All language subtitles for Dear David (2023) hoetinkhof79

af Afrikaans
ak Akan
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bem Bemba
bn Bengali
bh Bihari
bs Bosnian
br Breton
bg Bulgarian
km Cambodian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
chr Cherokee
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch Download
en English
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
ee Ewe
fo Faroese
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gaa Ga
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gn Guarani
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ia Interlingua
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
rw Kinyarwanda
rn Kirundi
kg Kongo
ko Korean
kri Krio (Sierra Leone)
ku Kurdish
ckb Kurdish (Soranî)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Laothian
la Latin
lv Latvian
ln Lingala
lt Lithuanian
loz Lozi
lg Luganda
ach Luo
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam Download
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mfe Mauritian Creole
mo Moldavian
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
sr-ME Montenegrin
ne Nepali
pcm Nigerian Pidgin
nso Northern Sotho
no Norwegian
nn Norwegian (Nynorsk)
oc Occitan
or Oriya
om Oromo
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt-BR Portuguese (Brazil)
pt Portuguese (Portugal)
pa Punjabi
qu Quechua
ro Romanian
rm Romansh
nyn Runyakitara
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
sh Serbo-Croatian
st Sesotho
tn Setswana
crs Seychellois Creole
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhalese
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
es-419 Spanish (Latin American)
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
tt Tatar
te Telugu
th Thai
ti Tigrinya
to Tonga
lua Tshiluba
tum Tumbuka
tr Turkish
tk Turkmen
tw Twi
ug Uighur
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
wo Wolof
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000 Downloaded from YTS.MX 2 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000 Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX 3 00:01:17,685 --> 00:01:22,122 20, 40, 60, 80... 4 00:01:23,123 --> 00:01:24,759 -I'm telling you, Linda. -...100. 5 00:01:24,891 --> 00:01:28,596 It'll be all about the Internet, this will pay off big time. 6 00:01:28,729 --> 00:01:29,963 Uh-huh? 7 00:01:32,366 --> 00:01:34,834 You know how many people are online? 8 00:01:34,968 --> 00:01:39,105 35,977,000. 9 00:01:42,777 --> 00:01:46,614 I'm just saying that people are gonna go crazy over this. 10 00:01:46,747 --> 00:01:50,016 I mean, look at David. He loves those computers. 11 00:01:50,850 --> 00:01:52,586 Where is he anyway? 12 00:01:53,421 --> 00:01:54,954 Where do you think? 13 00:01:55,088 --> 00:01:58,858 In the basement again? I'm getting worried about him. 14 00:02:30,924 --> 00:02:32,326 Gosh. 15 00:02:32,460 --> 00:02:35,128 Sorry, I didn't mean to frighten you. 16 00:02:35,262 --> 00:02:37,163 It's past your bedtime, okay? 17 00:02:37,298 --> 00:02:41,134 So say good-night to your cyber friends and you get to bed, okay? 18 00:03:09,129 --> 00:03:12,932 Why are you so mean? 19 00:05:39,313 --> 00:05:41,782 Ellis, hands off the keyboard! 20 00:05:42,950 --> 00:05:47,388 Engaging with trolls is like the worst possible use of your energy. 21 00:05:49,523 --> 00:05:51,592 You're doing your angry typing thing again. 22 00:05:51,725 --> 00:05:53,961 Okay. I'll just delete his comment then. 23 00:05:54,093 --> 00:05:56,195 Oh, yeah, I'm sure that's the last time you'll hear about it. 24 00:05:56,330 --> 00:05:57,398 Oh, my God, so I should-- 25 00:05:57,531 --> 00:05:59,600 -Ignore it! -Ignore it! 26 00:05:59,733 --> 00:06:02,903 If you feed the trolls, they will grow in power and destroy you. 27 00:06:05,039 --> 00:06:07,408 - Okay. Have any of you got this email? - What email? 28 00:06:07,541 --> 00:06:09,610 No, what is it? 29 00:06:09,743 --> 00:06:13,079 Ah, cool, it's one of those things where if you look at it long enough, 30 00:06:13,212 --> 00:06:15,349 you'll see a picture. 31 00:06:18,752 --> 00:06:20,219 Oh, my God. 32 00:06:21,087 --> 00:06:22,656 Were you filming that? 33 00:06:23,357 --> 00:06:24,858 That was trendworthy. 34 00:06:24,992 --> 00:06:27,561 Hey, BuzzFeeders! Quick word. 35 00:06:27,695 --> 00:06:31,432 Uh, just read an article about a young man 36 00:06:31,565 --> 00:06:33,834 who woke up after being in a coma for 21 years. 37 00:06:35,536 --> 00:06:37,438 Here's the uncool part, I read it on Vice! 38 00:06:37,571 --> 00:06:39,473 Oh, dude. 39 00:06:39,607 --> 00:06:42,076 Come on! Guys, we should be on that. 40 00:06:42,208 --> 00:06:43,711 This is our kind of shit! 41 00:06:43,844 --> 00:06:46,580 Uh, "27 Surprising Places to Eat in New York City 42 00:06:46,714 --> 00:06:48,549 if You've Just Woken Up From a Coma." 43 00:06:48,682 --> 00:06:50,985 But better, obviously. 44 00:06:51,117 --> 00:06:52,586 Adam E. 45 00:06:52,720 --> 00:06:54,555 Just going over your performance metrics 46 00:06:54,688 --> 00:06:58,659 and the general audience sentiment shows that your content is, 47 00:06:58,792 --> 00:07:00,828 well, for lack of better words, relatable AF. 48 00:07:00,961 --> 00:07:04,064 Here's the less good part, not as great, 49 00:07:04,197 --> 00:07:05,666 your reach is kind of lame. 50 00:07:05,799 --> 00:07:07,034 It's not a criticism, 51 00:07:07,166 --> 00:07:08,369 it's just something to consider. 52 00:07:08,502 --> 00:07:10,337 We'd like to get those numbers up. 53 00:07:10,471 --> 00:07:13,707 For example, right now your views are lagging way behind Norris's lists. 54 00:07:14,108 --> 00:07:15,342 Yes! 55 00:07:15,476 --> 00:07:17,845 I knew my "Top Ten Buffy Episodes 56 00:07:17,978 --> 00:07:19,546 and What Your Favorite Says About You" 57 00:07:19,680 --> 00:07:21,782 would totally slay. 58 00:07:21,915 --> 00:07:24,885 Get it, slay? Like-- you know, like vampire slayer. 59 00:07:25,019 --> 00:07:26,920 Yes! I'm dead, I'm so dead. It's sick, huh? 60 00:07:27,054 --> 00:07:30,090 - You've been sitting on that one. 61 00:07:30,224 --> 00:07:31,792 Yeah, I have. Yeah, I wanted to-- 62 00:07:31,925 --> 00:07:33,560 I wanted to raise the stakes up so, just for-- 63 00:07:33,694 --> 00:07:35,562 Oh, that's two! For you. Yeah, boom. 64 00:07:35,696 --> 00:07:38,499 Very funny, Norris. But you don't have to celebrate it, okay? 65 00:07:38,632 --> 00:07:40,901 Take the compliment, internalize it. Absolutely. 66 00:07:41,035 --> 00:07:42,336 Feel good about it. Yeah. 67 00:07:42,469 --> 00:07:43,671 But we don't want to make people feel bad. 68 00:07:43,804 --> 00:07:45,072 Absolutely. Lock it up. 69 00:07:45,239 --> 00:07:47,775 You're behind that pun machine. 70 00:07:47,908 --> 00:07:49,610 Way behind. 71 00:07:49,743 --> 00:07:52,946 I'd love to see some more authentic original content from you. 72 00:07:53,080 --> 00:07:55,149 - Yeah. -People really dig when you reveal 73 00:07:55,282 --> 00:07:57,685 -the funny, painful truth about stuff. -Right. 74 00:07:57,818 --> 00:08:01,488 Yeah? So maybe try that, yeah? Cool. Okay, Evelyn, great. 75 00:08:05,859 --> 00:08:09,163 He said the same thing to Carmen two weeks ago. 76 00:08:09,296 --> 00:08:11,832 Carmen who got fired a week ago? 77 00:08:13,400 --> 00:08:14,902 -Yeah. -Yeah. 78 00:08:15,903 --> 00:08:17,938 But it's gonna be okay. 79 00:08:21,542 --> 00:08:23,343 "Try to make your comics have more pain-- 80 00:08:23,477 --> 00:08:25,479 but funny pain." 81 00:08:25,612 --> 00:08:28,015 "But not so funny they lose the pain." 82 00:08:28,148 --> 00:08:29,450 Oh, come on, you can do that. 83 00:08:29,583 --> 00:08:31,385 "You make it relatable and inclusive." 