Original subtitles

[Theme music, "the love boat"] Love, exciting and new.

Come aboard, we're expecting you.

And love, life's sweetest reward, let it flow,

it floats back to you.

The love boat, soon we'll be making another run.

The love boat, promises something for everyone.

Set a course for adventure, your mind on a new romance.

And love, won't hurt anymore.

It's an open smile, on a friendly shore.

It's love, welcome aboard, it's love.

Well, Mr. Boggs, let's see, you're on the fiesta deck,

cabin 419.

I hope you enjoy your trip.

Oh, that sounds a little like reminding

a dog to enjoy its bone.

Well, don't Bury it in the cabin.

Mr. Boggs--

oh, there you are, Stevens.

I was down in my cabin putting together some notes

for our presentation.

Oh, well listen, don't work too hard.

Boggs and company wants you alert and sharp

when we get to Mexico.

Box boggs, please, I need to speak

to you again about my wife.

It would mean a great deal to me if I could bring her along.

Stevens, I said no wives.

But we've only been married two weeks, Mr. Boggs.

Look, if you say yes, I can call her.

She can be here in 10 minutes.

I know when you meet her, you'll just love her.

I am sorry.

But we haven't even had a honeymoon, Mr. Boggs.

Look, Stevens, it's not like I don't understand your position,

but this is a business trip.

If I would allow you to bring your wife along,

my wife would kill me.

So just relax and enjoy yourself.

That's the first order of business.

I think I'll nose about the ship myself.

[Theme music, "the love boat"]

Matt: I told you to stay in the cabin.

Matt--

look, Marian, from now on, we can only meet in the cabin.

On deck, we have to be total strangers, you got it?

Total strangers.

Welcome to your honeymoon, Mrs. Stevens.

- Hi. - Hi.

I'm sawdust radell.

Oh, welcome aboard, sawdust.

Sawdust?

It's a nickname.

Oh, sawdust.

I would have guessed timber.

You wouldn't happen to know where

I could find me a list of the ship's officers, would you?

Sure, why don't you try the desk in the purser's lobby.

It's right down there.

You looking for anyone in particular?

You bet I am.

But I doubt if he's going to want me to find him.

I hope you like this cruise, Melissa.

Daddy, I'll like it.

We could have gone to the mountains.

Did you really want to go to the mountains?

No, no, I really wanted to go on a cruise,

as long as you wanted to.

I want to, but I want to, too.

I want to.

Ok.

I'm glad that's settled.

You know what, I think we're off to a great start.

Eliot weatherly.

My daughter, Melissa.

Captain stubing and my daughter, Vicki.

Hi.

Hi.

I see you're on the fiesta deck, cabin 135,

and you're in 137, Mr. Weatherly.

Hey, dad, can I show Melissa around she ship?

Sounds like a good idea to me.

You want to?

I'd love it.

Well, come on, let's go before the captain

finds something for me to do and changes my father's mind.

Thanks.

Come on.

You seem to get along very well with your daughter.

Yes, Terry, thank you.

Yes, Vicki and I are quite close.

I'm new at being a single parent.

Melissa's mother died three months ago.

Oh, I'm sorry.

I know how it feels to lose someone very dear to you.

Well, actually, we'd been divorced for 10 years.

I moved to New York and Melissa stayed with her mother in la.

Melissa and I haven't had the chance

to get to know each other.

A cruise is a good way to change that.

You'll see.

I wish I had your confidence.

I wish I had anybody's confidence.

Hi.

I'm Bonnie Lee Boone.

I'm gopher Smith, i'm the purser on this--

first things first, Bonnie Lee, congratulations.

As our one millionth passenger, you have just won, guess what?

What?

A complete physical.

Would you two excuse me, please?

You wouldn't by any chance be the ship's doctor?

Dr. Bricker, heart specialist, if you know what I mean.

Yeah, he breaks them, I mend them.

Bonnie Lee, you're promenade 325,

and I'm available for dinner.

You two sure are cute.

