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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:10,000 [MUSIC] 2 00:00:10,001 --> 00:00:20,000 [MUSIC] 3 00:00:20,001 --> 00:00:30,000 [MUSIC]. 4 00:00:45,000 --> 00:00:55,000 [MUSIC]. 5 00:01:07,000 --> 00:01:17,000 [MUSIC] 6 00:01:17,001 --> 00:01:34,000 She set it down as soft as a baby duck's bottom. 7 00:01:34,001 --> 00:01:38,000 [MUSIC] 8 00:01:38,001 --> 00:01:39,000 Is everything okay? 9 00:01:39,001 --> 00:01:40,000 >> Yeah, I'm sorry. 10 00:01:40,001 --> 00:01:43,000 Sorry, this is just a little difficult for me. 11 00:01:43,001 --> 00:01:45,000 >> No, no, no, I mean, you don't have to apologize. 12 00:01:45,001 --> 00:01:49,000 I'm just->> It's just, I just got out of this relationship. 13 00:01:49,001 --> 00:01:50,000 >> Really? 14 00:01:50,001 --> 00:01:53,000 >> Well, I didn't just get out, I was kind of gotten out. 15 00:01:53,001 --> 00:01:56,000 All right, all right, I was dumped. 16 00:01:56,001 --> 00:01:59,000 But believe me, it's over with, and it's for the best, and it's really not 17 00:01:59,001 --> 00:02:00,000 worth going into. 18 00:02:00,001 --> 00:02:03,000 So, where were we? 19 00:02:03,001 --> 00:02:07,000 >> Now, wait a second, wait a second, you just got out of a relationship? 20 00:02:07,001 --> 00:02:08,000 What happened? 21 00:02:08,001 --> 00:02:09,000 >> No, I don't know. 22 00:02:09,001 --> 00:02:10,000 Well, I do know, actually. 23 00:02:10,001 --> 00:02:11,000 Ryan's a pig. 24 00:02:11,001 --> 00:02:12,000 >> Ryan? 25 00:02:12,001 --> 00:02:16,000 >> Possessive, pushy, totally insensitive. 26 00:02:16,001 --> 00:02:17,000 >> We hate Ryan. 27 00:02:17,001 --> 00:02:18,000 >> We do. 28 00:02:18,001 --> 00:02:22,000 >> I can't see why anyone would possibly want to dump you. 29 00:02:22,001 --> 00:02:23,000 >> You haven't seen Elaine. 30 00:02:23,001 --> 00:02:25,301 We really hate Elaine, especially her 31 00:02:25,313 --> 00:02:28,000 16-inch waist and her perky little breasts. 32 00:02:28,001 --> 00:02:30,000 >> I mean, no wonder we hate her. 33 00:02:30,001 --> 00:02:33,000 >> Anyway, I'm fine, I'm fine. 34 00:02:33,001 --> 00:02:36,000 Just sort of dealing with it. 35 00:02:36,001 --> 00:02:41,000 >> Well, you know, if all this is going too fast for you, I mean, we don't 36 00:02:41,001 --> 00:02:42,000 have to rush things. 37 00:02:42,001 --> 00:02:44,000 >> Would that be okay? 38 00:02:44,001 --> 00:02:46,000 >> No, absolutely not. 39 00:02:46,001 --> 00:02:47,000 >> Sure. 40 00:02:47,001 --> 00:02:50,000 I mean, come on, you know, I'm not this Ryan. 41 00:02:50,001 --> 00:02:52,000 >> No, you're not. 42 00:02:52,001 --> 00:02:56,000 You're much more sensitive. 43 00:02:56,001 --> 00:02:59,000 >> I'm a sensitive guy. 44 00:02:59,001 --> 00:03:04,000 [ Music ] 45 00:03:04,001 --> 00:03:10,000 >> I will never say that I was false apart, though absence seemed my flame. 46 00:03:10,001 --> 00:03:13,000 Do qualify. 47 00:03:13,001 --> 00:03:16,840 As easy might I from my self depart, as 48 00:03:16,852 --> 00:03:21,000 from my soul, which in my breast doth lie. 49 00:03:25,000 --> 00:03:29,000 >> Sometimes you can even see Venus. 50 00:03:29,001 --> 00:03:30,000 >> Yeah. 51 00:03:30,001 --> 00:03:36,000 >> It's beautiful when there's a full moon out. 52 00:03:36,001 --> 00:03:38,000 >> That's a B. 53 00:03:38,001 --> 00:03:43,000 >> Right. 54 00:03:43,001 --> 00:03:46,000 >> R. Hitler. 55 00:03:46,001 --> 00:03:51,000 >> Just wanted to see if you were paying attention. 56 00:03:51,001 --> 00:03:53,000 >> Martin. 57 00:03:53,001 --> 00:03:54,000 >> Yeah. 58 00:03:54,001 --> 00:03:56,000 >> Unless you want to do another word. 59 00:03:56,001 --> 00:04:04,000 I was thinking we could maybe go to bed. 60 00:04:04,001 --> 00:04:05,000 >> Go on. 61 00:04:05,001 --> 00:04:06,000 You heard her. 62 00:04:06,001 --> 00:04:07,000 Jump. 63 00:04:07,001 --> 00:04:08,000 Don't think. 