Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:01,868 --> 00:00:05,701
The new deputy mayor...
late on his first day.
2
00:00:05,734 --> 00:00:07,701
Cut him some slack.
This city's a mess.
3
00:00:07,734 --> 00:00:09,801
Anyone could be late
with the traffic jams,
4
00:00:09,834 --> 00:00:11,434
slow buses,
broken-down subways.
5
00:00:11,467 --> 00:00:13,167
If only there were
a group of people
6
00:00:13,200 --> 00:00:14,968
whose job it was
to fix those things.
7
00:00:15,000 --> 00:00:16,634
I'll give him five minutes,
8
00:00:16,667 --> 00:00:18,701
then I'm the new deputy mayor.
9
00:00:18,734 --> 00:00:20,200
Got my speech all ready.
10
00:00:20,234 --> 00:00:23,267
That's your opening...
"hello, single ladies"?
11
00:00:23,300 --> 00:00:26,601
Carter, he's got to show.
12
00:00:26,634 --> 00:00:28,834
Ever since Mike left,
I have been doing two jobs.
13
00:00:28,868 --> 00:00:31,434
I don't sleep, I spend every
waking minute in this office,
14
00:00:31,467 --> 00:00:33,701
I look terrible.
You look great.
15
00:00:33,734 --> 00:00:35,133
I know...
16
00:00:35,167 --> 00:00:38,267
But the only straight guys
that see it are Stuart and Paul.
17
00:00:38,300 --> 00:00:39,667
Don't worry.
18
00:00:39,701 --> 00:00:41,934
He'll be here,
and Paul can stall the press.
19
00:00:41,968 --> 00:00:45,133
John Travolta was in
"Pulp Fiction" with ving rhames.
20
00:00:45,167 --> 00:00:47,234
Ving rhames was
in "mission: Impossible"
21
00:00:47,267 --> 00:00:48,667
with tom cruise.
22
00:00:48,701 --> 00:00:51,868
Tom cruise was in "a few
good men" with...Kevin bacon.
23
00:00:53,667 --> 00:00:55,000
Am I wrong?
24
00:00:55,033 --> 00:00:57,334
Paul! Paul! Paul!
25
00:00:57,367 --> 00:01:00,200
We're familiar with Crawford's
success in Washington.
26
00:01:00,234 --> 00:01:02,734
We're also familiar
with his checkered past.
27
00:01:02,767 --> 00:01:05,901
I can't help but wonder
if you're hiding something.
28
00:01:05,934 --> 00:01:10,467
Look, the only reason thatCharlie Crawford isn't here
29
00:01:10,501 --> 00:01:13,167
is becausehe's at a high-level meeting.
30
00:01:13,200 --> 00:01:16,167
Charlie, what did you say
your last name was again?
31
00:01:16,200 --> 00:01:19,934
Whoa...
let's not rush things.
32
00:01:19,968 --> 00:01:22,901
Seriously, I think they're
talking about you on the tv.
33
00:01:24,467 --> 00:01:27,000
I assure you...
34
00:01:27,033 --> 00:01:29,434
Charlie Crawfordis in the building.
35
00:01:29,467 --> 00:01:30,501
Damn it.
36
00:01:30,534 --> 00:01:33,601
I'm still on Stockholm time.
37
00:01:33,634 --> 00:01:35,601
Inga, I'm sorry.
I have to run.
38
00:01:36,934 --> 00:01:38,734
I hope you understand.
39
00:01:38,767 --> 00:01:40,000
No, it's fine.
40
00:01:40,033 --> 00:01:42,100
Thank you
for flying air Sweden.
41
00:01:42,133 --> 00:01:46,701
Thanks for the upgrade.
42
00:02:11,734 --> 00:02:13,901
He's gonna be here, right?
43
00:02:13,934 --> 00:02:16,434
Carter, you told Charlie
it was 10:00 A.M.?
44
00:02:16,467 --> 00:02:17,734
In New York?
45
00:02:17,767 --> 00:02:18,801
Yes.
46
00:02:18,834 --> 00:02:20,934
Can I be deputy mayor now?
47
00:02:20,968 --> 00:02:22,067
No!
No!
48
00:02:22,100 --> 00:02:24,534
Hi... Charlie Crawford.
49
00:02:24,567 --> 00:02:28,000
Sorry I'm late...
really sorry.
50
00:02:28,033 --> 00:02:30,400
I assume you have
a good excuse?
51
00:02:30,434 --> 00:02:32,400
I reall don't think
we should get into it.
52
00:02:32,434 --> 00:02:34,734
I really think we should.
53
00:02:34,767 --> 00:02:37,000
Last night flying home
from Stockholm...
54
00:02:37,033 --> 00:02:38,167
oh, don't tell me...
55
00:02:38,200 --> 00:02:39,667
you met some stewardess
56
00:02:39,701 --> 00:02:42,033
and ended up going back
to her hotel.
57
00:02:44,601 --> 00:02:47,133
Oh, God!
58
00:02:47,167 --> 00:02:51,734
And that how I learned
that I was allergic to beets.
59
00:02:51,767 --> 00:02:53,133
Okay?
