Original subtitles

(film reel spinning)

Downloaded from YTS.MX

(gentle melody)

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- [Narrator] Strasshof, a prosperous suburb of Vienna.

Natascha Kampusch was imprisoned here

for eight and a half years.

This is her story.

(speaking in foreign language)

- [Translator] What I've learned about people is this,

no one is infallible.

And anyone can find themselves in a position

where they lose control of their lives.

(speaking foreign language)

That's true for the kidnapper and it's true for me.

From the moment I was kidnapped,

I still had control of my thoughts,

but I couldn't do anything about the world outside.

(speaking foreign language)

And the perpetrator had blown a couple of fuses in his head.

And he couldn't control his life either.

Or he wouldn't have done what he did.

(eerie melody)

(crowd chattering)

(speaking foreign language) - [Translator] I'm an outcast.

I have a sign on my forehead that says,

"crime victim."

(speaking foreign language)

I think everyone has preconceptions about me.

Maybe when I'm older, people will forget

what happened to me.

(speaking in foreign language)

- [Newscaster] Since yesterday evening,

a ten-year-old girl has been missing

in Vienna's Donaustadt district.

Natascha wears glasses, she's one meter, 45 tall,

has light brown hair with a fringe, and blue eyes.

She's been missing for more than 34 hours.

All efforts to locate her have been unsuccessful,

and the police are widening their search.

(speaks in foreign language)

- [Interpreter] My mother always said,

"Never part after an argument,

"because something could happen to one of us,

"and we'd never see each other again."

And then, it happened.

(speaks in foreign language)

- [Translator] She rarely went to school alone.

But on that particular day she did.

I watched her from the window as she left and

walked towards the shopping center.

Then she disappeared, and that was it.

(speaking foreign language)

I was almost half way to school, when I saw a man

in the distance, standing in front of a

white van, as though he were waiting for someone.

I wanted to cross the street.

But then I decided to keep going straight.

(speaking foreign language)

when I came nearer he came towards me.

Grabbed me and...

Dragged me into his truck.

I tried to scream, but no sound came out.

My voice box froze, no sound.

The kidnapper said, if I didn't scream and

didn't stand up, and did what he said.

He wouldn't hurt me.

(car engine running)

(speaking foreign language)

I didn't know what was going to happen.

In that moment, I thought it was the end.

(speaking foreign language)

I kind of new the neighborhood from that angle.

'Cause when I used to drive home with my mother,

I'd see the tree tops and telephone poles.

So I knew roughly where we were headed.

(emergency brake grinding)

(car doors open)

(car door closes)

(speaking foreign language)

Then he drove the white truck up to his garage.

Wrapped me in a blue blanket and carried me into

the house.

(ominous music)

(speaking foreign language)

He carried me downstairs, and put me down

for a moment.

I didn't know it then,

but he's opened everything up, then he dragged me

and carried me in.

(speaking foreign language)

Then he left me in the cell, on the floor.

In the dark.

(eerie sounds)

(speaking foreign language)

Natascha was always on time.

So when she was 10 minutes late, i thought

to myself, where is she?

I'm going to call the child minder.

but no one answered, i called half an hour later,

and they told me she'd never arrived.

At that moment I nearly fainted.

I knew something had happened.

(eerie music)

It was as if the earth had just opened up,

and swallowed her.

(eerie sounds)

(speaking foreign language) I just sat there and counted

to myself, up to 21.

21 seconds, and then to 60,

and on and on.

So I knew roughly, how long I had been there.

But at some point I lost track.

(eerie sounds)

That first day he brought me a mattress.

It was just 5 centimeters thick, and made of

foam rubber.

I only had the same blue blanket to cover me.

And I had to use my jacket as a pillow.

I wanted to keep my dress on, day and night.

I didn't want to give up anything.

Or reveal anything about myself.

He'd taken away my school bag,

and he burned my shoes in the first two days.

He said I wouldn't need them.

(monitors beeping)

- [Narrator] A massive search is launched

by police.

Starting at the housing estate,

where Natascha lives.

Concerned citizens are calling in

with information.

(helicopter engine)

Soon the police have evidence, of an abduction.

(electronic music) (speaking foreign language)

- [News Reporter] Austrian police are

investigating the disappearance of 10 year old,

Natascha Kampusch.

Who was last seen walking to school,

on March the 2nd.

(speaking foreign language)

She had about a two kilometer walk to school.

