All language subtitles for Rake - 05x04 - Gold and Greene v Red.W4F.English.C.updated.Addic7ed.com

Oh, shit. Sorry, mate.

I was wondering if you would like
to come to Canberra some time.

I'm try to set up a steering committee.

We're meant to be living in your
fabulous harbour view apartment

on your multimillion-dollar salary
but, no,

instead you decide to lodge
another appeal against your brother

and are living in this dump.

My father promised me that painting.

Piece of shit painting,
with three cows eating grass.

So with Missy, you brought her to my
house for a couple of days and that

was almost two years ago.

So you know what,
I think it is your turn.

She has been lying to all of us
to create a persona.

She is a 100% fraud.

Senator Greene,
you'll be hearing from my lawyers

as early as tomorrow morning

because no-one calls me a bald-faced
liar and doesn't pay for it.

Synced & corrected by -robtor-
www.addic7ed.com

At 1530 hours Eastern Standard Time,

I informed the Governor General that
following a successful leadership

challenge in the party room,

I have been elected the leader

of the Federal
Parliamentary Liberal Party.

His Excellency then commissioned me
to form a government.

Tomorrow the sun will rise on Anzac Day

as we honour those who gave so much

so that we might have
the freedoms that we enjoy.

I'm only too cognisant
of the significance

and grave responsibility
bestowed upon me.

Prime Minister,
is there blood on your hands?

Do you have the backing
of the whole party?

I acknowledge the enormous
contribution made by my predecessor,

Angela Sway in her long
28 weeks in office.

Let me assure you

there is no divisional rancour
within my government.

We are a broad church

but united in the great dream
of what this country can become.

Aussie! Aussie! Aussie!

The whole party room sings a song
of cohesion and positivity

about the great tasks that lie ahead.

Oh, you b...

You know you are due in Senate,
don't you?

There's a special sitting.

And an English couple rang
wanting your address.

Oh, my God! My new buzz
state people, is that today?

You do know that it is probably
illegal and it could be seen as you

profiting personally
from serving the Commonwealth.

It's a murky area of law.

They're English, Cleaver, they're
not going to survive your squalor.

Fuck.

- Senator Cleaver Greene?
- Yes. Mr Clifford?

Where is Mrs Clifford? No luggage?
That is fine. Come in.

I am just putting the finishing
touches on your roof.

- Good morning. We are the Cliffords.
- Good morning.

Oh, you're the Cliffords?

I had understood that
there were only two of you.

There are.

Two.

Alright. OK. I'm sorry.

Come on in, Cliffords. Come in.

Make yourselves at home.

You're not a Clifford.

You are Senator Cleaver Greene?

Yes, sadly yes.

Well, then...

Consider yourself served.

Are you kidding me?

A summons? Who is it? Let me guess.

- Penelope...
- Penelope Evans.

Yes, yes, here we go.

Defamation.

Traduced and lowered her standing.
Are you kidding me?

What special class of moron does that?

Huh?

Accused the plaintiff of deceit and
dishonesty in a malicious attempt

to damage her politically.

Can you believe this shit?

Oh, great. Excuse me, that will be
my firing squad, Cliffords.

Oh! Have I woken up in a French vase?

Reporting for duty, boss.

I am so ready for this.

Your press secretary, wow!

I guess it's not wow
but it is an opportunity.

I didn't study journalism
but Wendy said not to be discouraged

because I'm a good writer
with a brain and I really need this.

So, thanks.

So, Wendy said all that, did she?

Good.

I am pretty good at making stuff up.

So I should be fine.

- Good.
- Bathroom?

- Uh... where should we...?
- You go upstairs.

There, take my room.

I will sleep on the sofa.

- Great. She really needs a nap, so...
- Yes.

A couple of hours, though.

- See you at the house.
- Yes.

Give us a call before you come in.

I have a few admin issues to iron out.

Have you got a plunger?
Your sink is clogged with hair.

I followed up my degree at the
Harvard School of journalism

with four years at Reuters
on their international desk

and then the Guardian.

You are horribly overqualified
for a Press Secretary.

Do you know anything about the man
that you would be working for?

- Senator Greene?
- I know he is a maverick.

Maverick is a word.

He was strong on farmers' rights.

- On the environment.
- Strong is also a strong word.

- OK, I need the job.
- Mm-hm.

I have two kids, we moved here,
my husband is a lobbyist.

Newspapers now,

they're putting off more people
than they can sell issues.

He is a bit of a nut job, isn't he?

Yes. That is the correct
choice of words, yes.

Roland fucking Webster, eh?

Mate, I thought
I had your unequivocal support.

Roland's purely a stopgap.

Six months to keep the moderates happy.

Then we make our move.

Does he know the real story
with the terrorist attack?

No.

Why burden him with the details?
He is just the PM.

Let him rabbit on about security,
that always plays well.

We just need to get this
Noyce business through the Senate.

You know that Penny Evans has got
her knickers in a knot over it,

don't you?

