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The Comeback - Episode 4
Valerie Stands Up for Aunt Sassy
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Okay, are you guys ready to meet
the cast of "room and bored" ?
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Oh, come on. You can do
a better job than that.
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Are you ready
to meet the cast
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of "room and bored"?
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Valerie, how you feeling ?
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Oh, so excited.
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Show night's always
so exciting, you know.
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Just can't wait to get out there
in front of the people and
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just do our very very best.
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- Here he is, Chris Macness.
- It's magical.
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Chris just did a backflip.
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A backflip !
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My god, they love him out there.
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Jesse, on "i'm it,"
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The last two of us out
always used to do the robot.
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You know, that robot dance ? You know ?
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The audience loved it.
You wanna, maybe that would be cute.
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No, i'm not gonna do the robot.
That's like 100 years old.
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Yeah, that's why it was funny.
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- Have a great show, guys.
- You too.
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When i go out, i'll bow,
23
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And then i could smack you on the butt.
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- Maybe give you a swat ?
- Yeah, cool.
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- And I'll swat you back ?
- Well, no, I don't think so.
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And we'll just bow. Let's just bow.
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- It'd be cool.
- Well, that's all right.
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We'll just bow. Oh, there you go.
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Oh, there he is. Man.
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He's just a kid, you know ?
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He doesn't understand that,
you know, with comedy,
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You know, it requires a very
delicate touch, you know ?
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And people like valerie cherish
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And they don't want
to see her brutalized.
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- ... last but certainly not least.
- Sorry. Taken care of it.
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You loved her as the star of "i'm it,"
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Here she is...
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Valerie cherish !
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Yes yes.
40
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Yes.
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You are correct.
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You are right.
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A- Whoa !
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- Woo-Hoo !
- I got you !
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Hey !
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That's what we call forbidden love.
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How do i get that job, huh ? Okay.
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Places, everyone !
Places for the "a" scene !
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Hair and makeup. Last looks.
50
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Guess who just won
their way into my heart ?
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- Here we go.
- You guys !
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If i knew i was gonna have to run,
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I wouldn't have worn my clogs.
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That was some amazing work. Yeah.
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And this is our set, huh ?
Look at this beautiful set !
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You like that ?
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Let's all repeat after me.
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- Thank you, IKEA !
- Et voila.
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Aunt sassy's in the house.
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I'll see you later.
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Got to make an entrance.
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- Have a great show, guys !
- Thanks ! You too !
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- You were great.
- Oh, thanks.
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- Honey, you were great.
- Really ?
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- Yeah.
- Thank you. Good good.
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- What are you eating ? What is it ?
- Nuts.
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- From there ?
- From the bowl.
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- Oh no, mark. Don't eat those.
- I'm hungry.
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Oh, no. Mark, no.
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We have a grip here
whose missing his nose.
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God bless him. Just a prince of a guy.
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But he stands over
that bowl all day long
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- And things...
- What ?
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Things fall out, all right.
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There, i drew you a picture, so...
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- Where are you parked ?
- The guest lot.
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I'm out that way,
so i'll see you at home.
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Yeah, i'll see you.
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- What do i do with the nuts ?
- Put them down.
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- Not in the bowl. I meant on the table.
- All right, I...
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Let's just go.
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- Okay, I'll see you at home.
- Okay, bye bye.
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- Here's next week's script.
- Ah, thanks. Good job.
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Great show, Mike.
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Okay.
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Oh no no. That's not...
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What's the matter ?
88
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- Is something wrong with the script ?
- No no, nothing.
89
00:04:03,798 --> 00:04:06,323
Nothing's wrong with the script.
It's just one little line
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needs to be worked out, you know ?
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Just a little tweak, that's all.
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- Great show, Bob. See you next week.
- Good night, Valerie.
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He's the one with no nose, Jane.
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Great guy. Really is.
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What's the line ?
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Uh, well, Cassie's found a box of puppies,
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She wants to keep them
and sassy says,
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"Well, you see a box of puppies,
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I see korean barbeque. "
100
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Yeah yeah yeah.
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How often do you have
problems with a joke ?
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Me ? Never.
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Never. Hello ? Have you seen my costume ?
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No, I always give every joke my best shot.
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And then I just trust
that the writers are smart.
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They'll see it doesn't work
and they'll change it.
107
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What if they don't ?
108
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What if they don't change it ?
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Well then it's, then it's big trouble.
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You know ?
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We had a situation on, on "it. "
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00:05:00,485 --> 00:05:03,480
We had a Rodney King joke
in a courtroom scene
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Too soon after the I. A. Riots
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And, uh, you know,
115
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It killed the series, you know ?
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You have to be very careful with comedy.
117
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Edgy's funny. Too edgy is cancelation.
118
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You know, and I for one
would hate to see that happen
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Because that would be a shame.
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Really would. So...
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This isn't my car.
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Both silver.
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Okay, everybody.
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Valerie ! Look at these little sweeties !
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- Aren't they cute ?
- Uh-Huh. Aw.
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Reminds me of when
Nijinsky was this size.
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Now he's just a smelly old pee machine.
128
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- But I love him.
- Uh-Huh.
129
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Eddie, are Tom and Paulie G. here ?
130
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I don't think they're in yet.
Watch out for that one.
131
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- He's got the jaws of life
- Yeah, all right.
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- Valerie.
- Yeah ?
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- Hi, we haven't officially met. I'm Gigi.
- Hi, Gigi.
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I'm the new writer.
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- Welcome ! Oh, truly !
- Thank you.
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Oh, how great to have
a woman's voice in the writing.
137
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Oh, so smart of Tom and Paulie G.
Have you worked with them before ?
138
00:06:18,826 --> 00:06:21,423
Actually I've never worked
in television before.