We are going to have fun.

That's what they call me, doctor fun.

I'm the cutest, trust me.

Bye.

You hear?

Yeah.

Hi, Bonnie.

Hi, sawdust.

You think one of them could be him?

Either one could be.

I won't know until I do my research.

Well, whoever it is, I'm going to dismantle him bone by bone.

[Ship horn]

[Theme music, "the love boat"]

Isaac: Here you are.

Hey.

Hey, see that dude up there?

That's the guy I was telling you about.

He's the one that wanted a list of all the ship's officers.

I'm worried.

Oh, get out of here.

He's probably just selling something.

You see those shoulders?

Yeah.

Whatever he's selling, I'm not buying.

Think this will work?

Whoo-ee, sugar.

That's going to pull the rat right out of the hole.

Thanks.

You're really out to get this guy, aren't you?

You bet I am.

My fiance comes here on this cruise, one of these officers

uses his sleazy charms on her.

She comes back and breaks off our engagement.

I'm telling you, I'm going to work my charms on him.

Well, too bad she wouldn't give you his name.

That's because she knew what I'd do to him.

But she told me one thing.

That he's the world's greatest kisser.

And that's where I come in.

That's right, precious.

You're going to flush that Turkey out for me.

It isn't easy being your best friend, sawdust.

Come on, Bonnie, we've been friends

since we was in diapers.

Now if you had a bunch of girls you wanted me to kiss for you,

I'd kiss them for you.

Ok, where do we start?

Come here.

We're going to start with the high hog at the trough,

the captain down there.

All right, i'm game if he is, Whoo.

[Music playing]

- Hi. - Hi.

Hi.

Is there a tour of the ship?

The bus is just leaving, hop aboard.

Gee, thanks, but is their a captain's tour.

There is now.

Goodbye, Dr. Fun.

[Laughter]

[Music playing]

Matt, have you seen my suntan lotion?

Marian, you going up on deck?

No.

I thought I'd just sit under a 100-watt bulb.

Of course I'm going up on deck.

Matt, don't worry.

I will sit too close to you.

Marion--

Matt--

when you're on deck, I want you to think

of yourself as a single woman.

Well, I've never thought of myself as twins, Matt.

You know, most newlyweds stay in their cabin

for the whole cruise.

But usually together.

Yeah, ok, but that's the only difference.

Matt, I need air.

I'm a mammal.

You know, that's one of the first things

I noticed about you.

Marian, it's just that we have to be discreet.

Try not to be in the same place at the same time.

You mean like we are now?

Mm hmm.

Do you want to put on a, sweater the breeze is cool.

Daddy, the sun is hot.

Oh, you're right, it is.

Maybe you should put on a robe.

A robe?

You don't want to get a sunburn.

Do you burn?

I tan.

Elliot: Good, so do I. Something we have in common.

Hey, but what do we have in common in the winter?

I'm going to go for a swim.

Ok, but just be careful in the water.

Daddy, don't you remember?

In my high school, I was on the swimming team.

Right.

But at my high school, I was on the worrying team.

[Music playing]

Vicki: Hey, how's it going with your dad?

I don't know.

He's always worrying about everything.

We're always walking on eggs around each other.

I remember it was like that for me and my dad.

Really?

Vicki: Yeah.

I remember when I first came to live with him,

he bought me this great big Dollhouse

and I bought him a beautiful pipe.

But I was too old for the Dollhouse

and he couldn't stand smoking.

And we were too afraid to say anything to each other.

What happened?

Vicki: Well, we suffered for a couple of weeks.

And one day I stopped playing with the Dollhouse

and he stopped smoking the pipe.

And we just said we loved each other.

So saying you loved each other solved everything.

Vicki: No, but it was a start.

At least neither one of us had to smell

that terrible pipe anymore.

Come on.

Hey wait for me.

[Music playing]

Incredible.

I positively marvel at women.

I have to admit, you do display keen appreciation

of the feminine condition.

As they say in Moscow, I'm hot to trotsky.