Look at the little pig.

We can't afford getting sued
in your present circumstances.

Mate, I can't afford fucking lunch.

Alright? The banks won't budge.

I'm living out of your piggybank.

And now this lunatic is suing me.

I can continue to act
as this banking facility for you

but obviously we must do this covertly.

In time
I will adhere to our arrangements.

I do this because I regard you
as my friend and not just my client.

Yeah, likewise.

- A close friend.
- Yeah.

And one day maybe you will be
in a position as a friend...

...to do me a favour.

Oh. Yes. Of course.

Thanks, mate.

This government, with its hatred
of the ordinary Australian,

is basically prepared to let one of
Australia's most loved icons,

the Oz Ripple,

slip through our hands
and into the all too willing grasp

of the Chinese people.

Senator, put your prop down!

Unless us, as Australians,
stop the sale of Noyce Industries

to the Chinese,

this ice-cream
that has been so much a part

of the lives of ordinary Australians

will slip through Noyce Industries' hands

and into the ever clasping, ever grasping

clutches of a communist regime.

Bit by bit,

Australia is being handed over
to any Chin or Chan with money.

Senator, you've been warned.

And look what they are proposing to do

with the centre of our beloved ice-cream.

Senator, you have been warned!

Gone will be the green and gold
of my childhood,

replaced with a giant red blob.

A giant red communist blob.

Well, as leader of the Penny Evans
party, I say to you,

Australia will never have a red
heart as long as there is breath...

...breath in my body.

Just look at her application.
This woman is fantastic, Cleaver.

Yes. Yes.

She seems to have wasted a lot of
time in New York, London, Syria,

Iraq, blah, blah.

I mean, I am after somebody
with a bit more of a domestic focus.

She is a Walkley
award-winning journalist, Cleaver.

They give them away
in cornflakes packets.

Just leave it with me. I am onto it.
I am brewing something up.

Have you told Frank he's fired yet?

Not as such. He is a sensitive soul.

He is a lump of basalt, Cleaver.

He may have taken a few too many
knocks to his head

in his sporting career.

Well, a few more might have been good.

- You sack him.
- I'm going to.

- When?
- Today.

- When today?
- When he sobers up.

And what are you going to do about
this defamation case?

- Oh-ho...
- Cleaver.

This could kill your career
and I need this job.

- So...
- I know, I know.

Oh, my God.

So I said to her,
this was on the Tuesday...

On the Tuesday, yeah.

If Bryce and I are going to go
to the Blue Mountains

and have this weekend,

and really talk about our
relationship, honestly and frankly...

Mm-hm.

Oh, no. Correction, sorry.

I said this to her on the Wednesday.

Oh, OK, on the Wednesday, yeah.

Because on the Tuesday morning
I had breakfast with Simone.

On Tuesday morning.

And I knew full well that Natalie was
going to opt out of that breakfast,

and sure enough, come Monday night...

Oh, Monday night. Oh!

Gosh. Um...

I think we are getting into some
really interesting territory here

but I need to check on something
and I'll... OK?

Mm.

Um... So, it was Monday night.

No, actually.

In fairness to Natalie,
it was Sunday evening...

Oh, OK. ..that she rang.

Well, that makes a difference.

What is it about a green and yellow
striped something that makes it

particularly Australian?

- Green and gold.
- It's not even the colour of our flag.

It is meant to be wattle, isn't it?

Well... I mean...

It is also the colours of Ethiopia,
Mauritania, Bolivia, Burkina...

Where the fuck is Burkina Faso?

I mean, it's an ice-cream.

What is so special about an ice-cream?

Well, for me, I had some pretty
special memories of my childhood.

My dad would take me fishing
on Yamba jetty

and if I caught something he would say,

"Nic, I reckon that deserves
an Oz Ripple, don't you?"

Alright, well, a heart-warming tale.

But he never forgot that either.

When he was dying that was almost
the last thing he talked about.

OK. Genuinely moving.

But... but...

...haven't we got bigger issues to fry
in this country?

We do but that would require you to
open one of these folders and read

what is in it and actually form
an opinion on something.

Yeah, not going to happen.

3-points, ladies and gentlemen.

You know that you mentioned the Oz Ripple

in your 90-hour maiden speech?

- No, I didn't.
- Yes, you did.

- No, I didn't.
- You did.

You called it the Oz Ripper.

Oh, the Oz Ripper? Yes.

You asked me to gather some Aussie icons

so you could sound like
a man of the people

and I suggested the Oz Ripple.

It was only one that had not been
flogged off that I knew of.

Well, we don't make anything here.

We are a proud nation of baristas
and hairdressers.

Penny Evans is getting hit after hit
about it on social media.

About the Oz Ripper? Ripple.

- Ripple. Yes.
- Ripple. Oz Ripple.

Positive or negative?

A quarter of a million positives.

- You're kidding me.
- No.

- Fucking Oz Ripper. Ripple.
- Ripple.