139
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I'm a playwright from New York.
Where else ?
140
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- The big apple.
- Yeah.
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I spent some time there.
142
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Oh really ? I just wanted
to say how excited I am,
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Oh, me too, doll. Yeah, no, me too.
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- I'm gonna I have to talk to...
- Oh, okay. Sorry.
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Catch up with you later.
Tom. Paulie.
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Can I... One second. I...
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Oooh.
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Oops.
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That's a miss. That's not...
150
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This one's kind of clean.
151
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Um, anyway, great script.
152
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Again. You guys are
probably getting tired
153
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of hearing that, huh ?
154
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Just um...
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Just one...
156
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Just a teeny bit concerned
157
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about my line at the end of scene J.
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- What's wrong with it ?
- No big deal. It's good. It's good.
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Just, i'm not sure it's
gonna play, you know ?
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But you'll see it.
161
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We'll run it, you know ?
162
00:07:12,868 --> 00:07:16,310
And then you'll... change it
or whatever, you know ?
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Like you. Like usual.
164
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You missed a spot.
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- Big thank you. Big spot.
- Okay.
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Oh dear. Wow. Got you good.
167
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Yeah.
168
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Just kind of smearing it around.
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You almost got me.
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Damn, look at her puppies.
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I've got bartles & jaymes
and gouda upstairs.
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- Cassie.
- Aunt sassy,
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I know we're not supposed
to have pets, but...
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00:07:52,377 --> 00:07:54,721
How can you say no
to a box of puppies ?
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00:07:54,788 --> 00:07:57,720
You see a box of puppies,
I see korean barbeque.
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00:08:00,168 --> 00:08:02,780
- Okay, bang bang ! Let's move it !
- Movin'on !
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00:08:03,178 --> 00:08:04,810
Sorry, dear, I gotta... Jimmy !
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00:08:04,848 --> 00:08:06,250
Guys and gal.
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00:08:06,997 --> 00:08:10,362
Listen, can we just talk about
that last line for one second ?
180
00:08:10,417 --> 00:08:11,523
Uh, no.
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All right, seriously.
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00:08:14,185 --> 00:08:15,753
Listen, it just... It, um...
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I'm not sure about that
puppy line, you know ?
184
00:08:18,115 --> 00:08:20,290
'Cause it just seems like
everyone loves puppies.
185
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- It's so fun, it's great.
- Um-Hmm, yeah yeah.
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00:08:21,938 --> 00:08:24,350
And then aunt Sassy wants to eat one.
187
00:08:25,935 --> 00:08:28,991
- Yeah, you know ?
- No, i think it played.
188
00:08:29,538 --> 00:08:32,232
Well, you know, I always try
to honor the work, tom.
189
00:08:32,266 --> 00:08:34,202
So thank you. Thank you for that.
190
00:08:34,216 --> 00:08:36,160
But it feels like,
191
00:08:36,218 --> 00:08:37,140
You know...
192
00:08:37,775 --> 00:08:40,922
With that line, aunt sassy
is just unlikable, you know ?
193
00:08:40,937 --> 00:08:43,333
The audience is going to hate her.
Is that what we want ?
194
00:08:43,346 --> 00:08:46,603
- Nah, it's just a joke.
- Well, no, it is just a joke,
195
00:08:46,647 --> 00:08:49,153
but we need to stop
and think, you know ?
196
00:08:49,167 --> 00:08:51,073
Is this the direction
we want to go in ?
197
00:08:51,126 --> 00:08:52,380
I'm going in that direction.
198
00:08:55,318 --> 00:08:56,092
Okay.
199
00:08:58,618 --> 00:09:00,333
- What ?
- What are you doing ?
200
00:09:01,037 --> 00:09:03,953
You can't tell two 30-year-old
hotshots how to write.
201
00:09:04,015 --> 00:09:05,741
You want to start the "hate show"?
202
00:09:06,528 --> 00:09:07,643
Oh God, no.
203
00:09:08,236 --> 00:09:10,053
Right, yeah. Listen, okay.
204
00:09:10,397 --> 00:09:11,960
I didn't want to scare them, all right ?
205
00:09:11,986 --> 00:09:13,930
But on "I'm it", my character becky
206
00:09:13,966 --> 00:09:16,142
had a rodney king joke
in a courtroom scene.
207
00:09:16,188 --> 00:09:17,982
It ended us, all right ?
208
00:09:17,996 --> 00:09:20,750
It was, you know, right after the riots.
And it was, you know
209
00:09:20,785 --> 00:09:23,080
"Can't we all just like
each other more ?"
210
00:09:23,525 --> 00:09:25,352
You mean : "can't we all just get along ?"
211
00:09:25,425 --> 00:09:27,483
That was it. Very good. Yeah.
212
00:09:27,798 --> 00:09:30,260
You think that's why
your show was canceled ?
213
00:09:30,355 --> 00:09:32,863
- Well, yeah.
- Your show was canceled
214
00:09:32,888 --> 00:09:36,282
Because on the last season you had
a chimp working at the law firm.
215
00:09:37,438 --> 00:09:39,850
Now, you know the joke doesn't work
216
00:09:40,586 --> 00:09:42,350
And I know the joke doesn't work.
217
00:09:42,826 --> 00:09:45,780
Let the audience tell them
the joke doesn't work.
218
00:09:46,237 --> 00:09:48,381
- Honey, stay out of it.
- Mm-Hmm ?
219
00:09:49,186 --> 00:09:51,780
Mm-Hmm.
Mm-Hmm.
220
00:09:52,865 --> 00:09:53,761
Yeah.
221
00:09:55,788 --> 00:09:58,040
By the way, everyone loved that chimp.
222
00:09:58,638 --> 00:09:59,753
No they didn't.