Whoo, how much can a man take?

Look at that one.

Matt: That one?

Nah, there's nothing very special

about her, very ordinary.

Are you kidding?

Look at that body.

Matt: Does nothing for me.

Boggs: Stevens, you're crazy.

With that face.

Yeah, but it's such an obvious facelift.

She could probably sue for malpractice.

Mr. Boggs, did you see that?

What?

I could have sworn she winked at you.

That one?

Winked at me, are you sure?

Yes, certainly, absolutely.

I don't want to hurt her feelings.

No.

I'm sorry, what did you say?

Excuse me, but I'm a single woman,

and as such, I don't mingle with married men.

Buzz off, stranger.

Now the climax of our tour, ta-da, the captain's office.

It's cute.

Oh, I hate to say this, but the captain's

got to get back to work.

Oh, that's too bad.

You have really been so sweet.

I just have to give you something.

[Laughter]

That was something.

You're something too.

Just call me captain fun.

I'll see you later.

Count on it.

Bye.

[Music playing]

Sawdust: Hey, Bonnie, I just saw you coming

out of the captain's office.

What happened?

Oh, boy, he can box my compass any time.

Did he kiss you?

Did he?

There may be snow on the roof, but

there is a fire in the furnace.

Never mind all that stuff.

Is he the world's greatest kisser or not?

Well, I won't know until I do some more research.

[Theme music, "the love boat"]

Well, what do you think?

The steak looks good.

So does the lobster.

I was thinking maybe of the lamb chop.

Oh, you have whatever you like,

lamb chop, steak, lobster, shrimp curry.

We're here to enjoy ourselves.

Daddy, that's the point, we're here to enjoy ourselves.

Well aren't you having a good time?

I'd have a better time if you'd just relax a little.

Maybe you're right.

I love you anyway.

I don't know why, I don't think I've been

much of a father up till now.

Daddy, what counts is from now on.

You're right.

Once we get to know each other.

It can be terrific.

Yes, yes it can be.

Because I love you too.

[Music playing]

No, I'll wait from Mr. Boggs.

You get a match, sailor?

What are you doing?

Eating.

I intend on doing it the rest of my life.

Your table, your table wobbles.

I'll get you another table, across room.

Oh, no, pretend you don't know me.

Pretty soon I won't have to pretend.

Good evening, Stevens.

Mr. Boggs.

You're looking a little pale.

It's the sea.

Oh, I hope you're not working too hard?

Isn't that the one from before?

I'm sure she's waiting for someone.

Oh, are you?

The scuttlebutt aboard ship has

it that the most attractive woman in the room

is dining alone.

You look like an intelligent man.

You should know better than to listen to scuttlebutt.

You are right.

My name's Arthur boggs.

How do you do?

And if you're not expecting company,

I'd like it very much if you'd join me

and my young executive for dinner this evening.

Well, that's very kind of you.

No.

I don't think so, but thank you anyway.

Oh, come on now.

Don't let him bother you.

He's totally harmless.

Besides, we'll be rid of him in no time.

I've told you my name is Arthur.

Your name?

Marion.

Marion, this is Matt.

Matt-- Marion.

Beautiful, huh?

Now you see why we didn't bring the wives along.

[Laughter]

You sure are jolly tonight.

Well, just wait until the person

he's saving that seat for shows up.

Then we'll see some jolly, right sir?

Oh, is Bonnie coming?

Yeah, well, said she might, you know,

if she wasn't too busy.

She's busy.

Maybe it's not what it seems.

Maybe she's with doc because she's sick.

Yeah, that's a sick laugh.

[Music playing]

Surprised that the old man can still move?

I don't know how to explain it.

I never thought of you dancing.

And I never thought of you as being so grown up.

And speaking of surprises, I've got one for you.

You do?

What is it?

I'll tell you later.

Daddy--

later, later.

Right now, I'm dancing with a beautiful girl.

Marion, you have an allure that words cannot describe.

Thank you

you know, you look tired.

