Vincenzo

to be seen as a passing of a torch.

He is not my son by blood, but he's my son.

I want his life to be full and happy,

and I wanna be able to talk to him without you jabrones

thinking that we're hatching a plot.

- Ah, this is wonderful news.

- So, when are gettin' married?

- I'm not.

- How you give your mother grandchildren

and not get married?

- Well, I'm just--

- You marrying a puttana?

- I'm not gettin' married.

- So, you came all the way out here to tell us uh,

to leave a guy alone that we ain't even bothering?

- I came to tell you that this man,

who is not in our business,

is on my protection.

There is a crisis in this room.

I can smell it all the way out in Brooklyn.

It's why I'm here,

and if this crisis finds it way into our family

I will return to the business.

You do not want that.

(dramatic music)

Vincenzo, you have to make decisions in your life.

Don Aiuppo,

if my mother finds out about this

neither one of us will have a life.

- Then she mustn't know.

- Vincent Terranova?

- [Vinnie] Yeah.

- You're under arrest.

- For what?

- For illegal exportation of cassette masters

owned by Winston Nuquay.

- I had nothing to do with that.

- (grunts) This is great!

- [Vinnie] What the hell is the matter with you?

- Aiuppo just gave you the keys to the candy store.

- [Vinnie] Yeah I know, you got the social club wired.

- That's right, for eight years.

They're masters at avoiding self-incrimination.

Just how long's Aiuppo been back?

- My mother dragged him out of Italy

when she found out about Amber.

He's here on his brother Peto's passport.

Hey, you're not gonna deport him, are ya?

'Cause Frank, all he wants to do

is spend the rest of his days

tending his greenhouse and doting on my mother.

He's perfectly harmless.

(Frank scoffs)

Frank, he is out of the business.

- [Frank] That is not the way it sounded to me.

- Well, you haven't been listening very closely.

He's not passing the baton.

He's just lettin' family know that I'm in a bubble now.

- I will grant you, he did not overtly come out with it,

but he made it clear, crystal clear to that assemblage

that Don Aiuppo is back in America.

- So what?

It doesn't matter anyway,

because that is the first and last time

that I'm dealing with the commission.

- Vince, I do not have to tell you

how many miles of track we would have to lay

to get a guy as close as you just got to the commission.

In terms of manpower, money, and dumb luck,

the OCB just hit a goldmine.

- Well, why is that when the OCB strikes gold

I'm always the one that gets the shaft?

- [Frank] Oh, come on, Vince.

- Frank, Don Aiuppo made promises to my mother.

Now, I am not helping him break those promises.

- Vince, this is what we do!

This is what it's all about!

The aggravation, the wreckage that becomes our home life.

This is it, this is the pay dirt.

The OCB has never run across something this big.

Ziffo, Joey Boats, Cerrico,

you just can not walk out on this.

- Frank, my whole family is wrapped up in this one.

It's not just my head in the noose.

Aiuppo is gonna be sucked back into the business,

and I'm gonna ruin my mothers marriage at the same time.

(Vinnie scoffs)

You know the only thing that makes any sense out of this?

Amber, 'cause everybody else I know in my life

is either pretending to be somebody else,

or is wanted by the law,

and you expect me to climb into bed

with every single one of them.

I finally get somebody real in my life,

I can't even get close enough to fall in love with her.

- All right Vince, you sort this out,

but I am not gonna let this die on us while you do.

- You're not gonna deport him, are you?

- I don't see how I can't.

(light music)

- Ma.

- Vincenzo, I've been thinking.

- So have I, Mom.

I think part of the reason that you don't like Amber

is because you don't know how I feel about her.

I guess I'm not very good at discussing my feelings.

Especially about women,

and definitely not with my mother in church.

- In church is where feelings should be discussed.

- Yeah, I don't know, Ma,

it's just that when I'm around her

I forget about all the lousy things in my world,

and I really need that.

- Vincenzo, are you sure she's right for you?

She works very hard at her job.

She might not always be there for you.

- I'm glad she works hard and that she likes what she does.

You know, with my hours,

it kinda takes the pressure off of me.

I don't know, Ma.

I don't know if I could be happy with a woman

that just wants to bounce babies on her knees,

and nag me about the garbage.

Is any of this making any sense to you?

Ma, you okay?

- Vincenzo, I will trust your judgment.

In case you decide she is the one for you

I want you to have this.

Your father gave me this ring.

