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1
00:00:45,200 --> 00:00:46,320
-I love you!
-Jesus!
2
00:00:47,000 --> 00:00:47,880
I fancy you.
3
00:00:48,240 --> 00:00:49,040
Yeah, I...
4
00:00:50,440 --> 00:00:51,720
Fancy you, too.
5
00:00:51,960 --> 00:00:52,760
Hm.
6
00:00:54,240 --> 00:00:57,000
-That's nice.
-Oh, crazy, huh?
7
00:00:57,280 --> 00:00:59,240
[Irish accent] I don't remember a t'ing!
8
00:00:59,520 --> 00:01:01,040
Good luck at work today. Mwah!
9
00:01:06,960 --> 00:01:08,040
[theme song playing]
10
00:01:19,160 --> 00:01:21,280
I feel just fantastic!
11
00:01:22,040 --> 00:01:23,880
Isn't it just a fantastic day?
12
00:01:24,160 --> 00:01:25,280
It's a marvelous day!
13
00:01:25,440 --> 00:01:28,880
Well, come and do the Fantastic Marvelous
Day Dance with me, then.
14
00:01:28,960 --> 00:01:30,720
-OK!
-Oh!
15
00:01:30,800 --> 00:01:32,400
Oh! [exclaims]
16
00:01:32,480 --> 00:01:33,560
I love this place!
17
00:01:33,640 --> 00:01:34,640
[laughs]
18
00:01:36,640 --> 00:01:37,720
[snoring]
19
00:01:40,320 --> 00:01:41,800
Would you ever let me bum you?
20
00:01:41,960 --> 00:01:43,920
[laughing]
21
00:01:45,120 --> 00:01:46,440
No!
22
00:01:46,600 --> 00:01:48,480
I like putting things in other things.
23
00:01:48,720 --> 00:01:51,440
I think you'd get into it.
It's good for angry men.
24
00:01:51,600 --> 00:01:54,000
Between you and Will,
25
00:01:54,360 --> 00:01:56,960
I cannot turn around
without fearing for my sphincter.
26
00:01:57,280 --> 00:01:58,520
I'm going to have to buy
a little shield for it.
27
00:01:58,600 --> 00:02:00,520
-Will?
-The man can't take his eyes off my hole.
28
00:02:01,400 --> 00:02:03,880
I can feel them boring through my jeans
every time I bend over.
29
00:02:04,040 --> 00:02:06,680
You genuinely think everybody
fancies you, don't you?
30
00:02:06,760 --> 00:02:07,560
They do.
31
00:02:09,560 --> 00:02:10,560
[exhales sharply]
32
00:02:13,120 --> 00:02:14,840
[indistinct chatter outside]
33
00:02:17,800 --> 00:02:20,000
-Perk your aunt's morning up.
-Get out!
34
00:02:22,640 --> 00:02:23,800
Oh, shit!
35
00:02:24,320 --> 00:02:25,800
What?
36
00:02:25,880 --> 00:02:27,440
It's "get out" time, baby cakes.
37
00:02:29,240 --> 00:02:30,440
They're knocking us down.
38
00:02:32,960 --> 00:02:35,080
Where will all these people go?
39
00:02:35,160 --> 00:02:38,240
This is what happens.
If you want to live like this,
40
00:02:38,320 --> 00:02:40,040
then you have to leave like this.
41
00:02:41,200 --> 00:02:45,920
OK. Pack what you like.
The rest, we keep for firewood.
42
00:03:15,520 --> 00:03:16,880
You're the secret flower man?
43
00:03:16,960 --> 00:03:19,840
So? Nothing wrong with brightening up
the place a bit.
44
00:03:19,920 --> 00:03:20,720
Do you want one?
45
00:03:21,600 --> 00:03:22,680
[chuckles] Thanks!
46
00:03:24,800 --> 00:03:26,480
Hey, Sam.
47
00:03:26,640 --> 00:03:28,200
Where are you going to move to?
48
00:03:28,280 --> 00:03:31,080
Oh, heard a rumor of an old fire station
down south.
49
00:03:31,440 --> 00:03:33,200
So, thought I might slide in there.
50
00:03:33,480 --> 00:03:34,680
OK. Nice!
51
00:03:34,840 --> 00:03:35,640
I just thought, maybe...
52
00:03:36,560 --> 00:03:38,760
Could I come with you?
53
00:03:39,440 --> 00:03:42,160
Just thought it would be nice
to stick together.
54
00:03:43,200 --> 00:03:44,520
-Sure. Whatever.
-Really?
55
00:03:44,800 --> 00:03:48,040
Yeah, let's do it! You tell anyone
that I am Flower Man,
56
00:03:48,120 --> 00:03:50,560
that is going somewhere it ain't getting
photosynthsizzled.
57
00:03:50,640 --> 00:03:52,160
-Cross my heart.