60
00:02:53,167 --> 00:02:54,434
O-okay...
61
00:02:54,467 --> 00:02:55,501
Oh, thank God.
62
00:02:55,534 --> 00:02:57,300
Okay, ladies and gentlemen,
63
00:02:57,334 --> 00:03:00,934
presenting the new deputy mayor
for the city of New York,
64
00:03:00,968 --> 00:03:02,667
Charlie Crawford.
65
00:03:02,701 --> 00:03:03,801
Thank you, Paul.
66
00:03:03,834 --> 00:03:05,868
Hello, I'm Charlie Crawford,
67
00:03:05,901 --> 00:03:08,801
and I'm very excited
to be here at city hall.
68
00:03:08,834 --> 00:03:10,501
To come home to where I grew up
69
00:03:10,534 --> 00:03:13,334
and work with such a fine mayor
really means a lot to me.
70
00:03:13,367 --> 00:03:15,467
I'm sure you all have
a lot of questions.
71
00:03:15,501 --> 00:03:17,667
Why were you late?
72
00:03:17,701 --> 00:03:20,634
Well, let's just say my delay
was...Airline related.
73
00:03:20,667 --> 00:03:22,801
Oh, I'd like to state
for the record
74
00:03:22,834 --> 00:03:25,834
that I'd gladly flyair Sweden again...
75
00:03:25,868 --> 00:03:28,400
maybe Friday nightaround 7:00?
76
00:03:28,434 --> 00:03:31,200
Charlie, what about the rumor
that you once considered
77
00:03:31,234 --> 00:03:33,767
running a senate campaign
for actor Alec Baldwin?
78
00:03:33,801 --> 00:03:34,968
That was just talk
79
00:03:35,000 --> 00:03:37,167
over quite a few beers
one night.
80
00:03:37,200 --> 00:03:38,934
When I woke up
the next morning,
81
00:03:38,968 --> 00:03:41,634
I realized I had actually
been talking to Billy Baldwin.
82
00:03:43,367 --> 00:03:45,934
Those Baldwin brothers
should wear numbered shirts.
83
00:03:47,300 --> 00:03:49,934
We have plenty of time
to get to know each other,
84
00:03:49,968 --> 00:03:51,267
and I look forward to that,
85
00:03:51,300 --> 00:03:53,300
but right now,
I got a lot of work to do.
86
00:03:53,334 --> 00:03:55,367
So Paul will take it from here.
Thank you.
87
00:03:55,400 --> 00:03:56,801
Paul! Paul! Paul!
88
00:03:56,834 --> 00:03:59,534
Please, please,
you heard the man...
89
00:03:59,567 --> 00:04:02,801
he thought he was talking
to Alec Baldwin...
90
00:04:02,834 --> 00:04:06,367
Who was in "glengarry Glen Ross"
with Jack lemmon,
91
00:04:06,400 --> 00:04:09,000
who was in "jfk" with...
Kevin bacon!
92
00:04:09,033 --> 00:04:12,167
Didn't I tell you guys
he'd get here and he'd be great?
93
00:04:12,200 --> 00:04:14,100
You were great.
Thank you.
94
00:04:14,133 --> 00:04:16,467
Really, really great.
95
00:04:16,501 --> 00:04:18,267
All right, let's cut the bull.
96
00:04:18,300 --> 00:04:20,133
I know what you're all about...
97
00:04:20,167 --> 00:04:22,234
a flashy smile,
a clever sound bite,
98
00:04:22,267 --> 00:04:23,534
and everyone loves you.
99
00:04:23,567 --> 00:04:26,234
That's not gonna work
around here, mister.
100
00:04:26,267 --> 00:04:28,300
You seem nicer
in your e-mail.
101
00:04:28,334 --> 00:04:29,367
I a nicer,
102
00:04:29,400 --> 00:04:31,434
but I have hundreds
of tollbooth workers
103
00:04:31,467 --> 00:04:33,567
about to go on strike,
so you'll excuse me
104
00:04:33,601 --> 00:04:35,901
if I don't offer you
a headset and warm towel.
105
00:04:35,934 --> 00:04:37,300
All I'm saying is,
106
00:04:37,334 --> 00:04:40,033
you're the new quarterback,
so don't drop the ball.
107
00:04:40,067 --> 00:04:41,133
You know sports?
108
00:04:41,167 --> 00:04:44,300
Yes! I also drink beer
and play poker.
109
00:04:44,334 --> 00:04:48,200
I'm just a tattoo away
from being your dream girl.
110
00:04:48,234 --> 00:04:50,467
You know, usually
I have to date a woman
111
00:04:50,501 --> 00:04:52,334
befo she treats me this way.
112
00:04:52,367 --> 00:04:55,367
And you're funny, too...
super.
113
00:04:56,767 --> 00:04:58,868
I recommended you to the mayor
for this job
114
00:04:58,901 --> 00:05:01,300
because I know you're good
and I heard you changed.
115
00:05:01,334 --> 00:05:03,601
I have changed.
116
00:05:03,634 --> 00:05:05,033
For God's sake,
117
00:05:05,067 --> 00:05:07,667
you're wearing air Sweden wings
on your shirt!