223
00:10:01,647 --> 00:10:03,063
Do you feel better ?
224
00:10:04,216 --> 00:10:06,723
Well, it's always good
to talk to jimmy, you know ?
225
00:10:06,728 --> 00:10:08,750
And if they change that line, then great.
226
00:10:08,796 --> 00:10:10,160
And if they don't...
227
00:10:12,146 --> 00:10:13,060
You know.
228
00:10:13,108 --> 00:10:14,680
Oh, there's that girl writer.
229
00:10:17,905 --> 00:10:20,011
Hello there, lady writer.
230
00:10:20,057 --> 00:10:21,351
- Hi.
- Hi.
231
00:10:21,385 --> 00:10:24,452
Listen, I just, I wanted to tell you
how much I appreciated your support
232
00:10:24,505 --> 00:10:25,850
Today at the run through.
233
00:10:26,895 --> 00:10:28,003
- The puppy line ?
- Oh.
234
00:10:28,026 --> 00:10:30,290
Saw you nodding.
You and I, same page.
235
00:10:30,325 --> 00:10:32,152
- Oh, right. Yeah.
- Yes.
236
00:10:32,266 --> 00:10:33,242
You know.
237
00:10:33,897 --> 00:10:37,460
Look at that face, huh ?
Aw. So cute, yeah.
238
00:10:37,516 --> 00:10:40,390
Aunt Sassy might hate puppies,
but Valerie Cherish does not.
239
00:10:40,445 --> 00:10:41,373
Okay ?
240
00:10:42,625 --> 00:10:44,881
M- M-M-M-M. Eat you up.
241
00:10:46,185 --> 00:10:47,321
Not really.
242
00:10:48,566 --> 00:10:52,232
I had to leave my dog with my parents
when I came out here and I miss him so much.
243
00:10:52,266 --> 00:10:53,440
Yeah, sure.
244
00:10:53,468 --> 00:10:55,470
Aaaaw. Yeah.
245
00:10:55,978 --> 00:10:57,510
Look at that. Look at this guy.
246
00:10:58,657 --> 00:11:00,960
How cute. Look at that.
247
00:11:00,975 --> 00:11:02,981
Nothing like'em. Nothing like'em.
248
00:11:03,058 --> 00:11:04,663
My husband and I have
been talking about
249
00:11:04,677 --> 00:11:06,710
adopting a little doggie for ourselves.
250
00:11:06,775 --> 00:11:09,140
You could take one of these.
They're up for adoption.
251
00:11:10,727 --> 00:11:12,013
Can I ? Really ?
252
00:11:13,176 --> 00:11:15,130
Today's my lucky day, huh ?
253
00:11:15,525 --> 00:11:18,141
Okay. Okay, I'm gonna take this one.
254
00:11:18,156 --> 00:11:21,032
All right ? 'Cause I love it so much.
Love this puppy.
255
00:11:21,237 --> 00:11:22,681
Yes, I do. I love you.
256
00:11:23,018 --> 00:11:25,010
I love... Lucy !
257
00:11:25,946 --> 00:11:27,442
Name her lucy, huh ?
258
00:11:28,516 --> 00:11:30,680
Lucille ball is a personal hero of mine.
259
00:11:30,718 --> 00:11:31,842
A true legend.
260
00:11:31,865 --> 00:11:33,710
Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
261
00:11:33,745 --> 00:11:36,362
Everyone loved lucy.
You know, so funny.
262
00:11:36,426 --> 00:11:39,352
Never killed a puppy.
I'll tell you that much, right ?
263
00:11:40,116 --> 00:11:41,620
Listen, so do you want to get together
264
00:11:41,638 --> 00:11:44,461
- and talk about that joke or...
- Yeah.
265
00:11:44,506 --> 00:11:47,922
- She's going to need her shots.
- Sure. Oh yeah, of course.
266
00:11:47,997 --> 00:11:49,861
Um, you know, maybe...
267
00:11:50,025 --> 00:11:52,753
I don't know, sometime this week
we could grab a bite.
268
00:11:52,865 --> 00:11:54,861
And also, crate her at night.
269
00:11:54,908 --> 00:11:56,990
- Uh-Huh, sure.
- I would love that.
270
00:11:57,126 --> 00:11:59,042
Oh great, great. All right.
271
00:11:59,078 --> 00:12:01,740
- I should probably get going now, but uh...
- Okay.
272
00:12:01,836 --> 00:12:04,302
That's great. Wh- To- You know,
we'll make a plan
273
00:12:04,348 --> 00:12:05,680
- For maybe tomorrow ?
- Okay.
274
00:12:05,725 --> 00:12:07,973
And don't put her in bed with you
'cause you'll never get her out.
275
00:12:08,017 --> 00:12:10,613
All right, not in bed.
That's a whole lot of information.
276
00:12:10,656 --> 00:12:13,742
And I'll need you to sign some papers,
fill out some forms.
277
00:12:14,365 --> 00:12:17,431
I'm around all week so you
can catch me some other time.
278
00:12:17,457 --> 00:12:19,700
Okay ? So, great.
Okay, let's...
279
00:12:20,825 --> 00:12:22,823
Oops. How do you get it to go ?
280
00:12:23,216 --> 00:12:25,032
Well, she's gonna have
to be leash trained.
281
00:12:25,066 --> 00:12:27,513
The best thing to do is to hold
the leash tight in your hand...
282
00:12:27,517 --> 00:12:29,500
- Well. It is.
- ... and hold the leash slack.
283
00:12:29,845 --> 00:12:32,003
That's all right. I'm just gonna-
I'll carry it.
284
00:12:32,055 --> 00:12:35,113
It's fine. It's fine.
Okay, see you tomorrow.
285
00:12:35,456 --> 00:12:37,222
Okay.