-[chuckles]
58
00:03:56,160 --> 00:03:57,080
-[sniffs]
-[sniffs]
59
00:03:58,640 --> 00:03:59,640
[soft chuckle]
60
00:04:01,520 --> 00:04:04,040
-Pretending?
-And now she's pretending
61
00:04:04,120 --> 00:04:06,600
that she never said
that she was pretending.
62
00:04:06,680 --> 00:04:08,880
Well, I think you are both
dealing with it really well.
63
00:04:09,040 --> 00:04:10,320
-[sighs]
-You guys are the dream.
64
00:04:10,400 --> 00:04:11,640
Thank God you're getting married.
65
00:04:11,720 --> 00:04:13,560
What am I supposed to do now?
Do I remind her?
66
00:04:13,720 --> 00:04:17,400
No! Just pretend you don't know
she's pretending
67
00:04:17,560 --> 00:04:19,120
she never said she was pretending!
68
00:04:19,280 --> 00:04:20,640
-[sighs]
-[chuckles]
69
00:04:21,320 --> 00:04:22,240
Hey...
70
00:04:24,560 --> 00:04:26,440
-[burps]
-Argh!
71
00:04:26,720 --> 00:04:28,120
No! No! I...
72
00:04:28,200 --> 00:04:29,920
-I've never laughed at that!
-[giggling]
73
00:04:30,000 --> 00:04:30,960
Ever!
74
00:04:31,960 --> 00:04:33,880
-What did you do last night?
-No one.
75
00:04:34,480 --> 00:04:37,640
I can't believe they can evict people
on a weekend.
76
00:04:38,480 --> 00:04:39,720
-[sighs]
-It's Monday.
77
00:04:40,070 --> 00:04:40,920
[scoffs] Shut up.
78
00:04:43,840 --> 00:04:44,640
Yeah.
79
00:04:45,240 --> 00:04:46,240
-No.
-Yeah.
80
00:04:46,320 --> 00:04:47,640
What? Fuck!
81
00:04:48,000 --> 00:04:50,560
No, I have to go now! Like, now now!
82
00:04:50,640 --> 00:04:52,800
Like, what happened to Sunday?
83
00:04:52,960 --> 00:04:55,160
Oh, I'm so sweaty!
84
00:04:55,240 --> 00:04:57,160
[stutters] Do these
look like pajamas?
85
00:04:57,800 --> 00:04:58,840
Not at all.
86
00:05:05,360 --> 00:05:07,840
-I made you cafe. Un cafe pour...
-Brilliant!
87
00:05:08,000 --> 00:05:10,320
-D'accord.
-Merci.
88
00:05:10,480 --> 00:05:12,000
Happy eviction, everybody!
89
00:05:12,280 --> 00:05:13,600
What a palaver, eh?
90
00:05:13,760 --> 00:05:15,280
This is insane!
91
00:05:15,440 --> 00:05:17,200
-Brekkie, Fred?
-Hey, Freddy Chops, are you ready?
92
00:05:17,360 --> 00:05:18,920
Oh, uh, Will's giving me
a lift this morning.
93
00:05:19,080 --> 00:05:21,400
I'm at Samaritans this morning.
It's just round the corner.
94
00:05:21,560 --> 00:05:22,480
Samaritans Samaritans?
95
00:05:22,560 --> 00:05:25,040
Yeah, people call up
in distress, looking for...
96
00:05:25,280 --> 00:05:28,040
-Upbeat Australian advice!
-Yeah!
97
00:05:28,120 --> 00:05:32,360
Hey, who were you having that delicious
sounding sex with last night?
98
00:05:32,520 --> 00:05:33,960
My vote's on the fourth-floor yoga bunny.
99
00:05:34,120 --> 00:05:38,040
Uh, I wasn't having sex.
I was... Crying.
100
00:05:38,200 --> 00:05:40,680
Weren't you hanging late
with Lulu last night?
101
00:05:40,840 --> 00:05:43,280
-Lulu?
-Sure. Yeah, me and Lulu, sure.
102
00:05:43,440 --> 00:05:44,800
I'd rather slam my dick in a door!
103
00:05:44,880 --> 00:05:47,280
Oh, my God! It was totally Lulu!
104
00:05:47,360 --> 00:05:48,280
-Was it?
-No.
105
00:05:48,680 --> 00:05:50,360
[Will] It was so totally Lulu.
106
00:05:51,040 --> 00:05:52,400
-Was it?
-Guys, leave him alone.
107
00:05:52,480 --> 00:05:54,280
Yeah, can we please just leave him
and Lulu alone?
108
00:05:54,360 --> 00:05:56,280
It wasn't Lulu. I was crying.
109
00:05:56,360 --> 00:05:58,880
Yeah, right into Lulu's vagina!
110
00:05:59,400 --> 00:06:00,360
[Will laughing]
111
00:06:00,760 --> 00:06:02,200
Ah!