Be happy, Vincenzo, that's all we ever wanted for you.

- Thank you, Ma, I love you.

(upbeat brass music)

- [Woman] Hey, come on, we're dancing.

- (laughs) You like that?

No, okay (laughs), go.

(upbeat brass music)

So, how ya doin'?

- How are ya?

- You're all alone here.

- Yep.

- Would you like to join us at our table?

- No thanks, but I'm waitin' for somebody.

- Your lady friend.

- Yep.

- Well, that's uh, that's good.

Okay, well enjoy yourself.

I'm sure you will.

If you change your mind.

(upbeat brass music)

- [Vinnie] Hi.

- Hi, haven't you run outta

quaint little neighborhood places to take me to yet?

- What're you kiddin'?

We haven't even started on the dives yet.

No no, no, no, I took the privilege

of ordering up some champagne.

- Oh my goodness, what's the occasion?

- What're you a hermit?

- Look around you, today is the start

of the festival of Saint Anthony's, eh.

- Oh yeah, good old Saint Anthony.

I always loved this feast.

What'd he do anyway?

- You know, I don't know.

(Amber laughs)

I just figured it was always an excuse

to just drink a lot of wine and eat a lot of pasta.

- Well, here's to good old Saint Anthony, whatever he did.

- Yes, right.

(speaking in foreign language)

- For the lovers.

(speaking in foreign language)

(light accordion music)

- I spoke to your mother.

I thought at the very least she should know how I felt,

and maybe I just wanted to hear myself say it out loud.

I don't know, but I think she appreciated it,

the effort anyway.

- Amber, well there's something

that you don't know about me.

Ordinarily, I just don't bop in and out

of people's lives like this.

- Oh great, here it comes.

- Wait, here what comes?

- I don't know, but it's bad.

You're having trouble telling me something, Vinnie.

Why don't you just come out and say it?

It' over.

- What?

- Yeah, you're kissing me off, right?

- [Vinnie] Amber, I--

- Look Vinnie, please don't explain, okay?

I mean, we had a few laughs, we had, you know, good times.

I'm an adult.

Hey, I got a stock portfolio, I can handle this.

What I don't need right now is a lecture.

What I need is to get some sleep.

Thanks for the memories.

It's really been a slice.

- Amber, Amber, please, just sit down, sit down.

What you don't know about me,

I'm a federal agent.

(Amber laughing)

Amber, remember Frank McPike?

- Yeah.

- He's my boss.

- What?

- Yeah, we acquired Dead Dog Records from the DEA,

so I could work inside the music industry.

- Vinnie, why are you telling me this?

- Because I think I wanna marry you.

- You think?

- I mean I know.

- Well, you think or you know?

- I think I know.

- (laughing) Well, if you only think you know,

what is it I'm supposed to say?

- Say you'll think about it, okay?

(light piano music)

(crowd cheering and applauding)

- Well, if this isn't a sign I don't know what is.

Oh Vinnie Terranova with two R's.

I would love to think about it.

(mellow music)

(Amber giggles)

- I'm so happy, I can't talk, oh Vincenzo.

(speaking in foreign language)

You make me so happy, happy, happy.

Oh, it's a wonderful day.

Yes, a wonderful day.

- Okay, Ma.

- Wonderful, wonderful (laughing).

- Hey, hey, hey, what's the celebration.

- Rudy, Vincenzo's getting--

- [Vinnie] Rudy, Amber and I think we're engaged.

- Eh, why didn't you say so?

- [Vinnie] I just did.

- Eh, this calls for my grappa, I got get it.

- [Carlotta] Oh yeah, yeah,

we'll all take a drink, yeah, yeah, to celebrate (laughs).

- Now Ma, now Ma, now Ma,

you can't get all crazy on us now, please huh.

- Mia, mia, you think you're engaged.

I think I'm happy.

(dog barking)

You know, I haven't had a drink since my wedding,

but tonight's a night to celebrate.

We're going to get drunk.

(crickets chirping)

(guns firing)

Oh, my God.

- [Vinnie] Amber, call the police.

- [Carlotta] Vincenzo, oh Rudy.

(suspenseful music)

(gun firing)

(tires screeching)

Oh, oh, oh, oh mia, oh, oh.

- (gasps) Oh, mother of God.

- It's all right, it's all right, it's all right, oh, oh.

(sirens wailing)

(dramatic music)

(dramatic music)

(whimsical orchestral music)