Oh thanks, mickey.
286
00:12:38,437 --> 00:12:40,101
Well, look what I got, huh ?
287
00:12:42,017 --> 00:12:43,622
- We're up again.
- Okay.
288
00:12:44,845 --> 00:12:47,363
So you want to give me
that cue again for that new joke ?
289
00:12:48,387 --> 00:12:50,972
Oh, I'm sorry. All right, chew then cue.
All right ?
290
00:12:51,105 --> 00:12:53,451
I'm such a slave-Driver.
Huh, mickey ?
291
00:12:53,697 --> 00:12:55,761
- I'm sorry.
- Never mind.
292
00:12:56,397 --> 00:12:58,053
- So, cassie says,
- Yeah.
293
00:12:58,318 --> 00:13:00,090
"How can you say no
to a box of puppies ?"
294
00:13:00,137 --> 00:13:02,391
- And aunt sassy says...
- It's against the rules.
295
00:13:02,425 --> 00:13:04,081
If i let you have a box of puppies,
296
00:13:04,098 --> 00:13:06,872
I have to let old Mr. Schmidt
hang his satan flag in the window.
297
00:13:07,456 --> 00:13:08,140
Yeah.
298
00:13:08,188 --> 00:13:10,090
Oh, yeah. Paulie G.'s going
to like that one.
299
00:13:10,327 --> 00:13:12,231
- Watch, that'll be the one that flies.
- Cool.
300
00:13:12,508 --> 00:13:14,912
And it works for me because
everyone hates satan.
301
00:13:16,096 --> 00:13:19,831
- Just- Now who's Mr. Schmidt ?
- Just another tenant.
302
00:13:21,097 --> 00:13:23,561
Oh right. Who cares ?
As long as it's not aunt Sassy.
303
00:13:23,837 --> 00:13:25,671
It's good. This is good.
304
00:13:25,697 --> 00:13:28,791
You know, this is the first time
I've felt normal since I've been out here.
305
00:13:28,826 --> 00:13:30,180
At Yale, when I did a play,
306
00:13:30,217 --> 00:13:34,172
- The actresses and I would always collaborate...
- Nothing better. Nothing better.
307
00:13:34,688 --> 00:13:37,331
- Puppy's in my purse.
- Oh, you little scamp.
308
00:13:37,376 --> 00:13:40,120
- How'd you get your snifter in there ?
- You let her.
309
00:13:40,225 --> 00:13:41,992
All right, time for a nap.
310
00:13:42,026 --> 00:13:43,432
After all, still a puppy.
311
00:13:43,468 --> 00:13:45,861
All right, I'm going to go pitch
these jokes to the guys.
312
00:13:45,867 --> 00:13:49,711
Listen, when in doubt, always go
to something physical. Cause I can do that.
313
00:13:49,728 --> 00:13:52,612
In fact, here, I brought
in this episode of "I'm it. "
314
00:13:52,828 --> 00:13:54,942
- And it's all cued to the kiss scene.
- Okay.
315
00:13:54,955 --> 00:13:57,080
With Mike, he played my love interest.
316
00:13:57,108 --> 00:13:59,903
- Oh, I love this scene.
- Yeah, it was a big moment
317
00:13:59,967 --> 00:14:02,871
'Cause we had been fighting
our attraction for each other
318
00:14:03,046 --> 00:14:05,122
- Since the series started.
- Okay.
319
00:14:05,667 --> 00:14:07,020
- And it's physical.
- Oh.
320
00:14:07,075 --> 00:14:09,793
Okay, jane, are you going
to be able to see this you think ?
321
00:14:09,868 --> 00:14:12,522
- Yeah, we'll get it.
- Okay, all right. Good.
322
00:14:18,968 --> 00:14:21,402
We believe in the franklin vs. Evans case
323
00:14:21,476 --> 00:14:24,011
that the judge will rule
that you're too close !
324
00:14:25,637 --> 00:14:29,731
Becky, can you honestly tell me
you don't feel anything for me ?
325
00:14:30,526 --> 00:14:32,930
Mike, I'm... very fond of you.
326
00:14:37,636 --> 00:14:39,972
But we have a professional relationship
327
00:14:39,977 --> 00:14:42,990
And i think it's best
that we keep it that way.
328
00:14:43,177 --> 00:14:44,042
Okay.
329
00:14:44,937 --> 00:14:48,373
Okay, now if you don't mind,
i need to get a look at your briefs.
330
00:14:48,466 --> 00:14:49,661
For the lawson case !
331
00:14:50,708 --> 00:14:51,640
Oh god.
332
00:14:52,866 --> 00:14:54,110
What are you doing ?
333
00:14:54,226 --> 00:14:55,600
Are you talking to me ?
334
00:14:58,475 --> 00:15:00,722
Becky, come on. This is ridiculous.
335
00:15:00,747 --> 00:15:03,131
I know. Normally,
my secretary does the filing.
336
00:15:05,476 --> 00:15:07,012
Becky, look at me.
337
00:15:10,975 --> 00:15:12,372
Oh god.
338
00:15:15,756 --> 00:15:17,802
Becky, you can't leave
me here like this.
339
00:15:17,948 --> 00:15:21,060
Don't worry, I'll send food and water.
340
00:15:27,756 --> 00:15:29,320
Oh, what the hell.
341
00:15:39,798 --> 00:15:41,272
- Wow.
- Wow.
342
00:15:42,327 --> 00:15:43,610
- Excuse me.
- Yeah.
343
00:15:44,305 --> 00:15:46,251
- So, see that ?
- Yeah, it was like a...
344
00:15:46,285 --> 00:15:48,473
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Yeah.
345
00:15:48,858 --> 00:15:51,993
She's a tough D. A., but...
