Original subtitles

Theme song: Love, exciting and new.

Come aboard, we're expecting you.

And love, life's sweetest reward, let it flow,

it floats back to you.

The love boat, soon will be making another run.

The love boat promises something for everyone.

Set a course for adventure, your mind on a new romance.

And love won't hurt anymore.

It's an open smile on a friendly shore.

It's love.

Welcome aboard, it's love.

Enjoy your cruise.

Try to stay sober.

All right, that's just part of the entertainment this trip.

You.

Hey, Patti, how are you two doing?

Oh, we couldn't be better, Isaac.

Speak for yourself.

I got this funny feeling inside me.

It's my hand, dummy.

[Laughing]

Hey, where's your husband?

Are you two still a team?

They have separate bedrooms-- his is in New York,

hers is in New Jersey.

I'm sorry.

We only took this gig with him because it

was booked a year in advance, but it's

the last time we work together.

See?

I told you not to worry.

I told you they'd be here.

Uh-oh.

I think I'm going to have an attack of poison oak.

[Laughing]

Announcement over the P.A.: Captain stubing to the bridge,

please.

Captain stubing to the bridge.

Very nice.

Oh, thank you.

I have this new barber, and--

hi there.

Oh.

Hi, I'm Judy Barrett.

And this is my fiance, Gary Gage.

Oh.

Welcome aboard.

Thanks.

Has my sister joanie checked in yet?

Not yet, no.

Is your sister as beautiful as you?

Exactly.

Really?

Her fiance is almost as cute as I am.

How nice for all of you.

[Chuckles]

[Inaudible].

Ah, your sister still hasn't checked in yet.

She must have.

She left the house an hour before I did.

Don't worry about it.

We'll find her.

Just check me and my fiance in.

But aren't you engaged to--

Judy: There they are.

Ted: Oh, the gang's all here.

Joanie!

Judy!

[Inaudible], sir.

Captain stubing: You must be the foursome.

Well, I'm delighted to tell you I just received confirmation.

All arrangements have been completed

for your double wedding in romantic puerto vallarta.

Gopher: Ah, congratulations, joanie, Judy.

No, no, no, that's Judy.

How can you be so sure?

Well, it's easy.

You're always wrong.

[Laughing]

Gopher, remind me to give you a class in deductive reasoning.

Joanie is with Ted.

Judy is with Gary.

Congratulations.

Thank you.

You going to join me, doctor?

It isn't my fault you forgot to bring you good jeans.

It is, too.

You ironed them and hung them in the stupid closet.

All right, come on now, girls.

No one cares what a 12-year-old looks like anyway.

Yes, they do.

Girls, you're driving your old man up the wall.

Ok?

I'm going to tell dad what you did.

You better not.

She kissed a boy.

I did not!

You filthy snitch.

Come on now, kids.

For crying out loud, cut it out.

She blames me for everything!

She made me forget my good jeans and she kissed a boy!

Stool pigeon.

Hold it.

Now, you can't blame your sister for something you forgot.

And kissing's all right, as long as you

don't do it with just anybody.

Now, shake hands and don't let me see you fighting again

or I'm going to feed you to my giant man-eating guppy.

Shake hands.

Now, welcome aboard the Princess, ladies.

You're terrific.

Oh, thank you.

My own adolescence lasted quite a long time,

and I understand girls.

Well, thanks a lot.

You really are terrific.

Well, you must be an old adolescent yourself.

Oh, yes, that's for sure.

Well, um, [clears throat] See you later.

- Uh-huh. - Come on.

- Enjoy your cruise. - Thank you.

- Goodbye. - Goodbye.

Bye.

Nice looking family, huh?

Yes, isn't he?

Don't worry, it's easy.

The lady with the hat gets the drink with the parasol.

Now, I may mix my drinks, but I never mix up my customers.

Mr. Ashton, you're in luck.

I just called puerto vallarta, as you

suggested, and booked the mariachi band for the wedding.

Fantastic!