- Holy shit.
- Ripple.

My old man was not much of a talker.

Our special time
was the hours we'd spend together

fishing off the old Yamba jetty.

Just him and me, father and son.

A battered old fishing cap,
pulled down over his balding pate.

Pinkies inking on the old schnozz.

How I relish those days.

Days I now share with my own son.

And when he was a little fella

and he would reel in
the occasional flatty...

...sand whiting,

and I would turn to him
and I would say, "Gee, son...

"I reckon that one is worth
an Oz Ripple."

And we would bite into that
choc-coated map of this nation.

It was the last thing I shared
with my old man before he died.

For me, this is a deeply personal
crusade.

There are others who have jumped on
the bandwagon but, for me,

it is personal.

What are we going to leave our
children or our children's children

or our children's children's children,

if not this?

Hear, hear.

Don't you Yamba me, you little ferret.

How dare you grandstand
on my bloody issue?

I will take you down.

I got your little writ.

You must be the only person
in human history to sue someone

who is accusing them for being more
intelligent than they actually are.

You so don't get politics.

I know how this place works
and I am going to hurt you.

You do, every time you speak
the Queen's English.

Oz Ripple is mine, lady.

I checked Hansard.

You called it the Oz Ripper.

Or perhaps you were celebrating
some Australian mass murderer.

You handpick history like grapes,
do you know that?

You take the ones you like and
spit out the bits that don't suit.

You're just a criminal dilettante,
Cleaver.

You have nothing to say about anything.

I'd respect you more
if you were a genuine old-fashioned,

tar and feather bigot.

To affect racism and not actually
believe in it yourself,

that is about as low as you can get
without being an actual virus.

Oz Ripple is mine.

It's mine.

Cal, put your mind at ease.
Nothing changes.

You are still
our number one big boy around here.

We thought you might spark better
off someone young and pretty.

I might spark better
if I'm left well alone.

We're trying to bring in a younger
audience to hear your wisdom.

Hmm. But she's too young.

And she lacks experience
and she does not have my gravitas.

We hear you.
If it does not work out, poof.

She is gone. Your call.

- That quick. Nothing changes.
- Excellent.

What the hell is that?

Strong, isn't it?

But it's my show.

100%.

The sign is just a sign.

You two are going to have a lot of fun.

The big issue, the one I really want
to get stuck into tonight

and, gee, this gets my dander up...

You need to watch that at your age, Cal.

...is all this kerfuffle
about the sale of an ice-cream.

This is the sale of a major
manufacturing company

and may cement
our economic future with China.

Sales like this won't help everyone.

Sounds like someone's superfund
might have shares in them, Cal.

Is it in your best interest
if this goes through?

My personal share portfolio has
nothing to do with this, Caitlyn.

Don't we love him, girls,
when he becomes Mr Old Grumpy Pants?

He is adorable. Like our old
favourite uncle, isn't he?

Even though he is so very wrong.

Oh, I'm not wrong.

Yeah, you are.

This ice-cream has been part
of our heritage

ever since the Noyce family began
production over 70 years ago

and built themselves

into the massive Australian concern
they are today.

This is not just about a delicious
ice-cream,

it is about who we are as a people.

As today, ANZAC Day, we celebrate
the heroes of both wars,

where young men gave their very
lives in service of our country.

What did those green and gold
stripes really mean?

And are we going to settle for a red
blob in the middle of our country?

Is that really what you want for us, Cal?

Ha!

Let us get a weather update.

OK, what the fuck just happened?

What happened to the script?

OK, that is coffee. That's cold coffee.

I didn't have time to heat it.

You have stained my shirt, crazy lady.

You've stained my memories.

That was MY personal story.

Pardon me, but if you look at
your job discretion,

you will see that you are actually
described as my researcher.

Yeah? And so therefore
anything you tell me,

I will assume to be research

and that I can use it
unless otherwise specified.

You are an arsehole.

Use that.

On the upside,
your research has really...

It was not research, Cleaver,

that was my personal story
about my late father.

Whatever the derivation,

incredible result.

Have a look for yourself. I'm running
red hot on social media right now.

Red hot!

You don't happen to have any other
stories that you can...?

OK, now is probably not the right
time to talk about that.

But have a think about it.

Is there a change of shirt in here
you could help me out with?

It's hanging out, Cleaver.
Have you sacked him yet?

The weight is in these
Dickie Dougie Suits or emu suits.

They can do the glassy thing.

Go around and pick up the glass... OK.

Just having a one-on-one
with Ryan Fefney.

Some very interesting intel
vis-a-vis a number of issues

apropos what we are dealing with.

- What are we dealing with?
- Well, exactly.

How do you want me to play
this ice-cream thing?

Frank... Look...

Nicole has raised a few concerns.

She is not up to it. Sorry to interrupt.

I have to tell you as a mate
you have got to ditch her.

It is funny you should say that
because she seems worried about you.

