Original subtitles

[Theme music]

Love, exciting and new.

Come aboard.

We're expecting you.

And love, life's sweetest reward.

Let it flow.

It floats back to you.

The love boat, soon we'll be making another run.

The love boat promises something for everyone.

Set a course for adventure, your mind on a new romance.

And love won't hurt anymore.

It's an open smile on a friendly shore.

It's love.

Welcome aboard.

It's love.

Oh, fellows, wait till you see her.

This girl is really something.

She must be.

I've never seen you so turned on, doc.

I've never seen him turned off.

Adam.

[Kissing]

Mona, honey.

You just don't know how I've been looking forward to this.

Oh, you're playing my song.

But I'll tell you what.

Why don't we go up to my cabin, and you can help me unpack.

Or we could go to my cabin.

But you don't have to unpack.

Right.

It'll save us time.

Mona, honey.

Excuse me.

Could we go ahead of you, sir?

My wife is expecting.

We're Mr. and Mrs. Arthur talmadge.

Well, hello.

Yes.

Yes, you're on this deck, promenade 340.

How far is it from the doctors office?

Oh, Arthur.

Well, let's see.

Your cabin is toward the stern.

And the doctor's mid-ship about four decks down.

Now that is good enough.

Could we get a cabin a little bit closer, please?

Oh, Arthur, for heaven's sake.

I'm due for over two months.

Two months.

I think your cabin's close enough.

[Music playing]

You see that girl?

She wants me.

Who?

That lady didn't even look at you.

Ah, you noticed, huh?

Yeah.

Yeah, they all use that old ignoring trick.

You'd think they try something new.

Gentleman.

There's a Ms. Bradley coming aboard.

I'm told she is an important designer.

So show her the usual courtesies.

One fruit basket coming up, captain.

Yes, and arrange a suitable dinner on deck, sir.

Linda: Excuse me.

I'm Linda Bradley.

You're Linda Bradley?

Well, welcome aboard.

You're in promenade 101.

Oh, thank you.

I'm captain merrill stubing.

Oh.

Uh, the passageways can be confusing.

May I escort you?

Oh, that's very kind, but you must be so busy.

No.

Sir, before you go, if you've got a minute--

is the ship sinking?

No.

Then I don't have a minute.

[Music playing]

Well, hello.

Your name please?

Uh, Harper, Harrison Harper.

Ok, yes, you're in cabin f131 on the fiesta deck.

Oh, see, I was kind of hoping to keep away from people

this cruise.

Fiesta deck, that sounds like it might be a little too loud

and festive for me.

Would you have anything called the, uh, peace and quiet deck?

Well, maybe we can move you later.

Enjoy your cruise, Mr. Harper.

Thank you.

Julie: Hello.

Hello.

I'm judge joanne Atkinson.

Well, welcome aboard, your honor.

Thank you.

Uh, excuse me.

Did that gentleman say his name was Harper?

Yes, Harrison Harper.

Do you know him? - Yes, I do.

And I'm going to keep remembering him for two more

years, because that's the amount of time I put him on probation.

Oh?

Oh, not that kind of probation.

No, uh, Mr. Harper we brought in my court

for marrying too many women.

It's more than the law allows.

That nice, nervous little man was a bigamist.

No, that nice, nervous little man is a trigamist.

[Ship's horn blaring]

[Music playing]

Are you a professional artist, too, Ms. Bradley?

Well, hello.

Hi.

Uh, no, I'm a designer by trade and an artist for kicks--

and a golfer just to keep me humble.

Hm.

Take notes, Vicki.

I think I just met an almost perfect woman.

Vicki: Yes, sir. - Here you are.

Oh.

Almost?

Well, perfection includes cooking.

And I don't think you--

uh, correction.

I just happen to be a gourmet cook.

I don't believe it.

Now would I lie about a thing like that?

Can you make a baked Alaska?

Kid stuff-- one arm tied behind my back.

Wow!

I'm impressed.

Vicki, I think maybe your father's falling in love.

Uh-uh, careful, captain.

You know how women are about men in uniform.

Hm.

Well, what do you think?

Oh, I like it.

Uh, dad--

[music playing]

Hm?

--It's time for my navigation lesson.

Oh, uh, Vicki, uh, can we do that later?