All right!

And it isn't just any mariachi band--

los compadres De la playa.

25 pieces-- trumpets, violins, the works.

Arriba!

Ole!

Ted, it's my wedding, too.

Well, what's wrong?

I mean, couldn't you consult me?

Well, I thought you'd like it.

I was thinking of something a little more quiet and romantic,

too-- like, say, one guitar.

That would be perfect.

Well, I'm sorry.

I'll just cancel the band.

Are you kidding?

Los campadres?

You guys are gonna love them!

They're fantastic!

La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, hey!

[Applause]

Oh, thank you.

Ah, here we go-- two gin & tonics,

and a drink with the parasol for the lady in a hat.

Isaac, don't tell me you're still confused.

Now, this is Ted, this is Gary, and these are joanie and Judy.

[Applause]

You've got the oddest texture hair.

It's a wig.

Don't you feel dumb talking to a piece of wood?

Now that you mention it.

Oh, it's your wife.

I recognize her.

I thought you were supposed to switch the tickets,

get separate cabins.

I guess nobody told him that every cabin was booked.

And I'm not sleeping in a lifeboat

that could have been my sister.

Well, we'll just have to stay here and make the best of it.

How can you make the best of something that's the worst?

If they can stand it, I guess we can, too.

Speak for yourself.

I'd rather have termites.

Well, uh, what do you say we get something to eat?

If anyone cares to join us, we'll be in the dining room.

Right.

[Lounge music]

Good evening.

Good evening.

Good evening.

Who's the new girl?

I don't know, but she sure is stuck up.

Yeah.

You boys figure she's spoken for?

Oh, no, no, no, but I think she'd like to be.

Ah, that explains it.

Look how casually she's looking around the room.

Indifferent, yet conspicuous.

Hm, very well put.

Thank you.

[Blows raspberry]

- Hi, Ted. - Hi.

Hi, Gary.

Hi, guys.

[Laughs]

Oh, excuse me. Yes?

Well, hi.

Where's your sparring partner?

Over there with daddy.

Oh.

He, uh, sent me over to invite you to have dinner with us.

Oh, he did?

Yep.

Well, I think I'd love to.

Come on.

Thanks.

Oh, hello.

Hi.

Hi.

Hey, neat impression.

Dick Van dyke or Chevy chase?

Just klutzy me.

Ah.

Well, thank you for the invitation.

That's his good suit, new shirt, shaved twice,

shined his shoes.

I wonder why.

We're gonna get some dessert from the buffet

and then go out on deck.

Come on, Courtney.

Bye, dad.

Dessert?

You didn't invite me to dinner at all, did you?

You've already eaten.

Well, I certainly would have invited you if you'd just

gotten here a little earlier.

Oh.

Have a seat.

Thank you.

By the way, Jack chenault.

Julie McCoy.

How do you do?

Terrific.

How do you do?

Terrific.

Oh.

I really would have invited you earlier.

I wanted to, but I didn't have the nerve.

I'm glad my daughters have no shame.

[Laughs]

While I'm rolling, I've got another confession to make.

I did shave twice and shine my shoes

and put on my good shirt and my new suit

because I hoped I'd run into you.

Really?

Yeah.

Then I have something to tell you.

The last time I wore this dress, I thought that Robert redford

was going to be on board.

I put it on tonight because--

Robert redford's on board?

I thought I'd run into you.

No kidding?

No kidding.

Well, that's terrific.

Just--

terrific.

Oh, excuse me.

Could you get me a waiter, please?

I, uh, I have to do a show.

Oh, I'm sorry.

I'm sure your waiter thought you were waiting for someone.

Oh, I am, but I don't think the kitchen

stays open that late.

[Applause]

Where have you been?

I, uh, I had a long dessert.

I had to introduce the act myself.

You did?

Good work, gopher.

Carry on.

Female dummy: I hate to shock you, but I didn't go to dinner.

I was in the cabin.

Is that right?

Yeah.

How come?