64 00:04:08,001 --> 00:04:29,000 [ Music ] 65 00:04:29,001 --> 00:04:32,000 >> So you scored with the sensitive thing. 66 00:04:32,001 --> 00:04:34,000 >> No, no, I didn't score with the sensitive thing. 67 00:04:34,001 --> 00:04:36,000 >> Man, there's nothing to be embarrassed about. 68 00:04:36,001 --> 00:04:38,000 >> I mean, I've done very well with the sensitive thing. 69 00:04:38,001 --> 00:04:40,000 >> Oh, you know what works great? 70 00:04:40,001 --> 00:04:43,000 Buy one of those Victorian novels from those used bookstores. 71 00:04:43,001 --> 00:04:46,000 Eddie, I'm not doing a thing, okay? 72 00:04:46,001 --> 00:04:47,770 I just met this wonderful woman who's coming 73 00:04:47,782 --> 00:04:49,441 off of a bad relationship and I'm just--. 74 00:04:50,000 --> 00:04:52,000 [ Music ] 75 00:04:52,001 --> 00:04:53,000 >> Being sensitive to them. 76 00:04:53,001 --> 00:04:55,000 >> Okay, okay, it wasn't fair. 77 00:04:55,001 --> 00:04:56,000 It's not a sensitive thing. 78 00:04:56,001 --> 00:04:57,000 >> Thank you. 79 00:04:57,001 --> 00:04:59,000 >> It's a rebound thing. 80 00:04:59,001 --> 00:05:00,000 >> Could we just drop it, okay? 81 00:05:00,001 --> 00:05:01,000 >> No, no, no, it's great. 82 00:05:01,001 --> 00:05:02,000 It's great. 83 00:05:02,001 --> 00:05:05,000 For the next four weeks, everything you do is going to be perfect. 84 00:05:05,001 --> 00:05:06,000 Why? 85 00:05:06,001 --> 00:05:08,000 Because you're not the other guy. 86 00:05:08,001 --> 00:05:10,000 >> Classic rebound. 87 00:05:10,001 --> 00:05:11,000 >> It's bullshit. 88 00:05:11,001 --> 00:05:12,000 >> It's bullshit. 89 00:05:12,001 --> 00:05:13,000 >> She likes me for who I am. 90 00:05:13,001 --> 00:05:14,000 >> Maybe. 91 00:05:14,001 --> 00:05:15,000 >> But she likes you more for who you're not. 92 00:05:15,001 --> 00:05:17,000 >> Could we just have our lunch? 93 00:05:17,001 --> 00:05:18,000 >> I'm just saying, take advantage of it. 94 00:05:18,001 --> 00:05:21,000 Because in about four weeks, she's going to get over the other guy. 95 00:05:21,001 --> 00:05:25,000 And then you're just going to be you. 96 00:05:25,001 --> 00:05:26,000 >> Well, thanks for clearing that up. 97 00:05:26,001 --> 00:05:28,000 Thank you very much. 98 00:05:28,001 --> 00:05:33,000 [ Music ] 99 00:05:33,001 --> 00:05:36,000 >> That's not very sensitive. 100 00:05:36,001 --> 00:05:46,000 [ Music ] 101 00:05:46,001 --> 00:05:47,000 >> Hi, can I help you? 102 00:05:47,001 --> 00:05:51,000 >> Oh, uh, I was looking for Stephanie. 103 00:05:51,001 --> 00:05:53,000 >> Oh, she's not back yet. 104 00:05:53,001 --> 00:05:54,000 It's Wednesday. 105 00:05:54,001 --> 00:05:57,000 She probably stopped at the farmer's market in Union Square. 106 00:05:57,001 --> 00:05:58,000 Come on in. 107 00:05:58,001 --> 00:05:59,000 >> Thanks. 108 00:05:59,001 --> 00:06:00,000 >> Oh, look. 109 00:06:00,001 --> 00:06:02,000 >> Weathering heights. 110 00:06:02,001 --> 00:06:03,000 >> Yeah. 111 00:06:03,001 --> 00:06:05,000 Hope she doesn't already have it. 112 00:06:05,001 --> 00:06:07,000 >> Victorian novels, huh? 113 00:06:07,001 --> 00:06:08,000 La la. 114 00:06:08,001 --> 00:06:10,000 >> You know what? 115 00:06:10,001 --> 00:06:12,000 Stephanie never told me she had a roommate. 116 00:06:12,001 --> 00:06:13,000 >> Oh, I don't live here anymore. 117 00:06:13,001 --> 00:06:16,000 I just never gave back my key. 118 00:06:16,001 --> 00:06:17,000 I'm Ryan. 119 00:06:17,001 --> 00:06:18,000 >> Ryan? 120 00:06:18,001 --> 00:06:19,000 That's funny. 121 00:06:19,001 --> 00:06:22,000 Stephanie used to go out with a gun and skip her. 122 00:06:22,001 --> 00:06:23,000 Am I right? 123 00:06:23,001 --> 00:06:25,000 >> Hey, you figured it out, Red. 124 00:06:25,001 --> 00:06:28,000 >> Nice to meet you, Ryan. 125 00:06:28,001 --> 00:06:30,000 How do you love a woman? 