Right now, I'd like to challenge Ms. Bradley to some ping pong.

There must be something she can't do.

I'll play winner.

Vicki, don't ruin that sketch.

Find gopher, and get a frame for it.

Come on.

Let's see how you can handle a real challenge.

You got a deal.

[Music playing]

We shouldn't have come.

Oh, Arthur, I wanted to come on this cruise.

After the baby's born, we won't have the time.

Believe me.

I'm fine.

So please, let's just relax, and enjoy the trip.

How can I relax when I know you're

going to give birth any minute.

Arthur.

You know, in my family, all the babies are premature.

I was born on an airplane.

My brother was born in dodger stadium.

And my sister was born in a restaurant between the salad

and the lamb chops.

I'll be right back.

Excuse me.

Could you call the doctor?

Well, certainly.

Is there some sort of emergency?

Yes, my wife is having a baby.

Oh.

Uh, Dr. Bricker, please.

This is an emergency.

Thank you.

Uh, he's in his cabin.

They're connecting me now.

Thank you.

[Music playing]

Mona.

Mm.

[Phone ringing]

Dr. Bricker.

Now?

[Scoffs]

I'll be right back.

[Kissing]

Mind my place.

Mr. Harper?

Yes?

Mr. Harper, I'm judge akinson, the judge who sentenced you.

Oh, I'm glad to see you.

Uh, most of these tours seem to feature churches.

Would you maybe go with me?

Go with you?

For protection, of course.

See, every time I've ever gone into a church,

I come out married--

except once.

Oh, what happened that time?

It was a funeral.

But then I went up to the window,

and I said I was sorry about her husband.

The next thing you know, I was him.

Mr. Harper, you said you were glad to see me.

Why would you be glad to see the judge who sentenced you?

Well, I broke the law.

And you, as a judge, were sworn to enforce that law.

You can't have people running around breaking the law.

If you have such respect for the law,

why did you break the law by marrying three women at once?

I didn't mean to break the law.

I didn't even want to get married once.

But I had to.

Had to?

Well, see, they all asked me, and I couldn't say no.

I didn't want to hurt their feelings.

So what you're saying is you weren't guilty.

Oh, I was guilty, guilty of wanting

three women to have a husband if they wanted one and needed one.

Like, see, uh, it just so happens

that my wanting three women not to be lonely

was against the law.

And-- i-- that's-- uh.

If judging other people were against the law,

you'd be in a terrible fix.

That's not the same thing at all!

Mr. Harper, I'm warning you.

I'm going to be watching you very closely.

Most women do.

[Music playing]

Mr. Doc, i--

in a minute, Julie.

Mrs. Talmadge, have you started labor yet?

Uh, no, and I don't plan to for two months.

Well, it certainly took you long enough to get here.

Oh, Arthur.

Doctor, I am terribly sorry.

I'm having the baby, and he's having the labor pains.

You mean there's no emergency.

No, doc.

You see, Mr. Talmadge gave me a false alarm.

Excuse me.

But if this had been the real thing,

you would have had to have made much better time.

I was making very good time where I was.

If you'll excuse me.

Forgive me, doctor.

But are you were an accredited doctor?

I mean, did you go to a real medical school and graduate?

Arthur.

That's all right.

I actually have a diploma in my office.

I could xerox a copy for you if you like.

Have you ever delivered any babies?

Quite a few.

Ah, the mothers and children all did well.

And even most of the fathers survived.

Dr. Bricker, in case of emergency,

I want to know where you are at all times.

Excuse me?

When did you say the baby's due?

Well, my doctor figures about nine weeks.

Nine weeks.

In nine weeks, I'll be vacationing in Rio de Janeiro.

But you'll be able to get me.

I'll be wearing a beeper.

[Music playing]

Good afternoon, Mr. Harper.

Oh, good afternoon.

I hope you're not planning to marry that women.

I have never planned on marrying any of them.

It just happened.

You know, I sit down.

I drop my book.

She picks it up.

I say thank you.

She offers to buy me a drink.

And the next thing you know, I'm down at the city hall

standing there swearing to love, and honor

for the rest of my life this lady

who just picked up my book.

You know what I wish?

What?

I wish sometimes they'd let me pick up my own book.

That's what I wish.

Hey, you could do me me a favor.

What?