Mickey, can you pause it, please ?
346
00:15:52,497 --> 00:15:54,633
Even though she's a tough D. A...
347
00:15:54,655 --> 00:15:57,103
Just hit- Pause it.
Can you pause it ?
348
00:15:57,266 --> 00:15:59,701
Just hit the button, Mickey ! Yeah, good.
349
00:15:59,765 --> 00:16:02,762
All right, even though she's a tough D. A.,
350
00:16:02,837 --> 00:16:05,102
I was still able to make her likable.
351
00:16:05,147 --> 00:16:08,171
- Yeah.
- You know, 'cause that's what i do, you know.
352
00:16:08,235 --> 00:16:11,032
- If i have the right words.
- Yeah, well.
353
00:16:11,338 --> 00:16:12,652
Uh-Oh.
354
00:16:14,038 --> 00:16:17,503
I think lucy has some'splaining to do.
355
00:16:18,136 --> 00:16:19,203
Take her.
356
00:16:20,647 --> 00:16:22,192
I didn't smell that.
357
00:16:23,337 --> 00:16:25,051
Puppy pooed on my pashmina.
358
00:16:25,135 --> 00:16:28,093
Oh, i think it's in your hair too, valerie.
359
00:16:28,357 --> 00:16:30,393
- Right where ?
- Right there.
360
00:16:30,695 --> 00:16:33,080
- Okay, mickey ?
- Here, paper towel.
361
00:16:33,098 --> 00:16:35,872
- Uh-Huh.
- Paper towel. Don't rub it.
362
00:16:36,157 --> 00:16:36,963
Pat it.
363
00:16:38,047 --> 00:16:39,271
Yeah yeah.
364
00:16:40,607 --> 00:16:42,632
Yes ! Come in !
365
00:16:42,707 --> 00:16:45,200
- Hey, valerie ? Sorry to interrupt.
- Yeah ?
366
00:16:45,375 --> 00:16:48,333
Hey, Gigi, Tom and Paulie G.
are looking all over for you.
367
00:16:48,405 --> 00:16:50,233
Oh my god, i had no idea it was so late.
368
00:16:50,775 --> 00:16:53,093
- Is that a shit smell ?
- Valérie, I have to go.
369
00:16:53,117 --> 00:16:54,843
Yeah, no worries, dear. That's okay.
370
00:16:54,858 --> 00:16:57,730
Listen, if you don't mind, could you
just tell Tom and Paulie G
371
00:16:57,745 --> 00:17:01,003
that is was my fault
that we were spitballing.
372
00:17:01,017 --> 00:17:03,253
Spitballing's when you're
throwing ideas around.
373
00:17:03,836 --> 00:17:05,952
Just tell them Gigi was with me.
374
00:17:06,067 --> 00:17:07,182
Yeah, I will.
375
00:17:07,938 --> 00:17:10,231
Oh gosh, look at this, Mickey.
376
00:17:10,578 --> 00:17:12,853
- It's not coming out.
- Keep patting, it'll come out.
377
00:17:12,867 --> 00:17:14,500
- Why can't I pull it out ?
- No no.
378
00:17:14,826 --> 00:17:17,852
- Because it'll go all through it.
- We have to shampoo my hair.
379
00:17:17,897 --> 00:17:21,271
Okay, we can do that.
It came out, it'll come out.
380
00:17:21,587 --> 00:17:22,430
All right.
381
00:17:26,737 --> 00:17:29,421
Oh god. It's 3:00 in the morning.
382
00:17:29,568 --> 00:17:33,060
Valérie, I told you the puppy
does not like being in that crate.
383
00:17:33,076 --> 00:17:34,642
- Well.
- The book said it could take
384
00:17:34,668 --> 00:17:37,010
- Up to two weeks for them to acclimate.
- Oh.
385
00:17:37,038 --> 00:17:39,240
- They miss their mothers.
- What do you want me to do ?
386
00:17:39,256 --> 00:17:41,830
Crawl in there and nurse it myself ?
387
00:17:41,868 --> 00:17:45,160
I don't know why you got a
puppy anyway, they're a lot of work.
388
00:17:45,177 --> 00:17:48,402
Yeah, that's right. Everything
worthwhile is a lot of work.
389
00:17:48,855 --> 00:17:51,863
- What are you doing ?
- I'm going to bring the puppy into bed with us.
390
00:17:51,927 --> 00:17:53,130
No, we're not allowed.
391
00:17:53,186 --> 00:17:56,631
Valérie... we can do whatever we want.
392
00:17:57,748 --> 00:18:00,343
- All right, well.
- Come here.
393
00:18:00,616 --> 00:18:02,502
- Calm down.
- You're being trained tomorrow.
394
00:18:02,878 --> 00:18:04,890
All right, good night, marky-Mark.
395
00:18:04,938 --> 00:18:06,992
- Good night.
- Good night, puppy.
396
00:18:07,016 --> 00:18:09,201
- Yeah. Oh ! It happened.
- What ?
397
00:18:09,225 --> 00:18:11,202
- It bit it. It scratched my face.
- Where ?
398
00:18:11,225 --> 00:18:13,521
- Oh god, under my nose. Is it bleeding ?
- No.
399
00:18:13,547 --> 00:18:16,282
- Well it's wet. I feel blood.
- You're not bleeding.
400
00:18:17,466 --> 00:18:19,732
You know what ?
I can't- I can't risk it.
401
00:18:19,768 --> 00:18:21,730
- Where are you going ?
- I can't, Mark.
402
00:18:21,987 --> 00:18:24,571
I gotta go somewhere else
'cause I'm shooting tomorrow.
403
00:18:24,598 --> 00:18:26,340
If i stay in here, I'm gonna get mauled.
404
00:18:26,706 --> 00:18:28,803
- I'll sleep in another room.