126 00:06:30,001 --> 00:06:31,000 >> Do. 127 00:06:31,001 --> 00:06:34,000 >> And who did you say you were again? 128 00:06:34,001 --> 00:06:36,000 >> I'm Martin Tupper. 129 00:06:36,001 --> 00:06:37,000 I'm the guy. 130 00:06:37,001 --> 00:06:39,000 Stephanie's seeing you now. 131 00:06:39,001 --> 00:06:40,000 >> Huh. 132 00:06:40,001 --> 00:06:41,000 Well. 133 00:06:41,001 --> 00:06:44,000 Well, well, well. 134 00:06:44,001 --> 00:06:48,000 >> Is it possible that I am not wanted in this plot joint? 135 00:06:48,001 --> 00:06:49,000 Undoubtedly. 136 00:06:49,001 --> 00:06:51,000 >> Oh, Martin. 137 00:06:51,001 --> 00:06:53,000 >> Stephanie. 138 00:06:53,001 --> 00:06:56,000 >> Ryan, what are you doing here? 139 00:06:56,001 --> 00:06:58,000 >> I'm meeting Martin. 140 00:06:58,001 --> 00:07:00,000 He brought you a book. 141 00:07:00,001 --> 00:07:01,000 It's Wuthering Heights. 142 00:07:01,001 --> 00:07:03,000 >> Thank you, Ryan. 143 00:07:03,001 --> 00:07:04,000 This is for you. 144 00:07:04,001 --> 00:07:05,000 >> Thank you, Martin. 145 00:07:05,001 --> 00:07:09,000 I've always wanted to read this book. 146 00:07:09,001 --> 00:07:14,000 So, Stephanie, you're going out with a guy. 147 00:07:14,001 --> 00:07:16,000 >> Is that like your business, Ryan? 148 00:07:16,001 --> 00:07:20,000 >> She did tell you she was a lesbian, didn't she? 149 00:07:20,001 --> 00:07:25,000 >> Hey, I can tell you from firsthand experience that Stephanie is not a -- 150 00:07:25,001 --> 00:07:26,000 >> A lesbian? 151 00:07:26,001 --> 00:07:31,000 >> Is that a hard word for you to say, lesbian? 152 00:07:31,001 --> 00:07:32,000 >> Don't label me Ryan. 153 00:07:32,001 --> 00:07:34,000 >> Listen, Stephanie, we got to talk. 154 00:07:34,001 --> 00:07:35,000 >> Okay. 155 00:07:35,001 --> 00:07:36,000 Well, no. 156 00:07:36,001 --> 00:07:38,000 I have nothing to say to you. 157 00:07:38,001 --> 00:07:41,000 >> I broke up with Elaine. 158 00:07:41,001 --> 00:07:42,000 >> Really? 159 00:07:42,001 --> 00:07:43,000 I'm sorry. 160 00:07:43,001 --> 00:07:45,000 She was so pretty and stupid. 161 00:07:45,001 --> 00:07:46,000 >> You're right. 162 00:07:46,001 --> 00:07:48,000 She was. 163 00:07:48,001 --> 00:07:50,000 I should never have left you. 164 00:07:50,001 --> 00:07:51,000 >> But you did. 165 00:07:51,001 --> 00:07:53,000 And I'm with Martin now. 166 00:07:53,001 --> 00:07:54,000 And I'm very happy. 167 00:07:54,001 --> 00:07:56,000 >> So, then, that's it. 168 00:07:56,001 --> 00:07:57,000 Thanks for stopping by. 169 00:07:57,001 --> 00:07:58,000 >> Now, are you going? 170 00:07:58,001 --> 00:08:03,000 Or are you going to wait and be kicked out? 171 00:08:03,001 --> 00:08:04,000 >> Bye-bye now. 172 00:08:04,001 --> 00:08:06,000 >> You're just trying to get back at me for Elaine. 173 00:08:06,001 --> 00:08:07,000 >> Oh, I am not. 174 00:08:07,001 --> 00:08:08,000 >> Then you're doing this for Donna. 175 00:08:08,001 --> 00:08:09,000 >> Oh, my God. 176 00:08:09,001 --> 00:08:10,000 Who's Donna? 177 00:08:10,001 --> 00:08:11,000 >> Donna's my mother. 178 00:08:11,001 --> 00:08:14,000 Come on, Steph. 179 00:08:14,001 --> 00:08:16,000 I know I screwed up. 180 00:08:16,001 --> 00:08:18,000 Don't do this. 181 00:08:18,001 --> 00:08:20,000 >> She asked you to leave. 182 00:08:20,001 --> 00:08:22,000 >> Oh, okay. 183 00:08:22,001 --> 00:08:23,000 Fine. 184 00:08:23,001 --> 00:08:35,000 I'll just leave you kids to your heterosexual fun. 185 00:08:35,001 --> 00:08:37,000 >> Well, she's a hell of a guy. 186 00:08:37,001 --> 00:08:39,000 >> I never said she was a guy. 187 00:08:39,001 --> 00:08:41,000 >> You also never said she was a she. 188 00:08:41,001 --> 00:08:42,000 >> What was only the second date? 189 00:08:42,001 --> 00:08:43,000 >> Oh, I'm sorry. 