112
00:06:02,280 --> 00:06:05,360
Hey, guys, I just wanted to say,
I've found a new pad.
113
00:06:05,520 --> 00:06:06,840
Oh, you got your period?
114
00:06:06,920 --> 00:06:08,480
[whispers] Love your naughty
sense of humor.
115
00:06:08,560 --> 00:06:12,080
-No, I've got a flat, in Angel.
-What? Why didn't you say?
116
00:06:12,240 --> 00:06:13,880
-Congrats, man.
-Thank you. I wanted to...
117
00:06:13,960 --> 00:06:16,120
-I wanted to ask...
-Hey, mate, will you let Kate know
118
00:06:16,200 --> 00:06:17,440
we're both in on the new building?
119
00:06:17,600 --> 00:06:20,320
I wanted to ask Fred if he'd like to
move in with me.
120
00:06:21,480 --> 00:06:22,600
Oh!
121
00:06:23,280 --> 00:06:25,440
Oh. Wow!
122
00:06:25,520 --> 00:06:27,760
It's got skirting boards, it's got
an oven, it's got a bidet.
123
00:06:27,840 --> 00:06:29,080
It's got everything.
124
00:06:29,240 --> 00:06:31,760
And it's all yours.
It's ours, if you want it.
125
00:06:31,920 --> 00:06:33,400
[whispers] What do you say?
126
00:06:33,480 --> 00:06:35,240
Oh, boy... Um...
127
00:06:35,400 --> 00:06:36,320
Phew...
128
00:06:38,480 --> 00:06:39,720
Can I think about it?
129
00:06:40,760 --> 00:06:42,080
Sure can.
130
00:06:42,880 --> 00:06:44,040
Congrats, mate.
131
00:06:44,840 --> 00:06:45,840
[chuckles]
132
00:06:50,400 --> 00:06:51,760
[phone ringing]
133
00:06:55,520 --> 00:06:56,800
Lulu?
134
00:06:56,960 --> 00:06:58,160
Lulu!
135
00:06:58,440 --> 00:06:59,400
Hm?
136
00:06:59,480 --> 00:07:01,600
Hi! Did anything come for me this morning?
137
00:07:02,480 --> 00:07:03,600
No.
138
00:07:04,760 --> 00:07:05,800
Who's that for?
139
00:07:08,080 --> 00:07:09,240
Kate.
140
00:07:14,840 --> 00:07:17,800
Yay! [giggles] Perfect!
141
00:07:17,880 --> 00:07:21,320
I love it. By the way, if you feel ill,
take the afternoon off.
142
00:07:21,480 --> 00:07:24,880
-Thanks.
-Are those pajamas?
143
00:07:24,960 --> 00:07:25,960
How dare you?
144
00:07:29,160 --> 00:07:31,440
I mean, Samaritans, my arse.
I bet he's out there
145
00:07:31,520 --> 00:07:32,800
just spanking old grandpas.
146
00:07:32,880 --> 00:07:35,560
There is nothing about him
being a Samaritan online.
147
00:07:35,640 --> 00:07:37,880
You could call them.
See if you get him.
148
00:07:40,200 --> 00:07:41,280
Colin!
149
00:07:41,360 --> 00:07:43,880
0207-946-0423.
150
00:07:43,960 --> 00:07:45,360
-They pick up really quickly.
-[phone beeping]
151
00:07:48,240 --> 00:07:50,680
-[chuckles]
-[line ringing]
152
00:07:50,760 --> 00:07:53,240
[woman] Good afternoon. Samaritans.
How can I help you today?
153
00:07:53,320 --> 00:07:55,600
Oh. Oh. Oh, no,
you can take me out.
154
00:07:55,680 --> 00:07:57,400
Charity Chops, that's what you can do.
155
00:07:57,480 --> 00:08:00,000
-[whispers] Don't disrespect them.
-[woman] Hello? Anyone there?
156
00:08:00,080 --> 00:08:01,120
-Hello?
-[keypad beeps]
157
00:08:01,200 --> 00:08:02,360
[line rings]
158
00:08:02,440 --> 00:08:03,840
-[man] Good afternoon. Samari...
-[line disconnects]
159
00:08:04,200 --> 00:08:07,520
-Hm.
-[line rings]
160
00:08:07,600 --> 00:08:09,680
[Will] G'day. You're through
to the Samaritans.
161
00:08:09,760 --> 00:08:11,640
-[whispers] Yes.
-I'm guessing this means
162
00:08:11,720 --> 00:08:14,200
you got lost along the way. Am I right?
163
00:08:14,280 --> 00:08:15,480
[whispers] He's real.
164
00:08:15,560 --> 00:08:17,040
[whispers] Speak to him.
165
00:08:17,120 --> 00:08:18,120
[Will] Hello?
166
00:08:21,160 --> 00:08:23,520
[high-pitched voice]
Hi, my name is Stephen.