- What ?
405
00:18:29,878 --> 00:18:31,533
Don't take it personally, okay ?
406
00:18:38,168 --> 00:18:40,773
- Do you want a section ?
- Oh, no thank you.
407
00:18:44,817 --> 00:18:46,333
She's usually down by now.
408
00:18:51,975 --> 00:18:54,273
- Good morning.
- Good morning.
409
00:18:54,597 --> 00:18:55,982
Okay, all right.
410
00:18:56,337 --> 00:18:57,380
Come on.
411
00:18:57,718 --> 00:18:59,323
Puppy doesn't like the leash.
412
00:19:00,325 --> 00:19:04,181
- Your script came.
- Oh, okay. Here we go.
413
00:19:04,608 --> 00:19:06,372
- Can i ask you a question ?
- Mm-Hmm.
414
00:19:06,406 --> 00:19:08,513
What was that all about last night ?
415
00:19:09,088 --> 00:19:10,492
All right, let me just...
416
00:19:10,545 --> 00:19:12,803
See what's going on in here, okay ?
417
00:19:16,107 --> 00:19:17,643
Okay, okay.
418
00:19:21,698 --> 00:19:24,133
Pfft. They still haven't
changed that line.
419
00:19:24,177 --> 00:19:26,122
I've never seen you like this.
420
00:19:26,745 --> 00:19:30,152
Well, we haven't been together
when I've been working.
421
00:19:30,355 --> 00:19:32,420
Val, I don't know. I just...
422
00:19:32,876 --> 00:19:35,400
It seems a lot to go through for one joke.
423
00:19:35,787 --> 00:19:37,740
It's not just one joke, mark, okay ?
424
00:19:37,777 --> 00:19:40,082
This is a character-defining line.
425
00:19:40,478 --> 00:19:43,480
And it's not likable, and if people
don't like the character,
426
00:19:43,496 --> 00:19:44,950
then she gets less and less lines
427
00:19:44,965 --> 00:19:46,671
until she fades out of the show
428
00:19:46,698 --> 00:19:49,400
and then "the comeback" has nothing
to shoot and I have nothing.
429
00:19:50,715 --> 00:19:53,130
The little trickle becomes the grand canyon.
430
00:19:53,376 --> 00:19:54,200
You know.
431
00:19:54,738 --> 00:19:56,600
It's not a tough business for nothing.
432
00:19:57,918 --> 00:19:59,452
Right ? Isn't that right ?
433
00:20:01,528 --> 00:20:02,880
Anyway, you know.
434
00:20:03,295 --> 00:20:06,161
I just need to fix this and then
it's all gonna go back to normal.
435
00:20:06,208 --> 00:20:07,090
It will.
436
00:20:08,286 --> 00:20:09,940
- So, eggs ?
- Sure.
437
00:20:10,248 --> 00:20:12,382
- Wheat toast ?
- White.
438
00:20:12,807 --> 00:20:14,360
White, okay. Oops.
439
00:20:14,845 --> 00:20:16,290
Don't know where I'm going.
440
00:20:16,475 --> 00:20:17,931
Cooking with a puppy.
441
00:20:18,665 --> 00:20:21,301
Oh, come here. Come here,
come here, come here.
442
00:20:22,105 --> 00:20:23,453
It's not sanitary.
443
00:20:30,675 --> 00:20:33,342
Oh, actually, there's Gigi. Jane ?
444
00:20:33,365 --> 00:20:35,372
It's Gigi. Hi, stranger.
445
00:20:35,415 --> 00:20:36,853
Where have you been hiding, hmm ?
446
00:20:37,077 --> 00:20:38,062
- Hi.
- Hi.
447
00:20:38,247 --> 00:20:41,423
So, I saw that puppy line is still
in the script. What happened ?
448
00:20:41,477 --> 00:20:43,311
They didn't like any of the pitches,
449
00:20:43,416 --> 00:20:46,590
And I got into trouble for going up
to your dressing room, so...
450
00:20:47,615 --> 00:20:49,090
If you wouldn't mind,
451
00:20:49,298 --> 00:20:51,531
I really rather you didn't
even bring it up because,
452
00:20:51,566 --> 00:20:52,901
Yeah, I got it. That's all right.
453
00:20:52,928 --> 00:20:55,822
They don't want you connecting
with the actors. No, I get it.
454
00:20:55,888 --> 00:20:57,113
Take care, doll.
455
00:21:01,896 --> 00:21:03,312
Jesse wood !
456
00:21:03,708 --> 00:21:05,663
- I'll see you out there.
- Okay.
457
00:21:06,258 --> 00:21:09,003
How do you feel about the joke
not changing in the script ?
458
00:21:10,337 --> 00:21:12,732
I'm trying to prepare, so really can't.
459
00:21:13,565 --> 00:21:15,662
and last, but certainly, not least,
460
00:21:15,738 --> 00:21:17,981
You loved her on the show "I'm it,"
461
00:21:18,038 --> 00:21:20,791
Here she is, Valerie Cherish !
462
00:21:39,796 --> 00:21:43,342
Okay ! Places everyone !
Scene a, apple.
463
00:21:44,107 --> 00:21:45,413
Okay, that was funny.
464
00:21:45,455 --> 00:21:48,191
Oh, 'cause I saved it
with "the robot", you know.
465
00:21:48,208 --> 00:21:51,531
You guys are great. This is
a nice, pumped audience.
466
00:21:51,596 --> 00:21:53,541
Damn, look at her puppies.
467
00:21:55,058 --> 00:21:58,553
You guys are so cute,
but I'm gonna have to hide you.
468
00:21:59,566 --> 00:22:02,883
I've got bartles & jaymes
and gouda up...