I'd rather eat with a dummy than a dummy.

[Laughter]

Is that a knock?

Well, if it's not, it's a very good try.

Listen, I ordered pickled herring especially for you.

Pickled herring?

Uh-huh.

If I were there, I wouldn't eat it with her mouth.

What do you mean if you were there?

Didn't I kiss you at dinner?

I was in the cabin.

Don't tell me you were in the cabin--

we kissed.

Well, you must have awfully long lips to stretch

all the way down to the cabin.

[Laughter]

Well, if I didn't kiss you, who did I kiss?

Maybe it was a chair.

You're right, it did seem more passionate than you.

I hope you remember which chair it was,

because she's your date for the rest of the cruise.

[Applause]

Good night.

Great.

Terrific act.

[Sneezes]

Oh, captain, could you take this Rose, please?

My fiance is allergic.

- Of course. - Thanks.

Excuse me.

It's just part of my job.

It's a good thing Judy's not allergic.

It's one of the few ways you guys can tell us apart.

Well, uh, here's to the other ways.

Uh, what other ways?

Well, that's it for me.

I'm gonna get some sleep.

Me, too.

You guys are kidding?

The night is young!

Let's go!

Sorry, honey, I'm bushed.

Aw, come on, you guys.

Don't be a party poopers.

Judy, you party.

I'm pooped.

Future sister-in-law, let's show these guys some dancing.

All right.

You know what?

You and I ought to be an item.

We got all the moves.

Oh, Gary's a heavy dancer.

[Giggles] I should know-- he does

most of his dancing on my feet.

You sure you wouldn't rather be dancing?

Uh-uh.

Would you?

No, I, I'd rather--

what?

I'd rather be kissing you.

Oh.

Now, look, I'm not one of those guys who

thinks that just any girl wants to be grabbed,

especially by me.

I mean, the moment has to be right

and the indicators have to be there.

Indicators?

Well, sure.

Oh, you can tell when a girl wants to be kissed.

Is that so?

How do you tell?

[Chuckles]

Well, there's a certain receptiveness you can sense.

Oh, I see, like when a girl's leaning on you,

establishing physical contact, putting

her face very close to yours?

Yes, right.

Along those lines, yes.

Well, what do you do when you get these indicators?

When you sense this receptiveness?

Well, you have to understand, I was married for a long time

and I didn't go in a lot for trying things out

with new girls, so I'm rusty.

But the instincts are still there.

It's like riding a bicycle.

You never really forget how to sense this receptiveness.

So what you have to do is--

shut up and kiss her.

How's that?

Yeah, you just have to shut up.

Oh, you must have been a hell of a bicycle rider.

Yeah, you better believe it.

Oh, boy.

Fantastic.

You know, joanie, I'm going to get out of the city

and find a little shack on a beach someplace.

Do you think Judy would like that?

She'd be crazy if she didn't?

Sometimes I wish I were more like Judy-- you know,

the life of the party.

Oh, don't knock yourself.

You're a terrific person.

And I'm a lucky guy.

Not only do I get to marry the one and only girl of my dreams,

but I get a great sister-in-law as well.

Thanks, Gary.

That's a sweet thing to say.

If only Ted--

Ted?

Look, Ted's Ted.

He's wild, and that's why we love him.

You're getting a great guy, joanie.

Yeah.

Ah, good evening, Gary.

Judy.

Joanie.

Then you must be Ted.

Uh, Gary.

Ah.

I'll never get them straight.

Good night, doc.

Gopher.

[Laughing]

What are you laughing at?

I didn't say anything.

[Inaudible] Pickled herring.

Can you beat that?

I hate pickled herring.

Yeah.

How can you remember everything I hate

and nothing I love?

He remembers everything.

She loves watching old tearjerker movies on TV.

She loves eating pizza in bed.

She loves the smell of the city after a summer rain.

She loves buying useless gadgets from mail order catalogs.

She loves huddling close on cold, winter mornings.

She loves you.