Starting from her home, on the Rennbahn Estate.

Half way along there's a roundabout on the

Melangasse.

At approximately 7:20 a.m. that Monday morning,

a girl standing at the roundabout, says she saw

another girl in a red anorak, being forced into

a white truck, parked on the right side of

the road.

(speaking foreign language)

- [Translator] At first I had no way to

contact my kidnapper.

If I needed something.

He just came everyday.

Sometimes when he didn't close all the

doors behind him, he could hear me knocking.

(eerie sounds)

And then he installed an intercom system,

so I could communicate with him.

(eerie sounds)

I couldn't tell if it was day or night,

because my inner clock had gone haywire.

- [Narrator} Years Later, the entrance to

Natascha's cell is discovered in the garage,

beneath a disguised trap door.

Down below a heavy cupboard and tires,

must be shoved aside.

They reveal a safe, 70 centimeters high,

screwed flush with the wall.

Behind that, the half meter thick wall has been

hollowed out.

To get in you had to crawl backwards through

the hole.

And then close, a 150 kilo, steel and concrete

door behind you.

(eerie music)

Finally, you turn left.

To open the double wooden doors, and step down,

into a 5 square meter cell.

(speaking foreign language)

- [Translator] It probably took him an hour,

or so to open the cell.

If he was working fast, or he hadn't locked

everything, it was a bit less.

(speaking foreign language)

the effort was enormous, pushing everything aside

and opening everything up.

If anything had happened to him, or he had been

taken ill, he'd never had got it open.

I would have been sealed up like an Egyptian

pharaoh, buried alive, dead and mummified.

- [Narrator] The statement by the young witness,

triggers an enormous investigation.

Police question 1,520 owners of white trucks.

And 650 other people.

Including a man from Strasshof, half an hour

from the center of Vienna.

A township with one main street.

No real center.

And 8,000 inhabitants.

(electronic tribal music)

The man's name is Wolfgang Priklopil.

An unmarried 35 year old communications

technician, with no criminal record.

Priklopil lives in his mothers house.

Where two investigators question him.

His truck is full of rubble from a building site.

He claims to have been at home on the day of

the crime.

But has no one to confirm his story.

Police have no probable cause to search

his house.

They take Polaroids of his truck, write a report,

and file it.

(speaking foreign language)

- [Male Translator] I met Priklopil at Siemens.

We did our vocational training there,

in the early 1980's.

And we both worked there.

Later I set up a company, renovating apartments,

and I hired Priklopil, because I knew

he was a reliable person.

(birds chirping)

(beeping)

(speaking foreign language)

- [Translator] Later on he installed a timer.

The lights went on at a particular time, and then

it went dark.

Like in a prison, where the lights go off,

at 8 p.m.

(water dripping)

Every drop of water meant more mold.

It was humid and wet in the little room.

And there were al kinds of insects there,

it smelled musty.

It was very cold and damp.

Really disgusting.

(speaking foreign language)

And the ventilator was a kind of torture.

It was very loud.

(buzzing sound)

And when it rotated for a long tie, it became

hot, the blades began to melt.

And then it didn't just make that droning noise.

But another annoying sound.

- Tock, tock, tock, tock, tock, tock.

(speaking foreign language)

Tock, tock, tock, tock, tock.

- [Translator] That went on, until the fan

was broken.

(whirring sound)

(eerie music)

I began to get a sense for when he was coming.

I would become very nervous.

And then I hear the sounds of him unscrewing

the safe, and opening the concrete door.

(speaking foreign language)

Lots of pounding noises.

I'd sense it in advance somehow.

(speaking foreign language) And I'd get palpitations.

My whole body would go into knots.

My stomach, would twist into knots.

I'd break out in a cold sweat, and I'd feel

really queasy.

(eerie sounds)

(speaking foreign language)

- [Male Translator] I remember,

that Priklopil asked me once,

before the kidnapping, when we were renovating

a flat.

How one could effectively install,

sound insulation, to reduce the noise of a

hammer drill.

(speaking foreign language)

I told him that cement is a good insulation

against voices, but rock wall would be the best

thing to suppress the sound of a hammer drill.

(speaking foreign language)

I was horrified, horrified to discover from the

police investigations, that he used exactly

this information to build the cell.

(monitors beeping)

- [Narrator] Special investigators in Vienna,

receive a second tip-off about

Wolfgang Priklopil, eight days after his

initial questioning.