469
00:22:03,726 --> 00:22:06,340
- Cassie ?
- Aunt Sassy.
470
00:22:06,418 --> 00:22:10,710
I know we're not allowed to have pets,
but how can you say no to a box of puppies ?
471
00:22:10,877 --> 00:22:13,910
You see a box of puppies,
I see korean barbeque.
472
00:22:16,275 --> 00:22:18,050
And cut.
473
00:22:18,917 --> 00:22:20,983
Okay. Now, this is what's happening.
474
00:22:21,128 --> 00:22:23,451
Welcome aboard nosedive airlines.
475
00:22:24,598 --> 00:22:26,403
No, that's all right. They saw it.
476
00:22:26,618 --> 00:22:29,441
They're gonna...
They're gonna do something.
477
00:22:29,506 --> 00:22:31,552
I want to make sure
they change it, that's all.
478
00:22:32,627 --> 00:22:34,480
Anyway, believe me, it's all right.
479
00:22:37,756 --> 00:22:40,583
- So, yeah, that didn't get the response...
- I think you have a better...
480
00:22:40,606 --> 00:22:42,231
I think we were all hoping for.
481
00:22:42,246 --> 00:22:44,681
We're working on a new joke.
Why don't you wait over on the set ?
482
00:22:44,697 --> 00:22:46,723
- Yeah, okay.
- So cassie says,
483
00:22:46,745 --> 00:22:48,471
"How can you say no
to a box of puppies ?"
484
00:22:48,498 --> 00:22:50,930
And aunt Sassy says, "I don't
have time for puppies,
485
00:22:50,957 --> 00:22:53,312
I gotta go club some baby seals. "
486
00:22:55,628 --> 00:22:58,920
Yeah, you know, there's
another one that might work.
487
00:22:58,956 --> 00:23:01,182
Gigi came up with one,
might be cute, we could use.
488
00:23:01,728 --> 00:23:03,340
Yeah, what was it ?
489
00:23:03,415 --> 00:23:05,252
"If i let you have puppies,
490
00:23:05,255 --> 00:23:08,241
Then I have to let old Mr. Schmidt
hang his satan flag. "
491
00:23:09,636 --> 00:23:11,600
- What the fuck is a satan flag ?
- What ?
492
00:23:12,526 --> 00:23:13,612
Well...
493
00:23:13,918 --> 00:23:15,811
- It's a convention.
- You know what ?
494
00:23:17,047 --> 00:23:18,120
Go wait with the kids on the set.
495
00:23:18,138 --> 00:23:19,292
- Okay, yeah.
- Thanks.
496
00:23:19,338 --> 00:23:21,932
That's the flag you
have in your bed, Milo.
497
00:23:22,195 --> 00:23:25,381
- Is that the one ?
- If we can't come up with something...
498
00:23:26,156 --> 00:23:30,162
Christine, I'm so sorry
if that joke offended you.
499
00:23:30,836 --> 00:23:34,182
Why would I be offended ?
I'm not korean, i'm japanese.
500
00:23:34,408 --> 00:23:36,010
Sure, no. Yeah, no. I knew that.
501
00:23:36,506 --> 00:23:38,211
I meant, you know,
502
00:23:38,236 --> 00:23:41,051
Just didn't want to offend
any of your korean friends.
503
00:23:41,887 --> 00:23:43,891
Why do you assume
I have korean friends ?
504
00:23:45,738 --> 00:23:47,001
Do I need powder ?
505
00:23:47,546 --> 00:23:48,811
- You're fine.
- Okay.
506
00:23:50,726 --> 00:23:51,782
Always fine.
507
00:23:52,965 --> 00:23:55,210
- Gigi, you got something ?
- Yes.
508
00:23:55,287 --> 00:23:57,380
Here's the new line.
And they want you to say it
509
00:23:57,406 --> 00:23:59,380
Exactly like this.
510
00:23:59,717 --> 00:24:01,212
Here comes "the hate show. "
511
00:24:01,246 --> 00:24:04,602
You walk in and you see
the puppies licking Cassie.
512
00:24:04,877 --> 00:24:09,251
And you say, "I haven't been
licked like that since 1943."
513
00:24:11,108 --> 00:24:13,553
The math's a little off.
That would make me a hundred.
514
00:24:13,888 --> 00:24:16,582
Um, and then they want you
to make a tiger sound.
515
00:24:17,017 --> 00:24:18,123
Can you do that ?
516
00:24:19,346 --> 00:24:20,610
Yes, I can.
517
00:24:21,326 --> 00:24:22,782
Yes, I can. Okay.
518
00:24:23,605 --> 00:24:25,953
Okay, we're gonna pick it up
from Val's entrance.
519
00:24:25,978 --> 00:24:29,051
Okay, going for a pick-up
from sassy's entrance.
520
00:24:29,087 --> 00:24:29,803
On a bell !
521
00:24:29,828 --> 00:24:32,470
So remember, cassie has
found a box of puppies...
522
00:24:32,935 --> 00:24:36,050
Scene J, apple. A, B, C camera mark.
523
00:24:36,946 --> 00:24:38,143
Stand by !
524
00:24:39,187 --> 00:24:40,160
Action !
525
00:24:41,647 --> 00:24:44,613
I've got bartles & jaymes
and gouda upstairs.
526
00:24:46,255 --> 00:24:47,073
Cassie !
527
00:24:47,116 --> 00:24:49,263
Aunt Sassy, I know we're not
supposed to have pets,
528
00:24:49,297 --> 00:24:51,913
but how can you say no
to a box of puppies ?
529
00:24:53,058 --> 00:24:56,082
I haven't been licked
like that since 1943.
530
00:25:00,597 --> 00:25:02,683
Cut it ! Bang bang, we're moving on !
