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[Theme music]
Theme song: Love, exciting and new, come aboard.
We're expecting you.
And love, life's sweetest reward, let it flow.
It floats back to you.
The love boat soon will be making another run.
The love boat promises something for everyone.
Set a course for adventure, your mind on a new romance.
And love, won't hurt anymore.
It's an open smile on a friendly shore.
It's love.
Welcome aboard, it's love.
[Music playing]
[Horn tooting]
[Hooting and hollering]
Hot dog!
This is what I call the ok corral.
[Hooting]
[Horn tooting]
Julie, did you book a rodeo on this cruise without telling me?
No, sir, that's just a bunch of fun-loving texans
out to have a good old time.
[Hooting and hollering]
Well, come on, my little buckaroos.
Let's lasso some lassies.
[Horn tooting]
Somehow I don't think we'll be seeing
them a your bridge tournament.
Have a nice cruise.
Dr. Bricker?
Hi.
Carlene glover, reporting for sea duty.
Carlene glover, you must be the nurse the line
said they were sending.
That's me, carlene glover, registered nurse.
Have thermometer, will travel.
Hey, fellas, here's somebody I'd like you to meet.
Carlene glover, this is gopher Smith, Isaac Washington.
Hello.
Hello.
Carlene's a nurse.
She's here to give the entire ship's
company physical examinations.
What?
Since when do we need physical examinations?
Oh, it's a new company policy.
But I'm sure you got nothing to worry about.
Now, carlene, if there's anything you need,
don't hesitate to give me a call.
I'll show you my office, help you get set up.
Oh, thanks, doc.
But I wouldn't want to bother you.
But I'm sure it wouldn't be any bother for Isaac.
Would it?
Uh, uh, no.
It's all right.
Sure.
Hey, you two, no physicals until
the official starting time.
Do we really have to take a physical?
Don't worry about it.
You look real healthy to me, sugar.
See you later, sugar.
Would you like one lump or two?
See you later.
Carter.
Julie, hi.
Julie.
Muffy, hi.
Hi.
Captain stubing, Vicki, I'd like you to meet
my cousin, Carter Randall.
Well, how do you do?
Good.
And this is his childhood sweetheart, muffy.
- Hello. - Welcome aboard.
I'm sure you'll enjoy the cruise.
If you'll excuse us.
Oh, Carter, why didn't you tell me you were coming.
We wanted to surprise you.
And we've got another surprise.
We're getting married when the ship docks in acapulco.
Oh, congratulations.
That's terrific.
Thanks.
Gee, it didn't occur to me.
You're the c. Randall on promenade 350.
And muffy, you're right next door, 352.
That's just until after the wedding.
Then those cabin arrangements are going to change.
She's going to be in 350, and I'm going to be in 352.
I think we'll see you later.
Yeah.
Glad you two are finally getting married.
So are we.
Bye.
Julie, you've got to get me out of this wedding.
You've got to.
I'm desperate.
I don't see him.
Maybe he got stuck in traffic.
Oh, Debbie.
Is your fiance going to be late for the wedding, too?
Mom, he'll be here.
And you're going to love him.
That's and order.
And what if I don't?
Well, then I'll just have to marry him anyway.
Oh, I was afraid of that.
I'll go check us in.
All right, love.
[Music playing]
Millicent?
Ted?
Oh.
I can't believe it.
It's been almost a quarter of a century.
There must be a kinder way of putting it.
Millicent holton, the first woman I ever fell in love with.
And Ted Anderson, the first man who ever broke my heart.
Well, if I'd know you were going to stay so pretty,
I'd have never let you get away.
I kept trying to tell you, but you wouldn't listen.
Ed, hi, sweetheart.
Well, I see you've already met my mom.
So, what do you think of your future son-in-law?
Well, I will have to get to know him.
We just met.
Well, don't you worry.
I'm sure that you'll learn to love him as much as I do.
[Ship's horn blowing]
[Music playing]
I don't know about this physical.
I don't like strangers poking around my body.
Since when?
If you're real good and promise not to cry,
I'll see you get an extra lollipop.
Next.
That's me.
Sit right down here.