118
00:05:07,701 --> 00:05:09,400
Hey!
119
00:05:09,434 --> 00:05:13,200
I earned these.
120
00:05:13,234 --> 00:05:16,334
Mr. mayor?
121
00:05:16,367 --> 00:05:18,467
Ooh! Hi.
Sit down, sit down.
122
00:05:18,501 --> 00:05:21,100
Sir, about being late
this morning...
123
00:05:21,133 --> 00:05:24,501
I'm sorry, I'm having trouble
waking up these days.
124
00:05:24,534 --> 00:05:27,200
I moved the alarm clock
across the room.
125
00:05:27,234 --> 00:05:29,467
You know...
get up, turn it off?
126
00:05:29,501 --> 00:05:32,801
But after two days,
I just moved my bed over there.
127
00:05:32,834 --> 00:05:34,801
I see from your bio
128
00:05:34,834 --> 00:05:38,367
that you're "relaxed,
easygoing,
129
00:05:38,400 --> 00:05:42,000
and comfortable
at work or play."
130
00:05:42,033 --> 00:05:44,968
Sir, that's
the j. Crew catalog.
131
00:05:45,000 --> 00:05:46,367
Oh, yeah, here it is.
132
00:05:46,400 --> 00:05:49,734
I am impressed with your work
as a political strategist.
133
00:05:49,767 --> 00:05:51,801
But I have also read
the tabloids,
134
00:05:51,834 --> 00:05:54,501
and I am aware
of your past transgressions...
135
00:05:54,534 --> 00:05:57,300
the drinking, the carousing,
the honky-tonking.
136
00:05:57,334 --> 00:05:59,067
I'd like to think
137
00:05:59,100 --> 00:06:03,200
I did more tomcatting
than honky-tonking.
138
00:06:03,234 --> 00:06:04,601
Well, I am sure
139
00:06:04,634 --> 00:06:07,501
you're the right man
for the job.
140
00:06:07,534 --> 00:06:09,934
My former deputy mayor,
Mike, and I
141
00:06:09,968 --> 00:06:11,434
had a special relationship
142
00:06:11,467 --> 00:06:13,667
which would be difficult
to duplicate,
143
00:06:13,701 --> 00:06:15,767
but I'm willing
to give it a shot.
144
00:06:17,000 --> 00:06:19,200
Look, this just isn't
working out.
145
00:06:20,901 --> 00:06:23,000
We could just give you
a severance package
146
00:06:23,033 --> 00:06:24,300
and send you on your way.
147
00:06:24,334 --> 00:06:26,200
How long have you been
working here?
148
00:06:26,234 --> 00:06:28,634
About 11 minutes.
149
00:06:28,667 --> 00:06:30,300
Well, based on
our time together,
150
00:06:30,334 --> 00:06:32,767
I'd be happy to write you
a letter of recommendation.
151
00:06:32,801 --> 00:06:34,133
I appreciate that,
152
00:06:34,167 --> 00:06:36,400
but I don't think
there's anyone left to read it.
153
00:06:36,434 --> 00:06:38,968
I burned a lot of Bridges
in Washington...
154
00:06:39,000 --> 00:06:41,834
And one car.
155
00:06:41,868 --> 00:06:44,868
This is my last shot.
156
00:06:44,901 --> 00:06:47,200
Perhaps it would be
easier for me
157
00:06:47,234 --> 00:06:48,634
if I called you Mike.
158
00:06:48,667 --> 00:06:51,400
I'd like to start
with a clean slate, sir,
159
00:06:51,434 --> 00:06:52,834
so if you don't mind,
160
00:06:52,868 --> 00:06:55,267
I'd prefer
if you called me Charlie.
161
00:06:55,300 --> 00:06:57,901
I appreciate your candor, Mike.
162
00:06:59,701 --> 00:07:01,267
Good news, sir...
163
00:07:01,300 --> 00:07:03,534
I spoke to the lawyer
representing the workers.
164
00:07:03,567 --> 00:07:06,367
They have agreed terms.
She's coming in this afternoon.
165
00:07:06,400 --> 00:07:08,734
Caitlin, you are doing
a fantastic job!
166
00:07:08,767 --> 00:07:11,467
Thank you, sir.
That means a lot to me.
167
00:07:14,200 --> 00:07:19,033
It's all about making people
feel special...Mike.
168
00:07:22,067 --> 00:07:23,467
Who's this guy think he is?!
169
00:07:23,501 --> 00:07:25,901
First he hangs me out to dry
at the press conference.
170
00:07:25,934 --> 00:07:27,767
Now he's late
to his own staff meeting.
171
00:07:27,801 --> 00:07:30,300
We got to make it clear
who's running this show!
172
00:07:30,334 --> 00:07:32,100
We can't let him take
any of our turf!
173
00:07:32,133 --> 00:07:35,601
I keep forgetting...
are we the jets or the sharks?
174
00:07:36,968 --> 00:07:39,467
Just count me out
of your petty little games.