84 00:08:31,518 --> 00:08:35,622 Inclusive? AKA, gay. 85 00:08:35,756 --> 00:08:36,824 Gay. 86 00:08:39,760 --> 00:08:42,563 You were pretty restless last night. 87 00:08:44,531 --> 00:08:45,866 Yeah? Yeah. 88 00:08:48,869 --> 00:08:51,271 Adam, I can sleep back at my own place. 89 00:08:51,405 --> 00:08:53,474 You know, you can just tell me. 90 00:08:54,908 --> 00:08:58,378 No, it's not that. Really, it's not that. 91 00:08:59,980 --> 00:09:01,682 I was thinking, 92 00:09:01,815 --> 00:09:04,318 I know that you and your mom aren't close, 93 00:09:04,451 --> 00:09:07,988 but maybe it's time I got to meet her. 94 00:09:09,123 --> 00:09:10,524 If-- If you want. 95 00:09:11,525 --> 00:09:13,761 I don't know. I-- I, um... 96 00:09:15,329 --> 00:09:16,964 You don't want to meet my mom. 97 00:09:19,032 --> 00:09:22,102 You think I'm crazy, you ain't seen nothing. 98 00:09:22,736 --> 00:09:24,471 You know I love you, right? 99 00:09:36,283 --> 00:09:40,221 I know it's only been a few hours, but I think I love you. 100 00:09:42,122 --> 00:09:44,725 Oh, shit, he's responding. "I think I love you too." 101 00:09:44,858 --> 00:09:46,627 Yo, he loves you, he loves you! 102 00:09:46,760 --> 00:09:49,029 Wait, wait, wait, wait. 103 00:09:49,163 --> 00:09:50,964 Do you wanna hold me? 104 00:09:54,201 --> 00:09:55,636 Ew. 105 00:09:55,769 --> 00:09:57,805 Do you wanna make out with a 14-year-old boy? 106 00:10:02,142 --> 00:10:05,212 And we're blocked. Yes! 107 00:10:05,345 --> 00:10:08,549 Okay. Sports Chat? 108 00:10:09,416 --> 00:10:10,584 This one. 109 00:10:10,717 --> 00:10:13,687 "Hi, I'm David. Ask me anything." 110 00:10:13,821 --> 00:10:18,692 "Chat room rules. No bullying. No bad language." What? 111 00:10:18,826 --> 00:10:21,094 Yeah, this guy's asking for it. 112 00:10:21,929 --> 00:10:24,932 "Ask only two questions, but never three." 113 00:10:25,666 --> 00:10:27,434 Dude, this is hilarious. 114 00:10:28,303 --> 00:10:29,536 All right. 115 00:10:29,670 --> 00:10:34,575 Dear David, why are you such a loser? 116 00:10:36,376 --> 00:10:39,079 "I think you'd both like me if you gave me a chance." 117 00:10:39,213 --> 00:10:41,381 What-- Wait, how does he know there's two of us? 118 00:10:41,515 --> 00:10:44,685 Chill out, man. He's probably doing exactly what we're doing. 119 00:10:44,818 --> 00:10:48,355 Tell me why a loser like you shouldn't blow your brains out. 120 00:10:48,488 --> 00:10:50,190 Dude, that's pretty dark. 121 00:10:50,325 --> 00:10:53,427 Come on, man. No one takes this shit serious. 122 00:10:56,597 --> 00:10:59,334 "So I'll live to see you die." 123 00:10:59,466 --> 00:11:00,901 Dear David-- Maybe let's not. 124 00:11:01,034 --> 00:11:02,736 He said not to ask three questions. 125 00:11:02,870 --> 00:11:05,005 Maybe you shouldn't be such a pussy. 126 00:11:05,505 --> 00:11:06,406 Whatever. 127 00:11:06,540 --> 00:11:08,075 How am I going to die? 128 00:11:10,944 --> 00:11:14,548 "Alone, afraid, and wetting your bed." 129 00:11:17,484 --> 00:11:19,354 -What? Yo, that's-- -Dude. 130 00:11:24,858 --> 00:11:27,094 Dude, let's just watch Riverdale. 131 00:11:27,228 --> 00:11:30,731 -Are you bugging out because of this creep? -No. 132 00:11:41,575 --> 00:11:43,076 Oh, my God. And Beatrice? 133 00:11:43,210 --> 00:11:45,012 She just got fired as editor of Teen Vogue Online. 134 00:11:45,145 --> 00:11:46,747 Now I'm fourth in line to replace her. 135 00:11:46,880 --> 00:11:49,416 Oh! It's like Game of Thrones, 136 00:11:49,549 --> 00:11:51,585 but for a fashion-savvy social warrior. 137 00:11:51,718 --> 00:11:52,953 Here's to that. 138 00:11:54,222 --> 00:11:57,024 And Adam, at least you'll have plenty of introvert work-from-home time 139 00:11:57,157 --> 00:11:58,525 once Kyle's gone. 140 00:11:58,659 --> 00:12:01,628 Yes. Wait, what? What do you mean? 141 00:12:04,631 --> 00:12:06,433 I'm flying out to Arkansas tonight. 142 00:12:07,100 --> 00:12:09,036 Your mom! My mom's hysterectomy. 143 00:12:09,169 --> 00:12:11,905 I'm gonna help out until my sisters can get there. 144 00:12:12,039 --> 00:12:13,540 Right. Sorry. 145 00:12:13,674 --> 00:12:15,475 Well, it might do you some good. 146 00:12:15,609 --> 00:12:18,612 No distractions. Except the Internet. 147 00:12:22,250 --> 00:12:24,551 - Another drink? - Yes, please. 148 00:12:26,153 --> 00:12:28,423 Hey, I am so sorry. That was super messed up. 149 00:12:28,555 --> 00:12:30,624 I do remember, I promise. 150 00:12:30,757 --> 00:12:33,660 It's okay. All right? I get it. All right? 151 00:12:33,794 --> 00:12:35,796 We both have a lot going on right now. 152 00:12:35,929 --> 00:12:36,997 But this, 153 00:12:37,998 --> 00:12:40,834 we gotta maintain a full signal between us 154 00:12:40,968 --> 00:12:43,070 or else the call gets dropped. 155 00:12:43,203 --> 00:12:44,471 I don't want that. 156 00:12:44,604 --> 00:12:45,672 Me neither. 157 00:12:45,806 --> 00:12:46,540 Okay. 158 00:12:46,673 --> 00:12:48,175 Yeah. I'm sorry. 159 00:12:48,309 --> 00:12:49,543 It's okay. 160 00:15:19,626 --> 00:15:20,894 Ping! 161 00:15:21,962 --> 00:15:23,331 Fuckin' twat. 162 00:15:32,105 --> 00:15:34,841 Why don't you die in a fire? 163 00:15:37,445 --> 00:15:39,380 Don't judge me, you're not my mom. 164 00:15:40,381 --> 00:15:42,983 Sometimes you gotta troll the trolls. 165 00:15:52,159 --> 00:15:53,727 Internet... 166 00:15:53,860 --> 00:15:56,096 educate him. 167 00:16:21,622 --> 00:16:23,424 See? 168 00:16:23,558 --> 00:16:25,259 I'm relatable AF. 169 00:17:04,965 --> 00:17:06,467 I love you too. 170 00:17:09,869 --> 00:17:11,871 Oh, my God. 171 00:17:13,139 --> 00:17:15,509 Are you hungry? 172 00:17:18,379 --> 00:17:20,947 All right. Come on. 173 00:17:23,183 --> 00:17:26,119 I should drink and post more often. 174 00:17:59,520 --> 00:18:02,423 Please stand away from the platform edge. 175 00:19:40,388 --> 00:19:41,422 Shit. 176 00:19:47,762 --> 00:19:49,162 Thanks, man. 177 00:19:52,899 --> 00:19:54,934 Baby steps. Baby steps. 178 00:22:06,433 --> 00:22:08,167 I really didn't sleep well this weekend. 179 00:22:08,302 --> 00:22:09,937 Lonely without Kyle already? 180 00:22:10,069 --> 00:22:11,272 I had sleep paralysis. 181 00:22:11,405 --> 00:22:13,206 Hmm? It's where you wake up, 182 00:22:13,340 --> 00:22:15,409 but you can't move, but you can see. 183 00:22:15,543 --> 00:22:17,511 That's a real thing? Mm-hmm. 184 00:22:17,645 --> 00:22:19,380 Yeah, I haven't had it since my final year of college. 185 00:22:19,513 --> 00:22:21,180 It's, like, stress-related or something, 186 00:22:21,315 --> 00:22:24,251 but they say you can see things because... 187 00:22:24,385 --> 00:22:25,819 your brain is still dreaming. 188 00:22:25,953 --> 00:22:28,756 Mm-hmm. But I've never had it that bad before. 189 00:22:29,356 --> 00:22:30,858 I don't know, it-- 190 00:22:31,792 --> 00:22:34,328 it just felt very real, you know? 191 00:22:35,496 --> 00:22:37,965 Did you want me to come over at night to protect you? 192 00:22:39,967 --> 00:22:41,368 I think I'll be fine. 193 00:23:37,791 --> 00:23:39,125 Adam! 194 00:23:52,473 --> 00:23:55,376 You've seen my son, Dear David, haven't you? 195 00:23:59,880 --> 00:24:01,515 Dear David. 