I'll be with you in a minute, Isaac, honey.
Oh, Isaac, you know I've got some free time coming up.
And I would just love you to show me around the ship.
Well there really isn't that much to see.
You know, you've seen one ship, you've seen them all.
But I haven't seen one ship yet.
This will be my first.
What about four o'clock?
Isaac: Four o'clock, well that's my busiest time.
Oh. Five.
Isaac: That's even busier than my busiest time.
Six?
Isaac: Sorry, I'm busy.
(Screaming) Aaaaa!
Sorry.
Are you ok?
No, no, no, no problem.
Don't even worry about it.
Didn't hurt a bit.
Your turn, Isaac.
I guess that's the last you'll see of him.
Oh, don't worry.
I mean, he can't go too far unless he's part tuna.
[Music playing]
Wee!
Whoop!
Hey!
[Horn tooting]
Whoa, darling.
Hey, I like that bathing suit you don't have on.
[Horn tooting]
[Hooting and hollering]
Julie, thanks for meeting me here.
I told muffy I need a breath of fresh air.
Hey, Carter, what's the problem with you two?
Julie, I just can't go through with this marriage.
Why?
Muffy's such a nice girl.
That's exactly the problem.
I can't face a lifetime of nice.
Well, it sure beats a lifetime of nasty.
Julie, you don't understand.
You see, muffy's not passionate enough, not romantic enough.
Julia, you've got to help me.
Help you?
What can I do?
Find another guy for muffy.
Get her so interested in him that she'll want to dump me.
Carter, I am shocked.
I can't do that.
Muffy's too nice.
Julie, I just told you.
I've had enough of nice.
If I could get rid of the nice, that would be nice.
Do you mind if I tell you something?
What?
That's not nice.
Well, if it isn't Isaac Washington,
the amazing disappearing bartender.
Carlene is looking for you.
Listen, and I saw what she did to you,
I wasn't going to hang around and get my arm taken off.
Isaac, come on.
Now, this is just me, all right?
Your friend, gopher?
What's the real reason you don't want to take that physical?
Promise not to tell?
Promise.
Everyone in my family has high blood pressure.
Doesn't mean you do.
I know that I do.
And if I take that test, and my blood
pressure is a little high, the line is going to fire me.
Isaac, if it's that serious, maybe you
ought to do something about it.
No way.
I feel fine.
But you know how doctors are.
They're always going to make a big deal out of everything.
Besides, that nurse carlene thinks
that the hippocratic oath includes dining and dancing.
Whoops.
Gopher, have you seen Isaac?
Are you kidding me?
He's right here.
Ah, no, I haven't seen him.
Well, when you do see him, tell him
I made him another appointment for his physical,
tonight at 7:30 sharp.
- Yes, I'll tell him. - Thanks.
Um hm.
Psst.
Is she gone?
She was gone, but now she's back.
I'll see you tonight, 7:30 sharp.
And don't worry.
If you can stay in that deep knee bend that long,
then you're in good shape.
And, of course, there's another good reason
for marrying the boss.
See, when ed tells me that he's working late at the office,
I don't have to worry because I'll be there with him.
How about some drinks?
Oh, I'll get them.
You and mom get acquainted.
Ok?
Let's sit down.
It is a little complicated, isn't it?
More than a little, Ted.
When she told me that her new boss was ed Anderson,
I never made the connection with you.
I gave up Ted when I went into business.
I figured it more, um, dignified being Edwin.
The whole thing is incredible.
You, of all people, marrying my daughter.
Yes, I know.
To think that 25 years ago it was you I was going to marry.
Mm, three years before your fiance was even born.
I have to be honest, Ted.
I don't think that you and Debbie
are right for each other.
Millicent, I think you're letting our past influence
Debbie's future.
Maybe, and maybe not.
[Music playing]
You told me he was older than you are,
but you didn't tell me he was twice your age.
I really don't care how old he is.
He's the right man for me.
Ah, you won't be saying that 20
years from now, when you're pushing
him around in a wheelchair.
Oh, all I know is that when he kisses me, well, bells ring.
But, darling, bells ringing isn't always a sign of love.
I mean, it could be an alarm telling you to get out fast.