190 00:08:43,001 --> 00:08:45,000 And your gay lover is more of a now we're getting married, 191 00:08:45,001 --> 00:08:47,000 you should know type of thing. 192 00:08:47,001 --> 00:08:48,000 >> I'm sorry. 193 00:08:48,001 --> 00:08:49,000 I didn't know how to tell you. 194 00:08:49,001 --> 00:08:52,000 It's hard to know how to explain it to, you know, a man. 195 00:08:52,001 --> 00:08:55,000 I guess I thought you might be threatened. 196 00:08:55,001 --> 00:08:57,000 >> Threatened? 197 00:08:57,001 --> 00:08:59,000 >> Mm-hmm. 198 00:08:59,001 --> 00:09:00,000 >> I'm not threatened. 199 00:09:00,001 --> 00:09:01,000 >> Mm-hmm. 200 00:09:01,001 --> 00:09:03,000 >> I just wish I'd known. 201 00:09:03,001 --> 00:09:04,000 That's all. 202 00:09:04,001 --> 00:09:05,000 >> Mm-hmm. 203 00:09:05,001 --> 00:09:07,000 >> It's no big deal. 204 00:09:07,001 --> 00:09:08,000 >> Really? 205 00:09:08,001 --> 00:09:10,000 >> Really. 206 00:09:10,001 --> 00:09:14,000 You're threatened. 207 00:09:14,001 --> 00:09:26,000 [ Music ] 208 00:09:26,001 --> 00:09:29,000 [ Sighs ] 209 00:09:29,001 --> 00:09:35,000 [ Grunting ] 210 00:09:35,001 --> 00:09:36,000 I'm sorry. 211 00:09:36,001 --> 00:09:38,000 I'm sorry. 212 00:09:38,001 --> 00:09:39,000 I just need a little air. 213 00:09:39,001 --> 00:09:40,000 >> Martin, it's okay. 214 00:09:40,001 --> 00:09:42,000 You don't have to -- >> No, no, no. 215 00:09:42,001 --> 00:09:43,000 No, this is great. 216 00:09:43,001 --> 00:09:46,000 I'll see you in a bit. 217 00:09:46,001 --> 00:09:51,000 >> Now that I'm here and see what's to be had, I shall dally in the valley. 218 00:09:51,001 --> 00:09:53,000 And believe me, I can dally. 219 00:09:53,001 --> 00:09:54,000 >> Mm. 220 00:09:54,001 --> 00:09:58,000 Martin, you've been down there for three hours. 221 00:09:58,001 --> 00:09:59,000 >> No, no, it's okay. 222 00:09:59,001 --> 00:10:01,000 I'm enjoying this. 223 00:10:01,001 --> 00:10:02,000 >> Six times is enough. 224 00:10:02,001 --> 00:10:04,000 I'm going blind. 225 00:10:04,001 --> 00:10:05,000 >> I just want to make sure you feel good. 226 00:10:05,001 --> 00:10:07,000 >> I can't feel anything anymore. 227 00:10:07,001 --> 00:10:09,000 >> He's got a dill picking for a tongue, 228 00:10:09,001 --> 00:10:12,000 and some day somebody's going to slap the lid down on him. 229 00:10:12,001 --> 00:10:16,000 [ Sighs ] 230 00:10:16,001 --> 00:10:18,000 >> That was wonderful. 231 00:10:18,001 --> 00:10:19,000 >> Really? 232 00:10:19,001 --> 00:10:20,000 >> You couldn't tell? 233 00:10:20,001 --> 00:10:22,000 I think the neighbors know. 234 00:10:22,001 --> 00:10:27,000 >> Well, I just -- [ Groans ] 235 00:10:27,001 --> 00:10:31,000 I just wanted to, you know, do the things you liked. 236 00:10:31,001 --> 00:10:34,000 >> Well, I did like them. 237 00:10:34,001 --> 00:10:37,000 And I also liked what we did the other night. 238 00:10:37,001 --> 00:10:41,000 >> Good, good, you know, 'cause that worked for me, too. 239 00:10:41,001 --> 00:10:43,000 >> Martin, I've always liked sex with men. 240 00:10:43,001 --> 00:10:45,000 That's not why I was with a woman. 241 00:10:45,001 --> 00:10:47,000 >> It's not? 242 00:10:47,001 --> 00:10:50,000 Uh, what was it? 243 00:10:50,001 --> 00:10:54,000 >> Well, you know, it was all the other things. 244 00:10:54,001 --> 00:10:56,000 >> Oh, sure. 245 00:10:56,001 --> 00:10:59,000 >> Stephanie, do you want to exercise with me? 246 00:10:59,001 --> 00:11:00,000 >> What other things? 247 00:11:00,001 --> 00:11:02,000 >> Everything. 248 00:11:02,001 --> 00:11:03,000 It's hard to explain. 249 00:11:03,001 --> 00:11:05,000 >> Could you try? 250 00:11:05,001 --> 00:11:10,000 >> Well, women talk to each other. 251 00:11:10,001 --> 00:11:11,000 I talk. 252 00:11:11,001 --> 00:11:12,000 I talk all the time. 253 00:11:12,001 --> 00:11:14,000 >> I know, but it's not the same thing. 