The informant is a police dog handler,

who lives in Strasshof.

He reports on a neighbor, a reclusive man

who owns a white truck.

He's a shy loaner, and protects his house

with electronic surveillance systems.

He may store weapons there, and he's thought to

have a sexual interest in children.

The officer has never learned his name.

But provides a description.

The special task force, immediately orders

local police in Strassof, to check the

man's address.

(electronic music)

Then a fax arrives.

Wolfgang Priklopil, isn't registered as living

at the house.

His mother is.

Priklopil is only staying there.

His truck was checked on the 6th of April.

The tip-off is filed, and forgotten.

Natascha Kampusch has disappeared into thin air.

(clock ticking) (eerie music)

(speaking foreign language) - [Translator] Sometimes,

when I was giving her pictures a dust in the

living room, I would hold them to my chest

or kiss them, and i said,

"don't give up, you're a strong, strong child."

(soft music)

(speaking foreign language)

At first I didn't have to help him with his work.

Because he was afraid that, if I came upstairs,

I might attack him with the tools.

But when he was sure I was too scared of him

to run away...

He let me out.

But he made sure everything was locked,

so I couldn't get out.

(eerie music)

(speaking foreign language)

I didn't see any daylight for a long , long time.

Then, when I finally came upstairs, I still

didn't see any.

Even though it was daytime.

Because he closed the blinds.

He began integrating me more and more

into his household.

Until I became a, kind of slave.

He always made sure I couldn't run away.

He threatened me and kept everything locked.

It must have been incredibly gratifying for him,

to keep someone captive, someone who was there

for him alone.

Someone not even his mother or grandmother

knew about.

(speaking foreign language)

- [Male Translator] From the time that Natascha

Kampusch was kidnapped, I visited his house about

twice a year.

But never notice anything unusual.

Priklopil, was very concerned with hygiene,

and cleanliness, and he was extremely frugal.

(speaking foreign language)

- [Translator] On the one hand, he could afford

a BMW.

But on the other, he let me go hungry.

That's cruel.

For the money, he spent on a tank full of petrol,

I could have survived for one or two weeks.

Or even longer.

Depending on how much he gave me to eat.

Isn't that macabre?

(eerie music)

(speaking foreign language)

Sometimes when I went to the police to identify

things, I felt I was going to my own execution.

I'd have to go somewhere near the school, or near

my flat, because they'd found a bag,

and wanted to know if it belonged to Natascha.

Sometimes it was a shoe in a bush, or a pair of

panties in a car, or a red jacket in a garage.

I was always so relieved, when I saw that none

of these things were Natascha's.

(speaking foreign language)

If I had some skin cream, I rubbed some into the

wooden boards of my bed, because it was a

bit like furniture polish.

I did a lot of dusting, and at the weekends,

because I got used to doing it with my mother.

When I had time.

When was locked up, I sorted things out, tidied

everything up, and I dusted.

(whirring noise)

(speaking foreign language) He was obsessed with cleaning.

And of course he was constantly wiping off things

that I might have touched.

I wasn't really supposed to touch anything,

because of course fingerprints leave ugly,

greasy marks.

He would punish me if he found a

fingerprint anywhere.

Not only because it was potentially dangerous

to find my fingerprints in his house.

But because he hated the look of fingerprints,

on hi household surfaces.

He would grab me by the wrist, and use the back

of my hand, to wipe the prints off the

refrigerator or the door frame.

(ominous music)

Right at the beginning, he made me wear plastic

bags on my head.

I stitched them together, and attached them with

a rubber band.

It was horrible because, the color came off onto

my skin and it hurt because, I had to fix it with

clips and rubber bands.

It would have been easier, just to tuck the hair

under the plastic.

But he insisted on the clips and grips, and they

dug into my scalp and hurt.

It was tight.

Really unpleasant.

it made me frown all the time, it was horrible.

Then he said, if I shaved my

head it wouldn't be so bad.

And it was torture.

So when he trusted me enough, I got a pair of

scissors, blunt of course.

So I couldn't harm myself.

And I used the to cut my hair.

And then he saw that.

He said, he might as well cut it all off.

And he did.

(eerie music)

(speaking foreign language) There were times when

the torture, and the humiliation were so bad,

that I run to the window and shouted for

the police, the he'd grab me really roughly and

choked me and hit me.

(eerie sounds)

(speaking foreign language) So of course, sometimes

I would rather be in my cell,

than have to leave it...