Oh, Debbie, there are a lot of nice eligible men around that
are closer to your age.
But I love ed.
Oh, mom, now listen.
When we go to dinner tonight, I'll
come a little bit late so that you can visit with him
first and get to know him.
Come on, give him a chance.
Debbie, be there's something that you ought to know.
Oh, now, mom, just remember how important
it is to me that you like him.
[Music playing]
I'll try.
Thank you.
[Music playing]
Hi.
Good evening, nurse glover.
Oh, good evening, captain and Vicki.
Oh, I see you found our diet cake.
Oh, enjoy it.
So how are your physicals coming along?
Oh, just fine, except for Isaac standing me up
for the second time in one day.
He must be like me, one of those people
who hates taking physicals.
I can't understand it.
How can anyone resist being poked
with needles, hit with hammers, and feeling an icy
stethoscope on his chest?
Don't worry, carlene.
If Isaac keeps stalling, I'll have a talk with him.
No, no, please, I would like to handle this my own way.
Is your own way a sneaky way?
A very sneaky way.
Sneaky ways are always the best way.
- Yeah. - We'll see you later.
- Ok. - Good bye.
It was so kind of you to invite me to join you.
Oh, nonsense, Pete.
When I heard you order a single table,
I knew that we would never forgive ourselves
if we let you dine alone.
After all, these cruises are for making new friends.
Right, muffy?
Absolutely.
Enchanting, isn't she?
Yes, very.
And you know, when I saw that you were reading chaucer,
I knew that you and muffy would have so much to talk about.
You have an interest in chaucer.
Oh, he's my favorite.
Mine too.
I'm completing the definitive study on him.
An expert on chaucer?
I want to know all about your studies.
[Clears throat] Uh, would you two excuse me for a moment?
You don't mind if I leave you alone together?
Of course not. Take your time.
Thanks.
Julie.
Yeah.
I think I've done it.
Don't they look great together?
Carter, are you sure you know what you're doing?
Oh, yeah, yeah.
I've got it all planned.
They'll take a little midnight stroll on the deck,
have a little tete-a-tete in his room.
Uh huh.
And before long, there'll be wedding bells--
his, not mine.
Good idea if he's willing to give up the seminary.
He's a priest?
Not yet, but you have two weeks to talk him out of it.
This man you married, Debbie's father, what was he like?
Oh, an average guy--
I guess I was on the rebound after you.
And I married the first man who came along.
We were divorced when Debbie was just a little girl.
Yeah, I got married too.
It lasted three years.
I've lived the life of a bachelor ever since.
And then Debbie came to work for me.
Do you know?
Maybe I fell in love with Debbie because she reminded me of you.
Ed.
Yes?
Even if there weren't this age difference between you
and Debbie, could you comfortably
be married to the daughter of a woman
that you were once in love with?
Millicent, I was very much in love with you.
But that was a long time ago.
It's like something I read about in a book rather than something
in my own life.
I see.
Well, if you'll excuse me, i--
I think I'll skip dinner.
Mom, where are you going?
I seem to have lost my appetite.
I'll see you later.
Ed, what happened?
What's wrong with my mother?
Oh, I don't know.
Maybe she's having trouble getting
used to calling me "son."
[Music playing]
[Country dance music playing]
Carter, let's go upstairs on the deck
and take a walk in the moonlight.
Yeah, we can do that.
But wouldn't you rather stick around and dance a little bit?
You like to dance.
Yeah, but you don't
I know, but I shouldn't stand in your way.
If you want to dance with somebody else, I'd understand.
I'd be jealous, but I'd understand.
The moonlight is so pretty.
What?
The moonlight, it's beautiful.
Right.
Carter, I'm going out on the deck to take a walk.
All right, I'll join you in a minute-- in a minute.
Hi, doc.
How are you doing?
Great.
Boy, those cowboys sure make out like bandits.
[Rowdy music playing]
Doctor, thanks for the prescription.
Thank you.
Isaac, fiesta 123 wants a Magnum of champagne delivered
to their cabin right away.
A Magnum?
That sounds like a good party.
I better deliver that myself.
Now remember, you're still on duty.