175
00:07:39,501 --> 00:07:41,501
Charlie is obviously
going to look to me
176
00:07:41,534 --> 00:07:42,767
for guidance and counsel,
177
00:07:42,801 --> 00:07:44,634
and Carter's gonna be there
for him.
178
00:07:44,667 --> 00:07:47,868
I guess it's just me and Paul
standing against the new guy.
179
00:07:47,901 --> 00:07:49,868
You and me, buddy...
united we stand,
180
00:07:49,901 --> 00:07:52,234
divided we f...
181
00:07:52,267 --> 00:07:54,901
hiya, Charlie!
How are you?!
182
00:07:54,934 --> 00:07:57,934
Let's make that
a one-time thing.
183
00:07:57,968 --> 00:07:59,234
Okay, before we start,
184
00:07:59,267 --> 00:08:01,501
I thought we could spend
a little time
185
00:08:01,534 --> 00:08:03,100
getting to know each other.
186
00:08:03,133 --> 00:08:04,367
Caitlin sent me a memo
187
00:08:04,400 --> 00:08:06,200
to get me up to speed
on you guys.
188
00:08:06,234 --> 00:08:07,534
Carter...
189
00:08:07,567 --> 00:08:09,434
It says here you've done
a lot of great work
190
00:08:09,467 --> 00:08:10,834
on community programs.
191
00:08:10,868 --> 00:08:13,200
I don't, uh, think of it
as work.
192
00:08:13,234 --> 00:08:15,667
I think of it
as more of a calling.
193
00:08:15,701 --> 00:08:17,968
In a word,
I'm a helper, a doer.
194
00:08:18,000 --> 00:08:20,934
I can't see spending my life
in any other way.
195
00:08:20,968 --> 00:08:23,834
It also says you don't mind
talking about it.
196
00:08:25,033 --> 00:08:26,133
Now, Paul...
197
00:08:26,167 --> 00:08:29,367
okay, enough
of this witch hunt!
198
00:08:29,400 --> 00:08:32,133
Look, every reporter in town
is pestering me
199
00:08:32,167 --> 00:08:34,467
to get the first interview
with you.
200
00:08:34,501 --> 00:08:36,901
Okay, what do you want to do?
201
00:08:36,934 --> 00:08:38,067
I-I'm sorry.
202
00:08:38,100 --> 00:08:41,033
I'm not accustomed
to being listened to.
203
00:08:41,067 --> 00:08:42,400
Tell you what...
204
00:08:42,434 --> 00:08:43,767
you pick the reporter.
205
00:08:43,801 --> 00:08:46,767
You're the press secretary.
It's your domain.
206
00:08:46,801 --> 00:08:47,901
Yes, it is.
207
00:08:47,934 --> 00:08:49,801
It's my domain.
208
00:08:49,834 --> 00:08:53,534
I have a domain.
209
00:08:53,567 --> 00:08:55,000
Stuart, it says here
210
00:08:55,033 --> 00:08:58,033
you're involved in the war
on pornography.
211
00:09:00,200 --> 00:09:02,334
You're reading that wrong.
212
00:09:02,367 --> 00:09:05,868
It's the war
on the war on pornography.
213
00:09:05,901 --> 00:09:08,534
I thought that was a typo.
214
00:09:13,634 --> 00:09:14,934
Charlie!
215
00:09:14,968 --> 00:09:16,834
You're not gonna yell at me
again?
216
00:09:16,868 --> 00:09:19,434
'Cause I got to warn you...
I'm a crier.
217
00:09:19,467 --> 00:09:21,968
I was a little harsh
this morning, but I'm happy now.
218
00:09:22,000 --> 00:09:24,100
The toll collectors
are going back to work.
219
00:09:24,133 --> 00:09:26,701
I'm going to sign the contracts.
Want to come with me?
220
00:09:26,734 --> 00:09:28,634
Can I bring a date?
221
00:09:28,667 --> 00:09:32,334
You're right...
I might meet someone there.
222
00:09:32,367 --> 00:09:34,367
I'm glad we were able to come
to an agreement.
223
00:09:34,400 --> 00:09:37,901
If the collectors picketed,
the city would be gridlocked.
224
00:09:37,934 --> 00:09:39,634
I'd hate to have to look down
225
00:09:39,667 --> 00:09:41,534
and see that
from my helicopter.
226
00:09:43,067 --> 00:09:46,000
Well, I guess
all I need is a pen.
227
00:09:50,000 --> 00:09:52,334
I don't believe it!
228
00:09:52,367 --> 00:09:54,000
What are you doing here?
229
00:09:54,033 --> 00:09:56,434
I'm the mayor.
I've been here the whole time.
230
00:09:56,467 --> 00:09:58,634
I thought
I would never see you again,
231
00:09:58,667 --> 00:10:00,100
and I wish I hadn't.
232
00:10:00,133 --> 00:10:03,300
You're egotistical, insensitive,
and you know what else?
233
00:10:04,300 --> 00:10:05,667
You're a selfish lover!
234
00:10:05,701 --> 00:10:08,634
Now, that crosses the line!
235
00:10:08,667 --> 00:10:10,033
Excuse me!
236
00:10:10,067 --> 00:10:12,200
My pen!