To do something that I didn't want to.

Like help him work.

Something he did when he was sick,

not at first but later.

I had to come up, and I'd have to make him soup

or tea, and then he'd take me down again.

It was very...

Frustrating.

Because when he was sick, he'd completely forget,

that I have my needs to.

That I might want to eat too,

or need some daylight.

Or I want to wash myself.

(monitors beeping)

- [Narrator] The pressure is building on the

police to get results.

They decide to tap the telephone of

Nataschas's mother.

They hope the kidnapper will try to get in touch.

A caller claims to be holding Natascha captive.

Bt it's a hoax.

One of many.

(eerie music)

(speaking foreign language) Going hungry was dreadful.

You almost feel like a drug addict,

and ask yourself, why am I hungry?

Why do I even feel hunger?

Why can't I manage without food?

(speaking foreign language) He would show me all the food

there was, before he gave me anything to eat.

But then he'd only cut off a tiny piece for me.

He decided exactly how much I got to eat.

He never let me have what I wanted, or as much

as I wanted.

Because he said, I moved around so little

in the cell, I didn't need it.

(eerie music)

(lamp clicks)

He didn't want me to cry, and each time

I did, he rubbed my tears into my face with the

back of his hand.

Or he took me by the throat, and dragged me,

choking me, to the bathroom.

Where he held my face over the sink,

so I couldn't cry anymore.

He wouldn't let me cry, because he was afraid,

the hydrochloric acid in my tears,

would corrode his tiles.

(wind chimes)

He always forced me to look him straight in

the eye or look down at the ground,

in a very submissive way.

Of course I couldn't do that for long.

Because I won't be forced to do anything against

my will.

(speaking foreign language) And of course he got back

at me because of that.

He kept telling me I'm useless and worthless.

And that I'll never have a chance to escape.

(ominous tone)

He just liked having someone to dominate.

And the more I resisted and answered back,

the more satisfying it was for him to put

me down and dominate me.

To boost his own self esteem.

He despised people.

He hated his neighbors,

although he was nice to them.

He hated his surroundings and society.

Though he pretended to be a conformist.

(speaking foreign language)

- [Male Translator] Priklopil was an only child.

And after the death of his father, he developed

a very intense relationship with his mother.

(speaking foreign language)

He placed high demands on women.

They had to be well groomed, slender, and blonde.

Of course, these were hard demands to fulfill.

(ominous sound)

- [Narrator] A private detective with his own

theories about the crime, mounts a campaign,

against the police's handling

of the investigation.

As a result, 120 files have to be transferred,

to a new police commission.

By the end, there will be 167 files.

Natascha's body, has supposedly been buried,

in an allotment.

Nothing is found, a year later, the private

detective insists on another dig.

He suspects Natascha's mother.

(speaking foreign language) - [Translator] The private

detective cooked up a theory, that I was

having an affair with a business man,

and Natascha was in the way.

So we murdered her, and buried her in

a pond he owned.

And the detective kept on at the police about

digging there, until they agreed.

And of course, they found nothing.

(eerie music)

You are locked up there in the dark.

There's no electricity and you're hungry.

And then, yes you think to yourself,

"what's the point?"

"Why not put an end to all this?"

But then you come to the conclusion,

that you mustn't give up.

Because the whole thing is such a

monstrous injustice,

you mustn't allow yourself to be defeated.

It was a kind of fighting spirit,

that kept me alive.

(birds singing)

(speaking foreign language)

He had lots of books.

And he'd probably kept all the books,

he had to read in school.

And then, I got them.

Later, he went out and bought me

non-fiction books.

Because I liked them.

And some dictionaries, and books on philosophy.

(eerie music)

(speaking foreign language)

I wanted to learn and discover things

in my own way.

So I asked him, to set me tests from math books.

He was good at math, so I asked him to mark the

tests for me, and he did.

But unfortunately, it's the way he did it.

He found mistakes everywhere, and because

he had this controlling side, and he wanted

to dominate me.

He just crossed everything out in red ink.

All that time I felt he wanted to be like some

old fashioned teacher.

"I'm in charge here."

And that's probably how he was

treated in his childhood.

(speaking foreign language)

- [Male Translator] I appreciated the fact that

he was always polite and very reliable.

On the other hand, he was rather shy, and a bit

introverted.

(speaking foreign language)

- [Translator] He always tried not to

offend anyone, and I'm sure he was a very

obliging person, neighbor, son and grandson.