I know.
I know.
But if I'm not back in three days, send caviar.
[Music playing]
Room service.
It's open.
Would you, uh, like me to open your champagne?
Carlene.
Well, you can open it, honey, because we're going
to drink to your good health.
That is, once you pass the physical.
[Music playing]
Howdy, little lady.
I'm Jim Billy James of Austin, Texas.
And you're about the prettiest looking little heifer
I've seen on this old tub.
Oh, thank you.
Now, you want to tell me what a pretty little girl
like you do is doing all alone on a moonlit night
like tonight?
Well.
Hey, you don't have to answer that.
Because you're not alone anymore.
Jim Billy is here.
Wait a minute. You can't.
You don't-- you don't understand.
What's to understand, but one good kiss deserves another?
[Music playing]
You know, I'm in love with you, and I
don't even know your name.
After that kiss, I don't even know my name.
I've got to go.
What?
And break old Jim Billy's heart?
When can I see you again?
You can't
I've got to.
How about breakfast?
No.
Maybe.
Maybe later.
Good night, Jim Billy.
Good night, my little darling.
Yahoo!
[Music playing]
A little Sherry.
Yes.
Thank you, captain, for brightening up what was looking
like a very dreary evening.
Is there anything else I can do?
I'm afraid not--
family problems.
Mother, I have to talk to you.
Well, must it be now?
Yes, it must be now.
There's absolutely no excuse for the way you've been acting.
I'm sure you'll excuse me.
Are you trying to embarrass me to death?
What is wrong with you?
I think you know what's wrong with me.
Ed is the man that I love, and you're
not even giving him a chance.
Debbie, I think you're being a little unfair to your mother.
Unfair?
I am hardly the one who's being unfair here.
Debbie, darling, I didn't mean to upset you.
I just didn't want you rushing into marriage.
Come on.
That is just an excuse.
You can't accept the fact that I'm in love with an older man.
What are you talking about?
All right, ladies, I don't think this
is the time or the place for this conversation.
I want to talk about this.
Now, mom, maybe you don't know how it feels to be in love.
Just because you had an unhappy marriage
doesn't mean that I'm going to.
Debbie, be don't think that we need to air
our dirty laundry in front of--
--a perfect stranger?
Well he may be a stranger to you, but he is perfect to me.
Debbie, you've gone too far.
It's not my fault that you've never
loved a man in your whole life.
Oh, yes, I have.
Ask your perfect stranger.
Oh, I'm sorry, Debbie.
I didn't ever mean to tell you that.
Debbie, it was a long time ago.
[Music playing]
Well, uh, how am I?
I think you're just fine.
I'm talking about the physical.
Well, let's see.
Your lungs are clear.
Your heart is good and strong.
Your blood pressure is a little high.
It is?
Well, that's because you got me all excited.
Oh, well, let's see what we can do about raising
my blood pressure.
Carlene, um, you know?
I've got an idea.
Can we talk about it.
Sure, but talking just tires out the lips
for the good stuff.
Oh. Tickle, tickle, tickle.
Listen, come on, carlene.
Just--
I can't come on any more than I already am.
Isaac, something happens when we're together.
Can't you feel it?
Uh, yeah, I can feel it.
It's the door know in my back.
[Music playing]
Jim Billy?
Hm?
Oh.
No, my name's Melvin.
Excuse me.
I was looking for a cowboy with a mustache.
Well, you give me a half hour, I'll grow one.
Thank you. I'm sorry.
Excuse me, muffy.
There's a phone call for you
oh, a phone call for me?
Look, if you change your mind, the name's Melvin.
Phone call from who?
Well, he didn't seem too sure himself.
First he said his name Jim.
Then he said his name was Billy.
Right.
Anyway, they want you on the phone.
Thank you.
Jim Billy, what a surprise.
Surprise?
You mean to tell me you weren't planning
on showing off that sexy new outfit for old Jim Billy?
Sexy, me?
Where did you see me?
Oh, I walked by while your eyes
were closed, sunning yourself.
I gotta tell you, girl, I had to go back to my cabin
and lie down a spell.
Jim Billy's old heart can't take that much action.