Wait here in a little while.

And when that lady comes back, tell her,

please don't make me marry her.

Oh, Mr. Harper, no woman can make you marry her.

Besides, she just met you.

That's always the first step.

Well, I think you can defend yourself-- and you'd better.

[Music playing]

Oh, you play a mean game of ping pong, captain.

You fooled me.

I thought sailors only drank and chased women.

Well, here's one who does neither.

I'm a whiz card tricks and do a great Cary Grant.

Oh, you do?

The complete renaissance man.

Well, I hope your wife appreciates all those talents.

I don't have one of those.

Uh-oh.

Old foot-in-the-mouth did it again, huh?

Of course not.

I, uh--

I wasn't just being nosy.

I know you weren't.

You do know, don't you?

I don't think there's anything you could

ask me that I'd mind answering.

No, at the moment, there's nobody in my life.

Vicki's mother died some time ago.

Oh, I'm sorry.

And it still hurts?

Not as much as it did.

I don't think I'll ever really forget her.

But the big hurt is over.

And of course, you have Vicki.

She's darling.

[Chuckling]

Yes, I have Vicki.

She makes everything worthwhile to me.

I'm very glad to meet you, captain.

The pleasure is mine, all mine.

Would you have dinner with you me tonight?

I'd love to.

That sounds great.

[Music playing]

Hi, have you seen my dad?

Um, let's see.

The last I saw him--

yeah, he and Linda were playing ping pong.

But that was hours ago.

Nobody knows where they are.

Oh, them?

I wouldn't worry about them.

I'm sure they're around someplace.

Julie.

Yes, sir?

Hello, honey.

Julie, would you tell gopher to arrange

for Linda to be seated at my table for all meals, please?

Oh, I'd love to, sir.

But, uh, there are no vacancies at your table.

You're all filled up.

Oh.

Well, then tell them to move one of our crewman.

Vicki: Dad?

You're still going to take me ashore at mazatl n.

You bet!

It's going to be you and me together.

We'll have a ball.

[Kissing]

Well, I got to go.

Linda's waiting for me.

Mm-hmm.

I think I see stars in the old captain's eyes.

You think he's hooked?

Like Charlie the tuna.

[Music playing]

You know, it was really a nice coincidence

to have them sitting both of us at the same table.

Oh, it wasn't a coincidence.

I asked to sit with you.

I want to see what this charm is that you have for other women,

which totally escapes me.

Well, if you get it figured out, I wish you'd tell me.

And I can just turn it off.

And then I won't have to keep getting married all the time.

Well, you'll be the first to know if I find even

an ounce of charm.

You know, there is one thing about me that

might appeal to a lot of women.

Oh?

Uh, they seem to think I'm helpless.

Oh, well, helplessness is the last thing

that would appeal to me.

Oh.

Where's our waiter?

Where is that waiter?

Is, uh, that part of your helplessness act?

Because if it is, it's not going over with me.

Oh.

Would you like some more wine?

Thank you.

You know, some women think you should mother a man.

But I think a man should act like a man.

You have a-- you've got something on the side.

Linda, I want to thank you for the best

day I've had in a long time.

Thank you for one of the best days I've ever had.

Are you wearing lipstick, Linda?

Huh?

Oh, yes, I am.

Um, I think it's called night flame.

It comes with matching nail Polish, too.

Oh, my father doesn't like women who wear makeup.

Now hold it, Vicki.

You're putting words in my mouth.

No I said, it depends on who is wearing the makeup

and how it's applied.

In this case, both of affection.

Incidentally, I'm taking Vicki on a personal

merrill stubing guided tour of mazatl n tomorrow.

How about joining us?

Oh, I'd love to if Vicki doesn't mind.

Of course she wouldn't mind, would you, honey?

Of course not.

There.

You see?

It's all set.

We'll have a ball.

Yeah.

[Music playing]

Why didn't you wait for me?

I was only gone 10 minutes.

Well, I figured you'd be gone much longer,

so I went out and got some sun.

Besides, we were going much too fast anyway.

Mona, we got a lot of time to make up for.

So why don't we just cut out and--

Adam.

Adam, you're not listening.

What?

Well, a woman likes to be charmed.

She likes to have some tender words of love

before she's dragged off.

Don't you understand?