Who said that, you or the dummy?

It was her.

Nice to have a little time to yourself sometime, isn't it?

I really like your girls.

Well, Julie's not really my girl.

As a matter of fact, I just met her today.

She sure is nice though.

Oh, I said "girls--" Ashley, Courtney.

[Chuckles]

Oh, oh, my girls.

Thank you.

I like them, too.

I mean, I love them.

Yeah, they're dynamite.

I like Julie, too.

I mean, I wouldn't call Julie a girl.

I mean, I'd call that a, a woman.

Oh, yeah, she certainly is that, all right--

a very lovely woman, too.

I suppose you two must be very good friends by now, huh?

Oh, yeah, about three years.

A girl like that--

I mean, a woman like that--

there must be a lot of guys chasing after her.

[Whistles]

A whole bunch.

But there's a big difference between chasing and catching.

Oh, sure.

Well, a woman in her position has to be very careful.

And with so many men on board, on vacation,

looking to have a good time--

yeah, but I wouldn't worry about Julie.

I mean, she's very careful.

Good.

Besides, the captain, doc, gopher

and I, we're always there to keep an eye on her, you know?

You're crazy about her, aren't you?

Well, I only just met her.

I hardly-- yeah.

Yes, I am.

That one's on me.

Good luck.

Alaska's far out.

In the summertime, it never gets dark.

You can play outside till 3 o'clock in the morning.

And stuff we grow in our garden gets just huge.

Lettuce this big.

Well, maybe.

It's true, all that sunshine.

It's fantastic.

How would you guys like one of my super special bloody Marys?

Eh.

Thanks anyway, Isaac, but I think we'll stick to our milk.

I've heard about your bloody Marys, Isaac.

It's 7:30 in the morning.

If I have one of those, I won't make it to 8:00.

So, uh, how about the winters?

Oh, it's great.

Sometimes it gets to 15 above in the day.

Ooh.

And you hook your car into a heater

every night so the engine doesn't freeze.

Are you guys on the chamber of commerce payroll or something?

Let's go get another Danish.

Another one?

They certainly are enthusiastic about Alaska.

I think it's you they're enthusiastic about.

Oh, well, I'll just have to try to make

it up there one of these days.

Julie, when my wife died I never thought I'd say this

to another woman, and after knowing somebody for one day,

it's preposterous.

But, but I love you.

Jack.

I'm not some romantic kid who doesn't

know when he's in love or not.

I, I know when I'm in love.

Jack.

You know, you're not being very cooperative.

When one dope says, I love you, the other dope is supposed

to say, I love you, too.

I love you, too.

You do?

Really?

No kidding?

No kidding.

Oh!

Julie, Isaac said we can't have a fifth Danish

unless you say so.

Please?

We're growing kids.

Ok.

But if you don't finish your Danish, no ice cream.

Be right back.

Now, that makes a pleasant picture.

You know something, Julie, you'd make a wonderful mother.

Michael?

Yeah?

Why can't it always be like last night?

Well, I guess because sooner or later

you have to get out of bed.

That's right.

In bed you don't have to talk.

Did you hear that?

Of course I heard it.

What do you think these things on the side of my head

are, seashells?

I think she's insinuating that I don't like to talk.

Is she kidding?

I can't get you to stop.

If you ask me, she's the one who never says what's on her mind.

Me?

Well, he said it, I didn't.

She's hard to reach.

Am I hard to reach?

Am I?

[Whispering]

Don't whisper.

Say it out loud.

I said, why pay attention to a log and bump on a log?

That's you.

You always fight back with an insult.

I have to.

That's all you understand.

Women, they're all the same.

We are not.

You just bring out the worst in me.

Well, there's certainly plenty to go around.

You're horrible.

Last night you were so loving, and today you're hateful.

Well, you know what they say--

there's a fine line between love and hate.

That's what they say, but I don't.

Let's get out of here.

Whatever you say.

Joanie?

Yeah?

You awake?

I guess so.

I just said "yeah."