254 00:11:14,001 --> 00:11:16,000 I mean, women listen. 255 00:11:16,001 --> 00:11:17,000 >> I listen. 256 00:11:17,001 --> 00:11:18,000 Look, I'm listening right now. 257 00:11:18,001 --> 00:11:20,000 I'm talking and I'm listening. 258 00:11:20,001 --> 00:11:25,000 >> And I can share and I can express my feelings and -- >> I can even cry. 259 00:11:25,001 --> 00:11:27,000 I mean, under certain circumstances. 260 00:11:27,001 --> 00:11:28,000 >> I know. 261 00:11:28,001 --> 00:11:30,000 I know you can, but it's different. 262 00:11:30,001 --> 00:11:33,000 I mean, when you were someone who's like you, 263 00:11:33,001 --> 00:11:39,000 there's a connection, you know, comfort and ease. 264 00:11:39,001 --> 00:11:40,000 You know what it's like? 265 00:11:40,001 --> 00:11:43,000 It's like when you're with Eddie. 266 00:11:43,001 --> 00:11:44,000 >> Oh. 267 00:11:44,001 --> 00:11:46,000 Oh, yeah. 268 00:11:46,001 --> 00:11:50,000 No, no, no, no, no. 269 00:11:50,001 --> 00:11:52,000 No, it's not like that at all. 270 00:11:52,001 --> 00:11:56,000 I mean, no, Eddie may have -- No, no, no, it's not the same thing. 271 00:11:56,001 --> 00:11:58,000 >> I don't think so. 272 00:11:58,001 --> 00:11:59,000 >> No, no, no. 273 00:11:59,001 --> 00:12:00,000 >> A lesbian? 274 00:12:00,001 --> 00:12:03,000 >> No, no, she's not a lesbian. 275 00:12:03,001 --> 00:12:05,000 >> Martin, she sleeps with women. 276 00:12:05,001 --> 00:12:08,000 >> Yeah, yeah, but she sleeps with men, too. 277 00:12:08,001 --> 00:12:11,000 >> Okay, so what you're saying is she's a part-time lesbian. 278 00:12:11,001 --> 00:12:12,000 >> No. 279 00:12:12,001 --> 00:12:13,000 Come on. 280 00:12:13,001 --> 00:12:16,000 Look, we all have a masculine feminine side, right? 281 00:12:16,001 --> 00:12:17,000 >> Not me. 282 00:12:17,001 --> 00:12:18,000 >> Sure you do. 283 00:12:18,001 --> 00:12:19,000 Come on. 284 00:12:19,001 --> 00:12:20,000 We all do. 285 00:12:20,001 --> 00:12:21,000 I have a feminine side. 286 00:12:21,001 --> 00:12:23,000 >> Martin, is there something you're trying to tell me? 287 00:12:23,001 --> 00:12:24,000 >> No, no, no. 288 00:12:24,001 --> 00:12:27,000 As it happens, my feminine side is attracted to women. 289 00:12:27,001 --> 00:12:31,000 >> So what you're saying is you're a lesbian. 290 00:12:31,001 --> 00:12:33,000 >> Don't you care what anyone says, Mr. Gregg? 291 00:12:33,001 --> 00:12:34,000 You wear it. 292 00:12:34,001 --> 00:12:35,321 >> And I'm comfortable with that. 293 00:12:36,000 --> 00:12:42,000 [ Music ] 294 00:12:42,001 --> 00:12:43,000 >> Hi. 295 00:12:43,001 --> 00:12:44,000 >> Hi. 296 00:12:44,001 --> 00:12:46,000 >> You okay? 297 00:12:46,001 --> 00:12:47,000 >> Yeah, I'm fine. 298 00:12:47,001 --> 00:12:48,000 Come on in. 299 00:12:48,001 --> 00:12:53,000 >> What's -- >> Hi, Martin. 300 00:12:53,001 --> 00:12:55,000 >> What are you doing here, Ryan? 301 00:12:55,001 --> 00:12:57,000 >> Martin, it's okay. 302 00:12:57,001 --> 00:12:58,000 Everything's fine. 303 00:12:58,001 --> 00:13:02,000 Ryan and I finally talk things over, and we're going to put everything 304 00:13:02,001 --> 00:13:04,000 behind us and just be friends. 305 00:13:04,001 --> 00:13:05,000 >> Great. 306 00:13:05,001 --> 00:13:06,000 That's great. 307 00:13:06,001 --> 00:13:09,000 >> I know you're still mad at her because she was such a pig when you first 308 00:13:09,001 --> 00:13:11,000 met, but that's over with. 309 00:13:11,001 --> 00:13:14,000 >> Yes, it's over with, I promise. 310 00:13:14,001 --> 00:13:17,000 Friends. 311 00:13:17,001 --> 00:13:20,000 >> Sure. 312 00:13:20,001 --> 00:13:21,000 >> Sure. 313 00:13:21,001 --> 00:13:24,000 >> I'm just going to go fix my face. 314 00:13:24,001 --> 00:13:26,000 It'll only be a minute. 