Well, sure, of course.

Your eyes are like liquid pools.

Your lips are Ruby red.

Let's go!

Ply me with champagne.

Ok.

[Glasses clink]

Dr. Bricker, I can't believe this!

My wife and baby in your hands and you're out carousing.

What kind of a doctor are you?

Boozing!

My wife could be giving birth at any moment.

I'm glad I found you before you wound up under the table.

What are you doing?

Excuse me.

No more drinks for this table.

Young lady, if you want to do your good deed for the day,

you take this man to bed.

Now you're making sense.

Adam, I didn't know you were supposed to be on duty.

No, I'm not.

This guy is just nervous.

His wife isn't due for months.

But you have responsibilities.

And I don't want to get in the way.

Mona, your hair is silky.

Your skin's like snow.

Sorry.

Sorry.

But I just wouldn't feel right taking up your time

when you're needed somewhere else.

But-- but I'm not.

And even if I were, it's no big deal.

She's just having a baby.

It's not as though she's dying.

Just having a baby?

No, no.

The biggest moment in a woman's life and you're

dismissing it. - No, no.

You want to know something?

I think that man is right to be worried.

Mona, I didn't mean it that.

Wait, wait, I'll go with you.

Don't bother.

Goodnight, Dr. Bricker.

Mona, sweetheart.

It doesn't seem right for a judge

to be dancing with the man she put on probation.

Well, it's not against the law, is it?

No, it's not against the law.

Why not just relax, and enjoy it?

Well, it doesn't seem proper.

Well, why don't you look at it this way.

You're just helping a criminal to rehabilitate himself.

How's that?

Well, uh, if-- if I'm here dancing with the presiding

judge, I can't very well be out there committing acts of crime.

Uh-huh.

Well, let's just make sure of that, huh?

There are, uh, two ladies who are

trying to get your attention.

Which two ladies?

Over and over there.

Well, I want you to know I did absolutely nothing to encourage

either one of them.

I didn't say you were pursuing them.

I said they were pursuing you, although I

can't figure out why.

[Music playing]

Arthur, please come to bed.

If you do on your pacing now, you're

going to be too tired to pace when you're really supposed to.

Betty, I've make a decision.

I don't want to go through with it.

Call it off.

Let's-- let's not have the baby.

Oh, fine.

Phone the stork, and him tell him we changed our mind.

You don't know what it is to have a baby.

[Sighs]

That's it.

That's it.

Arthur-- Arthur, I haven't had a decent night's sleep in ages.

Now if you don't control yourself,

I'm going to have to leave you.

Leave me?

Yes.

First, I'm going to change cabins.

And then when we get home, i'm going to stay with my sister

until the baby is born.

Oh, you wouldn't.

Oh, Arthur, I am very serious about this.

Now you either promise to control yourself

or I'm going to do it!

Honey, honey, hey.

Don't you know, i'm--

I'm acting like this, because I love you.

And I care about you and the baby.

Oh, I love you, too.

But if you really care about me, you'll relax,

and let me enjoy this trip.

Believe me, the baby will be here in its own due time.

Babies can't tell time.

Arthur, promise me, or I'll do it.

(Muffled) I promise.

I promise.

And you'll live up to it?

Even if it kills me.

[Music playing]

What a wonderful evening.

Well, I had fun, too.

Well, I'll say goodnight now.

Uh, I'll see you in the morning.

Would you like to come in for a nightcap?

Well, it's really getting kind of late.

I'd better be going.

It's not even midnight yet.

I know.

But we've had a long day, you know?

We-- we really should be in bed.

One drink.

What harm can it do?

[Music playing]

No.

No, I was married but not anymore.

My husband decided that 22 was a much more exciting age than 38.

Oh, if you don't mind my saying so, I think

you were married to a fool.

I don't mind you saying so at all.

[Scoffs]

As far as I'm concerned, you're very exciting at any age.

Thank you.

I needed that.

And if there's anything I can do for you, captain--

there is.

Stop calling me captain.

My name is merrill.

I expect to be hearing it a lot.

The feeling, merrill, is very mutual.

[Music playing]

Sorry, honey.

Excuse me.

I'll be right back, dear.

[Music playing]

Uh, doc, can I talk to you just for a minute?

Just stop bouncing and settle.