Happy wedding day.

Same to you.

Judy?

Yeah?

I can't go through with it.

That's just nerves.

How do you know?

Because I feel the same way you do.

Nerves.

Nerves.

Either that, or we don't want to get married.

I've got nothing against getting married.

Me, neither.

So how come we've got nerves?

Probably because we're marrying the wrong guys.

Ted and Gary are nice.

Who else are we gonna marry?

I mean, we've got the wrong guys.

You should marry Gary.

I should marry Ted.

Yes!

You think so, too?

Why didn't you say something?

I don't know.

It's so obvious.

I mean, you and Gary have everything in common,

the same with me and Ted.

Maybe if we'd had longer engagements

we would have found this out in time.

There's still time.

Let's tell the guys.

Are you crazy?

It's our wedding day.

You're right.

We don't have to tell the guys.

All we have to do is switch places and they'll never know.

You are crazy.

It worked all through school, exams, senior prom,

the school psychologist.

Yeah, we almost drove him nuts.

It'll work.

Isn't it better than spending your whole life

with the wrong guy?

From now on, you're me.

[Interposing voices]

Nervous, fellas?

Ah, sure.

You don't get married every day, you know?

Doc does.

Good luck, Judy.

Good luck, joanie.

That's the last time I'll be calling you that.

Hey, there they are.

Ah.

Ah.

[Everyone hums wedding march]

What are you doing?

I couldn't find any rice, so I'm throwing pistachio nuts.

Joanie, darling, you look beautiful.

I'm Judy.

Well, I'm glad we found out now, rather than later.

[Chuckles]

Wait, I want to take a wedding picture.

I got four sets of my own I could let you have.

Aren't their wedding dresses pretty, Julie?

Oh, they sure are.

Bet you'd make a beautiful bride.

Oh!

I almost forgot.

Here you go.

They're beautiful, thank you.

Yes, they're-- [sneezes]

Good, now I know who's who.

The one with the allergy is joanie.

No, that's Judy.

[Applause]

I guess I'm just getting a cold.

That's good.

For a minute there.

I thought we had the wrong girls.

[Laughing]

All right, everybody, say "cheese."

Gorgonzola.

[Laughs]

- All right. - So long.

Good luck.

Talk to you later.

Bye!

Bye!

[Applause]

Very funny.

Very funny.

You sure know how to hurt a guy.

Hurt you?

How can you hurt someone with a heart of stone?

I thought you were made out of wood.

They're almost real.

Almost real?

How many guys do you know who have someone's

hand stuck through their back?

[Laughter]

It'd be easier to stick their hand through your head.

There's nothing between your two ears.

[Laughter]

Male dummy: Hey, how about a little kiss?

No.

How about a little hug?

No!

How about a little, uh, love?

No!

Well then, how about a little divorce?

[Laughter]

I, uh, I think you hurt Patti's feelings.

You know, divorce is nothing to joke about.

Right-- but their marriage is.

What difference does it make if they get divorced anyway?

Well, it means a lot to me.

I could get into some serious fooling around.

[Laughter & applause]

Sorry about my friend.

He, uh, he doesn't think too much before he speaks.

It's ok.

It's just a strange way to hear that you want a divorce.

I mean, we never talked about it before.

Well, I just thought i'd throw it in as part of the act,

you know?

Are you kidding?

Our whole marriage has been part of the act.

I suggest we leave the divorce stuff in.

What do you think of that?

Yeah, me, too.

I'll have the button sewn on your sweater by dinner

and I'll give it to you then.

I want to watch you sew.

Yeah, me, too.

I bet you stick yourself with the needle.

Well, if I do, I'll show you the hole in my finger later.

Now, off you go.

Your father probably thinks you've disowned him.

Now, see you later.

Bye.

[Laughs]

All right.

Hi, mom.

Mom?

Julie (thinking): Mom, the button you sewed

on my sweater came off again.

Mom, it's time to take me to girl scouts.

Mom, what's for dinner?