315 00:13:26,001 --> 00:13:28,000 >> Okay. 316 00:13:28,001 --> 00:13:29,000 >> Bye. 317 00:13:29,001 --> 00:13:35,000 >> So, Ryan, are you from New York? 318 00:13:35,001 --> 00:13:37,000 >> Look, I'm going to get her back, you know. 319 00:13:37,001 --> 00:13:39,000 >> Excuse me? 320 00:13:39,001 --> 00:13:41,000 >> I am getting her back. 321 00:13:41,001 --> 00:13:47,000 >> Not a chance. 322 00:13:47,001 --> 00:13:49,000 >> Oh, my God. 323 00:13:49,001 --> 00:13:50,000 >> What? 324 00:13:50,001 --> 00:13:53,000 >> I can't believe they killed Kathy. 325 00:13:53,001 --> 00:13:55,000 How could they kill Kathy? 326 00:13:55,001 --> 00:13:58,000 God, those Bronte sisters were twisted. 327 00:13:58,001 --> 00:14:01,000 Are you coming out of there? 328 00:14:01,001 --> 00:14:07,000 What? 329 00:14:07,001 --> 00:14:10,000 >> Madam, you have no idea what you have missed. 330 00:14:10,001 --> 00:14:13,000 And what delights await you? 331 00:14:13,001 --> 00:14:21,000 >> You came for a show, my friends, and you shall have it. 332 00:14:21,001 --> 00:14:33,000 [MUSIC] 333 00:14:33,001 --> 00:14:35,000 >> Is it my perfume? 334 00:14:35,001 --> 00:14:36,000 >> Mm. 335 00:14:36,001 --> 00:14:46,000 [MUSIC] 336 00:14:46,001 --> 00:14:54,000 >> Hey! 337 00:14:54,001 --> 00:15:04,000 >> [SOUND] 338 00:15:04,001 --> 00:15:12,000 >> Oh, weird. 339 00:15:12,001 --> 00:15:20,000 How did -- what was -- >> Uh, that? 340 00:15:20,001 --> 00:15:28,000 In the morning, you want to go to Zay bars and get some locks? 341 00:15:28,001 --> 00:15:29,000 >> No, I can't. 342 00:15:29,001 --> 00:15:32,000 I told Ryan I'd have brunch with her tomorrow. 343 00:15:32,001 --> 00:15:34,000 >> Yeah, Ryan again, huh? 344 00:15:34,001 --> 00:15:36,000 >> Well, I'm sorry. 345 00:15:36,001 --> 00:15:39,000 I would have invited you, but I don't think you'd want to come. 346 00:15:39,001 --> 00:15:41,000 >> Oh, well, now we've got each other. 347 00:15:41,001 --> 00:15:45,000 >> Look, I really think I should be there. 348 00:15:45,001 --> 00:15:50,000 I mean, you know, it'll give Ryan a chance to get used to the idea of us. 349 00:15:50,001 --> 00:15:59,000 >> Whether a man likes it or not, sometimes he has to do what he has to do. 350 00:15:59,001 --> 00:16:09,000 [MUSIC] 351 00:16:09,001 --> 00:16:12,000 >> There you go. 352 00:16:12,001 --> 00:16:13,000 >> Thank you. 353 00:16:13,001 --> 00:16:16,000 You are so incredible for being here. 354 00:16:16,001 --> 00:16:17,000 >> He's all in hell. 355 00:16:17,001 --> 00:16:20,000 >> I wanted to, really. 356 00:16:20,001 --> 00:16:23,000 >> Stephanie. 357 00:16:23,001 --> 00:16:25,000 Ryan, hi. 358 00:16:25,001 --> 00:16:27,000 >> All the teams are lining up now. 359 00:16:27,001 --> 00:16:29,000 The game is about to start. 360 00:16:29,001 --> 00:16:30,000 >> Hello, Martin. 361 00:16:30,001 --> 00:16:33,000 >> By the way, how is your ping pong? 362 00:16:33,001 --> 00:16:35,000 >> Hello, Ryan. 363 00:16:35,001 --> 00:16:36,000 >> Hi, how's yours? 364 00:16:36,001 --> 00:16:37,000 You want to make anything out of it? 365 00:16:37,001 --> 00:16:38,000 >> Nice tie. 366 00:16:38,001 --> 00:16:39,000 >> Thank you. 367 00:16:39,001 --> 00:16:40,916 >> I was hoping you'd wear an article of 368 00:16:40,928 --> 00:16:43,000 clothing that points towards your genitals. 369 00:16:43,001 --> 00:16:44,000 >> Ryan. 370 00:16:44,001 --> 00:16:45,000 >> What's the matter, Ryan? 371 00:16:45,001 --> 00:16:46,000 >> Mm-hmm. 372 00:16:46,001 --> 00:16:47,000 >> Die, envy? 373 00:16:47,001 --> 00:16:49,000 >> God, I'm starving. 374 00:16:49,001 --> 00:16:50,000 >> Me too. 375 00:16:50,001 --> 00:16:53,000 [MUSIC] 376 00:16:53,001 --> 00:16:54,000 >> Hey. 377 00:16:54,001 --> 00:16:56,000 Is that my sweater? 378 00:16:56,001 --> 00:16:57,000 >> I don't think so. 379 00:16:57,001 --> 00:16:59,000 >> Oh, I think it is. 380 00:16:59,001 --> 00:17:01,000 Remember my sister gave me the sweater? 