It's a funny thing, I often get very sleepy after a big meal.

Don't you?

Stevens, if you're sleepy, by all means, hit the hay.

Now, how about a drink, Marion?

What do you usually like?

A Moscow mule.

How did you know that, Stevens?

I just guessed.

Her red dress.

Goodnight.

I'll order us a little drinky.

You don't mind, do you?

Hey-- oh, sure, sure.

Hey, you're keeping me from my research.

I'm keeping you from getting arrested.

Now how come you got to dance so close to him?

And what's all this romancing?

Just kiss him and get it over with now, would you?

I can't do that.

You've got to get a man in a kissing mood.

Uh huh, first, you got to snuggle up, like this.

Now don't that make you feel romantic?

No, it don't.

Well, how about this?

I'm telling you, Bonnie, the vice

squad's going to arrest you.

[Music playing]

Marion, I think we have to take

stock of what we have here.

I don't know what you mean, Arthur.

I'm talking about two attractive consenting adults,

who instinctively understand each other's emotional needs.

Emotional needs.

I can see that you need a strong man who

will make your decisions for you,

and then tell you what you need, and then give it to you.

Are you all right?

I just thought I saw someone I knew.

But I guess I didn't.

Let's walk.

Why?

Goodnight, Melissa.

I really had a good time tonight.

Me too, daddy.

Maybe, well, maybe I can be a good father after all.

Better late than never.

Hmm?

You're doing fine.

Hey, what about the surprise?

You said you'd tell me later.

Oh, ok.

I found out about it just before we sailed.

You've been accepted at pinehurst.

Pinehurst?

Elliot: Oh, it's a great school, Melissa.

When you graduate, you'll be able to get into any college

in the country.

Where's pinehurst?

Connecticut.

Connecticut.

Daddy, I thought we'd be together now, living together.

Melissa, you know I travel a lot on business.

You'll be home for every holiday.

And I'll visit you in between.

I'll even arrange my trips so that I can make extra visits.

It'll work out fine, believe me.

Goodnight.

[Music playing]

You know, doc, I can read lips.

Really?

[Music playing]

Wow, yours were coming in loud and clear.

And you know they were saying?

Why don't we go to doc's cabin?

That's not what they were saying.

Please?

What they were saying was--

What they were saying was, why don't we go to Bonnie's cabin.

Oh, I see, you want the home court advantage.

Bonnie: Of course.

Doc: I have to warn you, I'm even better on the road.

I can't wait.

[Music playing]

[Laughter]

[Music playing]

Where have you been?

Where have I been?

You know perfectly well where I have been.

I've been on deck with your lecherous boss.

He's really a very nice man when

you get to know him better.

I don't plan to get to know him better.

How could you have done that to me?

I didn't do anything.

That's just it, Matt.

You watched another man paw your wife and you just stood there.

Marion, he's my boss.

The man who pays me.

You like the house?

You like the car?

Yes, Matt.

I like the house and I like the car,

it's you I have serious doubts about.

[Music playing]

Julie: Good morning, ladies and gentlemen.

That beautiful sight coming into view

is the village of puerto vallarta,

one of the most quaint and colorful areas

on the Mexican riviera.

[Music playing]

Captain stubing: You mean nothing happened?

Doc: She kissed me passionately, lured me into her cabin,

then gave me a quick drink and sent me packing.

Captain stubing: That's odd.

Doc: Odd?

A woman who'd pass up a chance like that

has got to be just a little strange.

I know, when she first passed me up for you,

I thought she was weird.

Well, what kind of man does she want?

Excuse me, sir, may I go ashore?

Oh, yes, go ahead, gopher.

Thank you.

Bonnie wants me to show me the sights.

[Laughter]

Buenos dias.

Now was the best night's sleep I've had in three months.

I'm glad I told you about the school in the east

instead of saving it.

- I'm glad you told me too. - Hi.

Hello.

Are you going into puerto vallarta today?

You know something, I was thinking, maybe Vicki

and I could go in together.