Mom, we don't like broccoli.

Mom, why didn't you iron my jeans?

Mom, why are you so upset and miserable?

It's because your daddy is the sexiest, most wonderful

man I ever met, and probably the best kisser in the whole world.

Kids are great, but it's all happening so fast.

I'm not ready for it.

I'm just too damn young to have grown up children.

Hey.

We were just about to send out a search party.

We missed you at dinner.

Did you sew on my button?

I sure did.

See?

Jack, I'm sorry about dinner, but something came up.

The captain needed to see me, some sort of emergency

or something, and--

no problem.

Better late than never.

Oh, well, you see, that's why I came down to talk to you.

I'm not finished working yet.

Well, that's all right.

We'll be around.

Just look for the guy with the silly grin on his face.

Ok.

I'll find you.

Bye.

- Bye. - Bye.

Bye.

Good evening.

Well, a lot you know.

Now, there my boys is a woman in love.

Golly, professor, how can you tell?

Well, she has all the symptoms.

She's, uh, testy, mean, evasive, shifty-eyed,

and walks around like she's going somewhere,

which we all know she ain't.

And scared to death.

Hm.

Hey, hey.

- Congratulations. - Thank you.

Thank you.

Be right back, joanie, darling.

I'll get the champagne.

I love you, Judy.

Thanks a heap, Judy.

You didn't tell me Gary wanted six kids.

I love kids.

You didn't tell me Ted didn't want his wife to work.

So you'll give up your career.

I will not.

Oh, congratulations.

[Chuckles] Oh, I see you're wearing

different wedding bands.

Well, finally I can tell you apart.

Uh, you are, um--

uh, Joan-- Judy.

Judy, joanie.

Now I'll never forget.

Congratulations again.

Judy, joanie.

Judy, joanie.

What are we going to do?

We goofed.

We shouldn't have switched.

I know, but what can we do?

We're married now.

Legally bound.

Judy: Bound is right.

Wait a minute.

Your husband thinks he's married to Judy, and that's me.

And my husband think he's married to joanie,

and that's you.

We can't.

All we have to do is switch back to our regular names,

then we'll match the marriage licenses

and we'll each be with the right guy.

It's illegal.

Judy: Joanie, it's like driving 60 in a 55 mile zone.

It's only illegal if you get caught.

Ok, we'll do it.

La da da, ta da da.

Hey, did you miss us? - Oh, yeah.

Yes.

Captain stubing: I finally figured out

a way to tell your wives apart.

Uh, may I see the rings?

Joanie, Judy.

Joanie and Judy: Right!

[Jazz music playing]

[Applause]

Ladies and gentlemen, we have a very talented twosome--

I should say foursome-- with us tonight.

I'm sure you already know them.

They've been entertaining you since the cruise began.

So let's have a very warm welcome for pat and Mike,

the harmons.

[Applause]

Good evening.

Good evening, ladies and gentlemen.

Gentlemen?

I guess that's us.

That'll be the day.

[Laughter]

You're starting on me again.

Well, uh, maybe she's only picking

on you because she loves you.

That'll be another day.

[Laughter]

Mike: What have you got against us?

Female dummy: I got nothing against you

and I got nothing for you, either.

[Laughter]

It doesn't matter.

This is the last time we'll be seeing each other.

Huh?

Michael wants to get a divorce.

Isn't that right?

That's what I heard.

Male dummy: Well, that doesn't mean we can't work together,

does it?

I hate to tell you this, but we

only say what they tell us to.

No.

If they got nothing left to say to each other--

they've got lots to say to each other,

but they just can't say it.

Things like, I'm sorry I never listened.

I'm sorry I took you for granted.

I'm sorry I was more interested in getting laughs

than I was in us.

Things like, I don't know how I'm going to live without you.

Oh, please--

please can't we give it another try?

Why, Michael, you're crying.

What's the matter, you never seen a guy cry before?

You think we got ice water in our veins?

Sap.

Sap is right.