Well, uh, you're pretty exciting yourself.
Listen, when we get into acapulco,
there's a private little beach that I've been dying to go to.
I hear it's great for moonlight skinny dipping.
Are you interested?
Skinny dipping?
Well, now what about that handsome critter
traveling with you?
Handsome?
Oh, Carter?
Well, he's nice.
But see, that's just the problem.
He's just nice.
When it comes to romance and stuff, he's zero.
Zero?
Worse than zero.
Well, what are you doing with him?
I can't hurt his feelings.
But look.
I'll see you tonight after I get a chance to get rid of him.
Ok?
Yeah.
You get rid of him.
Sounds like a real jerk.
Bye.
[Music playing]
[Rapid knocking on door]
Isaac?
Isaac: Yeah, come in.
I came as quick as I could.
You sounded upset on the phone.
What's up?
My blood pressure, that's what's up.
And carlene put it on her report.
Well, you're not going to give up without a fight, are you?
Gopher, I can't hit a woman.
And unless I can get carlene to change that report,
I can kiss my job goodbye.
Isaac, rather than kiss your job
goodbye, why don't you try kissing carlene hello?
Gopher, I want to keep my job, but there
are limits to what I'll do.
I'll do it.
[Music playing]
Millicent, she just won't talk to me.
She won't open the door, and she won't even answer the phone.
Well, I couldn't get her to open
our connecting door all night.
She totally ignored me.
But then, if I heard something like that from my mother,
I guess I wouldn't be talking to me either.
It had to be quite a blow to her.
I'm sorry, ed.
I just blurted it out.
I didn't mean to say it.
I know that.
You know, I gave it a lot of thought last night.
Maybe I've been wrong.
What happened between us is all in the past.
And what I should really care about
is my daughter's happiness.
Now that sounds like the Millicent I know and love.
I hope it isn't too late though.
Well, I'm the one that botched things up, so it's up to me
to straighten it out.
I'll let her think about it a little while longer,
and then I'll try to talk to her.
In the meantime, I seem to remember
you liking to take long walks.
I still do.
Shall we?
You know, you're quite a team--
you inviting me to taste a walk, and my daughter
tells me to take a hike.
I think mine is a better offer.
Come on.
[Music playing]
[Knocking on door]
Come in.
Sweet rolls and coffee break.
Oh, Isaac, how'd you know I like sweet rolls?
I don't know.
Why, thank you.
That's very thoughtful.
Well, it's the least I could do for the prettiest nurse
on the ship.
Well, I'm glad to see you've finally come to your senses.
Well, I may be slow out of the gate, but I'm a fast finisher.
You know, I was wrong to run out on you last night.
Carlene, now I know that everything I want in life
is right here in this cabin.
Well, come and get it.
[Moans]
[Screams]
What's the matter, darling?
Passion.
Passion.
It's, uh, it's too early in the day for me.
I'm an animal-- an animal.
See you later, animal.
[Music playing]
Debbie, Debbie, I've got to talk to you.
I'd rather not.
No, I would rather not go on playing hide-and-seek.
Yeah, well I have nothing to talk about.
Sit down.
Now, what I want to say is--
is that nobody has done anything to hurt you.
Ed and I are two people from another time, another world.
He loves you.
And for whatever it's worth, you have my blessing.
That's all I have to say, except take one tip from your mother.
I can't change the past, but I can change the future.
He's a wonderful man.
Don't let him get away.
[Music playing]
Hello.
Doc?
Carlene?
Let's see, Washington, Washington, Washington.
All right, let's see.
Nope.
This is one way to lower your blood pressure.
She sure knows how to open a door.
Yes, I would like to sit down.
Debbie, I know you're having a hard time accepting all this.
But I want you to know I love you.
Do you really love me?
Of course, I do.
Enough to marry me?
Of course.
Oh, ed, I really do love you.
Hey, we just made up.
You can do better than that.
I didn't hear the bells as loud as I usually do.
Well, let's see what I can do about that.
[Music playing]
Announcer (on loudspeaker): Welcome to glorious acapulco,
ladies and gentlemen.
It's a beautiful day.
Temperatures are in the high 80s with balmy tropical breezes.