167
00:08:23,600 --> 00:08:26,440
Hi, Stephen. I'm Will.
You doing OK, buddy?
168
00:08:26,680 --> 00:08:27,760
[Stephen] Not really.
169
00:08:27,880 --> 00:08:29,960
-I've got a pain in my arsehole.
-[muffled giggles]
170
00:08:30,320 --> 00:08:33,080
OK. I can't actually give you any
medical advice, I'm sorry.
171
00:08:33,160 --> 00:08:34,720
I've just done a poo in my hand
172
00:08:34,840 --> 00:08:36,800
and I'm about to go in for a meeting.
173
00:08:37,640 --> 00:08:39,480
[chuckles]
174
00:08:39,560 --> 00:08:41,320
You're a bit of joker, eh?
175
00:08:41,480 --> 00:08:44,400
All right, you got me hands down. [laughs]
176
00:08:44,480 --> 00:08:47,640
Hey, I don't mean to pry, Stephen,
177
00:08:47,720 --> 00:08:50,160
but what happens
when the laughter stops, mate?
178
00:09:03,050 --> 00:09:04,410
[Anthony] How can she pretend to love me?
179
00:09:04,580 --> 00:09:05,940
She was topless.
180
00:09:06,020 --> 00:09:08,460
Everyone says things they don't mean
when they're topless.
181
00:09:08,530 --> 00:09:10,500
Did you get totally smashed on your own
last night?
182
00:09:10,580 --> 00:09:12,380
-Shh.
-[door bell jingles]
183
00:09:12,460 --> 00:09:15,740
-[groans] I feel horrible.
-Oh, shit. It's Kate.
184
00:09:15,900 --> 00:09:17,340
She's got a balloon. What does that mean?
185
00:09:17,420 --> 00:09:19,220
God. Protect that with your life.
186
00:09:25,100 --> 00:09:28,380
Hi! Wow, look at that!
187
00:09:28,540 --> 00:09:30,140
I-love-you balloon.
188
00:09:30,220 --> 00:09:31,220
Yes.
189
00:09:33,700 --> 00:09:34,500
You OK?
190
00:09:34,620 --> 00:09:36,380
So I've been looking at properties
in Zone Five,
191
00:09:36,540 --> 00:09:39,460
and I've come across an old primary school
building in Croydon.
192
00:09:39,540 --> 00:09:40,900
-Kate.
-Are you busy?
193
00:09:40,980 --> 00:09:43,100
-Shall I come back later?
-No. I think we should talk now.
194
00:09:46,260 --> 00:09:48,700
[sniffs] Oh, wow.
195
00:09:48,780 --> 00:09:49,780
[gags]
196
00:09:53,660 --> 00:09:54,980
My God.
197
00:09:55,740 --> 00:09:57,060
[clattering]
198
00:09:57,140 --> 00:09:58,660
[whimpering]
199
00:10:07,060 --> 00:10:09,940
She wants to try some.
And then we're going to talk.
200
00:10:13,060 --> 00:10:14,220
Oh.
201
00:10:16,540 --> 00:10:17,780
Good luck!
202
00:10:26,900 --> 00:10:28,340
-Mmm.
-Mm?
203
00:10:29,500 --> 00:10:30,900
Did you put alcohol in this?
204
00:10:31,940 --> 00:10:33,860
Did you love your father?
205
00:10:34,540 --> 00:10:36,820
[in high-pitched voice]
My family were never close.
206
00:10:36,900 --> 00:10:38,940
[whispers] Ooh! He's very good.
207
00:10:39,020 --> 00:10:40,780
Hey, listen, don't underestimate
the importance of having
208
00:10:40,860 --> 00:10:42,660
a strong male role model in your life.
209
00:10:42,940 --> 00:10:43,740
OK.
210
00:10:44,300 --> 00:10:46,700
Do you know any inspirational older
men you could lean on?
211
00:10:55,700 --> 00:10:58,660
Please, Kate, talk to me.
212
00:10:58,740 --> 00:11:04,420
I don't want to live
together like this any more.
213
00:11:05,220 --> 00:11:06,460
Fuck, Kate.
214
00:11:08,220 --> 00:11:10,500
I don't want to be a guardian any more.
215
00:11:11,300 --> 00:11:12,540
I want a flat.
216
00:11:12,700 --> 00:11:17,260
With fresh fruit and normal windows and...
217
00:11:18,300 --> 00:11:19,860
No Lulu.
218
00:11:19,940 --> 00:11:21,060
Lulu? What?
219
00:11:21,180 --> 00:11:26,140
She wears quirky clothes and she
is in love with you and it's exhausting.
220
00:11:27,540 --> 00:11:28,660
[retches]
221
00:11:29,860 --> 00:11:31,700
[stammers]
She's not in love with me.
222
00:11:31,860 --> 00:11:33,980
-Kate, last night, you said...