Look, I know I've been a pain, but I need your help.

See, I told my wife that I would control

myself, that I would, uh, stop bothering her

and everybody else.

Really?

How can I help?

Well, doc, I was wondering if you could give me

a pill or something that could take my mind

off the baby and everything.

Arthur, you don't need a pill.

You just need something to occupy your time.

Look, whenever you feel troubled, just try jogging.

Now put your energy into that.

It's great therapy.

Jogging, huh?

Jogging.

Yeah, jogging.

You know, I think I'll do that.

- Ok. - Thanks, doc.

My pleasure.

Pleasure-- hi, would you try Mona forsithe please?

What a way to live!

The sea, the sun--

how do you manage to work?

Or do you?

Eh, even fairy land doesn't run by itself.

Let me show you where our little elves do their thing.

He must really like you.

Even I'm not allowed up here very often.

Captain: This is where playtime ends and the real world begins.

In my mind, I always picture that part of there

as the sexy, glamorous body.

And this part up here is the brain.

You know, I never thought about it that way.

But it's true.

I have a feeling you know something about ships.

No.

Maybe enough to recognize, uh, that gizmo over there

is a compass.

And that's a radar screen and a fathometer is--

you're not only beautiful, you're smart.

[Chuckling]

Maybe we should keep her here with us for a while.

I'll let you in on a secret.

It wouldn't take long to get used to liking this.

[Music playing]

Here you are, [inaudible].

Oh, thank you.

Eh, eh, eh, eh.

- Oh, oh, oh. - More comfortable now?

Yes, I am.

Thank you.

Are you sure you wouldn't like to go on a sightseeing trip?

No, I don't think I want to.

I've seen mazatl n before.

Oh.

Many times-- many, many times.

Oh.

I spent most of my honeymoons there.

Oh.

Well, happy memories, huh?

Right, right.

Well, that's all past.

Right.

Uh, it's getting a will warm, isn't it?

Yeah, it sure is.

Where are you going?

I have to go back to my room.

Oh, well I'll go with you.

I have to go back to my cabin.

I'll go with you, ok?

Well, I'm just going to change into my bathing suit.

Oh, well, hurry right back, will you?

Oh, I'll be back on a dead run.

Ok.

Hey, Julie, I got something to tell me you.

You won't believe it.

I don't believe it.

Mr. Harper and I are engaged.

Well, don't you understand?

We're engaged to be married.

Congratulations.

Well, what does that mean?

Well, excuse me for not being too enthusiastic, your honor.

But I just spoke with a woman a few minutes ago.

And she told me that she was engaged to marry Mr. Harper.

I'm going to have a few words with her.

Oh, well don't you think you ought

to cool off a little first?

Darling, I am a member of the American judicial system.

I will give Mr. Harper every chance to explain

himself before I kill him.

Julie (over loudspeaker): Ladies and gentlemen,

we will be docking in mazatl n in 20 minutes.

Tour buses will be waiting at the dock.

[Music playing]

[Knocking]

Well, I was just thinking about you.

Oh, I bet you say that to all your fiance s.

No, only you.

I really love you.

Now, now, Harrison.

Do you really?

Of course I do.

Did you get engaged to the chambermaid, too?

Well, see, uh, she did wash out a lot of my socks,

which she really didn't have to do.

And one thing led to another.

[Slaps]

Well, she wouldn't take a tip.

[Music playing]

[Laughing]

I'm glad you apologized.

So am I. I will never say a woman is just pregnant again.

[Music playing]

Are you sure that little man won't interrupt us this time?

Mm-hmm.

There won't be any more calls about babies.

I'm all yours.

Mona.

Adam.

[Music playing]

[Phone ringing]

Dr. Bricker.

Julie (on phone): Hello, doc, it's an emergency.

It's the talmadges.

She's giving birth.

Julie (on phone): No, not her.

It's him.

Him?

He was jogging and tripped.

I think he broke his leg.

[Music playing]

My mother was right.

I should have a dentist.

[Music playing]

Yes.

Captain, I will never doubt your word again.

You really are a fantastic guide!

From now on, you get all my business.

Oh, you're a witness, Vicki.

We're going to hold her to that.

[Sighs]

It's time for me to get to work.

Uh, excuse me, ladies.

I'll see you for cocktails.