She doesn't see what I do.

Very few do.

See, she is worried and I am worried

that you've taken on too big a load.

You... you look exhausted.

Unseen stress goes with the job.

It's killing you and I'm not going
to live with your death on my hands.

So what... Here's an idea.

We cut back your days a bit,

reduce that incredible workload

and make sure you're in it
for the long haul.

How would you see my new role, then?

You will be the basalt
upon which my future is built.

I need you right here

at the epicentre of contemporary
Australian political thought.

This bar.

Yeah? Listening.

Talking. Doing all the vital
one-on-one stuff.

Would I still be the press officer?

No, no, no.

I'm... promoting you.

You're going to be
my director of communications.

Wow. Big responsibility!

Yes, yes. It's a big responsibility.

Just over the next little while,

whenever you see Nicole,

just give her a wide berth because
she's gonna be green with envy.

Alright? And her... her neck's
on the chopping block.

You're absolutely sure about this?

- 100%.
- Have you spoke to the auditors?

Yes.

Did you call those numbers I gave you?

- Yeah.
- Jesus.

Confirm it again. You know
what this means if we're right?

I said I'd think about taking Missy on,

not actually take her on.

I know she's fragile at present,

but I don't have a bed or anything
for her or the baby.

I need a proper press secretary.

I'm making significant headway
opposing this Oz Ripper sale.

This will put me on the map, but I
need someone with real experience,

do you know what I mean?
Working the press 24/7.

Call me the moment you get this message.

Press 4 to replay this message.

I said I'd think about taking Missy
on, not actually take her on.

OK, so your job is to generate
stories about me.

OK? It doesn't matter what,
any old bullshit, it's just noise.

OK? As long as I'm front and centre.

So at the moment I need
as much exposure as possible

about this Oz Ripper.

- Ripple.
- Ripple.

Yeah, I heard Penny Evans
talking about it.

Actually, she made a lot of sense.

- No, she doesn't. She's a mad person.
- Oh.

Yes, we hate... you hate her

and you must do everything
in your power to destroy her.

OK, fair enough.

Now, we haven't talked about
my working arrangements yet.

OK, now as I'm sure Wendy mentioned,
you would be job sharing.

Wendy thought that you'd need
some time with Winston.

Oh, that's very thoughtful of her.

Yeah. So you will be job sharing with...

...one of the most highly respected
veteran journos in the country.

And so will I be sharing an office
with him or her?

No, no, no. Well, he doesn't need
an office.

He's fieldwork, kind of guy.

So I'll be in with you and Nicole?

OK. About Nicole.

Here's the thing.

You had best keep away from Nicole
for a while

because she's in a really bad place.

She's grieving the death of her dad.

He died years ago, didn't he?

You can't quantify grief like that,
can you?

There's no...

Australian Oz Ripple...

Oh, making yourselves at home there?

Huh?

Green and gold of my childhood.

And as a little girl...

Yes?

...my folks would give me 50 cents
if I had done all my chores,

and my sister and I,

we'd run on down to the local corner
shop and I'd look up and I'd say,

"Hey, Mr O'Rourke,
two Oz Ripples please."

OK. Fact check that.

Alright? O'Rourke.

See if there even was an O'Rourke
where she grew up.

Because that's probably bullshit,
we can use it in court.

Sorry.

We make it a rule to never speak
while masticating our food.

Haven't they got more important
things to worry about

than an ice-cream?

The heart of Australia will never be red.

My parents and I would stand
together and watch the Anzac parade

and all wave our Oz Ripples
as our heroes passed by.

That ice-cream was our flag.

Hear, hear.

So Mr President, while Senator Evans
was busy waving from the sidelines,

as what you would have to imagine, a
fairly irritating 7-year-old child,

I was proudly marching in the parade
with my father and grandfather,

Artie Green.

And at march's end,

we would sit quietly
and eat a Ripper Ripple...

...in honour of their fallen comrades.

Hear, hear.

Senator Potter.

Oh, bring me my pethidine.

I don't particularly care whether
the centre was red, green or brown.

- Shame!
- SHAME!

What I am concerned about

is the manner in which Noyce Industries

is going about selling their business.

Now, I seek leave
to table several documents.

These are expense statements

that do not appear on the official
government register

and have not been cited
by the auditor general.

They belong to two government senators.

Senators Selleck and Wells
and a member of the Lower House,

the so-called Honourable Member Allkirk.

Absolutely not.

Order!

Now, it would appear if these
documents are correct,

that these three politicians
received substantial gifts

to act as intermediaries
in the proposed Noyce sale.

Slender! I defy you to repeat any
of this outside of this place!

Happily.

According to these,

these three politicians
received business class seats,

a week's all-expenses-paid holiday
at the Cowlin Resort

and $2,000 in casino chips.

There is a perfectly reasonable
explanation for all of this.

Well, we would all like to hear it.

These are baseless allegations
and although I am stepping down,

let me be clear, I am not resigning.