196 00:24:03,083 --> 00:24:04,652 You saw him. 197 00:24:07,221 --> 00:24:08,589 What does he want? 198 00:24:10,924 --> 00:24:14,762 You can ask him, but only two questions. 199 00:24:15,663 --> 00:24:16,697 Never three. 200 00:24:18,699 --> 00:24:19,733 Why? 201 00:24:20,768 --> 00:24:22,168 Ask him yourself. 202 00:24:49,096 --> 00:24:50,397 David? 203 00:25:22,663 --> 00:25:24,231 What are you doing tonight? 204 00:25:26,233 --> 00:25:28,068 This one says the ghost of a masturbating chimp 205 00:25:28,202 --> 00:25:31,739 roams the hallways of their stately home. 206 00:25:32,606 --> 00:25:35,309 There are actually a lot of weirdos out there. 207 00:25:37,377 --> 00:25:40,013 Not you. You're under a lot of pressure. 208 00:25:40,147 --> 00:25:41,248 Hmm. 209 00:25:41,381 --> 00:25:43,383 It's your turn. Okay. 210 00:25:46,253 --> 00:25:48,422 I feel like this game is trying to tell me something. 211 00:25:48,555 --> 00:25:49,790 What do you think? 212 00:25:50,958 --> 00:25:52,459 A hundred percent. Hmm. 213 00:25:52,593 --> 00:25:54,361 That you're a total failure. I'm a total failure. 214 00:25:54,495 --> 00:25:55,829 Mm-hmm. Yeah, thought so. 215 00:25:55,963 --> 00:25:57,831 You should have let me bring my Ouija board over. 216 00:25:57,965 --> 00:26:00,968 Then we'd really figure out what's bothering you. 217 00:26:01,101 --> 00:26:03,871 I'm not trying to invite more paranormal activity, 218 00:26:04,004 --> 00:26:05,139 thank you very much. 219 00:26:12,412 --> 00:26:13,981 It's just the cats. 220 00:26:18,852 --> 00:26:20,053 Are you serious? 221 00:26:22,055 --> 00:26:25,359 Ellis. Oh, my God. 222 00:26:30,798 --> 00:26:32,466 -That's really weird. -What is? 223 00:26:32,599 --> 00:26:34,301 They don't want me to touch it. 224 00:26:34,434 --> 00:26:36,537 - Oh! - No! 225 00:26:41,508 --> 00:26:43,677 It's just a camera. 226 00:26:50,751 --> 00:26:54,555 It even takes photos like a real camera. 227 00:26:54,688 --> 00:26:56,723 I should go and get some work done. 228 00:26:59,927 --> 00:27:01,395 Get some sleep. 229 00:27:01,528 --> 00:27:04,565 Dream of hot men, not dead boys. 230 00:27:28,856 --> 00:27:30,490 Hey, you. How's it going? 231 00:27:30,624 --> 00:27:32,192 My mom's home, she's good. 232 00:27:32,293 --> 00:27:34,728 Although struggling to go number two. 233 00:27:34,862 --> 00:27:36,530 We bought her all kinds of fiber supplements... 234 00:27:36,663 --> 00:27:38,131 What the hell? 235 00:27:38,233 --> 00:27:39,533 ...but we don't want her to burst her stitches. 236 00:27:39,633 --> 00:27:41,001 - Ew. God. - Love yo-- 237 00:27:42,169 --> 00:27:43,604 Not now, Kyle. 238 00:28:29,250 --> 00:28:31,451 No. People will think I'm nuts. 239 00:30:06,947 --> 00:30:10,650 Who are you? 240 00:30:15,390 --> 00:30:16,957 Just a follower. 241 00:31:00,934 --> 00:31:02,135 You guys moving out? 242 00:31:02,602 --> 00:31:04,071 Uh, sure are. 243 00:31:04,871 --> 00:31:06,507 Any particular reason? 244 00:31:06,640 --> 00:31:08,242 Like, uh, I don't know, 245 00:31:08,376 --> 00:31:11,678 bad dreams, or a creepy kid in the corner of the room? 246 00:31:11,812 --> 00:31:14,047 Half a head? 247 00:31:14,748 --> 00:31:17,318 -Nah, bro. -We're moving upstate. 248 00:31:17,452 --> 00:31:18,419 Oh. 249 00:31:18,553 --> 00:31:19,786 Good luck. 250 00:31:33,301 --> 00:31:35,936 And even if you are right and it's all in my head 251 00:31:36,069 --> 00:31:37,505 and I'm just a crazy person, 252 00:31:37,637 --> 00:31:38,805 look how big this apartment is. 253 00:31:38,939 --> 00:31:40,841 It's a win-win, baby! 254 00:31:40,974 --> 00:31:44,911 Hmm. I think they recommend moving further than just up the stairs. 255 00:31:45,946 --> 00:31:49,584 Oh, and, hey, no more sex sounds above you. 256 00:31:50,518 --> 00:31:52,487 Downstairs is available if you want to hear mine. 257 00:31:52,619 --> 00:31:54,489 Ew, gross. 258 00:31:54,621 --> 00:31:55,789 That's homophobia. 259 00:31:55,922 --> 00:31:57,358 No, it's not! 260 00:31:57,791 --> 00:31:59,092 Oh, my God. 261 00:32:00,827 --> 00:32:02,497 What is this? Oh, God. 262 00:32:02,629 --> 00:32:04,164 Is that you? Mm-hmm. 263 00:32:04,298 --> 00:32:05,533 Ah! 264 00:32:05,665 --> 00:32:07,502 This is me and all of my childhood friends. 265 00:32:07,634 --> 00:32:11,905 That's my best friend Link and we're saving the Princess Zelda. 266 00:32:12,038 --> 00:32:15,008 -Oh, my God, you had an imaginary friend. -Hmm. 267 00:32:15,142 --> 00:32:18,379 That's such an only child thing. Hmm. Yeah, I know. 268 00:32:18,513 --> 00:32:21,582 No wonder you looked so lost and lonely before I adopted you at work. 269 00:32:21,715 --> 00:32:23,016 Hmm. 270 00:32:55,048 --> 00:32:58,218 Hey, babies. What are you looking at? 271 00:33:01,255 --> 00:33:03,357 What the hell are you looking at? 272 00:33:21,141 --> 00:33:23,277 Shit. 273 00:33:24,010 --> 00:33:26,046 Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit. 274 00:33:36,257 --> 00:33:37,291 What? 275 00:33:38,124 --> 00:33:40,294 Are you fucking kidding me? 276 00:33:40,827 --> 00:33:42,230 Oh, come on. 277 00:34:26,806 --> 00:34:28,242 Yes, yes, yes. 278 00:34:29,677 --> 00:34:31,044 Call, call, call. 279 00:34:34,482 --> 00:34:38,051 Come on, come on. Pick up, pick up, pick up. 280 00:34:38,719 --> 00:34:39,953 No. 281 00:34:42,423 --> 00:34:45,058 Just breathing. Breathe, breathe, breathe. 282 00:34:45,859 --> 00:34:46,793 You're okay. 283 00:35:19,327 --> 00:35:21,629 Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit. 284 00:35:21,762 --> 00:35:24,231 I don't like scary things, really, but I was, like, riveted by this. 285 00:35:24,365 --> 00:35:29,035 Oh! Speak of the devil! Adam E! There he is. 286 00:35:29,169 --> 00:35:31,238 Why didn't you tell me what you were working on? 287 00:35:31,672 --> 00:35:33,507 Uh... 288 00:35:33,641 --> 00:35:36,377 -Uh, what am I working on? -All right, Mr. Modest. 289 00:35:36,510 --> 00:35:39,879 This Dear David story, it's crazy good. 290 00:35:40,013 --> 00:35:42,416 It feels personal, but, uh, digestible. 291 00:35:42,550 --> 00:35:44,819 It's fresh. It's like a whole new format. 292 00:35:44,951 --> 00:35:48,988 I was telling these guys, I was afraid to leave my room last night. 293 00:35:50,791 --> 00:35:53,294 So, um, yeah, so that-- 294 00:35:53,427 --> 00:35:56,196 so that story is-- is actually happening. 295 00:35:56,330 --> 00:35:58,198 It's totally happening. 296 00:35:58,332 --> 00:35:59,800 It's rad too. I like how you're bringing that back. 297 00:35:59,933 --> 00:36:01,469 It's like what we talked about. 298 00:36:01,602 --> 00:36:04,104 I'm not taking credit for this, but I told you. 299 00:36:04,238 --> 00:36:05,606 It's not just about the pep talk, 300 00:36:05,740 --> 00:36:07,608 you had to dig in and find it, and you did. 301 00:36:07,742 --> 00:36:09,310 In fact, I'm gonna spotlight it on the home page, 302 00:36:09,443 --> 00:36:11,479 so I want you to put something together. 303 00:36:11,612 --> 00:36:15,181 You know, liven it up with some-- some GIFs and memes and stuff. 304 00:36:15,316 --> 00:36:17,818 You're good at that. Make it fun. Okay? 305 00:36:17,951 --> 00:36:19,520 -Norris, go ahead. -Uh... 306 00:36:19,653 --> 00:36:22,690 "Top Ten Reasons Why Dawson From Dawson's Creek 307 00:36:22,823 --> 00:36:24,558 is a Little Bitch Boy." 308 00:36:24,692 --> 00:36:26,926 - Ooh. The word "bitch" might be-- -Too much, yeah. 309 00:36:37,438 --> 00:36:38,672 This feels wrong. 