237
00:10:14,267 --> 00:10:16,767
We used to date.
238
00:10:18,067 --> 00:10:21,300
Apparently, it ended poorly.
239
00:10:27,200 --> 00:10:28,968
What is wrong with that woman?!
240
00:10:29,000 --> 00:10:32,234
And how does she know
what I'm like in bed?
241
00:10:32,267 --> 00:10:35,434
Actually, sir,
she was talking about me.
242
00:10:35,467 --> 00:10:38,701
Miss Calvin and I
sort of have a history.
243
00:10:38,734 --> 00:10:41,200
Oh, you're the selfish lover.
244
00:10:41,234 --> 00:10:43,100
A word of advice, son...
245
00:10:43,133 --> 00:10:46,200
there is no "I"
in "orgasm."
246
00:10:48,667 --> 00:10:50,300
Guys, we have a problem here.
247
00:10:50,334 --> 00:10:52,901
Tomorrow the toll collectors
are planning to block
248
00:10:52,934 --> 00:10:54,501
all the Bridges and tunnels.
249
00:10:54,534 --> 00:10:56,734
Mike would never
have let this happen.
250
00:10:56,767 --> 00:10:59,300
Not you, Mike...
251
00:10:59,334 --> 00:11:01,434
Mike Mike.
252
00:11:01,467 --> 00:11:04,234
Nice work... thanks to you,
by noon tomorrow,
253
00:11:04,267 --> 00:11:07,200
8 million people
are gonna be stuck in Manhattan.
254
00:11:07,234 --> 00:11:08,501
You are so negative.
255
00:11:08,534 --> 00:11:11,400
You see 8 million people
trapped on an island.
256
00:11:11,434 --> 00:11:13,968
I see the opportunity
for a giant mixer.
257
00:11:14,000 --> 00:11:15,501
I know this is serious.
258
00:11:15,534 --> 00:11:18,334
This is not the way
I wanted to start here.
259
00:11:18,367 --> 00:11:20,534
I'll do whatever I have to
to fix this.
260
00:11:20,567 --> 00:11:21,934
You've got to talk to Joan.
261
00:11:21,968 --> 00:11:24,234
If I talk to this woman,
she's gonna flip out.
262
00:11:24,267 --> 00:11:26,834
She'll get that crazy look
where her eyes are daggers
263
00:11:26,868 --> 00:11:28,234
and she wants
to bore a hole through...
264
00:11:28,267 --> 00:11:30,267
that's it!
265
00:11:30,300 --> 00:11:31,667
I am calling her right now,
266
00:11:31,701 --> 00:11:34,300
and you two are gonna
work this out... end of story.
267
00:11:34,334 --> 00:11:36,634
What if she wants
to sleep with me?
268
00:11:36,667 --> 00:11:39,133
She looked like
she wanted to knock you down
269
00:11:39,167 --> 00:11:40,400
and rip your eyes out.
270
00:11:40,434 --> 00:11:42,701
That's usually how it starts.
271
00:11:44,767 --> 00:11:46,200
Paul...
272
00:11:46,234 --> 00:11:48,300
I need you to set up
a press conference
273
00:11:48,334 --> 00:11:50,801
to announce the mayor's new plan
to end poverty.
274
00:11:50,834 --> 00:11:52,100
Oh, please.
275
00:11:52,133 --> 00:11:54,734
I don't have time
for your petty, little requests.
276
00:11:54,767 --> 00:11:57,334
I got to pick a reporter
to talk to the new boss.
277
00:11:57,367 --> 00:11:58,567
See, that's my domain.
278
00:11:58,601 --> 00:11:59,734
Ugh!
279
00:11:59,767 --> 00:12:01,701
My domain.
280
00:12:01,734 --> 00:12:05,801
Now, what did Charlie say
was your domain, hmm?
281
00:12:05,834 --> 00:12:08,467
Oh, that's right...
nothing.
282
00:12:08,501 --> 00:12:11,067
Sooner or later, Charlie
will come to me for help.
283
00:12:11,100 --> 00:12:13,167
A moment of crisis
will present itself,
284
00:12:13,200 --> 00:12:14,834
and then...
It's Carter time.
285
00:12:14,868 --> 00:12:17,234
Excuse me, Paul.
286
00:12:17,267 --> 00:12:18,734
Let me ask you...
287
00:12:18,767 --> 00:12:20,200
why do you think
288
00:12:20,234 --> 00:12:22,100
Charlie would let you
make a decision?
289
00:12:22,133 --> 00:12:24,901
Why would he let me
make a decision?
290
00:12:26,167 --> 00:12:29,300
Why would he let me
make a decision?
291
00:12:29,334 --> 00:12:30,467
Oh, my God!
292
00:12:30,501 --> 00:12:33,100
He's setting me up to fail
so he can dump me,
293
00:12:33,133 --> 00:12:34,167
bring in his guy!
294
00:12:34,200 --> 00:12:36,067
He's got a guy?
295
00:12:36,100 --> 00:12:39,133
They've all got guys!
And you know where his guy is?!
296
00:12:39,167 --> 00:12:41,634
Waiting in the wings,
chomping at the bit!