Oh, sounds great.

[Birds squawking]

Your dad's quite a guy.

That's what all the ladies say.

[Birds squawking]

They do?

Oh, sure.

I guess it's the uniform.

Women are always chasing him.

He has a new one just about every cruise.

Is that right?

Oh, well, you know, the captain.

He's so considerate.

He just can't say no to any of them.

I hope you're not the jealous type.

Vicki, how about you and me leveling with each other?

What do you mean?

Well, I mean we can have a straight out, air-clearing,

heart-to-heart talk.

Ok.

Woman to woman.

Just between us.

Mm-hmm, you got it.

It stops right here.

[Music playing]

Ok.

Up until about a year ago, I never even knew my father.

When my mother died, I came to live with him.

And we love each other.

And I was just really getting to know him--

or I was until you came along.

Before that, it was just the two of us.

Vicki, I don't--

you're so pretty, and you're so smart.

He just doesn't have time for me anymore.

That's not true.

It is true!

I love him, and I don't want to share him.

But if you're around--

Vicki?

[Sighs]

Vicki.

[Music playing]

Yeah, you were right, doc.

You said the jogging would take my mind off the baby.

And it certainly did.

You didn't break it.

You were lucky.

The x-rays show it's just a nasty sprain.

So give it plenty of rest.

Oh, but this is our last night.

I was hoping to do a little dancing.

It's probably the last chance I'll get to boogie for awhile.

Oh, no, no, please.

I recommend, uh, plenty of rest for you, too.

A nice, quiet evening is what you both need.

Oh, you think that's best, huh?

Uh, yeah-- for all of us.

Well, then I guess we'll just get a good night's sleep.

Oh, wait.

We both can't go to sleep.

What happens if the baby comes?

We won't know.

I'll know.

Will you wake me?

I promise.

Well, goodnight.

I'll see that he gets to bed.

Yes.

I think I'll get to bed, too.

[Music playing]

To be taken in by that pipsqueak blue beard.

He's not handsome.

He has no charm-- nothing.

Well, at least now you're cured.

There was something so appealing.

Maybe you're not cured.

No, I'm cured.

Ok.

Well, now is your chance to find out for sure.

Good luck.

I've been looking for you all over.

I'm sorry I hurt you.

I get engaged to two ladies, because I don't

want to hurt their feelings, and I want

to make them feel desirable.

And then I hurt the one that I least wanted to hurt.

Look, if you won't talk to me as a woman,

will you talk to me as a judge?

What do you want to talk about.

As a judge [sighs] I am only concerned with your marrying

more than the limit--

the legal limit.

As a woman, as far as I'm concerned,

you can become engaged to every woman in Pittsburgh.

Well, as a judge who put me on probation,

I think you should help me decide between the two women

that I am now engaged to.

Two?

Well, that includes the chambermaid.

Could you help me?

Not on your life.

Look, if you don't help me decide which one to marry,

I think you are encouraging me to violate my probation.

Are you sure there are only two?

Well, I say two.

But actually, there's three.

Three?

No, I was kidding.

[Chuckling]

But it is funny how two seems so little

after, just a few seconds ago, you thought

there were three, right?

Will you help me?

Well, you are my responsibility.

Thank you.

[Music playing]

[Knocking]

Hi, here's your date for the--

I, uh-- I didn't want you to go to any trouble for me.

But, uh, isn't that a little casual for a dance?

I'm-- I'm not going to the dance, merrill.

Huh?

Would you like to tell me why?

Well, there's really nothing to tell.

I just changed my mind.

That's all. [Scoffs]

It's supposed to be a woman's prerogative, it isn't?

Uh, it's a little awkward standing

on here in the passageway.

May I come in for a minute?

No, I don't think that would be a good idea.

Afraid I'll change your mind?

[Scoffs]

Please don't try.

[Music playing]

I don't understand.

I'm sorry.

I-- i--

I realized that i--

I'm just not cut out to be a sailor's girl.

And I think we ought to end it before somebody gets hurt.

I'm sorry, merrill.

Goodnight.

[Music playing]

Adam.

I can't.

[Scoffs]

What's wrong?

Well, why hasn't he called?

Well, you said he was asleep.

He's setting me up.

I feel it.