310 00:36:38,806 --> 00:36:40,508 It feels dirty or something. I don't know. 311 00:36:42,075 --> 00:36:44,345 Not fun dirty, bad dirty. 312 00:36:48,114 --> 00:36:50,216 Let them vote on what you do next. 313 00:36:50,351 --> 00:36:52,486 That's a really good idea. Mm-hmm. 314 00:36:55,756 --> 00:36:57,691 Number one, Ouija board? 315 00:36:58,592 --> 00:36:59,959 Definitely. 316 00:37:00,093 --> 00:37:02,830 Number two, hire a medium? I like that one. 317 00:37:02,962 --> 00:37:04,164 Mm-hmm. I don't hate it. 318 00:37:04,298 --> 00:37:05,433 - Mm-hmm. - Okay. 319 00:37:05,566 --> 00:37:06,801 It's a good number two. 320 00:37:06,933 --> 00:37:08,134 Three. 321 00:37:09,068 --> 00:37:11,806 Oh, my God. You have to pick that one. 322 00:37:11,938 --> 00:37:13,240 For real? Mm-hmm! 323 00:37:20,980 --> 00:37:22,982 I rid you of evil. 324 00:37:23,617 --> 00:37:25,252 I rid you of evil. 325 00:37:27,221 --> 00:37:29,457 I rid you of evil. 326 00:37:30,089 --> 00:37:32,460 I rid you of evil! 327 00:37:36,029 --> 00:37:37,465 I don't remember inviting you over. 328 00:37:37,598 --> 00:37:40,668 Please, I'm the least of your uninvited problems. 329 00:37:40,801 --> 00:37:42,269 Ooh. 330 00:37:42,403 --> 00:37:45,138 Someone says that I should get a sleep talk app 331 00:37:45,272 --> 00:37:47,541 to record what happens at night. 332 00:37:47,675 --> 00:37:49,376 I like it. Hmm. 333 00:37:49,510 --> 00:37:51,312 I think I might do that tonight. 334 00:37:51,445 --> 00:37:55,048 Maybe Dear David is like Link? 335 00:37:55,181 --> 00:37:57,284 Just another imaginary friend. 336 00:37:57,418 --> 00:37:59,052 He's not imaginary. 337 00:37:59,185 --> 00:38:01,455 Uh, what does Kyle think? 338 00:38:04,123 --> 00:38:05,459 I don't know. 339 00:38:06,861 --> 00:38:09,563 I haven't spoken to him in a while, he's MIA on this whole trip. 340 00:38:09,697 --> 00:38:11,064 I think he's mad at me. 341 00:38:11,765 --> 00:38:13,300 Why would he be mad at you? 342 00:38:14,969 --> 00:38:16,637 I haven't called him back. 343 00:38:25,178 --> 00:38:26,614 Okay, fine, if you must know, 344 00:38:26,747 --> 00:38:28,349 it's because he keeps saying "I love you" 345 00:38:28,482 --> 00:38:29,783 and I don't know how to respond to that. 346 00:38:29,917 --> 00:38:31,385 Okay? That's why. 347 00:38:31,519 --> 00:38:33,821 If you don't wanna listen to Kyle and his feelings, 348 00:38:33,954 --> 00:38:37,491 then he's not gonna be there for you and your ghost problems. 349 00:40:28,969 --> 00:40:32,606 What... do you... 350 00:40:34,308 --> 00:40:36,644 want from me? 351 00:40:48,956 --> 00:40:50,357 That's two! 352 00:41:29,997 --> 00:41:31,665 What do you... 353 00:41:33,467 --> 00:41:35,135 want from me? 354 00:41:35,669 --> 00:41:37,404 That's two! 355 00:41:51,819 --> 00:41:53,754 What the hell is that? 356 00:43:11,298 --> 00:43:14,401 - Adam, Adam. - It's me, it's me. 357 00:43:17,272 --> 00:43:19,039 What the hell is going on? 358 00:43:21,276 --> 00:43:22,609 It's me. 359 00:43:29,983 --> 00:43:33,387 That's it. That's everything, I hope. 360 00:43:34,621 --> 00:43:37,324 You know why I love your comics so much? 361 00:43:37,858 --> 00:43:39,359 Why? 362 00:43:39,493 --> 00:43:42,429 It's the only way I feel like I actually get to know you. 363 00:43:42,563 --> 00:43:44,431 My cartoons do the talking for me, 364 00:43:44,565 --> 00:43:46,400 there's nothing wrong with that. 365 00:43:46,533 --> 00:43:49,237 There is when you never actually say anything that's real. 366 00:43:49,369 --> 00:43:50,737 That is so unfair. 367 00:43:50,871 --> 00:43:52,506 Maybe you never listen when I do, 368 00:43:52,639 --> 00:43:54,141 but I talk to you a lot. 369 00:43:54,775 --> 00:43:58,145 Sure, in sarcasm and memes. 370 00:43:58,279 --> 00:44:03,550 Which is cute until my friends ask me if a ghost is haunting me too, 371 00:44:03,684 --> 00:44:05,652 and I have no idea what they're talking about 372 00:44:05,786 --> 00:44:08,522 until I see this shit online like one of your... 373 00:44:08,655 --> 00:44:09,923 fucking followers. 374 00:44:10,057 --> 00:44:12,025 I tried calling, you were blowing me off. 375 00:44:12,159 --> 00:44:14,194 I thought you were mad at me, I was giving you space. 376 00:44:14,329 --> 00:44:16,730 I've been calling. Texting. 377 00:44:17,397 --> 00:44:18,632 Look. 378 00:44:19,800 --> 00:44:23,837 You moved apartments and didn't say anything to me. 379 00:44:25,306 --> 00:44:27,374 And then Jaxon sends me this. 380 00:44:28,575 --> 00:44:30,410 He found it last week. 381 00:44:30,544 --> 00:44:32,247 I'm not on Grindr. 382 00:44:32,379 --> 00:44:34,214 Someone is obviously catfishing me. 383 00:44:34,349 --> 00:44:35,916 You can get that photo online. 384 00:44:39,287 --> 00:44:42,623 Look, I'm not on Grindr, I deleted it when we started dating. 385 00:44:47,561 --> 00:44:49,429 I didn't-- I didn't put that on there. 386 00:44:49,563 --> 00:44:50,664 I don't know how that got there. 387 00:44:50,797 --> 00:44:53,500 I promise you, I deleted it. I did. 388 00:44:54,134 --> 00:44:55,469 What the hell? 389 00:44:59,406 --> 00:45:01,141 Jesus Christ, Adam. 390 00:45:01,541 --> 00:45:03,244 Listen... 391 00:45:03,378 --> 00:45:07,414 I don't understand what you're going through right now, 392 00:45:08,548 --> 00:45:10,918 but until you sort yourself out... 393 00:45:12,287 --> 00:45:13,687 I need space. 394 00:45:15,856 --> 00:45:17,392 You're breaking up with me? 395 00:45:17,524 --> 00:45:19,126 How can I be with someone 396 00:45:19,260 --> 00:45:21,929 when I never know what's really going on with them? 397 00:46:21,888 --> 00:46:23,391 What's been going on with Adam? 398 00:46:23,523 --> 00:46:24,958 Yeah, what's going on? 399 00:46:25,092 --> 00:46:26,461 I don't-- 400 00:46:26,593 --> 00:46:28,296 - I don't know. - It's weird, right? 401 00:46:28,429 --> 00:46:30,063 Yeah, it is. I really don't know. 402 00:46:30,197 --> 00:46:31,865 We're supposed to be best friends, and-- 403 00:46:31,999 --> 00:46:34,335 Honey, nobody cares about ghosts. 404 00:46:34,469 --> 00:46:35,502 Ooh... 405 00:46:38,972 --> 00:46:40,107 Really though. 406 00:46:40,241 --> 00:46:41,975 Kyle's been saying the same thing. 407 00:46:42,109 --> 00:46:44,544 He said that Adam didn't even ask 408 00:46:44,678 --> 00:46:46,013 about his mom's surgery, 409 00:46:46,146 --> 00:46:47,581 which is weird. 410 00:46:47,714 --> 00:46:49,216 It's just not really like him. 411 00:47:05,532 --> 00:47:08,101 Please stand away from the platform edge, 412 00:47:08,201 --> 00:47:11,138 especially when trains enter and leave the station. 413 00:48:36,990 --> 00:48:38,292 Yes! Yes! 414 00:48:43,431 --> 00:48:45,266 Shit, shit. Oh, my God. 415 00:48:45,399 --> 00:48:49,069 Whoa. No, no. No, no, no. God. Stop, stop. 416 00:48:49,202 --> 00:48:50,871 -No, no, no. - No, no, no. 417 00:48:50,971 --> 00:48:53,840 Oh, my God. Whoa. 418 00:48:55,709 --> 00:48:56,943 No. 419 00:48:57,777 --> 00:48:59,045 Oh, fuck it. 420 00:49:02,617 --> 00:49:04,285 I'm not on Grindr. I deleted it. 421 00:49:04,385 --> 00:49:06,019 He's not imaginary. Oh, my God. 422 00:49:06,153 --> 00:49:08,088 Because he keeps saying "I love you." 423 00:49:26,440 --> 00:49:27,774 What? 424 00:51:54,954 --> 00:51:58,492 I've told you to go to bed three times and I find you looking at this? 425 00:51:58,626 --> 00:52:01,295 What's wrong with you, David? 426 00:52:01,429 --> 00:52:03,397 Why are you looking at this filth? 