-I didn't say anything, OK?
223
00:11:34,060 --> 00:11:35,980
I'm just never going to drink
and paint ever again.
224
00:11:36,940 --> 00:11:39,060
Can I start looking for flats?
225
00:11:39,220 --> 00:11:40,180
Yes.
226
00:11:41,620 --> 00:11:42,820
Where will Lulu go?
227
00:11:42,980 --> 00:11:45,900
-I don't care about Lulu.
-[laughing]
228
00:11:46,780 --> 00:11:47,980
Good.
229
00:11:50,620 --> 00:11:52,460
He sounds like a nightmare.
230
00:11:52,540 --> 00:11:55,460
He's just always here
being relentlessly cheery.
231
00:11:55,540 --> 00:11:56,940
And he's stolen my friend.
232
00:11:57,020 --> 00:12:00,700
Wait... Oh, God, I sound like a child!
233
00:12:00,780 --> 00:12:02,980
[Will] No, you don't, Stephen.
You really don't.
234
00:12:03,580 --> 00:12:05,380
But, hey,
235
00:12:05,460 --> 00:12:07,220
I'm going ask you something now.
236
00:12:07,380 --> 00:12:08,700
Are you ready?
237
00:12:09,020 --> 00:12:09,820
Yeah.
238
00:12:09,900 --> 00:12:13,100
Are you honest with everyone
about how you feel about them?
239
00:12:15,260 --> 00:12:16,060
No.
240
00:12:16,780 --> 00:12:18,060
[Will] Anyone in particular?
241
00:12:20,500 --> 00:12:21,300
Yes.
242
00:12:21,700 --> 00:12:25,420
Well, I think it's time you told them
how you feel, Stevo.
243
00:12:25,500 --> 00:12:26,300
[phone beeps]
244
00:12:28,740 --> 00:12:29,540
He's a knob.
245
00:12:33,700 --> 00:12:37,420
So, voila, Colin, I quit my job today.
Let's go.
246
00:12:37,700 --> 00:12:39,460
We can stay with my friend
Louis in Poland.
247
00:12:39,740 --> 00:12:42,060
He is an erotic magician.
He would love you.
248
00:12:44,500 --> 00:12:45,380
Are you having a stroke?
249
00:12:48,860 --> 00:12:49,860
Who is this?
250
00:12:51,980 --> 00:12:56,100
I'm beginning to feel like
I'm one of a long line of Colins.
251
00:12:57,740 --> 00:12:58,860
Am I?
252
00:12:59,500 --> 00:13:00,300
So what if you are?
253
00:13:01,660 --> 00:13:02,900
How many of us are there?
254
00:13:03,340 --> 00:13:04,900
-It doesn't matter.
-It does.
255
00:13:06,260 --> 00:13:10,020
You can't deny the resemblance
is unnerving.
256
00:13:10,460 --> 00:13:11,820
What is this? Huh?
257
00:13:11,900 --> 00:13:14,900
You stand in my room, you lie in my bed,
258
00:13:15,140 --> 00:13:19,260
you dance like a naked angel in my dreams
but you won't let me in.
259
00:13:19,340 --> 00:13:22,900
-I shouldn't have brought it up.
-Ah! You don't like it? Huh?
260
00:13:23,060 --> 00:13:23,980
C'est ca?
261
00:13:25,820 --> 00:13:26,780
[sighs]
262
00:13:26,980 --> 00:13:29,060
Do you know how hard it is for me
to sleep next to you
263
00:13:29,140 --> 00:13:30,380
and not touch your body?
264
00:13:30,980 --> 00:13:35,540
Not hold you? Not kiss you.
Not poke your little cheeks?
265
00:13:38,300 --> 00:13:39,500
[scoffs]
266
00:13:39,580 --> 00:13:42,300
D'accord. Go.
267
00:13:42,460 --> 00:13:45,980
Go back to your wife,
her lover, your misery.
268
00:13:46,140 --> 00:13:48,580
I'm not going to live
this torture any more. You go!
269
00:13:48,740 --> 00:13:49,660
No!
270
00:13:52,460 --> 00:13:57,260
Tonight. 6:30. I will prepare and
I will come to you.
271
00:13:59,740 --> 00:14:00,740
D'accord.
272
00:14:09,980 --> 00:14:11,940
Hey, get an erection
and bring it to my room.
273
00:14:12,020 --> 00:14:14,780
No, honey, it doesn't
work like that. He's sleeping.
274
00:14:15,420 --> 00:14:16,580
You already have a semi.
275
00:14:16,660 --> 00:14:18,020
Damn. Shit. No. No. No.
276
00:14:18,100 --> 00:14:20,100
'Cause if Anthony finds out about this...
277
00:14:20,180 --> 00:14:22,100
Lu! There you are... [panting]
278
00:14:22,300 --> 00:14:23,180
Find out about what?