Oh, may I, dad?

Is it all right if they go ashore by themselves?

No problem.

Vicki's very familiar with puerto vallarta.

Do you mind, daddy?

We'll be back by 4.

Well, all right.

I want to have fun on this cruise, just be careful.

They grow up so fast.

Apparently so.

[Music playing]

You're going to love puerto vallarta.

I love it already.

Puerto vallarta, here we come.

Oh, gopher, honey, you don't have a camera.

And I would just love some pictures of us in town.

- I've got a camera. - Yeah.

Yeah, it's down in my cabin.

I'll tell you what.

I'll go down there and get the camera.

I'll change, and I'll meet you deck in two minutes.

Right.

All right.

[Music playing]

Good morning.

Good morning, is that all you got to say?

What do you mean?

Well, aren't you just overdoing it a little bit?

You didn't have to bring that Turkey

home to roost last night.

Doc?

Hey, you are forgetting why we're here.

I know, I know, Mary Lou.

Mary Lou, you mean Mary Beth.

Ok, ok.

Listen, what about the doc?

Is he a better kisser than the captain?

You know something, I can't decide.

Maybe you can help me.

What are you doing?

Just do what I tell you.

Now the captain put his arm around me like this,

and the other one like this.

Yeah.

Then we kissed.

[Music playing]

Now, that's the palpitating pucker technique.

Now doc, well, he kissed me like this.

[Music playing]

That's the pack man pucker technique.

Now what do you think?

Who was best.

That's a tough one, Bonnie, let's do it again.

Oh, I can't.

I got to meet gopher and do some more research.

Haven't you done enough research already?

Well, we got to find out who stole your girl.

That's what you want, isn't it?

I guess.

Bye.

Bye.

Hi, Marion, what are you doing?

Oh, just writing home about our honeymoon.

Tell me, Matt, do you spell wimp with a w or a w-h?

[Laughter]

Marion, this is a very sarcastic side of you

that I'm seeing.

Matt, if you don't tell your boss about us,

there won't be any more sides of me to see,

because I'll be gone.

All right, I promise I'll tell him just as soon as I can.

They make these best on this ship.

Looks like mother nature's taken its course

and helped solve our little predicament.

He's found someone else.

Ah, Marion, Stevens, there you are.

We we're looking for you.

I want you both to meet Loretta.

Glad to meet you.

Nice to meet you.

She's a knockout.

I'm glad you think so, because she's yours.

Mine?

Are you all right, Mr. Stevens?

Yeah, something just went down the wrong way.

Tell him.

Won't you sit down?

Oh, thank you.

Oh, over there, my dear.

Well, I'm glad that we're all here

together for the good news.

First, Loretta is free for the day and night.

Secondly, I am planning a big raise for you.

Oh, that's wonderful, sir.

Isn't there something else you wanted to tell Mr. Boggs?

Oh, yes.

Thanks for the raise.

Forget it, forget it.

Wow, Vicki, this is beautiful.

You get to come down here all the time?

Yeah, and it's amazing.

Each time it gets prettier and prettier.

[Music playing]

Vicki, how do you say I'm hungry in Spanish?

I don't know.

I'm too hungry to remember.

Let's eat.

Melissa, we have to get back to the ship.

I told you, Vicki, I'm not going back.

Melissa, that's crazy.

My father's probably all upset and your father's probably

out of his mind with worry.

My father doesn't care about me.

He doesn't even want me around.

Now, Melissa, you're not being fair to him or yourself.

You never even told him how you felt about pinehurst.

Whose side are you one anyway?

I'm on your side.

And I'm not saying that there isn't a problem.

But you can't fix it unless you go back and talk about it.

My father isn't your father, Vicki.

When you said I love you, it made a difference, didn't it?

Oh, Melissa, people can change.

Last night when you were dancing, you and your father

were two different people from when you came on board.

That's what I thought too.

But I was wrong.

I'm not going back, Vicki.

[Music playing]

Oh, Marion, you are such fun.