[Music playing]

If I'd known you were going to behave like this,

I'd have gone to the dance.

I can't help it.

I know him.

He's out there.

I can see him just waiting for the right moment.

Do you hear anything?

[Music playing]

Here you go.

[Music playing]

Come in.

Dad?

Hi, honey.

Aren't you coming to the dance?

Uh, maybe later.

I'm not feeling up to it right now.

Please.

Just one dance?

Not tonight, sweetheart.

I've got a lot of thinking to do.

You run along.

Have fun.

[Music playing]

[Sighs]

Well, now you know as much as I do about the girls

I'm engaged to.

Now which one do you think would be the best wife for me?

Are you certain you want me to help pick out a lady for you?

I sure am.

Are you sure you want to get married at all?

Oh, I have to get married to some nice woman who will settle

me down and keep me from getting married all them

others out there.

If you're serious, I'll be serious.

I think the chambermaid is out.

That's an awfully high price to pay for clean socks.

How about the lady that owns a home in Florida?

Well, I don't think Florida is any good.

When you have very fair skin and, uh, you freckle and burn--

no.

Yeah.

I don't want to marry some woman who's going to make me freckle.

Hey, do you know why I didn't recognize you the first day

I saw you on the ship?

Why?

Because the last time I saw you, it was in court.

And were way up there on that bench above me,

you know, looking down at me.

Hey, would you promise to marry me if I promised you

that, right this minute, I'd go down to my cabin

and lock myself in until the ship gets back to shore?

You wouldn't have to do that.

I'll lock you in from the inside.

[Music playing]

Well, it's after midnight.

Yeah, you're right, honey.

He must be asleep.

Yeah, he's asleep.

Ok, I'm all yours.

Oh, Mona.

Mona?

[Whimpers]

Mona?

Mona?

Mona?

[Music playing]

Hi, honey.

What are you doing up so late?

I couldn't sleep.

It's all my fault, daddy.

All right, 30 days in the brig.

I'm serious.

I'm sorry.

What's it all about?

I'm the one who spoiled it between you and Linda.

I think you better talk about it.

I told her go away, to leave you alone.

Why, Vicki?

(Crying) Because I was afraid.

Afraid?

Of what?

I was so afraid of losing you.

Honey, you're not going to lose me.

Honest?

Of course.

How could you ever think like that?

Well, I haven't been your daughter for very long.

[Crying]

And I thought that, maybe if you love Linda more

than you love me, that maybe you wouldn't

want me around anymore.

And maybe--

Vicki, you're my daughter, and I love you.

You're part of me.

I'll always love you no matter what happens.

But if you love Linda, then

sweetheart, love isn't something you run out of.

You have an endless supply.

And the wonderful thing is, no matter how much we give,

it never diminishes.

My love for you will just continue to grow and grow.

Vicki, no one will ever come between us.

Thank you, daddy.

[Sniffling]

[Music playing]

Julie.

Yes?

Julie, I know I've said this before,

but this time it's decided.

Mr. Harper and I are going to be married.

Congratulations!

Oh, but what about the other--

oh, but everything is perfect.

Yes.

I am Mr. Harper's one and only fianc e.

Well, that's great!

Well, not quite, dear.

You swore.

I swore-- I swore that I was not

engaged to anybody on the ship.

But when we get to my apartment, you're

going to find two ladies, one in 1011 and one

in 706 that you're going to have to have a little talk with.

[Music playing]

I'm really sorry about last night.

Well, I understand.

Uh, these things happen.

Well, look, uh, you really don't have to see me home.

It's quite all right.

But I insist.

It will be my pleasure.

And best of all, we won't have to worry

about Betty and Arthur.

You were right.

I worried for no reason at all.

Oh, I told you.

The only thing I'm sorry about I didn't get to boogie.

[Screaming]

The baby!

I think it's starting.

Arthur: Is there a doctor here?

Get the doc.

Doc!

Doc, it's Mrs. Talmadge.

This time it's the real thing.

Mona.

Bye.

Excuse me.

Merrill?

I found her, dad.

And we had a long talk.

Is everything straight?

Everything is straight.

[Sighs]

It's a pity this didn't happen last night.

You still owe me that dance.

Then I'll just have to come back, won't I?

[Music playing]

Um, I think Julie's looking for me.

[Music playing]