And I very much look forward to
clearing my name, looking forward.

And I very much look forward,
very forward to clearing my name,

looking forward...

...against the sale of the Ripple

and clearly
my instincts have been confirmed.

I said this was a dirty deal
from the start.

Clearly it is. This is how
the Chinese play, people.

How do we hose down this Harry shit?

Well, he's done the work

and due diligence expected of him
as a senator

and he has wiped the floor
with you and Penny Evans.

Three pollies down, maybe out.
Spotlight's on him.

I've got to reclaim
the moral high ground.

It's an ice-cream, Cleaver,
there is no moral high ground.

Fuckin' Harry sorry David!

Can you believe it? I mean...

I raised... This is my issue,
I raised this issue.

You didn't raise any issue, Cleaver,
or do any actual research.

You just gave the vague approximation

of a name of an ice-cream

and then you stole
a childhood memory from me.

I threw a pebble in a pond.

You know? I set the ripples in motion
and now look where we are.

Two government ministers gone,
a backbencher gone.

That's me. That's my...

That's all down to me. That's me, me, me.

I've said this before, Cleaver,

but you might be getting
to that point again

where you need a blanket and sedation.

He's not going to get away
with this shit.

Away with what shit, Cleaver?

Doing his job?

- Missy... what are you doing?
- Cleave.

I need you to organise me a press
conference for 12 o'clock today.

To say what?

To say that this sale
is not going to go ahead

because I have single-handedly saved
the Oz Ripper.

- Ripple.
- Ripple.

I know. Don't...

Don't follow me.

What?

Right. Organised a press conference
for 12 o'clock.

- You did? By yourself?
- Tick.

Well, you can't,

you've got a kids' science award
presentation at 12.

Well, cancel it.

No. You're presenting an award

to a top primary school student
at Henley Hall.

Well, that sounds shithouse. Somebody
from the Government should do that.

No, it's science,
Government won't go near it.

Anyway, Potter's got one at 12.

Oh, fucking Potter.

Oh... OK, I'll have to make mine 12:30.

No, Penny Evans has got one at 12:30.

Oh, God. OK, I'll have to make mine
one o'clock!

Fuck! I'm losing precious time here.

I'll just let you organise
that yourself, shall I?

Miss, I need you to move my press
conference to 1pm, OK?

And knock us up a speech.

A speech, just a...

Yeah, the issues. OK.

Yaakov, we have got to go, mate.

Henley Hall, please.

Very soon a time will come
when you need to make a decision.

There is about to be a coup.

What? Another... A coup in Parliament?

Amongst the drivers.

A quantum power shift

with massive implications
for this country at large.

Implications for the country at large.

OK, great, I got it. Now can we go
to Henley Hall please, buddy?

Place your faith in Yaakov Novak
at your own peril.

I trust I make myself clear?

Yeah, not particularly, mate.

I trust you want me
to take you to Henley Hall?

Yeah, yeah.

So there was another driver here.

I know.

These are complicated political times.

Senator Penny Evans claimed
that the bribes were the result

of Chinese corruption.

The opposite is true.

It appears that the bribes
have come from Australia.

Earlier today, I was informed by the
Federal Police that Desmond Noyce,

the CEO of Noyce Industries,

has been charged with bribing
senior government members.

And now for our next guest presenter,

we have Senator Cleaver Greene,

who has come all the way
from Parliament House

to present our science prize

to the most outstanding science
student in our under-12 age group.

So please welcome Senator Greene.

Thank you very much.

And congratulations
to Sherry MacGyver, you won.

Quick, quick. Good.

Well done, Sherry. Congratulations
on your science project,

comparing the output of lithium
batteries to ones powered by van...

- ...Van Damme...
- Vanadium.

Vanadium is a mineral
used in steel production and

my research was looking at different
ways of prolonging battery life,

even though lithium
has a better storage capacity.

Incredible, thank you, Sherry!

She's only 12 years old

and what a great and wonderful future
we have with kids like her. Huh?

You better run back your seat, darling.

Show Mum and Dad that award.

So thank you very much, Henley Hall,

you have been incredible,

and now I'll throw back to someone else.

Done and dusted. I'm outta here.

OK, can you push my press conference
by 15 minutes?

And is my car waiting?

She as an adviser to the UN on
climate science and she is also an

international spokesperson
for the Refugee Action Alliance.

Well, round numbers.

No, that's just a round number.

Sorry, who resigned?

OK, well, tell them
I've got new information.

No, of course I don't,
but they don't know that.

I am heartened to see so many
clever young faces here today.

I heard a senator in your parliament
ask if this country

has the right policies in place
for the next 10 years.

The answer is yes, you do.

But if you want to live
beyond those 10 years, then no.

You have almost no single...

Can you push it to 1:30, please?

I am sorry, I'm not sure
what's happened to him.

That's OK, I'm not a journo.

I'm a sparky on my break.
I just needed a chair.