279
00:14:23,820 --> 00:14:25,420
Finds out that...
280
00:14:25,820 --> 00:14:26,620
Sam's got...
281
00:14:27,140 --> 00:14:28,580
-What?
-A semi.
282
00:14:28,820 --> 00:14:31,020
-OK.
-No! Find out Kate's...
283
00:14:31,140 --> 00:14:32,540
-What?
-Pregnant.
284
00:14:33,420 --> 00:14:34,220
[chuckles] What?
285
00:14:35,860 --> 00:14:38,340
-Yeah. Really...
-Really pregnant.
286
00:14:40,660 --> 00:14:42,100
She told me not to tell you.
287
00:14:56,980 --> 00:14:57,980
What...
288
00:15:07,260 --> 00:15:08,500
-Uh, Kate, quick word.
-Bubbles?
289
00:15:08,580 --> 00:15:09,620
What is the occasion?
290
00:15:09,700 --> 00:15:11,100
Oh, I'd rather wait
until Anthony gets back.
291
00:15:11,180 --> 00:15:11,980
OK, I need to...
292
00:15:12,060 --> 00:15:13,860
There's an old people's home
in Zone Three.
293
00:15:13,940 --> 00:15:15,020
I have requested a viewing for you.
294
00:15:15,100 --> 00:15:16,580
-But I've done a bad...
-Not now, Sam.
295
00:15:16,660 --> 00:15:18,140
Um. Sam, can we talk for a second?
296
00:15:18,220 --> 00:15:20,780
-Hi, team.
-Hey, how was Samaritans?
297
00:15:20,860 --> 00:15:23,540
Really interesting day, actually.
298
00:15:23,620 --> 00:15:24,660
[Sam] Get many callers?
299
00:15:24,740 --> 00:15:27,100
Uh, a little girl who's getting bullied,
300
00:15:27,180 --> 00:15:28,820
a hyperactive dinner lady,
301
00:15:28,980 --> 00:15:31,300
and frustrated homosexual.
302
00:15:31,460 --> 00:15:32,340
[whispers] Tragic, actually.
303
00:15:32,500 --> 00:15:35,860
Really simple guy, just desperate to be
much more complicated than he actually is.
304
00:15:36,060 --> 00:15:38,100
He's got a big hard on for his best friend
305
00:15:38,260 --> 00:15:40,860
and is jealous of the new
boyfriend, yada, yada, yada.
306
00:15:41,020 --> 00:15:45,380
Anyway, I think we really got
somewhere with him.
307
00:15:45,460 --> 00:15:52,420
I am going to go hit the el bano and then
I want your final answer, OK?
308
00:15:52,500 --> 00:15:55,980
-Deal. Don't be long.
-OK.
309
00:15:56,140 --> 00:15:58,820
-Are you going to move in with him?
-I think so, yeah.
310
00:15:58,900 --> 00:16:00,180
Me and Anthony, too.
311
00:16:00,260 --> 00:16:01,860
-Yay!
-Yay!
312
00:16:01,940 --> 00:16:03,380
[both laugh]
313
00:16:04,620 --> 00:16:05,820
[feebly] Yay!
314
00:16:08,340 --> 00:16:11,540
Jesus, there you are!
Listen. Kate isn't...
315
00:16:11,620 --> 00:16:12,900
-Is she back?
-Yes, but she's not...
316
00:16:12,980 --> 00:16:15,620
I knew something freaky
was going on. I knew it.
317
00:16:15,700 --> 00:16:17,820
I am more intuitive than
I give myself credit for.
318
00:16:17,980 --> 00:16:19,380
No, no, you're really not.
319
00:16:19,460 --> 00:16:23,980
I'm fine. I'm going to deal
with this really well.
320
00:16:24,060 --> 00:16:26,140
Really, really well.
321
00:16:26,220 --> 00:16:29,300
No, you're not!
She's not even... Oh, dear!
322
00:16:29,460 --> 00:16:33,300
♪ I was sailing down
The River Jordan ♪
323
00:16:33,380 --> 00:16:34,660
[door slams]
324
00:16:35,860 --> 00:16:36,860
G'day?
325
00:16:38,260 --> 00:16:40,140
[footsteps]
326
00:16:42,180 --> 00:16:43,580
G'day?
327
00:16:43,660 --> 00:16:45,100
[Sam] [in falsetto voice]
Why do you think I'm gay?
328
00:16:46,980 --> 00:16:48,700
You think you're so clever.
329
00:16:50,700 --> 00:16:52,220
I'm here to help you.
330
00:16:54,260 --> 00:16:55,380
I want to help.
331
00:16:55,540 --> 00:16:57,540
Answer my question or I'm coming in.
332
00:17:07,460 --> 00:17:10,500
I think you're gay because you obsess
about the men in your life.
333
00:17:10,580 --> 00:17:14,740
What, just because I care
about my friends, it makes me a bender?