381 00:17:01,001 --> 00:17:02,000 >> You're lying. 382 00:17:02,001 --> 00:17:03,000 >> You know something? 383 00:17:03,001 --> 00:17:05,000 Why don't you keep it? 384 00:17:05,001 --> 00:17:07,000 It always looked better on you anyway. 385 00:17:07,001 --> 00:17:08,000 >> You what? 386 00:17:08,001 --> 00:17:10,000 You crud. 387 00:17:10,001 --> 00:17:11,000 >> She steals my sweaters too. 388 00:17:11,001 --> 00:17:13,000 My shirts, my socks. 389 00:17:13,001 --> 00:17:14,000 My entire wardrobe. 390 00:17:14,001 --> 00:17:17,000 >> If anyone sees the waiter, I don't have a napkin. 391 00:17:17,001 --> 00:17:19,000 >> Oh, here, here, take mine. 392 00:17:19,001 --> 00:17:20,000 >> No, no, no, take mine. 393 00:17:20,001 --> 00:17:21,000 And still fold her. 394 00:17:21,001 --> 00:17:23,000 [MUSIC] 395 00:17:23,001 --> 00:17:27,000 And... >> Okay, let's order. 396 00:17:27,001 --> 00:17:29,000 >> The specials are right over here. 397 00:17:29,001 --> 00:17:31,000 Oh, honey, your tag is out there. 398 00:17:31,001 --> 00:17:32,000 >> Oh. 399 00:17:32,001 --> 00:17:35,000 Well, now you're messing up her collar. 400 00:17:35,001 --> 00:17:38,000 >> Hold your-- >> Yeah! 401 00:17:38,001 --> 00:17:40,000 We're going. 402 00:17:40,001 --> 00:17:41,000 >> Did you guys stop? 403 00:17:41,001 --> 00:17:42,000 I'm sorry. 404 00:17:42,001 --> 00:17:44,000 >> No problem. 405 00:17:44,001 --> 00:17:47,000 >> Oh, wow. 406 00:17:47,001 --> 00:17:49,000 $10.50 for Caesar's salad. 407 00:17:49,001 --> 00:17:50,000 >> You just order whatever you like. 408 00:17:50,001 --> 00:17:51,000 >> Okay. 409 00:17:51,001 --> 00:17:52,000 >> It's on me. 410 00:17:52,001 --> 00:17:55,000 >> Oh, it's daddy paying for everybody. 411 00:17:55,001 --> 00:17:56,000 >> Ryan. 412 00:17:56,001 --> 00:17:57,000 >> What? 413 00:17:57,001 --> 00:17:58,000 He's acting like your father. 414 00:17:58,001 --> 00:17:59,000 Make up your mind, Martin. 415 00:17:59,001 --> 00:18:01,000 Do you want to fuck her or bounce her on your knee? 416 00:18:01,001 --> 00:18:03,000 >> I just want to buy my girlfriend lunch. 417 00:18:03,001 --> 00:18:05,000 Is that a problem for you? 418 00:18:05,001 --> 00:18:06,000 >> No, no, no. 419 00:18:06,001 --> 00:18:09,000 The problem is you're all over her like a rash. 420 00:18:09,001 --> 00:18:11,040 The problem is you're manly urged to let 421 00:18:11,052 --> 00:18:13,000 everyone in the room know you own her. 422 00:18:13,001 --> 00:18:16,000 It's like you're fucking Balboa and she's the Pacific Ocean. 423 00:18:16,001 --> 00:18:18,000 You're just planting your flag all over the place. 424 00:18:18,001 --> 00:18:19,000 Stop it. 425 00:18:19,001 --> 00:18:20,000 >> Maybe Stephanie likes my flag. 426 00:18:20,001 --> 00:18:21,000 >> Martin, listen. 427 00:18:21,001 --> 00:18:24,000 You can wave your flag around all you like, but you'll never share with 428 00:18:24,001 --> 00:18:26,000 Stephanie the kinds of things I have. 429 00:18:26,001 --> 00:18:27,000 >> You know what? 430 00:18:27,001 --> 00:18:28,000 You're right. 431 00:18:28,001 --> 00:18:29,000 You're absolutely right. 432 00:18:29,001 --> 00:18:30,000 I'm a man. 433 00:18:30,001 --> 00:18:31,000 I'm not a woman. 434 00:18:31,001 --> 00:18:32,000 I'm a man. 435 00:18:32,001 --> 00:18:33,000 I've never had a bikini wax. 436 00:18:33,001 --> 00:18:35,000 I can read a map and I piss standing up. 437 00:18:35,001 --> 00:18:36,000 So what's your point? 438 00:18:36,001 --> 00:18:40,000 >> My point is you're just threatened because we don't need a penis. 439 00:18:40,001 --> 00:18:42,000 >> You sure about that? 440 00:18:42,001 --> 00:18:45,000 >> That's it. 441 00:18:45,001 --> 00:18:51,000 >> Well, here's your napkin. 442 00:18:51,001 --> 00:18:53,000 Have a nice brunch. 443 00:18:53,001 --> 00:18:54,000 >> Stephanie? 444 00:18:54,001 --> 00:18:56,000 >> Stephanie. 