Enjoy the fine beaches and water sports, or treat
yourself to an exciting tour.
Hi, Carter.
What's the matter?
You look terrible.
Thank you.
I feel terrible.
The wedding's off.
Well, I don't understand.
I thought that was what you wanted.
It was.
But I didn't think it would happen like this.
Muffy's fallen in love with another man.
Who?
Me.
Let me get this straight.
The wedding's off because muffy's fallen in love
with you?
Right?
Wrong.
She fell in love with Jim Billy James from Austin, Texas.
Wait a second.
I thought you said she was in love with you.
She is.
I'm him.
What I mean is, I became Jim Billy
James to lure her away from me.
And now I've lost her to him, who's me.
The three of you will be very happy.
There's so much passion hidden in that woman.
Would you believe it, she asked me to go skinny
dipping with her tonight?
You gonna go?
No, she didn't ask me.
She's going with Jim Billy James.
[Music playing]
Carlene, don't you worry.
I'll deliver Isaac.
Trust me.
[Knocking on door]
Come in.
Doc, you wanted to see me?
Isaac, Isaac, what happened to your hand?
Oh, I got a splinter.
Is that all you want to see me about?
Oh, no, you've got bigger problems than that.
Isaac, here, sit down.
It's a wonder you were able to walk in here.
Well, what do you mean?
Well, carlene showed me your medical report.
You've got a serious blood pressure problem.
That can't be.
It says so right here.
Your blood pressure is 40 over 20.
Is that bad?
Bad?
Napoleon has been dead since 1821,
and he still has higher blood pressure.
Isaac, based on this report, I have no choice but to recommend
your dismissal.
[Chuckles] Wait a minute, doc.
That report's not right.
That's not my real blood pressure.
See, I snuck in and changed the report
because I thought it was a little too high,
and I didn't want to get fired.
Isaac, I know you'd say anything to save your job.
I'd do the same thing myself in your position.
I wish I could help you.
But there's really nothing I can do.
I'm sorry.
You gotta believe me, doc.
Look at me.
I'm healthy Isaac.
Come on now.
You've got to tell those people that-- that I'm all right.
Isaac, it's not up to me.
You'll have to speak to carlene.
She's in charge.
Ok, all right. All right.
Listen.
Ok, I'll talk to her.
Just don't turn in that report until I've
finished talking to her, ok?
Carlene?
He fell for it.
He's all yours.
[Music playing]
Now, to the bride and to the groom.
I wish you both a long and happy life together.
Thank you.
And, to one of the most wonderful women in the whole
world, my future mother-in-law.
Well, captain, I think we should
leave the happy couple alone.
I totally agree.
Good night.
- Good night. - Good night.
- Good night, darling. - Good night.
It's amazing how it all worked out.
Fantastic, except for one thing.
What?
Wrong bride.
You should be marrying my mother.
You're still in love with her.
Debbie, what are you talking about?
Seeing her again awakened all those old feelings.
Maybe I haven't been around as long as you have,
but I sure know what two people in love look like.
So do I, you and me.
Oh, ed, you're such a gentleman.
So you think you're honor-bound to go
through with our marriage.
But you're not being honest with yourself.
Debbie, your mother and I are just friends.
Well, that makes three of us that are just friends,
because the way you've been kissing me lately,
the sound of those bells just keeps getting fainter.
Go find her, ed.
Don't let her get away a second time.
[Music playing]
Julie (on loudspeaker): For you late starters,
there's still time for an authentic Mexican dinner
in acapulco, or a romantic stroll on the beach.
But remember, we sail at midnight.
[Music playing]
Carter, what are you doing here?
I came here because I know you're
supposed to meet somebody else.
What are you talking about?
About Jim Billy.
How did you find out about Jim Billy?
Because I was there when you were kissing him last night.
Oh, Carter, I'm sorry.
Oh, I feel so ashamed.
I was there because it was me you were kissing.
He came along and just swept me off my-- what do you
mean it was you I was kissing?
I'm Jim Billy James.
Carter, that's ridiculous.
Jim Billy is--
--is from Austin, Texas.
And you're about the cutest little heifer
on this whole tub.