427 00:52:04,732 --> 00:52:06,132 Answer me! 428 00:52:06,966 --> 00:52:08,402 What's wrong with you? 429 00:52:21,382 --> 00:52:22,516 David? 430 00:52:23,216 --> 00:52:26,354 Oh, my God! Please stop. 431 00:52:26,487 --> 00:52:27,854 Please stop. 432 00:53:50,337 --> 00:53:53,541 You owe me big time for covering for you at work yesterday. 433 00:53:55,276 --> 00:53:57,511 You know it's not all about your followers? 434 00:53:59,045 --> 00:54:00,481 Hello? 435 00:54:01,382 --> 00:54:04,385 Is everything okay? Do you know how to find out 436 00:54:04,518 --> 00:54:06,654 who this handle belongs to? 437 00:54:06,787 --> 00:54:09,256 You really think a weird account is haunting your apartment? 438 00:54:09,390 --> 00:54:11,525 I woke up hanging out of the fucking window last night. 439 00:54:11,659 --> 00:54:12,726 It's not a joke. 440 00:54:14,127 --> 00:54:15,962 Are you serious? 441 00:54:16,095 --> 00:54:18,732 You didn't put that in your thread. 'Cause it's too insane. 442 00:54:19,567 --> 00:54:21,201 Maybe you should see a doctor or something, 443 00:54:21,335 --> 00:54:23,704 do a sleep study before you really hurt yourself. 444 00:54:24,805 --> 00:54:26,474 I'm fine, I just... 445 00:54:27,341 --> 00:54:29,042 need to find out who this is. 446 00:54:30,076 --> 00:54:31,712 Ask Kyle, he did all those exposés. 447 00:54:32,646 --> 00:54:34,214 He broke up with me. 448 00:54:36,182 --> 00:54:38,652 Adam Ellis! My office! 449 00:54:39,687 --> 00:54:40,721 Now! 450 00:54:41,388 --> 00:54:42,590 Fuck. 451 00:54:44,558 --> 00:54:45,493 Wish me luck. 452 00:54:45,626 --> 00:54:46,660 Wh-- 453 00:54:52,165 --> 00:54:54,268 This is crazy, Adam. 454 00:54:54,401 --> 00:54:55,569 Um... 455 00:54:55,703 --> 00:54:57,705 Yeah. No, that's-- Yeah, no, it's all-- 456 00:54:57,838 --> 00:54:59,807 It's true, it's all happening. I got the LA office calling 457 00:54:59,940 --> 00:55:03,244 and asking what's happening and I don't know what to tell them. 458 00:55:03,377 --> 00:55:04,845 Which they don't like, of course. 459 00:55:04,979 --> 00:55:08,516 And I don't like it, so tell me. How does this end? 460 00:55:10,284 --> 00:55:11,585 I don't-- I don't know. 461 00:55:11,719 --> 00:55:13,254 The reason I'm asking... Yeah, no-- 462 00:55:13,387 --> 00:55:15,121 ...because you're being weirdly coy, 463 00:55:15,256 --> 00:55:18,225 um, is because I'm thinking about taking this thing much bigger. 464 00:55:18,359 --> 00:55:20,261 I mean, not that it's not right now, but-- 465 00:55:20,394 --> 00:55:24,097 I'm thinking we take it multimedia, not just one quadrant. 466 00:55:24,231 --> 00:55:26,333 I think we go four quadrants on this thing, you know? 467 00:55:26,467 --> 00:55:28,269 And we take it to the mat. 468 00:55:28,402 --> 00:55:30,738 We could really make this, like, a thing. You know? 469 00:55:30,871 --> 00:55:33,841 This could be-- I mean, I'm not diminishing-- It already is big. 470 00:55:33,974 --> 00:55:37,244 But I'm talking, like-- I mean, like, worldwide. 471 00:55:44,985 --> 00:55:46,320 What's going on? 472 00:55:47,120 --> 00:55:48,556 Is everything okay? 473 00:55:49,657 --> 00:55:50,691 What happened? 474 00:55:51,559 --> 00:55:53,192 Pics or it didn't happen. 475 00:55:57,130 --> 00:55:58,499 Ellis, wh-- 476 00:56:14,180 --> 00:56:16,350 Come on, pick up. 477 00:56:16,450 --> 00:56:18,184 I said I needed space. 478 00:56:18,319 --> 00:56:22,088 I know, I'm sorry. I just need help, Kyle. 479 00:56:24,157 --> 00:56:25,793 Yeah, I'm aware. 480 00:56:30,764 --> 00:56:33,132 This is me trying to say something... 481 00:56:33,968 --> 00:56:35,201 real. 482 00:56:36,937 --> 00:56:38,439 Is this you hearing me? 483 00:56:40,441 --> 00:56:42,443 What do you need? 484 00:56:42,576 --> 00:56:45,279 I really need to find out what's behind this anonymous user handle. 485 00:56:45,379 --> 00:56:47,581 That's not what I meant, Adam. 486 00:56:47,681 --> 00:56:50,417 And it's not an easy ask, all sorts of privacy issues. 487 00:56:50,551 --> 00:56:51,719 Please? 488 00:56:51,852 --> 00:56:53,887 Whatever it is is trying to kill me. 489 00:56:54,021 --> 00:56:55,522 The ghost? 490 00:56:56,323 --> 00:56:58,726 Adam, I'm worried about you. 491 00:56:58,859 --> 00:57:00,828 Maybe you should talk to someone. 492 00:57:02,096 --> 00:57:03,697 I'm talking to you. 493 00:57:06,800 --> 00:57:07,768 Please, Kyle. 494 00:57:10,104 --> 00:57:11,538 Text me the handle. 495 00:57:13,240 --> 00:57:14,508 Thanks. 496 00:57:26,987 --> 00:57:30,189 You said that the spirit harmed you, like, physically? 497 00:57:30,324 --> 00:57:32,626 Yeah, um, look at, uh-- 498 00:57:35,929 --> 00:57:37,931 Yeah, it hurt, and, um... 499 00:57:38,499 --> 00:57:40,000 it gave me a nosebleed. 500 00:57:40,134 --> 00:57:44,271 There's a strange energy coming from this corner here. 501 00:57:44,405 --> 00:57:45,773 It's really unusual. 502 00:57:45,906 --> 00:57:47,374 Yeah, so that's where I first saw him. 503 00:57:47,508 --> 00:57:50,010 I was getting sleep paralysis, 504 00:57:50,144 --> 00:57:52,546 and I wake up and I see him, 505 00:57:52,680 --> 00:57:55,549 but I see him in real life now as well. 506 00:57:55,683 --> 00:57:59,887 Starting in your dreams doesn't mean that's actually where it started, yeah? 507 00:58:00,020 --> 00:58:01,055 Okay. 508 00:58:01,187 --> 00:58:03,090 -This area... -Right? 509 00:58:03,223 --> 00:58:06,126 ...harbors an awful lot of negativity. 510 00:58:06,260 --> 00:58:08,662 Yes. Yeah, it's the Internet. 511 00:58:11,765 --> 00:58:16,737 Some... ghosts, if that's the word you choose to use... 512 00:58:16,870 --> 00:58:17,905 Right. 513 00:58:18,038 --> 00:58:20,841 ...can tap into your thoughts. 514 00:58:21,742 --> 00:58:25,279 Did you do something to invite it into your life? 515 00:58:29,483 --> 00:58:31,385 This number keeps calling me. 516 00:58:31,518 --> 00:58:34,154 I thought it was a prank at first too, but it's-- I don't think it is. 517 00:58:34,288 --> 00:58:35,756 And I think it's-- I think it's connected 518 00:58:35,889 --> 00:58:38,125 because whenever I pick it up-- 519 00:58:38,258 --> 00:58:39,760 I'm not-- I'm not crazy. 520 00:58:39,893 --> 00:58:42,196 I know how this sounds. I'm not. 521 00:58:42,329 --> 00:58:45,866 Is that the primary device you use to document your experiences? 522 00:58:45,999 --> 00:58:46,934 Um... 523 00:58:47,067 --> 00:58:48,302 yeah. 524 00:58:49,036 --> 00:58:50,471 Is that bad? 525 00:58:50,604 --> 00:58:53,574 I don't know, if I'm being perfectly honest. 526 00:58:53,707 --> 00:58:56,477 What I do know is that whatever it is, 527 00:58:56,610 --> 00:58:58,512 is not connected to this space, 528 00:58:58,645 --> 00:59:00,748 it's connected to you. 529 00:59:00,881 --> 00:59:02,216 To me? 530 00:59:03,016 --> 00:59:05,219 So what does that mean? What do I do? 531 00:59:05,352 --> 00:59:07,921 You gotta figure out who and what it really is and what it really wants. 532 00:59:08,055 --> 00:59:09,790 It's a child ghost called David, 533 00:59:09,923 --> 00:59:12,526 and I'm pretty sure it wants to kill me. I told you that. 534 00:59:12,659 --> 00:59:14,561 Yes, that's what he told you 535 00:59:14,695 --> 00:59:16,930 in your paralysis-induced dreams. 536 00:59:17,064 --> 00:59:18,632 Exactly. 537 00:59:18,766 --> 00:59:21,001 Spirits don't always appear as they actually are. 538 00:59:21,135 --> 00:59:23,003 They're gonna show you what they want you to see 539 00:59:23,137 --> 00:59:25,372 and they are gonna tell you what they want you to hear, 540 00:59:25,506 --> 00:59:28,442 and the truth is often far more complicated. 