445 00:18:56,001 --> 00:19:00,000 >> Well, that's that. 446 00:19:00,001 --> 00:19:01,000 >> Yeah. 447 00:19:01,001 --> 00:19:03,000 I know how you feel. 448 00:19:03,001 --> 00:19:16,000 [ Music ] 449 00:19:16,001 --> 00:19:17,000 >> Shit. 450 00:19:17,001 --> 00:19:19,000 >> Nice to see you, too. 451 00:19:19,001 --> 00:19:21,000 And with flowers, no less. 452 00:19:21,001 --> 00:19:24,000 That's a manly gesture, Martin, but I'm afraid you're too late. 453 00:19:24,001 --> 00:19:25,000 >> Here. 454 00:19:25,001 --> 00:19:26,000 Why don't you just give them to her? 455 00:19:26,001 --> 00:19:27,000 You know what I mean? 456 00:19:27,001 --> 00:19:28,000 I'd hate to see them go to waste. 457 00:19:28,001 --> 00:19:29,000 >> What are you talking about? 458 00:19:29,001 --> 00:19:30,000 I didn't win. 459 00:19:30,001 --> 00:19:32,000 >> Stop busting my balls, will you? 460 00:19:32,001 --> 00:19:34,000 >> I said you were too late. 461 00:19:34,001 --> 00:19:35,000 We're both too late. 462 00:19:35,001 --> 00:19:39,000 Seems she went off to Vermont with somebody named Chris. 463 00:19:39,001 --> 00:19:40,000 >> What? 464 00:19:40,001 --> 00:19:44,000 Who the hell is Chris? 465 00:19:44,001 --> 00:19:46,000 >> I don't know. 466 00:19:46,001 --> 00:19:48,000 >> Mr. or Ms. 467 00:19:48,001 --> 00:19:54,000 >> Tonight we are confronted with a phenomenon that has the leading 468 00:19:54,001 --> 00:19:56,000 scientists of the world completely baffled. 469 00:19:56,001 --> 00:19:58,000 >> I don't believe this. 470 00:19:58,001 --> 00:19:59,000 I don't blame her. 471 00:19:59,001 --> 00:20:00,000 You know, I don't blame her. 472 00:20:00,001 --> 00:20:01,000 I was such a frick. 473 00:20:01,001 --> 00:20:02,000 >> Yeah, me too. 474 00:20:02,001 --> 00:20:03,000 >> Yeah, you were a frick. 475 00:20:03,001 --> 00:20:06,000 I mean, you know, hey, we were both pricks. 476 00:20:06,001 --> 00:20:12,000 >> Well, I guess I'll just go home, throw some stuff, maybe cry a little. 477 00:20:12,001 --> 00:20:15,000 >> Yeah, me too. 478 00:20:15,001 --> 00:20:16,000 See you. 479 00:20:16,001 --> 00:20:17,000 >> Bye. 480 00:20:17,001 --> 00:20:24,000 >> Look, uh, would you like to get a coffee or something? 481 00:20:24,001 --> 00:20:25,000 >> Coffee. 482 00:20:25,001 --> 00:20:26,000 >> Yeah, forget it. 483 00:20:26,001 --> 00:20:27,000 Forget it. 484 00:20:27,001 --> 00:20:28,000 Forget it. 485 00:20:28,001 --> 00:20:29,000 It was a stupid idea. 486 00:20:29,001 --> 00:20:30,000 >> No, no, no, no. 487 00:20:30,001 --> 00:20:31,000 It's a great idea. 488 00:20:31,001 --> 00:20:32,918 But you know, as long as we're doing this 489 00:20:32,930 --> 00:20:35,000 bonding thing, we might as well do it right. 490 00:20:35,001 --> 00:20:37,000 Why not make it a beer? 491 00:20:37,001 --> 00:20:39,000 >> Right out of the bottle. 492 00:20:39,001 --> 00:20:40,000 >> You got it. 493 00:20:40,001 --> 00:20:41,000 >> Excuse me. 494 00:20:41,001 --> 00:20:42,000 I'm sorry. 495 00:20:42,001 --> 00:20:45,000 I'm looking for apartment 6F. 496 00:20:45,001 --> 00:20:49,000 >> Oh, well, it's right at the other end of the hall. 497 00:20:49,001 --> 00:20:50,000 >> Just right down there. 498 00:20:50,001 --> 00:20:51,000 >> Can't miss it. 499 00:20:51,001 --> 00:20:52,000 >> Great. 500 00:20:52,001 --> 00:20:53,000 Thank you. 501 00:20:53,001 --> 00:20:58,000 >> We have much in common, milady. 502 00:20:58,001 --> 00:21:09,000 >> David Letterman talks to actor Martin Lawrence, and that's coming next. 503 00:21:09,001 --> 00:21:10,001 [ Music ]. 504 00:21:11,000 --> 00:21:12,000 [ Music ] 505 00:21:12,001 --> 00:21:22,000 [MUSIC] 506 00:21:22,001 --> 00:21:32,000 [MUSIC] 507 00:21:32,001 --> 00:21:42,000 [MUSIC] 508 00:21:42,001 --> 00:21:52,000 [MUSIC]. 509 00:22:11,000 --> 00:22:21,000 [MUSIC]. 33433

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