(eerie music)

(whirring noise)

(speaking foreign language)

Sometime later, the Vienna City Council

offered their help.

They said something I shall never forget

to this day.

I should buy a grave, or plot, so I could have

a place to go to talk to Natascha.

I left the office, sat in my car,

and burst into tears.

I couldn't even drive home.

My child is alive, she isn't dead.

Natascha was never dead for me.

No one ever showed me any proof.

There was no evidence to the contrary.

So I always believed, Natascha was alive.

Right through the eight and a half years.

(eerie music)

(whooshing sound)

(speaking foreign language)

After a few years, I could go out into the

garden with him.

Sometimes at night, for five or 10 minutes.

I was so happy I could touch the trees

and the hedge, and I could feel the grass

and the wind on my skin.

Because of course, there's no wind in the house.

And it was so good.

I asked him, if I could take a twig from

the hedge, back down to my cell.

So I could always think about it,

as a kind of memento.

Who takes something from the garden

into the house, to remember it by.

(birds chirping) (ominous music)

(speaking foreign language)

For a while I kept a diary.

A kind of workbook, where I wrote down

everything I did in the house.

Clearing up this, cleaning that.

Siliconing.

I had to wash every towel by hand before it could

be laid.

I had to check every tile for floors, because

of course, he wouldn't use any tile

that wasn't perfect.

I squeezed out sponges, shoveled rubble, carried

heavy packets of tiles.

It was exhausting.

I was extremely weak and thin.

(eerie music)

(speaking foreign language)

The first few years I baked a cake for

Natascha on her birthday.

And chucked it away after a couple of weeks.

But I always tried to keep Natascha alive

in my mind.

To include her wherever she was, I tried to

let her know somehow, maybe by telepathy,

that I was thinking of her.

(speaking foreign language)

On my birthday, I always remembered all the

birthdays I had celebrated with lots of other

kids, and with a special cake.

(speaking foreign language)

And how different it is now, all alone,

in the cell.

(light music)

(speaking foreign language) Well, of course,

at the beginning nothing.

The kidnapping of course but,

all the humiliation, and the other things

didn't come 'til later.

Then I really began to hate him.

For the way he was torturing me.

But maybe the secret, the reason I survived

all those years.

Was because, I forgave him for everything.

Almost as soon as it happened.

I think if I hadn't forgiven him,

I would have been so full of hate.

And negative feelings, that it would have become

unbearable, and it

would have destroyed me physically.

(wind chimes ringing)

The kind of crime he committed,

is usually the result of some illness,

or injury.

And the person can't usually do anything

about an illness.

(speaking foreign language)

But this criminal still had a conscience.

He still had a conscience.

He was aware on some level, of what he was doing.

You could see that he was weak and unstable.

Because of some kind of illness or injury.

He had become so unstable, that he saw the

kidnapping as the solution to his problems.

It didn't matter what the problems really were.

Or how he thought this could help.

But he did see it as a solution.

(speaking foreign language)

That actually made me feel pity and compassion

for him, because may people are looking

for the meaning of their lives.

And many fail.

Some commit suicide, others take a wrong turning.

And he thought, that if life hadn't given him

what he wanted, he must take it by force.

He felt, that he must become like everything that

had inured him, and made him ill.

- [Narrator] Seven years have passed, since

Natascha Kampusch's kidnapping.

Seven years in which she has grown into

a young woman.

No one would recognize her now.

They're still looking for her, or rather

for a name, in police files.

And that allows her kidnapper to take her out

into the city.

Even to work for him, renovating an apartment.

Many people ask why I didn't simply run away,

while he was busy.

But he always made sure I was carrying

something heavy. Or there was some other reason,

I couldn't just run.

He was very good at keeping up the pressure.

And we'd be out in his van, and I wasn't

allowed to speak to anyone.

He said he'd kill anyone I spoke to.

Or he'd kill me and anyone who'd seen me.

It was hopeless.

(eerie music)

Once, we were on the way to the hardware store,

we got caught in a traffic jam.

And there was a police check point,

up ahead of us.

There was a rather stocky policeman there.

A friendly type.

But he didn't look too intelligent.

And, I tried to signal him with my eyes,

that something was wrong.

But he didn't pick it up.

He probably thought I was mentally disturbed,

or epileptic or something.

Anyway he didn't notice or ask any questions.

He just checked the car documents,

and waved us through.