541 01:00:36,210 --> 01:00:38,011 Thanks for joining me, Mr. Ellis. 542 01:00:38,145 --> 01:00:40,981 I know the note thing is a bit odd and a bit old-fashioned, 543 01:00:41,114 --> 01:00:42,783 but I have my own reasons. 544 01:00:42,916 --> 01:00:46,486 My name is Phyllis Crainey. I'm an Internet sleuth. 545 01:00:47,322 --> 01:00:48,522 Okay. 546 01:00:48,655 --> 01:00:50,357 I have a keen interest in the paranormal. 547 01:00:50,490 --> 01:00:54,295 Sorry, does that mean you investigate Internet ghosts? 548 01:00:54,428 --> 01:00:56,264 It's not as uncommon as you think. 549 01:00:56,396 --> 01:00:57,898 - I keep-- - Here you go. 550 01:00:59,867 --> 01:01:02,870 I keep having these nightmares. 551 01:01:03,003 --> 01:01:06,473 There's a boy with a-- with a caved in head. 552 01:01:06,607 --> 01:01:08,243 And there's a woman, 553 01:01:08,375 --> 01:01:10,811 she has, like, long straggly hair, it's like-- 554 01:01:10,944 --> 01:01:11,979 Loopy Linda. 555 01:01:13,248 --> 01:01:15,415 Loopy Linda? Linda Johnson. 556 01:01:15,549 --> 01:01:18,685 I always assumed she was mentally ill. 557 01:01:18,819 --> 01:01:21,322 That was until I read your articles. 558 01:01:21,455 --> 01:01:24,458 Linda is what you would call "Internet famous," 559 01:01:24,591 --> 01:01:26,727 especially on the Deep Web. 560 01:01:26,860 --> 01:01:29,062 It started off with these message board users 561 01:01:29,196 --> 01:01:32,699 sharing interviews of a psychiatric patient called Linda 562 01:01:32,833 --> 01:01:35,903 saying and doing all kinds of crazy stuff. 563 01:01:36,036 --> 01:01:37,638 Like-- Like what? 564 01:01:37,771 --> 01:01:41,708 She'd be drawing a boy with a crushed head, 565 01:01:41,842 --> 01:01:43,644 saying things like, "I fought the devil." 566 01:01:44,279 --> 01:01:45,779 "Don't ask three." 567 01:01:45,913 --> 01:01:48,782 A tape of her suicide even made it on there. 568 01:01:48,916 --> 01:01:51,618 Suicide? Why would anyone post that? 569 01:01:51,752 --> 01:01:55,088 It's the Internet. It's anonymous, and that... 570 01:01:55,889 --> 01:01:58,158 can bring out the worst in some people. 571 01:01:59,660 --> 01:02:01,929 How many questions have you asked him? 572 01:02:03,364 --> 01:02:04,965 Two. 573 01:02:05,098 --> 01:02:07,901 The three questions are a basic incantation. 574 01:02:08,802 --> 01:02:11,505 You've invited this "Dear David" into your life. 575 01:02:13,607 --> 01:02:14,942 What do I do? 576 01:02:15,075 --> 01:02:17,345 Search for "Loopy Linda." 577 01:02:17,444 --> 01:02:19,280 That's where you'll find your answers. 578 01:02:19,380 --> 01:02:21,048 Linda? 579 01:02:22,283 --> 01:02:23,917 It's Dr. Landers. 580 01:02:26,820 --> 01:02:28,956 Are you still having trouble sleeping? 581 01:02:30,123 --> 01:02:32,226 It comes in the darkness. 582 01:02:33,361 --> 01:02:39,066 It feeds on our fears, anxiety and suffering. 583 01:02:40,867 --> 01:02:42,536 I can hear it in my sleep. 584 01:02:43,338 --> 01:02:46,341 Linda. Linda. 585 01:02:46,441 --> 01:02:49,643 Your delusions are something that your mind has made up 586 01:02:49,743 --> 01:02:52,579 to help you cope with the trauma. 587 01:02:52,713 --> 01:02:56,717 You need to accept reality if you want to get better. 588 01:02:56,817 --> 01:02:58,151 You murdered your husband. 589 01:02:58,252 --> 01:03:00,053 No, I didn't. I didn't. 590 01:03:00,187 --> 01:03:02,656 And you inflicted severe head trauma upon your son. 591 01:03:02,789 --> 01:03:04,325 He's not my son. 592 01:03:04,425 --> 01:03:07,462 He is your son, and you put him in a coma 593 01:03:07,594 --> 01:03:09,830 from which he might never wake up. 594 01:03:09,963 --> 01:03:12,766 Good. Don't let it ever wake up, 595 01:03:12,866 --> 01:03:14,235 because it's coming for me. 596 01:03:14,369 --> 01:03:15,669 I know it's coming for me. 597 01:03:15,802 --> 01:03:17,804 But I am not gonna let it, because you know why? 598 01:03:17,938 --> 01:03:21,675 I fought the devil. I fought the fucking devil. 599 01:03:21,775 --> 01:03:23,710 I fought the dev-- 600 01:03:25,712 --> 01:03:28,416 Go back. Go back, go back. 601 01:03:28,548 --> 01:03:30,284 He's not my son. 602 01:03:30,418 --> 01:03:33,120 He is your son, and you put him in a coma 603 01:03:33,221 --> 01:03:35,722 from which he might never wake up. 604 01:03:36,523 --> 01:03:37,924 ...put him in a coma 605 01:03:38,058 --> 01:03:40,193 from which he might never wake up. 606 01:03:41,828 --> 01:03:46,566 David Johnson coma. 607 01:03:46,700 --> 01:03:49,303 Coma, coma, coma. David Johnson. Davi-- 608 01:03:49,437 --> 01:03:51,171 Oh, my God. No way. 609 01:03:52,240 --> 01:03:56,710 "David Johnson has awoken after 21 long years in a coma. 610 01:03:57,611 --> 01:04:02,115 Doctors at NewYork-Presbyterian Hospital say 611 01:04:02,250 --> 01:04:04,519 he is still yet to speak, but is recovering well, 612 01:04:04,651 --> 01:04:07,988 and was only ten when his mother went inexplicably insane, 613 01:04:08,121 --> 01:04:10,291 killing her husband before... 614 01:04:12,059 --> 01:04:14,828 going on to crush David's skull... 615 01:04:15,862 --> 01:04:17,864 with a computer monitor." 616 01:04:29,377 --> 01:04:30,610 Sir? 617 01:04:31,845 --> 01:04:33,548 Sir, can I help you with something? 618 01:04:33,680 --> 01:04:35,715 Oh, yeah, um... 619 01:04:38,286 --> 01:04:41,556 I'm looking for a patient, David Johnson. 620 01:04:41,688 --> 01:04:43,623 He was admitted in 1996. 621 01:04:43,757 --> 01:04:45,759 Severe head trauma. 622 01:04:47,495 --> 01:04:50,364 That's weird, there's not much here. 623 01:04:50,498 --> 01:04:53,234 There might be some hard copy files out back, 624 01:04:53,367 --> 01:04:57,438 but unless you're family, I can't give you his medical records. 625 01:04:57,572 --> 01:04:59,039 His family are all dead. 626 01:04:59,172 --> 01:05:02,243 My condolences, but I still can't release these. 627 01:05:02,376 --> 01:05:03,610 They're too fresh. 628 01:05:04,744 --> 01:05:06,347 Too fresh? What does that mean? 629 01:05:06,481 --> 01:05:08,382 Well, he died a few days ago. 630 01:05:15,389 --> 01:05:18,825 Sir, what is your relationship to the deceased? 631 01:05:25,699 --> 01:05:27,033 I'm... 632 01:05:28,902 --> 01:05:32,540 being haunted by the ghost of his child self. 633 01:05:32,672 --> 01:05:36,776 Okay, so the department you really need to go see is psychiatric, 634 01:05:36,910 --> 01:05:39,580 and you need to go to another location for those services, 635 01:05:39,713 --> 01:05:42,849 so let me find someone that can help you with that. 636 01:05:51,858 --> 01:05:53,494 Security to reception. 637 01:05:54,895 --> 01:05:56,430 Security to reception. 638 01:06:01,235 --> 01:06:02,270 Okay. 639 01:06:03,203 --> 01:06:05,273 Records, records, records. 640 01:06:06,072 --> 01:06:08,775 Johnson. Year, '96. 641 01:06:11,445 --> 01:06:12,946 David Johnson. 642 01:06:19,587 --> 01:06:21,788 Security to reception. 643 01:06:23,558 --> 01:06:25,259 Dr. Landers. 644 01:06:29,597 --> 01:06:33,467 Okay, Dr. Landers, let's hope you have some answers for me. 645 01:06:51,252 --> 01:06:53,321 Dr. Landers? 646 01:07:00,628 --> 01:07:01,995 Dr. Landers? 647 01:07:18,379 --> 01:07:20,013 What? 648 01:07:25,419 --> 01:07:28,121 Oh, my God. What the fuck? 649 01:07:53,481 --> 01:07:55,048 Dr. Landers? 