334
00:17:14,900 --> 00:17:18,100
You need to update your counsel, brother.
Give me a better reason.
335
00:17:18,460 --> 00:17:20,660
[screams]
336
00:17:20,740 --> 00:17:23,940
Because you're obsessed
with me. You think about me.
337
00:17:24,180 --> 00:17:25,500
You flash your body at me.
338
00:17:25,580 --> 00:17:27,940
You bitch about me and then to top it off,
339
00:17:28,020 --> 00:17:30,090
you put on a stupid voice
and you call my work
340
00:17:30,180 --> 00:17:34,180
and waste the time of a poor little dinner
lady who really needed help.
341
00:17:34,380 --> 00:17:35,380
Maybe I need help.
342
00:17:36,380 --> 00:17:38,420
-You need a boyfriend.
-Do you think?
343
00:17:38,940 --> 00:17:42,060
Yeah, I do. I really do.
344
00:17:42,140 --> 00:17:43,570
I think you need to have sex with a man.
345
00:17:43,740 --> 00:17:44,900
Fuck you.
346
00:17:45,060 --> 00:17:46,500
[chuckles]
347
00:17:46,570 --> 00:17:49,330
Hey, um... I get it.
348
00:17:50,060 --> 00:17:52,700
I'm upbeat and Australian
and a lot of fun.
349
00:17:53,260 --> 00:17:56,300
But I'm in love with your boy Fred.
I'm fucking crazy about him.
350
00:17:56,380 --> 00:17:59,620
And either you need to back off,
or you need to share him
351
00:17:59,780 --> 00:18:01,500
because I'm not going anywhere
352
00:18:02,020 --> 00:18:04,340
and you and I will just end up fighting
353
00:18:04,420 --> 00:18:06,140
till the sun takes his little hat off.
354
00:18:08,820 --> 00:18:11,260
It'll be so much better for both of us
355
00:18:11,580 --> 00:18:14,060
if you and I just get on.
356
00:18:38,660 --> 00:18:40,060
[screaming]
357
00:18:40,140 --> 00:18:42,540
I told you he wasn't to be trusted!
I told you...
358
00:18:42,620 --> 00:18:44,180
Pack your little bag and don't listen to
a word he says!
359
00:18:44,420 --> 00:18:46,460
Don't interrupt me! You have not got
a dick to stand on!
360
00:18:46,540 --> 00:18:49,300
-Guys, guys!
-Please don't let him speak.
361
00:18:49,580 --> 00:18:51,340
Will someone tell me what happened?
362
00:18:51,420 --> 00:18:53,220
We were in the shower room...
Do not interrupt me!
363
00:18:53,380 --> 00:18:55,780
-I was asking this douche about his day.
-Nice guy.
364
00:18:55,860 --> 00:18:59,140
Then he just opened my shower door,
leaned in all monkey chest
365
00:18:59,260 --> 00:19:01,740
and then he kissed me with his mouth!
366
00:19:01,820 --> 00:19:05,580
Fred. Sam pranked me today at work.
He called me...
367
00:19:05,660 --> 00:19:07,340
-Did you kiss him with your mouth?
-No.
368
00:19:07,420 --> 00:19:08,220
-Liar!
-Sam,
369
00:19:08,300 --> 00:19:09,340
I don't know what
you're trying to do here.
370
00:19:09,420 --> 00:19:10,660
[Kate] Did you kiss at all?
371
00:19:13,020 --> 00:19:13,820
Will?
372
00:19:16,060 --> 00:19:17,220
He... He kissed me.
373
00:19:17,780 --> 00:19:20,540
-Oh, boy.
-[waling] Oh, my God.
374
00:19:20,620 --> 00:19:23,260
-Fred. I don't know why...
-OK. I think um...
375
00:19:23,340 --> 00:19:24,900
-Kate.
-Not now, Anthony.
376
00:19:24,980 --> 00:19:26,380
There is some serious shit going down here
377
00:19:26,460 --> 00:19:28,460
-and I'm just delighted it's not about us.
-You're pregnant!
378
00:19:28,540 --> 00:19:30,340
-Oh, Jesus.
-[Kate] What?
379
00:19:30,500 --> 00:19:31,460
[Anthony] Why didn't you tell me?
380
00:19:31,620 --> 00:19:33,300
Because I am not pregnant.
381
00:19:33,460 --> 00:19:34,820
Yeah, guys...
382
00:19:34,980 --> 00:19:36,220
Not pregnant? Really?
383
00:19:36,460 --> 00:19:37,900
No! I hope not!
384
00:19:38,060 --> 00:19:41,220
Oh, thank God! Thank God!
385
00:19:41,300 --> 00:19:43,940
-Thank God!
-All right! Don't have a party about it.
386
00:19:44,020 --> 00:19:47,860
Sorry. Thank God.