297
00:12:41,667 --> 00:12:44,300
Oh, God, if I don't pick
the right reporter,
298
00:12:44,334 --> 00:12:47,467
it's "goodbye, city hall,
hello, refrigerator box"!
299
00:12:48,734 --> 00:12:52,234
It's not even
a challenge anymore.
300
00:12:54,801 --> 00:12:56,067
I just talked with Joan.
301
00:12:56,100 --> 00:12:57,968
She's gonna be here
in 15 minutes,
302
00:12:58,000 --> 00:13:00,033
and I've convinced her
to talk to you.
303
00:13:00,067 --> 00:13:02,734
I don't think
I can pull this one off.
304
00:13:02,767 --> 00:13:04,067
What's the problem?
305
00:13:04,100 --> 00:13:05,934
I can't talk about it.
It's personal.
306
00:13:05,968 --> 00:13:07,267
If I'm not mistaken,
307
00:13:07,300 --> 00:13:09,601
that sounds
like a cry for Carter.
308
00:13:09,634 --> 00:13:12,067
We're gonna need a second.
Charlie...
309
00:13:15,367 --> 00:13:19,834
Let's talk about this
as a group.
310
00:13:19,868 --> 00:13:22,701
The truth is, there are parts
of our relationship
311
00:13:22,734 --> 00:13:23,667
I don't remember.
312
00:13:23,701 --> 00:13:24,734
Which parts?
313
00:13:24,767 --> 00:13:27,133
Beginning, middle, end.
314
00:13:27,167 --> 00:13:29,534
Is there anything at all
you remember about this woman?
315
00:13:29,567 --> 00:13:30,834
I don't think so.
316
00:13:30,868 --> 00:13:32,334
Oh, you're such a pig.
317
00:13:32,367 --> 00:13:35,300
Wait!
That's sparking something.
318
00:13:36,667 --> 00:13:38,968
You can forget
someone that hot?
319
00:13:39,000 --> 00:13:42,634
I wonder if I've ever forgotten
a woman I've had sex with.
320
00:13:42,667 --> 00:13:46,534
Why don't you check
your credit-card receipts?
321
00:13:49,601 --> 00:13:51,868
I'm surprised
you had the guts to do this,
322
00:13:51,901 --> 00:13:54,701
considering you broke up with me
by leaving me a note.
323
00:13:54,734 --> 00:13:56,901
I had so many
complicated things to say,
324
00:13:56,934 --> 00:13:58,534
I wanted to write them down.
325
00:13:58,567 --> 00:14:00,868
"Joan...
326
00:14:00,901 --> 00:14:03,133
later."
327
00:14:06,534 --> 00:14:09,601
You had it laminated?
328
00:14:09,634 --> 00:14:10,868
I keep it in my purse
329
00:14:10,901 --> 00:14:12,934
so I'll remember
how much you hurt me...
330
00:14:12,968 --> 00:14:15,501
and we had just gotten back
from that trip to Mexico.
331
00:14:15,534 --> 00:14:17,167
I love acapulco.
332
00:14:17,200 --> 00:14:19,067
We went to canc๏ฟฝn.
333
00:14:19,100 --> 00:14:21,400
At least the weather was great.
334
00:14:21,434 --> 00:14:23,234
It rained all week.
335
00:14:23,267 --> 00:14:26,000
But it gave us a lot of chances
336
00:14:26,033 --> 00:14:29,200
to sit in restaurants
eating...Tacos?
337
00:14:29,234 --> 00:14:30,267
Right.
338
00:14:30,300 --> 00:14:32,200
Yes!
339
00:14:32,234 --> 00:14:35,000
So, Joan, this is great.
340
00:14:35,033 --> 00:14:36,968
I've often thought of Mexico
341
00:14:37,000 --> 00:14:39,634
and the times we've spent
in other places
342
00:14:39,667 --> 00:14:42,567
eating...
Food of that land.
343
00:14:42,601 --> 00:14:44,033
Look, for old time's sake,
344
00:14:44,067 --> 00:14:45,567
could you cut us some slack
345
00:14:45,601 --> 00:14:47,901
and put an end
to this tollbooth strike?
346
00:14:47,934 --> 00:14:50,133
Oh, you like quick,
easy endings, don't you...
347
00:14:50,167 --> 00:14:52,067
like the way you ended
our relationship?
348
00:14:52,100 --> 00:14:53,968
It's not gonna be like that
this time.
349
00:14:54,000 --> 00:14:55,300
What do you want?
350
00:14:55,334 --> 00:14:57,000
I want to know why you left me,
351
00:14:57,033 --> 00:14:59,400
what you were thinking
and feeling when you did,
352
00:14:59,434 --> 00:15:00,934
and what you thought of me.
353
00:15:00,968 --> 00:15:04,968
A lot of that's implied
in here.
354
00:15:05,000 --> 00:15:06,868
You are going
to give me closure!
355
00:15:06,901 --> 00:15:09,033
I need to have
the breakup I never did
356
00:15:09,067 --> 00:15:11,033
so that I can move on
with my life!
357
00:15:11,067 --> 00:15:13,567
Okay, I can do that.