When he does arrive, I wonder if you
wouldn't mind not telling him that.

It's kind of my first day.

OK.

Conservative voices
keep representing science

as somehow left wing,

as having a radical agenda
that will destroy the economy.

But science is neither
left or right wing.

It is science.

When we fly, when we get chest X-rays,

when we take treatments for cancer,

we do so because of science.

Do we ask if the science that made
these is left or right wing?

As scientists, we assemble data,

analyse it and try and predict a future.

And science tells us that nothing
will destabilise an economy more

than global warming.

Our obsession with economic growth
is killing the world...

Can't talk, move it to 2:30.

It's like telling a morbidly obese person

they must eat more chocolate cake.

At some point, they will explode.

Well, thank you so much.

It was so lovely, lovely to meet you.

Senator Cleaver Greene.
I was your fellow speaker here today.

Li Ming Wu. Hi.

I am so sorry I missed your talk. My
flight from the States was delayed.

I hope I didn't repeat anything
you said already.

There was a bit of an overlap,

but look I don't think you can get
that message about the environment

through to kids enough.

So, you are part of the government.

Well, I am, you know,
I am a senator, as I said.

But no, very much an independent.

I often feel like the lone voice
in a sea of deniers.

I hear very good things about...
is it David Potter?

Oh, God, no.

- No, no, no. Lot of hot air there.
- Oh.

He is not committed in the same way
you or I are.

Yeah, it is interesting.

I got him off murder charges
in a previous life.

- Oh!
- Yeah.

Oh, dear. You were a lawyer?

Mainly human rights stuff, yeah.

Yes. How long are you in Canberra for?

I leave tomorrow night.

What about

dinner tonight?

I'm afraid not.

Lunch tomorrow?

Uh...

Well, OK, Senator.

If you can make it a late one.

Oh, I can make it an anyone,
I'll push my schedule.

Can we make it at Wang's?

Wang's, why?

Do you not like it?
It's my favourite place in Canberra.

Oh, yes. It's mine too.

- I can't get enough.
- Fantastic.

- Can we say two?
- Yes.

Yeah. Just you and me.

I meant the time.

- That was funny.
- Yeah, I know.

I knew. I knew that.

Darling, I'm home.

Sweetheart?

It's just me, pet.

- Allkirk's resigned.
- Yes, yes, I heard.

Weak little bastard.

There's a vacancy in the house, then.

I want it.

We live just across the road
from that seat.

Well, I can certainly put in
a good word for you, my love.

Get it for me?

Well, I don't think I have that kind
of power anymore, sweetness.

Then find it.

Yes, my love.

Yes.

It's really tricky setting up
a press conference.

Let's just learn from this
and move on, OK?

Do you realise that there are
18 million acres of forest

- destroyed every year?
- What?

That is how much forest
is destroyed every year.

The Gossnard net-winged beetle
is on the endangered list now.

Right.

Not to forget the wartbiter cricket.
Almost extinct.

I need every paper, bill,

amendment and thought bubble we have
on the government's environment

policies and our take on them.

You have none.
You haven't read them and...

I will, I will, I will.

OK. OK.

Here you go.

Oh, fuck, this is all...

Here we go.

Oh, fuck. OK, alright.

Here's... Here's a better idea.

You read those and summarise them
and get back to me please, quickly.

How is that better?

And everything we can find out
about a Li Ming Wu,

please, by lunchtime.

If she is your lunch date, Cleaver,
you are wasting your time.

I mean, she's...

She is so far out of your orbit
you could not locate her

with the Hubble telescope.

I mean, does she know who you are?

And if you wouldn't mind having a
look at my Wikipedia entry, please,

and changing the bit about my jail term.

Thank you.

Overlooking the fact that I detest
every facet of you,

we need to form an alliance
and bring down Potter.

Humans release 37 billion tonnes
of carbon dioxide every year.

You'd have to think a lot of that
is coming from you, isn't it?

Are you hearing me?

It's the highest level
for over 650,000 years and now

there is over a million species
facing extinction.

I knew it was bad...

If we form an alliance
we can own this story,

which right now is the biggest story
in town.

Or I can pursue my defamation case
against you with vigour

and you'll be destroyed.

You know, Penny,
I do so miss the old courtroom.

- So what are we going to do?
- That Greene, Potter was right.

Noyce is trying to offload
his company ASAP

and he papered a few palms
to ease the passage.

He will never stand between
Sellick and a $5 note.

So why is old man Noyce
trying to ditch his company?

I have got no idea.
We're still looking into it.

Peking duck with chestnuts and chilli.

What about that fucking munchkin?

I mean...

- Crab, Szechuan style.
- He's resigned.

- What's that about?
- Yeah, well,

stuck at the intelligence than
the moral integrity not to resign.

- Until they convict him.
- Yeah.

Wagyu steak in oyster sauce.

Just dump it, pal.

Look, on the upside,

we now have the chance to Trojan Horse

our own person
in that snivelling arsehole seat.