I just... Sam, what the hell?
387
00:19:47,940 --> 00:19:50,980
OK, anyone else got anything
they would like to announce to the room
388
00:19:51,060 --> 00:19:52,780
before I start self-harming?
389
00:19:54,020 --> 00:19:56,980
OK, in that case. Will, I think we...
390
00:19:57,060 --> 00:19:58,700
Sam's fucking Lulu!
391
00:19:58,780 --> 00:20:00,700
-[all gasp]
-What?
392
00:20:00,780 --> 00:20:04,420
Mate, I am so sorry.
She was really pushy.
393
00:20:04,500 --> 00:20:08,020
-[stutters] Grey area mate, serious.
-What the fuck? You promised!
394
00:20:08,260 --> 00:20:10,940
-Promised what?
-You can't stop two sexy people...
395
00:20:11,100 --> 00:20:12,740
Yeah, no, I know. I know. I know.
396
00:20:14,140 --> 00:20:15,500
Fuck's sake, man!
397
00:20:16,660 --> 00:20:19,420
-[scoffs] I just...
-[Sam] What?
398
00:20:19,580 --> 00:20:21,700
What, you just wanted them
all for yourself?
399
00:20:25,740 --> 00:20:26,700
-[screams]
-Red zone!
400
00:20:26,860 --> 00:20:29,060
Ow! What the fuck do you care?
401
00:20:29,220 --> 00:20:31,540
-She's not your girlfriend.
-I told you not to do that.
402
00:20:31,700 --> 00:20:33,460
Oh, I'm sorry I broke your rules!
403
00:20:34,340 --> 00:20:36,420
Seems like you deal in other
people's property
404
00:20:36,500 --> 00:20:38,300
in life as well as work, Sam.
405
00:20:40,660 --> 00:20:41,660
Are you punning?
406
00:20:42,020 --> 00:20:44,300
-I'm just saying... [grunts]
-Ow!
407
00:20:46,500 --> 00:20:48,700
Stop fucking everyone, you prick!
408
00:20:48,780 --> 00:20:50,660
[all grunting]
409
00:20:50,740 --> 00:20:52,540
Argh! I don't know who to hit!
410
00:20:52,620 --> 00:20:54,180
[all grunting]
411
00:20:54,340 --> 00:20:55,980
You can't help yourself, can you?
412
00:20:56,060 --> 00:20:58,780
Life is a buffet, Anthony.
I taught you that!
413
00:20:59,860 --> 00:21:01,380
I think I'm done here.
414
00:21:01,460 --> 00:21:03,660
Just admit you're gay, mate!
415
00:21:03,740 --> 00:21:06,340
Just admit you're a dick! Hospital vote.
416
00:21:06,580 --> 00:21:08,940
Will should get the fuck out
for kissing me!
417
00:21:10,740 --> 00:21:13,980
-[Lulu] What?
-Ha! You see that!
418
00:21:14,260 --> 00:21:17,940
Everybody loves me.
Everyone wants me around.
419
00:21:18,020 --> 00:21:22,060
I am fantastic. I always win. Always.
420
00:21:22,140 --> 00:21:25,220
I see what I want and I go
and I bloody well get it.
421
00:21:25,460 --> 00:21:28,500
And I want little Fred to be my wife
422
00:21:28,660 --> 00:21:31,980
and if that means spending
time in this skanky hospital
423
00:21:32,060 --> 00:21:37,300
surrounded by a bunch of insane
and unattractive urban gyppos,
424
00:21:37,380 --> 00:21:41,020
so be it, but I will be disinfecting
myself the minute
425
00:21:41,140 --> 00:21:44,140
I walk out of here
because you all disgust me.
426
00:21:45,940 --> 00:21:46,940
Come, little Fred.
427
00:22:03,660 --> 00:22:06,220
I think you need to leave
the skanky hospital, Will.
428
00:22:10,180 --> 00:22:14,140
You will never meet anyone like me
ever again.
429
00:22:15,900 --> 00:22:17,420
I'm fantastic.
430
00:22:21,380 --> 00:22:22,420
[door slams]
431
00:22:26,740 --> 00:22:29,180
See, I told you
he couldn't be trusted, mate.
432
00:22:33,820 --> 00:22:35,100
Yeah, you nailed it.
433
00:22:41,140 --> 00:22:43,180
-Mate, I need to find...
-I need to find Kate.
434
00:22:57,420 --> 00:22:58,660
[knock on door]
435
00:23:10,900 --> 00:23:11,700
Ready?
436
00:23:12,580 --> 00:23:13,580
Oui.
437
00:23:23,980 --> 00:23:26,340
Just tell me one thing.
438
00:23:26,420 --> 00:23:27,420
Anything.
439
00:23:28,500 --> 00:23:30,300
Who's the man in the picture?
440
00:23:31,180 --> 00:23:32,900
Oh! It's my father.
29537
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