I'm nearly sapping the crowd.

Hey, look Patti, let's not throw away everything.

I mean, I, I still love ya.

Oh, Michael.

[Applause]

Male dummy: Nice going, kid.

We're no dummies.

[Applause]

[Inaudible] You.

If you want to be on cameras, this is you.

Julie?

Oh, well, hi there.

How is every little thing?

Ok, I guess.

How's every little thing with you?

Me?

Terrific.

Couldn't be better.

You've been avoiding us.

Nonsense.

Avoiding you?

Julie, would you like us to tell you a story?

Sure.

Ok.

Oh, thank you.

Well, you see, it's about my aunt Cathy.

Uh-huh.

She got married to uncle frank when she was 17 years old

and had all these little babies.

Only four.

They're our cousins.

Well, now she's old, 30 maybe, and she lives with a rock band.

Yeah?

Well, where are her kids?

Courtney: They live with uncle frank.

Ashley: Do you know why she went away

and lives with a rock band?

Why?

Because she never got to be a young person.

That what she told daddy.

Well, anyway, I guess that's why you're

getting cold feet about marrying daddy and coming

to live with us in Alaska.

Being our mother.

Yeah, that's me--

old, cold feet Julie.

Aw, listen, you guys are great and I'm crazy about you.

And I'm especially mad about your father.

I, I just wish that--

that he didn't have us?

No, no.

No.

I just don't want to have a whole family

all at the same time.

I want a gradual family.

I want to be a young person for a while longer.

I love you.

Aw!

Gee, when a girl breaks up with a guy's kids, it's, uh--

oh, Jack.

I'm so sorry.

I am so sorry.

You know, I think I'll be glad to go back to work.

Falling in love is exhausting.

I know.

Jack--

you don't have to say a word.

I don't want to tie anybody down, unless that person

wants to be tied down.

Jack, you're a wonderful man and I

care about you a great deal.

Well, that's something we have in common, because I

care a great deal for you, too.

You want to go inside and have a drink?

No.

A little dancing?

Uh-uh.

Midnight buffet?

Uh-uh.

Hey, don't tell me you've run out of ideas.

[Laughs]

[Ship horn blows]

Gopher: Goodbye.

Boy, I'm glad you two guys had a change of heart.

And a change of address.

At least he is.

He's moving in with us again.

Ah, then we'll be seeing the team of pat and Mike again,

huh?

Oh, not if it's a cold winter.

We'll be too busy keeping warm.

That looks like fun.

Want to try it?

I'm game.

Timber!

Whee!

I bet

I bet they'd rather have children.

Captain stubing: Goodbye.

Goodbye.

Goodbye, I hope we see you all again soon.

But next time under happier circumstances.

At least now I know how to tell you apart.

Well, that's easy.

That's Gary and that's Ted.

Captain stubing: I have a better idea.

Here.

Never take those off.

Now, that should do it.

Sorry, captain.

I think you've lost it, merrill.

Stop.

Would you get out of here?

Goodbye. - Take care.

Bye.

Enjoy your lives.

Have a good honeymoon.

Bye-bye.

It was nice meeting you.

Oh, it was wonderful meeting you.

Julie?

Hm?

I, I wish you were coming to Alaska.

Courtney, shut up.

She has a big mouth.

I was just going to say, if you ever get to Alaska, look us up.

I will.

Oh, Julie, I wish you were coming with us.

Will the real big mouth please stand up?

[Laughs]

Love you.

I love you.

Bye.

Bye, Julie.

I love you.

I love you.

Bye.

I'm gonna miss you.

Uh-huh.

Julie, maybe we--

oh, Jack, no.

Yeah.

Well--

if you ever get to L.A. again, you could look me up.

Sure.

If you ever get up to Alaska--

you know, that's not altogether impossible.

We have cruises and I could get on one of them

accidentally and--

maybe on purpose.

Sure.

Well, if you do, look me up.

Oh!

Yeah.

Bye.

[Theme music]