It is no wonder that we are all having such a good time.

So, Mr. Stevens, what are you going

to do with your new raise?

Spend it on girls?

No, no, not girls as such.

Tell us, Mr. Stevens, what do you

plan on doing with your raise?

Well, I thought I'd put it into the car, the house.

The alimony payments?

Marion, is something wrong with your hand?

No, nothing, just muscle spasms.

Oh, I have the perfect cure.

Let's just step out on the deck and give those spasms some air.

I don't think we ought to break up

our little group, not just yet.

Boggs: My dear, don't you worry.

I'm sure that Loretta will keep Steven's properly entertained.

Come along.

Honey--

yes?

Oh, no, no, not--

have you heard from the girls yet?

Excuse me, Isaac.

No, there's been no word so far.

Well, they're two hours late.

I don't know how you could let them go ashore alone.

I don't know how I could have agreed

to it, no matter what you said.

Mr. Weatherly, I've already sent Ms. McCoy and Dr. Bricker

into town to look for them.

Besides, I have every confidence in both our girls.

How much confidence do you have

in everybody else in puerto vallarta,

or any place in the world?

Captain, don't let him get you down.

I was the one who said let them go.

But Vicki knows her way around town.

She also knows her way back to the ship.

So where are they?

[Music playing]

Let's ask here.

[Speaking Spanish]

Gracias.

Ok, we'll split up and meet back

of the square in 30 minutes.

Ok.

[Music playing]

Gopher, thank you for a wonderful day.

Well, golly, listen, if you thought today was wonderful,

just wait until you see you tonight.

Bye.

Bye, you hear.

I hear.

Bonnie--

hi, what's the matter, you look upset.

Let's just call this whole thing off.

I mean, I ain't got the right to ask

you to throw yourself in front of a bunch

of guys you don't know.

But we can't call it off now.

I think I got your man.

What do you mean by that?

Well, I just got a hunch that gopher is it,

the world's greatest kisser.

And I'll know tonight.

Well, now, you know you don't have to do this for me.

Why not?

Aren't we best friends?

Yeah, I guess we are best friends.

Ok.

I'll see you.

See you later, best friend.

[Music playing]

Yes, yes, I understand.

I know what we're behind schedule

and I'm quite aware of the tides.

But I also know that I have a daughter ashore

and I have no intention of sailing without her.

Who was that?

The company representative.

Well, can he force you to sail?

This ship isn't going anywhere until both

our girls get back on board.

Look who we found.

Melissa.

Are you all right?

I'm fine.

Oh, I was worried sick about you.

Yeah, sure.

Captain, I'm sorry it's so late, it's my fault.

Young lady, do you realize you've held up the whole ship?

I said I was sorry.

Being sorry doesn't make up for the problems you've caused.

Then I won't bother saying it again.

We hope you enjoyed your stay in puerto vallarta.

Our next stop is the port of Los Angeles.

[Theme music, "the love boat"]

Chilly, isn't it?

That's why we have arms.

And it's getting late.

Nonsense, my dear.

We still have some important ground to cover.

Mr. Boggs, don't.

Take your hands off that woman.

Stevens, what's gotten into you?

Mr. Boggs, this woman, this woman, Mr. Boggs,

is the number one most important thing in my life.

She comes before boggs and company and everything else.

This woman is my wife.

Your wife?

I know I was supposed to bring her along,

but I love her very much.

And I can't stand to be without her.

All right, all right, Stevens, calm down.

I understand.

You do?

Of course I do.

But I hope you understand, you're fired.

[Music playing]

Well, looks like we've lost it all.

No, now we've got it all.

[Music playing]

I don't think I was cut out to be a father.

I don't know how to handle it.

A good boarding school is the only intelligent answer.

That depends, what's the question?

What do you mean?

Because you can't deal with being a parent or you

don't want to deal with it?

I want to do what's right for Melissa, what's best for her.

I don't think I'm it.

Because you might make a mistake?

Because I might make a lot of mistakes.