650 01:08:10,096 --> 01:08:11,131 Oh. 651 01:08:22,443 --> 01:08:23,577 Get out! 652 01:08:34,555 --> 01:08:36,324 9-1-1, what's your emergency? 653 01:08:36,457 --> 01:08:38,326 I need to report a dead body. 654 01:08:50,738 --> 01:08:53,607 Hey, what happened to you and your sisters, anyway? 655 01:08:54,207 --> 01:08:55,609 You were all so close... 656 01:08:55,743 --> 01:08:59,447 All right, you little shit. Let's dance. 657 01:08:59,547 --> 01:09:01,315 I keep hoping you'll change your mind. 658 01:09:01,415 --> 01:09:03,950 Can we please just talk about something else? 659 01:09:04,084 --> 01:09:06,152 I just want you to know I'm here for you. 660 01:09:12,493 --> 01:09:14,961 - Andy, please help me. - I've tried to help you. 661 01:09:16,162 --> 01:09:18,299 You didn't want my help, remember? 662 01:09:18,399 --> 01:09:20,735 Do you know how many times I tried to get you to tell me the truth? 663 01:09:20,835 --> 01:09:22,603 I practically begged you. 664 01:09:25,306 --> 01:09:26,407 But no. 665 01:09:27,173 --> 01:09:29,209 You decided to protect your girlfriends. 666 01:09:30,043 --> 01:09:32,045 I loved you so much. 667 01:09:51,898 --> 01:09:54,668 Fuck you. 668 01:10:18,526 --> 01:10:21,027 Hey, Aurora. 669 01:10:22,430 --> 01:10:24,931 Call Evelyn. 670 01:10:25,064 --> 01:10:27,334 Sorry, can you repeat that? 671 01:10:27,468 --> 01:10:31,938 Call... Evelyn. 672 01:10:33,641 --> 01:10:36,477 I'm sorry, can you repeat that? 673 01:10:39,547 --> 01:10:42,215 Call-- Call Kyle. 674 01:10:43,016 --> 01:10:44,785 Calling Kyle. 675 01:10:51,826 --> 01:10:54,027 Hi, it's Kyle. I'd love to talk, 676 01:10:54,160 --> 01:10:55,529 but I can't right now. 677 01:10:55,663 --> 01:10:57,465 Please leave a message after the tone 678 01:10:57,598 --> 01:11:00,033 and I'll get back to you soon. Take care-- 679 01:11:10,076 --> 01:11:11,579 Oh, my God. 680 01:11:28,596 --> 01:11:29,996 Hey. 681 01:11:32,198 --> 01:11:34,468 Can I talk to you about something? 682 01:11:34,602 --> 01:11:35,769 Are you kidding? 683 01:11:37,103 --> 01:11:38,873 Are you mad at me? 684 01:11:39,005 --> 01:11:40,808 Does it matter? 685 01:11:40,941 --> 01:11:43,310 You're Internet famous and I'm just a wannabe, right? 686 01:11:43,444 --> 01:11:46,179 I can pick up your slack at work but you can't pick up your phone when I text. 687 01:11:46,313 --> 01:11:49,148 You're not the only one who hates being ignored. 688 01:11:51,385 --> 01:11:53,654 I don't know what you're talking about. 689 01:11:54,755 --> 01:11:56,055 I really don't. 690 01:11:56,189 --> 01:11:57,725 Those DMs last night? 691 01:11:58,626 --> 01:12:00,327 Eat shit. 692 01:12:05,966 --> 01:12:07,501 What? 693 01:12:07,635 --> 01:12:09,770 I didn't write these. I didn't write these. 694 01:12:20,046 --> 01:12:22,349 Hey. 695 01:12:22,449 --> 01:12:24,552 So it turns out my contact didn't have to break any privacy rules 696 01:12:24,685 --> 01:12:26,654 regarding the @(D)___David handle. 697 01:12:29,590 --> 01:12:30,624 Oh. 698 01:12:32,125 --> 01:12:34,495 That's good. Why? 699 01:12:34,962 --> 01:12:36,463 It doesn't exist. 700 01:12:40,000 --> 01:12:42,770 But it do-- I mean, I'm looking at it right now. 701 01:12:44,572 --> 01:12:45,706 Adam. 702 01:12:47,675 --> 01:12:49,243 Yeah, I'm here. 703 01:12:50,711 --> 01:12:53,212 I think it's time you let this go. 704 01:12:59,787 --> 01:13:01,822 Okay. Yeah. 705 01:13:05,259 --> 01:13:06,660 Well, thanks. Thanks. 706 01:13:07,494 --> 01:13:10,497 Hey, can you take a look at my newest list? 707 01:13:10,631 --> 01:13:12,066 I want to make sure it's relatable, 708 01:13:12,198 --> 01:13:13,834 and you're super good at that. 709 01:13:16,303 --> 01:13:17,871 Yeah, sure. 710 01:13:18,706 --> 01:13:20,841 Yeah, let's do it! Yeah. Thanks. Yeah. 711 01:13:22,343 --> 01:13:24,177 Should be in your inbox. 712 01:13:42,062 --> 01:13:43,731 Why, Norris? 713 01:13:44,531 --> 01:13:45,299 Uh... 714 01:13:45,432 --> 01:13:46,867 Do you not want to do it? 715 01:13:47,001 --> 01:13:48,535 Do I want to-- No, I don't want to do it. 716 01:13:48,669 --> 01:13:50,437 Why would you even send me that? 717 01:13:50,571 --> 01:13:52,306 I-- I just thought you could do it as a favor. 718 01:13:52,439 --> 01:13:55,275 As a fa-- Are you a fucking psycho? Is that the problem? 719 01:13:55,409 --> 01:13:57,244 What? No. Are you fucking sick? 720 01:13:57,378 --> 01:13:59,246 Adam, I'm sorry. What are you talk-- What's going on? 721 01:13:59,380 --> 01:14:01,248 What are you talking about? 722 01:14:02,883 --> 01:14:05,319 Norris just sent me the most fucked up thing I've ever seen. 723 01:14:05,452 --> 01:14:07,388 No, I-- I didn't. 724 01:14:07,521 --> 01:14:09,923 Oh, my God. Are you all in on this? 725 01:14:10,057 --> 01:14:11,625 Adam, what are you talking about? 726 01:14:11,759 --> 01:14:13,794 Is this some fucking joke? You think this is funny? 727 01:14:13,927 --> 01:14:16,130 Yeah, everybody watch the fucking show. Real funny, huh? 728 01:14:16,263 --> 01:14:20,367 Yeah, really funny. It's on every fucking screen. Are you fucking kidding me? 729 01:14:20,501 --> 01:14:22,336 - Hey! Whoa! - You guys are so fucking... 730 01:14:22,469 --> 01:14:24,338 -Hey! -...fucked up! 731 01:14:24,471 --> 01:14:27,141 Yeah, film this. Fucking film this. Is that good content for you? 732 01:14:27,274 --> 01:14:29,743 Hey! Hey! What's going on? 733 01:14:29,877 --> 01:14:32,211 Look what the fuck they just sent me, Bryce! 734 01:14:32,346 --> 01:14:34,982 Huh? That is so fucked up. Look. 735 01:14:35,749 --> 01:14:37,484 Did it-- No, it didn't say that. 736 01:14:37,618 --> 01:14:39,053 - Okay. Hey. - They changed it! 737 01:14:39,185 --> 01:14:40,154 -They changed it. -It's okay. 738 01:14:40,287 --> 01:14:42,022 Come here. Come sit down. 739 01:14:42,156 --> 01:14:43,791 Sit down. Sit down. 740 01:14:43,924 --> 01:14:45,626 -It's all right, everyone. -It didn't say that. 741 01:14:45,759 --> 01:14:47,828 Go back to work. Stop filming. But good instincts. 742 01:14:47,961 --> 01:14:49,697 What the-- It didn't say that. Okay, hey. Hey. 743 01:14:49,830 --> 01:14:52,232 It didn't say that. Hey, listen, listen, listen. 744 01:14:52,366 --> 01:14:54,568 Why don't you take some time off? Yeah? 745 01:14:54,702 --> 01:14:56,970 Get your head right, all right? 746 01:14:57,104 --> 01:14:59,807 I'm very passionate about mental health. It's very important to me. 747 01:14:59,940 --> 01:15:02,509 So go home-- Take all the time you need, in fact. 748 01:15:02,643 --> 01:15:05,079 And if it's the end of the thread that's stressing you out, 749 01:15:05,211 --> 01:15:06,814 just know that we can absorb it. 750 01:15:06,947 --> 01:15:09,183 We can workshop it in-house, it's what we do. 751 01:15:09,316 --> 01:15:12,119 We're a family here at BuzzFeed, all right? We look out for each other. 752 01:15:12,252 --> 01:15:13,554 But you need-- 753 01:15:13,687 --> 01:15:15,589 You need to take it easy. 754 01:15:16,390 --> 01:15:17,624 You look like shit. 755 01:15:18,525 --> 01:15:20,694 All right, everyone, it's okay. 756 01:15:21,228 --> 01:15:22,229 That was fun. 757 01:15:23,197 --> 01:15:26,433 Right, it's okay, Norris. Why don't you take a break? 758 01:15:27,034 --> 01:15:28,335 All right. 759 01:16:00,334 --> 01:16:01,702 Hey, babies. 