531
00:25:02,755 --> 00:25:05,011
Movin'on !
532
00:25:05,846 --> 00:25:08,120
We're moving on, ladies and gentlemen.
533
00:25:08,317 --> 00:25:10,811
That's right. We only got
a couple more scenes to do.
534
00:25:10,846 --> 00:25:14,383
And in baseball we call this
the seventh-inning stretch.
535
00:25:14,717 --> 00:25:16,993
And if you don't know
baseball, then it's a...
536
00:25:17,048 --> 00:25:19,131
Sit-down pilates class.
537
00:25:29,197 --> 00:25:30,702
Is that Paulie ?
538
00:25:30,918 --> 00:25:32,411
Jane, that's Paulie G.
539
00:25:32,827 --> 00:25:36,552
That's Paulie G. Paulie, Paulie ! Hi.
540
00:25:36,787 --> 00:25:40,580
Listen, just want to say thank you
so much for changing that line.
541
00:25:40,656 --> 00:25:43,883
You know, and thinking on your feet
like that, that was, you know.
542
00:25:43,896 --> 00:25:46,380
And "grrrrr"... Very fun to do, so...
543
00:25:46,445 --> 00:25:49,232
Just thank you so much,
I really really enjoyed it.
544
00:25:49,406 --> 00:25:52,580
Ahem, you know. Don't hate me.
545
00:25:52,655 --> 00:25:54,132
Okay ? You can't hate me.
546
00:25:54,955 --> 00:25:57,391
It's one joke. That's not fair, you know.
547
00:25:57,555 --> 00:25:59,893
It's not who I am.
That's not who I am, you know.
548
00:25:59,906 --> 00:26:02,713
I'm a team player and I'm a hard worker.
549
00:26:02,898 --> 00:26:05,101
I'm the one who buys gifts
for all the crew, you know.
550
00:26:05,106 --> 00:26:07,663
That's who I am,
that's who I am, so...
551
00:26:07,987 --> 00:26:10,890
All right, have a good...
Have a good night.
552
00:26:13,518 --> 00:26:16,853
Okay. I just wanted to thank him,
553
00:26:16,867 --> 00:26:18,341
Ahem, you know, 'cause he really...
554
00:26:18,415 --> 00:26:21,331
He loved that puppy killer line so much.
555
00:26:21,518 --> 00:26:23,061
So, you know...
556
00:26:23,757 --> 00:26:27,092
Someone works real hard,
then it's important to acknowledge it,
557
00:26:27,165 --> 00:26:28,701
You know ? It's just important.
558
00:26:29,336 --> 00:26:31,903
All right, I'll see you all
back at the ranch.
559
00:26:38,115 --> 00:26:41,031
* I wanna be loved by you *
560
00:26:41,046 --> 00:26:45,063
* just you, nobody else but you *
561
00:26:45,687 --> 00:26:48,481
* i wanna be loved by you... *
562
00:26:48,805 --> 00:26:50,561
* alone *
563
00:26:50,596 --> 00:26:52,591
* poopoobee doo... *
564
00:26:52,996 --> 00:26:56,051
I don't have the puppy.
Did you see the puppy ?
565
00:26:56,198 --> 00:26:58,421
Puppy ! Okay okay okay.
566
00:26:58,556 --> 00:27:00,662
- It's okay, it's okay.
- I didn't even see her.
567
00:27:00,685 --> 00:27:03,211
Ooh, I thought someone
had put her in the car.
568
00:27:03,288 --> 00:27:04,212
That is way too close.
569
00:27:04,237 --> 00:27:06,991
- You guys have to be more careful.
- Yeah, just more careful,
570
00:27:07,007 --> 00:27:09,171
'Cause I thought I'd lost you, yeah.
571
00:27:09,575 --> 00:27:13,242
You know, 'cause that was close.
You know, it was too close.
572
00:27:13,575 --> 00:27:14,692
It really was.
573
00:27:16,038 --> 00:27:19,070
Jane, do you want to take the...
Take the puppy ?
574
00:27:19,206 --> 00:27:22,112
- Me ?
- Yeah, you love dogs, you know.
575
00:27:22,556 --> 00:27:23,932
Please, take me home.
576
00:27:25,766 --> 00:27:27,330
You should just take it.
577
00:27:27,415 --> 00:27:29,170
He peed on me. Okay, here we go.
578
00:27:29,208 --> 00:27:33,272
Does anyone have a paper towel
or napkin something ?
579
00:27:34,597 --> 00:27:36,991
Thanks. It's just a little bit, you know...
580
00:27:37,298 --> 00:27:39,530
All right, I'll take her, I'll take her.
581
00:27:39,597 --> 00:27:41,732
You will take her ?
Oh, that's great news.
582
00:27:41,748 --> 00:27:45,201
Okay, good. Big load
off my mind, really is.
583
00:27:45,517 --> 00:27:48,193
Good, 'cause you know if I bring
this puppy dog home again tomorrow
584
00:27:48,205 --> 00:27:51,091
It really will be korean
barbeque. You know ?
585
00:27:51,436 --> 00:27:54,423
Okay. Bye, puppy,
enjoy your new home.
586
00:27:55,127 --> 00:27:57,661
All right, gang, I'll have
this dry-cleaned for you.
587
00:27:58,517 --> 00:27:59,500
All right.
588
00:28:03,776 --> 00:28:06,671
That's it, that makes...
I feel better about that.
589
00:28:07,317 --> 00:28:08,591
Bye, puppy.
590
00:28:08,766 --> 00:28:12,072
Transcript: Raceman
591
00:28:12,417 --> 00:28:16,742
Synchro: Seth Cohen
592
00:28:17,177 --> 00:28:24,782
www. forom. com
593
00:28:24,832 --> 00:28:29,382
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