358
00:15:15,133 --> 00:15:16,400
Joan...
359
00:15:16,434 --> 00:15:18,868
I was in a really weird place
back then.
360
00:15:18,901 --> 00:15:21,267
Don't even think of saying,
"it's not you, it's me."
361
00:15:21,300 --> 00:15:25,534
Could you excuse me
for a moment?
362
00:15:25,567 --> 00:15:26,901
Basically, she wants you
363
00:15:26,934 --> 00:15:28,801
to give her
the perfect breakup.
364
00:15:28,834 --> 00:15:30,634
I'm meeting her for dinner
in two hours,
365
00:15:30,667 --> 00:15:32,734
and I need to remember
what happened between us.
366
00:15:32,767 --> 00:15:35,000
You know, sometimes
with amnesia patients
367
00:15:35,033 --> 00:15:36,367
they use shock treatment.
368
00:15:36,400 --> 00:15:38,934
Caitlin,
flash the blouse bunnies!
369
00:15:38,968 --> 00:15:41,667
Stuart!
370
00:15:41,701 --> 00:15:44,300
Did you ever think that
it makes Caitlin uncomfortable
371
00:15:44,334 --> 00:15:46,801
when you constantly draw
attention to her winnebagos?!
372
00:15:46,834 --> 00:15:49,467
Carter!
373
00:15:49,501 --> 00:15:53,334
I'm sorry.
He's rubbing off on me.
374
00:15:53,367 --> 00:15:56,834
You have spent your entire
relationship with this woman
375
00:15:56,868 --> 00:15:58,400
lying and manipulating.
376
00:15:58,434 --> 00:15:59,868
Let's keep that going.
377
00:15:59,901 --> 00:16:02,734
I know exactly the kind of line
women go for.
378
00:16:02,767 --> 00:16:04,300
Wait!
379
00:16:05,267 --> 00:16:07,234
Go!
380
00:16:07,267 --> 00:16:09,300
Tell her, "I left you because
381
00:16:09,334 --> 00:16:12,968
I was afraid I could never be
the man you needed me to be."
382
00:16:13,000 --> 00:16:14,200
Impressive...
383
00:16:14,234 --> 00:16:16,067
it took me the whole weekend
384
00:16:16,100 --> 00:16:18,067
to come up
with "Joan... later."
385
00:16:18,100 --> 00:16:20,167
Oh, what's going on in here?
386
00:16:20,200 --> 00:16:23,467
We're trying to come up
with a good breakup line.
387
00:16:23,501 --> 00:16:25,167
"I'm sleeping
with the gardener.
388
00:16:25,200 --> 00:16:26,868
I'll be taking
half your money"?
389
00:16:28,167 --> 00:16:30,234
No?
390
00:16:30,267 --> 00:16:32,467
Worked on me.
391
00:16:43,067 --> 00:16:44,501
How's he doing?
392
00:16:44,534 --> 00:16:46,167
It's hard to tell.
393
00:16:46,200 --> 00:16:50,367
Look at that loser over there.
394
00:16:50,400 --> 00:16:53,334
He has been ogling you
all night.
395
00:16:53,367 --> 00:16:56,601
Oh, my God!
He sent you over a drink.
396
00:16:56,634 --> 00:16:58,767
Ha! Call the lame police.
397
00:16:58,801 --> 00:17:00,601
That's for you.
398
00:17:00,634 --> 00:17:03,968
Don't save my seat.
399
00:17:05,701 --> 00:17:07,534
When I looked in my heart,
400
00:17:07,567 --> 00:17:11,534
I was afraid I could never be
the man you needed me to be.
401
00:17:11,567 --> 00:17:14,801
That's it?
That's all you've got?
402
00:17:14,834 --> 00:17:19,200
I'm sleeping
with the gardener...
403
00:17:21,567 --> 00:17:25,334
and I'll be taking
half your money.
404
00:17:25,367 --> 00:17:28,601
I don't know what made me think
you could be honest with me!
405
00:17:28,634 --> 00:17:30,501
What about the strike?
406
00:17:30,534 --> 00:17:32,200
You came here
like I asked you to,
407
00:17:32,234 --> 00:17:34,067
so I'm not gonna hold
the city hostage.
408
00:17:34,100 --> 00:17:35,367
Thank you.
409
00:17:35,400 --> 00:17:38,567
You've gotten what you wanted:
New job, new life.
410
00:17:38,601 --> 00:17:41,801
But you know something, Charlie?
You haven't changed.
411
00:17:41,834 --> 00:17:44,767
Wait!
412
00:17:44,801 --> 00:17:47,033
You want me to be honest?
413
00:17:47,067 --> 00:17:48,601
I'll be honest.
414
00:17:48,634 --> 00:17:50,634
I don't remember you.
415
00:17:51,868 --> 00:17:55,200
I don't remember
our relationship.
416
00:17:55,234 --> 00:17:57,367
I barely remember 1994.
417
00:17:57,400 --> 00:17:59,634
I'm still trying to figure out
418
00:17:59,667 --> 00:18:03,400
why I have the words "ace
of base" tattooed on my ass.