If someone jumps out of a car and starts pounding

on the windows of other cars, they don't look

especially normal or trustworthy.

The way I looked at the time,

so thin and pale.

People might have thought I was crazy,

or a drug addict.

(speaking foreign language) - [Male Translator] I own an

event hall, and in July, 2006,

Priklopil called me, and told me he wanted to

borrow my trailer.

(speaking foreign language)

- [Translator] And one evening we drove to this hall.

He had to pick up a trailer he owned.

Or he owned with Holzapfel.

And then I saw Holzapfel, but I didn't know

if he was his accomplice, or if he would

believe me, because he obviously his best friend.

(speaking foreign language)

- [Male Translator] When he came, he was accompanied

by a young girl.

I saw the girl as I opened the door to the hole

and he introduced her to me as an acquaintance.

I shook her hand and said hello.

(speaking foreign language)

- [Translator] It was hardly a situation where

I could have said something.

So I didn't try to escape.

I just did what I was supposed to do.

Shook his hand, and said nothing.

The way he'd drummed it into me.

(speaking foreign language)

- [Male Translator] Then I had to leave,

because I was under time pressure.

(whirring sound)

(rattling sound)

- [Natascha] ♪ I got everything that you want ♪

♪ Like a heart that's oh so true ♪

♪ Just call on me and send it along ♪

♪ With love from me to you ♪

(speaking foreign language)

- [Translator] I could have committed suicide.

Thought it was much better to be dead than

locked up for good.

But that day, thank heavens, I found

the courage and just ran away.

(monitors beeping)

(violin music)

(speaking foreign language)

- [News Reporter] At 1:04 p.m. today, a confused

young girl was discovered in a garden in the town

of Strasshof.

When police arrived, the young woman claimed

to be Natascha Kampusch.

(gate closing)

(speaking foreign language) - [Translator] He was talking

on his cell phone.

And he'd told me to vacuum the van,

which I was doing.

The noise was so loud, that he walked over to

the swimming pool.

Maybe 11 meters away.

He'd left the garden gate open,

unlocked.

So I grabbed the opportunity.

I left the vacuum cleaner on,

and ran away.

Really, really fast.

As fast as my legs could carry me.

(monitors beeping)

- [News Reporter] When they searched the house,

police found a prison cell in the garage.

- [News Anchor] It has just been reported,

that the alleged kidnapper,

has committed suicide.

(speaking foreign language) - [Translator] Then apparently

he drove to the train station,

and he laid down on the tracks.

Then the train ran over his head.

Then he was dead.

- [Narrator] Natascha Kampusch becomes a media

star over night.

Darling of the world's press.

The missed tip-off, from the police dog

handler, causes a political storm.

There's talks of cover ups, mistakes,

half truths.

Austria's scandal-wrapped government, resigns two

years later.

The papers, spread rumors of sadomasochism,

child pornography rings,

and possible accomplices.

(speaking foreign language) - [Translator] Of course they

want to make headlines.

Child pornography and Natascha Kampusch,

are linked all the time.

That's so painful.

No sadomasochists.

No pornography ring came by.

As far as I was concerned, I only had contact

with the kidnapper.

Did he do something like that?

I don't think so because he didn't have the time.

But we'll never know.

We could only ask him, and he would probably deny

everything.

But no one would believe him, because people

like to hear stories about sadomasochism and

child porn rings.

That's the way it is.

People love horrible things and they can't get

enough of them.

They seek them out and exaggerate them,

and embellish them.

Make them even more terrible and disgusting,

and revolting, and vile.

(whirring sound) (footsteps)

(door closing)

(speaking foreign language) The press ask me straight out,

whether I was raped or sexually abused,

and that kind of thing.

But in my eyes, the way that media treated me

after my escape, is a form of abuse too.

And they should be punished for it.

(eerie music)

In many people, I trigger some kind of

unconscious aggression.

Maybe the whole crime or what happened to me,

triggers aggression.

And I'm the only one they can still reach.

And so it all lands on me.

Right from the start, I said I'm not a victim.

Because I knew, that if I present myself as a

victim, and show everyone how terrible it was,

they'd never accept me as a normal person again.

They'd say, "you, you've debased yourself so far,

"what do you think you're doing here?"

"Go back where you came from, go back down to

"your filthy swamp."

That's how most people are.

That's how they think.

I just want people to treat me normally.

I deserve a chance like anyone else.

I think people should be glad,

I half way survived all this. (eerie music)