Oh, that's good.

That's good.

OK. Names.

Names. Come on.

What the hell is this?

It's alphabetical.

Well, I'm going to change my name
to Aardvark

before I let her come before me.

Oh. It seems
more balanced, don't you think?

Balanced is not what this show's about.

Balanced is the very issue
that we fight against.

Tough, unrelenting, hard hitting,
honest and completely biased.

That's what this show stands for.

I'm not so sure the public sees you
that way anymore, Cal.

What?

You seem weaker.

Soft. You're softer.

But as always, if you're not 100%
happy, I'm very happy to change it.

I'm not even 2% happy.

Change it.

- On to it.
- Hmm.

- Carry on.
- Who is this?

Right. Sure.

Where?

Hi.

I need you to get on
one of your magical apps

and tell me what this piece of music
is called.

- Do you have a reservation?
- Get out!

You're not welcome.
You exposed yourself to my boys.

Look, I explained about that.

That was just talking to them
about their basketball habits.

With no trousers and your penis
for all the world to see?

- Penis! You're...
- Shame!

I am so sorry.

I didn't see you come in.

I am a tragic failed musician.

This man is with you?

- Yes. He is.
- Seriously?

- Yes.
- This man?

- Yes.
- Oh, yes.

Oh, yeah.

Who let that pretzel in?

- Jesus! And with her?
- Thank you.

I can't walk past a piano
without wanting to play something.

- Me too.
- Oh.

And that was the Schubert Impromptu
no less.

Number 3G flat major...

- Major.
- Am I right?

- You play?
- I tinkle. I tinkle.

We must play together after our meal.

I broke this, um, in a tennis incident.

- Oh, dear.
- Yeah.

Oh, tennis.

I dreamed of being a professional,
but science got hold of me.

Tell me, what other instruments
do you play?

Mainly the flugelhorn.

Oh.

I know only strings and keyboards

and I am trying to so hard to learn
the saxophone but, oh.

Yeah. It's...

So many instruments.

Well, there are only so many hours
in a day.

I never understand how people
are so happy to waste them.

Mmm.

You know, music makes me believe

that the world can still be
a beautiful place.

We are capable of such exquisite beauty,

but everywhere we are reduced
to the petty and venal.

The lot of man.

I was in Burkina Faso two weeks ago.

What man has done to man.

Burkina Faso has a green and gold
flag with some red on it?

So, have you been there?

- Burkina Faso?
- Mmm.

It's... Oh, landlocked.

- Gold.
- Mmm.

The French influence, of course.

Yes. And poverty that drives people
into dust.

Should we order something to eat?

Absolutely.

Well!

Our new Prime Minister.

- Should I curtsy?
- No formalities here, Cal.

- No time.
- Ah.

- Been a few years.
- It has, Roy.

Last time was when you voted me off
the state executive.

Well, some blood's passed
under that bridge

and lots of regrets have flown with it.

I suppose you know what this is about?

Oh, what? Your shipwreck?

Two days in office. Noyce Industries.

Two senators clinging to the wreckage.

At least one rep's vacancy to fill.

I mean, I'm just guessing,
of course, mate.

If it hadn't have been
for Evans and Greene and Potter,

this thing would have sailed through.

I hope you didn't have any shares
in the company?

I need to fill Allkirk's rep seat,

tout suite, before this thing
haemorrhages any further.

Well, could I suggest my wife?

Jane? Jane Green?

God, no. Sorry.

Right.

- Well, who then?
- Well, you.

I want you!

I know we have history.

Two years ago I would have had
nothing to do with you,

but this new gentler, user-friendly
Cal we're seeing on our screens,

it's exactly what this party's
crying out for.

Right. Well...

Married life has softened me, mate.

I know you'll take a drop,
a major drop financially.

But if you agree to this position,

I'll make you a minister straight off.

A minister?

- Doing what?
- I don't know.

I'll do a reshuffle.

It will guarantee me
two full terms as leader.

After that,
how does Cal McGregor PM sound?

Because I have to say,
it plays out OK in the party room.

Oh.

Have you talked to my half-brother
about this?

No. The Coalition's full of
head kickers and flat earthers.

I want to demonstrate a warmer,
vulnerable side to the public.

You are that man to help me.

I need to know the total CO2 output
of coal fire reactors in the 1960s.

Actually, do you know what? Forget it.

I'm going to wing it. Bye.

Sorry. Some stupid standing
committee on clean coal generators.

No such thing.

Which is why I keep saying wind and sun.

- Wind and sun.
- Wind?

Really? Isn't that
far too unreliable for baseload?

Yes. Ah...

Yeah. But the sun's great.

Well, the production of batteries
and solar cells is proving a massive

environmental challenge.

Yeah. I mean, anything's better
than nuclear, though.

I don't know.

The two major explosions
at nuclear reactors caused

infinitely less death and health
damage than coal does every day.

How many times have I made that point?

The problem is waste.