760 01:16:02,903 --> 01:16:03,904 Come here. 761 01:16:15,082 --> 01:16:16,316 What now? 762 01:16:19,186 --> 01:16:21,321 You're a judgmental asshole, Kyle, 763 01:16:21,455 --> 01:16:23,056 and I'm fucking sick of it. 764 01:16:23,657 --> 01:16:25,159 Go fuck yourself, Kyle. 765 01:16:25,893 --> 01:16:28,762 I didn't send these. Damn it. 766 01:17:02,329 --> 01:17:04,598 Fuck you! 767 01:17:13,674 --> 01:17:15,442 I'm in control now. 768 01:17:18,078 --> 01:17:19,379 I'm in control. 769 01:17:33,961 --> 01:17:34,962 Fuck off. 770 01:17:35,095 --> 01:17:37,030 I'm in control, I'm in control. 771 01:17:38,765 --> 01:17:39,800 Stop. 772 01:17:41,401 --> 01:17:42,803 Stop! 773 01:17:43,871 --> 01:17:44,638 What? 774 01:17:44,771 --> 01:17:46,540 I'm in control, David. 775 01:17:48,375 --> 01:17:49,576 Oh, no. 776 01:17:50,110 --> 01:17:52,779 No. Stop. David, stop. 777 01:18:02,556 --> 01:18:03,790 No, I just saved. 778 01:18:05,826 --> 01:18:07,828 David, what the fuck did you do? 779 01:18:09,863 --> 01:18:11,698 That was three questions. 780 01:18:11,832 --> 01:18:15,336 Oh, shit. That was a question. No, it was-- 781 01:18:37,358 --> 01:18:38,725 What the fuck? 782 01:18:50,271 --> 01:18:52,506 I'm in control. 783 01:18:58,679 --> 01:19:00,814 No. No. 784 01:19:00,948 --> 01:19:03,083 What's going on? No. No, no, no. 785 01:19:03,984 --> 01:19:04,952 Oh, no. 786 01:19:12,626 --> 01:19:14,329 What is happening? 787 01:19:14,461 --> 01:19:16,663 No. Help! 788 01:19:17,265 --> 01:19:19,866 Help me! No! 789 01:19:23,338 --> 01:19:25,038 Help me! 790 01:19:38,085 --> 01:19:41,655 No, no! No! Stop! 791 01:19:51,765 --> 01:19:54,668 Please help me! 792 01:19:56,471 --> 01:19:57,871 No! 793 01:20:04,511 --> 01:20:06,113 Die in a fire! 794 01:20:06,646 --> 01:20:09,283 No! 795 01:20:14,322 --> 01:20:15,555 Adam. 796 01:20:27,667 --> 01:20:29,102 I'm in control. 797 01:20:42,783 --> 01:20:45,919 I'm in control. 798 01:20:49,623 --> 01:20:51,625 You were an artist too? 799 01:20:59,099 --> 01:21:01,402 You never ask about my day. 800 01:21:01,536 --> 01:21:04,004 - You never call me back. - People don't like you. 801 01:21:04,137 --> 01:21:05,739 All I wanted was to be your friend. 802 01:21:05,872 --> 01:21:08,175 Your cartoons, they're empty. Like you. 803 01:21:08,309 --> 01:21:10,244 You never say anything that's real. 804 01:21:10,378 --> 01:21:13,080 I have a new list. "Top Ten Reasons Adam Ellis is a Dick." 805 01:21:13,213 --> 01:21:14,781 You're only here to tick some boxes. 806 01:21:14,915 --> 01:21:16,250 You're selfish. 807 01:21:16,384 --> 01:21:18,286 - Self-obsessed. - You're a fucking-- 808 01:21:18,419 --> 01:21:19,719 Asshole! 809 01:21:19,853 --> 01:21:22,122 -And you never say I love you. -But I-- 810 01:21:23,123 --> 01:21:25,192 Why are you saying this shit to me? 811 01:21:39,574 --> 01:21:41,074 You know this, Adam. 812 01:21:43,143 --> 01:21:45,879 Deep down, you know you're worthless. 813 01:21:46,447 --> 01:21:48,715 Accept it, you're alone. 814 01:21:50,083 --> 01:21:52,152 You'll never be enough. 815 01:21:52,786 --> 01:21:54,322 So give up. 816 01:22:15,576 --> 01:22:18,312 He hasn't been answering his phone. Have you talked to him at all? 817 01:22:18,446 --> 01:22:20,113 Holy shit! Adam! 818 01:22:24,885 --> 01:22:26,320 - Adam! - Open up! 819 01:22:26,454 --> 01:22:28,722 - Are you in there? Ellis! - Can you hear me? 820 01:22:28,855 --> 01:22:30,424 - What the fuck-- - Adam! 821 01:22:31,392 --> 01:22:33,361 What is this place? This is a nightmare. 822 01:22:47,107 --> 01:22:48,409 I'm gonna call 9-1-1. 823 01:22:50,344 --> 01:22:52,179 - Watch out, watch out! - Ellis! 824 01:22:54,181 --> 01:22:55,916 - Ellis, we're outside. - Can you hear me? 825 01:22:56,049 --> 01:22:57,984 - I'm not alone. - Hold on a second. 826 01:22:58,718 --> 01:22:59,953 Hello? Adam! 827 01:23:00,086 --> 01:23:01,721 I'm lonely sometimes, 828 01:23:01,855 --> 01:23:03,291 but I'm not alone. 829 01:23:04,458 --> 01:23:06,059 And I am enough. 830 01:23:08,496 --> 01:23:09,430 I am enough. 831 01:23:11,599 --> 01:23:12,466 I am enough. 832 01:23:14,801 --> 01:23:16,470 And I'm waking the fuck up. 833 01:23:22,476 --> 01:23:23,477 Adam! 834 01:23:25,912 --> 01:23:27,080 Adam! 835 01:23:27,214 --> 01:23:28,249 Ellis! 836 01:23:28,683 --> 01:23:29,650 Ellis! 837 01:23:29,783 --> 01:23:31,785 Adam, are you in there? 838 01:23:37,824 --> 01:23:39,726 We're trying to help. 839 01:23:39,859 --> 01:23:41,229 Ellis! 840 01:23:49,035 --> 01:23:51,071 Ellis! 841 01:24:17,331 --> 01:24:20,234 Die! Die! 842 01:24:29,477 --> 01:24:30,844 Ellis! 843 01:24:32,747 --> 01:24:34,248 Adam! 844 01:24:38,051 --> 01:24:39,919 Here! Come here! I've got you. 845 01:24:40,053 --> 01:24:42,223 Come on! 846 01:25:24,197 --> 01:25:26,166 Stick up on the alpha side. 847 01:25:30,837 --> 01:25:35,075 It's gonna be okay. It's gonna be okay. 848 01:25:38,512 --> 01:25:39,547 I love you. 849 01:25:57,531 --> 01:25:58,632 Holy shit. 850 01:26:02,936 --> 01:26:04,638 -Hey, babies. Come here, come here. -Look who's here. 851 01:26:05,706 --> 01:26:09,008 Come here. You made it. Come here. Come here, I got you. 852 01:26:09,543 --> 01:26:11,312 I got you. Come here. 853 01:26:11,978 --> 01:26:14,415 Hey. Here we go. 854 01:26:20,721 --> 01:26:22,922 Oh. You found them. 855 01:26:29,129 --> 01:26:31,965 I'm so sorry, Ellis. 856 01:26:33,701 --> 01:26:35,436 For not believing you. 857 01:26:35,569 --> 01:26:38,372 Yeah, you told us something was wrong, we should have listened. 858 01:26:38,506 --> 01:26:39,540 Yeah. 859 01:26:40,307 --> 01:26:43,009 I pushed you guys away, it wasn't you. 860 01:26:45,579 --> 01:26:47,147 But I'm here now. 861 01:26:48,582 --> 01:26:50,083 I'm actually present. 862 01:26:54,588 --> 01:26:55,955 I just... 863 01:26:57,558 --> 01:27:00,394 need to work on letting you guys in more. 864 01:27:05,699 --> 01:27:07,033 And I will. 865 01:27:09,336 --> 01:27:10,438 I promise. 866 01:27:28,656 --> 01:27:30,624 And Adam Ellis's last tweet was, 867 01:27:30,758 --> 01:27:34,595 "For everyone asking if I'm alive, I'm doing okay." 868 01:27:34,728 --> 01:27:36,095 Peace sign emoji. 869 01:27:37,130 --> 01:27:38,466 I don't know about you, 870 01:27:38,599 --> 01:27:41,769 but I'm calling bullshit on this whole thing. 871 01:27:41,902 --> 01:27:43,871 Now you tell me what's up. 872 01:27:50,076 --> 01:27:52,212 I see you, BeardedBoy233. 873 01:27:52,346 --> 01:27:53,980 Thank you for the sub. 874 01:27:57,116 --> 01:28:01,087 Ellis is a douchebag if he thinks that we're gonna play nice on the Internet 875 01:28:01,222 --> 01:28:03,324 'cause of his little ghost story. 876 01:28:10,764 --> 01:28:12,098 Screw you, bitch. 877 01:28:12,233 --> 01:28:13,534 Don't come onto my stream 878 01:28:13,667 --> 01:28:16,102 and try to silence my free speech. 879 01:28:16,804 --> 01:28:18,239 Thank you. 880 01:28:20,206 --> 01:28:22,175 Come on, which one of you cucks 881 01:28:22,309 --> 01:28:25,211 made a dumbass Dear David account? 882 01:28:29,416 --> 01:28:30,918 Okay, I'll play along. 883 01:28:32,085 --> 01:28:36,624 - Dear David, why are you so fugly? 884 01:28:41,060 --> 01:28:42,463 All righty. 885 01:28:42,596 --> 01:28:44,431 Dear David... 886 01:28:44,565 --> 01:28:48,034 ...is it because your parents tried to cancel you? 887 01:28:49,703 --> 01:28:51,104 I feel so bad. 888 01:28:53,574 --> 01:28:57,444 Dear David, for real? 889 01:29:05,419 --> 01:29:06,453 See? 890 01:29:08,087 --> 01:29:09,523 This is so dumb. 891 01:29:10,189 --> 01:29:13,260 Way to go, guys. Frickin' brill-- 59520

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.