I already have.

Oh, I don't know.

I've seen you do a few things that look pretty right to me.

Mistakes don't really count.

Not as much as the love.

The voice of experience?

Painful experience.

But I discovered there was more of myself

to give than I thought.

You know, a parent doesn't have to be perfect, thank god.

But he does have to be there.

[Music playing]

Well, it's one of my favorite places.

But I only take people there that I think are very special.

Oh, gopher, is my lipstick smeared?

No.

Well, isn't it about time it was?

[Music playing]

Mmm.

Mmm.

Don't fight it, it's bigger than both of us.

You say that again, look out.

Nobody steals my girl.

Bonnie: Oh, sawdust, no.

He isn't the world's greatest kisser,

and he didn't steal Mary Beth.

Sawdust: Who's talking about Mary Beth now, Bonnie?

You're my girl.

You dummy, I've always been your girl, sawdust.

You're killing me.

[Music playing]

Excuse me, can I have your attention, please?

Thank you.

Listen, I don't know what's going on here.

But I would just like to say one thing,

quantity will never replace quality.

[Laughter]

[Music playing]

[Knock on door]

Come in.

I thought we should talk.

I know you don't think we can, but maybe I

can change your mind.

Whatever you say.

I say I've made some mistakes since you come to live with me.

I've been leading my own life for quite a long while.

And then suddenly, there you were,

someone I really cared about, someone I

wanted to do the very best for.

You really did?

Yes.

Deep down, I wasn't sure I could.

I was afraid I couldn't.

I didn't know how to handle it.

And I panicked.

I went from trying so hard to please you

I was tying us both in knots to boarding school.

That was running away from responsibility,

as far as I could get.

But I was doing it not because I didn't love you,

but because I did.

Pinehurst is a fine school, but if you went there,

it would cheat us out of the precious years

we have left, before you really go out on your own.

I would hate to miss them.

I think we've missed too much already.

But you said to me at dinner, from now on is what counts.

I hope you still think so.

Dad--

[Theme music, "the love boat"]

So what we were really doing was looking for the ship's

officer that, well, Mary Beth said was

the world's greatest kisser.

That's the wildest story I ever heard.

But you said the officer was transferred.

Yes, he's on another Princess liner.

Oh.

Which one.

I'd still like a word with him.

Are you still mad at him?

No, I'd just like to thank him.

Doc: Sawdust, may I ask Bonnie a personal question?

Who's the world's greatest kisser, right?

[Music playing]

Him.

That's my girl.

- Bye. - Bye.

Bye.

Well, good bye, it's been nice having you with us.

Thank you.

I know we'll see you again real soon.

Only if you're hiring.

Boggs: Stevens.

Sorry, Mr. Boggs, you can't fire me twice.

Oh, oh the contrary, my boy.

I have had a change of heart.

You mean I can have my job back?

Boggs: Most certainly.

I would expect to see you Monday morning, bright and early.

No, Mr. Boggs.

I'll see you two weeks from Monday.

I'm taking my wife on a honeymoon.

Stevens.

Ahem.

Well, of course you are.

Consider it my wedding gift.

I wonder what changed his mind.

Maybe it was when I said I looked

forward to meeting his wife and telling her all about our trip.

I'm glad you and Melissa have worked things out.

Me too.

But I must admit, i'm still a little nervous

about raising a daughter.

Whoever said father knows best, never met me.

Ready to go?

Yeah, dad.

Hey, Vicki, remember, I want you to come visit us.

Oh, I'd love to.

It's going to be great.

Dad and I are going to be a family again.

He's going to buy a big house and I'm going

to cook him dinner every night.

Oh, well, that's terrific.

Hey, do you think this afternoon would be too soon

for me to come and visit you?

Bye-bye

bye.

Bye-bye.

So, she's going to cook for her father.

When are you going to cook for your father?

I did once.

Remember that souffle I made you?

Yes, I do.

Forget I asked.

[Laughter]

[Music playing]

[Theme music, "the love boat"]