Heavens.
Muffy, listen to me.
Things between us have always been so nice.
I was afraid that life with you was going to be boring,
so I wanted you to fall for another guy
and get me off of the hook.
But I was wrong.
I know now that you're all the woman I could ever want.
Carter, I have a confession .
I was afraid that life would be dull with you too.
So I tried to stay that nice little muffy.
But I'm not that nice little muffy.
And you're not that nice old Carter.
I think we're lovers.
Yeah, lovers.
Well all right, girl!
Yee haw!
[Music playing]
Milly?
Ed?
Where's Debbie?
She asked me to come out here and talk to you.
She has this idea that you and I are in love,
and that we're the ones who should be getting married.
Well, that's ridiculous.
Absurd.
We couldn't possibly be in love.
Of course not.
Absolutely impossible.
Ridiculous.
Ludicrous.
Preposterous.
[Music playing]
Milly, will you marry me?
Oh, I've been waiting 25 years to hear you say that.
And I've been waiting 25 years too.
Don't make me wait one more second before you say yes.
Yes.
[Music playing]
It's open.
Entree.
Carlene, listen.
I have to--
oh, I'm sorry.
I'll come back when you're dressed.
I am dressed.
Get back in here.
Come on.
Sit down, sugar.
Oh, what happened to your handy-wandy?
Oh, I got a little splinter-winter in it.
Baby.
Uh, carlene, carlene.
Huh?
I need your help.
Oh, I need your help too.
I can't open this champagne.
Could big, strong Isaac open this for poor little carlene?
In a minute.
In a minute.
You see, carlene, i'd like to talk to you
about high blood pressure.
Oh, let's not talk about medicine.
This is my night off.
Well, every night's going to be
my night off if I lose my job.
You see, carlene, I changed the blood pressure on my report
and made it too low.
Why did you do a dumb thing like that?
Because I thought it was too high,
and I was going to get fired.
Now you gotta tell doc that it's all right,
that I'm not really sick.
Oh, he knows that.
Do you think you could change that report
without us finding out?
Well--
you were never going to get fired in the first place.
See, Isaac, the company does not fire people
for having high blood pressure.
They treat them for it.
With a change of diet and proper medication,
most people live long lives.
Well, then I was right.
High blood pressure isn't that big a deal.
It sure is a big deal if you don't take care of it.
And I wouldn't want anything to happen to someone as nice
as you are.
I'm not losing my job.
I better get back to work.
Oh, but, Isaac, it seems a shame to waste
such expensive champagne.
You're right.
I'll see if I can get you a refund.
I just remembered.
We don't give refunds.
[Music playing]
Julie: Bye, enjoyed sailing with you.
I'll see you again next time.
Bye bye. - Julie.
Yeah?
You are going to come to the wedding, aren't you?
You two are getting married this time?
This time, yes, we are.
I'm glad because you two sure make a nice couple.
Uh uh uh.
[Clears throat]
Oh, I'm sorry.
I didn't mean nice.
You're not nice, not nice at all.
Thank you, Julie.
Thank you.
Bye bye.
Good luck.
Bye bye
come on, baby, let's git.
Bye.
Come and see us again.
Well, I hope you had a pleasant cruise.
We certainly did.
I met an old friend.
Oh, how wonderful.
I even did better than that.
I met my future bride.
Oh, well how ever wonderfuler.
We're working on her grammar.
Bye bye, captain, Vicki.
Mom, ed.
I brought you something.
Oh, how sweet Debbie.
I didn't know the gift shop was open.
Well, it's not from the gift shop.
It's from my heart.
Oh.
I thought we'd keep the engagement ring in the family.
And I can't think of a better family to keep it in.
Shall we go?
Bye, carlene.
It was great having you with us.
Aw, great being here.
Now, Isaac, I hope you remember everything
I taught you last night.
What did she teach you last night?
Well, she taught me to cut out salt, watch my diet,
and to get plenty of exercise.
And what else?
And you taught me never to let a desirable young woman such
as yourself slip through my fingers again.
Ooh, nice job.
As you know, doc, that's what we call preventive medicine.
[Theme music]
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