As I keep stressing.

If they can get its half-life down
to 250 years, not 250,000,

one might think about it differently.

Weirdly, I have just delivered
a paper on precisely that point.

What I don't understand

is why does this government refuse
to engage with these problems?

Why?

Your concerns here seem so trivial
when the problems are so great.

Mmm.

Are you sure
you can't find another hour or so?

It is not often I spend time with
someone who shares my passions.

- I'm afraid not.
- Oh.

My assistant was right.

Not even with the Hubble telescope.

Sorry?

Do you want to know

what I have been campaigning for
in the Senate?

Do you want to know
what's been occupying my days?

Tell me.

Never mind.

I learnt the flugelhorn for three weeks

and then I stomped on the bloody thing.

You can go.

To the house?

Oh, yeah.

Later tonight you might receive
a call from someone called Mohamed.

He's with a breakaway faction
of the drivers.

Don't listen to him.

Actually, do you know what?

Change of plans.
I don't want to go to the house.

And I don't want to go home.

Can I give you a hand there?

Oh. Thank you.

- What...
- Thompson.

- Thompson?
- Up the top, there.

Oh, yep.

- They don't make it easy, do they?
- No.

- There we go.
- Thank you.

Maybe we should just go around
the block one more time.

It won't help, Cal.

We have driven around 12 times already.

Yes.

Just go in there and tell her the truth.

Yes. Yes. Just... Straight up.

- Straight up.
- Straight up.

Walk in there and tell her how it is.

Yes! Yes.

And how is it?

You fought for her
with everything you had

but they wanted you because
of your wider political experience.

Yes! My wide experience.

- And then what?
- Then you objected.

I objected. I objected!

And... And then I threatened them,
and then...

You tell her that...

I tell her that... once inside
Parliament I will work tirelessly...

- Around the clock.
- Bugger!

Around the clock
to make sure that she is elected.

- You can do it.
- I can do it, mate.

I'm Cal McGregor!

Darling? I'm home, pet.

Drive!

Drive very quickly away.

Drive!

So, Andy did some digging
and he found out

that the Noyces had to sell in a hurry

because sadly old man Noyce
had a brain tumour.

I really don't give a shit.

That idiot almost cost us the Government.

Charming. So now you ask me
what they think caused the tumour.

- What?
- The green stripe.

No bloody way.

Yeah. As filthy as an unwiped arsehole.

As toxic as a uranium mudslide.

You know who found out about it?

The fucking Beijing health authorities.

Apparently the green stripes
are a mixture

of some petroleum by-products
and a Brazilian insecticide.

The insecticide gives a flavour,
the petroleum the colour.

- So what's in the yellow stripe?
- We're still looking into that.

But this is the point,

here is this company
sitting on a litigation time bomb.

They have to sell up quick,

flee town before the shit
hits the fast-rotating blades.

The question for us is this,

were Sellick and Wells
aware of this health report?

Of course the fuck they were.
I mean, they're dead men walking.

The only upside is my half-brother
had shares in them.

Do you know who Webster just
appointed to fill Allkirk's seat?

No-one. Because I haven't told them
who I want in there yet.

Um...

He's just announced it.

It's your half-brother, Cal McGregor.

- Is it true? Is it fucking true?
- What?

That mealy-mouthed prolapsed
arsehole I made PM, hey,

naively thinking that he was just
a useless puff of fart wind

who would do as he was fucking told

has offered my fucking half-brother
Allkirk's seat?!

You!

Confess! Huh?

Has he announced it?

OK. OK.

This is good news.

What is the shortest ever term
for an Australian prime minister?

Frank Forde. Eight days.

I reckon we can better that.

Hey. G'day, mate.

I am humbled...

Do you ever feel like
you're on some far-flung asteroid

and looking down
through the Hubble telescope

and you see yourself as you really are?

Some infinitesimal speck of dust

stuck to a ball
spinning in the middle of infinity?

And you're this tiny, tiny thing.

Sans purpose, sans consequence.

Stuck in the aspic of eternity

with no more import than the
fossilised turds of a woodlouse.

Ever have those days?

Gee! I reckon that just
deserves an Oz Ripple.

I reckon I could rip into a Ripple
myself.

♪ Oz Ripple, Oz Ripple ♪

♪ It's a fair dinkum Oz Ripple... ♪

What do you reckon about that, mate?

I love Oz Ripples.

♪ It's a fair dinkum Oz Ripple ♪

♪ It's a fair dinkum Oz Ripple. ♪

I'm Cal McGregor. I am Cal McGregor.

At 9:30 this morning

I became leader of the Federal
Parliamentary Liberal Party.

You have let this fucking Trojan
Horse into our party room.

Come on, mate! Get it in there!

Get it in there! Yes!

Would you ever consider
taking me on as a client?

Fuck it! I'm finished.

What? Nicole!

Nicole!

He's got a gun!

That's a gun! That's a fucking gun.

Ouch!