419
00:18:05,834 --> 00:18:07,234
Back when you knew me,
420
00:18:07,267 --> 00:18:09,767
I drank heavily,
and I was good at it.
421
00:18:09,801 --> 00:18:11,868
I had groupies and a tour bus,
422
00:18:11,901 --> 00:18:13,868
and I wasn't even in a band.
423
00:18:15,968 --> 00:18:17,701
I know that I hurt
a lot of people,
424
00:18:17,734 --> 00:18:19,567
and you're one of them,
and I'm sorry.
425
00:18:19,601 --> 00:18:22,033
Maybe you're someone
that would've been right for me,
426
00:18:22,067 --> 00:18:24,234
but I'll never know that,
and that's my loss.
427
00:18:25,567 --> 00:18:27,667
Now that I have
everyone's attention,
428
00:18:27,701 --> 00:18:32,400
we're still waiting on rolls.
429
00:18:32,434 --> 00:18:34,434
Thank you.
430
00:18:37,534 --> 00:18:40,234
Call me.
431
00:18:53,667 --> 00:18:55,767
Are you crying?
432
00:18:55,801 --> 00:18:59,667
It's just...
she's so hot...
433
00:18:59,701 --> 00:19:04,133
And he had sex with her.
434
00:19:09,434 --> 00:19:10,400
Hey.
435
00:19:10,434 --> 00:19:11,667
Hey.
436
00:19:11,701 --> 00:19:14,601
I just want to thank you
for talking to Joan.
437
00:19:14,634 --> 00:19:16,901
I know that must've been
really hard for you.
438
00:19:16,934 --> 00:19:19,501
Yeah, it was.
She stuck me with the check.
439
00:19:19,534 --> 00:19:20,634
Joke all you want,
440
00:19:20,667 --> 00:19:22,801
but what you said
was really moving.
441
00:19:22,834 --> 00:19:25,868
I guess... I got numbers
from the waitress, the hostess,
442
00:19:25,901 --> 00:19:28,167
and the guy
that was hitting on Carter.
443
00:19:29,701 --> 00:19:31,400
That's it. You win.
444
00:19:31,434 --> 00:19:33,467
I can't pick a reporter.
445
00:19:33,501 --> 00:19:36,434
I-I'll just clean out
my office.
446
00:19:36,467 --> 00:19:39,067
Paul, the two best guys
are Martin from the post
447
00:19:39,100 --> 00:19:40,934
and Johnson
from the daily news.
448
00:19:40,968 --> 00:19:42,734
Pick one...
go with your gut.
449
00:19:44,801 --> 00:19:46,367
Johnson.
450
00:19:46,400 --> 00:19:47,667
We're going with Johnson.
451
00:19:47,701 --> 00:19:49,634
Congratulations...
you made a decision.
452
00:19:49,667 --> 00:19:52,434
I did.
453
00:19:52,467 --> 00:19:55,667
I made a decision on my own.
454
00:19:55,701 --> 00:19:57,400
I'm decisive.
455
00:19:57,434 --> 00:19:59,167
I'm your guy.
456
00:20:00,868 --> 00:20:03,100
Of course,
I'd have gone with Martin.
457
00:20:03,133 --> 00:20:04,501
Ohhh!
458
00:20:07,434 --> 00:20:09,801
I hear the tollbooth strike
is off.
459
00:20:09,834 --> 00:20:11,100
The morning commute
460
00:20:11,133 --> 00:20:13,801
is gonna be back
to its usual slow crawl.
461
00:20:13,834 --> 00:20:15,367
Another problem solved.
462
00:20:16,701 --> 00:20:18,400
It's moments like this
463
00:20:18,434 --> 00:20:21,267
that make me glad I decided
not to run for the senate.
464
00:20:21,300 --> 00:20:23,133
I love being mayor
of this city.
465
00:20:23,167 --> 00:20:25,300
I love the people.
466
00:20:25,334 --> 00:20:28,267
I love the way the park smells
on a fall day.
467
00:20:28,300 --> 00:20:32,033
I love the free apples you get
outside every Korean market.
468
00:20:32,067 --> 00:20:36,400
Sir...Those aren't free.
469
00:20:36,434 --> 00:20:39,801
Let him go.
470
00:20:39,834 --> 00:20:41,467
Thank you, Caitlin.
471
00:20:41,501 --> 00:20:44,200
You, too, Charlie.
472
00:20:44,234 --> 00:20:46,000
Thank you.
473
00:20:47,567 --> 00:20:48,601
Sir...
474
00:20:50,100 --> 00:20:51,934
you called me Charlie.
475
00:20:51,968 --> 00:20:54,133
Don't let it go
to your head, Mike.
476
00:21:06,400 --> 00:21:09,467
Here's a list of my meetings
for tomorrow.
477
00:21:09,501 --> 00:21:12,334
Did you traumatize
any of these people?
478
00:21:12,367 --> 00:21:14,834
No...No...No.
479
00:21:14,868 --> 00:21:18,868
I'm gonna skip the 3:00.
480
00:21:29,634 --> 00:21:32,100
Sit, ubu, sit. Good dog.34863
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof